Things to do in Springfield when wearing the Mask
by TimeLordParadox
Summary: Homer J. Simpson buys a strange mask as a last minute birthday present for Bart, but he doesn't know what he's letting everyone in for because the wearer of this particular mask gains unlimited power and the drive to do one thing only, to cause mischief.
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer: **I do not own, in anyway the Simpsons or the Mask.

*Update*

**Author's notes: **I've changed the title of the story because 'The Masque of the Green Death' didn't sound good enough.

(Additional) I just want to say that the opinions expressed by the characters in this story do not reflect my own, thank you.

Enjoy

* * *

When a giant beaver dam is blown up in Springfield it releases an object that has been trapped since the beavers built the structure, a green, wooden mask. The Mask has found its way to Springfield where Homer buys it as a last minute birthday present for Bart but he doesn't knowe what he's letting Springfield in for because anyone who wears the Mask gains almost unlimited power and the drive to do one thing only, to cause mischief.

* * *

The Simpsons/The Mask crossover

**Things to do in Springfield when wearing the Mask**

By TimeLordParadox

(aka Ross Pickering)

**Prologue**

Mr. Channel Six also known as Kent Brockman sat waiting for his signal to begin speaking to the public of Springfield, he put on his most cheery face which didn't really look that cheery. It's not as if any of those idiots out there care what he said he thought, most of them just want the sports results or if any celebrities showed themselves up in public recently.

He glanced down at his notes again, reading through them so he didn't have to glance down at them all of the time. The Springfield Isotopes had lost to the team from Shelbyville, he couldn't remember what they were called because after all, no one in Springfield cared about Shelbyville. Springfield Elementary is in trouble again due to lack of funds, no surprise there. Drunk driving is up 15% and the price of bear is set to skyrocket. The last thing on his list was the destruction of a dam, beavers or platypuses whichever were the ones that built dams had built a massive one across one of the small lakes next to Springfield River. This meant the environmentalists were bad mouthing again. They were arguing that the dam shouldn't be destroyed for one reason in particular. Not because it might destroy beaver habitats or that it might cause a flood but because the dam actually helps the environment by blocking all the pollutants which came out of the local power plant.

'The Springfield river has never been cleaner then it has been for over ten years' they argued, while the boss of the plant local multibillionaire Monty Burns said it ruins his so called 'eco-friendly' solution to the waste problem. Instead of hiring trucks to come in especially to take the radioactive material away which would cost a fortune in fuel and would cause global warming he said he'd hire mother nature to do the cleaning for them.

This gave an all round of cheers from Burn's supporters and to some environmentalists who's leaders were no doubt being paid off by Burns to shut up. But as a newsreader Kent Brockman wasn't allowed to say that and why should he, it's not as if he'd get any more money for saying stuff like that.

The assistant began counting down as he finished reading the last of what he's supposed to say. The news opening music started 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 and he's on. The lights became brighter so those viewing in TV land could see him.

"Kent Brockman Channel Six news" he always started like that, "Tonight we look at the Springfield's Isotopes unlucky defeat against Shelbyville, also coming up! Shocking news as drink driving is up 15% and Springfield Elementary is in trouble again. But first…" He decided to get this bit over and done with. "… Local multibillionaire tycoon Monty Burns is to oversee the demolition of the Springfield Giant Beaver dam which has made Springfield River cleaner then it's been in the past 10 years since the nuclear power planet first opened."

A picture showing the Springfield nuclear plant faded into view to the right of Kent Brockman's head. "The Giant Beaver dam was, up until now an area of special scientific interest to environmentalists since its appearance coincided with the appearance of the famous Green Headed Mad-beaver"

An artists' interpretation of the Green Headed Beaver appeared. It looked normal in every way a beaver should, or its body looked normal because its head was green and a little too large for its body and sticking out of its eye sockets were two red eyes which budged out as if they were too big for its skull. Its front teeth were also massive and jagged. The picture looked more like a caricature rather then an actual living creature but that's what eye witnesses described about it.

Kent continued on with the news story "The Green Headed Mad-beaver appeared in Springfield a year ago when log removal companies tried to cut down the forests north of Springfield, it reportedly terrorised workers and eye witness described the creature as actually eating the tires of their vehicles. Some believed the creature was a mutation from the nuclear plant, others say it's a brand new species, others say it was just mass hysteria and everyone who was involved in the attack has since been placed in a mental institution, yet the explanation of the dam was that the Mad-beaver created it to save its habitat from the hand of man."

"Booooring!" came a dull drone.

The TV was quickly turned over, instead of the channel six news the TV now showed a pile of crashed cars which were being run over by a huge monster truck, this was more like it!

Homer Simpson, a large, rounded –I hesitate to use the word fat- man is sitting down on a sofa the remote in his hand and an orange hard hat on his head. He looked bored but perked up when he saw the monster trucks on TV.

"OOOOoooh, monster truck mayhem"

"Hey Homer" came another voice, this one a little lighter "Aren't you supposed to check the safety things for the dam destruction?"

Homer gave a bored look and said, "Nah, I'll do it when I get there, Lenny"

"We are there" said Lenny peaking through the hole in the tent where Homer was, all the action was going on outside and Homer was sitting in the construction workers tent watching TV and eating do-nuts "The dams going to be blown up any minute, Burns needs to know if you've done your safety checks?"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, safety checks done" he said idly leaning in closer to the TV

Lenny unlike Homer was tall and thin, also unlike Homer he had a head of hair, while Homer was mostly balled with two strands of hair combed over as if no one would notice. Homer also had a small amount of hair above his ears which together looked like an M and a G which some found odd but Lenny never asked questions personal questions like that, often at least.

Lenny left the tent and walked up to his colleague, Carl, an African American man to use the politically correct phrase, wearing an orange safety hat.

"Did he do the checks?" Carl asked.

Lenny shrugged "He said he's done them, that's all Burns asked for" he said as he placed his own hard hat on top of his head.

Homer was of course supposed to be the safety inspector for the plant and he must be doing a good job because Burns wanted him to oversee the safety inspection for the dam break up. Though at the time Burns also muttered something about being cheaper and more expendable, whatever that meant, they didn't know all three were only half listening when he said it.

Carl and Lenny walked up to the podium where Monty Burns was ready to push the plunder that would detonate and destroy the beaver dam. In the far side of the clearing was a group of angry protesters who were still against the destruction of the dam despite them not being able to do a thing about it.

Next to the podium was the lake, a green lake that environmentalists always insisted was green because of the power plants toxic waste, Burns always insisted it was 'young hooligans relieving themselves in the river' everyone seemed to accept that, especially when they saw a different sort of green waved in their faces.

Further onward was the beaver dam soon to be destroyed, it was a massive structure reaching for two stories into the air for no apparent reason. It was almost as if someone had started it and decided to simply keep going for the heck of it. This had caused the lake to swell to massive proportions to become more like a reservoir then a lake and it was so well made that no water leaked from it until it overflowed.

At the opposite end of the lake over a small hill there was the power plant, its cooling towers steaming away. A pipe led down to the lake with glowing green slime at its rim where it hung over the lake. The source of the pollutants the environmentalists had insisted.

Homer once went inside believing the ghost Slimer hiding in it, 'Ghosts have rights too you know!" Homer had insisted 'he need a place to stay and the Ghostbusters went out of business years ago. I'm gonna invite him home for a bear."

Homer never found Slimer in there but came out covered in green goo which he thought was ectoplasm and would enable him to pass through walls though every time he tried he hit solid wall and he kept leaving a green slime trail everywhere he went. Some insisted he went to see a doctor but this was two weeks ago and he seemed alright, though some claimed when Homer said "Talk to the Hand because the face don't wanna hear it anymore" there was actually an ear inside the palm of his hand.

Lenny climbed a short set of steps to the podium and informed Monty Burns that all was ready. Burns was a thin man with no chin, a massive over bite, a balled head and a body like Gollum from Lord of the Rings but taller.

"Excellent" said Burns tapping his fingers together at the news, standing next to him was Mr. Smithers his assistant who was always with Burn no matter where he was, Smithers was also Burns' carer because he did everything Burn's couldn't do himself as well as the things Burns could do himself but chose not to.

Burns turned to the crowd of onlookers stuck behind the chain link fence some wore Green Peace T-shirts and carried slogan signs to demanding they stop this at once. He'll have to pay someone to dispose of them at some point Burns decided.

He turned back to the green lake, the EPA said 'clean this place up or they shut the plant down', but they didn't specify how to clean it up. He smiled darkly it was much too expensive for him to get a clean up crew to do all the work, he could afford it naturally but he was a great believer in the cheapest ways are always the best, because it meant you spent less money. It was much easier and cheaper to destroy the dam and let Mother Nature take his waste away. After all it's all she is good for these days handling humanities waste.

He reached out for the plunger and got ready to press it down. "And now the moment we've all been waiting for" he said revelling in the screams of protest from the brown behind the fence. He put all his strength into it and pushed. But the stubborn thing refused to move, he tried harder no it still won't move. _Come on you stupid thing_ he thought to himself _you think you can do this to Monty Burns you have another thing coming_. He tried climbing on top of it still nothing even jumping up and down wasn't moving it.

Panting and out of breath Burns gave up and gestured to his assistant Mr. Smithers to push the plunger, which he managed with little effort. As the plunger went down a soft escape of air from the plunger box told them it had been pressed all the way down… nothing happened.

BANG!

An explosion rang out but the dam was still standing in place, everyone looked at where the explosion had come from. There was a small crater where a couple of trucks containing spare sticks of dynamite had been parked up. Burns looked down at the plunger and saw the wires that connected it to the dynamite, he watched the wires disappear over the podium and snake their way over to where the trucks had been. His face went from surprise to genuine fury.

"Who planted those charges?" Burns demanded

From the construction tent Homers head appeared "WILL YOU KEEP IT DOWN!" he shouted "PEOPLE ARE TRYING TO WATCH TV"

Burns looked wide eyed as Homer disappeared back inside the tent "Smithers, who was that man?"

"Homer J. Simpson sir, one of your employees from sector 7G" he replied

"Simpson eh?" Burns replied "What's he doing here?"

"Simpson was supposed to perform safety checks sir, on the site"

"Hmm. You do get what you pay for" his voice took on a more dark tone as he said that, a couple of trucks may have been destroyed but that was no big loss "At least the dam is demolished" he added.

"Sir, the dam didn't blow up"

"Didn't it?" Burns said looking surprised at Smithers

"No only the dynamite trucks exploded" he explained "The dams still standing"

"Oh, curse these damn cataracts!" he said rubbing his eyes for a moment.

When he was satisfied he could see more clearly he went over to the dam and vented his furry on it, kicking it and slamming his arms into it and even went as far as to try to lift one of the heavy logs away, all to no avail his aged old body was much too weak. Burns took a few steps back and turned panting to Smithers.

"Smithers" he said as he lay down on the floor clearly out of breath "Carry on"

"Yes sir" Smithers said but before he could do anything he noticed a small stone had fallen from the dam to the wet ground. He looked up at where it had come from, at first nothing everything was calm, except the birds in the trees had suddenly decided to fly away all at once and small woodland critters scampered away to safety, a low rumbling had started up, then the entire dam started to shake apart, the logs began parting and the green lake started to come through.

Everyone below started running away as the dam fell apart and the water broke through, they all climbed to higher ground as the raging torrent followed them, they just made it.

"That was a close one sir" said Smithers dusting down his aged boss.

But one man hadn't made it he came floating across screaming for help. His body began changing shape in the toxic waste, his nose grew to seven times its size and multiple arms sprang from his torso. Eyes also began appearing everywhere over his body.

"Smithers" Burns said turning to his colleague

"Yes sir?"

"Send that man an apology card?" he said "In fact no, don't send it to him I'm not paying those postage prices, in fact forget the card just leave him a note with the word sorry at his work station"

"Sir, I don't think he'll survive this" Smithers said looking on

"Eh, well forget the whole thing then, save us the paper"

With the show over everyone turned to leave, all the debts in the dam would float down into Springfield River from there it was out of their hands and into someone else's.

Small bits of rotting wood were covered in glowing gunk from the lake as they were carried along by the river but if anyone looked hard enough they would see a piece of wood which wasn't glowing at all. It had once been part of the dam sealed away from man for so long but now it was loose again. The object was in the shape of a mask, a mask with flaking green paint on it and a metal bar running down the centre of its face, it was also the only object to be covered in the green gunk and not glow. The odd artefact floated down the river with the rest of the debts, down towards the town of Springfield.


	2. The Eleventh Birthday

Chapter 1

The Eleventh Birthday

BUZZ, BUZZ, BUZZ, BUZZ

"Ummmm, Buzz cola agghhhh!" Homer drooled in his sleep, the high pitched buzz still kept coming as he rolled over in his bed still not awake.

"Homer, turn your alarm off!" came a female voice into his subconscious it was Marge Simpson his wife, but he didn't pay any attention he was thinking about cool buzz cola on a hot summers day the taste of cool cola on a dry tongue, what would be better then buzz cola on a summers day? Bear he decided, a cool bear, Duff bear.

"Ummmm, Duff bear, Agghhhh!" he drooled again.

Marge could stand the sound of the alarm no longer, she reached over her large husband and tried to turn it off but Homers massive form meant she couldn't get past him. She was about to resign herself to get out of bed and walk around to shut it off when an idea came to her.

"Homer" she said softly in his ear "there's a cup cake on your clock just waiting to be eaten"

"Ummmm, Cup Cake, Aggghhh!" he was drooling again

"Chocolate, with whipped cream" she added almost seductively.

With surprising speed for someone who's asleep Homer rolled over reached out to get his cup cake which wasn't really there and hit the alarm clock which stopped buzzing as soon as he hit it. But Homer didn't stop there he opened his mouth and shovelled the alarm clock inside and bit down on it and immediately had an electric shock flow through his body. He convulsed and what little hair he had stood on end, the two strands of hair in particular at the top of his head now had an electrical current passing between them.

Panicking Marge leaped out of bed went over to his clock and pulled out the power cable and Homers spasms stopped, he now just lay there nibbling on the alarm clock.

"Hmm, chocolate cupcake with whipped cream and electric filling, Aggghhh" he was still asleep and drooling again.

Marge gently moaned at Homers unbreakable sleep and decided it was probably time to get up anyway. It only took her a couple of seconds to get dressed in her usual attire of a long green dress with a red pearl necklace and red high heeled shoes. She looked in the mirror and checked her hair was in place. It was tall, blue and bushy and it rose into the air a good few feet above her head.

She left Homer to his sleep, she couldn't remember why Homer set his alarm for seven in the morning when on weekends he usually hibernates until ten or eleven when lunch is served.

Marge went down stairs and she listened for anyone else moving around in their bedrooms, she couldn't hear anyone so she had a good head start to get breakfast ready before the kids woke up.

Homer and Marge had three kids, one their youngest was Maggie a baby girl of about two years of age.

Their second oldest was Lisa, a young, bright girl who always got A+'s in her school work and was incredibly intelligent even though she was eight years old, yet despite her intellect and maturity she still had a childish side to her.

Their eldest and first born was an unruly boy called Bart, always getting into trouble at school for disruption lessons and classes, he liked to play pranks on his friends and Lisa as well but Marge often had hope Bart would mature at some point and today might be the start of it because today was Bart's eleventh birth day.

It was odd though because it seemed as if Bart should be much older for some reason there was just this feeling in the back of her head that Bart should've been eleven long ago but she didn't dwell on it.

They had set up a surprise party for Bart for the afternoon, his ant Patty and Selma would be there along with Milhouse one of Bart's friends, Grandpa Simpson, Homers father and a few other of Bart's friends from school, Martin and… who else was there? Nelson… she couldn't think of all the others but they were all invited.

Their main problem was getting Bart out of the house, a problem that had to fall on Lisa because Marge and Homer would be busy with everything else. Lisa had suggested she take Bart to a museum, but they both knew that would never happen, whatever it was they needed to keep Bart occupied so he wouldn't come home early. Milhouse, Bart's best friend was going to go with them just so they could keep him occupied though Lisa for some reason almost changed her mind when Milhouse was mentioned. It was probably best Milhouse went with them because Lisa wouldn't be able to hold Barts attention for very long by herself. Milhouse was going to take Bart and Lisa on a bike ride into the woods where they would be preoccupied.

There suddenly came a loud thud from above the living room as if something heavy had been dropped and a loud moan of "D'oh!" came, Homer had finally gotten or by the sound of it fallen out of bed.

* * *

Bart's eyes lazily opened, he didn't want to get up now, why did this stupid head of his decide to wake him up now? He was just having a dream, what was it? He couldn't remember, but it was great. At least he didn't have to get up now he could just wait to go back to sleep.

But something was nagging him at the back of his head telling him to wake up. What for? He asked himself, breakfast won't be ready, Homer will still be hibernating for the weekend, the Krusty the Clown show wasn't on until between 9 and 10 now, he could count a list of reasons why he didn't want to get up but there was still something nagging him at the back of his head.

What day was it? He thought for a moment, it was Friday yesterday, he only knew that because School was over now until Monday came which made this… Saturday. A small voice in his head said 'Happy Birthday to you' he continued to sleep until the meaning of those words came into focus.

Birthday? It was his birthday! That's why he wanted to wake up! Birthdays meant a party, cake and best of all, presents! His eyes snapped open and he looked at the ceiling excitedly, birthdays were the best days before Christmas.

He knew exactly what he was going to do today, first he was going to have breakfast while opening his presents, he had looked forward to this day because it was the only day he knew he was going to get a chance of getting the new Radioactive man action figure set with Fallout boy, a glowing radioactive barrel, the Radiation Mobile plus accessories, before Christmas.

He and Milhouse would then ride their bikes into the woods, Milhouse had suggested they look at the damage caused by the destruction of that giant wooden beaver dam from the previous night. They'd take a few fire crackers just in case the opportunity arose to have a laugh.

He opened his eyes again and got up out of bed, his bedroom was covered in posters of Krusty the Clown and Radioactive man, toys and clothes littered his floor which he had to step over to get to a chest of draws for fresh clothes. His usual red T shirt, blue shorts and blue shoes were all he needed.

He checked himself in the mirror and saw his spiky blond hair was still pointy before flinging the door open and running outside but stopped short when he nearly ran into Lisa, his nerdy sister.

"Hey Bart, happy Birthday!" she said, why was she up already? He wondered. What time was it really? He was sure it was only eight o'clock or something like that.

Lisa was a little shorter then Bart about an inch or so she was also younger then him by only two years, she wore a red dress which had points at the bottom, a white pearl necklace around her neck and sandals which matched the colour of her dress. Similar clothes to what his mom wore. Lisa's hair was blond and spiked out of her head in all directions unlike Barts which was spiked upwards.

"Hey Lisa" he said unenthusiastically turning around to close the door to his bed room, if his mom found out the state it was in she'd nag him for a week.

He walked quickly down the stairs followed by Lisa, they could hear upstairs loud regular thuds, this was the sound their dad made when he was trying to squeeze into his pair of blue pants and hopped up and down when he tried to force his fat backside into them.

They entered the kitchen and saw his mom working at the sink cleaning pots. Bart climbed into a chair and sat down, already laid out on the table was a white bowl, a spoon, a carton of milk and a box of Krusty-o's. He picked up the box and began tipping the Krusty-o's into his bowl.

"How's my little birthday boy" came his moms voice as she knelt down to hug him, Bart struggled to break the hug and push her away. "Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you" she began singing.

"MOM!" he complained trying to wriggle free, his annoyance only grew when he looked over at Lisa who was also singing along with her mother, only she wasn't doing it to wish him a happy birthday more just to mock his situation. When his mom did finally let him go he picked up the milk and poured it into his cereal.

Lisa was preparing her own breakfast, a cereal that had something to do with ponies or donkeys or something girly like that. He often wondered how a dweeb like her could be related to someone cool like him.

"And what are you two going to do today?" came Marge's voice as she continued to do her chores.

"I'm going to view the damage done to the Springfield Giant Beaver dam" said Lisa "and the damage its doing to the environment, I'm going to write about how wrong it was to destroy it!" she said almost with a passion and a hint of anger. Lisa always was a bit of an eco freak.

"I'm going to check out the damage the dams doing to the river, Millhouse said he saw something cool there the other night"

"That's nice kids" she said still working on her tasks.

As Bart finished his cereal he thought it would be pretty funny if he loaded his spoon with Krusty-o's and lobbed them at Lisa, and so he did.

"Bart!" yelled Lisa as the wet O shaped cereal fell on her face.

"What?" Bart asked innocently, as Lisa wiped the O's off her face, but when she wasn't looking and his mom had gone out of the room, -hopefully to get him his presents- he reloaded and launched his air to dweeb projectiles.

"BART STOP IT!" Lisa screamed

Bart laughed almost hysterically but stopped immediately as Lisa got out of her seat and walked menacingly towards Bart.

"Hey, hey, it's my birthday remember!" he said leaping off his chair and moving away "You can't hurt me on my birthday I'm indestructible until the stroke of midnight, OW!" he yelled as something flew through the air and slammed into his forehead, Lisa had thrown the remote control to the TV into his face, the impact didn't leave a lasting impression but a lump did start to form.

They heard foot steps from their mom coming back into the kitchen, before she could see anything Lisa had leapt back into her chair and sat as if nothing had happened and Bart got back just in time as she came through the door.

To Bart's surprise his mom wasn't carrying any presents just the mail which she put down on the table. Bart picked up the pile and ruffled through it looking for a birthday card or two. He found two, one from Millhouse who left him a dollar in the card. He didn't really care about the card, just the money that was in it. The other was from Grandpa Simpson, but you could tell it wasn't really from him because for one it said 'To Homer' crossed out and 'To Bart' written above it. This was obviously the same card Homer got from Grandpa last year and Grandpa took it back when Homer's birthday was over and decided to reuse it, in the bottom corner it said 'no money, be grateful you're getting a card, with to days postage prices I can't afford to give out dollars like that! In my day you were lucky to get a card, toilet paper is all we ever got on our birthdays and…

Bart closed the card he didn't really like listening to Grandpa's one sided conversations so he wasn't going to sit down and read one.

Marge then dropped quite a few letters onto the table in front of him which she had pulled out from her tall hair, more birthday cards "Here you go my special little guy"

"Mom, stop it!" he said as he opened another card, no money and it was from ant Patty and Selma, his two least favourite ants. Another was from his mom and dad who each gave him two dollars.

Another was from his Mom's mom who gave him another dollar, that made 6. The next one he could tell immediately who it was from, since it mentioned the words brother on the front. Opening the card it was 'lots of love from Maggie and Lisa' written in Lisa's impossibly neat handwriting, at least she put in two dollars, one from Maggie the other from Lisa.

He got cards from school friends and the others he only received because they were friends of his parents. There was even one from Flanders their religious neighbour and the card itself looked very Christian but didn't contain any money. _If he could afford to throw money away to worship a god he would never get to see until the day he died he could afford to give him one dollar for every 365 days_ Bart thought_._

After he got through all the cards he wanted the big things now, his presents, he asked where they were and his mom detached herself from whatever it was she was doing and brought them to him. It was a small pile but his friends would probably bring more. He knew all along about the so called surprise party that was going on tonight. Millhouse was pretty lousy at keeping secrets, if it wasn't for the dam blowing up yesterday he probably would've stayed in all day until the party.

One really small present was from Patty and Selma who got him a pair of socks and nail clippers just like last year and like last year the socks were going to be too small for him. He brought a larger looking present closer to him, his hopes of the Radioactive man set crept into his mind but when he looked at the label he saw it was from Lisa and Maggie.

Disappointment filled his mind, he imagined Lisa got him some sort of book or something remotely educational, but he got a surprise when he peeled away wrapping paper and found himself facing the picture of a skateboard. It said on the box it had something called, 'stronger grip tape' and 'revolutionary design in the rotation trucks and bearings' as well as loads of words Bart didn't really know the meaning of, either way he assumed it meant it was better then his old one.

"Hey" is all he could say through the surprise in his mind "Umm…Thanks Lisa"

"You're welcome birthday boy" she said in a half sweet half mocking tone which Bart didn't like. It wasn't what he most wanted but it was a great gift at least.

Those which followed weren't so, no present from grandpa except a bottle of whisky or brandy or something like that. grandpa always used to say "my father always let me drink whisky at his age, never did me no harm" the only problem was that his mom didn't agree so the night before Bart knew Homer would've drunk the entire bottle.

The next few were video games from his parents, but not one of these things was the one thing he wanted most, he guessed he'd just have to wait until the party that night. He'd waited 2 months what's another few hours? He thought to himself, he could spend the morning practicing on his new skateboard.

* * *

The hours just seemed to fly past in Homers mind, whether at work or not it always flew past, especially when he was watching something on TV which he did when he came home from work that day only Marge kept insisting he help prepare Barts birthday party.

"Marge the boys eleven" he moaned "His life's over let him live out the rest of it with socks and shaving cream"

Marge still moaned at him until Homer got up, Marge wanted him to set up a table with food on it. But when she saw how Homer was looking at the food longingly she quickly changed her mind, that and when he said "Alright Marge, but if they get eaten it's your own fault" instead she let Homer do as he pleased confident she'd get through the chores faster if he didn't help her. She stilled loved him but sometimes he just made things difficult.

This was fine by Homer, being able to do what he liked was just how he liked to live life. He now lay in his hammock in the back garden which was tied to two trees, he had a beer on his stomach and was fast a sleep. If this wasn't the life he didn't know what was.

As he slept he thought about the world, mostly about how better the world would be if everything was made of chocolate like it was in Germany. The land of chocolate, how he wanted to visit Germany, first they were fighting in the second world war now they make it up to the world by building their country out of chocolate, what apology works better then some chocolates? That's what he usually does when he falls out with Marge, he buys her a box of chocolates, though he eats nearly all of them so he always provided a back up plan of flowers, they smelled pleasant but they didn't taste good.

God created all things so why create something which smelled so good and tasted so awful he woundered and another thing why do they have to go to church every week for one hour and listen to a boring man read a book? He had a bible and he'd read it… some of it, actually he just watched the Greatest Story Ever Told which was pretty much the same thing. He'd fallen asleep after ten minutes but he was there that's what counted.

"Homer" came Marges voice snapping him out of his philosophical discussion he was having with his brain. That wasn't a good sign and he knew it, when it did that he knew it wanted more bear. "Homer, where did you put Bart's other presents?"

He didn't open his eyes, Bart's other presents? What did he do with them? He tried to remember, they were usually in the basement where no one looked. Patty and Selma's presents to Bart were down there with his, it's the only place he put them and the only place the kids never looked because Patty and Selma always bought them toe nail cutters. Though once they bought Homer a girdle which he knew they only got to annoy him so he threw it away, it wasn't even worth keeping.

But what about the other presents he'd bought Bart? Lets see now, he bought it two days ago. He was standing in line at the Toy-Mania, a new shop which sold nothing but toys. He remembered what Bart wanted, something called the Radio man set or something.

Now lets see he remembered parking up he got out of the car walked up to the shop walked in and walked around for a bit looking for this Radio thingy when he noticed an unattended trolley and couldn't resist taking it and running as fast as he could before lifting his feet off the ground and climbing in like a bumper car. The trolley had collapsed as soon as he got inside which was a bit of a downer. He wasn't hurt but the woman who was using the trolley was annoyed, there was nothing in it but apparently her baby who was in the child seat.

The store clerks immediately threw him out and he had completely forgotten why he was in there, now he remembered what he was in for he was in to get the stupid figure and he didn't get it.

He didn't get it?

His eyes snapped open, he didn't get it and the following day he forgot as well! Marge was standing by the back door waiting for him to answer, "Umm, uh oh" he said to himself, thinking quickly he said "I err left them at Moes" he fibbed "so he wouldn't find them" Marge look suspiciously at him, Homer quickly got out of his hammock.

"I'll just go to Moes and pick them up" he said as he gently walked and half crept out of the backyard gate to his car. Once beyond the gate he broke into a run, wrenched open the door of his car and climbed inside, slammed the door shut and started the engine.

"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god" he kept saying over and over as he took the gear leaver and put the car in reverse and sped out of the drive nearly running over Flanders while trying to back out.

"OH GOD!" Flanders cried as he fell backwards from the near miss "...BLESS HIM!" he added quickly to his curse.

Homer then put his car in drive and sped off, he needed to get to Toy-Mania and get that toy before Bart got back, it was now 5pm so he had plenty of time and the shop didn't close until 6pm. This was the worst day this week, he'd forgotten Bart's birthday present if he didn't get him one Marge would be annoyed, plus he remembered how Lisa was when he didn't get what she wanted for her birth day, what would Bart be like. Above all the worst thing of all today was he had the chance to run Flanders over but missed by a whisker.

* * *

The Springfield River was a sorry sight, the destruction of the Giant Beaver dam is going to have untold effects for the river and the wildlife swimming in it. Lisa looked over the rail into the river which was now a murky brown colour while Bart and Milhouse were a few feet away with a stick poking at a dead fish they'd found near the bank, that was the 'cool thing' Milhouse had found, well it was keeping Bart occupied at least.

Milhouse was the same height as Bart but his face was slightly more rounded, his hair was blue in colour and was side parted, he wore glasses so thick they magnified his beady eyes to three or four times their actual size. Above his eyes were a set of big blue bushy eye brows that noticeably bobbed up and down as he spoke.

"Look at it" Lisa said to no one in particular "This is probably now the most polluted river in the world" actually she could think of one other river in particular she knew about that was also very dirty but at least fish still survived in the London river Thames.

She felt sorry for all the fish in there that had to live through the torment people put them through. Even the ducks were having trouble finding food in the river.

A duck settled on the waters edge and dipped its head down to look for fish when a massive six eyed fish came up with its jaws held open and swallowed the duck in one gulp.

She signed defeated. She couldn't be there to protest against the destruction of the dam she had to be in school when it came down but she doubted if her actions would've had any effect. The rich always won out in this world and if they couldn't get their own way legally they buy and bribe their way through until they got what they want.

Large bits of wood floated by, all of them were rotting and covered in the green muck from the power plant.

She turned to look at Bart as he continued to poke the dead fish as if expecting it to transform into something else or give one final gasp of life. _Small things amused small minds_ she mused.

A strange piece of wood caught her eye as it floated down the bank, it was shorter then the other pieces of wood and wasn't covered in muck, it also had a strange shape which made it look more like a boat then a simple slab of wood. Beavers never used large pieces like that to build a dam it's usually smaller pieces and sticks which were easier to carry, but then again the Great Dam itself had been made from large logs.

She took a stick from a tree that was obviously dying from the pollution in the river and tried to hook the piece of wood and bring it closer to her. It was coming, it came to the bank and she knelt down to pick it up and brought it out of the water. Suddenly all around it several eyes opened and stared right at her, she yelped as she dropped the mutation back into the river and it swam away.

"Cool!" came Bart's voice as he fished something else out of the river, it was covered in gunk and slime but there was no mistaking what it was, a stick of dynamite. Lisa knew full well that a dynamite truck had exploded yesterday rather then the dam because of her fathers mixing up the dynamite sticks which meant those that were actually placed in the dam never exploded, and now Bart had hold of one.

"Bart!" Lisa cried "Put that back its dynamite its dangerous"

"Cool" Bart said making sure to draw out the 'oo' in cool. "Forget cherry bombs Milhouse we should put this down the school toilets."

"Bart, it's dangerous it could kill someone!" Lisa complained.

"Danger is our middle names" said Milhouse in a feeble attempt to sound cool and confident to impress Lisa. He always had a crush on her, though Lisa would like a boy friend she admitted she wasn't that desperate.

"Why do you have to ruin everything that's good?" Bart said holding the stick up in the air, but in the next second it was gone.

"I'll take that!" said the voice of a cubby man, Bart spun around to see who it was that just took his new found dangerous possession. It was Police Chief Clancy Wiggum, a large man as fat as Homer only with a chubbier face, he also had a head of blue hair which was mostly hidden under the police cap on his head.

"You should know better, Bart" the chief knew Bart well having to return him home in his squad car a couple of times, he smacked the stick in his hands as he said "This stuff can be highly dangerous and shouldn't be mishandled."

With that he started starching his back with it and sighing with relief, "Oh, oh! OH! OH MAN! that's better, I thought I'd never be able to get that blasted itch"

Wiggum then took a closer look at the stick at both ends before sighing "No detonators" he said "It's pretty much harmless"

"Then can I have it back?" Bart said quickly

"No can do boy, this baby may not have a detonator but these days you kids can find out stuff on the internet, you can figure out stuff like how to pick locks, how to illegally download video's and how to find out who the Stig is." He said banging the stick in his hands like it was a nightstick "You kids might find out how to detonate it so it's safer if I put it back where it came from" With one great throw the stick landed back in the river with a 'splash.'

"Chief" Lisa said "Shouldn't you take that stick to be detonated by the bomb squad or something?"

"Oh little kids think they know everything" Wiggum said patronisingly ruffling Lisa's hair "Without a detonator it's safe"

BANG!

The stick had just inadvertently exploded sending a spray of water up into the air and now it rained down on all four of them.


	3. The Last Minute Gift

Chapter 2

The Last minute Gift

Homer's car sped down town ignoring red lights, crossing traffic, pedestrians, cyclists he even cut up buses when they indicated to come out of a bus stop while he quickly coming up from behind obviously in a hurry. He clipped the side of one bus as he passed and the driver looked annoyed as Homer's looked in his rear view mirror but his motto still stood, 'if I didn't see it then it's not illegal!'

He pulled into Toy-mania car park, stopped and got out of his car and headed towards the Toy-Mania entrance and went inside and was immediately thrown out again.

_Oh right_ he thought, _the trolley incident_, he turned around and went back to the door and went back inside.

"Please" he pleaded to the shop owner, "I need to get my son a birthday present, please let it pass just this once!"

"Well I suppose we could do something" said someone at the door but when he finished his sentance Homer was thrown out yet again.

Homer had to find a shop which sold this Radio active man thing. There were shops all down the street as far as the eye could see one of them must have that stupid thing. He ran into each of them. The Comic book store where a nerdy fat man behind the counter told him he had sold out, he tried going into a second hand shop and even went to the shopping Mall and went into all the shops, all of them, even Flanders left handed shop but none sold the toy he needed.

Homer quickly dashed up the street trying every shop he could find. What he didn't need was Patty and Selma who were watching him from their car while stopped at the traffic lights trying to get to Bart's party. They said something about Homer being fast for a fat man but he didn't listen he had to find that toy.

He tried a gun shop and interrupted some sort of Mafia gang business. Wide eyed at the gangsters who had just stopped shooting at each other to look who had barged in Homer slowly took a few steps back smiled innocently and closed the door.

He was running out of steam now and he had a stitch in his side he just had to rest, how long had he been doing this? An hour or two? He looked at his watch, it was 7 o'clock! The sun was already going down and the sky began to take on a shade of black, blue, purple with a hint of green that Lisa said was pollution from the nuclear power plant. It reminded him of the ice cream store where he ususally bought an ice cream Sunday on a Sunday.

"Hmm, Ice cream Sunday Aggghhhh!" he drooled again before spotting one shop he hadn't been in before. It looked dilapidated and rusted around the window frames but it was his last hope. The sign outside read "International House of Mojo, home of all mystical artefacts, Frogs eyes on sale, please note if you wish to buy polyjuice potion you may be asked for proof of age and identity."

Homer pushed open the door and went inside, it was dark and musty the shelves were crammed full of old books and creepy looking things it also and reeked of cat pee, the reason for this smell was obvious as a black cat came around the corner and sat in the litter box at the far end of the shop.

"Hey it's impolite to stare!" the cat said fixing Homer with its emerald green eyes

"Oh sorry" said Homer shielding his eyes and turning around, cat's needed their privacy too, even talking cats, _hey wait a minute there's no such thing as a talking cat_, he opened his eyes again and yelped in surprise, he was face to face with an aged woman who looked like a drooping sack of bones and skin. "AH! Witch!" He took a step back pointing a trembling accusing finger at the old woman.

"Witch? I just work here, now how many I help you?" she asked in what sounded like a witchy type voice, Homer lowered his arm slowly feeling slightly embarrassed at his scream but also half scared if this was a real witch. "You don't sell the errm" what was that thing called again "the new Radio thingy?"

"Radioactive man action set?" she suggested

"Yeah, how did you know?" Homer asked amazed

"I can see the future I sensed you were coming, Homer J. Simpson" she said in a mystical almost spooky tone of a typical fortune teller "you are about to open a new chapter in the life of your family, there will be heart ache, mischief and…"

"BOOOORING" he said turning to exit the shop.

"Wait don't go!" she said appearing in front of him again "I'm sure we can find you something, even if I don't have the item you require, many come in and find more then they bargained for"

"ooOOOO" said Homer excitedly "More then a bargain?"

"Exactly" she said as she gently pushed Homer away from the exit, satisfied he wasn't going to leave in a hury she disappeared behind the counter and brought out a beer bottle "I can see you're a man who likes bear, what about this? The bottomless bear bottle you can drink from this for years"

"OOOoooo, Bottomless bear bottle?" he said, reaching out "at last you witches do something useful" he snatched it up and tried to taste the cool refreshing beer, but nothing but stale air entered his mouth "Hey, this things empty"

"Naturally" she said snatching it back off him "You have to fill it up first" she replaced the bottle on the counter next to a tray full of cup cakes.

"OOOOoo" he squealed excitedly, "Cup cakes!" they looked old and stale but that didn't stop Homer grabbing a few and shovelling some down his throat.

"Ah yes" she said "those are cup cakes with a very special curse on it, anyone taking even a nibble will balloon up!"

She stood there for a moment watching Homer waiting for him to inflate like a balloon as he took another bite out of on the cup cake he had in his hand and chewed it, Homer just stood there looking at her with an almost bewildered expression on his face at why the witch was just staring at him, his stomach suddenly complained about something and rumbled but nothing happened apart from that.

"Hmm." She said as if considering an experiment which hadn't gone to plan, she eyed Homers already bloated shape "Probably for the best they don't work" she then directed him towards what looked like an old TV "This might interest you, a cursed TV which shows exactly what the view does not want to see, perfect for getting back at an enemy"

She reached forward and turned the dial that switched it on, nothing came up on the dusty screen for a minute but as it began to warm up a picture came onto the screen and the audio faded in from the silence.

"Okay now go through the motions, one two three four and one two three four, feel the burn, burn those calories…"

"AHHH!" Homer squealed, lifting the stale cupcake he was carrying and eating off of into the air "Die you monster!" he shouted as he threw the cup cake at the TV, it impacted and disintegrated leaving the TV unharmed. The witch turned it off before Homer did anything else to it. It had shown the worst program Homer had ever seen, it was horrible, one which scared him more then the Ring, a work out fitness video for fat people. "No one's stealing my precious calories!" he said shaking his angry fists at the now silent TV.

"Hmm a tough customer" the old hag said as Homer realised his hunt for that stupid Radioactive man toy was fast running out. But nowhere sold them and the party was already happening back at home as he stood here looking at empty bottomless bear bottles and stale cup cakes. He'd just have to go back and admit to Bart he didn't get him the one thing he wanted, and this would probably mean no loving with Marge tonight. His shoulders slumped as he made his way back towards the shop exit.

"Wait don't go!" said the old hag who had managed to stand in front of him again blocking his way as she held her arms out to stop him "How are you doing that?" Homer asked but the witch just kept talking, "I can see you are only interested in rare items…"

"I just need something for my eleven year old son give me something!" he pleaded he was getting desperate now.

"Ah" said the woman "Get into much mischief does your young boy, Bart Simpson?"

Homer nodded, that wasn't an original prediction he had to admit as Bart's antics were practically world famous in Springfield.

"Then perhaps you would be most wise…" said the old woman reaching under her robes "…to consider…"

"Whatever you've got under there it's not suitable for a kid" he interrupted before adding "Is it?"

".. to consider…" she started again annoyance clear in her voice as she quickly pulled something from her robes "…this!"

From her robes she pulled out something solid and almost boat like in shape only with three holes in its keel, it was made of wood with green pealing paint. It was a mask, an old mask.

"This was discovered in the river last night, everyone who has passed through those doors since has refused to buy such a unique item" she said holding it out for Homer to get a good look at.

It didn't look like it was of anything in particular its eyes looked wide and staring and it had a mouth with a subtle smile to it. It looked like it was fashioned directly from a lump of wood cut from a tree because you could see the ridges and rings even through the paintwork. It looked like it had once been completely green but over time the paint had chipped and pealed revealing the natural brown wood underneath and moss had started growing in some of the wood crevices. From the top of the mask and moving down between its eye holes was a thick metal bar which stopped where a nose on a person would've been and was held on by four rivets arranged in one neat line down the mask. The top of the metal bar had a strange circular pattern on it but what was just visible was a strangely shaped letter, L.

Homer looked again at the expression this mask had on its face, he had seen that expression somewhere before he thought but couldn't quite place it, then he pictured Bart in his head wondering if he would like it, then he realised something the mask was in a similar shape to Barts's face and that mischievous look on it looked like Bart as well.

"That looks like Bart" he said out loud, this could be the perfect replacement gift for his boy "How much I'll take it!"

"Ah, but I must warn you, this mask came into my possession and…" she said stepping around him which wasn't easy giving his bulk, and tried to sound spooky, she let her head hover next to his before continuing "…like all things in my shop the Mask here has… a terrible curse!" she moved away still trying to sound spooky "the wearer of the Mask becomes…"

"I said –How - much - I'll – take – it!" Homer was becoming impatient with this hag.

"I'd usually say a 100,000 dollars for something this powerful" she said holding it up "How much was the item you seek?"

"74 dollars 99 cents" Homer replied reaching into his pocket and pulling out his wallet and counting out 75 dollars which was quickly snatched out of his hands

"Done" said the hag tossing the mask into Homers hands "Just get that damn curse away from my shop" she then began looking at the notes and coins Homer had given her and was biting into them trying to see if they were fakes.

Homer opened the door to leave the shop "Crazy old lady" he said to himself as he came to a grinding halt. Something had just registered in his brain, there one minute, gone the next. No wait it was coming back again. He turned around and looked across the street at the shop opposite, a few doors down was the one place he loved to spend his time more then in bed at home or watching TV on the couch, Moes tavern.

He licked his lips, he'd given 75 dollars to the old hag and he really needed to get home to the party, but he still had money and the time for a beer or six. Excitedly he walked across the road ready to drink like a fish.

* * *

Marge looked at the clock, it was 8:30 pm, the party had started at 5 and Bart and Lisa turned up at 6, they had waited an hour in semi-darkness waiting for them to come home and when they finally did they all shouted surprise though Bart didn't look very surprised at all.

Since then everything had become very hectic, she was preparing food, juice, finishing the cakes, she hurriedly got Bart his cake and presents and had to organise games for them to play to keep them from tearing the house apart. Though she set the games up they didn't always stick to the rules and were quickly coming up with other games of their own.

Patty and Selma had turned up and so had Grandpa Simpson, but there was still no sign of Homer himself. She quickly poured several glasses of juice for several waiting kids and they rushed off without even saying thank you.

Patty and Selma were grumbling about how bad the party was and refused to help Marge with anything as they took great puffs of their lit cigarettes, though they were her sisters they really did get on her nerves sometimes. Lisa was busy with something else in her room she didn't know what and Maggie was wanted feeding.

"Don't worry Marge" said Patty as Marge tried feeding Maggie her baby food. "You'll know when Homer comes home"

"Yeah!" said Selma "when he's here his stomping feet will make the earth shake!" They both sniggered at that thought.

Marge looked back at the clock again and the same question entered her mind, where was Homer?

* * *

Where was he? Homer asked himself, all he could see were bright white lights flashing past his face, a screeching noise and a loud muffled beep. Homer remembered leaving the creepy shop and he remembered going to Moes for a beer or six or twelve.

Moes was a tavern where Homer liked to go drinking, it was a pretty dark bar with four seats around the bar area all which were usually taken with regularly customers which 'yours truly' was. There were tables at one side of the room with seats curved around them and in the middle was a pool table with the queue ball missing.

The place was run by Moe, a troll of a man with a heavy brow, lizard lips, beady eyes, fish snout and short curly hair. He was also the bar man and the only person who worked there because he was tight with money and needed to be because he always got the same four customers. Lenny and Carl from the power plant, Barney Gumball who was a recovering alcoholic gone on a relapse and of course Homer Simpson himself. He did get other customers who came in from time to time but they weren't regulars like the four sitting at the bar.

He remembered Moe got him one drink, and when that happened. Oh man when that cool refreshing beer touched his lips it opened the flood gates, he had another drink and another and another. Now he didn't know what time it was, where he was and didn't remember where he lived.

He looked down, he could tell he was sitting at least and in his lap was that very mask he bought from the creepy old woman, _good_ he thought, at least he didn't lose it. His hands were also resting on something that felt curved and it was humming and vibrating, it was also round and leathery and… some bright lights appeared in the middle of his vision... the rear view mirror. That's it! He remembered where he was now! He was driving! He had several beers got back to his car and was driving home.

* * *

Homers car sped past a waiting police car which was stationary at the side of the road. Inside were two of Springfield's finest, Police Chief Clancy Wiggum and his partner Lou.

Lou was a tall thin man with dark skin with a slight mustache on his upper lip, he was holding up a speed camera out the window of the patrol car which bleeped loudly as a purple four door raced past.

"Hey Chief" Lou said to his partner "Chief!" he said again to Wiggum who was in the drivers seat cap pulled over his eyes sleeping, "Chief" he said again and Wiggum woke up with a start. "Hey, chief that car is doing 120 in a 30 mile an hour zone!" Lou said.

"Oh" said Wiggum rubbing his eyes and pushing his cap back he signed deeply with annoyance "Criminals have no respect for decency, they always have to commit a crime at an unsociable hour"

Wiggum started the car and revved the engine as Lou switched on the flashing lights and the siren. The squad car sped off in pursuit of the speeding offender.

"This is car 101 in pursuit of a purple four door" Lou said into their radio, the car ahead was swerving from one lane to the other with a screech of its stressed tires. Lou tried to get a look at the registration plate on the back. But there was no registration plate, instead someone had painted with red pain in a childish scrawl a replacement. "Registration…" he said straining his eyes to see the writing clearly "H-O-M-E-R-S-C-A-R"

"Hey that's my job?" said Wiggum who still had both hands on the wheel but wasn't watching the road ahead.

"Chief you're driving" said Lou

"Yeah, but I'm the Chief" Wiggum complained glancing back at the road "It's my job to answer the radio"

"Chief it is illegal to use a mobile phone and drive"

"Does it look like a cell phone to you?" Wiggum said as he lifted one hand off the wheel and wrapped the microphone around his head. "This is police Chief Clancy Wiggum in pursuit"

"You go get those bad men!" came a childish voice from the radio

"Ralphy?" Ralph was Wiggums nine year old son, a sweet kid, a sweet 'special' kid who people had told him was a little short on the up take.

"Listen Ralphy" Wiggum said adopting a soft speaking voice as if he was afraid to upset his boy "put walkie-talkie back where you found him and go back to bed will you, okay Ralphy?"

"Okay" Ralph said "Night-night walkie-talkie"

* * *

Homer meanwhile was having trouble, _why did they have to make the roads out of jelly?_ He asked himself. He looked in the rear view mirror and saw blue and red flashing lights and a very loud noise that rose in pitch and then fell. "Today's music is terrible" he said slurring his words as he bent down taking his eyes off the road to turn the already silent radio off.

Suddenly he hit something, he jerked his head back "I'M AWAKE, I'M AWAKE!" he was saying as his car fell off the wobbly road and landed on an even more wobbly country road with no lights.

What Homer couldn't see was he'd just come off the road onto a twisty country road which he was plowing straight through and was about to crash directly into a tree, a crash that would ultimately kill him. Just before the impact a bump caused the Mask in his lap to leap up onto the steering wheel facing down. He could barely make out a soft green glow coming from it.

The car slammed into the tree with a thundering crash of metal mangling together. The seatbelts stopped Homer from flying out the window though the impact itself was incredibly painful and probably caused much more serious damage to his organs especially the brain, it was already in such a state that he couldn't make heads or tails of what had just happened to him.

"D'oh" he said gently, the air bags suddenly deployed a little too late propelling the green mask onto Homer's face. "D'OH" he shouted as his head flew back from the impact and hit the head rest which snapped off under the impact "D'OH" he shouted again.

He remembered thinking this was the worst pain ever, crashing. The air bag started to deflate in front of him like a balloon, but he then noticed another feeling. His face felt slightly numb but from what little feeling he could get it felt like someone was giving his head a hug. He reached up and felt something soft like rubber with many grooves in it, the thing was also wriggling on his face and was slowly wrapping itself around his balled head.

"Aw, good mask" he said half drunk half dazed "giving Homers hurt head a hug and kiss" Homer began to loose consciousness and his body began to die, he felt the Mask completely encase his head. The last thought he had was….

'I wish I hadn't taken a leak in it back there'

Then everything started changing. Everything began to fade out to black but then came back with a bright green flash. Everything he saw began mixing together as if passing his face at an incredible speed. He felt warm, he felt charged and on fire like someone was giving him an electric shock only it wasn't unpleasant or painful. Everything was changing and now everything didn't make the slightest bit of sense anymore.


	4. What Revenge Means to Me

**Authors notes:**

I thought long and hard about how Homer's Mask persona would act and I decided it was obvious. He'd be almost exactly the same only now his altered personality means whatever used to hold him back as plain Homer Simpson either mentally or physically would be gone, he'd have super powers, and his 'Mask persona' would consist of his major drives, his usual hunger and alcoholism as well as his short temper and anger which is blown up, all of which would drive the Mask.

There are also elements of the original mask in there as well.

Enjoy

* * *

Chapter 3

What Revenge means to me…

Police Chief Wiggum and Lou's squad car slowed to a roll following their drunk driver's erratic path where the vehicle had left the road and crashed, the battered car was perfectly illuminated by their own car's head lamps and as far as they could see there was no movement coming from inside. They unbuckled their seat belts and were about to get out when suddenly a bright light flared up from inside the car and they were treated to a spectacular light show.

From the windows of the crashed purple car came bright green light rays which shifted position rapidly. Sparks erupted from the front of the car and what looked like green electricity began sparking and flowing around the outside.

There was also a great gust of wind being blown from the car, a gust which Wiggum and Lou could see in the movement of the grass between the two vehicles. A whirling sound also came from damaged vehicle as if something was spinning around really, really fast.

The green lights died down, the wind stopped and everything fell dark again. The only light coming from that car now was from one single head lamp which was still working. What had just happened?

Wiggum opened his car door and took out a flash light and gun from his holster, Lou also took out a light and weapon from his belt holster as he gently closed the passenger side door.

"Did the fourth of July come early this year" Wiggum said as they slowly approached the car being wary of any electrical discharge. What caused that light show they didn't know, there could be fireworks or something in the trunk but they'll have to let forensics have a look at the car to see if they can explain what had just happened. Wiggum went up to the drivers' side of the car. He holstered his weapon and took out a note pad and pen as he bent over slightly to peer through the drivers' window.

"Do you know how fast you were going back there pal?" he asked causally to the man in the drivers seat who sat in shadow.

"Uhh, I think he's dead Chief" Lou commented

"Oh so you think you're a doctor now as well as the Chief of Police, Lou?" the chief asked testily.

"We're not going through this again Chief" Lou said "anyway crashing into a tree at 125 miles an hour he's clearly dead"

"Oh yeah, glad you're not my doctor, this mans clearly alive" he said gesturing towards the figure hidden in the shadows of the car.

"Get out of here chief!" Lou couldn't believe someone could crash a car at 125 miles an hour and survive, it just wasn't possible. He walked over to the car door and looked inside no one could possibly have survived that. He shone his flash light into the car to get a good look at the body. Something green came out from the darkness of the cars interior and swallowed his whole hand holding the light up to his wrist! Whatever it was it was moist and warm inside and it began sucking at the flash light in his hand.

Lou let go of the flash light and tried in vain to pull his hand free but whatever it was it wasn't letting go. The flash light which was still inside it was illuminating whatever this thing was from the inside. Wiggum shone his light on the green thing and Wiggum and Lou realised what it was, it was a face, a head! Its mouth was clamped around Lou's hand and was still trying to suck on him. The flash light inside made it glow a scary shade of green and he could see its brain and eyes through the head! He felt its teeth bite down on his wrist but only gently as if it was unsure what it had in there. Lou put his left foot on the door of the vehicle and pushed with all his might but the green head wasn't going to let go.

Wiggum raised his gun and pressed it to the green head's temple "No one becomes a zombie on my watch!" he fired a round into the head.

What happened next neither Wiggum nor Lou could believe. The bullet impacted the face and caused a dent in the head, like if you strike a metal sheet. Only the dent kept collapsing in on itself as the bullet pushed its way through and it pulled the face inward like when you poked an inflated balloon. A long green streak came out the back of the head with the sound of stretching elastic, it managed to get a good few inches out before it shot back into his head and the face snapped back into place, and it still didn't let go of Lous' arm. There was no wound on the thing's face either and it was clearly still alive as the eyes on it, which were quite large with red irises, turned to look at them.

"Ooouuuuch!" it said in a slow voice as if it were only half awake.

As it spoke it had to let go of Lou's hand and he snapped his wrist back out of its mouth, he fell back undignified onto the floor, he inspected his left hand which was now covered in saliva and had a set of teeth marks around the wrist which thankfully weren't bleeding. He got to his feet, took a step back and drew his gun in both his right hand and saliva covered left hand.

The green thing began to seep through the car door as if the thing didn't have any bones or was made of thick custard or as if it were the blob! It began oozing towards them and Lou and Wiggum stood back as the green blob man began to form into a shape, a human form.

"What the hell is this thing?" Lou asked as the green goo thing solidified into a man, a fat man. He had a big green head with a rubber sort of texture to it, big red eyes which regarded them with more curiosity then anything else. Sprouting from his head were long locks of brown hair which looked more like it was just one big piece of plastic shaped into hair like you'd have on a Halloween costume.

The man belched and a bright light came from his mouth which vanished the minute he closed it again. "Hehe, that was a nice light lunch" he said smiling broadly. His teeth were also massive, too big to even fit inside his mouth or talk with but somehow he managed it.

"Freeze zombie face!" said Wiggum holding his gun to fire at the thing.

"Umm, Chief it this is a zombie what do we do about it?" he asked, uncertainty in his voice, they'd never encountered a zombie before what where they going to do?

"I don't know, Lou" Wiggum complained "Whoever wrote the police manual didn't think details on zombie combat would be necessary, the fools!"

"Aim for the head, that movie about zombies always say shoot for the head"

Lou and Wiggum took aim and fired at the green headed freak, bang, bang, bang came the shots several bullets entered its head. But it stood there taking every shot, every bullet and didn't even seem to be phased, click, click, click, their guns were empty but still the thing hadn't fallen.

A crunching noise came from the creature and his mouth began moving as if chewing something, it then opened its mouth to reveal a row of small metal objects clenched between its large teeth, they were the bullets they had just fired! All of them that were fired right into the creatures head. It then let the bullets fall back into his mouth and he continued chewing them and with one loud gulp he swallowed the lot.

"Hmm, plenty of iron, Agghhhh!" he drooled so much it looked like it was raining in his mouth.

Lou and Wiggum took a step back "What now?" Lou said

Wiggum threw his revolver at the thing which just opened its mouth as wide as a dust bin lid and snapped his jaws around the gun and swallowed it without chewing.

"Hungry" said the thing holding its stomach which was aching with an audible drawn out squashing noise "Homer, hungry"

"Hey chief I think it means us!" Lou said in alarm

"LET'S GET OUT OF HERE!" Lou and Wiggum raced off as fast as they could to get away from the thing. They climbed back into the squad car, Wiggum jammed the keys in the ignition and the engine came to life with a roar. Lou bucked his seat belt and watched the green headed man just stand there, looking at them like 'they' were crazy as their car sped off as fast as they could leaving 'it' behind in their dust.

If Homer was at all curious about what had happened to him he wasn't showing it. The last thing he remembered was hitting his head three times on the head rest and steering wheel then that mask had fallen on his face. The next thing he knew he was here, in a wreck of a car and incredibly hungry with two policeman firing guns at him.

He just looked at the running cops as they climbed into their squad car and drove off in a panic. Cops had do-nuts and he was hungry, so hungry. It was odd but he felt different he felt wide awake and he felt charged, full of energy, he felt sober. How had that happened when a couple of moments ago he was dead drunk? He reached into his jacket pocket… he was wearing a jacket? …and pulled out from one of the small pockets, a full length dress mirror with a stand on rotating casters.

He set it down on the grass not for one moment thinking that taking a large mirror from a small pocket this was the least bit strange and looked at his reflection. He saw a man with red eyes, a big green head and massive teeth.

"AH!" he screamed at the sight of the green rubber mask "The blob monster's got my face!" he grabbed at the green thing and pulled with all his might to get it off but the green blob only stretched out andt so did all his facial features with it.

"OWWwww" he screamed "this is the worst pain ever!" he complained as he lost his grip on the green thing and his hands shot forward knocking the mirror. The top half fell backwards as the bottom half came up and whacked him between the legs. He had just reconsidered his last statement.

He let out a yelp of pain that caused his fake hair to stand up on end, his teeth to fly out of his mouth like a pair of dentures where they hung in mid air a few feet away and yammered together making a chattering noise. At the same time his eyeballs had also popped out from their sockets stood in mid air. Then both his teeth and eye's fell to the ground, as they hit the floor his eye balls rolled away.

"Huh? What the?" he said awkwardly with his teeth-less mouth, he felt his face for his eyes and teeth before understanding dawned on him. He then started feeling around for his eyeballs which were on the ground somewhere. He could still see though those eyes and he saw his body lumbering towards them, it was an awkward experience but he half acted as if he was used to it, though he didn't question why.

His body knelt down and tried to pick up his eyeballs, feeling his hands grab something solid and round his body shot them towards his empty eye sockets.

"OW!" he watched his body scream from his eyeballs which were still on the floor, his body had just picked up a rock and a small hedgehog which was now rolling around inside his empty eye socket before escaping. The rock also fell from his eye socket and landed on the ground.

He then felt around looking for his eyes again when he felt something narrow, curved and slightly wet, his teeth! He picked them up but this time made sure he could see that they were his teeth before placing them back in his mouth. When he removed his hands he hadn't noticed he'd placed them in upside down.

"Oh, where are my eyes!" he saw his body complain as it held out his hands out in front of him and took another step forward. He lost the sight in one of his eyes suddenly and he heard a clear audible pop and squelching noise under his left foot then as he placed the other foot down he lost the sight in the other eye and he heard another pop and squelch.

"Uh oh" he said realising he'd just stepped on them. He wanted to panic because he was technically blind now but he somehow knew instinctively how to get them back. He put his hand over his nose closed both nostrils took a deep breath and blew hard into his closed nose. His eyes came back into existence inside his eye sockets with a loud pop.

"Eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth" he quipped as he straightening up the mirror and looking back at his reflection.

"Oh, that's me" he understood this much at least, he looked almost exactly the same apart from the fake brown plastic hair do from the 80's, large teeth which were in upside down a problem which was quickly fixed by taking them out and refitting them the right way up. He also had a pair of red eyes and his head was covered in green rubbery skin which only went as far as his neck where a neat line showed where the green rubbery skin stopped and the normal flesh of his neck started. Also his eyes had a mixed look of anger and mischievous. He was also missing his ears.

At first he feared they may have fallen off onto the floor with his mouth and eyes but when he reached up to feel for them he still had feeling where his ears should be, they were just underneath the green rubber, _oh well_, he decided. _At least no one will flick his ear's when they're cold again_.

His clothes were also different, he wasn't wearing his usual short sleeve white shirt, blue pants and dull grey shoes, he now wore what looked like a bikers jacket, bikers trousers boots and so forth, on his shirt were the words 'Feed me!' painted in read letters.

It was strange but he felt a sense of detachment from what he was seeing and perceiving as if he were drunk, oh how he wished he had a beer right now. He could just go for one but there wasn't a beer around here for miles and Moes would be closed by now.

He looked back at his car, it was a wreck, the axel will be all bent out of shape and it would be completely un-drivable. Homer held up his hands keeping his fingers closed and thumbs extended he let them connect at the tips like someone viewing how a picture would look.

"Well now isn't this a picture post card for safety belts" he said, he walked up to the broken vehicle, it's strange but his movements didn't feel the same either, they felt smooth and fluid.

He looked inside the damaged car "Who's the sucker who crashed this junk heap?" he stuck his head inside the broken window, on the dash there was a sticker which said in childishly scrawled letters "Property of Homer J. Simpson, if found please return to address, No Reward!"

"D'oh!" he came his curse, "Oh well" he said rubbing his hands together so fast they started to burn red hot "I can fix this in a jiffy"

He leapt up into the air as far as he could go, which was ten times his normal height and landed piercing the dented metal roof of the car and sat in the drivers seat. He buckled up, placed one hand on the steering wheel and used his other to jam the keys into the ignition. He saw green sparks fly from his fingertips through the key and steering wheel causing the engine to roar back to life as the entire car began to spark and glow.

He watched as if what occurred before him was all completely normal and mundane, the car itself began to change shape. The steering wheel in front of him became a pair of handle bars and the peddles became feet rests, the four wheels changed to form three and the entire body of the car opened up, the roof pealed back like a tin opener, the doors folded away neatly into the chaise of the car which also slowly became a set of twisted, polished metal pipes, the passenger side seat began to lower itself to the ground as the body of the car began to form a egg like shape around it. The bonnet split apart and began merging with the rest of the body work, the engine also began shifting its position so it was underneath Homer's seat which began raising up away from the ground. Finally the dull plastic dash board began reforming into a slim black body which sat on top of a big polished chrome engine. Homers entire car had reformed into a black motor bike and side car.

Holding up his left hand a pair of black sunglasses appeared out of nowhere and he placed them over his red eyes and on his green nose. He pulled on his handlebars so the bike did a standing wheelie as he revved the throttle causing him to spin the bike to face back towards the road and with a screech of the tires sped off into the night.

The squad car sped as fast as it could away from that green walking corpse. Wiggum was in the drivers seat and was driving for his life. He didn't know what the hell that thing was but he sure didn't want to hang around to find out.

"What the heck was that thing chief?" Lou asked

"I don't know but I tell you one thing, it ain't here to see the northern lights" he his voice took on a more serious tone.

"Errm Chief that doesn't make sense"

"Hey, it was all I could think of! Don't rush me!" Wiggum winced as if Lou were about to hit him though of course Lou wasn't. Wiggum was just scared, they were both scared. All their years on the force and they had never seen anything so crazy in their lives, that man should've been dead the minute he slammed into that tree, he also should've been dead when they shot him a dozen times in the head but he somehow was still standing.

They were doing 90 miles on 70mph road but right now they couldn't afford to stay to the speed limits if they wanted to get away from that thing.

Knock, knock!

There was someone knocking outside passenger window, the person was sitting on a big black bike and wore clothes which made him look like a member of a biker gang. Lou wound down his window and before he could ask what the problem was he yelped in surprise, it was the thing!

"You guy's got any beer? Or do-nuts?" it asked lifting down its pair of sun glasses showing its unnatural red eyes, Loud leaned away from the passenger window not taking his eyes off the green faced man.

"You may take our brains zombie but you'll never take our do-nuts" Wiggum said as turned wheel of the car to rammed right into the bike

"What the?" said the creature as its bike skidded off the road and slammed into a telephone pole on the sidewalk, the bike exploded with a loud audible 'd'oh!' following it.

Wiggum drove on as fast as he could. They should go back and inspect the damage but Lou took one look at the frightened look on Wiggum's face and they both decided, 'let someone else do it.'

"He won't be bothering us again" Wiggum half said with confidence the other half with slight hint of fear. Where the heck did it get that bike? Did the creature attack and kill someone for it? It had taken several bullets to the head what else was it capable of? At least it was dead, nothing could survive an explosion like that.

Lou lay back in his seat took his cap off and breathed a sign of relief, he just listened to the static of the radio and the hum of the cars engine. But wait there was another hum, a hum that sounded like someone munching on something.

"Hey, Lou quit eating all the do-nuts" said Wiggum not taking his eyes off the road.

"That's not me chief" Lou said "I left the do-nuts on the back seat"

Wiggum's face went slightly white and his eyes went wide as he slowed the car down a little. He reached up to his rear view mirror, hands slightly trembling and tilted the mirror so he could see directly into the back seat. He was met with the sight of a big green head and red eyes.

"Ummmmmm, sprinkles and jam filling, AAgggghhh!" it was drooling again.

That thing was in the back seat! How did it get there? It was in the car and it was eating all their do-nuts! It lifted another do-nut to its face and munched down on it like an animal. Wiggum just had to look away in disgust, he admitted he was guilty of eating do-nuts sometimes in disgusting ways but that was too animalistic and too disgusting to watch.

He then noticed it wasn't wearing a seat belt, _good!_ Wiggum thought as he slammed on the breaks as hard as he could. The car began screeching to a halt as Wiggum felt a dull impact in the back of his seat when the thing went head first and splattered against the car protective wire mesh wall. The creature, thing, it… Whatever it was broke up like it was made of clay doe and began oozing into the front of the car. The car stopped and gave a sharp jerk as it stalled due to it not being in the correct gear.

Wiggum looked down at the large oozing mass of remains that the 'thing' now was in the middle of the seat.

"Rule one zombie guy, always wear safety belts!"

They'd finally killed it Lou thought with a sigh of relief, it was dead after a tree impact, after all the bullets they fired at it, now it died simply because it forgot to buckle its safety belts.

"**Remember as the driver you are responsible for any passengers' safety****"**

Came a voice which sounded like one of their safety videos

"**If you don't want to end up like our friend here, remember buckle up, stay safe and live"**

"Lou quit fooling around" Wiggum said starting to get annoyed as he put the car back into gear and prepared to start the engine again.

"Umm, Chief…" Loud said with a hint of quivering to his voice, the meaning of it was all too clear to Wiggum. Loud hadn't made that voice. Wiggum looked down at the radio but there was nothing on but static.

Wiggum's optimistic thought of the creature being dead was crushed in an instant as he herd a slight gurgling sound. He slowly turned his head to see the mess that was the 'thing' The pile of goo in the front seat begin to reform, back into the creature again, it formed its body, head and arms before solidifying its fingers, legs nose and facial features. The goo had also solidified into his biker clothes and somehow now possessed another pair of black sun glasses which were over his eyes.

"I'm Back!" he said in a Terminator style voice its eyes glowing red under the sun glasses. In a panic Lou and Wiggum struggled to undo their seat belts. Was this thing a real Terminator from the movie?

"Car 101, Chief Wiggum" came a voice over the crackle of the radio "we're following a stolen Duff truck on the same road as your drunk driver, if you've booked him we could really use some backup, be warned the suspect is armed and highly dangerous!"

"Nah! Lets put something else one" said the green man as he pulled a cassette out of his jacket and pushed it into the radio despite there not being any cassette player in it. Loud rock music came from all around the car with no apparent source because the only source of sound should be the one speaker in the radio.

After a few minutes of struggling they had both disconnected their seat belts and managed to wrenched open the doors of their car and got out, running for their lives as fast as their legs could carry them leaving the green headed man alone in the squad car.

"Ah, you pigs are no fun!" he said as he got out shouting "Hey, wait for me!.

Neither Lou nor Wiggum got far, only a few short steps when a sort of net shot out from nowhere and began wrapping around both of them forcing them back to back. The pair fell to the ground in this strange net which felt like it was made of a sticky, rubbery substance.

Without warning they were hoisted upside down as the green faced man began hauling them up another telephone mast by the strange web like net, as he pulled them higher and higher into the air, he sang...

"Spider pigs, spider pigs, does whatever spider pigs do! Can they swing from a web? No they can't, they're pigs. Look out here comes the spider pigs!"

What was this thing going to do with them? Wiggum wondered, eat their brains? Drink their blood? Kill them?

The 'thing' tied off the web against the next telephone pole a few hindered yards away, he began to approach them again. Wiggum couldn't help but look scared and Lou didn't know what to feel except fear. This creature should've died several times already but it was still coming, still going. What did it even want with them?

His leather boots creaked as they hit the tarmac and came closer and closer. Creak, creak, creak, creak.

"Now look, I know we tried to kill you" said Wiggum in a hurried voice "but maybe we got off on the wrong foot, you know!" he tried to laugh but couldn't hide the fear in it and being upside down didn't help. "Maybe we'll let you off the charges of reanimating your corpse and humiliating two respectable police officers of the Springfield police…"

Whatever he was going to say next was stopped as the creature put his fore finger to Wiggum's lips and gently hushed him. As it reached into its jacket pocket, Wiggum winched expecting it to bring out a gun. Its hand left its jacket and… it wasn't holding a gun or a knife or any sort of weapon. It was holding a pie, freshly baked by the steam coming off it.

The creature cocked its arms back and splat! The pie impacted Wiggum's face leaving a large amount of purple goo on his face. It hadn't really hurt that much since it was only made of pie, but he'd kept his eyes closed to stop the stuff getting in and some of the pie had entered his mouth, it was blackberry flavour.

The last person to throw pies as a form of attack was some crazy guy a couple of years back calling himself Pieman, they never did find out who that guy really was but this guy obviously wasn't him, only imitating, a copy cat.

The man rotated them around and pulled another pie from his jacket. Lou was now facing him and saw the baked confection in his hand. Who was this guy some sort of clown? He cocked his arm back and prepared to throw.

From the distance came headlamps from the dark road, _rescue at last_ thought Lou as a large truck passed them its horn blazing. The green creature was standing in the middle of the road and didn't get out of the way in time he was completely squashed by the truck. The rig didn't slow down as its large heavy wheels rolled over the green man, as it drew level with the hanging cops they could see a sign on the side which said it contained Duff beer.

The rig didn't stop not even to see what two cops were doing hanging upside down from a telephone wire with pie on their faces, it just moved on leaving them dangling in mid air and a great green stain on the floor where the thing had been flattened and imprinted in the ground as flat as a pan cake.

The whirling of police sirens followed and several police vehicles zoomed straight past over the flat green headed man in pursuit of the Duff truck. Lou shouted for help but every single police vehicle passed them continuing the pursuit.

As the sirens died down again and disappeared into the distance Lou returned his attention to the green headed man. He looked really cartoon-ish now as he lay there in one piece flattened out onto the floor. He must be dead surely, there was no way this thing could…

Its eyes opened and budged out as its arms and legs started to curl like a piece of paper that had been rolled up. Its legs rolled up over its head and made contact with the ground just above its head and with a peeling sound pealed the rest of itself off the road. It tried to stand up straight and was just about managing it considering its flat feet, it looked at where the truck was disappearing into the distance and Loud could see he was as flat as a piece of paper.

"Beer!" it screamed and tried to take a step forward only to fall flat on his face 'd'oh' came an annoyed grunt, it tried to get back to its feet. Its nose suddenly bounced back into existence and it reached its flat fingers up and held its nose with one hand and stuck the thumb of his other hand into his mouth and blew into it and strange enough he started to re-inflate. Was this guy was like a cartoon made real as his body began to reshape itself. His head came back with a pop and his hair stood to attention on his head as his legs arms and fingers regained shape until he was back to normal. But he didn't stop there he kept blowing more and more into his thumb and his body just got bigger and bigger and rounder like he was a ball.

More sirens and another police car came around the corner to join the pursuit of the Duff truck, its bright light illuminated the inflated green headed man who now looked like a hot air balloon with a tiny head on top hands and feet but no arms.

It looked down at it's over inflated body and squirmed finding out it couldn't move, it only had time to mutter one word "Uh Oh" the squad car slammed its breaks on and tried to screech to a halt but it couldn't lose speed fast enough. It impacted the balloon man and he bounced away down the street. A rupture appeared at his chest and as he began to deflate and he shot up into the air and flew all around like a balloon would when you blew it up but didn't tie a knot in it. The green man, travelling at hundreds of miles an hour in the direction the Duff truck was travelling, it screamed at the top of its lungs "Woooh Hoooo! For once police actually are useful!"

The house was a mess, cake crumbs and paper littered the floor, some of the crumbs had been stepped on and 'smushed' into the carpet which would make the job of removing them all the harder, glasses and cups had been left all over the place but thankfully Bart's birthday was over and all the children were leaving.

Lisa had come down stairs to view the damage. It had been a hectic night a night not improved by some of Bart's pranks, his first was sabotaging the bobbing for apples game in the back yard by dropping a rare apple shaped pair he'd found in the fruit basket into the water. Pairs unlike applies did not float as they were more dense, so the pair sank to the bottom of the barrel. Thus Lisa wasn't fooled when Bart tried to get her to bob for it, but because she wouldn't do it he got Milhouse to try, a prank which nearly killed him as his head struggled to bite the 'apple' and breath at the same time.

That was the worst and only prank of the night that Lisa wanted to see, she had instead decided to skip the rest of the 'fun' by going back to her room and do something else, like read or write in her diary or something. But when she got up stairs she found someone asleep in her bed. It was Ralph Wiggum who had apparently just climbed into bed after 'walkie-talkie' told him to do so. 'Walkie-talkie' was a police radio Bart had somehow talked Ralph into bringing to the party so they could listen into their radio broadcasts. When Ralph and the others were using it however Ralph opened his mouth to wish his daddy luck but when the voice came back and told him to go to bed he thought the walkie-talkie itself was speaking to him and did as it said and went straight to bed.

It took her awhile to convince Ralph to leave her room but she managed to convince Ralph he should sleep in a boy's room not a girl's and so she sent him off to Bart's bedroom to sleep in his bed. Something she knew Bart wouldn't be happy about.

Ralph had just gone home with his mother and now the only people left in the house were the members of the Simpson family. Grandpa Simpson had fallen asleep in the chair in the living room and remained there for the whole party even as little kids pocked him with a stick to see if he was dead or not.

Bart had gone to bed satisfied that his day of pranks had been fulfilled. Patty and Selma just stood around muttering how awful the party was as they smoked cigarette after cigarette and drunk glass after glass of wine all the time whining themselves, while mom just went around cleaning up after the mess Bart's friends made and by the look of it now she was going to be here all night.

Patty and Selma had already left the party before any of the others, probably because their jokes about their dad weren't as satisfying to say if he wasn't there to hear them. Maggie had given up trying to get the attention of their mom who was working on a particularly stubborn juice stain on the floor and had decided to feed herself, she was very clever when deprived of what she wanted and would usually work out how to get it herself.

There was one person missing from this family scene, their dad still hadn't turned up after he ran out of the house and went driving. Lisa could only guess where he was and knowing Homer's predictable behaviour she was probably right, Moes.

He remembered he had to be somewhere important but couldn't quite think where it was. Homer J. Simpson or 'HJS two point oh' was strutting around the scene of night life as if he owned the place. He seemed to smile a lot showing off his big oversized perfect white teeth though what for he didn't know. He knew he had to be somewhere at sometime but what for he didn't know he was too distracted by the bright lights from all the bars in town and the lure of beer.

The night was still young and thousands of ideas raced through his head about what he should do. At the moment there was only one thing on his mind, beer. He'd chased that Duff truck and persuaded the driver who turned out to be local gangster 'Snake', to hand over his stock after he realised shooting Homer wasn't going to kill him. So not so much persuade as break into the back of the van and drank to his hearts content while Snake tried to shape the cops, but he still felt sober. He needed to be transported away from his troubles by the magic liquid that was beer.

Moes might be closed but there were several other bars in town he could drink dry, he thought cheerfully as he started crossing the road. A bright pair of lights fell on him while he was in the middle of the road and he knew all too well what was going to happen next.

A car was coming and was going to ram right into him. He screamed in surprise and horror, but it wasn't his usual scream of surprise. His mouth opened so wide you could fit a family sized table through it and it emitted a scream that was much louder in pitch then his usual scream. His eyes also popped out, hung in mid air for a moment and grew to three times their normal size as Homer continued to scream. When he had finished everything went back into place normally but the vehicle currently careering towards him was going to flatten him again.

His instincts told him to run, but his brain said 'running is for fitness freaks and people who exercise'. The car was mere inches from hitting him when he felt a strange tingling sensation from his ankles. He suddenly found himself accelerating into the air at a great speed as the car passed underneath him. He stopped a few meters into the air before gravity brought him back down and he hit the ground on his feet but again he was catapulted high into the air.

Homer took this in his stride because for some reason he couldn't see the strangeness of anything he was doing. But to other viewers it looked like a man with a big green head had shot into the air like a rocket leaving his shoes behind from which were extending a large, long springy coil that reached up into his trousers where his feet should have been.

The feet both sprang upwards following their owner as the car passed harmlessly beneath him but now when he landed he was thrown back up into the air and seemed to have trouble controlling what he was doing while on these bouncy legs.

His feet landed again and desperately tried to stop his bouncing, which he managed to do but what it was replaced with hurt even more. Instead of bouncing up and down he now fell forward on his spring legs which were still two meters long and slammed him into the pavement face first before his spring legs pulled him back upwards again before slamming him back into the pavement making the back of his head slam against the floor. This process was repeated several times each time he screamed "d'oh" until he came to an unsteady stop. He stood there on his two meter high spring loaded legs when.

"D'oh!" As if for good measure his body had spontaneously decided to slam him into the ground just one more time before his spring legs retracted back into his trousers. Recovering from his dizzy spell faster then he was used to he turned around to see the car that nearly killed him driving away, it was almost a hit and run if they had actually hit him.

Focusing his eyes on the car what he was seeing suddenly zoomed right in so he could see the driver of the car. It was Patty and Selma going home from Bart's party.

Bart's party! He'd forgot! That's what he had forgotten to do, and he had forgotten to get Bart that stupid Radio active man figure. Marge was going to hate him in the morning.

"Did you see that drunk idiot standing in the middle of the street", said a rough voice which might or might not be female.

"Yeah, where did he go? Did you run him over?"

"Who cares" these were the voices of Patty and Selma he didn't know which one was speaking when though because they were twins and sounded similar. This was odd though he thought because he could see Patty and Selma he was also for some reason able to hear their conversation.

"Ugn, that was the worst party ever"

"You're telling me, the food was awful, I wouldn't feed it to a dog"

"At least we never got to see that fat idiot Homer"

"Rushed out to get Bart a present"

"Just like the fat idiot he is"

"Too bad his brain isn't as large as his stomach"

"He's so fat if you fired him into space he'd create his own miniature solar system"

The two hags began to laugh at Homers expense. He had missed the party and now Patty and Selma were joking about him. This made him angry he felt a seething hot anger in his veins he usually only reserved for when he intended on choking the life out of Bart.

Homer's zoomed in vision was actually just his eyes which had popped out of his eye sockets and were following the car. They quickly flew backwards and snapped back into his eye sockets knocking his head backwards momentarily before he regained his balance.

He wasn't going to take that crap now he had no idea why he didn't get back at them before now, maybe it was Marge but Marge wasn't here right now to stop him and he had a plan. He rubbed his hands together as an evil glint came into his eye.

Homer waited for the hags to get home before he started on what he was planning. He crept up the steps to their apartment making sure to make 'extra' noise then was actually necessary, strolled up to their apartment door and knocked, but didn't knock as in someone at the door. He hammered his fists against it making it sound like 'open up I'm in trouble'.

After a few seconds he heard the locks and bolts being pulled away from the door but just before it opened Homer sent himself into a quick rapid spin on his heels. When he stopped he wasn't in the same clothes.

The door was answered by Patty who looked similar to Marge only she was fatter and had a large bush of hair sort of like an afro and was smoking a cigarette.

"Who the hell's knocking at this time of nighyayayaaaAAA!" Patty long time smoker was literally looking into the eyes of death himself. A little fatter then she expected though but he had a big green skull with rolling red eyes and his hands were bones without a shred of flesh on them and he wore a black hooded cloak, this could only be death.

"Trick or Treat!" it said in an unearthly tone which caused Patty's eyes to go wide and she screamed, in response to this Homer mimicked Patty's terrified face but made his look more like a mock of hers. His jaw detached and fell to the ground and his eyes inflated to twice their size. After he had mocked her scream everything fell back onto his face.

At the sound of her sister's scream Selma also entered the room, she was almost the same as Patty only her hair was more like a bush then an afro.

"Okay, okay" Patty said quickly "listen I'm not ready for death yet, but I know who is. My sister's married a real fat unhealthy man he's practically on the verge of dying, kill him instead!"

"Don't be so stupid, it's just some guy in a Halloween costume" grunted Selma looking at the death figure who looked fat. "Hey, death you're putting on some weight, you needed some meat on those bones but not in those places"

"Oh yeah, and what are you two supposed to be? No, no, no let me guess!" somehow that nutcase had got past Patty and into their apartment. "The wicked witches of the East and West?" He said as he placed a skeleton hand on their hands and with a twist spun them around extremely fast like he had just done a minute ago, when they had stopped they were both dressed like hag witches.

"Hey, what the?" said Patty as they looked at their altered attire "How did he do that?"

"Get outta here!" said Selma forcefully "Or I'm calling the cops"

"They're pretty tied up at the moment" the green skulled man said smiling showing his jaws to be full of large purl white teeth, as he remembered he left Police Chief Wiggum and another police officer up a telephone pole so they were really tied up at the minute.

"I said 'Trick or Treat' where's the candy?" he said as with a flash and a zooming type noise he was gone. They both thought he had left until they heard the sounds of cupboards being opened then banging closed from the kitchen and then the noise of their fridge being opened. "OHHH! OMIGOD OMIGOD OMIGOD! JACKPOT!" came the voice of their intruder. They both clambered over to the kitchen door to see what was going on.

Their intruder had changed into another garb of bikers jacket and trousers was this even the same guy? How had he changed his clothes so fast? Then what he was doing registered in their minds, he was currently ransacking Patty and Selma's fridge of almost everything. "Cupcakes, stakes, cakes" he began counting off as he picked them up and tossed them into an oversized sack. He then picked up a bowl of salad "Errk!" their intruder squealed "Not the salad I hate salad, salads are evil!" he threw it over his shoulder and the bowl smashed on the floor spreading the mixed salad all over the place.

Satisfied with what he had, he swung his sack onto his back, the sack was so full it knocked Patty and Selma to the floor as they tried to jump him. In the next instant Homer was back in their entrance hall as he stuffed his takings into a jacket pocket which was much too small to contain the big bag of food items yet somehow managed to fit.

Patty and Selma had got up onto their feet and rushed back into their apartment entrance to witness him fitting a massive sack into a tiny jacket pocket. Selma picked up the phone and prepared to dial 911, but dropped it as something large was shoved into her mouth. Patty also had something large shoved into her mouth by the nutcase in a mask. As Patty and Selma looked at each other they saw it wasn't one thing but many of them, it was a large wad of cigarettes.

"Sorry I must dash my ladies" he bowed in a gentlemanly like fashion "though the terms are only loosely accurate" he quipped as he pulled out a lighter from his jacket pocket. He put it under Patty and Selma's cigarette's and lit it, a massive flame erupted from the end of the lighter lighting all the cigarettes at once and caused burn marks in the ceiling above. After that he turned to leave, but turned back for a moment.

"Oh there is just one more thing" he said adding a Colombo style twist to his voice "A little piece of health advice".

Patty and Selma muffled a 'what' sounding noise they were desperate for this nut to leave, they were terrified of him.

Homer went straight up to them squeezed in between them and put his arms around their shoulders "SSSSSSSMOKINNNnnnn'!..." he said before he dashed out of the apartment and into the hall before adding "…is bad for your health!"

BANG went the wad of trick cigarettes, leaving Patty and Selma's face black with soot.

The masked man laughed like a maniac as he launched himself on what looked like a pair of spring loaded legs through the window shattering the glass screaming 'WHEEEeeeee!'

Patty spat the remains of their trick cigarettes out of her mouth and Selma did the same. Patty wiped her face to remove the black soot from it and Selma picked up the phone again to call for the police when the ground suddenly shook with the sound of a loud crash from outside.

They both rushed out of their apartment and went to the broken window to see what was going on. On the ground below them standing on what remained of their car was that same masked weirdo. He'd landed on top of their car which couldn't take the impact and practically collapsed in on itself.

Un-phased and unharmed the man leapt off the car and landed on the sidewalk, he brushed himself off and began walking down the street and into the darkness as the shadows swallowed him. But immediately came back on a big black bike and side car apparently chasing a pizza delivery boy on a small scooter. The man on the pizza bike screamed in his attempt to get away as the masked mad man who hung his tongue out of his mouth to let it to swing in the breeze, shouted.

"Whatever it is I'll take it!"


	5. The Morning After

**Chapter 4**

**The Morning after**

Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz

Homer moaned but still he did not want to wake up, he was enjoying this dream too much he didn't want to wake up from it. He'd drunk so much, he ate so much and he finally got back at Patty and Selma this was the perfect dream for him but the infernal buzzing wouldn't simply let him lie in his slumber, that at it wouldn't stop unless he woke up and shut it off. His head lay on the soft pillow of his bed, why wouldn't that stupid alarm take a hint and stop. Seeing no alternative he let himself wake up roll over onto his front and lazily reach to turn it off, click it was off and he let his hand drop to the floor.

He rolled over again so he lay on his back and for the first time felt what was probably the mother of all hangovers. He opened his eyes, but shut them quickly, it was too bright and it made the pain in his head all the worse. There was also a pain in his stomach that woke him up more effectively then any buzzing clock. He dropped something he was lazily holding in his right hand and heard it clatter to the floor. He didn't care what it was as another bout of pain went through his bowls, he needed to use a toilet any toilet quickly. He pushed himself off his bed and moved quickly into the bed rooms' bath room and sat down on a toilet and prepared to evacuate.

BANG, BANG, BANG! came the sound of gun shots

"AH! Assassination!" he screamed flattening himself to the floor in case the shots hit him. He listened intently for the 'would be assassin', but all he could hear was a draining sound… that was coming from the toilet bowl.

"What the?" he said standing up, forgetting his previous thought of an armed assassin trying to kill him. He moved towards the toilet bowl and looked inside, there was now a massive hole in the bottom of the toilet which was leaking water all the way down into the TV area. There were also several tiny holes in the floor of that room, there them was Maggie who looked up at Homer through the hole he had somehow created and started applauding him.

"HOMER! WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU DOING?" came Marge's voice from down stairs.

"He's had a monster crap" came a voice that could only be Bart "I hate to think what his farts do!"

"Why you little!" Homer said anger rising in his voice, thankfully for Bart though Homer was up stairs and couldn't reach down and strangle the life out of him.

What had just happened? His backside went off like a cannon, he reached up and rubbed his coved over head. He remembered swallowing several bullets the police fired at him in his dream but that was a dream wasn't it? Maybe he was still dreaming? That was prefect! He could help Leonardo Dicaprio escape the end of Inception. Wait! If this was a dream then he was the master of this world which means the pillows will be made of marshmallows!

"Hmmm Marshmallows aggghhhhh" he willed the pillows to be marshmallows and without stopping to think he grabbed his pillow and took a bite out of it while simultaneously drooling all over it. This was a funny tasting marshmallow he decided, it wasn't tasty and it wasn't sweet, tasted like it had plenty of starch though. He ripped a large chunk out of it and feathers erupted from the hole. Wait a minute! Marshmallows don't have feathers.

He spat out the material and feathers he already had in his mouth out, okay he was actually awake and he was sure of it because if this was a dream the marshmallow would be full of chicken not feathers.

But that didn't explain how he had just fired several bullets from his backside. Maybe he was a super hero? Maybe all those years working in the nuclear plant had given him super powers? Maybe he…?

He held his head as all that thinking made his painful hangover register all the more. What did he do last night? The pain in his stomach was overshadowed by the pain in his head now. He knew he would one day kill his brain with bear but if this is what he had to endure if he was brain dead he'd rather have it back.

His stomach ached so much he wished the bottom would fall out of it, _that would be useful when it came to dinner time_ he thought, but after a few moments the bottom did fall out of his stomach, but not for the reasons he was thinking of, he'd just remembered something and it wasn't good. He'd missed Bart's party that's what he'd done, he never showed up he just went to Moes instead after getting Bart a present. He got him one so that should count for something but where did he leave it?

More questions started flooding his mind but he pushed them all to the back of his head, finding that present was paramount to him right now, he brought up the sheets of the bed, looked under the pillows, under the bed, he even checked a box of chocolates he'd bought Marge. It wasn't there but there were several chocolates Marge didn't want because she was on that diet thing –just thinking the word 'diet' made him cringe-, well since she didn't want them why waste them, so he ate them.

He took a step forward as he enjoyed the chocolaty taste of chocolate when he stood on something that was hard and wooden. Looking down he saw what he was looking for on the floor, laying there at his side of the bed, the Mask.

He bent down and picked it up, his thoughts suddenly went back to that wonderful dream he had last night. Perfect, it started with a giant marshmallow in his car and ended with a massive drink from the back of a Duff truck followed by revenge on Patty and Selma. He should have more dreams like that he decided. But wait? After leaving Moes how did he get home? A question he always asked himself after he came back from Moes but not one he usually bothered answering. After all, 'if he couldn't control himself then it's not illegal'.

"Homer!" came Marge's voice, it sounded like she was going to nag him about something and he knew exactly what it would be about, she came into the bed room to confront him.

"Homer!" she repeated "Where were you last night? and what the heck happened to your car?" she indicated through a window.

"Huh?" car? What was wrong with his car? He looked outside and saw just the mangled wreck of metal outside. Was that his car? It was in the drive at least but it was battered, more battered then usual its entire front had caved in as if it hit something. He suddenly remembered he had been drinking so if he was drinking he was probably driving which means…

Oh boy! Marge wouldn't be happy about that, he'd missed Bart's party because he went to Moes, he didn't get him that Radiothingy and to top it all off he's crashed his car. Marge would never understand, she was a woman and he was a guy, women were not meant to understand guy things anymore then he could understand why women check their makeup in every mirror they pass at a party. He had only once choice, he'd have to lie.

"I don't know" he said trying to sound innocent, he paused trying to think fast he knew just saying that wouldn't cut it "It always looked like that"

Marge fixed him with an annoyed stare and made that slight moan she makes when she's suspicious it was a sure sign she wasn't buying his story, either that or she wanted a mirror to check her make up, but he opted for the former "and where were you last night?" she asked.

"Oh, what's the use?" Homer broke down and sat on the bed "I never got Bart that Radiohead thing he wanted, I went to every toy shop in Springfield looking for one and even went outside town looking for it" the last part was a lie but she'd kill him if she ever found out he'd been drinking. He looked up and could see the sorrow look in her eyes, she was falling for it.

"Oh Homie" she smiled "I knew you'd forget to get Bart his present so I bought him it earlier"

"Huh?" Homer said, "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I did! Seven times but you jumped into your car and drove away"

This wasn't the first time he hadn't heard what Marge said, in fact almost every time he never heard what Marge said.

"But what happened to your car?" she asked again a little less annoyed this time

Homer tried to think quickly, how could he explain the damage to his car? Thankfully the question passed as her attention turned to what was in his hands.

"What is that?" she asked eyeing the mask he found as if it was some mutant squirrel with two heads. Homer breathed a mental sigh of relief that the conversation had moved on.

"I got this to replace the Radiothingy" Homer said holding up in front of her the grubby looking mask. Marge didn't look impressed at all "What makes you think Bart would want that?"

"Look at it Marge!" he said getting up to stand next to Marge one arm over her sholders the other holding the Mask at arms length away and let it face them "Now imaging Bart's face"

"Oh I see" Marge said, "but it's just a piece of junk I don't think he'd want this"

"Don't think I'd want what?" asked the eleven year old coming into their bed room probably to see what the commotion was about.

"Your fathers bought you another birthday present" Marge said as Homer showed him the wooden mask, he hoped he like it, he'd better for $75.

"WOOh! Cool!" said Bart snatching it away almost immediately "I needed something like this for tonight when…" he stopped himself before he could go further as if he was about to blurt out his plans to the enemy "When I decide to stay in and watch cartoons" that was the worst excuse he had ever come up with and Marge was eyeing him suspiciously. "Thanks dad" he said giving his old man a hug before racing off back to his bed room, Homer knew the hug was just a scam to stop him being suspicious about what Bart was going to do tonight… and it worked.

"Junk? Eh Marge" Homer said smugly "I should get him junk for all his presents it'll make Christmas really cheap"

* * *

Bart knew Homer forgot to buy him that Radioactive Man action set, it was a dead give away because when he got it and looked at the label the writing was actually neat, it wasn't in Homer's childish scrawls. But he didn't care he got what he wanted and more. He actually thought this mask itself was just a piece of crap, but he was planning on a night of pranking and this mask would hide his face perfectly.

Not looking where he was going Bart walked right into Lisa coming out of the bathroom causing them both to fall into a tangled mess on the floor and Bart dropped his new mask.

"Bart! Watch where you're going!" she said pushing Bart off her she straightening herself up and brushing herself down. Bart got up as well and reached for his new possession when it was snatched off the ground by Lisa

"What's this?" she asked looking it curiously no doubt thinking what Bart was doing with this thing.

"That's mine!" Bart insisted trying to snatch it from her but she moved it out of his reach.

"Where did you get it?" she asked looking suspicious, not convinced Bart owned such an old looking object

"Dad got it for me!" Bart said still trying to get his mask

Lisa looked back at the Mask, why did she always have to ruin everything for him? What did he ever do to her? Apart from the headless Malibu Stacy dolls and the plastic spider down her dress. She had to just ruin his fun.

He reached out and managed to snatch it from her fingers as she tried to examine it.

"Bart it looks like an artefact, it belongs in a museum!" Lisa said putting her hands on her hips.

"Don't museums get enough crap these days?" he said walking past her into his room and slamming the door in her face.

Stupid Lisa, she always has to poke her nose in other peoples business. He'll come up with a prank to pull on her to do with that nosey nose of hers, but first he had to set up the plans for the pranks tonight. He and Milhouse were going to go and pull some on Skinner, the principle of their school who was a complete dweeb. He always gave him detentions for standing around and doing nothing, except maybe spray painting the words "Stinker!" into a wall next to Skinners face. Or placing a pin tac on the seat of a teacher, or use the School intercom to trick Rod and Tod –the children of their religious neighbour Flanders- into thinking god was speaking to them and make them to do all sorts of crazy stuff.

Actually wait, he hasn't done that last one yet, but it was a good one, he added it to the list of pranks to pull in the future.

* * *

It was now the afternoon and Lisa had spent the last few hours looking up if any masks had been stolen from museums lately. Not that she expected either dad or Bart to have stolen that mask, though she wouldn't put it past either Homer when drunk or Bart when he's sober. However nothing seemed to be coming up about stolen masks in her search, not even a museum break in. Maybe dad did legitimately buy Bart that mask. Why was she even doing this? It wasn't as if she wanted the stupid thing? Maybe it was just her busybody nature to poke her nose into things that didn't look right.

She was about to close down the internet window to end her search for 'Stolen Mask' when something caught her eye. One of the search results had a picture attached to it and by the address it linked to the Springfield Tree, a news paper. 'Masked mad man humiliates cops, steals Duff from a truck and frightens old ladies.'

She would've ignored it completely but the picture which sat next to it just stared her in the face. It showed a man in a rubber mask and plastic looking hair. It caught her eye because it just looked familiar somehow as if she'd known that face her whole life but subtle changes to it made it nearly unrecognisable.

She saved the picture to her computer and started the PaintSlop Pro tool and loaded the picture into it. She first started by turning the skin the correct colour. Smoothed out the face, changed the eye colour to black. It was starting to look more human at least but she still couldn't place it. As she moved the mouse over to smooth out his brow she mistakenly removed his hair. She was about to hit 'undo' when she saw someone she recognised in that face. She used the paint brush tool to give the man two strands of hair in a comb over and some around his ears. To finish it off she gave him some stubble of a short beard. This couldn't be right, could it? It must be a coincidence of some sort, there was no way that was who she thought it was.

"Dad?" she said out loud, the masked man looked almost like her father the only difference being the eyes which just looked… wrong somehow. Homer's eyes never looked like that not even when he's angry and ready to strangle the life out of Bart. She went back to the headline and read what the news papers had to say.

'_Police are currently seeking the identity of a masked man in his forties, the masked man, who was named by police as 'Green Face' reportedly took down two officers single handed and withstood several bullet shots to his body, even the head at close range. 'Green Face' went on to imitate Piemans signature attack of throwing pies into the faces of police Chief Wiggum who was on his tail at the time.__'_

There was a picture of Clancy Wiggum standing in the middle of a field eating a pie, the caption read 'Police Chief Wiggum at the scene of the attack'

'_Chief Wiggum had this to say "My self __and my colleague, Lou were out driving following a suspected drunk driver when the car went off the road and crashed. The man who was behind the wheel survived the impact and began mercilessly attacking us, we held him for as long as possible but he escaped."_

_When asked about the rumours that the masked man had __reportedly tied them upside down from a telephone pole and threw pies at them Chief Wiggum had this to say._

"_Oh completely unsubstantiated" he said taking another bite of__ his pie and spoke through a full mouth "Though we are sure he is a copy cat of Pieman the vigilante of a few years back" Lou then had this to say to Wiggum_

"_Chief i__sn't that pie the one he never got to throw?" to which Wiggum replied "Sure is Lou, you can't have any, finders keepers" to which Lou asked "Chief isn't that evidence?" to which the Chief said "Yeah, but a pies a pie, and pies are food and I haven't had breakfast yet, get off my case!"_

_When asked what the general public should do about this masked man Chief Wiggum gave this advice "What I always say, keep all doors locked and a gun loaded and ready and shoot anyone you don't recognise on your land"_

_It should be noted that later Wiggum recalled his last statement saying not to shoot__ people you don't know in the street as it is extremely dangerous and asked it be left to the professionals._

'_Green Face' then went on to attack a stolen truck of Duff bear, stolen by none other then local felon Snake, who was apprehended however was later released when the Duff truck turned out to be full of nothing but empty bottles. The police let Snake off with a warning not to steal Duff trucks full of empty bottles again unless he asked permission first._

'_That guy is 'so' gonna pay' were the words of Snake to the interviewer before he robbed him of his camera and ten dollars._

_Green Face__ was also reported to have attacked a couple of old ladies, Patty and Selma Bouvier in their apartment. He stole from their cupboards and fridge before leaping into the night with his stolen goods._

She stopped reading there, in some ways this sounded like her dad, the stolen Duff bear, attacking Patty and Selma, even the Pieman –who her father actually was at one point- but Homer had always restrained himself from steeling stuff and hurting Patty and Selma even when drunk. Besides if he had drank an entire truck full of Duff bear he'd die of alcohol poisoning. Yet the similarities between 'Green Face' and Homer were uncanny, but even if Homer had stolen all that stuff, where would he hide it?

A loud crash came from downstairs…

* * *

Downstairs a few seconds ago…

Homer was finally up and about and he was also hungry after his night out on the town. He went into the kitchen and walked over to the fridge, but could hear it creaking loudly.

"Huh?" he said as he placed on hand on the door, which suddenly flew open free of his hand causing an avalanche of food products to fall from the fridge on top of him, curiously more then could actually be fitted into the fridge itself. "D'oh!"

"OOOooh Twinkies!" he said kneeling down and scooping up the packet of sweet cakes, opening it and shovelling them all into his mouth at once. "Ummmm Twinkies AAggghhhh"

He got up and walked away from the large pile of food, the misses could clean it up.

* * *

_Location: Springfield Family Home_

_Date: Sunday_

_Time: 8:15pm_

Were there words going through Bart's head as he prepared for his night of pranks, on his bed he had a collection of things such as fire crackers, toilet paper, a flash light –because it was dark outside- a bag full of Santa's Little Helpers dog poo. A little old hat he knew but this was going to lead into something bigger. He also had a tube of superglue all of which he began packing into a backpack while in the semi-darkness of his room.

His plan was set the bag of dog poo on fire outside Skinners house, Skinner would come out and try to stamp on it to stop the fire spreading. Not only will this foot smell of poo but what he won't know is his other food will be stood in super glue which will glue him to the spot. Bart will also put glue on the rails of Skinners porch because he'll probably try to grab one to help lift his shoe off. He'd then be a sitting target for their spit balls, which is what the toilet paper was for. This was gonna be so great.

A crackling noise came over his Krusty the Clown walky-talky –aka the top secret Krusty-talky- as his partner in crime Milhouse made contact.

"Bart, I don't know if my parents will like me being up this late again, especially after what happened the last time"

O_h Ay_ _caramba__!_ Milhouse was his best friend but he could act like such a dork at times. He picked up the walky-talky and talked to him as he began changing his clothes to something more suitable.

"Milhouse, if your parents told you to jump off a cliff would you do it?" he asked as he began pulling on clothes similar to his last ones only they were green patchy like the combat clothes they had in the army.

"I suppose I would yes" came Milhouses lame reply "But with my asthma I don't think I'll be able to make it up the mountain in the first place."

With his new camouflage disguise on Bart was about to speak again when he heard a noise outside. Someone was coming! He ducked down behind the bed waiting for whoever it was to pass or something.

"Bart, you still there?" _shut up Milhouse_ he wanted to say but couldn't risk giving away his position to the enemy.

Bart saw from under his bed a crack of light from the hall, a shadow passed over it as someone walked up to the door then walked straight past. He breathed a sigh of relief. It didn't matter if he got caught anyway it's not as if grounding him would stop him.

"Milhouse!" he whispered into the walky-talky "Keep your voice down, don't give your position away to the enemy"

"Umm? Okay?" Milhouse sounded unsure about something but Bart wasn't about to ask what it was.

"Don't worry Milhouse" said Bart over his walky-talky, "just sneak out, get to Skinners and I'll be there in a sec, okay!" before Milhouse could say anymore he quickly said "Special Agent Double Oh Bart out!"

He flipped the switch which turned the Krusty-talky off as he loaded his backpack with anything else he needed. At the last minute he picked up a super soaker full of cat wee. _No point wasting an opportunity like this. _He thought.

He took out his flash light and flipped it on, it worked perfectly. Only one thing left to do before going on this mission. He walked over to a draw and rummaged around until he found what he wanted, two elastic bands which he will use to strap the final part of his disguise to his face so it didn't fall off.

He picked up the Mask, he had tried in vain to drill holes in the stupid thing but the drill he borrowed from Homer didn't even scratch it, whatever it was it was made of it was something incredibly tough. He stretched the elastic band which were wrapped around his fingers, using these he could strap it on easily.

Still holding the elastic bands in his right hand he lifted the Mask to his face, it was just about to make contact with his skin when suddenly…

"E-yow!" he yelped as his face skin felt like it was being sucked up and pulled on as if by a vacuum cleaner and the Mask -which was pretty solid- began bending inwards towards his face somehow. He immediately pulled the thing away from his face which came off with a feeling of duct tape coming off skin.

That was unusual, he thought as he looked into the back of the Mask, it felt like it was actually trying to attach itself to his skin, it didn't tear his face off at least he couldn't see any flakes of skin in there. His hands which held the Mask suddenly started to feel as if they were tingling, like when you fall asleep on your hand and wake up with it numb and it tingles as the feeling starts to return to it, it was sort of like that.

Then the Mask lit up as a strange green and purple light passed over the inside of it from left to right, his eyes slowly went wide. He couldn't help himself as he brought the Mask closer to his face. Just as it was about to make contact with his nose he felt it jump out of his grasp and land directly on his face. He snapped back to his senses immediately and felt for the Mask on his face.

It was twisting and distorting its shape as if it was alive. He reached up to pull this thing off but when he felt for where the edges should have been all he felt was the wriggling wood which slowly started to gain the texture of rubber. He reached further back behind his head looking for the edges, he found them but they weren't staying still they were stretching around the back of his head like the thing was growing and encasing his head.

He grasped the edges with the tips of his fingers and tried to pull it off, he lost his grip and let go, the thing continued to stretch until it reached the back of his head where he felt the edges join together. He tried to dig his nails into the stupid thing trying to grab onto it and make it come off. But it wouldn't come off! Was this thing going to suffocate him?

In desperation he shouted for help "HELP" he cried, he didn't care if he was caught now, he didn't want to die because of a stupid mask "HELP! SOMEONE HELP, GET THIS STUPID THING OFF ME!"

* * *

Just outside Lisa heard her brothers cries for help, she went over to the door and gentle opened it and stood back half expecting this to be another one of Bart's stupid pranks. But nothing came no water from above, no falling plastic spiders, nothing. Confident that if there was a prank then it wasn't in the door she pushed it further open until she could see Bart by his bed. He was holding the back of his head trying to scratch at some stupid green ball he had around it.

"Bart, what is it?" she asked half sceptically suspecting nothing was actually wrong and it was the lead to some prank, but still there was worry in her voice.

Bart twisted around to face her and Lisa almost screamed, the green ball around his head looked like that old mask he got this morning only it had wrapped completely around his head encasing it and the thing was wriggling around as if it were alive. Bart was screaming for her to help him as he tried in vain to get it off.

Lisa began to approach when the wood grain of the mask began to light up and bright green beams shot from it with a crackling noise like what came from a welding torch when welding two piece of metal together.

The entire room lit up with a thunder crack, but it was a clear night outside where the heck had that come from? It came again and the room lit up even brighter then before, Lisa started to back away when she saw Bart's skeleton through his body as another even louder thunder clap came. The sounds of thunder were coming from Bart who was still trying in vain to remove the thing from his head.

His body writhed one way twisting him clockwise and he stopped for a second resisting the rotation, which he didn't appear to be doing voluntarily. But then he was taken completely by surprise when he was made to writhed the other way but this time he couldn't stop himself and he did not stop or slow down, he just went faster and faster! He was spinning around and around on the heels of his shoes, around and around showing no signs of slowing his rotation.

Lisa stood back watching in half fascination half fear as Bart continued spinning so fast on his feet that he looked like a miniature tornado, cries for help came from it but were muffled as the air around him also rotated causing a great gust of wind in all directions. The mini twister began moving around the room with incredible speed, it circled the bed and leapt over it causing the entire room to shake when it landed. It then proceeded to slam into the wall causing Bart's toys and possessions to fall off the shelves above. The twister then began climbing up wall as the tail of the twister made contact with it. He was on the ceiling now upside down showing no sign of stopping or falling before reaching the other side of the room and quickly spinning down the other side before landing on the ground causing the entire room to shake again.

_What the hell was going on here?_ Were the only words Lisa could think of because not even her scientific brain could understand or make sense of the faulty physics she was witnessing.

A loud screeching noise came out of nowhere which sounded like a break being applied to a car and the twister stopped so rapidly that any normal person would've fallen to the floor. But the figure which now stood were her brother had been not long ago didn't look much like a normal person at all. Nor did it look like her brother, for one his clothes were different, he was wearing a white T-shirt with army pants and jacket which usually had the green patchy pattern on it but instead it was varying hues of red. His head was covered in a green rubber mask which extended behind his head and his spiky hair which was originally spiked up had become longer with many more points all of which were now pointed in every which way making it look like a court jester's hat.

It opened its eyes which were larger then they should be, almost twice as big Lisa guessed and its irises were a deep shade of crimson. His eyebrows lowered making the eyes looked halfway between evilness and just general mischievousness.

It then smiled showing a row of bright white perfect teeth, perfect in everyway apart from the size, they were much too big for his jaw and could in fact probably set the world record for the larges set of teeth in the world.

"Bart?" Lisa said trying to understand the transformation she just witnessed her brother go through "Is that you?"

The green boy straightened himself up he didn't attempt to check his appearance or continue to try to wrench the green mask from his head like he was before. He was acting as if this were completely normal.

"Never better" he said, it was Bart's voice only there was a slight echo and distortion as if he were speaking through a voice modulator, but he didn't have one so how was he making his voice sound so unearthly?

Suddenly Bart was in her face, literally, one minute he was at one side of the room the next he was right in front of her "What are you doing in my room?" he asked, his voice sounded particularly hostile. Startled she fell backwards onto the floor and quickly backed away on all fours not taking her eyes off Bart.

Lisa couldn't understand how he'd moved so quickly that she hadn't even seen it, the only time Bart was anywhere near that quick was when he was passing a museum. She crawled backwards, leaving his room and reaching the wall in the hall, she stood up still with a look of fear and confusion on her face.

"What happened?" she asked as Bart sped out of the bed room and stopped rapidly, the door shut right behind him which was odd because the door closed by itself once he passed through it, he didn't grab it or anything.

"I've got a new groove!" he said, walking away, his movements were not like Barts at all, they smooth almost dance like. This was never Bart, yet it looked too much like… wait a minute he looked a little like 'Green Face' from that paper article she read a few hours ago, there were differences of course 'Green Face' looked like Homer. Then what was Bart doing trying to copycat it?

His 'transformation' if it was genuine started with that green Mask she decided, so she reached forward and grabbed it and tried to pull it off, _this must be a trick_ she told herself but when she pulled on the mask she had to stop, this was impossible! She was astonished when she pulled on the mask and his eye sockets moved out of position with the stretching rubber, the skin of his nose also shifted off the gristle base it should cover and other things.

"Hey, get off my face!" said Bart's mouth which was now where his cheek should be. Alarmed Lisa yelped in surprise and let go of the mask which snapped back into place. When Bart turned to look at her she just managed to stop herself screaming.

His face hadn't gone back to the way it was, it was completely wrong, one of his eyes was where his ear should be while the other eye was in his mouth which was on his left cheek rather then being in front of his jaw. His empty eye socket was at the top of his head and his nose was in the right place but upside down and his ears, in fact that was a point. The ears were the only thing Lisa couldn't see even before she distorted his face.

"Moms always say 'if you play with your face it'll stay that way'" he quipped as he reached up and quickly and physically pushed and pulled each facial feature back into its original position. When he was finished Lisa noted that the ears actually were absence from the face.

Suddenly he was gone again with a whoosh and the air around where he just stood was disturbed with a slight gust which ruffled her hair. She looked in the direction Bart, at least she assumed it was Bart, went and saw he had just gone into the bath room.

She followed watching Bart with a strange mixture of scientific curiosity and amazement. He was standing on the toilet seat looked at his face making minor adjustments to his appearance. Reaching up with his left hand he pulled at his nostrils which stretched so far he could fit a football inside each nostril. A pair of scissors somehow appeared in his other hand and he trimmed his nose hairs which bushed out of each nostril like a massive pair of hair balls. The speed at which he trimmed them was also much faster then she expected. He let go of his nose and it all fell back into place perfectly.

Looking back in the mirror he showed his big white teeth and wiggled his lower jaw from side to side to get a good look at them, then turned his attention to his budging big red eyes.

"Whoa!" he said "way cool!"

He turned and saw Lisa in the room with him

"Hey!" he screamed as his distorted voice suddenly became high pitched "Can't a guy get some privacy around here!"

"Did that mask do this to you?" she asked, it was a theory but before the twirling transformation that green thing on his face looked roughly like that Mask he got this morning, which Homer bought him the night before. An idea began forming in Lisa's head.

"You betcha!" said Bart his voice back to normal, or as normal as it could be. He leaped off the toilet seat onto the floor and walked straight past her back into the corridor.

It was the Mask! Somehow that mask changed him into 'this', that means 'Green Face' probably was dad, he just doesn't realise it and now Bart had it. She decided to follow him because if that Mask made him capable of moving really fast and allowing him to distort his body what else would it allow him to do?

She noted Bart wasn't acting himself either, in fact no that's not right Bart was acting like himself but 'more' like himself then normal and it was also the way he took all these strange things in his stride as if they were completely normal is what really baffled her. How could he not recognise the strangeness of what he was able to do? Then again before this transformation Bart acted like he couldn't see what was wrong with blowing his nose and showing it to people for a laugh.

Lisa decided for the good of everyone in Springfield she had to get that thing off Bart and fast before he does some serious damage and knowing Bart that won't be long. Looking at the back of his head just under his wild hair she could see a sort of ridge where the two parts of the Mask joined together. If she could get her fingers around it she could pull it off him.

It was worth a try she thought as she snuck up behind her brother and quickly dug her nails into the back of the mask. Bart yelped and reached back to try to get her off him but she wasn't going to give up easily. His hands wrapped around her wrists and squeezed tightly trying to force her to let go but she remained hanging onto the Mask as tight as she could and the more he pulled on her hands just added to the force used to get the Mask off him but also increased the possibility she would lose her grip.

The edges of the Mask were coming away, the two halves of the ridge were separating and a green glow came from underneath. She began parting the two halves when Bart suddenly let go of her wrists and his hands disappeared somewhere behind her, she then felt a pain from her backside which made her lose her grip on the menace of a mask and suddenly everything went dark as something fell over her eyes and jammed under her chin leaving her blind. Whatever it was it began pulling her head backwards so much she had to arch her back.

"WEDGIE!" Bart screamed laughing light a real loony, Lisa pulled and slid her own undergarment off her face to see Bart laughing, then his face turned to a more serious tone before saying "DO - NOT – TOUCH – THE – FACE!" in a deep voice which didn't sound like his.

Element of surprised lost she reached forward to rip the mask off Bart's face. But he leaped into the air at twice his normal height making Lisa miss. He landed behind her and shot off faster then she could keep up and ran into his bed room. Lisa followed and the door behind her slammed shut of its own accord. Bart was bouncing around the room from wall to wall to ceiling and floor as if he were made of rubber. He then began running along the walls very fast with no sign of feeling the effect of gravity. Her eyes could keep up with him but there was no way she'd be able to catch him.

He leapt off the wall somersaulted in the air, landed on his bed and leapt out the closed window, which smashed as he passed through it leaving a Bart shaped hole in the fractured glass.

Lisa heard an audible snatch and stretching noise as she went to the window to see where he went. She had to use a chair to get some extra height to see outside and the sight before her just made her laugh.

Bart had jumped out of the bedroom window but on the way down he got his head wedged between two thick, sturdy branches from the tree just outside his bedroom. The top half of his head ballooned out under the pressure while the bottom half had stretched towards the ground. His body was on the ground running as fast as it could, its legs rotated so fast they were a whirl of motion like in a cartoon but he wasn't going anywhere because of his trapped head.

This was her one chance, Lisa lifted herself up towards the window so she could climb out she undid the catch on it and slid it upwards so she didn't have to try to fit through the Bart shaped hole to get outside. Being careful of the sharp glass which littered parts of the window frame she crawled out grabbing a branch to pull herself up into the tree. Bart had done it thousands of times before so how hard could this be?

On the branch now she slowly crawled her way towards Bart's trapped head and reached forward about to pull on the ridge which would get the mask off him when, snap! The branch she was on began to break away. This freed Bart's head and it quickly snapped back to him knocking him to the ground.

The branch broke clean off and Lisa fell towards the ground, she tried to grab onto another branch on the way down but each one was too flimsy and broke under her weight and the momentum. This might not have stopped her but it slowed her down enough so she survived the landing on the ground. Dust was kicked up from the floor and entered her eyes and she coughed waving away the dust and wiping her face until she could see again. Some of the dust had gone into her mouth and she was still coughing.

She could see Bart was still here the big red eyes looking at her in a form of cruel amusement.

He twisted his left leg over the right and spun around really fast like he did when he was transforming but when he stopped he wasn't wearing the same clothes. He was dressed in black trousers and a white shirt, in his right hand was a microphone and he raised his empty left hand high into the air at an angle and clenched his left fist. Music suddenly filled the air from no apparent source, it had a thudding beat and Bart tapped his foot in time with the rhythm. As Lisa coughed up more dust Bart sang in a mock singing voice "Another one bites the dust!" an obvious imitation of Freddy Mercury from the British rock group Queen.

He then twisted his legs around and swung his arms to force himself into another fast spin only this time he didn't stop. He just went faster and faster, dust was kicked up from where his feet now formed a point making contact with the floor and the whirling noise also grew in pitch. A great gust of wind blew Lisa's hair around as the whirling, spinning form of Bart began to move. He shot forward through the white fence which lead into the Flanders back garden, a noise which sounded like a chainsaw cutting through wood could be heard momentarily as Bart left a hole in the shape of a distorted, inverted triangle as he passed through. The mini twister continued on suddenly leaping over the next tall fence with ease and disappearing from view, the whirling noise died down as Bart, whatever he had become disappeared from sight.

* * *

**Authors notes**: It was much more fun and easier to write for Bart as the Mask then for Homer.

I don't know what elastic bands are actually called in America, if they are called anything else, so sorry about that.

Also I've never written a mock newspaper article before so this is my first time trying that out, it was originally going to be the news on the TV but I thought Lisa would more likely read about it on the internet.

Hope everyone's enjoying the story.


	6. The Masquerade

**Authors Notes:** Bart's version of the Mask is much more dangerous then any of the Masks seen before. Where as Homer was just being himself, Bart's Mask is how the original mask was supposed to be like, performing comical looking pranks which in real life are particularly violent and probably fatal. This imitates Barts love of the Itchy and Scratchy show and is similar to how the Ipkiss Mask was based of his love of cartoons like the Looney Tunes.

* * *

Chapter 5

The Masquerade

Sitting across the road from Skinners house Milhouse could see their target, Principle Skinner, he walking around through the front window but he couldn't see what exactly he was doing, whatever it was it was obviously to do with school.

Milhouse felt a bit bad for what he and Bart were about to do to him, but the other half was just happy to have a friend, he didn't have many. He looked at his watch again and saw the seconds ticking away. It was ten minutes past ten so where was he? He's usually never been this later before. They were supposed to meet at ten o'clock on the dot and its not as if Bart lived that far away from here, it should only have taken him about an hour depending on if the cops were out.

What if he had been caught, by his parents or the police? Then he'd probably have to do it alone, but he didn't have the supplies needed for this prank. Bart was going to bring them because Milhouse wasn't allowed to buy fire crackers, fire works or anything dangerous like that not since that incident involving the cherry bomb and Skinners coffee.

He ducked back down behind a car when he saw Skinner looking out at where he was just standing. If Bart didn't turn up soon he'd have to go home, he couldn't pull this off by himself.

Whoosh, boing! Came a noise that sounded like a blowing wind followed by one a ruler makes when you make it vibrate over the side of a desk.

"Hey Milhouse!" came a creepy sounding voice, that made a chill run up his spin. He turned and looked directly into the eyes of a big green headed person with big red threatening eyes. He yelped in surprise and fell backwards.

"Shhh!" the boy hushed "Keep it down will you, we don't want Skinner catching on"

"Bart?" he said getting back up onto his feet and straightening his glasses "Is that you? Neat disguise!" he was wearing a similar army camouflage clothes he was wearing though it was in a red colour rather then a green colour. His face was also covered with a big green mask and a wig which made his hair look extra long and completely un-kept.

"Why, thank you" Bart said putting a more posh twist to his otherwise unearthly voice.

"Though I don't think red is going to work well as a disguise" Milhouse advised but Bart didn't look like he was paying attention, his full focus was on Skinner house. Skinner wasn't standing at the window anymore he was sitting down at a table typing something out on a typewriter. Whatever happened to using plain old computers these days?

Milhouse was astonished to see Bart holding an eye glass, like what pirates used to use to see distant objects on the sea, to view Skinner. When did Bart have that? In fact it didn't look like Bart had collected any supplies at all because he didn't have his backpack on and it looked like all his pockets were empty. How were they going to prank Skinner without the stuff? The eye glass extended, and extended and extended! Until it was up to the window itself and was practically looking over Skinners shoulder. That was strange, Milhouse had to admit.

Skinner was indeed typing something up and by the look of it looked like his autobiography. He got annoyed when the keys jammed on him.

"Boring!" he said as the eye glass retracted back into a small tube, "time to prank"

"What are we gonna do first? TPing? Fire crackers in the chimney? Dog Poo in a flaming paper bag?

"Naa!" he said waving Milhouses' suggestions away "watch and learn from the Prince of Pranks!"

Before Milhouse could ask anything Bart was gone, he hadn't just walked away he was gone-gone, gone in a flash. Milhouse looked around for a second wondering how Bart had done that until he saw him standing next to the front door of Skinners house and he was about to ring the door bell.

* * *

Ding dong

"Seymour someone's at the door!" an elderly woman shouted from upstairs "Answer it"

"Yes mother" Seymour Skinner said as he ripped out the paper from the top of the typewriter, screwed it up and threw it away. That yell caused him to make another typing error so he'd have to start all over again. He really needed to buy a home computer but Mother wouldn't let him in case he looked on any naughty websites.

Ding Dong!

"Okay I'm coming" he called as his hand grasped the door knob and turned it. He pulled the door open then –SPLAT!- something soft and slimy had just smacked into his face. The force of the impact made him take a step back and nearly fall backwards but he just managed to keep his balance. He reached up with his hands and wiped the stuff off his face, some of the stuff had gone into his mouth and it had the taste of lemon. He'd just been hit in the face by a pie.

He cleared his eyes of the gunk and turned his attention to the door where the thrower of the baked confection would've been. Only there was nobody there, just a plank of wood standing upright. This must've been what pushed the pie into his face with so much force. He walked up to the plank and pushed it out of the way so he could get through the door. There was no one around as far as he could see but there were plenty of places where they could hide and he could think of several children who would prank him like this, all of them from Springfield Elementary where he was principle and one in particular who could think up such a prank, Bart Simpson.

His attention turned to the contraption used to project the pie into his face. Now that was strange, he thought to himself. There was just a plank of wood, that's all it was, there were no springs or elastic bands to speak of, no form of tension device to spring the wooden board upwards to smack the pie into his face, so how had it quickly become erected?

He decided to bring the board inside and closed the door, if he couldn't find out who did it at least he had some extra wood for the fire.

"Seymour!" called mothers voice again "Who was that outside?"

"Nobody mother" he called back up putting the plank to one side and taking another step forward –smack!- a wooden pole had swung up and smacked him in the face. Taking a step back he felt his nose which had started to bleed. How did that leaf rake get inside?

He removing the leaf rake to a safe suitable place before returning to his type writer. He sat down and prepared to begin typing again when… That was strange, he thought, because he hadn't replaced the paper in the type writer yet there was a fresh sheet in it. Also there were letter written on it. They simply read "wed geeme"

"Wed geeme?" he said out loud

"YOU GOT IT!" said a loud strange voice, he yelped as he felt someone take his underwear and pull it up over his head. "WEDGIE!" the perpetrator screamed

"Hey!" he shouted, the intruder had obviously got inside somehow. Skinner reached up and pulled the white underwear from his head. He looked around for the menace but he was nowhere to be seen, at all, he had just vanished? He didn't hear him run away or open the door to escape so where did he go?

After looking around the house for this prankster he returned to his study, his attention was again caught by his typewriter because new words had been written on the paper, just below the words 'wed geeme' was a fresh paragraph. He started reading it…

_Skinner reads the paper on the type writer_

_They simply read "wed__ geeme"_

"_Wed geeme?" he said out loud_

"_YOU GOT IT!" came a loud strange voice, he yelped as he felt someone take his underwear and pull it up over his head. "WEDGIE!" the perpetrator said_

Or right! He realised 'Wed Geeme'- Wedgie Me- it was a play on words. Hey wait a minute, hadn't this just happened?

"_Hey!" he shouted, the intruder had obviously got inside somehow, he reached up and pulled the white underwear from his head. He looked around for the menace but he was nowhere to be seen, at all, he had just vanished, he didn't hear him run away or open the door to escape so where did he go?_

_After looking around the house for this prankster he returned to his study, his attention was again caught by his typewriter because new words had been written on the paper, just below the words 'wed geeme' was a fresh paragraph. He started reading it…__and when he had finished he fell through a hole in the floor._

Well that last part wasn't true, he thought there wasn't a hole in the floor for him to fall down. He turned around and stopped immediately, just as the bit of paper had said there was indeed a hole in the middle of the room he was about to step into. He looked down into it, it disappeared down into the darkness, where the heck had that come from? This had to be an illusion, he decided, a piece of paper or something. He reached into his pocket and produced a quarter which he flipped into the hole expecting it to dance on the floor but he was surprised when the quarter actually fell through that 'illusion' and continued down until it clanged on the ground where this hole lead to. This was no illusion, this was real! But this just raised further questions, like how did the boy make this without him noticing?

He was really starting to wise up to this guy, "Thought you could fool Principle Seymour Skinner did you?" he said as he turned around and took a step forward and fell through a second big hole he hadn't noticed. His screams gradually faded away as he continued down into the darkness.

A few moments later the noise of foot steps thundering up a staircase were heard getting louder and louder and Skinner burst through the door which lead to the basement and went back into his study.

"I don't know" said a voice "I think it needs a bit of work" that voice was coming from near the typewriter.

A little boy of about ten or eleven was sitting at the table in front of his typewriter. He couldn't see exactly who it was but he could soon fix that. Skinner snuck up on this mischievous boy and intended to grab him when the boy started typing something on the typewriter.

_Skinner raised his arms to grab the boy but as he took another step forward he tripped up from his tied up shoe laces_. And sure enough Skinner had just fallen over because his shoe laces had been somehow untied and become tied up to each other. He got up again and was careful to take minor steps towards him this time.

"Young man, what do you think you're doing in my house?" Skinner said as he reached out for him again.

"Just doing something 'de'structive!" said the boy. That voice sounded familiar but it was being distorted somehow so he couldn't tell with certainty who it really was, the boy began typing again.

_As Skinner prepared to pounce__ a dirty used diaper flew through the air and smacked him in the face. _Thud! As Skinner fell over from the impact and removed the filthy smelling diaper from his face and the boy laughed hysterically.

The boy spun around to face him. He did look familiar but his big green mask, large red eyes and strange hairs style meant he couldn't quite recognise him. Skinner reached out and managed to grab him by the shoulders.

"Alright boy!" he said as he put a hand behind his neck and grabbed at the stupid green mask. "I've had enough of this monkey business, time to see who you are" he pulled on the mask as hard as he could.

A rubber green mask came away in his hands but what lay under it was… a screaming gorilla's head? Perplexed but not deterred since this was another stupid mask Skinner removed that one too. Another mask was under that! It was of that stupid cartoon mouse from that violent TV show. He pulled off that mask and under that one was a mask of… himself?

"Hello I'm Seymour STINKER" the boy spoke imitating 'his' voice, and rather well he had to admit! He was getting impatient as he removed that mask, and the mask after that and that, how many did he have on? He'd already pulled off a handful of masks and each time one was removed the boy adopted a different guise with an imitation of their voices somehow, he's already removed ones which look like...

Krusty the Clown, he imitated the clowns laugh

Apu "Thank you come again"

Super Intendment Chalmers "SKINNNNNER!"

Homer Simpson "D'oh!"

Mr. Burns "EXCELLENT" he said drumming his fingers together

He pulled off that mask and it looks like finally he found the last one because there was a boy under this one who looked exactly like… "Martin Prince?" he said out loud.

"Oh you got me, snot bucket!" the boy said, before quickly ripping even that guise off to reveal, that first green mask he'd removed from his face. "Got ya!" he said. How did he get that green mask back?

"How many masks do you have on?" Skinner asked still holding the boy tightly by the shoulders

"Oh, that's nothing" the boy said yawning "Watch this!" and with that he grabbed hold of his upper and lower jaw in his hands and pulled. The green mask shifted, no wait, oh god! His entire face peeled away revealing a bloody skull with popping red eyes, its jaw yammered up and down as it screamed at him.

Skinner screamed like a girl, let go of the boy in terror and he took a few steps back and fell down the hole in the floor he managed to avoid the first time. The boy laughed hysterically.

Spotting a phone across the room the boy rubbed his hands together. He had a suitable mischievous idea as he crossed the room in a flash picked up the phone and begun to dial.

* * *

Meanwhile in Moes Tavern...

Moe the troll of a man who usually served Homer is daily shots of beer was working at the bar cleaning one of the dirty glasses. His customers were getting a little too over excited over the pool table as Homer Simpson tried to win a bet to see how many balls he could fit into his mouth without choking. He knew this wasn't going to end well so he had the ambulance on speed dial. Homer was too valuable a customer to lose.

Ring, Ring went the phone at the bar and Moe immediately picked up and answered

"Moes Tavern" he said

"I'm looking for a mister 'Ta'stiffy' first name 'Igot'" said the caller.

"One moment I'll check" said Moe as he turned to his customers at the bar

"Igot Ta'stiffy, is Igot Ta'stiffy here? Hey everybody back there, settle down will you? Igot Ta'stiffy!"

Everyone around the bar suddenly burst out laughing and pointing at him for some reason… _Wait a minute…_ Moe thought _Igot Ta'stiffy… I've gotta stiffy?_

"Why that little!" he heard a loud hysterical laugh coming from the phone, it was him that stupid little kid who keeps calling him!

"Listen you, when I get hold of you I'll ram my fist so far down your mouth I'll pull the label off your underpants!" he shouted in a rage.

"Now that's not a bad thing to try" said the voice as, for once the kid hung up first. Moe slammed the phone down as hard as he could in annoyance.

* * *

The boy continued to laugh hysterically as Skinner came back up from the basement again and carefully avoided the holes he already fell down as he approaches the boy again, arms outstretched in a menacing way ready to strike.

The boy turned around to face him stuck out his tongue and did a road runner impression "Meep Meep!" before quickly avoiding Skinner as his arms tried to grab him and leapt over his back opened the door and disappeared outside. Skinner of course opened the door and followed him out halfway down the path to his house before he stopped, no doubt he wanted Skinner to follow him which meant he had another trap waiting. He could see the mischievous child standing on the street.

"And stay out!" Skinner yelled as he turned around to go back into the house. Or he tried to turn around. He couldn't move his feet, they were stuck firmly to the cement path which lead to his house. He tried to remove his feet but they weren't coming away at all. He slipped his feet out of his shoes and took a step forward in his socks, they became stuck as well! What the heck? He pulled hard and his feet left his socks and he continued on in his bare feet but he only took one step when his feet became stuck again and no matter how hard he tried to move he couldn't get them unstuck.

He looked up at the green faced boy, it had to be his doing, and he was right as he saw the boy hold up a small tube, on the side of which said 'Fast Drying Super Glue'.

In all his years as a school principle he'd never met a child so unruly, he made Bart look like an angel. The boy suddenly had a water gun in his hands –where the heck did that come from?- he pointed it squarely at Skinner and a high pressure jet of liquid squirted out the nozzle and hit him in the face. Skinner held up his hands to shield himself from the liquid, which had a very pungent smell to it. Only when the spraying stopped did he have the chance to ask.

"What is this stuff, water?"

"It was water this morning!" he boy replied showing his row of large white teeth, the expression told Skinner whatever this stuff was it wasn't simply water.

"Wait until I get in contact with your parents!" he shouted at him as he struggled to get his feet free, but the boy just fell over laughing.

"Bart Simpson!" he screamed.

"Huh?" the boy stopped laughing as he heard the name

"…is an angel compared to you" he finished.

"Seymour! What are you doing shouting like that?" his mother shouted down

"Just a young punk mother, I can handle it" he shouted back up

"Yeah right, you couldn't handle puberty!" said mother's shouts and the boy doubled over laughing again. Why did she have to embarrass him in public like this?

He felt a chill run up his spine and when he looked down he noticed his clothes were all missing all of them, they were gone! He looked up at that green faced boy and saw he was holding his suit and shirt in his hands. How did he manage to get them off him without him noticing?

"I just skinned, Skinner" he said as he threw the clothes behind a bush before turning around and running away faster then Skinners eyes could keep up with.

Skinner struggled in vain to get his feet unstuck. He was in a serious strange position stuck outside facing his own house at 10pm at night in nothing but his birthday suit standing completely still, in the freezing cold. He struggled to get free, if the police ever found him like this he was certain they wouldn't understand the situation he was in.

He heard the unmistakable noise of police sirens coming from a distance.

"Uh oh!" was all he could mutter.

* * *

Milhouse watched as Bart put the receiver down on a pay phone and then burst into laughter and fell to the floor and continued to laugh hysterically. They'd just told the police there was a streakier outside Skinners house and when they turned up they would find a streakier alright.

"What did you do Bart?" he asked, eager to know what went on but Bart just kept laughing hysterically. He did get up to his feet but continued to laugh like a maniac. Suddenly his lower jaw disconnected from his skull and landed on the ground and he still kept laughing.

Milhouse took a step back, this was all getting too weird for him as he saw Bart pick up his lower jaw and connect it back into his skull with a crunch.

"I saw a little of what you did through Skinners window. How were you able to do all those things?" he had to ask, he had to know "Do you think you could teach me?" he asked eagerly.

"Woah there, Milhouse" he said holding up his hands "A Prank Master never reveals his secrets." With in a flash he was standing next to Milhouse with one arm over his shoulders.

"But I'll let you in on a secret buddy" he reached up and grabbed at that green mask he was wearing and pulled at it. The Mask came away from his face and held about 20 inches from his face, but it didn't fully detach. The front looked like something solid was concealed in the rubber trying to break out, it looked like a solid looking mask with some sort of metal bar running halfway down the middle. The rest of the rubber stuff snaked around the back of his head and was holding on quite tightly. Through the gaps in the rubber, which started to appear. he could see Bart's real face winking at him. Bart let go and the Mask smacked back onto his face. Whatever that solid thing was inside the rubber mask it had apparently vanished now and merged in with the rest of it.

"It's all to do with this mask" Bart explained "I don't know how, maybe Lisa would understand. But it gives me the power to do everything I've always wanted to do"

"Cool!" Milhouse exclaimed, maybe Bart would give him a try with it, after all he was his best friend "Can I have a go?" he asked eagerly again, but Bart pushed him away gently.

"Maybe later Milhouse, but first the night is young and I've got pranks to pull!" and with that Bart swung his leg up in one direction then in the next his form zoomed off into the night faster then Milhouse could keep up.

"I'll just wait here for my turn then!" he shouted after him. He lifted his arm up so he could see his watch 10:25pm, he now stood alone in the cold darkness waiting for when he could have a go with that mask.

* * *

Meanwhile back at Moes Tavern…

Ring Ring! Went the phone and Moe picked it up again

"Moes Tavern" he said in a bored voice into the receiver.

"I'm looking for a Mr. 'E. Willey', first name 'Flop'" the caller said

"One moment I'll check" he said turning to his customers "Flop E. Willey, is there a Flop E. Willey here?" none of his regulars were called that so he said "Hey would someone check the mens room for a Flop E. Willey?"

Everyone around the bar burst out laughing and pointed at him again, he also heard a very distinctive laugh coming from the phone.

_Wait a minute…_ Moe suddenly realized '_Floppy Willey?'_

Moe cringed as he realized this "AHH! Twice in one night?"

* * *

**To Be Continued…**

* * *

**Authors notes:** I considered leaving out the Moes Tavern bits because I felt I'd have to introduce the character of Moe and what he's like, but I decided everyone who's going to read this will have seen the Simpsons anyway which is why Moe doesn't have the same amount of back story as I've given the other characters.

I'm not going to let Barts Mask get too violent… just yet

If you like this story, why not review it so I know how well its going?


	7. The Mask of Loki

**Chapter 6**

The Mask of Loki

Blackness, darkness and maybe the sound of movement from a different room, probably Homer trying to put his pants back on again. Bart's head was resting on a pillow and he was wrapped up in his warm bed sheets. That was the best dream he'd ever had, he'd lived his fantasies of pranking Skinner with an ultimate prank, it was perfect, and he prank called Moes twice in one night. That was a great dream but that's the trouble with dreams, they're always dreams, Bart thought to himself. You always have to wake up in the real world and continue your life by life's rules.

He must've fallen asleep as he went through the final preparations of planning for the pranks he was going to pull on Skinner in the real world, which means he didn't do those great pranks he had in mind for the real Skinner and like all those great pranks he did to the Skinner in his dream and all the other great stuff he did during the night, they didn't actually happen. His mouth curled up in a smile as he remembered what else he did in the dream but he knew when he opened his eyes he'll see that everything as it was before the dream started, before he put that mask on.

He opened his eyes and saw nothing but white for a minute, he closed his eyes again as they readjusted to the light. When he opened them again he saw the ceiling, the blank blue ceiling. He didn't want to get up he was too tired, way too tired to get up.

He closed his eyes again and rolled over onto his side, it was Monday he knew that, which meant it would be another school day. He 'so' didn't want to get up.

He felt a light cool breeze across his face and opened his eyes again to see what it was, the curtains were parted and the window was still open, when did he leave the window open? He wondered. Wait a minute, the window wasn't just open it also had a hole smashed into it, and what glass remained in the frame was fractured in a thousand places but that wasn't the most awkward thing about it though. The hole was in the shape of Bart as he was wearing that mask with the long spiky hair and everything.

Despite his tiredness his eyes grew wider and he sat up to see if it was real or just his imagination. That's when he took in more details of his room. Around the walls were shoe prints which had a similar pattern to the soles of his shoes, the ones he was wearing right now. Wait a minute, he went to sleep in his clothes as well? He'd realised, but that probably wasn't unusual if he'd fallen asleep sitting in a chair or lay on top of his bed but why would he tuck himself in while in his clothes?

He looked around the room and found even more oddities, the room was a mess, well that wasn't actually out of place but he'd never let his comic book collection of Radioactive-man issues be tipped out of their box and spread out all over the room like trash. This was exactly how he left his bedroom in that dream. But it was just a dream, wasn't it?

He leapt from his bed and quickly went over to a mirror over his chest of draws, it was covered in sticky labels for prank ideas. Bart quickly tore them all down and looked at his reflection, specifically his face. It was normal, normal skin colour, normal eye colour, normal hair colour and style and he had ears. It was a dream wasn't it? He wondered as he looked around the room again. Suddenly a thought came into his head, maybe this wasn't a dream after all. If it wasn't he was half relieved to be back to normal but also disappointed that he had all that power and lost it just as quickly.

But wait, all the power came from that mask Homer bought him. He suddenly had a strange sensation, a headache only with pictures… an idea! Maybe he only got those powers from that mask, maybe the reason his head and face turned green was because it didn't. It was just that mask. It did make sense since it did wrap around his head then the next thing he knew he had a big green head and super powers.

As he recalled the previous night more and more it all started to look like that dank little mask was really magic.

Cool! He thought as he turned around and began thinking of millions and millions of other things he could try with those powers, but then another thought occurred to him. Where was the mask? Where did he leave it? That was one of the things he couldn't remember. The last thing he recalled clearly was… he knew he did something to Jimbo Jones one of the school bullies. Whatever he did to him he knew it must've been good, but after that his memory failed. He didn't even remember how he got home and if he still even had the Mask when he did.

He frantically began looking around his bed, under the covers and his pillow before looking around the other corners of his bedroom, picking up any old junk, clothes anything that might be covering the magic mask and threw them out of the way trying to find that green piece of wood. He knew Milhouse wanted to wear it, but why would he let him wear what is probably the coolest mask 'ever'.

"Bart! What are you doing?" it was his moms voice, she had just come though the door without him noticing. She reached up over her head to the top of her tall, blue hair and pulled a pair of his boxer shorts out which had just been caught in it after Bart threw it out of the way. "That's not how you clean your room, put the things away" but before Marge could say anything else Bart had spun around and said "Mom, have you see what happened to that old wooden mask dad got me?"

"Oh Bart if you cleaned your room you'd never lose stuff like that" she began "It's time you got up anyway, it's nearly 1pm"

"One pm!" Bart yelped "Is that in the morning or afternoon?"

"It's the afternoon, you missed breakfast and lunch"

"Bart missed breakfast and lunch?" that was Homer who was passing the door at the time, he looked shocked as if this was the most un-human thing possible "but those are the most important 7 meals of the day along with dinner, supper, brunch, snacks, tea and drunk"

"Drinking beer is not a meal Homer" said Marge her expression showing she's not surprised the way Homer thinks.

"No but it makes prime rib taste all the better, MMMmmmm, prime rib, Augghhhh"

"Hmm" came Marge's groan as Homer walked out of the room. Marge turned to follow but just before she did she noticed the other stuff Bart was hoping she'd never notice, namely the feet marks all over the walls and the broken window at the far side of the room.

"Bart!" she said "What on earth have you been doing?"

"Redecorating?" he shrugged, maybe shrugging wasn't the best thing to do if he wanted it to sound convincing.

"Homer!" Marge called and Homer was back at the door in a flash.

"Yes Honey?" he said in a sweet voice as if he was actually the one in trouble.

"Have you seen the mess Bart's made?" Marge said

"Oh right" he said in relief "I thought you'd found out I blocked the toilet again"

"What?" Marge asked and Homer realised he'd said too much.

"Nothing!" he quickly said innocently

Marge moaned again suspicions still clear in her eyes. Whatever point she was trying to make with Homer she seemed to have changed her mind and turned back to Bart.

"Bart, clean up this room, you're grounded!" she said sternly

"But MOM!" he moaned, this wasn't really his fault, had he been in his right mind while wearing that thing he would never have broken the window. But words failed him, he couldn't tell her it was because of that mask. That would be like pooing your own pants, they'd take it away from him if they found out about it. Anyway it wasn't likely they'd believe him anyway.

"Don't 'BUT MOM' me" she said "Clean this mess up or you're grounded for a week!" She left the room and shut the door.

Cleaning up the room might actually not be a bad idea after all. Bart never thought he would think 'that' but it was, if his mask was still here then he's sure to find it if he tidies up his room.

Bart continued his search; he didn't remember taking the mask off himself so it must've come off by itself. But where the hell did the Mask go? He stopped as he picked up all the issues of Radioactive-man in his hands and something just clicked into his head. It was one pm in the afternoon? That was…

He had to think for a minute as he counted the hours…

A few hours after school should start and it was a Monday, shouldn't he be in school right now?

* * *

'Mysterious masked boy attacks and wrecks Springfield Elementary' was the title of the news article Lisa was reading on her computer.

'Springfield Elementary was attacked and wrecked last night by a young boy no older then twelve years of age. CCTV footage shows the single boy who managed to wreck the school with heavy tools he apparently managed to carry on his person.'

A picture in the article showed Springfield Elementary, only it was a wreck, windows were broken and the doors were blown off and the flag pole which usually flew the American flag had a pair of underpants rolled up it.

Several other photos showed the damage and destruction left in his wake. Lockers had been ripped open and had their contents spread all over the floor. The boys and girls toilets were overflowing and completely drenched as someone ripped out the sinks. Willies tractor had been crashed into the pool, which it said in the article had been filled with urine. The list just went on and on and on.

'Principle Seymour Skinner was unable to comment at this moment as he was caught literally with his trousers down when cops were called to his house to find him streaking in front of his own home. Seymour maintains his innocence's and claims it was a boy in a big green mask and a wild hair style who attacked him in his own home.

'This was identical to the description of the boy who attacked Springfield Elementary which 'lends credibility to his story' the police stated. 'and it is noted that the boy described is similar to 'Green Face' the green mask wearing man who attacked Chief Clancy Wiggum the night previous. However police suspect this is a copy cat attack rather then Green Face himself, though police are not ruling out the possibility that Green Face has kids

'The damage to Springfield Elementary has forced it to close its doors until the damage can be repaired, until then Springfields' Elementary students will have to seek alternative forms of study'

Lisa stopped reading right there, she didn't need to read on she got the gist of it. Bart had humiliated Skinner but more then that he'd wrecked the whole school. That made her so mad she wanted to strangle Bart, but instead she settled for making sure he never did it again, because in her hands was that strange wooden mask of his.

She noted it had a design which made it look like a Viking artefact with the metal bar running down the middle of it like on a Viking battle helmet, yet somehow this lump of wood managed to turn Bart into some sort of twisted version of a cartoon character.

Lisa turned the Mask over in her hands before gently putting it down on the table fearing it might try to attach itself to her face as well. It was easy to get the Mask away from Bart, she reasoned he'd return home at some point then she could get the Mask off his face, she stayed up all night for this purpose and she was right.

Bart returned home and went straight to bed, at which point it was practically dawn. She had waited just long enough for him to go to sleep before sneaking into his room to remove the Mask. But she discovered she didn't have to remove the Mask because it was already detached from his face and was back in its original hard wooden form embedded face down into Barts pillow with Bart himself fast asleep next to it. She retrieved the Mask without waking him and took it straight back to her room so she could get a good look at it.

She now wanted to find out what this thing was and if it had been seen before or not. Was it some sort of mutant from the nuclear plant or something else? She decided it wasn't anything form the nuclear plant, whatever it was it didn't get its properties through nuclear energy.

She decided that something this powerful should've come up somewhere else in the world at some point, in the news or papers or TV and she was going to see if this Mask or the creature it turns people into came up anywhere else.

She turned back to her computer and typed the words 'Viking Mask' into the search engine and was about to press enter, but she decided it was too vague there were loads of Viking masks out there and this one was specific. Instead she changed it so it said 'Magic Viking Mask' and pressed enter.

It still came up with millions of search results but Lisa began the long task of going through them. There was a site about 'Magic' costumes which was about a renting a Viking warrior costume, another site which was about a toy kit so you could create your own masks, another was even about a computer etching program for creating nano components for computer chips. However after a few minutes she decided this was getting her nowhere and changed the search to "Magic, Green, Viking, Mask" and pressed enter. Still nothing of value came up, in fact most of the pages she got were exactly the same pages she got before.

She picked up the Mask again and looked carefully, what could she say about it, what other distinctive markings did it have? Wait, the metal strip down the front. As well as having four equally spaced rivets connecting it to the wooden mask it also had a symbol on it. At the top of the strip was a circle with what was clearly a strangely shaped letter L on it.

She had serious doubts it would bring anything up but typed into the search engine "Magic, Viking, Green Mask" and "L shape" and pressed enter.

Again nothing coming close to what she wanted, until she came across a site called "Edge City Times" under the hyperlink were the words "The Green faced master criminal known as the Mask was…" it trailed off after that. She clicked on it and came to the _Edge City Times_ home page, this was an edition of the newspaper which was written in 1994 so it was very old.

'The green faced master criminal known as the Mask was apparently apprehended when a plan to blow up the Coco bongo club was foiled by former Mask suspect Stanley Ipkiss. Ipkiss has since been cleared of all charges when the Mask was revealed to be Dorian Tyrell, a local gangster who was the initial suspect of the Edge City bank robbery a few nights previous.'

The article went on 'The Mask is the name given to Tyrell when he and his gang members robbed the Edge City Bank. Tyrell disguised his appearance with a bright yellow suit and a big green mask'

Ah now this sounded more like it, Lisa thought as she read on.

'Tyrell escaped when the police showed up at the bank. A shootout occurred in which several were wounded and three killed. Tyrell was later apprehended by police an hour later at the Coco Bongo club however he was released on bail.

'The following night 'the Mask' turned up again in Landfill Park and reportedly preformed a dance routine with the help of the local swat teams. The event was captured on film which was later declared a forgery by police. The Mask was also known to perform certain feats which would be physically impossible. Eye witnesses describe _the Mask_ as performing an unusual dance with local star Tina, though eye witness reports though similar were dismissed as either tricks of the light or simple magic tricks preformed by Dorian Tyrell.'

This sounded like what Bart turned into she thought as she scrolled down and showed a picture of '_the Mask_' it was in black and white but it showed a man in a big balled mask with no ears, his mouth was smirking showing a pair of large white teeth. This was very similar to what Bart had turned into, which either means there is more than one of these masks or this was the same one that caused all this mayhem in Edge City.

On one side of the web page there was a small box which said 'related stories' she clicked on it. Most were repeats of what she had already read but one caught her eye. It had apparently happened a few years later at Edge City's museum.

'Chaos struck the Edge City museum last night when a late night guided tour turned into a shootout between security guards and a lone figure. Unfortunately the security guards are in no position to comment, though eye witness reports said a man in a long leather coat and matching hat preformed a light show and turned himself into a green skinned monster. At first police suspected this to be the return of _the Mask_, a previous criminal who also used lights and effects to portray himself as a human cartoon character.

'Dr Arthur Neumann, the tour guide through the exhibits was unfortunately unable to comment at the time. Though police have revealed the individual took an interest in one of the exhibits and attempted to steal it. A model of the 'Mask of Loki''

The picture below showed exactly what Lisa was looking for, it was the Mask, their Mask! It looked almost exactly like the Mask on her desk, except the paint was different but it was the same shape and size, that was defiantly it.

'The individual declared that the model was indeed a fake and threw it away before fleeing the scene of the crime'

Lisa immediately left the web page and returned to the search engine, there she typed in the words 'Mask of Loki' and pressed enter. However the results were not very fruitful, some links mentioned Loki as a Viking God but nothing else.

She wasn't getting far with _the Mask of Loki_, there was hardly any mention of it anywhere nor was there any a mention of a resurfacing of the man called _the Mask_ at all, this appeared to be it. She turned her attention to the one place that was sure to know about this, the Edge City Museum. She typed in the name and got onto their home page, however all the exhibits had since changed and _the Mask of Loki_, or anything to do with Vikings had moved on.

There was one last thing she could try, Dr. Arthur Neumann, the one who lead the private tour guide the night of that attack on the museum, surely he knew more about this Mask of Loki then anyone. She typed in his name and found him immediately. Dr. Arthur Neumann, the author of "the Masks we Wear" she quickly checked his profile to see if this was the same man and it turned out it was. Lisa then clicked to send him an e-mail and began typing quickly.

_Dear Dr. Arthur __Neumann_

_I have an interest in Norse Mythology and I have recently come into possession of an object which resembles the Mask of Loki, an object you once had as a display in the Edge City Museum. I am currently working on a project about Norse Mythology and the Mask of Loki sounds like an interesting subject however I am unable to locate any information on the Mask of Loki. Since you had it on display in the museum I was wondering if you could share some information about it?_

_Regards_

_Lisa Simpson_

She read it through once and deciding it contained everything required she hit the send key. Now all she had to do was wait for a reply.

She heard slamming doors from Barts room. He was awake at last and probably looking for his Mask. For the good of Springfield she can't let Bart get his hands back on this Mask again and it was only a matter of time before he decided to take other rooms of the house apart to find it.

She was planning on spending some time in the Springfield Public Library today since Springfield Elementary was closed but she didn't feel it was safe leaving the Mask here for Bart to find. She'd have to bring it with her.

She shut off her computer, picked up her back pack and placed some books in she was planning to return, but also left a little room in it so she could carry the Mask inside it as well.

She zipped up the bag and swung it on her back and left her room. She sneaked by Barts room -the noise coming from it sounded like he was turning it upside down- went down stairs and out the front door and continued to walk towards town. Each step she took she knew she was a little safer because each step separated Bart from this magic Mask of Loki.

* * *

Green, greenery, green, the endless sea of green was all Monty Burns could see out of the window of his office at the power plant. In the distance the endless sea of trees and somewhere in there is that Big Green Headed Beaver that built that dam and nearly cost his plant millions of dollars. Nobody gets money out of Monty Burns, not even nature itself. Which is why he's going to spend millions of dollars to tear down that forest and turn each tree into a single toothpick, that'll show mother nature who's boss.

"Smithers!" he called out and his assistant was by his side in a flash

"Yes sir?" he said

"Smithers, put out a memo that Monty Burns is going to start a logging company." He said not taking his eyes off the forest outside his office, his enemy "and get in contact with that logger Derek, he is going to be in charge!"

"But Mr. Burns" Smithers interrupted "you already formulated that team weeks ago"

"I eer, did what now?" Burns turned to Smithers confused

"You created Burns' logging company about two or three weeks ago" Smithers explained "and when the EPA ordered the lake to be cleaned you set them to work cutting down the forest"

He was getting forgetful in his old age Burns decided, but at least it meant he formulated the plan ahead of himself. "Then get me Derek on the phone" he ordered trying to pave over his moment of forgetfulness and forget it.

"Right away sir" Smithers said picking up the phone and dialling the number of the Burns logging company. When he heard it ringing he put the phone up to Burns ear so Burns didn't have to hold the phone himself.

"Hello, Dereks' Cell" said the logger

"Derek, I want to see you in my office, NOW" he said

"I know Mr. Burns, I'm in it" Burns' eyes went wide again as he swivelled in his chair to face Derek who was indeed in the room already. "You said you wanted to see me" he continued speaking into his mobile.

"So I did" Burns said waving at Smithers to remove the phone from his ear, which he did. Derek was quite a large man in a red shirt and jeans with a pair of trouser braces holding them up and on his head he wore a yellow hard hat. He also had quite a bushy beard and moustache. Did all loggers have to look like that? "How is the progress on operation Whack Mother Nature coming?"

"We are ready to start, however someone... keeps delaying us" Derek said, he suddenly became very nervous. Monty Burns did not like delays.

"Hang the delays! I want that forest gone" Burns shouted "Who's causing the delays? Whoever it is just kill them"

"Sir, you're causing the delays" Derek explained "You keep calling me back here asking how things are going"

"I see" Burns said almost as if this hadn't registered to him "carry on then and don't come back until that forest and any Giant Green Headed Beavers you find are dead"

Derek nodded and quickly left the room without another word

"Sir" asked Mr. Smithers "just to ask do you really think it's a good idea for us to destroy Springfield forest? The Environmental Protection Agency were already annoyed when you polluted that lake next to the power plant"

"They get annoyed when a pig takes a large dump in Springfield Lake, you can't make them happy." Burns said, oh how he hated tree huggers "The only way to get them off my back is to remove the environment all together. No environment, no protection agency"

"Very well planned out sir" Smithers said as he placed an affectionate hand on Burns' shoulder "very well planned out" he repeated. Burns turned to look at him with an piercing stare of annoyance on his face before looking at Smithers hand. Getting the hint, Smithers removed his hand from his bosses shoulder.

* * *

This was ridicules! Lisa thought as she read the article. Not satisfied with destroying the Great Beaver Dam, Burns now wants to destroy Springfield forest, because that's where the Green Headed Beaver's lived and where the beavers got the wood to build the dam. It was a crime against nature, it was a crime full stop!

The EPA stepped in when Burns was polluting the lake so why weren't they stepping in to stop the destruction of the forest? It was home to the Green Headed Beaver, a new species probably endangered that would make it protected. But then she sighed she knew there wasn't enough evidence to prove this Green Headed Beaver even existed, after all it had only been seen a handful of times then it vanished, never to be seen again. It's just regarded as a myth and therefore doesn't really exist like Bigfoot, the Loch Ness Monster or Michael Jacksons' nose.

'Green Headed?' this suddenly got some of the wheels and gears turning in her head as she remembered the so called _Mask of Loki_. Humans could wear it, what about animals? Could the Green Headed Beaver actually just be an ordinary beaver wearing the Mask? It made sense.

While she was on the computer Lisa decided to check her e-mails to see if Dr. Neumann had replied to her e-mail yet. Unfortunately he hadn't replied yet. Lisa sighed and looked down at the Mask on her desk and the Mask just stared back at her. She got the creepy feeling it was really 'looking at' her and knowing what it could do made that slight upturned smile on it all the more unnerving and creepy, as if it was enjoying the perplexed look on Lisa's face.

Part of her brain which tried to find a rational explanation for problems was coming up blank when it came to this Mask. There was no simple explanation what Bart did while wearing it, it was physically impossible and there was no type of trickery she could think of.

She sighed again, she hadn't found much information about _the Mask of Loki_ at the library either, the only thing she managed to find out was that Loki was a Norse night god of Mischief. She assumed this was the correct Loki since the Mask had a Viking like design, but Loki could've been someone else entirely. Dr. Neumann was her last hope for any information about the Mask.

When she got back from the library she found Bart had tipped even her bedroom upside down looking for the Mask but it looked like he had been interrupted. Mom must've spotted him while he was searching.

Unfortunately Bart caught up with her as soon as she came back and wanted to know if she had his mask. She freighted ignorance of course but that didn't stop him going into her back pack when she slipped it off her shoulders. However Lisa had been clever enough to hide the Mask at the bottom of the bag between two large books and put a few shorter books on top of it to make it look like a bag full of large books. At the sight of such large books Bart dropped the bag almost in disgust and was convinced that's all that was in there. When he left her room she made sure to lock the door by placing her chair up against the door knob.

She spent the rest of the day reading up on interesting things like, the history of the Native Americans and their unfair prosecution by the early Americans. Bart had apparently given up his search for the Mask and appeared to be sulking at dinner because he couldn't find it. Even though he sounded like he had given up his search, Lisa made sure to finish her dinner before Bart, without making it seem like she was trying to finish before him. She returned to her bedroom and sealed it again with the chair under the door knob before returning to her studies.

It wasn't until the end of the day when her full attention returned to the Mask of Loki again. She reached forward and picked it up and held it in both hands so it faced her. For something which caused all that chaos last night it was now just sitting calmly in her fingers, completely inert. You would think something so powerful would give off a radioactive glow or something, a warning saying 'this contains power', but it just looked like a piece of green, slightly mouldy wood.

She probably held in her hands the single most destructive thing on the planet. Destructive only if Bart wore it, but surely if the right person were to wear it then that person could do great good. For example, herself, she was a Buddhist after all it's in her nature to be calm and focused about things, though she didn't know much about it she didn't need to know much to know what it does.

She turned the Mask over in her fingers so she faced the inside, breathing heavily she slowly brought it to her face. This was the ultimate test, if it transformed her then it was real, if not then there's probably some other explanation somewhere. She closed here eyes and waited for something to happen. Her face made contact with the cold wooden surface…

Nothing happened, she opened her eyes and removed her hands from the Mask. It fell off and landed on the floor with a clunk. She knelt down and picked it up and placed it on her face again but pressed down on it hard. Still nothing, the only feeling she was getting was the crevices in the wood imprinting on her skin.

She got up and still holding the Mask to her face she went over to her mirror and felt stupid. The Mask hadn't changed her at all, it hadn't even changed itself. Her eyes just stared straight back at her through the eye holes of the green mask. That slight smile on it was fast becoming more annoying as if it was laughing at her for falling for a stupid trick.

A glare reflected off the mirror caught her attention but before she got over excited she realised it wasn't the Mask, it was just the setting sun in her mirror which was shining from between two houses across the street.

Turning her attention back to the Mask she signed, she was wrong. What was she thinking? What she saw Bart do last night must've been a trick of some sort and she had fallen for it. She felt really, really stupid and that stupid grin on the Mask just became more and more annoying.

Lisa removed her hands from her face and signed. _Wait a minute!_ She thought, she had removed her hands but the Mask hadn't dropped off like before, it was still attached to her face.

She reached up and hooked her fingers around the metal 'nose' and gently tugged, it wasn't come off. She tried again, harder but still it remained attached. Hooking her fingers around the edge she tried to pull it off. There was a strange sensation on her face as she felt the wood begin to become more flexible and was even starting to wrap around her head, pushing her fingers out of the way as its edges extended over her ears. In desperation she gave one final heave and the Mask came off her face with an audible ripping sound as if she had just pealed something sticky off her face.

What had just happened? She thought as she regained her composure. Did the Mask start taking effect?

She looked into its eyes as if expecting it to look back at her, she then noticed the room was gradually getting darker. The sun was going down so she'd have to turn the lights on to get a better look. But before she made a move and as if it had read her mind the Mask produced some light of its own. In the crevices of the wood grain came a faint green glow which spread around the entire inside of the Mask before fading away to nothing. That was the sort of glow she was expecting from something so powerful.

Her eyes widened and her mouth dropped open. She felt calm, serene but she should be feeling shocked or at least curious. Her arms began to buckle bringing the Mask closer to her face but she was sure it wasn't really 'her' doing the moving, it was as if the Mask had taken control of her arms. But no it wasn't completely the Mask's fault she admitted she had a slight desire to put it on for herself some reason, to try it out, she didn't know why but…

As she tried to reason everything in her head she failed to notice that it was now too late to stop it. The Mask had made contact with her face and was already wrapped around her pointy hair. Coming to her senses she desperately tried to remove it, feeling around the back for a weakness, any weakness she could use to get it off but it had already curled around her head and connected together at the back of her head.

Everything then happened so fast, too fast for her to comprehend. The entire room was spinning faster then she could comprehend. No the room wasn't spinning, she was! Every hair on her head tried to stand up on end and she felt her body fill with an energy she'd never experienced before, but she also felt cold as a great wind blew around her as her body began to spin faster and faster.

When all this came to a sudden stop she realised immediately she was not who she was a few seconds ago.

* * *

To be Continued…

* * *

**Authors Notes:**

I welcome reviews of any sort.


	8. Giving Nature a Helping Hand

**Authors notes:** I really wanted to release this chapter in time for Halloween –you'll see why when you read it ;)- Oh well, the Simpsons Halloween special this year won't be show until November 7th so who's counting? :D

This is also were some of the horror elements of this story come in.

-Enjoy

* * *

**Chapter 7**

Giving Nature a Helping Hand

10:00pm, Derek sighed as he looked at his watch. Ten pm, it's a good thing Burns pays good money, he thought as he sat in a trailer on the forest demolition site drinking strong black coffee. If Burns didn't pay such good cash Derek would've turned down the job and the position, not because of the job itself that's not what bothered him, it was the hours they had to work. Burns wanted this whole forest clearing in a matter of days something Derek would say was impossible unless they worked around the clock and he just knew when the job was finished he was going to be completely insane from sleep deprivation, that and the taste of this very strong coffee, it was vulgar but it kept him awake. He really needed sleep, but the schedule Burns wanted them to stick to was almost impossible.

He pinched the bridge of his nose and breathed a deep sigh, his mind was starting to think in circles. All he could think of as he stared at his black coffee was sleep, sleep, sleep, sleep. He needed sleep. Derek breathed another sigh and drained his coffee mug, it was time to get back to work. He got up from his chair and left the 'break trailer' as they called it.

He breathed in the cold, fresh night air which woke him up much more effectively then black coffee.

Outside was the stretch of forest they were now working on, it should be in pitch blackness however they had lit up the site using search lights so they had enough light to work. To improve their chances of bringing down the forest by the appointed deadline they brought in a heavy bulldozer. The sooner the forest was down the sooner Burns would be happy. Once every tree lay on the ground they could take their time removing the logs, Burns didn't care about how long it took to remove the logs as long as the forest was down, and if they spotted any Green Headed Beavers they were given permission to shoot them on sight. So far though they'd only seen ordinary beavers which were greated by moans of disappointment from some of the trigger happy hillbillies in his work force.

The forest was quite large so it would take them three or four days of working around the clock to bring it all down. He had the feeling if Burns could, he would've blown the forest up with dynamite however no one was willing to sell the stuff to Burns after the last time when the factories delivery truck was blown up on the day Burns brought down the Great Beaver Dam.

Their time saving bulldozer stood in the middle of the area ready to begin another round of tree smashing. Several workers were sitting on the caterpillar tracks still on their break. Derek would have to fix that. He walked up to them and barked out.

"Hey, breaks over! Back to work!"

The workers uttered the usual moans and groans of a work force not used to working night shifts as they finished their coffee, leapt down, picked up their tools and walked away to resume working. The only one who didn't get off the dozer was a skinny man called Michael. The reason he didn't get off was because only he and Derek were qualified to drive the dozer.

_Dozer_, Derek thought, he really wanted to be dozing right about now. He shook his head to clear it, he couldn't think about sleep now he had work to do.

"I wanna hear 'timber' sounding every minute of the night!" he shouted out to the work force as he climbed onto the bulldozer while Michael started her up. The engine roared to life as Derek sat down in the driving seat and put it into drive gear. He had his eye on one tree in particular, it was very large and tough but not tough enough to survive the dozer he bet. He and Michael had placed bets before they went on their break on whether or not the heavy dozer would bring it down in one go. Derek knew it would and he intended to bring it down, he had one hundred bucks riding on this.

Derek drove the bulldozer forward and moved into position so he could get a clean run that would bring it down. A bulldozer wasn't designed with this type of work in mind but it always worked to bring down trees fast. It sped towards the tree at a slow ten miles an hour, Michael operated the scoop controls so the scoop was raised to give greater pushing power and then... The dozer came to a complete stopped? The engine was still going the tracks were turning but the heavy machine was going nowhere.

"What the heck?" Derek said aloud as he tried to increase speed but the tracks just spun around and around.

"Are we stuck in the mud?" asked Michael

"It's a bulldozer not a hatchback!" Derek said as he put more even speed to the tracks but still the bulldozer didn't move.

"Hey Michael, jump out and see what's happened" Derek said.

Michael stepped off the bulldozer and let himself fall to the ground, the fall was much more than he expected however. He landed, lost his footing and fell over landing face first on the muddy floor with a splat. Michael slowly got up and scooped out the mud over his eyes with his fingers before wiping off as much as he could.

"Stop playing in the mud!" Derek barked "what's wrong?" Michael turned around to see why the tracks weren't getting any traction on the ground. They were turning but… but they were sitting on what looked like a giant treadmill rotating in the opposite direction.

"Huh?" he uttered as he moved closer to it, to make sure it wasn't a trick of the light he pulled out his flash light and illuminated what he thought was a giant treadmill, and it was a giant treadmill! "Where did this come from?" he said out loud.

He spotted just below the rotating track was the off switch which he pressed down knowing full well how bizarre the current situation was, but if a switch said it turned it off he was going to press it. The treadmill came to a sudden stop and the bulldozer shot forward and made contact with the tree with a loud crash. The dozer tilted upward as it began to push the thing over. Derek waited for the cracking of bark and branches and the immediate return to terra firma. But that didn't happen, the dozer wasn't bringing the tree down, instead it mounted it! His view of the world around him began shifting as the dozer actually started climbing up the tree!

_What__ in the name of?_ Derek thought as he looked over the sides and felt the direction of gravity shift. The tracks were rolling on the surface of the tree as if it was actually the ground, but that was impossible, the tree should break and fall with a ground shaking bang. But for some strange reason that simply wasn't happening, it was climbing the tree and was perfectly perpendicular to the ground. The heavy bulldozer should at least fall down, impact the ground and flip over, but thinking on that point he preferred that scenario not happen at all. Derek looked back and saw the ground slowly begin to recede away from him as the dozer began climbing further and further up.

"What the heck is going on?" he shouted down

"Stop the engine, Derek!" he heard Michael shout back.

Derek turned the key and the dozer came to a complete stop. He regretted turning it off when a thought came into his mind. What if keeping the thing in drive and the engine running was the only thing keeping him on the tree? If he fell from this height he'd die, crushed under his own machine. But for some reason the bulldozer was standing still on the side of the tree as if this was entirely natural to it.

He looked down and guessed he was at the height of a 2 story building. He kept a tight grip on the controls of the bulldozer because these machines didn't come with seatbelts so there was technically nothing holding him in his chair.

"Derek, bring it back down!" Michael shouted up.

"How?" Derek shouted back nervousness creeping into his voice, he dare not touch any of the controls in case the heavy machine remembered it wasn't supposed to do this.

"I don't know" Michael admitted "Try popping it into reverse!"

Despite being afraid of the thing falling back to earth if he touched any of the controls Derek turned the key in the ignition, if he put her in reverse maybe she'd simply roll back down the tree. He turned the key and was met with a chocking noise as the engine failed to start. He turned the key again and it just chocked and chocked but refused to cough to life, obviously because all the fuel was shifted right to the back of the tank where the engine couldn't use it. If only they gassed up before doing this run.

"Wait a minute" Michael called up "Let me get the manual for it"

Michael walked back towards the trailer they doubled for an office and went inside

"Where did you leave it?" Michael called

Derek didn't answer because he was certain something odd was happening, his vision of the trailer was begging to rotate and a creaking noise confirmed that the tree was coming down to earth very slowly, but he was half panicked about what would happen when the impact came while he was up this high.

It was odd, but the tree wasn't gaining speed as it fell. It just kept falling at the same rate which was good news for him because it meant the landing would be soft, but it baffled him to why it was falling so slowly in the first place.

But this wasn't right! He thought as he looked down at the trunk of the tree. It wasn't snapping or breaking, more sort of stretching like it was made of rubber and looking over the front of the dozer's scoop he could see the top of the tree being pulled down to one specific point on the ground as if there was something far heavier on the end of it. The dozer wasn't causing the tree to bend like this so it must be something else.

The movement stopped at last and Derek breathed a sigh of relief. Even though the dozer was technically righted now it was still a good few feet off the ground supported only by the tree itself, but Derek was just glad to be closer to the ground. If he got some of the workers to cut the trunk with a chainsaw it would bring this stubborn tree down the rest of the way. Derek then decided to get a good look at what was sitting on the top of the tree causing the tree to bend like this. He got up and looked over the scoop of the dozer again and was met with a pair of red eyes which sat in the sockets of a big green head. He yelped in surprise and fell back into his seat. Was that a Green Headed Beaver?

"This is where you get off" said a menacing distorted voice. _Wait a minute, beavers didn't talk_ he thought as he stood up again to see the green headed creature. Whatever it was it looked like it was holding onto the top of the tree with some effort and by the look of the thing, it was defiantly human.

"Get off?" Derek asked, he admitted the red eyes had disturbed him when he first saw them and some of that surprise translated into how he asked that question.

"Get off the bulldozer!" it warned again. The lights of the dozer allowed Derek to see who the menacing eyes belonged to with more detail. It was a girl, just a little girl in a big green Halloween mask. She had one short arm over the top of the tree and appeared to be pretending she was holding it down herself. Obviously she couldn't have done this on her own so who managed to do it and why? When he got his hands on them they'll pay for this little trick.

"Halloweens over kid, get out of here before you get hurt" Derek said.

"I ought to remind you of the laws of 'circular motion'" she said "so far this tree has potential energy stored in its trunk, energy which will be transformed into kinetic energy as soon as I release these branches."

To prove her point she let the branches slip from her grasp a little and the tree bucked as if it was about to throw the dozer away. "...and seeing as you are so far up it, the centrifugal force applied to your bulldozer as the tree swings back into place would throw it ohhh..." she looked like she was mulling it over "about a mile or two, so if you don't want to join it... GET- OFF – THE –BULL- DOZER!" she fixed him with a very menacing look.

She let the tree slip further from her grasp and panicking Derek leapt from the dozer onto the muddy ground and turned in time to see the girl release the tree. It snapped back upright in a matter of seconds with a whipping sound and Derek watched as his bulldozer was launched into the air and vanished off into the night sky.

Derek couldn't believe what he had just seen. His 2 and a half tone bulldozer had just been fired into the air by a tree catapult set up by a little girl of no older than eight.

He turned to the masked little girl. Her big green head sported a length of blond hair arranged in points which were bent back away from her face making it look like her head was covered in yellow shark fins. Her eyes were large with red irises and her teeth were far too large for her jaws. She wore a dress of a deep blood red with matching sandals, this seemed to be the only normal thing about her.

Without anyone else to plausibly blame for this strange scene which just occurred he vented his frustration on her since she apparently wanted it to look like she caused it.

"Do you know how much that cost me?" he shouted at her

"Hmm" she considered his rhetorical question "$109,454 and 99 cense"

Derek was speechless, that was exactly right, how could she know that? But his surprise quickly dissolved back into anger.

"You're gonna have to pay for it, how else am I gonna bulldoze this property in time?" but the girl didn't look the least bit intimidated and just as he had finished that sentence the girl gave him a look of crazed annoyance which served to make her distorted voice even more spooky.

"This property belongs to Mother Nature" her eyes actually glowed a fierce shade of red "it's the only vestige of greenery in this stinking muck hole called Springfield!"

The scene with the bending tree and catapulted bulldozer had drawn in a large crowd of his workers who now gathered around to observe the large Derek and the little girl in a shouting competition.

Derek had enough of this he decided and reached out to grab the girl with the intention of removing her from the property, but with surprising speed the girl managed to avoid his hands and with even more surprising speed the she leapt up and grabbed his collar and pulled him down forcing his back to arch so he was down to her level to look into those red angry looking eyes which continued to glow a spookily shade of crimson. She pressed the forehead of her green rubber mask onto his so their eyes looked directly into each others, her eyes burned in fury and her teeth were tightly clenched together.

"You know" she said with a fury that Derek thought a girl of eight would not be capable of "for some reason I'm getting the feeling you're not taking me very seriously."

"Guys" Derek called to the workers "remove this girl from the property!"

"You're in real-estate business, yes?" she said pushing Derek back onto his feet. She held out her right arm and a long baseball bat had somehow materialised in her right hand "Well here's a couple of aches!" she swung the bat and let it slam into Derek's groin. He yelped in pain and knelt down and fell onto his back holding his crushed crotch.

The rest of the workers at first were spooked by this strange event, but when they had taken all this in they started moving towards this crazed girl with the intent of taking her down, but the girl rather than backing down from Derek's entire work force actually took a few steps closer towards them. She swung the bat this way and that to keep them back, the guys didn't come any closer to avoid the bat but they were only waiting their chance to grab her.

One of the workers came forward and managed to grab hold of the bat before she put too much momentum behind it, but with one great heave she managed to lift that worker off the ground while he held onto the bat she gave one great swing with it and let the bat go. The worker and the bat were launched into the air and landed a good few hundred yards away. Now without the bat she was defenceless and the rest of the workers realised this because they continued to advance on her.

Derek only saw her from the back but as the workers approached her, the girl reached up to her face and looked like she was ripping her mask open. Derek didn't see what was under it but a tearing sound told him that mask had been ripped off. A loud unearthly howl echoed around the forest from the girls head, birds scattered in the trees and other wildlife left their hiding places and ran for their lives. Whatever was under her mask had a terrible effect on the workers, even sight of his workers alone was a terrible sight to watch. All the colour had drained from their faces, some had their mouths hanging open in terror and all of them just stared wide eyed. The girl then gave another monstrous snarl from whatever hideous form lay under that mask of hers and all the workers screamed frozen with fear for a few seconds before turning and running like the wind to get away from her.

Where were they going? She was only one girl, what could she have shown them that was so terrible? Derek heard her laughing like a loony as she watched the terrified workers retreat into the dark forest.

Michael came running as fast as he could from their office trailer having missed what the other workers saw as they ran away into the night as fast as their legs could carry them. Michaels attention turned to Derek as he still lay on the ground clutching his aching balls and the little girl whose ripped mask had someone reformed back into a whole green one again.

"Oh come on, don't tell me you guys and big Derek here were intimidated by a little girl?" Michael felt an impact, a heavy impact as the girl lifted Derek with little to no effort or strain on herself and threw the large man on top of him. Michael fell onto his back and the heavy form of Derek rolled over and missed his head by a few inches.

He tried to get up but the girl was suddenly right up at him and grabbed him threateningly by the collar.

"Leave these trees alone!" as she said this to Michael not only did her red eyes glowed a bright shade of crimson but her teeth somehow became long and pointy.

"What the hell are you?" Michael said, Derek could tell Michael didn't want to say that, it just came out and now the little girl looked even angrier.

"Charming, really charming, you really know how to charm a girl don't you!" she said in sarcasm

Michael in a panic pushed the girl off him, got up and began running for his life joining the other workers in their panic. The girl just grinned broadly and watched him with a mixture of satisfaction and disappointment.

"Ahhhh" the girl said mockingly, balancing herself on the heels of her sandals "no one wants to play with the 'little girl'" she said mimicking Michaels patronising tone a few moments ago.

Derek had got to his feet behind the strange girl and pulled out his revolver from his belt. This girl had to be some sort of demon, no girl could lift him, half the time he couldn't even lift himself and no little girl could scare people like that. He pointed the gun at the girl who was facing away from him looking at a retreating Michael. Derek fired off as many shots as his gun could fire. All his shots were either aimed at her torso to pierce the demons black heart or her head to destroy her brain.

"Die devil, die!" he shouted out as several shots went into that thing. But it didn't even flinch.

She reached up to where the bullets entered her head and froze, her head lolled to one side and it looked like she was going to fall over dead. But the body didn't fall, it remained standing upright and perfectly still, almost creepily still. Its arms dropped and her head then tilted from side to side with a joint grinding crunch. Then the head began to rotate slowly around her neck, her large red eyes rotated to look at him from the side of her face. The next part was the creepiest part of all. Her head continued to rotate but her body didn't follow it! The head did a complete 180 so her head was on back to front compared to her body.

She puckered her lip and spat out several bullets from her mouth all of which disappeared into the dirt. "Ow" she muttered quietly as if she never really felt anything and her crazy looking red eyes rolled upwards and stared directly at him in hostility.

"What kind of devil are you?" he said still pointing the empty revolver at her in his trembling hands.

She didn't reply, instead she rotated her shoulders in the opposite direction her head had just come around so her body and head were facing the correct way again, but she had a massive fold in her neck because her head had technically been twisted all the way around her neck. But as if a massive knot of tension was on her neck it spun her head around the correct way to meet her torso. But her head didn't stop there, her heads rotation instead took the girls torso with it and began spinning her so fast her entire form became a blur of green and red motion. Derek covered his eyes as the spinning demon child kicking up dirt and muck from the floor.

Derek dropped his revolver it was empty and therefore useless. Instead he picked up a large fallen branch, it was heavy so it would do some damage. He raised it over his head and intended to bring it down on the demon. He swung it and it was just about to make contact when. She disappeared!

While rotating extremely fast she had somehow… the only word he could think of was 'drilled' into the soil leaving a sizable hole in the ground. At first he hoped he scared the demon back to hell but his hopes were crushed as the soft soil beneath his feet began to writhe as a small, wide lump appeared in the ground which began to slowly advance towards him, coming closer and closer. He knew exactly 'what' that was and 'it' was coming after him.

He turned and began running from the crazed demon as fast as he could, his boots made the undergrowth crunch loudly as he ran into the woods. He turned back momentarily to risk a look to see if the thing was pursuing him. It wasn't, instead he saw the trailers, the portable toilets, the tools, the machines everything on the site was being sucked under the ground. He didn't care about the site anymore all he wanted was to get out of here.

He continued running deeper and deeper into the dark forest that not long ago he was going to demolish. At least it would give him some cover and he knew a path that would lead him back out of it. He'd come back though with a priest, an exorcist, the Ghostbusters something, he'll not be beaten by a little girl, even a demon girl.

He ran and ran and ran for a long time driven on by the fear of that demon girl but eventually he had to stop, he had a stitch in his side and his groin ached like hell and most of all he couldn't see where he was going it was so dark. He reached into his pocket and produced a small flash light which he flipped on and found a large pair of red eyes staring straight back at him from the darkness. He yelped in surprise and fell back dropping the torch and landing on his back. Another look at the pair of eyes told him it wasn't the demon girl at all.

"Oh, it's just a stupid Owl" he said aloud panting as his heart returned to normal. The owl was perched on the branch of a short tree its wide eyes looked creepily at him.

"I wouldn't be too sure of that" the owl said in a voice which made Dereks' blood run cold. The owls head began to pealed back and to his horror he saw the green demon girls head coming out from its beak!

"Kids don't try this at home" the girl said to no one in particular as she removed her left foot from the owl "trust me owls don't like you crawling down their throats" she added as she removed her right foot from the beak. The owl itself was actually real and as the girl stepped out from its narrow beak it fluttered off spooked itself by this monster.

Standing on the branch with perfect balance the girl reached down with one arm and grabbed Derek by the collar and lifted him up so his entire bulk was off the ground and she did this without a hint of strain. His feet dangled inches from the floor as he was brought up to the girls' eye level.

"No, no please!" he said fear evident in his voice "I had to knock these trees down, it's my job!" she looked down at Dereks bulging stomach before returning her eyes to look at his.

"I thought your job was taste tester at Krusty Burger!" she said. A ripping noise came as Derek's shirt refused to take his weight, it ripped apart and he fell, impacting the ground on his back with a thud. "…and it looks like you've been putting in too much over time!"

She leapt down towards the ground and landed a few feet from where Derek lay, she began to advance menacingly towards him and he who began crawling away from the enraged child.

"Tree's have feelings too" she said, as they left the flash light, the only source of light Derek had in this forest, on the ground. As he retreated the scene around him became much darker as they moved away from the light and as she approached him her angry red eyes began to glow a bright shade of crimson again "they can feel when you cut into them, they scream when they fall..." she reached down the front of her small dress and began pulling something out, it looked like it was a long wooden pole "...nature created everything, even the human race, we should live side by side with nature and respect it…" the pole was long, longer then the length of her dress, "...do you know how it feels…" Derek's eyes widened as the other end of the wooden pole came free, it had the head of a large, sharp axe attached to it "…to get stabbed in the back?"

She swung the axe at him and was laughing like a maniac barely missing Derek by half an inch, he began crawling away much faster and he felt his heart thudding in his chest. This girl was actually going to kill him!

She took another swung at him and missed, then began singing "I've been working on de rail road! All de live long daaaaayyyyyy!" she sang in a voice which left no doubts she was completely insane, she raised the axe for another attack and swung it again and again missed, embedding the sharp blade in the trunk of a tree.

While this creature tried to pull the axe clear of the tree Derek took his chance got to his feet and ran and ran and ran, praying to God, any god, that this foul creature would be struck down. He couldn't see where he was going but he just didn't care anymore.

* * *

Lisa stood there watching the fat man run away with a great sense of satisfaction. She had her left hand on her hip and the other hand on the axe which she hung over her right shoulder. She'd saved the forest, she actually managed to save the forest! She had succeeded where organisations like Green Peace and Friends of the Earth had failed, she saved an entire ecosystem from the corrupted grasp of industry. She knew this mask could be put to some good.

She returned to the site in a matter of seconds with this masks powers and looked around at her handy work. All the workers were gone, all their tools and machines were buried under six feet of Earth. Well they said all things must return to the Earth, why not sooner rather than later? There was no evidence they were even here and more importantly no evidence she was even here either. With no evidence of her existence if anyone even mentioned this night to anyone they would think the workers were insane, after all who would believe an eight year old girl did this?

Her attention suddenly turned to the axe she still had in her hands, where the heck had this come from and how did she know how to get it? She asked herself sizing it up in her fingers.

This mask did give her very strange powers indeed. Incredible speed and agility mixed in with the ability to pull solid objects out of thin air with a massive splodge of shape shifting abilities.

She tossed the axe to the ground, she didn't need it anymore after all she only used it to scare that guy away so he never came back, she wasn't really intending to harm the guy... right? She asked herself. She never answered her own question as she found herself swinging her arms around so she was sent into a spinning tornado again and raced off to see what else she can do.

While she wore this mask she had the power of a god, she could do whatever she wanted and the possibilities raced through her head. Every environmental disaster she could prevent, every starving child she could feed, every helpless animal she could help, every war she could end. The world could be perfect and beautiful again.

When she put the Mask on and her transformation had finished she realised the one factor that was different when she tried to put it on the first time and the time Bart wore the Mask was the time of day. When it transformed Bart it was night, when she tried to put it on the first time it was day, well dusk but it was the same difference. When she put it on again it had just gone past sun down which logically meant the Mask was only active at night. This theory made sense she decided, it was supposed to be the Mask of Loki and Loki was apparently a Norse 'Night' God.

The Mask didn't just transform her physical appearance it also felt like all her social limiting factors had been wiped away. She felt extremely overconfident, mischievous, playful give it the word you want but she didn't feel like the Lisa Simpson she was this morning. The Mask seems to remove those social limiting factors of one's personality and release a side of oneself deeply buried underneath all that emotional baggage and gives what's left the powers to indulge its every desire. She deep down knew this was wrong, that no matter how good her intentions were, she knew what she was doing may have strong moral consequences for her later when she wakes up, but then again... what the hell?

She suddenly stopped rotating and she found herself in a different location. A dark street lit by dim looking street lights. She knew exactly where she was immediately. She was at standing outside the Springfield Zoo. Perfect, exactly where she wanted to go next, she wanted to rescue the poor, cute animals people locked away in confinement and forced to entertain bored kids.

She had seriously considered going straight after that evil and despicable Mr. Burns for his plan to tear down the forest in the first place. But a small part of the real Lisa tugged at her heart strings and made her reconsider. Mr. Burns' delicate –weak more likely- black heart probably wouldn't cope with the shock of what she might put him through. Instead she had settled on helping the animals of the zoo escape.

She went up to the gate and simply stepped through the bars despite them being too narrow to accommodate even her small body and began walking innocently deeper into the zoo all the while whistling the theme tune to 'the Great Escape'.

* * *

**To be Continued...**

* * *

**Authors Notes:** Lisa's Mask is similar to what she's like when she goes completely insane in the TV series, a good example might be in the episode called 'Boy Meets Curl' were Lisa goes crazy collecting winter Olympic pins. The only difference is now she has the powers to act on her insane desires and ideas.

Her more hostile and insane actions are inspired on the original Mask of the Dark Horse Comics which was a much more grittier and violent character then the movie Mask was.

Again, reviews are welcome.


	9. The Curse of the Mask

**Chapter 8**

**The Curse of the Mask**

Bart was sure what he had experienced last night wasn't just his imagination he cleaned every inch of that room and hadn't found his mask, he even started cleaning the feet marks off the walls but questioned why the hell he was actually doing that? It wouldn't help him find it.

Though he failed to find the Mask he did find an old half eaten pop tart under his bed covered in mould, he decided to keep it because he could probably use it in a prank. But apart from that discovery he could not find his mask anywhere but he was sure everything he did that night was real, even more so when Milhouse came to his house a few hours later and asked him about the Mask and why he never let him 'wear it like he promised', when Bart never really made such a promise.

Lisa knew about the Mask from last night when she saw him wearing it and even witnessed his transformation so he decided she must have it and made every attempt to search her room, especially while she was out at the library. He didn't get far in that search though because his Mom found him and stopped him by threatening to cut his allowance. But that didn't really stop him, he waited for Lisa to come home then confront her about the Mask but still he couldn't find it. He spent the rest of the day, or what was left of it because he woke up so late, moping around. He decided to play a prank to cheer himself up, he put the mouldy pop tart in the toaster and waited for Homer to come into the kitchen see 'unattended food' as he called it and start eating it, which he did.

Though that cheered him up a little he still wanted to know where his mask was. It seemed Lisa didn't have it so where the hell had he left the stupid thing?

Though he never found the Mask in Lisa's bedroom nor with Lisa herself but he was still suspicious about his geeky sister because while at dinner she seemed eager to finish before Bart and leave the table to go back up to her room, she tried to disguise this and did it very badly. When she rushed up to her room he had followed and listened at the door waiting for the right moment, why had she been so eager to get back to her bedroom? He had the feeling that if he opened the door suddenly he'd find her with the Mask. He put his ear up against the door but couldn't hear very clearly what she was doing. He gently turned the door handle and pushed lightly to hear what she was saying or doing clearly but something was preventing the door from actually opening. Her door didn't have a lock on it so how come it was locked?

He gave up trying to open the door pretty quickly, though he was still a little suspicious he didn't know for certain Lisa had it. If she had, how did she get it and what if she decided to put it on? He imagined it'd turn her into some sort of super nerd who could bore him to death and suck the life out of him by just talking about animals and the environment.

But if Lisa didn't have the Mask then maybe he dropped it somewhere outside on his way home last night. There was little chance of him finding it but he didn't want to leave it for some dork to get. It was his birthday present and probably the best birthday present he's ever gotten.

He decided to call Milhouse for help and promised that if they could find the Mask 'maybe' he would let Milhouse wear it for a while, for a minute, for a second... maybe. Milhouse had agreed and now they were retracing Bart's steps while he was wearing that mask, starting from Skinners house and moving on from there towards a phone booth where he remembered calling Moes for a second time. After that they moved to where he vaguely remembered doing something to Jimbo Jones but after that it was all a blur.

"It's gotta be around here somewhere" Bart said.

"Bart, its ten o'clock I really need to get home before my parents realise that's not me in my bed" Milhouse said. Bart knew he'd used a couple of pillows in the bed trick to fake himself in bed. It was an old trick but it worked very effectively.

"Why can't I remember what I did last night?" he closed his eyes and tried to think. He'd found out about the 'young Green Face' as the papers had called him, trashing Springfield Elementary and he felt really felt proud of it. But for some reason he just couldn't remember it.

They were now in a dark street and it was getting late but this just increased Bart's hopefulness because with it being so dark when the Mask glowed he'd be able to see it more clearly from a distance.

Bart and Milhouse suddenly felt a great gust kick up from somewhere and quickly died down as if something had gone straight past them really, really fast and nearly pushed them over. They looked at each other and question what had just happened.

"What the heck was that?" Bart asked

"Maybe it's an invention of the resident mad scientist Professor Frink!" Millhouse suggested.

"I'm not a mad scientist!" came the voice of Frink who coincidentally happened to be across the road at exactly the same time. He spoke fast and energetically with awkward hand gestures "I'm an eccentric, unloved geek who gets off on science instead of woman and occasionally has wild fantasies about conquering the world and…" his voice started to lower to the sound of a lonely man "…recreate a race of robot woman who would love only me... ber-hey!" his shoulders slumped and he looked down at the ground for a moment, but perked up when he realised he hadn't answered their question.

"Anyway, to answer your question, no it's not one of my inventions. Though it might be a meteorological effect caused by extreme high press and low pressure in the…" he stopped when he realised both Bart and Milhouse were not only not interested in his explanation but had also disappeared completely, the sound of running footsteps gently faded into silence. "…Oh, they're gone" his shoulders slumped again with a look of loneliness "Oh well, back to my plans for world domination and bionic womanising"

* * *

Bart and Millhouse followed where that gust of wind went but slowed down and stopped when they realised they'd never be able to catch what created it if it went by so fast they never noticed. They continued on the route they were walking, it was a good distraction from their quest but it wasn't exciting enough to distract Bart from why they were out here. He kicked his heels as he walked, he couldn't remember where the Mask was, he'd lost it, he had all that great prank making power and he'd simply lost it.

After a few minutes they stopped outside the Zoo entrance because there was an elephant in the room, literally. An elephant was in the middle of the road with a giraffe, a pride of lions and tigers and bears, oh my!

Standing in the middle of the lot on a small red coloured circus pedestal was a girl… She was giggling like a maniac and she had a crazy look in her eyes like she was insane.

"AAAAHAHAHAHA! Go my friends, fellow herbivores, my great beasts of nature, rejoice for you are all free at long last. HAHA!" she twirled around on her left foot laughing hysterically. She looked like... he wasn't sure, was that... Lisa?

"Lisa?" Bart said in surprise before he could stop himself, just as the words had left his mouth Lisa was suddenly in front of him in the blink of an eye.

"Yes Bartholomew? How might I be of service, oh brother of mine!" she said in a very creepy sounding English accent. Her eyes were wide and she was moving as if she was in a daze or a trance or on drugs or something. It might just have been the light from the street lamps but her face looked like it was darker compared to the rest of her body and both her ears were missing.

"Lisa, what happened to you?" he asked regaining his composure "You're not usually this interesting"

She didn't answer. The way she moved reminded him of how Homer looked when he was drunk. Had she been drinking, under aged? Finally Lisa's done something cool for once.

"Hey Lisa, I like your hair" Milhouse said trying his luck to impress Lisa like always. Bart sighed and rolled his eyes, he supposed every cool prankster needed a comical sidekick to make him look better.

In the blink of an eye Lisa was next to Milhouse. "Hey I like your hair too" she said "but you gotta do something about those glasses" she altered her voice to sound like someone from a girly fashion show "They hide the soul and meaningfulness of the eyes underneath" she gently reached out and took them off his face and saw his eyes which were actually very beady. She yelped in surprise as she slammed them back on "Actually you look better like that!"

Milhouse did have a point though, Lisa's hair was different. Bart only just noticed this, it was a similar shape with the same number of points only the tips were slightly curved backwards away from her face. She also looked like she had a large pair of white false teeth in her mouth, oh gross! Those weren't grandpas false teeth were they?

ROAR! A lion had crept up to Milhouse and was about to snap its jaws down on him, Millhouse yelped in surprise and shock and started hyperventilating. Bart looked on knowing he couldn't possibly do anything to stop this, his best friend was about to die! But Lisa just stepped forward and produced a wooden pole from out of nowhere which she used to prop open the lions mouth so it couldn't close it. Milhouse backed away from the big cat.

"HEY!" she shouted at it "Eating meat is bad. Bad, bad cat!" she said as if someone might say to a disobedient pet "Learn to eat vegetables or it's back in the zoo you go" The lion didn't look like it was really listening to her as the wooden pole simply fell out of its mouth. It turned back to Lisa and flashed its long, sharp, bright teeth and the look on its face showed its annoyance as it changed targets. Lisa had sent herself into a spin which caused her form to be blurred into a mixture of red, yellow and green, with a hint of white starting to sneak into the mix. When she stopped she was in a white coat wearing dorky glasses with a twisted metal looking contraption in one hand.

"You know" she said in an extra geeky voice "Most dentists suggest wearing a retainer for straighter teeth"

She reached out for the lions mouth and her hands moved so quickly they were a blur of motion, but when she had stopped she had wired the lions jaws together. It shook its head as it tried to comprehend what had just happened to it. The lion backed off as it tried in vain to remove the brace from around its mouth first by shaking its head, then by using its paw, but it was fixed to its face.

* * *

"Thanks Lisa" Milhouse said as he regained control of his own breathing.

"Human meat is full of fat and cholesterol" she said removing her white lab coat and glasses which seemed to vanish the instant she removed them "completely unhealthy for a growing lion."

Milhouse didn't know what to say to this as an elephant started thumping around the road towards them.

"Maybe we should get out of here" Milhouse said reaching out for Lisa's hand as the elephant came towards them.

"No" said Lisa almost peevishly snapping her hands away "these are my friends now" she said opening her arms wide and slowly rotated on her left sandal to indicate the whole collection of animals. "HEY!" she screamed at another lion who was about to take a chunk out of a giraffe. She shot over to them both so quickly Milhouse didn't even register it. What was going on? How was she able to do that? It was then Milhouse noticed Bart wasn't with him? Where was he? Had he been eaten by another lion? Did the elephant step on him? Where was he?

"Bart!" he shouted but he found his friend eventually a little ways off, he had been distracted by a strange sight going on. A bear was standing up on its rear legs as a lion, a different one to the one that just had its jaws wired shut slowly circled it waiting to strike.

"Not now Millhouse, we finally get to find out who'd win in a fight between a lion and a bear" he turned back to watch eagerly. The lion drew back and leapt at its prey and the bear was about to bring its massive mass down on the lions head when in a flash Lisa had appeared between them and was pushing them apart "Break it up, break it up you two, no brawling in the street." The bear and the lion both stopped attacking each other at the awkward sight and looked at the much smaller form of Lisa then at each other. Then they looked like they were shrugging at each other and amazingly backed off.

"Lisa, do you have to suck the fun out of everything?" Bart complained annoyed and Lisa turned to regard him.

"You don't need to see it Bart, just think of it logically" she opened her mouth and was sucking in great lungful of air, more air then could actually go into her lungs before saying her next sentence incredibly fast, "The lion may look impressive but though it has muscles it's bones are light in weight and are more brittle, the heavier stronger bear would bring down its weight onto the lions brittle skull and crush it. The lion simply wouldn't have time to get its claws out and rip out the bears' throat." She stopped and breathed in deeply after her quick explanation which to them was just blurred of noise.

"Why are you telling me this instead of letting me see it?" Bart said as he picked up two stones from the floor and threw one at the bear and one at the lion, they both hit them on the head and they looked up and turned to see who threw them. Bart quickly pointed his hands, his right pointing at the bear to his left and his left crossing over his right pointing at the lion to his right indicating that the other had thrown the stone. The bear and the lion quickly turned around and launched themselves at each other again.

Crunch! The bear had indeed beaten the lion.

"Wow, you were right LisaaaAAAA!" he was saying before he found himself being held upside down by the ankles by a length of rope which was handing from a lamppost.

"You're gonna pay for that Bart" Lisa was saying as she pulled on the rope raising him higher and higher "are you so immoral that you would extinguish life just so you can have six seconds of pleasure?" Bart at first didn't speak.

"Yes" Bart said simply clearly just to annoy his sister, Lisa's eyes went unbelievably wide, impossibly wide, and angry and redder. She spoke slowly and strained as if holding back the anger inside her.

"Bad move Bart!" it was Barts turn to become wide eyed as he saw her hair literally burst into flames and the points of her hair became licking points of flame, Bart yelped in shock at this sight and tried to move away but his movements just sent himself into a gentle spin on the rope tying his ankles together. Lisa left his eye sight and was replaced by a pride of tigers coming towards him

"You know" said Lisa "they say in the wild those who do not run from or fight their enemies… is lunch!" she laughed like a maniac as the tigers bared their teeth at Bart and a look of hunger directed at him.

He continued to rotate around the rope until he faced Lisa again.

"Hello is that Fox?" she said into a cell phone, where did she get that from? "Sell all my shares of stock!" she shouted, "I've got an inside tip Bart Simpson is about to die!" What was she talking about? She wasn't seriously going to kill him was she? No, she wouldn't, would she?

He could see her more clearly now thanks to her now flaming hair, the darker skin wasn't skin at all, it looked like rubber, green rubber that wasn't melting with the heat from the flames. It looked like she was wearing a green mask on her face and Bart recognised what that green thing really was immediately.

"Hey, that's my mask!" he shouted at Lisa

"Yeah, you want to make something of it?" she said flashing him a threatening look.

"No, in fact you look better with it on" he couldn't resist, that psychopathic look of hers looked even more funny the more he pushed it and in his true form he did push it "and by the way I farted in that thing before you put it on"

When she heard this she let the rope slide through her fingers a little, threatening to drop him into the tigers claws, but stopped him short before tying it off on another lamppost. That Mask hadn't turned her into a super nerd as he guessed, she was nuts! Lisa then slowly turned to look at her brother with a cruel smug looking smile "That wasn't a smart thing to say Bart, when I'm near a rope dangling you four feet above a pride of tigers hungry for…" she stopped as she looked back at the tigers "EEWWW!" came the unmistakable noise of a girl disgusted.

As Bart rotated around to face the tigers again it was obvious they had 'other' things on their minds. It looked like one was trying to climb over the other, like a strange frog leap but couldn't make it over the top.

Whatever they were doing Bart didn't get a chance to work out because he found himself falling through space as he plummeted back to the ground and landed sharply on his head before rolling onto his back unconscious.

"Don't worry he landed on his head, so it's nothing serious" she laughed hysterically, she turned back to face the natures creatures "Go now! Go my friends, my fellow creatures of nature, run, run and hide back to your natural habitats before they find you again!" But the animals just mingled around, the elephants slowly moved one way, bears moving away in the other direction and tigers just getting on with… what they were doing.

Lisa looked back at Bart who littered the floor unconscious, she then turned to look at Milhouse who was standing there looking at his unconscious friend trying to wake him up then at Lisa, a slight look of fear crossed his face. Lisa consulted a large watch on her wrist which wasn't there a few seconds ago. "Hey it's 11:30pm, do you know where your children are?"

She swung her arms around her so she formed the mini tornado again and like a tornado scooped up both Bart in its winds. Milhouse took a step back because of the strong gust it created and then noticed with alarm that the tornado was coming straight at him. Half screaming Milhouse turned and ran for what he assumed was his life but the twister was too fast for him and he suddenly found himself sucked into the whirling tornado and was spinning around really fast around the centre of the tornado which he still assumed was Lisa. She quickly shot in one direction carrying them both with her, wherever she was going.

* * *

Lisa arrived back home and entered using the back door, she walked past Homer who was watching TV and didn't seem to notice a green headed Lisa dragging an unconscious Bart and Milhouse by the ankles through the room. Milhouse passed out on the way back obviously he couldn't take the spinning, an evident conclusion considering he barfed on the way home. She dragged them both up the stairs making sure Bart's head banged on each step she carried him up. Each time his head made contact with the step he'd quietly yelp a "D'oh" like farther like son.

She took them both to Barts room and without effort she heaved them up and laid them both on Bart's bed. She was about to leave them like that and walk out, but a grin of mischief crossed his face, she turned back and arranged them so it looked like they were hugging and kissing each other. She sniggered at the prank she was playing on her brother before she sneaked out on tip toes making a noise like a cartoon character sneaking around.

The room of her door burst open on its own and she slid into the room on the soles of her sandals before coming to a stop and the door slammed shut of its own accord. "Enough of the masquerade" she said to no one in particular, "time for some beauty sleep."

She reached behind the back of her head and instinctively knew what to do. There was a fold in the green mask around the back of her head under the yellow shark fin like shaped hair strands. Driving her fingers into that fold she began to part the Mask from around her head. She felt a draining sensation as if a plug had been pulled from a bath tub and all the water was draining out, only the feeling was like energy flowing from her toes and emptying out through her head.

She got it off her ears and continued to pull, it came off slowly than expected and the more it detached itself the weaker she felt. The Mask was away from her face and was starting to become much more solid in texture. It was still gripping to portions of her skin and stretching them out as if the thing was desperately trying to cling to life.

Her face peeled off and her face and the Mask snapped back into its proper place and shape. The texture of the Mask had reformed from the light green rubbery type substance back to dark green wood and adopted its original shape, it always seem to have when not being worn. When it had finally come off everything Lisa Simpson was before wearing the Mask rushed back into her head.

She shook her head to clear it and couldn't quite comprehend what had just occurred, it all felt like a dream to her, a dream from the moment she put that mask on to the moment she took it off yet she knew for a fact that was no dream. It was real and more than that, it was a nightmare.

She held the Mask in her hand and turned it over so it faced her, it had gone completely back to the way it was before she put it on her face. It was hard to believe that was the thing on her face while she was prancing around everywhere saving forests and animals, yet she had done much, much more... She had gone too far.

When she first put the Mask on she didn't have as much control over her actions as she would've liked but as she continued to wear it she hoped she'd acclimatises to it and start to control it more, but exactly the opposite happened. The longer she wore it the more and more 'out of it' she seemed to become. All that power she could wield at her finger tips just seemed to drive her more and more out of her mind. She scared off several workers, okay that was just a means to an end but she didn't want to be their 'end' she didn't want to use the power to kill them as she nearly did when she tried to drive an axe into that mans back, then later when she nearly fed Bart to the tigers. That wasn't the worst of it though, what was the worst was she while wearing it she was actually 'satisfied' and happy with her actions. She found it all satisfying? Nearly killing people satisfying? How could she even justify her actions back then, she can't now. All she wanted to do was to stop the destruction of the forest because of an evil rich mad man, she didn't want to kill people.

She looked down into the Mask a bright green light illuminated the inside and she knew instantly it was trying to get her to put it on again. In a panic she threw the piece of wood against the wall and it impacted with a loud bang before falling to the ground apparently unharmed. It was evil she knew it was evil, that thing turned her into everything she thought she was not.

No, she decided, it wasn't the Mask's fault, every time someone seemed to wear it produced a creature that was different. From the news paper article she read about 'Green Face' it turned Homer into a more exaggerated version of himself, with Bart it turned him into a demon who liked to play practical jokes, those were what 'they' deep down wanted from the Mask. She also got what she wanted from the Mask, but not how she expected. The Mask didn't 'give' her that form it plucked it from her own mind.

She took a few steps away from the glowing wooden thing and sat down on the edge of her bed. When someone wears the Mask it seems to remove the social limiting factors of someone's personality, she realised this while she was wearing the Mask. That was the most frightening thing. That 'thing' she turned into wasn't inside the Mask, it was inside her head.

She couldn't take her eyes off that lump of wood as it sat there face down on the floor in the corner of her room just waiting for a new 'host'. She just sat and stared at it, she didn't know for how long but she did. Just looking at it trying to adsorb what she had just realised.

Did Bart or Homer feel the same way after they had removed the Mask? Did that look deep into themselves and decided it wasn't right, did they not like what it turned them into? But as she asked that question she realised the answer was obvious. They both loved what it turned them into, Homer had a bottomless stomach and Bart had the power to do what he liked.

That's when she suddenly remembered something, Bart had recognised her with the Mask on, which meant he knew where it was and was likely to come looking for it. She couldn't possibly let her brother get his hands on such a powerful artefact again she couldn't begin to imagine what havoc he might cause if he wore it again, especially after what she did to him.

She had to destroy it somehow. She got up off her bed and picked up the piece of wood. She held it in her hands and tried to bend the delicate feeling wood in on itself to snap it and break it into pieces. She tried and she strained but it wasn't giving way, she simply wasn't strong enough to do the thing any damage. She threw it on the floor and it landed face up, she stamped on it with her right foot but still it didn't even dent it. It just started glowing again to show it was still active, that slight smile it had made it look like it was laughing at her futile attempts to destroy it. She leapt up and came down on it with both feet attempting to break it but it still held strong and slipped from under her feet causing her to fall onto her back. She felt stupid. Ideally she'd need Homers tools but she didn't want to leave the Mask here on its own and nor did she want to take it with her in case Bart woke up, opened the door and found her with it.

She got up and picked the accursed thing up again and turned it over to look into its eyes, she was stuck with it for a while but she had to make sure Bart never found this Mask again, so she at least needed a good hiding place to keep it. The obvious place would be the attic or the basement but she couldn't risk someone else finding it down there. She could just toss it into the river, but it would eventually turn up somewhere else and someone would find it. Maybe there was someone out there who could wear this thing and not be turned into a monster of some sort, but she doubted such a person existed. Even the stories about it in Edge City told of how destructive the thing was.

She could bury it in the garden but Santa's Little Helper, their dog would undoubtedly dig it up one day. Perhaps she could bury it under concrete, but where on Earth would she find concrete, at a building site obviously but no worker would let her get close enough to a pit of drying concrete. Even throwing it in over a fence would do no good because gym class taught her one thing, that she couldn't throw stuff very far.

She therefore decided the best place would be to hide it in her room, for a while at least until she could find a more permanent prison for it. But where could she hide it in her room where no one else would eventually look? It would have to be a good hiding place because as soon as Bart woke up and worked out what happened he'll start turning this place upside down looking for his lost mask.

There was one place she could hide it she thought, a place where no one would look. She picked up the Mask and placed it on top of her bed. She then moved over to her computer desk which sat in one corner of the room and using as much strength as she could muster she pulled it to one side a little before moving into the opening between it and the wall and pushing it further away so she could get at a roll of loose carpet in the corner of the room. She pulled at the carpet revealing the floor boards below.

She found this place by accident when her dad tried to fit a new carpet into her room, he had made a complete mess of it but she had found this one little place with a loose floor board where she now kept all the things she wanted to hide from the world. Her diary for one as well as other writings expressing the deepest feelings of her soul, no one knew about this place not even Bart so it was the perfect place to hide the Mask.

She wrenched up the loose floor board, picked up the Mask from her bed and placed it in the empty space and moved all the papers and books already in the hiding place on top of the Mask to further hide it. When she was happy she replaced the floor board and made sure it fitted snugly before she replaced the carpet and pushed her computer desk back into its proper place.

She signed for a moment, she was safe now, there was no way Bart would find that mask again in a hurry even if he ripped the walls down he'd never find it. But she knew he'd never believe she didn't have it, he'd no doubt keep pestering her to tell him where it is. She'd have to think of a convincing lie, maybe that the Mask was so dangerous –and indeed it was- she threw it out, tossed it into the river or something, Bart had fallen for much stupider explanations after all.

She now lay in her bed eyes open wide awake staring at the ceiling. She couldn't sleep, she had tried to sleep, but every time she closed her eyes she could see that thing, that monster that lives inside her mind trapped only by the cage that was her humanity, her personality, what truly made Lisa Simpson, Lisa Simpson.

Lisa heard the sounds of screaming followed by a loud thump. Evidently Bart and Milhouse had just woken up in the position she left them in. Lisa couldn't help but snigger at that, it was probably the only enjoyable thing she did while wearing the Mask. Well that and terrifying Bart, but no, she had to feel ashamed about it, that was wrong. She went through her plan in her head again, she'd tell them they were both dreaming. It wasn't foolproof mostly because she'd never believe Bart was stupid enough to fall for it. It didn't seem to matter what she told him though whether she threw it away or tell them it was all a dream Bart would still rip the room apart to look for it.

She looked over at the clock, it was 5:00 am she'd been awake all night and Lisa knew she'd never get to sleep tonight with both the knowledge that the most dangerous thing on the planet was just under her bedroom floor, along with the threat of Bart breaking into her bedroom looking for it, coupled with the fact that the monster she now feared the most in the whole world was there when she closed her eyes.

She heard some commotion from Barts room. The head of her bed was pushed up against a wall her room shared with his so she could hear muffled words but didn't understand them. She rolled onto her side and shut her eyes and tried to drift off to sleep so if Bart did come in she could pretend to be asleep. But that monster appeared again and she couldn't take the memories of what she'd done.

She opened her eyes and they fell on the spot under her computer desk where she knew the Mask of Loki lay. She was scared of Bart finding it again, it was truly terrifying having such power at ones fingertips, but she doubted very much that Bart would agree with her point of view.

A thought suddenly occurred to her, when she tried to put it on the first time it hadn't taken effect. But when she did the second time it did transform her. Something must've changed in those few moments to make the Mask active. Did it need sort of 'priming' for use by a new user? Or maybe it was something to do with the time of day. She remembered when she placed the Mask on her face the first time there was the glare of the sun as it sank down between two houses. The second time when it started taking effect it was getting progressively darker.

She'd read a little about Loki in the library, he was a Norse Night God of Mischief. She didn't really understand what it meant by Night God, but it could indicate that the Mask only ever works at night.

She then got a sense of déjà vu, she knew she had already thought of that while wearing the thing, so how come she forgot? Did she perhaps forget other things she had done while wearing the Mask? Did she hurt anyone? Did she kill someone?

She defiantly couldn't sleep now she was too wide awake thinking about what she might've done under the Mask's influence. Her eyes fell on the computer again. Then a thought occurred to her, had Dr. Neuman replied to her e-mail yet? It would be something to take her mind off the situation.

She crawled out of bed and went up to the computer and turned it on and waited in the semidarkness of her room lit only by the screen of her computer while it booted up. She typed in her username and password and logged onto the internet to view her e-mails and to her delight she had a reply from Dr. Arthur Neuman, she immediately clicked to open it up.

_Dear Lisa Simpson_

_Thank you for taking an interest Norse Mythology specifically the Mask of Loki._

_I write about the Mask of Loki in my new book, 'The Masks we Wear' volume 2 which discusses in more detail the Mask of Loki, however I feel I'll be able to give you some information seeing as the Mask of Loki is not a very well known artefact, in fact most who have studied Norse Mythology tend to ignore it because the Mask is only pure speculation and is probably completely false as there is no mention of it in any other Norse Writings. But I digress, you want to know about the Mask of Loki, but first let me explain who Loki actually is._

_Loki is the Norse Night God of Mischief, a trickster god who supposedly caused so much trouble that Odin banished him from Valhalla, the realm of the gods. According to a vague legend Loki created the ultimate tool of mischief in his own image. He dubbed his creation simply as 'the Mask' also known as the Mask of Loki, he tossed it down to the mortal world to create mischief, chaos and destruction, because whoever wears the Mask would be imbued with the powers of Loki himself._

_Of course it's all just psychological metaphor which I talk about more extensively in my book, Loki is supposed to represent the ID the suppressed part of our subconscious which is pre programmed at birth and deals with all the basic functions and drives such as the drive to survive and reproduce, and is often considered amoral and selfish and driven by the pleasure-pain principle. The Mask supposedly unleashes the wearer's ID by removing social inhibitors which usually guide a person's decisions, creating their unique personality, these inhibitors are built up over the years as one experiences life. But the Mask allows the ID free control of everything. Again I go into greater detail in my book._

That was it! That was exactly it! Lisa thought, that sounds exactly like what happened when you put on that mask, you lose all self control and become unstoppable. It released the wearers ID, it released her ID and gave it the powers to indulge its selfish desires. But it can't have been her pure ID could it? If all it cared about was food, water, procreation and the instinct to avoid pain why did it –she decided to refer to her 'Mask' form in the third person- care about saving forests and releasing animals from prisons? Maybe when it took hold she had some small amount of self control but as time went on the ID started to gain more and more control the longer someone wore it. It made sense considering how she slowly started to lose self control while wearing the Mask and why her memories of this night started to become fuzzy and blurred in the latter half of the time she spent as her alter ego.

There was more to the email and Lisa read on to see if he mentioned anything else.

_Of course the Mask legend only came about four years ago by a colleague of mine -forgive me if I do not divulge his name- his findings were ridiculed because he had no source material. Though as a friend I allowed his research into the museum as a purely speculative myth and anyway it was the perfect metaphor for my book. _

_Though I do sort of believe his findings might have some basis in reality but only for one reason. A few years previously a mentally disturbed man came into my office with a mask of the same design that would later be proposed by my colleague. I had identified it as being a representation of Loki. The man then suspected Loki had been banished from Valhalla into the mask he brought in because he claimed when he put it on he became an unstoppable creature of mischief and didn't act like himself. He was obviously suffering from a mild delusion or nightmare probably from reading volume one of my book._

So the Mask really had been used previously. Considering the Edge City Times article told of a man called '_the Mask_' she was beginning to wonder if this 'disturbed man' Neuman talked about was really _the Mask_ mentioned in that article_._

_When my colleague suggested 'the Mask of Loki' myth and the design of it I remembered the strange man who brought in a similar looking mask. Obviously that man had read about it somewhere as it predated my colleagues findings giving me enough evidence to suspect what my colleague had written wasn't a pure fiction._

_Which is why there is very little information relating to the Mask of Loki, officially it doesn't exist until proof in the form of Norse writings surfaces._

_I hope I have been of help and I strongly encourage you to buy my book if you wish to learn more about the parallels between mythology and the human mental state._

_Regards_

_Dr. Arthur Neuman, PhD_

_University of Edge City_

So there was only one mask like this in the world, that was a relief at least. It had also been worn before and probably many times by different people. What twisted creatures had it turned them into she wondered? Did any of them have even the slightest bit of control over what they did?

She then remembered some of the thoughts from the previous day. The Big Green Headed Beaver specifically, it was suspected as a new animal which could do things ordinary beavers couldn't. It must've been a beaver wearing the Mask that managed to create the giant beaver dam blocking the lake next to the nuclear plant. That's probably where the Mask lay for years since the dam was built, until Burns destroyed it and released the Mask.

Where had Homer bought this mask? Did he even buy it or did he just find it floating in the river? She'd have to ask Homer this when he got up, since school was closed until they could fix the damage Barts 'Mask' had caused she had plenty of time to investigate this mystery.

She looked down at the floor, though she couldn't see it, for some reason she had the feeling the Mask could still see her and more than that, she had the uneasy feeling it was angry with her for locking it away.

* * *

To Be Continued...

* * *

**Authors Notes:** The information I gave on the ID actually came from Wikipedia, so thanks to Wikipedia if it's correct. If it's wrong, then its Wikipedia's fault! :D

I deliberately left what the tigers were up to vague yet hinted. If you didn't get the joke go ask your parents to explain it, its not my place to explain these things to you. Lol

That's also my explanation for why Neuman didn't recognise what the Mask was in 'the Mask' yet knew all about it in 'Son of the Mask' I might delve into that back story about his 'colleague' in another Mask story ;)


	10. Me and my ID

**Authors notes: **I just want to remind the readers that any opinions expressed by the characters in this story do not in any way reflect my own and are entirely in character of said characters -even those affected by the Mask-

-Enjoy

* * *

**Chapter 9**

**Me and my ID**

Oh his head! What happened? Where was he? Why does his head hurt so much? He remembered something to do with lions and tigers and bears and elephants and... he reached up and felt his head were a large lump was beginning to rise up. A jolt of pain sparked where he touched it and a rush of pain spread over the top of his head. What happened to him last night?

He replaced his arm back where he raised it from over something on the other side of his bed. Both his arms were around something, was he hugging his own pillow? No, he had his head on his pillow and whatever he was hugging it was far too solid. It felt like a bag full of meat. He opened his eyes and could do nothing but stare for a moment, what he had his arms around was Milhouse! Milhouse's eyes also slowly opened behind his thick glasses and they looked in horror at each other for a few moments taking in the awkwardness of their situation before they both screamed and pushed away at each other so quickly that they both fell out of opposite sides of Bart's bed and landed on the floor with a thud.

They both continued on their backs on all fours to move away from each other until they were as far apart as possible, pressing themselves up against opposite walls of Barts room. They stood there for a moment catching their breath. Barts heart thudded in his chest at the scare he just had, and by the look of it Milhouse felt the same way. They just stared at each other for a moment still in shock. It wasn't until Bart caught his breath and his heart started to beat more slowly that he had the courage to ask.

"We... we didn't! Did we?" Bart asked slowly in disgust

"Do what?" Milhouse asked equally horrified

"You know..." Bart said pressing his back further into the wall as if he could pass through it and disappear from this odd situation "Kiss?"

Dudes didn't kiss, he knew that as a number one rule, only girls kissed, dudes didn't... it just wasn't done.

"Can you taste lemon flavoured cough syrup?" Milhouse asked, Bart waggled his tongue in his mouth hoping to god that he couldn't taste anything but his own spit.

"No" he replied and Milhouses face relaxed and Bart took this to mean they didn't kiss during the night. He also breathed a sigh of relief. How did they end up like that, in the same bed? He strained his brain as much as he could to remember what had happened last night. But his brain didn't seem to like this and instead of giving him memories decided to give him a slight head ache telling him to 'knock it off!' But there was one thing Bart knew, he couldn't remember how they got home that night.

"Hey, how did we get home?" Bart asked looking around, they were really his room they were both in it and they were in his bed where they... he'd rather not go there actually. How did they get back to his house? They were supposed to be looking for his Mask. That thought triggered another, then another, then another, then something funny which wasn't really important before his trail of thought went back on track. All the memories of the previous night flooded into his head.

"Lisa" Bart said quietly in realisation to himself, she'd tried to kill him, she tried to feed him to the lions... tigers... whatever! That was the last memory he had before everything blacked out, but she can't have fed her to the lions or he wouldn't be alive. Or was he? This wasn't hell was it? If it was then it was a lot lamer then he expected. He expected flames and bottomless pits and things like that, this was just his room. Or was this heaven? Why did he wake up nearly kissing Milhouse? If this was heaven then god had just played a prank on them, at last the creator did something cool.

He was certain what happened last night wasn't a dream though, because he had plenty of scrapes and bruises on him from whatever happened.

"Lisa must've taken us back to your place" Milhouse said at last, this meant they were both alive and god hadn't pulled that cool prank, she did. Lisa, pulled a prank? That wasn't like her at all to be cool, it was a cool prank by his standards and he almost felt proud, but then he remembered why she'd done it. She had his Mask, she had been wearing his Mask which meant she stole his Mask, she really did have it all along and she kept it from him.

"Lisa's got my Mask" Bart said to Milhouse

"Lisa found the Mask?" his sidekick said, hope rising in his voice that he'll get a chance to wear it.

"No, Lisa stole it" Bart said annoyance clear in his voice "she must've snuck in here yesterday and stole it while I was asleep." He checked his Krusty clock, it was five am –am meaning morning he remembered from what he had learned the previous day- "Then she wore it herself because she was jealous I've got such a cool mask"

He turned and marched over to his door and took the door handle in his hands but stopped himself short from actually opening it. Something popped into his head what did you call it?... a thought! If he went into Lisa's room now and started rummaging around, Lisa would go to mom, and mom would speak to Homer, and Homer would do nothing passing the burden of punishment back to mom who would send him back to bed and probably punish him.

What could he do? He wanted that Mask back but he didn't want mom or dad to find out about it either. Knowing Lisa as soon as he goes into her room she'd go tell mom all about it. Of course mom probably won't believe her but all you needed to do was put the Mask on and that was all the proof you needed. It wasn't his forte but he actually had to sit and think of this very, very carefully. He needed to plan what he was going to do, then suddenly he had a brilliant and sneaky idea. All he had to do was wait until Lisa got up and left her room, then he'd tear her place apart to find it.

* * *

She was tired, tired then she had ever felt in her life, her body felt like a ran down toy sluggish and none responsive, yet despite this tiredness she couldn't get to sleep at all, not one wink that night. While wearing the Mask she felt powerful and energetic but once she removed it her natural fatigue seemed to catch up with her rapidly, and now the Mask stopped her sleeping because it had given her the knowledge of what was inside her head, the monster that it released from the depths of her mind.

She wanted to sleep, willed her to sleep, she closed her eyes and said to herself, sleep, please sleep, just go to sleep. But she just couldn't. Had that Mask given her insomnia as well? She couldn't see her 'other' self when she closed her eyes anymore at least so that was a good sign.

She opened her eyes, it was much lighter now and sun light shone in through her curtains. From outside she could hear the chirping of birds welcoming the sun into the sky, and keeping her awake still. She couldn't stand laying in her bed trying to get to sleep no longer, she had to do something else.

She got up out of bed and went up to her mirror and rubbed the sleep from her eyes, when she opened them and looked at her reflection she jumped at what she saw. What was staring back at her was her green headed, red eyed alter ego grinning a large toothy cartoonish grin at her, she only saw it for a second but she blinked and rubbed her eyes before looking again, it was gone, it was a hallucination. Her face was really normal, normal in every sense of the word except for the dark circles visible under her eyes, her hair was a mess her usually evenly spaced points were all out of alignment. She breathed a sigh of relief. It might not be the prettiest her reflection had been but at least it was 'her' reflection.

She looked back at where the space under her computer was, where the Mask now resided, was it still there? She shook her head of course it was still there, there was no way someone could take it while she was in here, she'd have heard since she never got a wink of sleep.

She was reminded of Schrödinger's Cat problem, the idea that if you put a cat in a solid sound proofed box and sealed it, the only way you could tell for sure that the cat was alive or dead was to open it up and see. It was a problem in quantum physics but why was she thinking of it now?

She looked at the clock, 8:00am, it had been 5:00am when she last looked which meant 3 hours had passed, but it felt like three days. She decided it was time to get up anyway there was no point trying to get to sleep anymore and she needed something to drink and eat, maybe that would wake her up at least or even help her fall asleep.

She opened the door and walked straight past Barts room. She didn't care if he went into her room to look for the Mask, she was too tired to care right now and she was confident he'd never find it anyway. But thankfully he didn't open his door as she walked past.

She slowly went down the stairs and went into the kitchen where her mom was already up, rushing around the kitchen preparing breakfast and drinks for the rest of them. Maggie was in her high chair sucking peacefully on her pacifier. Oh, how blissfully ignorant she was of the darkest shadows and creatures which must resided inside her own head, inside everyone's heads. The youngest member of the family was just content with sucking on her pacifier while Lisa had to live with this nightmare trapped in her brain. For that split second she would've given almost anything to swap places with her younger sister so she would be in blissful ignorance of her ID, the small part of her the Mask used to create the creature she turned into when she put it on, a secret identity she didn't even know about that was plucked from her brain. Her brain, probably the one thing she could've called a proper friend and even it had really dark secrets she didn't like.

Thud! Went the ceiling followed by a "D'oh!" The unmistakable call of the wild Homer awakening from his slumber by falling out of bed onto the hard floor, surprisingly it was a very effective alarm clock, and he always fell out of bed right on time, usually a few minutes past 8:00am. If that carpet in her mom and dad's room were made of shag pile she doubted if Homer would wake up at all.

Her eyes were slowly closing again as her mind tried yet again to dose off unsuccessfully. Probably for the best, she couldn't really analyse anything else going on in the kitchen due to her own fatigue.

"Lisa, are you alright?" her mom asked her as she sat down at the table

"I'm fine, I just didn't sleep well last night" she yawned as she reached out for her cereal and the milk.

"Lisa did you sleep in your dress?" her mom asked "It's all creased" her mom was right she had slept in her clothes. It just never occurred to her to change her clothes because her mind was full of disturbing thoughts. She didn't answer her moms question as she started to pour her cereal, adding milk and poured herself some orange juice.

She then picked up her juice to take a sip, but her drink caught her attention immediately when her lips felt something floating around in her juice and her tongue tasted an awkward milky taste. Her eyes opened more and she felt a little more alert and awake at her awkward tasting drink. But then she realised a very stupid mistake she'd done, she'd poured her cereal into her glass and her juice into her bowl. She was much too tired to feel stupid about this mistake or to switch the contents around so she just drank her cereal and ate her juice, no wait that wasn't right... oh screw it! Her brain was stalling for a moment like it was running on fumes.

When she was finished she put her things down and her head slowly lowered onto the table as she tried to sleep again.

"Lisa maybe you should lay down on the couch for a few hours" het mom's concerned voice drifted into her consciousness. "The table isn't the best place to sleep"

Lisa agreed but didn't say anything as she got up slowly walked into the TV room, she felt like a zombie in her sleep deprived state, any thoughts which tried to jump into her mind couldn't scale the walls that were her own fatigue. She climbed onto the couch and laid down on the soft padding, laying her head down on the chairs arm and for some reason all thoughts of the Mask were out of her mind as she began to gently drift off to sleep.

She had a few moments of blissful silence, the only noise she could hear was the gentle rattle of... stuff her mom was doing in the kitchen and the sound of her own regular breathing. A few moments after that the kitchen noises had drifted out of her consciousness and her mind was at peace.

Suddenly she felt something landed on her and her eyes snapped open, she could've breath as whatever was on top of her back started crushing her. The pressure was released but only for a second as it returned just as quickly knocking the wind out of her again. She rotated her head to see what was causing this. It was Bart sitting down on top of her and bouncing up and down.

"Bart! Get off me!" she screamed at him as she tried to roll over to push him off. He jumped off eventually and landed on the floor where he turned to look at her, a cruel smile on his face from what he had just done, but Lisa also registered a look of annoyance in his eyes as well.

"Lisa, where's my Mask?" he asked

"What?" she asked as her tired brain tried to catch up with her.

"What have you done with my Mask? Where is it?" he asked again "I know you had it, I saw you wearing it last night!" She rubbed her eyes, okay here we go, she was going to use her excuse. She got up off the couch and was going to play dumb and say he must've been dreaming, but that wasn't what came out of her mouth.

"It's there!" she said as she pointed down at Barts shirt, he curiously looked down and amazing even herself Lisa used her pointing index finger to flick Barts nose up so quickly she heard an audible crack. Now Bart knew what it felt like to fall for a childish prank. Her brother, the devil incarnate took a few steps back holding his nose which had heavily began to bleed.

"Lisa, I didn't know you had it in you" he said almost proudly as he held his bleeding nose. He can't be in that much pain then she decided. "But that doesn't mean I don't want my mask back!" he added. She suddenly felt wide away and her eyes were wide open as she quickly stepped next to him.

"What's wrong, Bart? Underwear too tight?" she said and before the spiky haired boy could answer she stepped behind him reached down the back of his shorts and pulled his underwear over his head to cover his eyes like he'd done to her two nights ago. "Well it is now!" her voice adopted a high pitched squeaky tone as she laughed like a lunatic as she stepped back to watch Bart struggled to remove his underwear from his head.

"Lisa what's gotten into you?" Bart said he finally managed to remove his underwear from his head.

"What do you mean 'gotten into me?'" she said as she somehow found a baseball bat from somewhere on her person "It's been in my head this whole time!" she felt her eyes become crossed and each eye ball then began rolling in the opposite directions to each other as she swung the bat behind her back and knew exactly what she was going to do, she didn't want to do it but her internal struggle was overpowered by the urge to simply do it.

She swung the bat down and to slammed onto Barts head so sharply she heard his head crack. He fell down forwards blood oozing from his nose and ears, he was probably dead she thought.

"And that's game match and set!" she grinned sharply, what has she done? She's killed Bart? Okay he annoyed her sometimes and she sometimes wished he'd just drop down dead, but she assumed that would just happen from drink driving or a drug over dose in his late teens, not as the result of something she wanted to do!

She dropped the bat and took a step back putting her hands over her mouth to stop herself from screaming at Bart's lifeless body, tears started to well up in her eyes at the implications of what this could mean, she was a murderer plain and simple.

She was distracted briefly by movement from the side of her vision. Had someone seen her kill her brother? She turned to look at the window above the TV, but there was no one there. The movement was coming from the TV screen itself. But the TV was off so where did the movement come from? She regard the TV, the blank screen acted like an effective mirror and what she saw made a chill run up her spine.

In it she saw her own reflection, it was completely normal except her eyes were glowing a bright shade of crimson and as she grinned her mouth was filled with a set of large, tile white teeth. She felt an even colder chill run up her back as she saw her reflection do something she was sure her body itself wasn't performing. The 'mirror Lisa' reached up to grab her hair above her forehead and pulled and her entire face started to peel away and came off like it was a yellow rubber mask, underneath it revealed the crazy looking green face of her alter ego underneath. It laughed, it was laughing at her, laughing like a loon. Lisa, the real Lisa screamed and...

Everything vanished when her eyes snapped open and she sat bolt upright still screaming. She stopped when she realised she was on the couch again and Bart's dead body was nowhere to be seen. She reached up and felt her face, it was normal as far as she could tell but to make absolutely sure she got off the couch and crawled along on all fours to the TV to look at her reflection in it. She reached up with her right hand and felt her face and her mirror image mimicked the movement in reverse. She gave a deep sigh of relief it was just a dream, a stupid nightmare.

Or was it? _Of course it was!_ Her brain told her. The ID was supposed to be part of her subconscious after all, after all that freedom it had was it any surprise that it would take control the only way it could, through her dreams. This reminded her of that movie, Nightmare on Elm street where the monster Freddie Kruger could leap from dream to dream and harm or kill whoever's dream he entered. This didn't mean that what she did in her dream affected Bart, did it?

_Oh stop being so paranoid!_ Her brain yelled at her, _and stop trying to give your ID an identity, it's just a small part of your mind, a collection of brain cells connected by synapses. Think about it rationally and logically, not emotionally. The Mask gives you these powers only when you wear it, you're not wearing it, therefore you cannot cause harm to someone in your dream. It's probably just your ID excited by the Mask that's all!_

She breathed another sigh of relief, at least she knew her logical brain was still on her side at least. It was just a dream, nothing more, nothing more, nothing more. But no matter how many times she told herself this she wasn't completely convinced it was true.

* * *

Saturday night, a green headed man attacks two policemen and a couple of old ladies. Sunday night, a green headed boy attacks the principle of Springfield elementary school before vandalising the school itself. Now Monday night, a green headed girl younger than ten attacks the workers of a logging company before releasing the animals at a nearby zoo. There was some connection here that police chief Wiggum just wasn't seeing.

All three wore a green rubber mask and all apparently displayed the same magical abilities. They could all be the same person he decided. When Wiggum met the adult version of this crazed lunatic he was on patrol three nights ago and watched as this person transform his physical appearance many times, so it was reasonable to assume all three of these people were one, 'Green Face'.

They tried to talk to the manager of the logging site which was attacked last night to get a record of these bizarre series of events, but Derek was in no state to talk suffering from 'post traumatic stress disorder' as the doctors put it.

Wiggum arrived early that morning at the site where this girl 'Green Face' caused havoc, but declared there was no case due to lack of evidence because not only was there no evidence of Green Face being there but there was also no evidence of a logging company having been there either. No heavy machinery, no portable officers or toilets, nothing, zip! Just a mass of upturned earth which workers claimed covered the remains of their site.

Wiggum had seen Green Face take bullets in the head, seen him... her... 'it' pull solid objects from nowhere, but even Wiggum couldn't believe Green Face had upturned the soil and buried everything under the dirt in one night. Now though he had reports that heavy machinery was being dug up from the ground and more than that. Mr. Burns the financial backing for the company had filed a complaint that a bulldozer had somehow fallen out of the sky and crashed into the side of his mansion, the same bulldozer which was reportedly fired into the air by Green Face from a tree.

Wiggum now sat and looked at the board on the wall which had three pictures of Green Face in 'its' three forms. Lines and notes had been made on the board linking Green Face to certain subjects and victims. He gazed down at his book, 'Investigating Crimes for Dummies' he'd done everything the book told him to. Try to link everything together to get a general pattern, the only thing missing was the motive.

He put down Investigating Crimes for Dummies and picked up a dictionary to look up the word motive. '_the goal or object of a person's actions: _Her motive was revenge.' okay in other words why did they do this? Why couldn't people just say that? Why invent a whole new word so they could condense a few words into one? Why not just write it out? People who did that were just so lazy by his book

"Hey Lou, get me a cuppa coffee will ya?" he called to his partner, he'd been wracking his brain for ten minutes and he needed a break.

"But Chief, the coffee machine is next to your desk" said Lou who was standing by the board mulling the crime over himself.

"But I'm the Chief" Wiggum insisted "so I'm in charge"

Lou reluctantly went over to the coffee machine and mixed Wiggum a coffee, black with four sugars just how he liked it.

"Hey chief, I've been thinking about this Green Face" Lou said as he set the styrofoam cup filled with hot steaming coffee onto his desk. "What if it's not the same guy?" Wiggum took a slight sip of his hot coffee and regretted it as the hot coffee burnt his tongue. He jerked back slightly, removed the cup from his mouth and stuck his tongue out. As he spoke he blew on his own tongue to cool it down.

"What are you talking about Lou?" he asked in annoyance of his own actions as he set the warm cup down again.

"Well, how can it be the same guy? The attacks are random and seem to change depending on what form he's in" Lou went up to the board and pointed his hand at the adult Green Face. "This Green Face humiliates us after we tried to kill him then attacks a couple of harmless women in their apartment..."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!" Wiggum interrupted as if he had just realised something incredibly important "Those were women? I thought they were cross dressing" Lou continued despite Wiggums interruption and went up to the pictures of the kid Green Faces'.

"The younger male Green Face attacked anyone to do with Springfield Elementary, the principle, the bullies even the school itself, which means he's a rebel who hates school and education. But the young female Green Face actions lean towards someone who is concerned about the environment, which means she must be well educated for her age."

"I'm not following you" Wiggum said confusion clear on his face

"Unless this guy is a three way schizophrenic, I don't think Green Face is one person but three different people all with different motives." Lou explained.

"If you're right Lou, do you have any idea how we catch these three lunatics?" Wiggum asked peevishly, Lou had been getting smart with him all week. First it started with him using 'his' radio that only 'he' the chief of police should be able to use. Then contradicted him several times about whether a man was dead or alive, then complained when he ate a pie that Lou had declared was evidence and now was he was trying to take the lead in 'his' investigation. Lou just shrugged however and Wiggum's face upturned in a triumphant smile. Suddenly Wiggum snapped his fingers, had an idea. He rolled his office chair across the room over to a computer and started the internet explorer.

"What are you doing chief?" Lou asked as he joined Wiggum at the desk.

"Something simple Lou, something so simple it's brilliant!" Wiggum began typing "I'm going to google 'who did it'"

"Cheif, that won't work" Lou said but Wiggum didn't listen "We need to find more clues!"

"Well, then I'll google 'more clues' then!" Wiggum said peevishly changing his search topic "Ah Ha!" he shouted in triumph "I know who he is now!"

"Who?" Lou asked curious to know if Wiggums brilliant plan had actually worked.

"It was Coronal Mustard in the library with the lead pipe!" Wiggum said in triumph.

"Cheif" Lou said in a voice Wiggum knew he was about to point out a flaw in his brilliant plan "That's the website for a game called Cludo"

* * *

Lisa was asleep again on the couch and for the rest of her nap Lisa didn't dream, which was a relief she couldn't handle her ID repeatedly trying to take control in her sleep. Sitting up all night worrying about what was trapped inside her head was bad enough without it coming out to haunt her in her sleep.

When she awoke it was to the sound of lunch being prepared by her mom, she'd slept solidly for three hours and hadn't dreamed about her ID trying to gain control again, in fact she didn't really dream about anything in particular but she didn't care about not dreaming about anything, she was just glad she got at least three hours of sleep. She sat up, got up off the sofa and went into the kitchen for something to eat.

If she thought Bart was not going to question her about, or try to find the Mask she was dead wrong. As she climbed the stairs back to her room and went in she found the place a wreck. All the draws of her dresser were opened their contents thrown everywhere, her books had been pulled off the shelf and her backpack had been tipped upside down sprawling all the books onto the floor as well into a heap. He'd even gone as far as to rip the heads of her Malibu Stacy dolls. However the heads were only held on by a small plug and can easily be reattached. But, what really got her goat was what he'd done to her saxophone.

It lay on its stand next to her desk, but the rim was covered in a transparent liquid. The inside was covered in a mucus substance and it took her a while to work out what it was. Bart had been hawking back and spitting into it gradually filling it. It made her stomach turn at the thought of what Bart did. She accidentally knocked her saxophone causing it to fall over, some of the mucus substance to spill out onto her carpet. That sickening feeling was rapidly being replaced by a feeling of deep anger. She suddenly felt eight years of anger begin to resurface and started pushing at the boundaries of her head, anger which desperately wanted to be used, to be directed at Bart.

She moved towards her computer her anger at boiling point, she'd make Bart pay for what he's done. But she stopped half way there for two reasons. One, the reason she was moving towards the computer was she wanted to retrieve the Mask and use it to get back at Bart. The second was because she could see the door to her closet was ajar, and through it she could just sort of sense who was in there, she didn't know how but she had never been more certain about something like this before in her life.

She quickly and without warning ran at the closet door and pushed on it to close it, there followed a crash and a yelp of pain as whatever was in there fell on top of the person hiding inside.

She threw open the door again and several objects fell from the open door but sitting in the middle of the pile was Bart with several things over his head.

"Bart Get out!" she felt all that anger return in full force and she struggled to keep it down, but she was managing it, just.

"Not until you give me my Mask back!" he insisted as he got up and pushed the door a side to step back into her room. "I know you have it, and I still remember what you did to me last night. You are so dead!" Bart looked at her menacingly as if he was going to attack her.

If he was expecting her to be intimidated then he was dead wrong. Lisa's anger just went into overdrive as she reached out for his shirt and pulled him closer so she could stare directly into his eyes, the menacing look he had as replaced by one of surprise. Lisa clenched her teeth and her eyes radiated the utter hatred she had for her brother, she then spoke slowly and menacingly through gritted teeth.

"Listen very carefully to me 'Bart Simpson'" she spoke his name as of it was the name of some despicable demon who needed to be locked up, and as far as she was concerned he was. "If you step one foot over the threshold of my door and touch any of my stuff again..." she reached down and picked up a very thick book entitled 'the complete works of Shakespeare' "...I'll shove this book so far down your gullet you'll be crapping Hamlet for a week!"

The look on Barts face changed from mild surprise to horror as he tried to step back away from her. She let go of his shirt and allowed him to pull away and she continued to fix Bart that menacing look and simply said the words "Get out" flatly.

"Not until you give me my Mask!" Bart insisted. At these words Lisa's blood boiled again and she reached out and grabbed Bart by the shirt again so keep him in her arms reach. She held up the book so it was level with his mouth "Open wide, here comes the choo choo train!"

In that instant Bart yelled, pulled away, ducked under her arm and ran out of her room slamming the door behind him in case Lisa tried to follow. Yeah, he'd better run, if she gets her hands on him again she'd... she'd... she'd... What was she doing? What was she even thinking? This wasn't some idle threat she was making she was actually considering shoving that book down his gullet. What was she thinking? That book came from the library they'd kill her if anything happened to it.

She shook her head, was she dreaming again? She must be. She dropped the book on the floor and pinched her left arm and a spike of pain registered in her brain, which meant she wasn't asleep this time so what on earth happened? What was going on? She wasn't wearing the Mask, was she? She went over to her mirror and checked her appearance, it was exactly the same as it had always been, so why did she suddenly behave like that? As if her ID had briefly taken control and was trying to break free again once again. But how could it do that, it wasn't supposed to have any form of sentience at all.

She turned to look back at the spot where the Mask lay in hiding. Could it still be affecting her somehow? Did her ID have so much control that simply removing the Mask doesn't make it go completely away? Was this a permanent change? Or was it just temporary? She preformed the latter, she didn't want to think that there was a monster actually inside her waiting to come out whenever she got angry. She may only be eight but she could still cause harm to someone if she loses it again.

She took a chair and jammed it under the door knob of her door again to stop anyone coming in especially Bart, before turning back to view the demolition site that was her room. She didn't feel like cleaning this mess up and the more she looked at it the more her blood boiled but she need to control herself. She closed her eyes and sighed. It was then she realised her eye lids were actually still very heavy.

She dropped forwards onto her bed and decided to rest a little more, maybe she was still just a little sleep deprived, maybe that was it, she was just cranky she thought but part of her mind wasn't fooled by this excuse at all. If the Mask had done this to her then Loki really had a sick sense of humour.

Lisa suddenly realised something. Loki was a 'Norse' Night God, if that mask really was the Mask of Loki then didn't that mean that Loki was real and so where the Norse pantheon of Gods, that also meant the Norse religion was the correct one making all other religions, Christianity, Muslims, Buddhism, Hinduism all just false religions. She believed in god sure but she also believed there was more than one way to reach him... or her... she usually saw most religions as gateways to god, but those who lead those religions were just people using them to milk their followers of money or get them to do something, which is why she converted from Christianity to Buddhism.

_Who__ever heard of a Buddhist extremist? If you annoy them they have no choice but to wish you good karma_... Did she actually think that line or was that her ID trying to speak again?

The point she was she trying to make was if the Mask was made by Loki then did it make the Norse God Pantheon and possibly all the gods under it real as well? She didn't know whether to believe that or not, she had been born a sceptic it was in her blood to question if things were right or wrong. Another explanation is that this mask was made by some sorcerer or witch and dubbed it the Mask of Loki because of its similarities to Loki. Dr. Neuman did say there were no records of the Mask of Loki existing in Norse legend, so who was to say it wasn't made and named so because of those similarities.

The Mask had to make her accept one thing though. The world wasn't as neat and ordered as she liked to think. She was always sceptical of anything which could be approximated to magic, always believing there was some scientific explanation behind it all and yet here was a mask which seemed to blow that mode of thinking out of the water. Was it really magic? Arthur C. Clark had said that any form of technology advanced enough or any unexplainable phenomenon might be considered by those with no understanding of it as magic. Actually the quote was 'any alien technology advanced enough would be indistinguishable from magic' but she wasn't prepared to believe the Mask was made by a bunch of little green aliens.

Some would consider this form of thinking narrow minded but she just couldn't accept magic was real, even though there was clear evidence just under her floor boards. Her lips curled up into a smile, on the other hand if magic was real she could probably turn Bart into a frog. She would probably do it as well, all she had to do was put the Mask back on when the sun went down and she could get pay back on Bart for what he did to her room.

No! What... What was she thinking? Putting the Mask on again was the last thing she wanted to do, why would she even consider it? The Mask must've done something to her to make her think these things and she was sure that little part of her which the Mask brought out was desperate to be free again, it was bubbling up to the surface which made her worried because what if she got to the point where she couldn't help herself?

She closed her eyes tight and tried to blot all this from her mind. She would make sure she never put the Mask on again she'd make sure no one ever wore the mask again because when she had her chance she would go down to the garage, get some of her dads tools and destroy the Mask completely.

* * *

**Authors notes:** For those who are wondering, Bart and Homer's ID's won't bubble up to the surface because their ID's are extensions of themselves so they accept them. Lisa is the only one so far who is fighting against her own ID, refusing to accept the creature she turns into.

Again I'd like to add that the opinions expressed by the characters do not reflect my own.


	11. Back to School

**Authors notes**: There is a gag in this chapter where ~ means Homer changes channels on the TV, you'll see what I mean when you read it ;)

* * *

**Chapter 10**

**Back to School**

Footsteps echoed around the large hall, they became louder and louder as the guard came closer and closer and as he passed they slowly became more and more distant and more quiet. Robert Terwilliger hated prison, the food was horrible, the accommodation was horrible, the service was horrible, everything was horrible about prison. The only place where you could get worse accommodation was a London apartment.

Springfield prison wasn't so bad through, the food was free, the water was free and in a way he was getting revenge on the country and its people by just staying in prison since it cost the tax payers their hard earned money to keep him alive in here like a caged animal. He chuckled under his breath as he lay on his bed, his large puffed out hair acting like an effective pillow since his real pillow was so hard you could bludgeon someone to death with it.

It was four in the morning and the rest of the prison ward was asleep, except Snake who was still fussing over getting revenge on this new maniac in town called Green Face. There was also a skinny hillbilly who still lay awake pining for his 'true love' which turned out to be the reason he was in here, for doing obscene things to a pig, lord knew what he did to it to end up in here and he'd rather not think of the possibilities. Also Fat Tony, local mafia gangster was also awake plotting revenge on someone who ratted him out during an 'exchange' and was planning to have said rat murdered with concrete shoes in a river. Cliché he admitted but effective, if only he could get rid of his enemies as easily while on the inside.

Robert listened for the guard coming close to his cell doors again, and waited in the semi-darkness as the echoing footsteps came and walked past and continued onwards around the cell block again. When he was satisfied no one else was coming he reached under his pillow and produced a black book with the Christian cross on it, a holy bible. He placed one hand on it and almost stroked it. When he was 100 percent certain no one else was coming he opened the book on a particular page, revelations. Quite a quaint page in retrospect because between the pages were two photographs, two photos of people who remind him why he was in this rotting stink hole in the first place, and the whole reason he wanted out. He picked out one, it was very old and full of holes from when he would attach it to a dart board and throw darts at it. The photo was of a ten year old boy with spiky blond hair who had an overall look of smugness that only boiled his blood further.

Bart Simpson! The whole reason he, Robert Underdunk Terwilliger or better known by his stage name, Sideshow Bob was in this mess in the first place. He hated the boy with a passion to rival Napoleon Bonaparte's hatred of the English, Harry Potters hatred for Snape, Fox's hatred for proper quality programming and even the worlds hatred of Simon Cowell combined.

He hated the boy because he had foiled several of his master schemes, the first of which was to frame Krusty the Clown by robbing the Kwik-E-mart in the guise of Krusty, but the truth came out thanks to Bart, and Bob was locked up and sent to prison. But he didn't stay locked up for long, he got out and married an old crone he planned to eventually kill and steal her life savings, again the plan was foiled by Bart. Bob even tried to run for mayor of Springfield, again foiled by Bart, Bart, Bart! Those words echoed in his head each time becoming louder and louder and amplifying his hatred for the boy. He'd developed a murderous rage to kill Bart Simpson but whenever Bob managed to breakout he was foiled time and again. If he managed to break out yet again he'd track down and try to murder Bart again, a little repetitive he admitted and clichéd but there was a problem. No matter how clever and ingenious his plans were he was always out manoeuvred by Bart Simpson, and his smart-alic sister, Lisa.

That's who the other photo between the pages of the book was of, the photo was newer then Barts and showed a young girl with blond spiky punk like hair, Lisa Simpson. Usually he didn't bother with the sister, she was clever but Bob always considered Bart the target to murder. Sure she helped Bart catch him again and again but it was always Bart who had the last laugh, it was Bart's smug face he had pictured in his mind when his plans came tumbling down.

Lisa was only added to his hit list after a misadventure in Italy when he became the mayor of a small town in Tuscany. The people there loved him because of his freakishly huge feet which he used to squash the berries they harvested to produce their wine, they loved him so that they made him mayor of the town. He even had a wife and a son and they were happy together, for once Bob wasn't on the run and his life ambition wasn't to kill, kill, kill anymore. He had a wife a new life... until the Simpson family turn up and ruined it all. Lisa was his undoing there because unfortunately in Italy the young are allowed to drink wine at dinner and Lisa, unused to the sweet mature alcohol, couldn't handle the stuff and became drunk rapidly, she started blabbing about his former life in America, that he was once in prison for attempted murder on several counts. The towns people stripped him of his title and his role and rejected him, kicking him out of his new home. Now he had a boiling hatred of both of the Simpson kids especially Lisa, but 'especially' Bart.

He wanted to crush both photos in his hands there and then, to tear them to shreds, but what a guy had to do to get extra photos of your enemies in this prison was ridicules. Instead he slid the photos back into the bible on the page which described the end of days and returned it to his pillow. Then he unleashed his full rage on the pillow by repeatedly punching it and would continue to punch it until either his anger ebbed away or the guard came, whichever came first. It turned out to be the guard and Bob quickly pretended to be asleep as the guard past. How he wanted to kill the two Simpson kids, but first he had to work out a way to escape this hellish place.

Crash, bash, bang! Bob felt wide away as the wall of his cell furthest from the bars came crumbling down in a large pile of masonry and dust. When the dust cleared he could see through the wall a large grey creature with an incredibly long snout, an elephant? What was that doing here? It raised its long snout and gave a loud trumpet as it moved through his cell, broke down his bars and continued into the hall, stamping its feet.

Through the broken wall then came several armed police officers and animal control officers brandishing tranquiliser guns, they passed him without notice and continued into the hall were the elephant continued to stamp around causing chaos. The animal control officers were then followed through the hole in his cell by the chief of police himself Clancy Wiggum and his partners Lou and Ed.

"Oh hi bob!" said the chief cheerily "Don't worry, this is just an attempt to recapture an escaped elephant"

"Hey Chief" said Lou "Shouldn't we have tried to recapture these animals after they first escaped?"

"There's a very good reason we didn't do that first, Lou" Wiggum said as if he was about to say something incredibly impressive that would explain it all away "I'm an incompetent police officer" he said as if this explained everything, and ironically it did.

The chief turned back to Bob and gave him one of those looks to show he really meant business "Now Bob, do you promise not to escape while we catch this elephant?"

"Oh, well if that's all, then I promise that I will 'not' attempt to escape through this great big hole in my cell" he said as if this had never occurred to him, he spoke in a voice which showed he was well educated, but then his voice adopted a very dark undertone "to escape from this dark, rotting, stinking hell hole and get revenge on those who put me away?" then his voice went back to its normal well-spoken manner "Really Wiggum the thought never really crossed my mind!" Bob added and the chief of police bought and swallowed this quicker than a cupcake at a bake sale.

"Good enough for me" the fat idiot said as he climbed the rubble to go help with the capture of the escaped titan. "You see boys, you always have to outsmart these master criminals, they all think they're smarter than the law."

But as these words left Wiggums mouth he failed to notice Sideshow Bob was already through the broken wall, past the guards and out into the court yard. He could see the hole in the outer wall of the prison where his grey saviour broke in. He took a step closer to the hole to freedom when, BAM! A long stick of wood swung up from the ground and bashed him in the face. He grumbled under his breath as he took the rake he'd stood on and tossed it out of the way. He ran for freedom as fast as his freakishly large feet could carry him, almost there, almost! He climbed through the hole and he was free, free at last! He took a step forward and bash! Another wooden rake fired up and slammed into his face. He grumbled his annoyance as he picked it up and threw it away before disappearing into the forest.

He was free, free to plot and plan his ultimate revenge on Bart Simpson and his sister. Plus of course all those other murders he failed in the past, plus he was dying to savour those delightful Twinkies again, you can never get them on the inside.

* * *

**4 weeks later…**

9:10 am

"Okay class, welcome back to school" said Miss Hoover unenthusiastically as she called out the roll call to see who was in the class or not "James?" "Present" "Christopher?" "Present" "Lisa?" "Present" "Ralph?" "I'd like a present too, please" said the little boy.

Lisa turned to look at Ralph, he was still his awkward 'special' self so that hadn't changed much in the four weeks they'd been away. Everyone around her looked dull and tired like they didn't want to be there but Lisa felt full of energy and enthusiasm, she had been looking forward to this day ever since it was announced. She was ready to learn and earn her large A's, not those fake ones mom would give her when she was feeling blue for not being in school.

Bart however was less than enthusiastic, he took moms lipstick to try to painting chicken pocks on his face and used hot water bottles and a hair dryer to heat his face up. However there was one little flaw in his plan he didn't bank on, he'd already had chicken pocks when he was four and he didn't notice that the heat from the hair dryer and hot water bottles caused his pocks to start streaming down his face. He never noticed this when he told mom he had chicken pocks and of course she didn't fall for it.

He'd sulkily boarded the bus to school which was driven by Otto, who was sitting in the drivers seat with a strange lamp in his hands with a lighter under it. A bubbling noise came from the lamp object and appeared to be breathing in the vapour coming from the spout. At first Otto didn't move off and was wondering out loud "why there were so many seats in my room?" until someone reminded him he was driving a bus and genuinely seemed surprised he was. He moved off and all seemed to go well, but Lisa's nerves were slightly on edge when Otto blurted out "Oh look! A giant fish!" while driving on the wrong side of the road. This wasn't new, they were all used to Ottos odd behaviour, he'd been their bus driver for years and despite causing several accidents he always managed to get them to school on time, mostly.

Miss Hoover, a tall woman, by Lisa's standards at least, with shoulder length brown hair and a large pair of glasses finished the roll call, opened her draw and removed a wad of papers. "Okay class" she said bored "We're going to have a surprise quiz to start off"

"WOOO HOOOO!" Lisa cheered attracting the attention of dozens of pairs of eyes which looked at her as if she had grown two heads. But she didn't care this test gave her the opportunity to show how she could still outshine the rest in the class.

Miss Hoover walked around and passed each of them a paper to write out before coming to sit back down at her own desk with a mug of coffee and a magazine about something completely inappropriate for a school.

"You have one hour to finish this test, starting now" she said sitting down and opening her magazine not even bothering to start a stop watch or anything to keep the correct time. Lisa didn't care about that though as she enthusiastically opened her paper and read the first question.

'1: What year was the declaration of independence signed?' that was an easy one. '2: Which president chopped down a cherry tree?' also easy. In fact mostly all of these questions were easy, predictably easy. These questions were never really a challenge for her but they did allow her to show off her own intelligence.

'31: Name the merits of being a teacher of 2nd grade' huh? That wasn't a proper question, what's wrong with Miss Hoover? Lisa thought annoyingly as she felt a spark run through her head and her brain came up with a new thought. _A better question would be '31: Using Darwin's theory of evolution explain former President Bush'_

She shook her head for a moment. That was her ID again still trying to cause her trouble. For weeks she hardly heard a peep out of her inner demons except for a few times when she got a little annoyed, a little voice in her head makes a very smart-alic remark. She admitted her ID had started manifesting itself in very violent ways to start with but after a few days she regained a greater deal of control over her own mind and a week after wearing the Mask she steadily started to calm down until she felt pretty much her old self again, though the most her ID did now was just whisper in her ear, in a manner of speaking, but even that small affect was beginning to fade away.

'32: If the answer is 5%, what is the question?' this was another stupid question! That could be anything 'If you have 100, what % of it is 5?' 'How much land in Springfield is used to farm?' 'In the world, how many Hillbillies have married outside their own family?' 'How many average Americans can find Iraq on a map of Iraq?' 'How many British people have straight, clean teeth?' _Stop being clever!_ She told herself _just focus on the question_.

She continued trying to find reasonable answers to these otherwise absurd questions, it was as if Miss Hoover didn't really want to teach this class at all. Several other ridicules questions came up and she could hear smart-alic remarks from deep in her mind, like question 44: 'What was the curse of Tutankhamun?' to which her inner self replied '_the line waiting to get into the museum to see him!_' and again and again until she got to question 50.

'50: Tick the box A, B or C, to receive the grade, A, B or C.' was she reading that one right? She refused to listen to another smart remark from her ID as she ticked the A box. After that question she put down her pen and looked at the clock, out of the hour she had to do the test she had 50 minutes left. Time which she spent going through the question paper again to make sure she had the correct answers.

"When you're finished…" said Miss Hoover who noticed Lisa had finished and was waiting for Miss Hover to mark her paper and give Lisa her well dissevered A. But a perplexed look crossed Lisa's face when Miss Hoover said. "...Turn your own papers over and mark them" she said as she returned to her magazine.

* * *

11:30am

Bart Simpson hated school more than anything, he had to spend several hours of his life in a building with adults and teachers talking at him, even though they knew he wasn't paying any attention or even cared.

At least when he attacked the school, something he still had no memory of doing, he had four weeks of freedom away from this prison of his but there had been a sting in the tail to his actions. Those four weeks had to come out of his summer vacation time meaning he did all that for nothing. He should've gone a step further and blown up the school he decided.

Speaking of which he'd almost forgotten about that Mask of his, he never found it in Lisa's room no matter how many times he looked. Lisa had stolen it he was sure but she would've worn it again by now wouldn't she? Who wouldn't want to have such mischief making power?

Lisa had eventually told him, when she calmed down after he wrecked her room, that she felt the thing was dangerous and threw it out, he couldn't believe what he was hearing when she said that, she threw it away? That was three weeks ago and he now just accepted that it was lost. The best present he ever got and Lisa threw it out! He got back at her though, he filled her only pair of sandals with runny porridge.

Oh well, at least for a while he had it and felt its power and had the ability to do whatever he liked for one night.

His teacher Mrs Krabappel, a tall woman with shoulder length, light brown hair and small bags under her eyes was just as boring as ever. She was attempting to teach them something to do with maths but he wasn't really listening, he knew how to add and subtract wasn't that enough? Nothing the teacher said was catching his attention because he was more interested in his latest prank on the teachers of Springfield Elementary.

The day before, he'd gone to visit Grandpa Simpson in the Springfield retirement centre, it wasn't his choice to go there, it had been Lisa's. She'd volunteered to help out at the retirement centre and he was curious to find out what Lisa was doing in there. So his brain kind of twisted his arm to make him go in.

When he went inside he was immediately swamped by a crowed of old people all wanting to talk to him, share boring war stories or in the case of the grandmas give him chocolates which he obliged especially for free chocolate.

It turned out Lisa was helping out by calling the bingo numbers in the bingo hall and helping elderly people with their crosswords to which they gave her the attention and praise she wasn't getting at school anymore.

Disappointed at his discovery Bart decided to leave but not before saying a quick 'hi' to Grandpa Simpson, this was so he could say to mom he'd gone to see him already this week so she didn't drag him out to see him again for another week. But on his way out he spotted a bottle by Grandpa's bedside. It was a brown medication bottle with half the label missing, on the side was half a word 'Viag..' the rest was scrapped off but what remained of the label discribed it as 'Sildenafil' a medication to help prevent something called 'pulmonary hypertension' by 'relaxing the walls of the right ventricle of the heart', whatever that meant and that side effects included 'stiffness in the...' whatever was supposed to come next was missing because the rest of the label was smudged. Bart wondered if this the stuff that made old people walk all stiff and slow like they all do. Then he started to think of the possibilities he could use it for. An unmarked bottle of unknown medication with unknown side effects, he thought, the first ingredient for a perfect prank. That's when he had a very mischievous idea, he took the bottle without a second thought and just today he opened the bottle and poured the stuff into the teachers coffee machine with the help of Milhouse.

Now though, Bart was awaiting the effects, to watch the teachers walk like old people. But it had been an hour since Mrs K. finished her coffee and she was just as boring and slack jointed as ever. He sighed, his eyes drooping and almost closed them in case he accidentally learnt something.

"Bart Simpson, report to the principal's office immediately!" said Principle Skinner over the schools intercom system. Mrs. Krabappel turned to Bart and gave him a look which said she wasn't the least bit surprised, she pointed her chalk stick at the door lazily indicating for Bart to get up and go, which he did glad for an excuse to leave.

As he walked down the corridor towards Skinners office he was met with a very unusual sight. It was groundskeeper Willie, the Scottish groundskeeper of the school grounds, he had a main of fire red hair with a hairy mono-brow and a beard to match, he was dressed in his usual dirty overalls but that wasn't the odd thing about him, what was odd was the way he was walking, humped back and bent kneed.

"What happened to you?" Bart asked, curious to Willies condition.

"Willie drank some of that teachers coffee" he said in a rough Scottish accent as struggled past "now Willie is all stiff"

_What the...?_ Bart thought, Willie drank that coffee he put the Viagra in, is that what it did to people, make them walk like the hunchback of what's-it-called? Willie wasn't walking like an old person at all, more like someone who had just swiftly kicked him between the legs.

Bart continued to the principal's office though he was curious why Mrs. K wasn't walking like Willie was. Standing outside a door with the words 'Principle Seymour Skinner' painted on it Bart reached out and knocked twice before opening the door before Skinner told him to enter.

"You called?" Bart said inviting himself to sit down in a chair in front of Skinners desk, Bart looked very relaxed and cool, he'd gone through this so many times in his life it was almost routine. The miserable man did not look happy and as far as Bart knew he never did, he was also giving an accusing look at Bart. If there was a prank pulled anywhere on school grounds Bart was often proud to say he'd done it even if he never did it himself.

"What did you put in Willie's drink?" Skinner asked, Bart just leaned back in his chair and reserved his right to remain silent.

"I've just been talking to Willie outside when he drank something, and..." he trained off as if searching for more appropriate words "started moving incredibly stiffly. It's obviously a prank, one which points firmly towards you Bart Simpson." But Bart just played it innocently and very badly innocently.

"Bart you've got after school detention" he said almost dully since he was so used to giving him so many detentions. Detention was usually Bart writing out lines on a chalk board, something he was so used to now he could write out the whole blackboard in a few minutes, Bart often wondered if he broke the world record for as many detentions as one could get before turning eleven.

It wasn't until a long boring speech later that Skinner told him to get back to class. As Bart was leaving though he saw Skinner pick up what looked like a steaming fresh cup of coffee from his desk and take a sip. Bart just smiled mischievously as he opened the door and went back into the corridor and headed back to class.

* * *

1:35 pm

Across Town

Grandpa Simpson was in the local police station complaining because someone had stolen his medication.

"Someone stole my Viagra!" he screamed at the police officer on the desk, but the young whippersnapper wasn't taking him seriously. He just laughed out loud as the elderly Simpson repeated the crime again and again.

"Don't worry, sir" the officer giggled "I'll put out an APB on a 'hardened' criminal!" He laughed again. "Can you give us any information that can 'point' us in the right direction?"

"I need it to prevent my lungs dying" Grandpa complained almost hoarsely.

"I think it's more the trouser department it's supposed to work" the officer giggled. "But I think we'll be a bit 'hard' pressed to find people to take this case"

* * *

6:30pm

"…and that's how the French created prostitution" said Kent Brockman as he shuffled through his papers again, but Lisa wasn't paying attention. She was too busy studying as always since the schooling at Springfield Elementary was so terrible. The rest of the day had been taken up with nonsense and quizzes. The only time Miss Hoover got close to anything like teaching it was telling them to read chapters four and five out of their text books for the next hour. Lisa didn't mind this of course, she'd already read the book cover to cover and absorbed every word of it. But she could tell all the others were obviously bored out of their skulls.

Miss Hoover then left mysteriously for a couple of hours and left Ralph Wiggum in charge. How could she leave Ralph in charge? He didn't know anything. The first thing he tried to teach them was where boogers came from, the next thing he taught was where did babies come from and he went on to describe a strange version of it where he said the Stork picks babies off a magic tree in heaven then delivers them to families.

Lisa as ever tried to challenge his logic and say 'then where do baby storks come from?' to which Ralph just looked blankly as if considering his answer before saying 'I pooped in my daddies slippers.'

She decided to ignore Ralph and work on some math problems by herself, but Ralph spotted her doing this, picked up her work, claimed she wasn't paying attention and issued a detention to her that would last forever, something which would never stick anyway. Last time Ralph gave Jason in class a detention for breathing in and out slower than he was despite Jason having asthma. She never thought she'd think this, but she was glad to be home at least here she could study, learn and teach herself. She sat on the couch next to her dad in the TV room and half listened to the news to hear what was plaguing the world.

"Now for news much closer to home" Kent Brockman continued "the failed demolition of Springfield forest four weeks ago has been given the green light to try again thanks to a cash injection from Montgomery Burns"

"What!" Lisa almost shouted and nearly dropped her very thick book on Shakespeare.

"The last time the forest was due for demolition the mischievous, masked, Green Face intervened and scared the workforce away while wrecking the machinery. The site manager lumberjack Derek was released from Springfield Hospital after recovering from his traumatic encounter with Green Face and has agreed to go ahead with the demolition of the forest on one condition however, that they be accompanied by a priest."

"How could they do that?" Lisa said "You mean I went through all that and they're still going to go ahead!"

"That's the trouble fighting big business, Lisa" Homer said half bored "they're big"

Lisa ignored Homers comment, knowing she saved the forest was the only thing which made her feel wearing the Mask was worth any effort, even if it did mean her suffering her ID banging on her mind for a week. Now it turned out all she did was postponed it, they were going to go ahead and demolish the forest anyway. She scooped her book under her arm, got to her feet and walked away stamping her feet on the floor, leaving Homer with the TV.

Homer picked up the remote for the TV and began flipping through the channels looking for something else to watch. He only seemed to catch a few sentences of one program before flipping over to the next one.

~"This is an appeal for lost or abandoned dogs everywhere, if you find a lost dog call us, we're… ~ …The china hut! We provide quality food, you'll enjoy our service so much you'll… ~ …play with yourself for hours and hours, that's right it's the new Nintendo DS. Play as Mario in his newest adventure where he has the…~ …runs! He's got the ball ladies and gentlemen! He's past the first mark the second marker, oh my god what an enormous tackle... ~ …I wish mine was like that. But it is difficult to get a quality jag these days... ~ … and it was here, on this very spot in Waterloo, while watching the English charge towards him, that Napoleon Bonaparte… ~ …crapped himself"

He continued to flip through the channels. Though the transitions made the words between two programs or adverts make a sort of sense they didn't seem to register in his mind as he continued to flip through them.

"You want the truth? You can't handle the truth...~ …this is the Fox news Channel!~…you won't believe you're eyes!...~…because it's all a fiction. Well, don't you see? They made it all up to throw us off the scent, the real killer is…~…Jesus! How could you do this to me Martha! You ran off with the kids and you…~…sold them to…~… Indian restaurants" ~ "You know there's something funny about this stake, it tastes like…~…dung. The texture of this mound 'ere, see how moist it is? Shows that this little angry crock 'ere…~… eats at Krusty Burger!"

"Borrrring!" Homer said as he placed the remote down on the couch, he got up and walked out of the TV room into the kitchen. From the other side of the room the family dog Santa's little helper came into the room, sniffed at the remote momentarily before biting down on it and began chewing causing the channels to flip rapidly.

"Today we're discussing the rather controversial subject of 'creationism', factor or fiction?...~…fiction! Good night"

* * *

Lisa stamped into her bedroom, practically slammed the door and threw the book onto her bed. How could they just uproot and destroy an entire forest so mercilessly? Corporations didn't care about the environment or the people they served she'd learnt that at an early age, the only thing they cared about making money no matter what gets in the way. Burns was a multibillionaire why couldn't he just be content with the money he's got and leave the rest of the world alone?

People like Burns never listened to what people say, especially when the phrase 'killing the planet' comes into it. Burns and people like him didn't care that what they're doing might kill the planet in the future because by that time they'd be dead and buried. They just brush their problems under the carpet and let the future generations like her deal with it. Only problem with that was the next generation would be no better, and just pass it onto the next person like someone with a time bomb frantically passing it from person to person until the day it goes off and ends everything. Their ignorance at the harm they were doing just made her angry.

But dad was right, she can't possibly fight big corporations like that. They get experts fighting them like Green Peace and Friends of the Earth and they manage to do nothing but irritate corporations slightly. Lisa was not only alone in this town when it came do defending the environment, she was also only eight, who's going to take a little eight year old girl seriously? Whenever she tried to make a case to big corporations they sent guards to throw her out of the building and when she tried to preach the truth to the people on the street they didn't take her seriously, instead they just patronised her and some just said how cute she was trying to 'fight the power with intelligent reasonable arguments before the power easily silenced her intelligence reasonable argument by sticking their fingers in their ears.'

She was surrounded by idiots who didn't want to hear the truth. Humans evolved on this planet so we should take better care of it, she thought, trashing the planet was like trashing your own room and house, what idiot did that?... What was she thinking, Bart trashes his own room and he 'is' an idiot.

If only there was something she could do to finally get people to leave the environment alone, at least in Springfield. If there was anything she could do to help the environment and the endangered animals she'd gladly help out.

Lisa's eyes momentarily fell on the spot below her computer desk where the Mask still resided. She never had a chance to dispose of it safely because she found it difficult to bring Homers tools up from the garage to her room because mom was always in the kitchen would get suspicious, and Lisa couldn't bring the Mask down to the tools because mom or worse Bart might catch her with it. So she just left it in its hiding place, there was no way someone would have a reason to look under the floorboards under her desk for anything never mind a magic mask. But then a thought crossed her mind, she wanted to prevent the destruction of the forest again once and for all, it had worked before with the Mask and she did have some small degree of control over herself if she only wore it for a short time, perhaps if she were to just...

But she stopped herself in mid step, hands on the desk ready to retrieve the Mask. "Nahh!" she said finally letting go of the desk and pushed the thought out of her head.

* * *

"Looking good boys" said Wiggum observing the heavy machinery and bulldozers as they were moved into Springfield forest, into the site where four weeks ago Green Face attacked the workers there.

"Hey chief are you sure this is a good idea?" Lou asked as he watched another truck rumble past. "I mean Green Face is a nasty piece of work, do you really want to annoy him?"

"Don't worry Lou, I saw this plan work on Columbo." He said "If Green Face is concerned about the environment then he should show up to stop its destruction for a second time. Just make sure backup is ready."

"Yeah, but chief, errm" Lou scratched the back of his head.

"What is it Lou? Are you afraid of a man in a mask?" he said in a mocking tone, he placed his hands on the cheeks of his face and adopted a mock horrified look to his face.

"Oh yeah, and what did you do when Eddie came to the Halloween party last year dressed like Freddy Kruger"

"Hey, HEY! I thought we weren't going to mention that again!" they both fell silent, that was one embarrassing moment for Wiggum, when Eddie brandished those razor claws at him role-playing as the nightmare hopping demon. It was also an expensive financial moment because Wiggum couldn't get the return deposit on his own Jack Sparrow costume because he couldn't get the stain out of the trousers.

"Say chief" Lou asked again trying to make polite conversation "Won't your wife be mad staying out all night again on a stake out?" Chief Wiggum sighed a large sigh.

"No, no, she's still angry about last week" he said

"What happened?"

"She came into the bedroom in a new dress she bought and said 'Clancy, does this dress make me look fat'" he tried to adopt the softer tone of his wife's voice as he quoted her.

"You... didn't say it did, did you?"

"Of course not, what kind of idiot do you take me for!" Wiggum almost shouted at his partner.

"Whoa, whoa, chief calm down" Lou held up his hands to show he meant no offence at all "So what did you say?"

"I said..." he mimicked the voice he used when he said this to her, innocent and sweet with a hint of seduction about it "'of course it doesn't make you look fat, dear. It's just all those donuts that make you look fat.'"

* * *

**To Be Continued...**

* * *

**Authors notes:** Just a little set up for what's coming next.

I was considering cutting the whole gag with the Viagra because I didn't know if it would make the story fall outside its current rating. But since I only mentioned very vaguely what it does and since I didn't go into detail about the main effects I let it stay in. I also tried to be a subtle as I could about it.

If it requires an upgrade in its rating, tell me and I'll move it up. Or alternatively I'll just cut the whole gag.


	12. The Mask Returns

**Chapter 11**

**The Mask Returns**

Homer J. Simpson yawned as he descended the stairs while simultaneously scratching his backside. Sleeping was his third favourite thing in the world after drinking and eating and the night previous he'd done a lot of drinking, whether sleet or snow or traffic he'd always make it to Moe's Tavern, every Friday... Saturday... Sunday, Monday Tuesday, Wednesday and... Thursday and Friday and Saturday and Sunday. Nothing but him and the sweet, sweet taste of Duff bear on his tongue.

"Mmmmm, Duff bear Aghhhh!" he drooled as he continued down to the ground floor where he could smell the unmistakable scent of cooking bacon as it sizzled in the pan. "Mmmmmm, bacon, Aghhhh"

There was nothing better than bacon after drunk he decided as his nose began leading him down stairs more than his eyes. The only thing which could make this morning any better was more Duff bear.

Homer had often been told by some people that he had a drinking problem and that he couldn't live a month without beer. To prove them wrong Homer decided to go a whole month without a single drop of beer to the immediate shock of Moe the bartender who saw Homer as part of his regular income.

Giving up drinking had been the hardest thing Homer had ever done in his life, because Homer J. Simpson had attempted to resist himself. That jerk wasn't the boss of him, why should he do what Homer wanted to do? He didn't stop though Homer kept trying to sneak some alcohol into his coffee, his food, he even went so far as to laced his own sandwich with alcohol and even snuck some into his heart medication. But Homer came out on top of himself and resisted at every turn, mostly because Marge seemed genuinely proud of him for giving up alcohol so much so he was on the brink of never drinking again, ever. Even Barney Gumball, his best drinking buddy -who was an alcoholic gone on a relapse- was pleased with Homer at accomplishing what he had trouble with, giving up bear. Barney then said the trademarks of an alcoholic were slurred words, the inability to make logical decisions, the inability to stop drinking alcohol and –this was the clincher for Homer- taking a month off booze just to prove to your friends that it didn't matter to you. _That was a trademark of a true alcoholic?_ Homer thought, and so from that day forth he vowed never to go a day without some form of liquor or alcohol being poured down his gullet, he was prepared to do it so he never ever became an alcoholic again.

As he approached the front door something was pushed through the mail box, envelopes and packages. The mailman again? What's with that guy! He comes by every day -except Sundays- why couldn't he leave him alone? The police would never do anything because the mailman always claimed to be delivering the mail!

"Prove it!" Homer would exclaim.

"HERE" the mailman would say thrusting a package and envelopes into his hands before walking away.

"Yeah you'd better walk away!" Homer would call after him before slamming the door. But this time he'd pushed that stuff through the letter slot before Homer had even reached the ground floor. What's with that guy now, what's his angle?

Homer peered out of the mail slot to make sure the mailman was going, "lousy mailman" he muttered before he knelt down and picked up the wad of envelopes. He thought the mail was the most boring part of the morning but he opened them up anyway.

The first one it was a simple electric bill

"Junk" Homer said as he tossed it over his shoulder into a trash can behind him.

The next one read _'Congratulations you have won 1 million dollars in cash, simply bring your winning ticket to your local Kwik-E-Mart to claim your winnings'_

"Junk!" Homer proclaimed as he tossed it over his shoulder and into the waiting trashcan and he opened the next one

'_Dear. Homer J. Simpson_

_This is you final warning, if you are unable to pay your debts we will be forced to call in the loan sharks'_

"Junk!" Homer said again as he screwed up the paper and tossed it over his shoulder again to land in the trash. He opened the next one.

'_Dear sir or madam'_ it began

"What? How dare they say that!" Homer said out loud. How the hell did they know, he didn't tell anyone about it! He was only in college and he was in an exploratory phase at the time, anyway the procedure was interrupted. How could they send such a nasty slur? 'Dear sir **or** madam' as if they didn't know. He should sue these guys, he didn't even want that sex change operation, he was just drunk and he thought he was signing up for the army!

In his rage he screwed the letter up very tight before throwing it in the trash. There was one letter left which he opened expecting more junk mail.

'_Dear Mr. Simpson and family_

_You have won the annual Springfield perfect lawn competition. To receive your award please arrive at the Springfield convention centre by 10:00pm, there will follow drinks and music from a live band. Please note however, children are not allowed at the venue._

_Regards_

_The Springfield annual lawn competition organisers'_

"WOOOH HOOOO!" Homer celebrated, "Who's the daddy, who's the daddy!" he said dancing while holding the letter in his hands "I won something and this time I didn't have to cheat for it!"

His family however were more suspicious by this letter. When Homer read the good news he ran into the kitchen to show everyone he'd won something. They all stopped eating their breakfast and gave him a suspicious look. None of his family believed he'd really won anyway, especially Lisa who was never happy if Homer wins something and if he cheats to get something she's all 'boohoo, you've cheated, something you've always told us was wrong' or 'Dad you never entered this competition' or 'Dad! You really need to pay these loan sharks' or 'Dad, you're not supposed to eat the toothpaste'

"Homer, Lisa's right" Marge said to him interrupting his thoughts "I don't remember ever entering a lawn competition"

"Oh, come on Marge, they don't enter you for competitions these days" Homer said "they wander the streets with clipboards and judge who has the better lawn, it's how they make a living."

"Homer, you haven't mowed that lawn for months, it's like a jungle out there!"

"Oh come on, Marge" Homer moaned "you're over exaggerating"

* * *

**Meanwhile outside in the back yard.**

The family dog, Santa's Little Helper was in the middle of the back yard idly sniffing at the nearest tree, the grass has grown biblically long making the place look like an actual jungle. In the shadows cast by these large blades of grass a pair of eyes watches the small dog menacingly, it began to make a low growl as it spotted its prey.

A large savage lion leaped out at the Santa's Little Helper but before it's claws could sink into the skinny dog's hide the beast was shot down quickly by a tranquiliser dart which hit it in its back leg.

"We've caught another one" Wiggum said in triumph as he came through the long grass with a machete chopping at the tall grass, he was followed by Lou and Ed and several animal control officers.

"I can't believe it's taken us four weeks to find this lion" said Lou as several animal control officers descended to remove the fallen predator. "He looks in a bad way as well" Lou said, the lion was very scrawny as if it had been starved for days, it was then Lou noticed the great beast was wearing what looked like a very large retainer around its teeth, wiring its jaws shut completely shut.

"Lions will never learn will they" Wiggum said plucking at the lions retainer as the animal control officers took it away "Though human meat is tasty it's incredibly bad for your teeth"

As the officers turn to leave with the lion Wiggum momentarily turned to Lou.

"How's the search for Sideshow Bob coming?" Wiggum asked

"No leads so far chief" Lou said

"Funny" Wiggum said scratching the hair under his cap "it's almost as if he doesn't want to be caught"

* * *

**Back inside the Simpson residence**

Homer was still being defiant

"Never the less, they have spoken" Homer said. "and I've got two tickets to the venue Marge" Homer said in a soft spoken almost seductive voice "We can have a night away from the kids"

"Oh, Homie" Marge said "But its tonight, we need to organises a babysitter for the kids"

"Ohhhh, but they cost money" Homer moaned, it was usually hard finding a babysitter anyway, especially one who would babysit that menace of a son of his "Let's just leave them alone, the boys eleven he can look after them"

"Homer, don't you remember the last time we left the kids to look after themselves"

"Of course I remember!" Homer countered

"Okay, what happened?" Marge crossed her hands over her chest as Homer counted off the things that happened on his fingers.

"Bart broke his arm, Maggie got high on caffeinated ice-cream and Lisa was accused of taking drugs and it ruined her babysitting career"

"Exactly!" Marge said. Homer remained silent for a little while as he mulled over what he just said.

"You're point being what?" he shrugged. Marge moaned.

"Alright, alright, I'll get us a babysitter" Homer gave in.

Marge happy with Homer finally deciding to hire a babysitter turned to the youngest of the Simpson family, Maggie. A younger, smaller looking version of Lisa with the same pointy hair style, only she had a small blue bow in it. Marge attempted to feed Maggie Simpson her breakfast of mushy peas, but the baby was fidgeting and resisting, instead preferring to bite down on her teething ring and even the edge of her highchair.

"Jeez, what's with her?" Homer asked

"She's teething" Marge said as she parted Maggies gums "Take a look" she said proudly "Her first baby tooth" a single white tooth had grown through Maggies soft gums which was surrounded by trails and trails of thick saliva and spit.

"Eww" Homer, Lisa and Bart all shivered at the sight of it.

"I think I lost my appetite" said Homer pushing his breakfast out in front of him.

"Me to" said Lisa pushing hers away as well

"Me three" Bart added pushing his own away into the middle of the table and at the sight of three plates of unattended, uneaten breakfast Homer perked up again.

"Wait, mine came back!" he said quickly as he claimed all three plates and began wolfing it all down so fast it might as well have been on a conveyer belt leading into his mouth.

* * *

The babysitter Homer got wasn't what Marge expected, she'd expected Patty or Selma or even Ned Flanders, but instead Homer got his father to come babysit for them. Something she was against since the last time he babysitted the kids the morning afterwards she found his false teeth in the kettle after Homer made himself a cup of coffee.

"It's the perfect solution, Marge" he'd said "we know him, he knows us and we won't have to pay him anything"

"When can I get my eye drops back?" Grandpa muttered

"You get it when you're finished babysitting" Homer said harshly back

"Who said that?" Grandpa had said confused.

Though Marge wasn't happy about the arrangement it was too late now, she'd already changed into her best looking dark blue dress, done her makeup, applied lipstick, eyeliner, mascara, washed her hair and dried it, and so forth over the last four hours. She'd put too much effort into getting ready for this party nothing was going to stop her enjoying her night out and as long as Grandpa can keep the kids under control then he can babysit them.

Getting ready had been a pain because the kids always kept bothering her. 'Mom where's this? Mom, what are you doing? Mom, Barts making faces at me! Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom. Why couldn't the kids leave her alone for five minutes?

"Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom" she realised that wasn't just going around her head, someone was actually trying to get her attention. It turned out to be Bart "Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom" he said almost in a chant like a skipping record. "Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom"

"I cannot believe I was so happy when you first said that word to me" she said drearily, had she just said that out loud? "What is it Bart?" she said quickly.

"Why did you get Grandpa to babysit us, I'm eleven now why can't I be in charge?" he said. Marge knew Bart still resented the time they got Lisa to babysit him and Maggie while they were out. Bart had deliberately made things difficult for Lisa and it ended with him falling down the stairs and breaking his arm.

"Hmm" Marge moaned a little "Bart, babysitting isn't about being older, it's about responsibility and maturity"

It was in this awkward moment that Grandpa actually came into her bedroom mouthing words in his gums because he didn't have his teeth in. "The dogs got my teeth, and I'm cold, I'm hungry, my feet hurt, and I gotta pee but I keep missing the bowl."

Marge couldn't do anything but moan at both Grandpa's ineptitude and Barts smug look on his face.

* * *

Lisa Simpson loved to read, she loved books from autobiographies to text books, from science fiction to science fact, but she had a very soft spot for fantasy novels. She enjoyed books like Twilight and Harry Potter when it first came out. She read at an advanced level for her age and could read all the Harry Potter books, even the four large thick ones in a few days. She didn't know why she was drawn to fantasy, it just had a certain magic to it she found irresistible.

The book she was reading now was J. R. R. Tolkien the Lord of the Rings, the Two Towers. She'd seen the movies, okay good high production values and they remained faithful to the original story but she always preferred the books themselves to any movie adaption they make after all the best movie was one the imagination could cook up.

Homer seemed to be a pretty good example of that. While they were all coming out of the theatre after watching _Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince_ he for some reason muttered how 'the characters should've seen the death of Dumbledore coming' because Homer realised 'Aslan was actually a woman in disguise as a lion who was working for the evil galactic empire. She wanted to prevent the Ring from falling into the hands of the Muggles in case they got smart and caused a revolution that would overthrow the president of the Timelords.

He'd obviously got bored and mixed up Star Wars, Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings and the Chronicles of Narnia with an episode of Columbo and Doctor Who into one single movie. Well, if the best movie is one your own imagination can create Lisa thought, then Homer seemed happy enough with his own version of _Half Blood Prince._

She was halfway through this book, the Two Towers, Pippin and Merry had been picked up by Treebeard, the giant tree creature or 'Ent' as they were called in the book. If only Ents were real, then the trees in Springfield forest could fight back against that logging company. It still plagued her mind thinking all those defenceless trees were being cut down and no one was lifting a finger to stop them.

How many defenceless creatures had she fought for, how many times had she tried to reason with people on the streets, during a town meeting or with the mayor himself? How much difference had she made? None, they always ignored her. She closed her eyes and tried to push this out of her mind, she was just still annoyed with Mr. Burns and this stupid forest business.

In a few hours she'd have something to take her mind off it anyway, because Mom and Dad were going to go out to this venue at the Springfield convention centre. Meaning they were leaving her, Bart and Maggie alone with Grandpa, who had a reputation of being absent minded, often he forgot he was even supposed to take care of them and acted like he was in the home dad dumped him in years ago.

This could either be a bonus or a nightmare, because when Grandpa was in charge all three could do whatever they liked and Grandpa wouldn't lift a finger to stop them. Usually if Bart, Maggie and herself worked together they could have a blast. But Bart was still in a mood about his lost Mask. Though the tension had cooled she could tell he subtly still hated her for 'throwing it out' and as soon as Mom and Dad left she knew he'd exact his revenge somehow, probably with some massive childish prank. But then again Bart had played so many pranks on her in her life she doubted if he could do anything more embarrassing to her.

She returned to her book and continued reading.

* * *

Marge descended the stairs dressed in her best blue dress and had done herself up nicely. Homer had also made a somewhat of an effort dressed in a dark blue suit with shirt and matching tie, but the only thing Marge objected to was the buzz cola drinking cap he had on his head with the straws snaking into his mouth. She made him take it off before they intended to leave.

Suddenly the lights all over the house dimmed a little before winking out plunging the house into complete darkness.

"AH!" Homer screamed "HELP ME, SOMEONE HELP ME, I'M GOING BLIND!" Then the lights suddenly returned back to their normal brightness.

"Never mind" Homer said causally "false alarm"

"Homer" Marge said fixing her husband with one of her suspicious looks she reserved for when he was up to something "did you call an electrician to fix the junction box in the basement?" Homer blew air through his lips, his way of saying there wasn't any point.

"Marge, I fixed it free of charge" he said proudly, but one look at Marge's face told him she wasn't impressed.

"Oh come on" Homer said in his defence "If TV has taught me anything, it's that stuff can be fixed with chewing gum and paper clips" Marge moaned again and gave him that look she reserved for when she knew he meant well but it wasn't really good enough.

"Maybe we should call a trained electrician in the morning" she said, concern in her voice because she feared if Homer went down to deal with it again he'd probably kill himself.

As they were making final preparations to leave they gathered Grandpa, Bart, Lisa and Maggie near the front door for the usual 'tell them to behave speech'.

"Okay Grandpa" Marge said "Make sure Bart and Lisa are in bed by ten, Maggies baby food is in the refrigerator, make sure Bart and Lisa brush their teeth before they go to bed and don't leave your medication on the floor again."

"Don't worry, I'll watch them like a hawk" Grandpa said as his voice took on a very dark tone "and if they even try to climb that barbed wire fence to freedom I'll give them what's coming to them."

"Umm, Right" Marge said as she turned to Lisa.

"Now Lisa, Maggies food is in the fridge..." Marge began to explain, but Lisa cut across and finished speaking her instructions very quickly, they were usually the same instructs she left Lisa with anyway "...keep Grandpa's medication away from Maggie, make sure Grandpa doesn't try to climb any stairs and the number to dial is 911 to call for an ambulance if he stops breathing for more than three minutes" she recited.

"Good" she said turning to Bart "and Bart..." she hesitated for a moment "...just be good"

"I'll be as good as Amy Winehouse is clean" Bart said with enthusiasm. Marge however knew who Bart was talking about, -some pop singer in Britian who shared Marge's tall hair style which someone pointed out to her one day in the Kwik-E-Mart- Amy Winehouse was never 'clean' in the respect that she wasn't pumping herself full of drugs and Marge suspected that was the type of double bluff Bart was planning.

"No, good-er than that" Marge insisted.

"Ohhh, ay Caramba!" Bart said irritated.

She doubted if Bart would be good, but a mother could always hope their boy behaved like the sort of boy a mother always wanted, a girl.

She gave each of them a hug and a goodbye kiss on the forehead except for Grandpa who had fallen asleep where he stood.

She turned to leave and Homer opened the door for her like a true gentleman but stepped through it himself before ignorantly closing it in her face. She moaned as she opened the door again and went through it, closing it behind her. She crossed the lawn and got into the passenger seat of Homer's purple car.

"What kept you?" Homer said and Marge could only moan at Homers ignorance.

* * *

He watched from the shadows as the Simpsons battered purple car pulled out of the drive and drove off into the distance. Perfect, he reasoned as Sideshow Bob leaped over the fence and took a step forward BASH! As another carelessly left rake swung up and smashed into his face.

"Oh, for crying out loud!" he moaned, rakes, his second most mortal enemy before Bart. He picked up the rake and threw it away as he continued towards the house. He'd dressed himself completely in black clothes so he could blend in with the night, a black turtle neck with black pants –which here his usual orange prison pants dyed black- and shoes.

His plan was also so simple it was brilliant. He knew Homer would fall for that phoney invitation and move out almost immediately to pick up a prize which didn't exist. This got both Marge and Homer out of the house and on such short notice he knew they wouldn't be able to hire a babysitter in time and would instead fall back on either using Lisa as a baby sitter or getting Homers narcoleptic old father to do it for them. Either way it gave him easy access to both his targets and with no responsible adults to halter his progress he'll be able to kill the two Simpson kids with ease and be out of here before they knew what happened.

He'd planned everything down to the last detail during the four weeks of sweet freedom, and he'd calculated every possibly alternative, it was a plan worthy of the great chess masters themselves. It wasn't overly complicated so there was very little that could go wrong, but it was well planned out enough that nothing could possibly go wrong.

All he had to do now was gain entry via the basement, cut the phone line in the junction box and go upstairs to murder his intended targets. He chuckled darkly at the image he had in his head as he finally managed to disembowel Bart Simpson once and for all.

* * *

This wasn't going well, Lisa decided. Bart was already getting into mischief and Grandpa didn't have a clue how to babysit. In fact he often acted like the baby himself and still believed he was in the retirement home.

Lisa, being the most responsible person here decided she'd have to take control of the situation. First by making Grandpa a cup of tea to keep him happy, next by preparing Maggies supper, but when she came to give it to her she found Maggie with Grandpa on the dining room table.

"I think the babies dead" he said despite the fact that Maggie was still moving "she smells funny" Ugh! She did smell very rank, she's obviously done business in her diaper

"Grandpa, you have to change her diaper" she said to the elderly Simpson, who looked on and didn't seem to have a clue what to do, he looked like he was about to try but hesitated and stopped.

"Grandpa don't you remember how to change a diaper? You must've changed dads when he was a baby" she said

"Lisa, I'm an old man, I can't even change my own" he moaned

_Okay, too much information_, Lisa thought as Grandpa looked down at Maggie completely clueless as what to do.

"Oh I don't know how to take care of babies?" Grandpa asked as he turned to Lisa "You change her!"

"What makes you think I know how to take care of a baby?" Lisa countered

"You've been one more recently then I have!" Grandpa shot back.

Lisa signed and rolled her eyes, she put down Maggies supper and got to work changing her diaper.

"You know there is a story behind a diaper" Grandpa said as he began to go into one of his long drawn out stories. "The year was 1978, world war 2 was at its height and I was in a boxing ring with the leader of the Nazi party Adolf Hitler, who had a bowl problem, any who I...I...ZZZZZ" he trailed off and started snoring. Lisa's expression was one which showed she wasn't surprised in the least. Grandpa Simpson had fallen asleep, on his feet while in the middle of his story, only Grandpas' stories could be so obviously made up and so dull that it put the storyteller to sleep before the audience.

* * *

**Meanwhile across town in Moes' Tavern**

The phone rings and Moe picks it up

"Moes' Tavern" Moe said as he picked it up

"I'm looking for a Norwegian guy by the name of Onebal, first name Igotta"

"One moment I'll check" Moe said as he turned to his regular customers "Hey, Igotta Onebal, Igotta Onebal here, hey everybody listen Igotta Onebal"

All his regular suddenly burst out laughing and started pointing at him as if he'd done something funny, then he suddenly started to catch on.

"Hey wait a minute..."

* * *

On the other line Bart was in hysterics as he heard Moes usual threat from down the line. This wasn't his best prank call but Moe seemed to fall for whatever rude combination of words he came up with.

"Listen you! When I get hold of you I'll rip out your eye balls and force them up your..." the phone suddenly went dead. _Huh? What's wrong?_ Bart looked down at the receiver, nothing was wrong with it. There wasn't even the single tone of a phone on standby.

The lights suddenly dimmed a little before lighting right back up again and he was almost certain he heard a muffled scream coming from somewhere. It wasn't long before the lights came back on so did the monotone of the phone line.

* * *

Ouch! Bob thought as he dropped a pair of wire cutters from his hands and slowly let his other hand slide off the junction box. He'd tried to cut the wire which connected the telephone to the outside world, but for some reason when he cut into the wire he received a massive electric shock.

What he cut should've been the telephone wire he summarised as he held up a flashlight to view the junction box in full. Inside was a jumbled up mass of wires of varying colours. They must've had some pretty lousy repair people come in to check this thing, the wires weren't standard and there were a few paper clips inside. He was almost certain if he looked hard enough he'd find some string and a wad of bubble gum.

Bob decided to drop the 'cut the phone line' part of the plan, he only had to deal with one old man after all and that shouldn't be too difficult. He could handle the two children by himself perfectly. He turned and began ascending the stairs towards the ground floor.

* * *

The world according to Maggie Simpson was a colourful and exciting place, or it used to be until this pain in her mouth. It was a soft aching she's never experienced in her life, to stop it she bit down on her pacifier but it wasn't solid enough. Instead she pulled it out and picked up a ring shaped object which she bit down on with this new thing she had in her mouth.

She didn't understand why her mouth hurt so much, it was as if several things were trying to grow out of her mouth. As she did this she watched one of the giants walk past, the spiky haired one, the one the larger, fatter, no haired one called 'Homer' always called 'boy' or 'why you little!' but her mom called him 'Bart'. He was carrying a bucket downstairs which Maggie knew held a lot of small toy 'brum, brums'.

Bart and the other small giant called Lisa both seemed to have the most interesting toys though she couldn't understand what they were for or how to use them or what to do with them other then stick them in her mouth to see what they tasted like.

The tallest giant in the house right now was what looked like a wrinkly version of her father, or 'Homer' as mom seemed to call him. This one however was called 'Grandpa' and he stood in the middle of the room, head back making a very strange noise with his nose and mouth.

She bit down on the ring again, she didn't know how she knew that this is what it was for, she just knew it was hard enough to take the pain away. As she observed Grandpa who stood unmoving she began to wonder if he'd fallen asleep.

At the thought of the word sleep she seemed to start to become very drowsy, she stopped biting on the ring for a moment and yawned.

"Is Maggie ready for beddybye?" said a soft sounding voice. That was the little giant Lisa Simpson, Lisa looked similar to herself only she was taller managed to walk on her own two feet much better than her, she also wore a ring of bright white balls around her neck and didn't have a bow in her hair nor did she suck on a pacifier. Lisa didn't know what she was missing, Maggie thought as she picked hers up and placed it in her mouth before regarding Lisa again. She wondered if one day she'll grow up to be a little giant like Lisa.

Maggie yawned again and Lisa knelt down and picked her up and held her in her arms. She then began to carry her off up stairs. Maggie liked Lisa, she'd often play with her, trying to teach her how to say words like Ostentatious or Etiquette though Maggie didn't understand what they meant.

Unlike Bart, who didn't seem to have time for Maggie at all and when he did he was trying to teach her words like 'doo doo' 'crap' 'butt' and 'shi...shi...shhh...shhhhhh...zzzzz' Maggie didn't know why but as Lisa carried her upstairs she couldn't help falling gently into a blissful sleep.

* * *

Bart Simpson waited for Lisa to take Maggie upstairs to tuck the youngest Simpson in for the night before he was going to set out on his mission to prank his sister. When he was certain she was at the top of the stairs and out of sight he crossed over to the foot of the stairs and whistled pleasantly as he began to spread out a bucket of micro-cars all over the floor. With Lisa distracted this gave him time to set up some traps to catch her out when she comes back down stairs. He evenly spaced them out, making sure the miniature fire trucks had their ladders extended upwards so they would hurt Lisa if she fell on them.

He then carefully laid a rake he found outside on the floor near the field of micro-cars so she'd stand on it as she came down.

He actually had a list of pranks he wanted to try on Lisa tonight, each one more cruel and amusing then the last. Phase one and two were complete, micro-cars and rake, now to set out the rest. He was actually very sorry about the last time he'd ruined Lisa's babysitting career, but that was then this is now and he had a chance to ruin it all over again before it even started.

The next prank was the classic bucket of mud above the door routine. He'd set up the ladder next to the door going into the kitchen, he opened the door slightly, picked up the bucket of mud and climbed up to the top of the ladder. Carefully he balanced the bucket of mud on the door but also let it lean against the wall so when the door was fully opened it'd fall onto whoever opened the door. That wouldn't be Grandpa though, he'd stand where he was and sleep for hours and hours, it's what made him so lovable, that he'd start telling a boring war stories that wasn't one of the things that him lovable though, it's that you never got to hear his stories because Grandpa would actually fall asleep as he told them.

Suddenly he felt the ladder start to shift, which was sort of not good. The bucket wasn't balanced on the door so if he fell the bucket would fall on top of him covering him in thick mud and he'd had a bath already this week. Thankfully though the ladder was straightened and steadied as someone below grabbed it.

"Allow me" said a very soft spoken voice, at first the voice didn't register in Bart's head.

"Why thank you" he said as he straightened the bucket perfectly waiting for its intended victim. But then his eyes widened as the rest of his brain caught up with his ears. The bucket slipped from his shaking fingers and landed on the ground with a splat, spreading its mucky contents across the floor. Slowly Bart began to turn around while still standing on the top rung of the ladder, hoping with every fibre of his begin that it wasn't who he thought it was. As he turned and looked down towards the ground to who was holding the ladder and his blood ran cold. Evil, crazed eyes glared up at him with murderous intent from under long puffed out hair which made him look like a human palm tree. For a moment Bart couldn't say anything, his mouth moved but his voice wouldn't work.

The bushy haired man reached out to grab him and finally Bart found his voice and screamed at the top of it.

"AAAHHHHH! SIDESHOW BOB!"

"Oh come now we've been through so much together" Sideshow Bob smiled "Just call me Bob"

"AAAHHHHH! BOB!" Bart screamed again

* * *

Lisa thought she heard something from below and no doubt it was Bart who was undoubtedly up to something, a prank that she would be the butt of. Gently she pushed the covers over Maggie before turning to leave. The youngest member of the Simpson family had just drifted to sleep in seconds as she carried her up stairs. Lisa turned out the lights.

At least Maggie wasn't as much of a handful as last time when Bart got her to eat coffee ice-cream, the caffeine made her irritable. But now Lisa was just glad the baby Simpson would simply drift off to sleep this time. Now she only had Bart to contend with.

She stopped at the foot of the stairs and looked down and could see one of her brothers pathetic pranks right there on the floor. He'd set out his micro-cars all over the floor obviously so she'd slip on them as she came down. He must think she's blind anyone could spot them from where she was.

She descended the stairs and was careful to avoid each of the micro-cars by stepping between them. She then noticed another prank in the making, Bart had left a rake out for her to step on, oh yeah like she was going to fall for that. She avoided the rake and headed straight for the TV room where she planned to give Bart a piece of her mind. She noticed Grandpa just stood in the dining room head leant backwards as he continued to sleep while she did his job.

She found Bart on the sofa, at first she was surprised to find him tied up and struggling against his bonds with a gag in his mouth, but Lisa wasn't going to be fooled. Whatever prank he was playing she wasn't going to fall for it.

"Bart I don't know what prank your trying to pull, but I'm telling you now I'm not going to fall for it" she crossed her arms over her chest as Bart pathetically and unconvincingly struggled against his obviously fake bonds. He tried to muffle something at her but Lisa just looked unimpressed. As soon as she removed that gag he'd probably spit at her, or spew out something he was keeping in his mouth at her or something equally disgusting.

She waited for a few more seconds and when Bart wouldn't stop this stupid prank she decided to bite at the bait. She reached out and pulled off his gag, despite what prank he was about to pull and as soon as the gag was pulled away from Barts mouth he screamed at the top of his voice.

"LOOK OUT, SIDESHOW BOB!" the fear and terror in his voice was far too genuine to be anything but serious, but she had known Bart to lie and lie quite well before.

"Yeah, whatever Bart, if Bob escaped Chief Wiggum would've told us about it"

"I wouldn't be too sure about that, Lisa Simpson" Lisa's blood ran cold as she heard the soft spoken voice "As Wiggum described himself, he is an incompetent police officer" she slowly turned to see the figure standing behind her with bushy hair. Standing tall and dressed completely in black and holding a carving knife in his right hand was the crazy murderous form of Sideshow Bob.

"AAHHHHH! SIDESHOW BOB!" she screamed

"Oh come now that's starting to get annoying" Bob said. Lisa backed away from him until she felt the sofa at her back as Bob began to advance towards the two of them.

"You don't want to hurt me right?" Lisa said quickly almost giddily "Bart's always been your intended victim!"

"Thanks Lisa" Bart said in sarcasm from behind her. Bobs face then became reasonable as he began to explain his motives and reasons.

"Admittedly, Bart was the primary target, he prevented all my successful crimes after all" his face then twisted back into a mask of rage and anger "But you not only helped him, you directly destroyed my entire second life in Italy!"

"I didn't mean to!" Lisa said pushing her back deeper into the sofa almost willing the seat to just swallow her up so she could get out of here.

"Nobody meant to make so many Police Academy sequels either, but they did, and I'm the one in prison!" Bob reached out to grab her, but Lisa ducked and ran as fast as she could.

"RUN LISA!" Bart shouted as he extended his short tied up legs to trip Bob up. Bart failed to but it did slow Bob down a little.

As Lisa ran past Grandpa she screamed at him to wake up, but he stubbornly refused to come out of his dream state. Failing to wake the only responsible adult she decided to make her way to a telephone and call the cops. Lisa carefully avoided the rake Bart left as a trap and tip toed back over the micro-cars before running up the stairs as fast as she could. There was a phone in her parents' bedroom and she could use it to call for the police.

She turned back momentarily and saw Bob at the foot of the stairs, he'd stopped as he spied the rake and elegantly stepped aside from it.

"HA! I finally out witted the dreaded rake!" he said in triumph as he took a few steps forward quickly with determination, and immediately slipped up with the sound of many tiny wheeled vehicles rolling away, and landed on his back on the hard floor with a crash. Bob had failed to notice the micro-cars on the floor and with his freakishly large feet he was unable to avoid them anyway. Sideshow grumbled as he got up and brushed the rest of the infernal toys out of his way before he even attempted to climb the stairs.

Using this delay Lisa ran into her mom and dads room and picked up the phone to call the police, she expected the phone to be dead like in the horror movies, but there was the reassuring constant tone of a connection. She dialled 911 and asked for the police.

"You have reached the Springfield police department, we are unable to answer your call at the moment, please hold and you'll be connected to the switchboard. Remember your call is important to us, in the meantime here is a little music.

'Whatcha gonna do? Whatcha gonna do? Whatcha gonna do when they come for you? Bad Boys! Bad Boys! Whatcha gonna do? Whatcha gonna do?'

"You call is currently being held in a queue please hold, or you may prefer to call back later. Our call back number is 911"

She dropped the receiver as she heard Bob coming up the stairs. Lisa ran back to the top of the stairs and saw Bob was halfway up, but he was delayed when a rake swung up and smacked him in the face. She never noticed that as she came down stairs, but either way it bought her a little more time. But what could she do? Bob grumbled as he picked up the rake and snapped it in half over his knee before continuing his advance upstairs. In a moment of panic Lisa ran for the only place she even considered herself safe, her bedroom.

She ran in and slammed the door behind her, it had no lock so she picked up her chair by the desk and used it to jam the door knob so it wouldn't open like she's done some many times before. As soon as it was firmly wedged underneath she heard and felt a hammering on the door, the knob turned but refused to turn enough to allow entrance to Bob.

Lisa pressed herself against the door, she doubted if her small body and the effect of the chair combined would be enough to keep this murderous lunatic at bay but she was out of ideas. Her heart pounded in her chest as she heard Bob hammering on the door attempting to break it down.

What could she do? She was trapped in this small room with nothing but books and dolls and toys and… and… Dare she risk it, dare she? Another thud came on the door again louder this time, yes she dared! It was her only hope she reasoned. Without thinking too much about it she quickly ran over to her computer desk and pulled it away from the corner a little before getting into the space she made to further push it away from the wall.

The hammering became louder and the door started to bulge outward slightly she noticed as she frantically ripped up the carpet and pulled the loose floor board away revealing a pile of papers. She swiped them away with one brush of her hand and there it was, there it lay, the Mask.

It was staring up at her with those eyeless holes and that insufferable grin it had. She quickly snatched it up and held it out infront of her. No! She said to herself, no she mustn't do this.

There came another hammer at the door, maybe the hammering had alerted the neibours and they called the cops? She thought as she clutched the Mask to her chest. She couldn't hear the sound of sirens or anything like that. Another hammer and the door sagged in even more, it wouldn't hold for much longer. She couldn't wear the Mask again, shes only just gotten rid of that demon in her head, she didn't want to release it again. Another thud came at the door and her pathetic barricade started to giveway.

She turned away from the door, it was making her panic too much. What was she thinking? Panic too much? She had every right to panic right now! She looked down at the wooden mask in her hands and held it so it faced forwards towards her. Those mischievous eyes and that upturned smile as if it was happy to see her. She could use it, it was the correct time of the night so all she had to do was put it on and she could frighten Sideshow Bob away. She had a small amount of control if she used the Mask for a short duration all she had to do was get rid of him then remove it and no one would be the wiser.

A loud hammering came from the door again and the chair began slipping away. Bob was going to get through. Oh, screw it! She thought as she turned the Mask over so she faced the inside, was it still active? It wasn't glowing. She gulped at what might happen if it wasn't working but was soon rewarded with a bright green glow from the inside which seemed to make her feel serine and calm, as if it was an old friend welcoming her. Everything beyond her senses was blotted out as she began focusing completely on the Mask. Her hands began moving it towards her face, she felt through her finger tips as its wooden texture began to warp and reach out as it got closer and closer as if it was getting excited at being worn again, it was just about to make contact with her face when she found herself being lifted up off the ground rapidly and in the surprise she dropped it, she dropped the Mask!

She heard it clatter to the floor as she receded away from it higher into the air. She was too late, Sideshow Bob had broken into her bedroom and grabbed her right at the point before the transformation.

She struggld against his grip, if she could make him let her her go for just a second she could quickly grab the Mask and put it on, but she couldn't do anything as Bob dragged her out of her room and back down stairs. Lisa watched helpless as the Mask, what was probably her last hope disappear from sight.

* * *

She walked very jerkily out through a crack in her bedroom door where she saw Lisa being dragged away by a tall man with funny hair. Maggie sucked on her pacifier as she saw Lisa struggle against this mans grip, the man didn't look happy even though he looked very funny with a large pair of feet.

She walked towards the two of them, Lisa and the clown but Maggie fell over as she lost her balance. She'd been woken up by Lisa's screams as she ran up the stairs very fast, though she was upset at being woken up so abruptly she decided to see what all the fuss was about, by the look of it they had some sort of clown in the house. Lisa and the clown disappeared from sight and started descending the stairs very slowly and Maggie tried to walk towards them so they'd take her downstairs too.

But she stopped halfway when she realised they weren't going to help her come down stairs with them. She was disappointed and almost wanted to burst into tears so they'd know she was upstairs and wanted to come down, but something else grabbed her attention.

Creak! She heard the sound of a creaky door slowly swing open and noticed Lisa left her bedroom door open, which opened even wider as if by some force of its own. Curious she crawled towards it and entered. Maggie had been in this room not long ago a few days and she knew the place had changed. The large table with the big box and TV on it had been moved away from the wall and the floor looked like it had been curled up.

Maggie lost her footing and fell to the floor again. She resided herself to simply crawl towards the curled up floor when she noticed something sparkly out of the corner of her eye.

She made her way towards it, it looked like an upturned bowl of some sort, a green bowl which had been broke in half. As Maggie approached it she realised it had the features of a happy looking face. She smiled and clapped her hands, it reminded her of one of her toys she thought as she reached forward and picked it up wondering what it was for or if it went with anything. Maybe there was food inside it, she thought as she turned it over but was disappointed to find it completely empty, but was also surprised when she saw it was sparkling a pleasant green colour, sparkling like a Christmas tree.

Her mouth dropped open wide enough for her pacifier to fall out and she clapped her hands again and giggled in delight at unusual sight. She started to become completely mesmerised by these little twinkling lights inside it, like the night sky was somehow trapped inside it. She wanted to get closer to it, and she did, moving her head closer and closer and closer until...

BANG!

* * *

**To be continued...**

* * *

**Arthurs notes: **The lion with the teeth retainer in the beginning of this chapter is the same one Lisa fitted with the retainer while she was wearing the Mask.

Originally this chapter was going to have a bit where Lisa went to the voodoo shop where Homer bought the Mask, to confront the Old woman who sold it to him. But while writing it I felt it wasn't going anywhere so I cut it before I finished it.

Lisa's fascination with fantasy themed books is going to lead somewhere later on.

All reviews are welcome.


	13. A Series of Unfortunate Events

**Chapter 12**

**A Series of Unfortunate Events**

Bart struggled against his tight bonds but Bob had really tied these things tight, he just couldn't manage to slip his small hands through the holes and his wrists were starting to hurt from the rope binding them together. With his mouth un-gagged he'd tried calling out for help, for Grandpa but he wasn't coming, in fact Bart could still hear him snoring away like nothing was happening. Why did mom and dad even ask him to babysit them if all he does is fall asleep and let them run riot? What kind of irresponsible parents were they?

Bart heard some of his traps that were intended for Lisa being triggered, like the mirco-cars on the floor, he realised Bob must've triggered them since Lisa managed to get downstairs and into the living room no problem. Bart couldn't help but smile, though from his position he couldn't see it he could just imagine Sideshow Bob stepping on them and slipping over like the robbers in Home Alone did.

He tried to change tack and inched his way towards the phone next to the sofa, but with his hands tied behind his back he couldn't pick up the receiver or dial a number into the phone. He heard the sound of padded feet and Santa's Little Helper came into the room. Santa's Little Helper! He was a dog and dogs were supposed to defend their masters.

"Santa's Little Helper!" he cried to get the skinny dogs attention "Good boy, your best friend is in danger, find Sideshow Bob and bite him!" But the skinny dog just stood there for a moment, his eyes looking at Bart but gave the impression he wasn't paying attention. Barts hopes of the dog attacking Sideshow were shattered when the dog turned its head and he started chasing his own tail.

"Let go of me!" Lisa wailed as Bob appeared holding the struggling Lisa by the arms. At the sight of Bob fear gripped Barts heart again and he could feel it pounding in his chest as if it wanted to break out of his chest and run away. Bob tossed Lisa onto the sofa next to Bart and held her down with one hand.

"Now for the piece-de-resistance" he said intelligently as he pulled out the carving knife he had in his belt. "I'm going to kill you two without delay!"

"Don't we get a last request?" Bart said hopefully, maybe he could ask Bob to do something that would stall him, like one time he asked him to sing the whole score to the HMS Pinafore, which he did, allowing the cops to catch up to him.

"No" Bob just said abruptly "Whenever I give you a last request it's always something that stalls me. Well not this time." He raised the knife high into the air its polished metal surface caught the light showing how sharp it was.

"Our parents will be home any minute, Bob!" Lisa said quickly "You'll never get away!" Bob paused briefly.

"Oh come now, you don't think there's such a thing as the Springfield annual lawn competition?" Bob said as if this was obvious. "It was just a set up to get your parents out of the house, I never leave anything to chance." He raised the knife again.

"Wow Bob, umm…" Lisa said in a nervous squeak "…that's a really cleaver plan"

"Oh, don't try flattering me, it isn't going to work. This plan isn't my best but it's short, simple and to the **point**" The light reflected off the knife again reminding both of them of how sharp it was. "Now enough delays, I've been waiting a long time for this" Bob cocked his arm back ready to bring it down at any moment.

Bart didn't know which one of them the knife would enter first, he closed his eyes, his heart was thudding away and he was almost on the brink of crying as he waited for the sharp pain of the knife tearing into his body. He didn't want to die! He was only eleven! He always thought he'd die as a result of a driving accident while experimenting with drugs. There were so many things he wanted to do, like all those pranks he still has in his head... and he's never read... a book.

Rattle, rattle, rattle, rattle. Went something on the edge of his hearing, it sounded like the receiver on the telephone, though why it was rattling he didn't know or care. Nor did he care that the room was also starting to get colder and colder as a light breeze started to push through it.

BANG! Went something upstairs and the entire room actually felt like an earthquake had hit. The reading lamps, the pictures on the walls all fell to the floor, even Bob with his freakishly large feet lost his balance and fell to the floor, the knife in his hand just missing Bart by inches as it swerved past him, fell out of Bobs hand and landed a little ways away from him. A gust blew through the entire house and the floor suddenly bucked as if something heavy had just slammed into it from a height. Santa's Little Helper ran as fast as he could out of the room, spooked by something Bart couldn't yet sense.

First came a familiar noise, a whiling sound of something spinning incredibly fast followed by the noise of a slight thunder clap. Then came a very familiar sight as a tornado, a small one which was a whirl of colour came into the room. It wasn't very big, say the size of a small chair but the amount of wind it created it could've been a real tornado. He knew instantly what that whirl was, what was causing it at least, but who was wearing it?

Bob sat up while and watched the unusual looking twister as it began to come to a stop. He scooped up his knife in his hand as a figure emerged. _Who is this?_ Bart thought, it looked like a midget of some sort. A midget with a big, green, balled head, no ears, what anyone wearing the Mask seemed to turned into, only these features were on a body which looked no bigger than a baby who was wearing blue baby clothes. It grinned and grinned rather evilly showing it had no teeth, only gums. No wait it had one tooth in the roof of its jaw, but it was a large, pointed, sharp looking tooth.

Whoever it was under the Mask it started chuckling to itself.

"HEEEHHEEEHAAA, GA, GA, GOO, GOO! " it's voice was eerily unearthly as it smiled. From out of nowhere it pulled a red pacifier out which it stuck in its mouth and sucked on. Then Bart knew exactly who this was now, it was Maggie, Maggie had found and put on the Mask! This however didn't make Bart feel any better because they were still locked in the house with one mad man and now with a mad baby with super powers, and at her age she couldn't appreciate the sheer prank making potential of the Mask.

"What the hell is this?" Bob said waving his knife at it as if it was a savage beast ready to rip his heart out.

Maggie's red eyes looked up first at Bob, then at the sharp sheet of metal in Bobs hand. It didn't seem to hesitate as it spat out its pacifier, opened its mouth and clamped its razor sharp tooth down onto the metal knife and somehow managed to puncture it clean through leaving a hole in the metal. She then somehow managed to raise herself upwards and force her tooth into the hilt of the knife, missing Bobs hand by less than an inch. It released its grip again moved further up Bob's arm and bit straight down into him.

All this happened so fast Bob couldn't react, his hand opened and dropped the knife and then he screamed in pain. He first tried to push Maggie off with his free hand, but when he found that wasn't working he began shaking his arm rapidly trying to force the masked baby Simpson to let go, but she wasn't letting go so easily.

In this moment of confusion while Bob was distracted Lisa had leapt off the sofa, scooped up the dropped knife with a hole in it, came back and was trying to cut Bart's bonds which bound his arms together.

"I thought you said you threw the Mask away!" Bart said to her as she got to work on the bonds, she didn't reply to his question though, she just worked on his bound hands. Bart turned back to watch the fight folding out. Bob cocked his hand back and brought it forward rapidly in an attempt to dislodge Maggie, he repeated this when she still refused to let him go. On the fourth try however she lost her grip and was fired across the room and into the lounge area and vanished from sight. Bob held his arm in pain but despite Maggie biting down with a razor sharp tooth she hadn't even drawn any blood from him, yet there appeared to be a puncture mark which had clotted leaving a large bruise in the shape of her gums. Lisa was still working on Barts bonds as Bob turned back towards them.

"What's taking so long?" Bart almost shouted at her

"This knifes not good at cutting ropes, Bart" Lisa said back panic clear in her voice "I think it's purpose was to penetrate not cut." Bob was beginning to approach them again.

"Umm Lisa!"

Lisa stopped working on Bart's bound hands and saw the advancing would-be-murderer. She flashed the knife at him trying to get him to stay back. Bob did take a few steps back but did not look concerned as he reached into his belt and again pulled out another, much larger knife this time. As they both stared almost transfixed by this new, larger shiny knife Bart heard Lisa mutter a low squeal of fear.

"Oh don't look so shocked" Bob said as he slid his finger down the edge to make sure it was still sharp "What kind of maniac murderer would I be if I only had one of these thiiIIINNNGSS?"

CRUNCH! Bob yelped in pain again, and dropped his larger knife and began hopping on his right foot while holding his left in his hands tightly as if someone had just stood on it.

Standing next to Bob's feet was none other than the masked Maggie herself, a mischievous grin on her face and her hands behind her back in an attempt to hide, and very poorly hide a large wooden mallet. She shrugged as if to say 'it wasn't me' before bringing the mallet around and slamming it down on Bobs other foot, CRUNCH and the tall Sideshow clown yelled in pain again and toppled over onto his back holding his other aching foot in his hands. Bob screamed and cursed loudly, several of these words Bart had never heard before, but now he was sure to use them.

Bobs curses and screams were quickly silenced as Maggie picked up the red pacifier she spat out onto the floor a moment ago and shoved it into Bobs mouth who actually sucked it once or twice before spitting it back out. He still held his aching feet and rolled over from side to side. Maggie must've really gone to town when she crushed his feet. Now with Bob distracted again Lisa returned to working on Barts bonds.

"HMMM, YUM, YUM!" words which came from Maggie, her eyes were wide as if she had spotted something and in a flash she was at the door leading to the kitchen and was eyeing the mud from Bart's failed bucket-over-the-door gag when he dropped the bucket.

Maggie licked her lips as she pulled out of nowhere a large ice cream cone and scooped up all the brown mud in one go and began licking it as if it was ice cream. _She... didn't really thing that was ice cream did she?..._ Bart thought as Maggie's tongue, which was made longer and larger than usual by the effects of the Mask, licked the mud out of the ice cream cone in one go and swallow it with one gulp. She then tossed the cone into the air and it landed in her waiting mouth which she swallowed in one go as well.

This was way too weird, they'd have to get that thing off Maggie before their parents came back and saw this. Bart knew if mom and dad found out about the Mask they would take it off him and he'd never see it again.

"What the hell is that thing?" Bob was in so much pain tears were actually starting to form around his eyes. He reached out for his dropped knife but before he could grab it Maggie was all over him again, she grabbed his long locks of hair and she pulled if by the hair off the floor, swung him over her head and bashed him into the floor before raising him up again and smashing him again back into the floor.

Bart felt his hands come free at last and they both turned to Maggie who was keeping Sideshow Bob occupied but now neither of them could get close to her because she was now swinging Bob over her head in fast circles by his hair, so fast he was almost a blur of motion and all the time Bob was screaming. She then let go and the Sideshow was fired off into one direction through the living room and was out of sight. His screams of protest were immediately followed by a loud muffled crashing sound which seemed to go on for some time as if multiple items were falling over, and Bart hoped it all landed on top of Bobs head.

* * *

Maggies view on the world was flipped on its head, she didn't know what had happened to her in the last few seconds but where she had felt tired and sleepy she now felt awake and energetic. She joined in on the fun with the clown man downstairs though he did look like a very mad clown, he had the hair and the feet but not the makeup or the colourful clothes, he was completely dressed in black. Either way she enjoyed playing games with the clown but now it looked like he'd gone home.

Her tooth had stopped aching but now it felt long and pointy, though she didn't question this odd change she liked not having aching gums anymore but now she was hungry. Her stomach growled and ached, that mud flavoured ice cream was a nice treat but she was still hungry, she needed something else.

Her brother and sister, the two small giants called Bart and Lisa were both looking at her, she didn't know why but they were but they were. It was the sort of look mummy would give Homer when he hid a packet of peas under his backside to cool himself down on a hot day.

"You told me you threw the Mask away, you lying..." Bart had started to say but Lisa interrupted him.

"Bart, that thing is dangerous. Do you remember what happened to me when I wore it?" Lisa was shouting at her brother, Maggie hated shouting, it hurt her ears. "You think I wanted to do those things, do you think I wanted to be like that?"

"I would" Bart shrugged as he tried to untie some sort of wire wrapped around his ankles. Maggie began to wonder what sort of game they were playing now.

"Well I don't!" Lisa shouted back

"It's not your mask!" Bart tried to shout back with even more force. Maggie was really starting to hate this and she felt so hungry. Wait, over there, through the doorway in the kitchen, there stood a tall green box which was somehow magically cold on the inside. Inside that green box was food, and Maggie liked food.

* * *

Lisa was about to give Bart a long lecture on how dangerous the Mask was when she felt something move past her very fast, so fast that it nearly knocked her off her feet.

"Hehehehaa, YUM, YUM, FOOOOOD!" said the unearthly deep voice Maggie was somehow managing to produce. Lisa left Bart to fiddle with the tight knot Bob tied his ankle bonds in.

"Hey, come back here!" Bart shouted at Lisa, but she wasn't listening, while Bart was distracted by the knot and currently immobile she could retrieve the Mask and hide it back in its hiding place before he gained enough brain cells to realise that the knife left on the floor can be used to cut things.

Maggie didn't go far she was only in the kitchen but knowing how the Mask worked Lisa doubted if she would be sitting down peacefully to go to sleep, and she was right.

Maggie was standing in front of the fridge and managed to fling open the door. She then took out a large tray of food and tilted the far end upwards towards her face. Everything on that tray, the half eaten chicken, the box of donuts, the buzz cola, milk, a six pack of duff all started sliding towards her mouth, which rapidly expanded to the size of a trashcan lid and swallowed everything whole, and Lisa meant everything, not just the cola the duff and the donuts but the boxes and cans they were inside. She gulped them all down in one before she started on the next tray in the fridge and swallowed what was on that as well.

"Hey Maggie!" Lisa said softly to the balled, green headed baby "It's me, Lisa your sister" she hoped Maggie would at least remember her. A babies mind wasn't as developed as an adult mind or even her own, but she should remember her at least, out of her and Bart she'd spent the most time with her. As she watched Maggie it looked to Lisa like the Mask was trying to make do with what it could get from a mind which hadn't developed a proper personality yet, and since a babies basic instincts were to simply eat, sleep and defecate Lisa didn't want Maggie to have the Mask too long so she had to deal with the latter.

"Come here Maggie" she said in a light voice "Give Lisa the Mask" but Maggie didn't seem to understand what Lisa wanted, did Maggie even know what a mask was? Cautiously Lisa slowly approached and Maggie just continued to look at her curiously. Then the masked baby belched, she belched a belch so big that it felt like she produced winds of a category five hurricane. Lisa skidded backwards a few feet and came to a stop, thankfully the belch was short lived but she could feel that her hair was completely blown back now. Getting the Mask back was going to be more difficult then she first anticipated.

Stamp, stamp, stamp! Lisa was then pushed to the ground and by none other than Bart Simpson. He'd abandoned trying to untie his bonds and instead discovered he could just hop around.

"Lisa, Lisa, Lisa" said Bart patronisingly as if he knew how to handle the situation "You gotta learn how to talk to babies" he said, then he quickly reached forward to grab Maggie "Give me my Mask back!"

A sound came from Maggies stomach, a worrying sort of ache Lisa didn't like the sound of. Maggie didn't look well either, almost as if... Lisa knew what was about to happen. She stayed down and covered her head in her hands as Maggie threw up, and as she guessed it wasn't going to be an ordinary case of throwing up. Maggie sprayed orange vomit from her mouth like water from a fire hose, all that force was aimed directly at Bart who was blown off his tied up feet and flew backwards straight back into the TV area.

The vomiting went on for a few more seconds before Maggie turned the water works off. All that vomit she managed to produce had gotten everywhere in the room, all over the walls, the floor, the ceiling, everywhere and it was really starting to make the place stink. The smell was so horrific that Lisa wasn't even going to try to describe it to herself and in the vomit were all the items Maggie had just ate, all in various phases of digestion.

Maggie wiped her mouth and belched lightly this time, then she stretched her short arms and yawned, she looked like she was getting tired at least and as a baby she was supposed to sleep often. Lisa guessed but she was then taken by surprise when Maggie leapt at her like she was going to strangle her. Lisa screamed, but Maggie just landed in her arms and allowed the older sister to hold her younger sibling like any ordinary baby. What did Maggie want of her? She thought as the balled headed baby wrapped her arms around her neck to stop herself falling. Lisa instinctively closed her arms and held the masked baby.

Maggie then pointed at the fridge on which the A-B-C magnets had been arranged to say –HOMER, DON'T EAT THE PIE IN THE FRIDGE, ITS FOR THE CHURCH PICNIC THIS WEEKEND- under those words the letters had been arranged, slightly childishly misaligned to say –OKAY- then followed by another collection of both letters and numbers which were substituted for letter –MARGE, I'VE GOT SOME GOOD NEWS AND BAD NEWS, THE GOOD NEWS IS YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT THE CHURCH PICNIC, THE BAD NEWS IS 1'VE RAN OUT 0F LETT3RS T0 TELL YOU THE B4D N3WS-

Maggies hands then reached out and stretched like they were made of rubber towards the magnets and rapidly rearranged them so they read –HEY! TO MY BEDROOM PAL, AND STEP ON IT!- Maggie yawned again and rested her big green head on Lisa's shoulders and began snoozing.

At first Lisa was slightly perplexed that Maggie even knew how to spell those words at her age, never mind arrange them so they spelt out a whole sentence, but the Mask which seemed to make anything possible. So she shrugged and began carrying the dozing Maggie through the dining area, past Grandpa who was still sleeping peacefully, avoided those stupid traps Bart set up and started climbing the stairs.

The house was a complete mess now, there was vomit all over the place and there was no way they could clean that up before mom and dad got back and even if they did they could never mask the smell in a million years, the place was rancid. What was she going to tell them? Not the truth, they wouldn't believe Maggie did this with a magic Mask, she wouldn't say that anyway because she still wanted to keep this Mask a secret from the world. She'd have to lie, but what could she possibly make up that would account for that mess? They could blame Sideshow Bob of course but...

Wait, where did Sideshow Bob go anyway?

* * *

Bob came to in a dark place, his head felt he'd gone twelve rounds with Drederick Tatum and his feet felt like a ton of bricks had landed on top of them. Where on earth was he now? He reached up towards his aching head where he could feel thousands of lumps forming all over, all of which were disguised by his large hair style. These lumps had been formed from thousands of objects which apparently appeared to have fallen on his head, but where was he?

He decided he was in some sort of daze because his head felt like it was swimming. He could see a small amount of light coming through a short, wide window high above him. Through it he could see the moon and what looked like the fence of next doors house. By the angle he guessed he was back in the basement again, how he got back down in here he had no clue.

As he stood he realized his daze wasn't going to get any better, he hadn't recovered from his encounter with that green faced baby, what time was it? While in his daze and despite his better judgment he stepped on the prongs of a waiting rake which swung up to greet him, _I really hated rakes_ he managed to think to himself as the impacted knocked him out cold again.

* * *

Lisa laid Maggie gently in her crib, she was being surprisingly cooperative Lisa thought, usually as far as she was aware when anyone wore that infernal thing they became unpredictable and irritable but Maggie was now just being cooperative. Lisa put it down to her being a baby and her mind hadn't developed sufficiently for the Mask to make her anything but a sleepy baby with magic powers. Lisa smoothed out Maggies covers over her and gently began to sing a lullaby to help her sleep.

"Hush little baby, don't say a word, mama's gonna buy you a mocking bird…" Maggie yawned again at Lisa's gentle singing voice and Lisa could tell Maggie was gradually beginning to drift to sleep again. Soft music was soothing the monsters temper, Lisa guessed. For good measure Lisa picked up one of Maggies red pacifiers from a table and placed it in her mouth, this seemed to help as the masked Maggie closed her sleepy eyes. Lisa stroked at Maggies face -or the Mask depending on your point of view- gently trying to help her drift into a deeper sleep before she did what needed to be done.

When Lisa was convinced Maggie was fast asleep, or as asleep as she was going to get she gently and slowly reached behind Maggies head and felt the fold were the two halves of the Mask joined together. She gently pushed her fingers into the gap and started to gently force the two halves of it apart. She began pulling it away off her face, it was coming at first but it then started to pull on Maggies face as if it was fighting to remain attached. This caused what Lisa hoped wouldn't happen. Maggies eyes swung open and they looked at Lisa with annoyance, growing annoyance.

"Sorry about this Maggie" Lisa said as she put her left foot up against the crib, laid her left hand on Maggies shoulder and pulled on the Mask with her right hand with all her might. As she pulled and the Mask stretched out to the length of both her arms, she felt in her hand that the Mask was becoming more and more solid as she pulled it away from Maggies face then it broke its connection with Maggie and all the green rubbery substance flew into Lisa's right hand and turned back into the inert wooden state again.

_WHOO HOOOO!_ She cried in her mind, she got the Mask back now all she had to do was hide it before Bart caught up with her. But her victory was cut short as Maggie who was now wide away and was bursting into tears. Lisa now felt slightly guilty at taking the thing from her, but taking it wasn't like taking candy from a baby, especially if the baby has the powers of a god, but she didn't want to upset her younger sister.

"Don't cry! I'm sorry Maggie" Lisa said trying to sooth her temper "but you couldn't go to bed with a great big dirty mask on" the youngest Simpson wasn't buying it and continued to whale and cry. Lisa couldn't let Maggie have the Mask back she's just as dangerous as anyone is with it, possibly more since she isn't at the age where you learn about right from wrong. "Maggie, you can't have the Mask back" she insisted but she wouldn't stop crying.

"SHHH, SHH, SHH!" she kept shushing. She tried presenting the young Simpson with some of her stuffed toys, but Maggie just continued to cry. Lisa then tried showing Maggie her bottle, but again she didn't care and kept crying. What was wrong with her? What else did she want?

Lisa held pressed her hands to her temples as she tried to think. The Mask was clutched in her right hand but she had it in a position where it could attach itself to her face. But then Lisa noticed something about it. Through the mouth piece was a big red bulb of plastic. She turned the Mask over so she was looking at its face. When Lisa pulled the Mask off it also pulled Maggies pacifier out, and was now jammed in the mouth of the Mask. Lisa took the plug of the pacifier and pulled until the rubber bulb came free. She then placed the red pacifier in her sisters mouth and she stopped crying immediately as she blissfully sucked on it.

Maggie yawned again and stretched her arms before falling back against her pillow, falling back into a blissful sleep again. She hadn't been crying for the Mask, she was crying for her pacifier.

Sighing Lisa walked out of Maggies room and closed the door. Her attention then returned to the Mask in her hands, this mischievous thing causes nothing but trouble, why had she put off trying to destroy this thing when she had the chance? Why? She didn't really know. Well now she wasn't going to wait any longer, she was going to take this thing down to the garage and use her dad's power tools to rip this thing to pieces.

_Ugn! what is that smell?_ Lisa thought. A very rancid sickening scent began assaulting her nasal cavities. Then something reached out and grabbed at the Mask in her hands and tried to pull it away from her. It was Bart, he held the Mask tightly in his grip. Her spiky haired brother was covered in an orange goop which Lisa guessed was Maggies vomit from earlier. He'd also cut his legs free from the bounds, it seemed he'd finally worked out knifes were good at cutting stuff.

Bart pulled on the wooden mask but Lisa wasn't going to let go that easily, Lisa tried to pull it away from him but Bart wouldn't let go of the Mask either. She couldn't risk Bart wearing it again, even he was a nightmare wearing it but he just wouldn't let go and she knew she wouldn't be able to reason with him. Lisa's fingers curled up so they went through an eye hole giving her greater grip on it.

* * *

Bart gave one giant heave and they both fell to the floor in a pile still fighting over the piece of wood. They rolled over each other down the hallway as one tried in vain to remove the Mask from the others grasp. Bart had caught on to how Lisa was holding onto the Mask and had slipped one of his fingers through the other eye hole to give him greater grip. They were now back on their feet still fighting over it.

"Bart" Lisa screamed at him "You can't wear it, it's dangerous!" she insisted.

"That's why I want to wear it!" he insisted right back.

Lisa's grip suddenly faltered, Bart took advantage and managed to rip the Mask from her fingers. He held it over his head in triumph but the momentum he used to pull it from her also made him lose his balance. He took a few steps back to try to compensate but stopped immediately when he came to the very edge of the stairs. He didn't want to repeat the accident the last time something like this happened, he quickly reached out and grabbed the banister, but lost his grip on the Mask at the same time which fell down the stairs with soft wooden impacts until it clattered to the floor.

With Bart stuck halfway from falling down the stairs again Lisa took the opportunity to race past him down the stairs after the magic artifact. But Bart used his free hand to grab the back of her dress stopping her descent. She waved her arms in protest trying to make him let her go, but Bart wasn't going to let her get to that mask first, it was his not hers why couldn't she just go away and play with her own dorky toys?

The Mask lay in the middle of the room and Bart saw the inside light up with a green glow ready for the next person to place it on their face.

Pitter patter, pitter patter, what was that noise? Bart thought to himself as he struggled to hold Lisa in his grasp. His dog Santa's Little Helper came into the hallway, he sat down and watched Bart and Lisa curiously for a moment, its tongue hanging out of its mouth panting.

"Santa's Little Helper! Good boy!" Bart shouted "Get that Mask and take it as far away from Lisa as possible!" Bart commanded of his dog. But the dog looked like he didn't understand any of Barts words. Instead he started using his back legs to scratch behind his ear.

Lisa was starting to break free of his grip. "No boy! Get the Mask, get it!" Bart insisted of his dog, but the dog just looked dumbly at him and began walking off in the direction of the Mask but probably only by coincidence. When he spotted it he just looked at the wooden object before moving his head closer to sniff at it.

"Santa's Little Helper, no!" Lisa screamed, but too late. As soon as the dogs snout touched the inside of the Mask the edges shot out and wrapped around his face. With a bright green flash a strange whirl wind surrounded the dog blurring him out completely.

The bright green flash made Bart's grip falter and Lisa managed to break free of his grip, she ran down the stairs as the dog continued its transformation. Bart righted himself and was just on Lisa's heels when she arrived at the foot of the stairs. Bart was almost temporarily blinded by another bright flash and a thunder clap. He could see the skeleton of his best friend light up briefly as the swirls of green and brown continued to engulf him.

The whirling winds began to die down as Santa's Little Helper finished his transformation. When everything came to a stop the creature which stood before them was not Santa's Little Helper anymore. The creature had the skinny body of Santa's Little Helper but only that. Its head was twice as large as before and it was green with large sharp teeth in its mouth, his eyes were also red and looked mean and vicious. Both Bart and Lisa stood back from the monster dog as it growled menacingly at them both and lowered itself as if it was ready to pounce and rip them both apart.

"It's okay boy" Bart said his voice slightly trembling with fear "You remember me don't you? Bart Simpson, you're best friend"

With one giant leap the dog jumped into the air and landed on top of them both, they both fell on their backs as the dogs front paws pinned them to the ground. They both struggled to break free of this monster dog as it opened its massive mouth and both of them caught the strong whiff of dog breath, _Santa's Little Helper wasn't going to eat him was he? Not after all they'd been through!_ Saliva dripped from its long white teeth as a long tongue curled out of its mouth and licked them both, then licked them again this time more affectionately, and again.

"Good boy, Santa's Little Helper" Bart chuckled in relief, he wasn't going to eat them after all, he was just like his owner, a great big kidder "Now give me that mask" Bart said as he reached up around the back of his head, looking for the fold he needed to use to remove the Mask from his dog.

* * *

Lisa had to do something quick before Bart removed the Mask from Santa's Little Helper, if he did then she wasn't in a good enough position to stop him. Better for a dog to have the Mask then Bart she reasoned. But what could she do pinned to the ground like this? She trued pushing the dogs paws off her chest but despite not being heavy they wouldn't move.

"Hey, Santa's Little Helper" she said as the dog turned to look at her, then a flash of inspiration waved into her head "WALKIES!" she cried.

At the sound of that word the dogs mouth upturned in a grin, its ears perked up and its tail wagged with excitement. Before Bart could find the fold at the back of its head the dog dashed off, unpinning them both and ran out of Barts reach as it started looking for the lead to its leash. Lisa saw it leap through the TV room and into the kitchen where they lost sight of him. There followed a loud screeching sound like it was skidding across the floor. Then a loud crash came, a crash which Lisa guessed couldn't be anything good.

Bart got up first and ran towards the kitchen Lisa followed only a few steps behind. They both entered the kitchen and found it completely deserted, no damage, no mess, nothing. Though there was Maggies vomit running up the wall and dripping from the ceiling which gave the room the look of something from a horror story. But where was Santa's Little Helper?

"Hey kids" Huh? That was dads voice!

"HOMER!" Bart yelped in surprise and they both spun around to face him "What… what… what are you doing back so early?" he asked.

"Yeah, I thought you went out with mom" Lisa added as Homer brushed past them, he looked exhausted as he panted for breath. Lisa was on the brink of panic, Homer couldn't find out about the Mask and if he saw the mess in the kitchen he was sure to think something would be up.

"The car... broke down…" he panted "walked... for a mile... your moms back there… with the car… and my cell phone… batteries dead" Homer said as he picked up the phone and dialled a number "Must… dial… for… break down… services… must… reach… party… must… get… award" Lisa decided against pointing out that Sideshow Bob tricked him to get them both out of the house so he could try to kill both Bart and herself. If she did her chances of quietly dealing with the Mask would drop to zero. But that's not what Lisa was most nervous about she knew at any moment Homer would either notice the mess in the kitchen or find Santa's Little Helper in the Mask any minute now. Yet as Homer dialled the numbers and waited while it was ringing he looked around the kitchen for a second taking in the devastation and vomit and then looked down at Bart who was covered in the orange goop, then over at Lisa who had some of the goop down her front from their fight over the Mask. Then Homer… just shrugged and went back to his phone call. Huh? Lisa knew Homer wasn't very observant but this was ridicules. Or maybe and more likely he just didn't care.

Bart was keeping his mouth shut as well, of course he didn't want Homer catching on to what was happening either, but for the wrong reasons because she knew where she wanted to destroy it, Bart wanted to wear it.

Where was Santa's Little Helper? Lisa wondered, it sounded like he skidded across the floor and crashed into something. So where was he and where was all the damage? She then noticed something she'd missed the first time, the vomit on the floor looked like it had been parted as Santa's Little Helper Skidded across it, it was a trail which lead directly to the fridge… the fridge that the last time Lisa looked had been open, but now stood with its door tightly closed with some traces of food oozing from its door. Smack, Lisa was so concentrated she hadn't even heard Homer's conversation and he'd just put the phone down.

"Well, that's the end of that chapter" he said dusting his hands together for a job well done, "Think I'll have a beer before I go back to Marge"

"No Dad!" Lisa said quickly, if Homer opened the fridge he'd find the masked dog, she had to think fast "You're not allowed to drink and drive!" she insisted

"Awww, sweetie" Homer said as he approached the fridge "How do you think I get home from Moes every night?"

He opened the fridge and they were all met with a sight of complete destruction. The entire fridge had been destroyed, milk bottles were smashed, beer cans ripped open, everything was splattered up against the wall and mixed up, and currently feasting on a raw stake, trying to rip it apart was the big green head of Santa's Little Helper. It somehow managed to grin mischievously and wag its eye brows at them.

"AHHH! IT'S SLIMER!" Homer screamed, mistaking the green masked dog for the green ghost. He slammed the fridge door closed on it and pressed his shoulder against the door as if the thing was trying to break out. When the masked dog wasn't putting up any sort of fight Homer quickly left the fridge and walked quickly past Bart and Lisa "You two keep him locked in the fridge" he said as he went into the TV area and picked up the phone "I'm gonna call the Ghostbusters"

Lisa and Bart's rivalry for the Mask fast returned as they both fought each other to get to the door first. During their brief struggle Bart managed to get there first however and he slowly managed to open the door. They were greeted by a very bright white light from inside the fridge itself, smoke seemed to pour out of it like it was filled with dry ice or a smoke machine, it also looked like the entire fridge's interior had opened out into an impossibly large space with a triangular pyramidal structure in the distance surrounded by cream coloured clouds. Santa's Little Helpers big green head suddenly appeared in front of them, it had adopted the shape of a demon like dog with pointy horns and a big snout, the dog opened his mouth wide and a bright light shone from deep down his throat and from the dogs gullet came one drawn out word "ZZZZUUUUUUUUUUUUULLL!"

Lisa felt the colour drain from her face and become incredibly pale and Bart didn't look too well either. They both slammed the door on the dog and placed their backs against it. Did they just see that? Lisa thought but she didn't get a chance to think on this more when a great deal of pressure was pushed onto the door and it started to collapse as the dog put its full weight behind it. The door broke away from the fridge and landed on both Bart and Lisa nearly squashed them. Lisa could just see the dog leap onto the table and leap off that onto a counter and managed to use its mouth to open a window and leap through it, outside into the back yard.

They both struggled to get the quite heavy fridge door off them, but unfortunately Bart managed to get out from under the door first and continued to pursue his dog while Lisa struggled to get the now full weight of the door off her.

* * *

In the hall Homer seemed to be having trouble as he talked to someone on the phone.

"What do you mean I've dialled the wrong number?" Homer said into the phone, he turned to the TV in which he put in a DVD of Ghostbusters and paused the picture when their commercial was shown with their number on it "I dialled the number in the movie!"

"Sir" said a very geeky sounding voice at the end of the line "that was just a movie, Ghostbusters was a movie, it isn't real"

"Then who saved the world from Gozer?" Homer challenged him

"Nobody!" came the frustrated voice from the other connection, and Homer began to use his weird logic to come to a conclusion.

"Then… that means there is still a giant Marshmallow man roaming New York?" he said excitedly and before the person he was talking to could reply Homer held up his arms and screamed "WHOOOO HOOO! The Simpson's are going to New York… again!"

Bart started to sneak past him on his tip toes, half listening to that conversation.

"Ummmm, giant Stay Puft Marshmallow man, Aggguhhhhh" he was drooling

Bart gently turned the knob on the back door and slipped outside into the back yard where he immediately saw Santa's Little Helper, but what he was doing was anything but ordinary. The dog had lifting his left rear leg up and an arc of water streamed from the dog onto a tree, a tree in Flanders back yard. Bart laughed at the odd sight, the dog was rubbing off on the master.

"Good boy" he said holding out his arms to hug his dog which the masked dog allowed him to wagging his tail so fast it could probably knock someone out with a single swipe. While hugging his dog Bart then reached behind Santa's Little Helpers head and found the fold where the two halves of the Mask joined together. Digging his fingers in he pulled hard and fast and the Mask came away surprisingly quickly into his hands.

"Got it!" he yelled in triumph holding it into the air as the dog, now back to normal began licking his face, Bart giggled as he tried to stop his dog "Hey, quit it"

But then the Mask was almost wrenched from his grasp as someone else grabbed it. That someone was Lisa again, why couldn't she just go away?

* * *

Lisa pulled on the Mask trying to break Barts grip on it, but Bart pulled it back towards himself trying to break her grip, they were back right where they started five minutes ago.

Bart took a step forward to try to push her away and pull it from her fingers at the same time, but she took a step back to avoid this, which she immediately realized was a mistake. She stepped into what felt like damp mud which her plastic sandals couldn't find any grip on. She began to fall back and the foot she used to step back slipped forwards and kicked upwards and hit Bart in the face. Bart released his grip on the Mask but Lisa also lost her grip on the infernal thing as well and her rising foot also unintentionally kicked it from her hands.

She landed on her back and hit her head on something and she shut her eyes tightly as a spike of pain ran through her brain. She opened her eyes expecting to see stars of some sort circling her head. She shut her eyes again and tried to come to her senses quickly, she had to get the Mask quickly before Bart retrieved it. But as she opened her eyes again and still in a slight daze she could see it, it was right in front of her, in the air, coming down towards her._ No_ a voice in her head said as gravity brought the thing closer towards her _no!_ the voice said again. "No!" she said out loud rather weakly as the rest of her mind began to catch up on what her brain and eyes were already screaming at her "NO" her eyes grew wide as she finally registered, in its current position it was going to land upright on her face. She couldn't act fast enough as the green wooden Mask glowed a bright shade of green right before… "NOOO MURPHHhmmm!" she mumbled as it slammed onto her face.

She tried to reach up to rip it off herself before it changed her again, back into that thing she became last time. She didn't want to wear the Mask again anymore, they'd already got rid of Sideshow Bob there was no point. But it stubbornly refused to cease and desist trying to wrap around her head. Worse still she realized she couldn't move her arms to remove it nor her legs for that matter, she felt as if a thousand volts was running through every nerve ending and motor neuron in her body. Her limbs jerked but refused to do any sort of useful movement whatsoever as she felt the Mask's shape continue to warp and wrap around her head.

_NOOOooo!_ Her mind screamed as the Mask took her over.

* * *

Bart rubbed his chin where Lisa's foot hit his head. It didn't hurt so much but it did cause him to fall back and let go of the Mask. As soon as he came to his senses however he was alert and looking for where it was, "No" she heard Lisa mutter followed by her screaming "NO!" He turned to see what she was screaming at. Was Sideshow Bob coming at them again? His sight was suddenly swamped back a bright flash of light coming from Lisa. She was laying on her back her arms and legs stretched out trembling violently as if she was having some sort of a fit and couldn't control her limbs.

Bart then noticed the Mask was on her face and was starting to wrap around her head, as it did so it began to become a brighter shade of green and its craggy wooden surface began to become smooth and rubbery.

Bart tried to stop the transformation, all he had to do was race forward and grab the Mask and rip it off his sisters face. But he was thrown back by a great flash of light and a blast of pressure like his sister had suddenly exploded. He landed on his back in the soil and saw Lisa rapidly become a whirl of green, yellow and red as she rotated on her heels incredibly fast.

As he watched he noticed Santa's Little Helper yelp like a coward and run as fast as his paws could carry him into his dog house and watched the transformation from the safest place in the back yard. He was visibly scared Bart could tell because he reached up with his paws and pushed them in front of his own eyes so he didn't have to watch what was occurring.

Lisa's skeleton lit up from the inside for a brief second with a loud thunder clap and from the whirling noise Bart could make out the screams of protest coming from his sister, almost as if she didn't really want to wear the Mask at all.

Within seconds sister twister came to a complete stop and he saw the form of a little girl wearing a green rubber mask, she was the same height as Lisa, with a similar hair style only the points were curled away from her face and looked more like shark fins, her irises were a visible shade of crimson and her teeth were slightly larger than usual. Her dress was similar to Lisa's but was a creepy shade of blood red. She looked at Bart both darkly and mischievously. This girl wasn't Lisa Simpson anymore it's what the Mask made of her before and it's what it made of her now.

She placed her hand on her hips and her face slowly twisted to become more dark and mischievous as she looked at him, she then spoke in a voice which was slightly high pitched and unearthly and as she spoke her face became even more dark and mischievous and her voice more high pitched and unearthly.

"Hi there!" she grinned at him "REMEMBER MEEEEEEE?"

* * *

**To be continued...**

* * *

**Authors notes:** Maggie was surprisingly a very difficult character to write as the Mask, she doesn't really have much I could work with so I've done my best and based her off what the baby in the Mask cartoon series acted when he got hold of the Mask.

While writing this chapter I thought it was just a little too short so I let Santa's Little Helper have a quick turn with the Mask as well.

All reviews are welcome.


	14. Just another part of Me

Updated: 12\01\2011

**Authors notes:** I've rewritten parts of this chapter because I was a little unhappy with how I wrote Lisa/Mask. Reading it through again I just felt it was straying a little from the original concept of the character. Possibly I mixed up some of the Mask elements I wrote into a chapter of my M rated story 'Temporary Insanity'. But I've re-written some of this chapter to bring the character back into line with my original concept.

Also, I felt unhappy that some of the violent elements were still stretching the current T rating so I've substituted some of the more gruesome horror elements in this chapter just in case I was forced to take the story down because of them.

Because of the cuts I've added extra stuff where the original chapter left off to keep it at the standard chapter length.

-Enjoy

* * *

**Chapter 13**

**Just another part of Me.**

_Uh oh!_ Bart thought and gulped, a shiver went up his spine as he stood rooted to the spot. Lisa was wearing the Mask again and had that vengeful look, that crazed gleam in her crimson eyes she seemed to have while in this form.

He admitted he had been mad at Lisa, mad for stealing his mask, mad for keeping it from him. But that anger was giving way to something else. Fear.

As soon as he looked into those mad twisted eyes Bart suddenly remembered what Lisa was like the night she last wore the Mask. She'd set tigers on him and nearly had him killed. Lisa, he thought would never truly want to kill him, maybe humiliate or hurt him, but never kill. Now though, looking into those crazy eyes he didn't know if 'this' Lisa was anything but merciful.

"I'm gone!" Bart said as he turned and tried to run away from his masked sister but before he could make it two feet he felt a hand quickly grab him by the front of his shirt and pull him back to face her.

"Hold it!" came Lisa's slightly distorted voice as she pulled him closer towards her. "I'm your baby sitter and it's about time I did some babysitting!"

Those red eyes began to glow a creepy shade of crimson as that big smile, one worthy of the Joker, grew bigger. "It's time you went to bed, but first..." she looked down at Bart's shirt. He still completely covered in vomit from Maggies brief turn in the Mask, because of this he felt sticky and he really reeked. Bart looked back up at Lisa and didn't like that look in her eyes "...I think the baby needs a bath."

Suddenly Bart felt a great tug on his shirt and he was pulled off his feet. Everything was whooshing past him so quickly he didn't have time to register any of it. Speed like this was fun he remembered while wearing the Mask but being dragged by his shirt at such speeds was just terrifying.

When they came to a stop Bart could see where they had arrived, they were not in the same place as before. They were now both back in the house and in the upstairs bathroom.

Lisa almost slammed him down onto the closed toilet seat before she parted the shower curtains around the bath with such force that she and nearly ripped them off their rings. She then turned on the facets and started filing the bath.

A very unnerving look crossed Lisa's face as she looked at his vomit covered form. "Common babies play with their food..." Lisa said adopting the voice of an intellectual "but the low IQ Bart plays in someone else's!"

Bart's brain, though not very smart, had alarm bells ringing around inside it. She'd nearly killed him the last time and this time it looked like she might finish the job. Every fibre of his being told him she was going to try to drown him.

He quickly pushed himself up off the toilet seat while Lisa was busy with the bath and tried to make a run for it through the still open bathroom door, but he immediately fell over forwards when something pulled on both his shoes at the same time. He landed on the floor and tried to get back up but his feet refused to move no more than a few inches apart. He rolled over and saw that somehow his own shoe laces had been tied together but more than that, his torso was now wrapped in some sort of white jacket with the arms tied behind the back, like a straight jacket you'd put on someone in the loony house.

"What the heck!" he screamed as he tried to break free of this jacket which was preventing him from untying his shoes so he could escape. Instead he decided to try to hop away, but the moment he turned towards the bathroom door it swung shut in his face of its own accord.

Bart heard the unmistakable squeaking of facets being turned off and he knew the bath was now full of water and though he wasn't facing her he could feel Lisa's creepy red eyes on him. He felt arms wrap around him and felt himself being lifted up off the floor, something Lisa managed with little effort.

She swivelled on the balls of her feet so he was facing the bath. Bart could see what was coming next and fought his bonds as hard as he could but the straight jacket refused to release him. When he was over the water she dropped him into the bath. The impact caused a tidal wave which spilled over the side of the bath and sloshed all over the floor.

Barts head was momentarily under the warm water and in his panic he swallowed some of the soapy water before his head broke the surface again, spitting and coughing at the disgusting soapy liquid he had just swallowed. His clothes that he was still wearing were completely drenched and sticking to his skin.

"Get ready for the spin cycle!" she said, and with one leap she landed in the bath with him. _What was she..._ but comprehension dawned on him as she raised her arms and prepared to send herself into a spin, _oh no!_

There was nothing Bart could do to stop his sister as she began rotating around rapidly in the water. Her form twisted the air around her but the tail end of this tornado she formed began sucking up the water in bath creating what looked like a twisting column of water. As the water level began to slowly drop in the bath Bart tired to put as much distance between himself and this sister twister as much as possible, but it actually began coming closer to him. He instinctively took a deep breath as he felt the tail of this water column tug at his feet, suddenly he was pulled into the twister so fast he almost lost all his breath to yelp in surprise.

He felt himself spinning around in this watery vortex, the water scrubbing against his face, his hair, everything, it felt like being in a washing machine. He risked opening his eyes so he could at least see what was going on, but he could see very little because everything beyond the water column was whirling around him so fast that it was all mixed up. But every few seconds he caught sight of what looked like a whirl pool stretching the length of the water column and guessed that this must be Lisa.

After a little while Bart feared he'd drowned in here when he felt his lungs start to burn for him to breathe again but as soon as he felt this everything came to an abrupt halt and he felt himself emerge from the water. When he was free he took gratefully large gulps of air to ease the pain in his chest.

Right now Bart would've wondered why he wasn't dizzy from the spin cycle, but as he tried to move he noticed something even more unusual.

He was somehow suspended 5 feet from the ground and didn't appear to be falling towards the floor. Around him were very large bubbles of water, floating around as if they were all in zero gravity, like they were in space.

He was just above the bath which was completely empty apart from one person who was standing in it completely dry as a bone, that person was Lisa. She slowly climbed out of the bath and brushed herself down before she turned back to look at Bart and the floating water bubbles.

"Okay gravity" she said snapping her fingers "Do what you do best"

Bart felt gravity take hold and he started to fall and as did all the water around him started to follow. Some of the water splashed back into the bath before he landed in it but it wasn't enough to break his fall completely as he landed in the bath on his shoulder. He then felt the rest of the bath water rain down on top of him like a burst rain cloud.

As Bart broke the surface of the bath water he felt his left arm was aching, it wasn't broken or dislocated, he didn't think so at least, it just hurt like hell especially when he touched it, he was certain he'd get a bruise there in the morning. He registered that the bath water had turned a very pale orange colour, from the vomit that had covered him.

"There we go" Lisa said standing just beside the bath "The babies nice and clean"

As Bart looked into Lisa's menacing eyes his insides froze. Why was Lisa even acting like this?

_"You think I wanted to do those things, do you think I wanted to be like that?"_ was what she had said to him when they were fighting over the Mask. Despite not being very bright and he admitted it, Bart sort of started to understand. Maybe it's not the wearers choice what the Mask turns them into.

"No, Lisa please!" he didn't care how pathetic he sounded he was too frightened, frightened for his own life and safety "Leave me alone"

"'Leave me alone?' Isn't that what I've been saying for, Oh..." she'd started off sounding reasonable, but then she leant in close to him, her red eyes burning with anger as she said through gritted teeth "...eight years of my life?" She then pulled back before continuing in a mocking voice and rolling her crimson eyes like a loon "LEAVE ME ALONE, LEAVE ME ALONE!"

Bart drew back as far as he could as Lisa gave this crazed performance. "Oh get a grip!" she said as she reached forward to grab him. Bart shrank away a look of utter terror on his face. Lisa's face was frightening, a toothy grin that's the biggest she had managed so far and her eyes had gone a blank glowing white, there was no other word to describe it, it just looked completely evil.

Bart couldn't stop a fearful yelp escape from his throat and as if this had an effect Lisa's hands suddenly stopped moving towards him. Bart continued to cower in one corner of the bath as Lisa's eyes blinked a few times, each time they looked like they were regaining some form of sanity. She drew herself back looking at her hands with a look on her face that said she was both curious and at the same time worried like she didn't understand what had just happened to her. She shook her head rapidly to clear it and it briefly became a whirl of motion before it stopped.

"Kids" that was Homers voice. For once Bart didn't care about the Mask anymore, he didn't care if mom or dad found out about it, he just wanted to survive through this night in one piece.

He opened his mouth to yell for help but with surprising speed Lisa scooped up the shower head, stuck the nozzle end in his mouth and turned it on full blast to stop him speaking.

Bart felt a great torrent of water push into the back of his mouth but it didn't go down his throat, instead he felt the water cartoonishly erupt from his ears like a fountain. He wanted to hold his breath but for some reason, he couldn't understand why he was somehow still able to breathe through his nose despite water gushing into the back of his mouth and out through his ears. The experience wasn't painful or unpleasant, it just felt really odd. He wanted to fight back and pull the shower head out of his mouth that Lisa held tightly to him and call for help, but what he was experiencing was such an odd sensation for some reason he couldn't do it.

"I'm going back to meet your mother back at the car. That ghost seems to be gone" Homer said referring back to when Santas Little Helper briefly wore the Mask and Homer mistook him for a ghost. Bart was surprised he could still hear anything with all this water erupting from his ears, but for some reason he could.

"But just stay on your guard, okay!" Homer shouted up the stairs.

"Don't worry we'll be fine, dad!" Lisa called back to him. Bart fought against his sisters grasp but it felt like she had the strength of ten of him. Only when Bart heard the front door slam closed did Lisa pull the shower head out of his mouth and the water stopped jetting from his ears.

He had to get the Mask off Lisa, running away wasn't going to solve this because with the powers of the Mask she'd always be right on his tail. That's when he noticed his arms were free, the straight jacket that had been wrapped around his torso had simply vanished, when he didn't know but this was good, all he had to do now was wait for the right moment to strike and take the Mask.

"Come here baby, it's time for bed" Lisa said as she reached out towards him again this time with less menace in her eyes, despite Bart's plan to remove the Mask from his sister his fear gave way and he moved away from her as fast as he could.

"No way!" Bart suddenly found his voice as he avoided her grasping hands. "You tried to kill me!" he added accusingly trying to flatten himself to the opposite side of the bath. At these words Lisa stopped trying to reach out for him and gave him a curious glance.

"Hey!" she said with annoyance "What kind of corporeal manifestation of my own unstable subconscious do you take me for?" she said "You tried to kill me!" she added in a mock high squeaky voice. "Trust me I won't... unless I have to. All I want is to clean you up and get you to bed, it's what babysitters do." Though her voice sounded sincere the look in her eyes didn't look as truthful. The next moment she'd lent forward and pushed her rubber face onto his so their eyes were close together and the menace returned to her voice "That and I'm sick of being sister to such a rotten, despicable, merciless, thoughtless little boy, a boy who thinks the height of excitement is dropping a plastic spider down my dress, a brother who doesn't even care how miserable he makes me, a brother who is insensitive and nasty and has more teeth then brain cells! You've played countless tricks and pranks on me, so I'm simply repaying the dept!"

This was the moment to strike he decided, while Lisa's face was so close to his. Bart's hands shot up and snagged the rubbery substance around her cheeks and tried to pull it away. Lisa pulled back away from him and grabbed both his arms by the wrists and kept tightening her grip trying to get him to let go of her. Her grip tightened and almost became vice like but Bart refused to let his hands open as he tried to pull back on the Mask.

As he struggled to remove the Mask Bart noticed another odd and terrifying thing occurring before his eyes. Lisa's hands which were still wrapped around his wrists were starting to slacken but only because it looked like they were starting to morph and change shape. Her grip slackened even more as her fingers became longer and thinner until they solidified into two pairs of shiny, silver scissors blades, and his wrists were between the two, sharp blades of both of them. He yelped in surprise and let go of the Mask, pulling his hands away just as the blades snapped shut.

"Don't play with scissors, little boy" _Elisa Scissor Hands_ said as her hands quickly morphed back into her real hands "you can seriously hurt yourself."

She reached forward and pulled the plug in the bath and the water started draining out down the plug hole.

"As I said, time for bed!" she said as she reached out and grabbed Bart's shirt tightly in her grip and again and in the next whirl of motion they had changed position again, they were now in his bedroom.

Lisa slammed him onto the bed and quickly covered him in blankets and tucked them in so tightly he couldn't move and to make sure he never got out she strapped several large belts around his bed, further limiting his movement.

"How about a story?" Lisa said as she appeared at his bed side with a book in her hands and a pair of half moon spectacles perched on her nose. She looked down at a book in her hands entitled 'Of mice and men' which she was holding upside down.

She then said her next few words incredibly fast, but still slow enough that he caught what she was saying. "Once upon a time there was a little girl who babysitting her brother, but she got so angry when he wouldn't go to sleep that she took his head and shoved it up his own butt! Now he roams around the house all day looking for the light switch! And they all lived happily ever after, except the brother with the head up his backside who couldn't either eat or defecate but already had a readymade food source to eat. The End!"

She slammed the book shut and tossed it over her shoulder as she got to her feet and began to sing a lullaby to him. A lullaby Lisa usually sings to Maggie, but this seemed to be her own version with a few alterations. Her voice for a moment lost all that menacing distortion and became soft, sweet and fluid for one line, then changed back to heavily monstrous and menacing for the next line which outlined something horrible.

"Hush little baby don't say a word, **cos I'll make sure it's never heard!"**

"Sleep like the animals on a farm, **or you'll have worse than a bruised arm!"**

"Dream and drift off like a pup, **and I really hope you don't wake up!"**

"Now just you rest that sleepy head"

She put her face frighteningly close to his to make sure the point of the last line got across.

"**or you are sooo dead!"**

She then took Barts head roughly in her hands and kissed him on the forehead. As she pulled herself back her lips stretched out in a very cartoony manner. It felt to Bart like she was trying to suck his brains out when she stopped and her lips came off with a loud pop like a plunger and returned to her face.

"Tastes like chicken!" she licked her lips as she turned and retreated out of the room.

"Sleep tight" Lisa said as she slowly began to close the door on him "and don't let the bed bugs bite" though it was only a saying the way Lisa said it gave it an extra edge of creepiness. When the door was only inches from closing she forcefully slammed it shut and Bart was left in the darkness.

* * *

Lisa clapped her hands together for a job well done. She really has taught Bart a very important lesson in life, 'Don't ever mess with the Baby Sitter!' She was surprised she didn't do all this the last time she babysat him, it would've saved her a lot of grief.

She held back from actually injuring him, let's face it she'd probably end up being insoluble when the Mask came off again and she could not stand the thought of her moping around again afterwards. She didn't understand why she cared about what would happen in the morning anyway, Homer never did after a night at Moe's. It felt as if there was something holding her back trying to prevent her from doing any lasting damage to her devil of a brother. Oh well, Bart wouldn't forget what she's done to him in a hurry anyway.

She laced her hands together and cracked her knuckles and stretched her arms at the same time. Oh man, it was good to feel this way again, she really did have too many social inhibitions. She'd felt trapped for all those weeks, her own tortured mind her prison. Why did she have to worry so much about stuff life the environment, about people's rights? About how screwed up this country and indeed the entire planet was? When she could **do** and **be** it all by simply putting the Mask on.

As she approached the stairs she stopped, regarded the rail running down it and a look of mischief crossed her green face. Why should she just walk down the stairs? In one leap she managed to jump up and land balanced perfectly on the banister and as if she was skiing down a ramp she let herself skid down the rail and jumped off when she reached the end and landed with superior grace.

What should she do now she wondered with Bart and Maggie were safely tucked away in bed now? She usually liked babysitting because of all the responsibility it entitled, but now the idea of 'responsibility' was just boring and dull to her, how could she lead such a boring life?

A very, very bad smell then assaulted her nostrils all of a sudden a very warm, rancid smell.

"UGH!" she waving her hands in front of her face "Did someone just dig up Jimmy Hoffa?"

The smell, she guessed was of all that vomit in the kitchen Maggie had spewed up while she was wearing the Mask. That's something for her to do she decided and as quick as a flash she was in the stinking kitchen. She leapt into the large puddles of vomit and began skating on the damp floor as if it was made of ice. In fact she did have a pair of black, solid ice skates on her feet but in her current condition and with the powers of Loki at her disposal why should she question this twisted logic or why ice skates were working on water?

She sent herself into a skating spin which she quickly allowed herself to kick start the 'twister' as she liked to call it. Though she was spinning very fast she was aware of what was going on around her. All the vomit and chunks in it were being forced into the tail of the tornado and were swirling around her. She whirled around the kitchen allowing the tail of the twister to suck up all the remaining stinking gloop like a vacuum cleaner.

She'd better dispose of it in a safe place, somewhere were mom wouldn't find it or be suspicious. So in a matter of seconds she went outside and dropped all she was carrying; into the Flanders backyard.

She didn't see anything wrong with this, Homer dumped loads of crap into Flanders backyard like he was a waste disposal centre and Flanders didn't seem to mind too much anyway. So what was a bit of foul smelling vomit compared to dad dumping garbage bags over the fence?

After disposing of the evidence she returned to the kitchen and observed her handy work. The entire kitchen glistened it was so clean, maybe though it looked a little too clean. So clean mom might be suspicious of the absence of any type of mess, but what the hell if mom got suspicious? Mom was a mom she was supposed to get suspicious when stuff was done or even not done.

Okay, she thought as she started mentally going through her check list, sent Maggie and Bart to bed, check. Cleaned up all the evidence, check. Now what?

She leaned against the wall for a moment and started to mull over what she should do now? She was aware that a light bulb had appeared above her head –energy saving of course- as she considered a few possibilities.

She had an idea, but the energy saving bulb above her head lit up only dimly. Annoyed at this she flicked it with her index finger _these things always take ages to light up_! If anyone was watching this, she thought, Lisa standing there thinking with a dimly lit light bulb above her head it was probably giving the impression she was having a really crap idea.

Babysitters usually sat down to study for the rest of the night; it's what Lisa would do. _Get lost!_ said a voice in her head, that really was a crap idea, _Why should I waste an opportunity like this studying?_

All of these thoughts were driven from her head when she then heard the pitter patter of padded feet, followed by a low growl as Santa's Little Helper slowly walked into the kitchen. He barked loudly at Lisa as if she was something to be feared.

"What's that Lassie?" Lisa said as the dog barked again "You've crapped on the carpet again?"

Santa's Little Helper continued to bark, then growled menacingly and looked like he was about to pounce and attack her. Unconcerned, Lisa held up her right hand to stop him leaping at her and the dog delayed for just a moment, but it was all she needed. She closed her eyes and when she opened them again she morphed her face into the most grotesque, ugliest thing she could think of.

The skinny dog stopped barking immediately and its face fell in fear. In the next moment he turned tail and ran as fast as he could away from her.

Lisa allowed her face to deflate and fall back into its original shape and she cackled.

Creak, creak, creak. Came a long drawn out noise from somewhere close by, what was that?

* * *

Sideshow Bob had finally regained consciousness and his coordination. He had no idea what happened to him to send him back down into the basement but he remembered a baby with a giant green head attacking him, smashing his feet and slamming him into the ground before tossing him away like a used toy.

Though he doubted how true his memories were he had to admit his feet did hurt like an excessive weight had been dropped on them. It must've been an hallucination, probably caused by him hitting his head sometime, or maybe when he received a massive electrical shock earlier. That's it, he must've passed out from it, he guessed.

Each step he took made a sharp jolt of pain run through his feet, he had no idea why his feet were in so much pain but he ignored the question. Despite the pain there was one thought still driving him to climb these stairs. He was going to finish what he started and kill Bart and Lisa Simpson, his hatred kept him climbing and ignoring the pain in his feet.

He reached the top of the stairs, turned the door handle and opened the door a crack gently so he could see what was beyond it. Light spill through the gap onto him. It didn't look like there was anyone in his way and so he gently pushed the door open a little more and took another knife from his belt. He didn't know where the other two knifes he'd brought along were but that didn't matter, as long as he had one good sharp knife he could gut those two kids alive.

In the next moment something long and narrow flew into his mouth, it felt like some sort of cylinder and attached to either end was a long wire. What the heck was this? He felt something pull on the strings, it felt like a harness you'd put around the mouth of a horse.

Before he could pull it away someone landed on his back as if he was giving a piggy back ride to them. Then the person, whoever it was pulled forcefully on the wires connected to the thing in his mouth which pulled back his cheeks painfully.

"Giddy up!" screamed a high pitched unearthly sounding voice as Bob shook himself this way and that, even bucking himself to get this person off his back. "YEEEEE HAAAAA!"

"Get off me!" he mouthed with the object in his mouth. It felt like this person was trying to ride him like a horse. Why wasn't this kid, he assumed it was a kid because she felt quite small and light in weight, why wasn't the kid falling off? No matter what he did this mischievous brat somehow managed to remain on his back.

"HIGH HO, TERWILLIGER!" she bellowed, it sounded like a she at least.

Bob caught a glimpse of his attacker in a reflection in the window, the darkness outside made the reflection very clear. It had the appearance of that little girl Lisa Simpson, only she had a big green Halloween mask on her face like what kids wear when they're playing witches. She was also dressed in bright pink cowgirl riding costume and the points of her yellow hair were combed back. She held onto the harness –because that's what the thing in his mouth looked like- with her right hand and held a large cowboy hat in the left.

In the next moment he stopped his struggles and swung himself backwards off his feet to land on his back with the intent of landing on the girl, but before he impacted with the ground it felt like the girl had vanished, simply vanished from his shoulders as if she was never there.

He slammed into the ground and quickly twisted around, that girl had indeed completely vanished as had the harness over his mouth as if they had never existed, though his cheeks felt numb from where it had been. He looked around wondering if there were any other nasty surprises anywhere.

Everything looked normal and everything was silent apart from the snoring of the elder Simpson in the dining room blissfully unaware of what was going on around him while he slept.

Bob then realised he'd dropped his knife in the struggle, it lay on the floor close to the stairs. He crawled towards it and his fingers curled around the hilt but just as he was about to pick it up a foot came down and stamped on the blade preventing him from raising it.

The foot was wearing a pair of blood red, plastic sandals like those worn by Lisa. If this was Lisa then she'd be his first kill of the night, but when he looked up at Lisa.

That was Lisa? Bob wondered, she looked exactly like that girl who was sitting on his back not ten seconds ago but was dressed in different clothes, how the heck had she changed her clothes so fast? She was now dressed in a similar dress to Lisa except it was dark blood red rather than the usual lighter red and she was still wearing that green Halloween mask with the unusual hair cut. Was this really Lisa? It must be, there should be no other children in the house.

"Didn't mama ever teach you to 'NEVER' play with knifes?" her voice sounded creepy and inhuman as well. Bob had worked in theatre and knew of certain devices that could be used to produce such a ghostly voice, but Lisa didn't appear to be wearing anything like a voice modulator so how was she making her voice so unearthly?

"If you think a simple Halloween mask and cheap theatrics will scare me Lisa Simpson, you've got another thing coming!" Bob managed to wrench the knife from under Lisa's foot and raised it. She didn't even try to resist him and didn't look the slightest bit concerned as he plunged the knife towards her and felt the hilt reach her chest. He'd did it! He'd killed one of the Simpson kids! That blade would've... his thoughts were interrupted, something didn't feel right.

Not only did Lisa not look dead, in fact her eyes which were looking down towards the knife turned to looked up to regard him again, they had a rather bored expression. Bob then looked down at the knife which should've killed her and his eyes widened.

The blade wasn't even penetrating her body, though the tip was poking into her chest the metal blade wasn't behaving like a solid knife, it was bending and twisting as if it was made of rubber. Did he pick up a joke knife by mistake? He pulled it away and the knife blade became straight as an arrow again and it looked solid enough. He tried to drive it in again but the blade just warped and bent again, this time curling and bending back, it hadn't even managed to piece Lisa's dress.

This didn't make sense, he was certain all the knifes he had were sharp and deadly, he'd made sure of it before he came out here, they shouldn't be bending like this.

Bob looked up into Lisa's eyes. She still had that look of boredom on her face and she let her head tilt to one side, like a curious little kid before she looked down at the knife again and regarded it with just as much boredom.

The next thing Bob knew Lisa's hand had reached up with surprising speed and snatched the knife from him. She held it in her left hand, flipped it end over end a few times before she caught it on its point on the tip of her index finger of her left hand and balanced it perfectly on the tip.

"Is it my turn yet?" she grinned at him. Bob quickly pushed himself away from her, she was behaving as if this was some sort of game to her, she wasn't even scared nor did she look threatened.

Lisa then let the 'trick' knife slid into her hand and she cocked her arm back and tossed the knife at him with worrying speed but the sharp blade missed, shot past him and buried itself in the wall just next to where his head was. The knife entered blade first and went in about an inch and stood almost perpendicular to the wall. The hilt and the blade was slowly wagging back and forth showing it was still solid and still deadly when just a few moments ago it behaved like rubber.

Bob reached out and took the hilt to halt its wagging before he got to his feet and tried to free it from the door frame but as he pulled it refused to budge. He then took the knife in both hands and pulled again but it still wouldn't move. He rocked himself back and forth while keeping a tight grip on the knife, but try as he might it remained stuck there.

Bob stopped trying to release the knife when he saw Lisa slowly begin to advance towards him. The child's red irises began to glow a dark shade of crimson like she was possessed by a demon. The glowing eyes were making her mischievous grin –which was full of baseball sized teeth- all the more sinister.

This was really freaky, but Bob had seen too many special effects in TV and theatre to be fooled by this, but despite this he found himself backing away from this unusual sight.

As Bob backed away he knocked into a table and heard something rolling around on it. The object was a tall white vase fighting to stay upright as it rolled on its base. Without hesitation Bob took the vase in his hands and used it as a substitute weapon for the knife. He slammed it down on this devil Lisa's head and the vase shattered into a million tiny pieces.

Bob's jaw dropped, Lisa had neither stopped her advance nor behaved like she even register this attack on her head and kept advancing towards him. The sharp pottery shards didn't even cut her skin or rip holes in that mask, she was completely undamaged. What the heck was going on?

There was another vase on the table, this one was full of flowers he noticed but that minor detail didn't stop him from grabbing it in a panic and swinging it down over Lisa's head. This one didn't shatter though because with lightning fast reflexes Lisa caught the porcelain weapon in her hand and wrenched it from his grasp. She stopped advancing for a moment and regarded the flowers in the vase.

"Oh, for me? You shouldn't have" she held them up to her nose and took a heavy sniff of their scent and for a moment looked calm and normal. But her eyes quickly reverted back to that crazy glare "I'll make sure to put them on your grave."

Bob couldn't understand what the heck was going on. Micro cars on the floor, rakes carelessly left out, that he could understand. What he couldn't understand is how Lisa, despite being only a few feet tall, managed to conceal that 42 inch long baseball bat she was pulling out from behind her back like it was hiding there the whole time.

This was too much, he must be dreaming or still hallucinating, he decided, but though he was certain this wasn't real he decided to obey his minds suggestion to get the hell out of this mad house! He turned on his large feet and tried to retreat out the back door to safety but he felt something pull on his hair causing him to lose his balance and fall onto the floor on his back.

He saw the devil Lisa simply drop the baseball bat behind her which clattered to the floor as she pulled on his hair. Despite her small size she managed to lift him off the ground and began swinging him around her head like a cowboy with a lasso.

"Who said there wasn't enough room in here to swing a cat?" she said laughing like a loon to herself.

Though he couldn't make out his surroundings very well Bob did notice that the light of his surroundings was becoming much dimmer. Were they moving? He was spinning so fast he couldn't tell. The light became dimmer until it was almost completely black. What was this crazed girl going to do with him? He worried, but in the next few seconds he had his answer.

She let go of his hair but his momentum was still there, he was sent flying off unbelievably rapidly into the sky. He could see that he was outside and fast receding away from the Simpson household and with each passing second he gained more height and distance from his target building.

Just before the Simpsons house vanished from view he heard that devil form of Lisa shout at him.

"Hey, drop me a postcard when you reach Alaska!"

* * *

"...and p_alm tree hair_ is going... going... gone!" Lisa bellowed "It's gone! That _palm tree head guy_ is heading none stop to Alaska!"

She laughed as she watched Bob vanish off into the distance. He'll be alright when he comes down though she was certain of that somehow, there would be something to break his fall. Though she really wanted him to come down and smash himself onto the solid ground she unfortunately felt that little part of her that was still Lisa Simpson tug at her heart strings again, why the heck does she still have that part of her still? It was redundant, it should pack its bags and move out, it should at least pay rent so she could get some money out of it taking up valuable space in her head.

She didn't know why she was thinking these absurd thoughts, but in the end it meant her conscience had stopped her from really injuring the would-be-murderer, but at least it didn't kick in while she gave Bob the scare of his life, that was the best bit so far! She turned around and returned to the house and closed the door completely forgetting about Bob's flight.

Grandpa was still snoring away in the dining room. He slept through that whole thing? Probably for the best she decided, if he saw any of this he'd probably have a heart attack.

She decided to let Grandpa stand there and snore, she didn't want him to wake up and see her and anyway he seemed pretty happy where he was. Then her ultra sensitive ears picked up movement from upstairs, someone wasn't in bed, someone was up and that someone was obviously Bart Simpson. Didn't he hear her when she sang the lullaby 'Go to Bed or you are Dead' to him?

In the fraction of a second the powers of Loki allowed her to be upstairs before you could blink and went to the source of the noise. She began to morph her features into another grotesque face to give that 'Bart Brat' the scare of his life. But halfway through morphing into this ugly creature she suddenly realised it wasn't Bart who was up, it was Maggie who was looking up at her half morphed face with just as much fear and dread as she had intended for Bart.

Lisa held the ugly face for a moment, her eyes looked at Maggie in surprise while her brain registered this mistake. Then she let her face drop back to what it originally looked like, like a deflating balloon her features returned to their correct proportions and places before Maggie could start crying, but surprisingly Maggies reaction was not the one Lisa was expecting. The baby Simpson clapped her hands and sucked on her pacifier, thinking this was some sort of magic trick.

"What are you doing up?" she said, even though her voice was ghostly and unearthly Maggie didn't seem to care and just regarded her as she usually does if she were just the normal Lisa Simpson.

She stepped forward and gently picked up the little baby in her arms.

"Why aren't you in bed?" she asked raising an eyebrow "Never mind that, how did you get out of your crib?"

Maggie didn't answer, she was a baby of course she couldn't answer. Lisa felt she wouldn't be fulfilling her duties as self appointed babysitter if she didn't put all the kids to bed before she did anything else, so Lisa began carrying her back into her bedroom. She gentle set Maggie back down in her crib again and tried to tuck her in but Maggie wouldn't stop fidgeting and refused to stay still. Why wouldn't she stay still? She kept squirming she was like a slippery eel. This was really starting to become annoying and was starting to make her blood boil.

"Will you just go to bed!" she shouted loudly at the baby clenching her fists tightly glaring at Maggie. The baby stopped squirming and looked up at her with a mixture of fear, dread and sadness. Lisa immediately regretted her outburst when she saw her younger siblings eyes start to become moist and Maggie burst into tears. The one thing Lisa didn't expect to feel in her current state of mind was sorry and regret, but that was exactly what she was feeling.

"Shhh, shhhh, shhhh, it's alright Maggie" she said trying to make her voice as kind as possible, she really didn't need this screaming right now! In a flash she vanished and in those brief few seconds she'd gone down into the kitchen, picked up Maggies bottle and returned to her crib, but Maggie didn't seem interested in her bottle and continued to cry. Again Lisa vanished and came back with baby food but still Maggie didn't seem interested.

"What do you want?" she said holding her hands over where her ears were under the Mask. She grabbed her hair and pulled on it, though the strands stretched they didn't break or fall out. With the force she was pulling on them her hair would've fallen out had it not been for the Mask. "Okay Maggie, you're right. That was uncalled for, I've been bad, look!"

Lisa pulled out a large wooden mallet from nowhere and smashed it over her own head, Lisa didn't feel any pain and she knew she wasn't going to have any lasting damage since the Mask protects you as she continued to smash the mallet over her own head.

"Bad dobby, bad dobby, bad dobby..." why was she calling herself that? "I mean... bad Lisa, bad Lisa, bad, bad, bad Lisa" she continued to smash the mallet over her head and with each impact her face looked more dazed and mangled. Lisa felt her large teeth break cartoonishly with the sound of smashing plates and one or two even fell out as she did this. Smash, smash, smash, she went until birds erupted from her head and started circling her crown. The birds tweeted loudly as they circled her head and despite not feeling any pain Lisa did feel slightly dazed and was swaying on her feet.

Thankfully this display actually stopped Maggie crying. She clapped her hands again and laughed almost gleefully enjoying the entertainment of Lisa injuring herself.

_She better not expect entertainment like this from me every night, it'll kill me_. In her daze she fell back to the ground slightly confused, it took Lisa a little while to regain some of her wits after the assault she forced upon herself. If she hadn't been wearing the Mask while doing this she would've seriously hurt herself, but then she conceded that if she wasn't wearing the Mask she'd never have bashed herself over the head with a heavy wooden mallet the first place.

With Maggie feeling better Lisa stood up after she had beaten herself down, shook her head rapidly causing the birds circling her crown to vanish and her teeth to magically return to her jaws, arranged back in their perfect rows. When she stopped shaking her head she was back to her usual masked self.

Feeling much better, Lisa gently lay Maggie back down into her crib and began covering her with her blankets as she sang her usual lullaby to her.

"Now, hush little baby don't say a word..." she began to sing, her voice adopted a very sweet and a fluidity she didn't think she was even capable of while wearing Loki's mischief mask. "Mama's gonna buy you a mocking bird..." Lisa gently tucked Maggie into bed as gently as if she were the old Lisa Simpson. "...and if that mocking bird don't sing..." She trailed off as her hypnotic singing sent Maggie back to a deep slumber again.

Lisa had nothing against Maggie, apart from being a loud noise box when she didn't get her own way but Lisa had to admit even while wearing this thing that she still felt closer to Maggie then she did to anyone else, because unlike Bart, Maggie couldn't talk back and ridicule her.

Lisa gently smoothed out the crib covers and watched Maggie cutely curl up to sleep. Lisa smiled lightly and gently leant over and gently kissed her baby sister on the forehead before lightly and quietly stepping out of Maggies bed room and gently closing the door.

"Now, back to our regular scheduled programming!" she said out loud her voice back to its usual ghostly echo as she walked over to Barts bedroom door. She gently opened the door a crack to see if Bart was still in bed. The large belts were still buckled over the bed and Bart himself who still looked very fearful and frightened as Lisa observed him from the crack in the door. When he spotted her he immediately closed his eyes and pretended to be asleep. _Oh well close enough._ She thought as she closed the door again, at least Bart wouldn't get into any trouble while she was getting into some trouble of her own.

She had unfinished business to attend to. Burns didn't seem to get the message when she trashed his attempt to cut down Springfield forest. She resisted the last time but now she felt it was time for a repeat performance at the house of Burns himself, but for this one she'll kick it up a notch.

She twisted her arms and set herself spinning into the tornado again as she raced down the stairs and was out the front door and was far away before you could blink. She had a planet to save, animals to rescue, starving children to feed, governments to topple, authorities to defy and houses to egg.

Tonight, she intended to do some good in the world... BUT FIRST!

* * *

Moaning and head pounding Sideshow Bob came back to the waking world. He didn't know how long he'd lost consciousness for but it was still dark so he guessed it hadn't been long since he took off on his little flight.

He lay on the hard ground peered up through the treetops into the starry sky. He lay next to the trunk of a tree and was surrounded by broken twigs. They must've broken his fall as he fell back to earth. He was alive at least and though he questioned the memories he seemed to have, babies with giant green heads, knifes that are solid one minute and rubbery the next, and...

He lay his head back on the ground, he must've hit his head on the way down because his head hurt, but his memories said it was when the demon Lisa swung him around by his hair, but he chose to ignore the memory.

With his head still pounding he stood up and began walking ignoring the pain in his head and his feet. He didn't know which way he was going or where he was but he wasn't going to sleep out here to be eaten by a bear or something.

After a few minutes of walking in a straight line he heard a faint noise, it sounded like wheels lightly rolling on loose soil then came the almost silent humming sound of an engine. As he approached the noise he saw a light between the trees, it crossed his field of vision from right to left and disappeared off into the distance followed closely by a pair of dimmer red lights. That was a car, which means there must be a road somewhere close by.

It wasn't hard to find but it wasn't what he was expecting. It was a country dirt road made of loose sand and stony soil. He wasn't likely to come across many cars he could use to hitchhike to somewhere, but roads always lead somewhere. Soon he was following it in one direction, it was either one way or the other but he didn't know were either way went anyway so he just guessed and started following where that car had rolled off towards.

He walked for a little while longer, the dirty crunching under his large feet. It suddenly occurred to him that he didn't know how he even got here. He briefly remembered flying through the air incredibly fast, but his head was swimming and it hurt to think, was he concussed? So he held all these thoughts until after he'd slept and had some food in his stomach.

A little ways along he saw something in the darkness, whatever it was it was large and as he approached its jagged edges began to make its shape clearer. It was a car! A black sedan shaped car. It was standing stationary, doors open and trunk open and the driver and passengers apparently absent. Perfect, it was transport.

But he admitted he was curious to why the car was left out in the open in the middle of the forest like this. He looked left and right to see if the owners were anywhere near. There was no sign of them, perfect.

Something he did notice however was a sight he was familiar with. Not far in the distance was a large body of water, a lake and on the other side of it he could see a nuclear plant its cooling towers lightly steaming. That was the lake near Springfield forest, the lake that had been blocked by the Great Beaver Dam weeks previously before it was blown up.

He was a long, long way from the Simpsons house. Okay now he knew where he was, but was still struggling with the 'how he got there.'

Bob limped over to the vehicle, his feet were still sore from whatever happened to them. He closed the trunk and the passenger doors before climbing into the drivers seat and was about to rip off the housing off the steering wheel to jump start the car. You can pick up thousands of skills from the other prisoners in a penitentiary, it was like a university for criminals. Each prisoner in the Springfield penitentiary was experienced in some illegal field like grand theft auto, fraud, pick-pocketing the list of subjects was endless. Shame though the only area none of them excelled at was murder, because a requirement of murdering someone was to get away with it, so ironically if they ending up in prison to teach you about it they had completely failed to escape detection by the police.

Bob couldn't talk though, he couldn't even successfully murder a bunch of kids. They always seem to escape his grasp. His blood began to boil at the thought of the kids back at home laughing at him as he sat in a car he was about to steal feeling battered and bruised.

He was about to open the wheel housing a noise made him freeze, multiple clicks punched the silent night as effectively as a bang. His boiling blood began to run ice cold and all thoughts of Bart and Lisa were driven from his mind.

He slowly turned his head to look out the open drivers side door in the direction of these clicks, he felt his stomach drop. Just outside stood five people, all in dark suits, all with dark hair, all pointing hand guns at him. Bob slowly raised his hands away from the steering column and held them above his head. Around their feet were several spades and shovels that they had obviously dropped so they could draw their weapons.

"What have we got here!" said a short, skinny, curly haired man with a strong Italian accent.

"Looks like someone's trying to steal your car" said a very large, round, man with a balled patch at the back of his head and spoke in a very dull witted voice that made him sound simple. He also had a strong Italian accent. After he spoke those standing behind him glanced at him pitiful look without taking their guns off Bob.

By the way these tough guys looked and the way they spoke they were obviously part of the Mafia and they had just caught him trying to steal one of their vehicles and by the look of the shovels behind them they were dumping a body.

"Out of the car" said the short curly haired man, Bob slowly obeyed.

"Now gentlemen" Bob spoke trying to sound as cool as possible "this is all just a big misunderstanding"

"Yeah?" said the short Italian. Bob tried to think quickly.

"Of course" he said keeping his voice cool and level "I was under the impression the car was abandoned here. It appeared I was incorrect in my assumption so if you'll excuse me I'll walk back to Springfield."

He lowered his hands and tried to walk away when the curly haired Italian put out a hand to stop him.

"Hold it there" he said lowering his gun "Maybe we could give you a lift into town." There was an undertone to his voice Bob didn't like.

"Kind of you to offer my good man" he said still trying to play the part of the misunderstood gentlemen. "But I don't want to inconvenience you in any way."

"Nah, it's okay, we're heading back there anyway" he said as he took a step closer.

"Ah, but..." Bob was certain this wasn't going to end well "I'm afraid with five people in the car there would be no room for me to sit anyway."

"Who said you'd be riding with us?" the Mafia man nodded and Bob felt a sharp impact behind his head which forced him to the muddy ground. He rolled over onto his back and could make out the person with a knuckle duster who had just thumped him on the back of the head.

Bob's vision was starting to cloud and he was losing consciousness again. The last sentence he heard from the Mafia men was from the short one in charge.

"Stick him in the trunk, we'll take him with us."

* * *

**To Be Continued...**

* * *

**Authors notes:** Lisa's Mask is generally supposed to be nasty and cruel but only tries to frighten people who either annoy her or don't listen to her, though she can get phyiscally violent she saves it for someone who is either really annoying her or is completely 'uncooperative'.

I also wanted to establish that she's only nasty to those who she feels deserves it such as Bart or Sideshow Bob. Maggie for example is only a baby and has no idea what she's doing and because of the bond of sisterhood Maggie has with Lisa, Lisa/Mask is less inclined to be nasty towards her. It also shows that Lisa/Mask can be capable of compassion and kindness but Lisa's inner demons and insecurities are still pretty much what "guide" or control of her actions.

Updates are going to become less frequent because I have quite a work load.

Hope this fits better into the T rating this time.

* * *

**Changes I've made to the chapter on 12/01/2011 are...**

Originally Lisa/Mask stopped Bart talking to Homer by pushing his head under the water. (Replaced with the shower head gag.)

Originally Bob did manage to stick a knife into Lisa's chest up to the hilt. Though I liked the creepy scene and Bobs confusion to why Lisa wasn't dead or dying from her injury, in the end I thought it was a little too much for a T rated story. (Replaced with the knife that turns to harmless rubber when Bob tries to stab someone with it.)

Lisa also caused much more injury to Bart while she was wearing the Mask, but I felt this was straying from the original concept I had for Lisa/Mask. (Altered so she scares the living daylights out of him without causing much harm)

Also looking through the original chapter I found a list of spelling errors and gramma mistakes that I'm embarrassed I didn't find the first time I proof read it. (Now corrected.) _(I was under the weather when I proof read it, probably why.)_

Extra content added where the original chapter left off.


	15. This means War

**Authors notes:** The previous chapter was rewritten slightly, the overal plot of it hasn't changed but some things were tweeked a bit. There is also an extra part that was tagged onto the end which deals with what happened to Sideshow Bob after his little flight.

-Anyway, Enjoy

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 14**

**This means War!**

Lisa's Mask tornado form zoomed around Springfield, going from one street to another, the tail end of the twister occasionally tearing up chucks of the road. Lisa could now say she could fully understand why Bart pulled all those pranks on people; it was obvious, because it was fun! To humiliate someone in front of a crowd and you get a strange pleasurable satisfaction at watching them make fools of themselves or to watch them break down and just cry their eyes out, it was funny. Funny, but she doubted if her original self would appreciate it, she didn't seem to appreciate her current situation, her new found powers and what she could and indeed intend to do with them. She could tell and indeed she knew since she was part of the same brain that makes Lisa Simpson, she knew that her real self didn't like what she was doing.

As she whirled past a street she caught what sounded like childish giggles coming from someone close by. She came to a stop and literally fired herself back the other way and halted her rotation around a corner from where the noise was coming from. With little, next to no stealth at all she simply stepped around the corner and saw three figures in the middle of the road. They were teenagers, male teenagers and by those childish menacing low voiced giggles and scoffs they were up to no good. They were standing outside Principle Skinners house with a rucksack full of things, she doubted if they were attending afterschool homework club for two reasons, one the lack of a car in the drive told her both Skinner and his mother were out, and second it was in her experience that no kid in Springfield Elementary did homework, period. Oh and now a third, people going to a homework club usually don't carry a bag full of eggs.

She began to approach the three figures and it became apparent to her what they were doing. One of the teenagers, a tall one, cocked his arm back and threw the round, white egg at the house. It cracked open and shattered, spreading its liquid contents all over the outer walls. They were obviously doing a very childish prank called 'egging', they were egging the teachers' house.

With the first egg thrown the other two began throwing more of them towards the house and every one of them splattered against its walls.

"Skinner is going to freak when he sees this" said one of the teenage boys sniggering gleefully.

"Yeah" said another in agreement "it's going to take him forever to clean this stuff off"

As Lisa slowly approached, one of the three, a tall balled one probably heard her footsteps because he turned his head towards her and noticed her approaching. She didn't care though, she wanted them to notice she was there and was unconcerned about them, after all it's not as if they could hurt her while she was wearing the Mask, it protected her.

"Uh oh" the balled boy said nudging the others with his elbows "Guys, we've got company" he tried to say in a hushed voice but Lisa heard him all too clearly. The other two stopped their egging and slowly turned to see what their balled friend was pointing it.

Lisa recognized who these three were almost immediately; they were three of Springfield Elementary's top bullies. Jimbo Jones, a tall skinny boy who was wearing a dark shirt and knit cap over his long hair, Dolph Starbeam, a short boy, the shortest of the three, he had an asymmetric haircut with one lock of hair covering his right eye, and Kearny Zzyzwicz, a tall muscular boy with a buzz cut, a torn white shirt and studded wristbands. Though Lisa said Kearny was a boy and that he sounded like a boy there was always little trickles of information that make everyone suspect Kearny was much older then he appeared. According to Otto, the adult school bus driver, Kearny was in his 3rd grade class and that was years ago and he was once spotted shaving his 'beard' while in class.

"Hey, look at her" said Jimbo pointing and grinning, she was surprised such a dense monkey could learn how to do the two things separately.

"That is the ugliest Halloween mask I've ever seen" Dolph added

"That's not a mask, that's really her face" Kearny added and they all pointed and laughed at her. Lisa held her ground and did not look amused.

Lisa could feel her face start to burn hot with anger, though she doubted if any redness would show through the Mask her expression would convey her anger all the same. But like any schoolyard bully this only seemed to entice them to push her, and she welcomed it because it would then be all the more satisfying to wipe those smug looks from their faces.

"Hey, maybe an egging will make her look better" Jimbo said as he scooped up a fist full of eggs from the bag next to him and tossed them at her, each one landed and cracked over her face covering her in the egg contents. The other two then followed Jimbo's lead and they all started pelting her with eggs. Lisa stood her ground, closed her eyes and let the eggs fall on her, it didn't matter to her 'the yoke' was going to be on them.

The pelting didn't last long, only a few seconds because they obviously didn't want to waste all their ammunition on her. All three of them laughed as Lisa slowly raised her hands and scooped out the slime-y liquid from over her eyes and flicked it down to the ground.

"I smell three bad eggs here" Lisa said as the three bullies laughed at her now damp form. They also seemed oblivious to an egg that had landed on top of her head without breaking the yoke and was now, as they laughed, starting to sizzle and cook from her boiling anger as it sat there.

"I can name three reasons why that was a bad idea" she said, but the others just laughed and pointed at her. Lisa raised her right hand, palm held out towards them holding up her index finger and clutching all other fingers. Then she closed her index finger and immediately opened it along with her middle finger, a fresh white egg sat between those two fingers. "One" she said coldly as the bullies watched. She closed those fingers again keeping the egg wedged firmly between her two fingers. Then she opened all her fingers except her thumb, now with a second egg between her middle and ring finger. "Two" she closed her fingers again with the eggs still stuck between them and opened all her fingers including her thumb and between her index finger and thumb was a third white egg. "Three" she now had three eggs between her fingers.

She then tossed all three into the air and began to effortlessly juggle them in her right hand as she looked at the bullies coldly. But by the way they just stood there and grinned they obviously weren't going to take her seriously.

She stopped juggling, grinned, caught the first egg to fall into her waiting hand, quickly cocked her arm back and threw it as hard as she could before quickly catching the next one to fall, cocked her arm and tossed it, then caught the final one and threw it as well.

All three boys caught an egg in the face, but unlike their soft eggs these did not break apart and spread their contents over their faces, instead they remained whole and completely intact as they smashed into their faces. The bullies fell and landed on their back moaning and clutching their faces as if the only thing that cracked from the impact was their jaws and noses. What a bunch of babies.

Lisa approached the three slowly and unconcerned. She noticed Jimbo had suffered a broken nose which was bleeding very badly. Kearny had a visibly large lump rising from his balled head and Dolph's right eye was bruised very badly and started to swell but fortunately for him he can hide it under that flap of hair that goes over that one eye anyway.

Lisa knelt down and scooped up all three of her egg projectiles that had landed very close to their victims and were still in one piece. She began juggling them in her right hand again.

"Hmm. I guess they must've been 'hard' boiled" she quipped and a manic grin started to spread across her face.

As she tossed the eggs over and over in her hands she realized while she was having all this fun she had completely forgotten why she was out here. It was very easy to get distracted from your mission while you're in the Mask.

She wanted to see off Montgomery Burns from destroying the forest, she remembered. He was the cause of all the environmental suffering and misery in this town and it was time for some pay back. The last time she had resisted going to Burns' house and voicing her opinions because she had concerns of his black heart failing under the strain of her argument. But after all the evil, insensitive things he's done over the years she really doubted if he had a heart to fail in the first place. Therefore if he had no heart, he couldn't have a heart attack so she could safely voice her argument and he wouldn't die.

Though she was aware how ridicules this logic sounded she didn't care, any reason she can think of, any excuse she could get to convince that little bit of her holding her back to stop nagging at her to stop, then she was going use it. That little bit of her however wasn't convinced, but she didn't care, it was clobbering time!

It took her very little time to arrive at Burns' mansion and she easily slipped through the bars of the massive gate despite them being too narrow for her and walked up to the door as if she owned the place.

An unusual sight caught her eyes, _Oh how clever_ she thought _it looks like a Bulldozer crashed right into the wall of the mansion_. As she approached however she asked, wait why would Burns want what looks like a Bulldozer sticking out of the side of his mansion? The solution became obvious when she saw that the attention to detail on it was amazingly accurate but only because it was a real Bulldozer. In fact it was that same one she remembered launching into the air from a tree three weeks ago. She'd wondered where it went. It must've ploughed into the wall and was now sticking there like that famous ornament of a full sized Cadillac crashing into the exterior of a building.

Either way, it had nothing to do with why she was here she thought as she climbed the steps, walked up to the large pair of solid oak doors of the mansion and gently knocked.

Of course **you** know, this means War!

* * *

Police Chief Wiggum leaned back in his chair hearing the metal underneath it creak. He reached down and adjusted the controls on the side of the seat to make it lower itself backwards a little.

"Hey Chief!" said Lou behind him "You're gonna squash me"

"Never sit behind a fat man, Lou" Wiggum said as he lowered the tip of his cap over his eyes. His partners Lou and Ed were sitting with him in the squad car, Ed was in the driving seat idly drumming his fingers on the wheel keeping watch while Wiggum could hear Lou shifting over to the other side of the back seat.

They listened to the chatter of the radio, every now and again a call would come up indicating a 9-56 in somewhere, or something like that, why couldn't people take the law into their own hands for a change and let them have a vacation?

They were listening specifically for the call sign from the demolition site at the Springfield forest that would indicate _Green Face_ was attacking them again. They been here for several nights and so far nothing had happened.

Their squad car and several other cars were waiting at the back entrance to the site where the logging company was fast at work trying to clear the forest again after _Green Faces'_ last attack and last reported sighting. Three weeks and Wiggum hoped that restarting of the logging company would flush _Green Face_ back out, but they had been here for three days and nights and so far no one had showed their face -whether green or not- to wreck the place again, not even environmentalists.

"Hey Chief" said Lou again "Don't you think we should call this a day? We've been here three nights on stakeout and _Green Face_ in any of his forms hasn't showed up once."

"If I am right, he'll strike" he said with certainty, an effect that was probably ruined by his cap muffling his voice.

"You're putting too much priority on _Green Face,_ Chief."Lou complained _"_What about Sideshow Bob? We still haven't found him and he's an attempted murderer, and we haven't investigated the suspected plan to break Fat Tony out of prison and he fits people with concrete platform shoes, so far _Green Face_ hasn't hurt no body."

"True, true" Wiggum said waving his hand "but the _Green Face_ case came first. Priorities Lou, you really gotta learn to prioritise." He added patronisingly, "That's why I'm the police chief"

"Calling all cars, calling all cars!" said a loud voice from the radio "Confirmed _Green Face_ sighting at Burns' Mansion, officers require immediate back up, over."

At this Wiggum nearly leapt from his seat so fast he nearly ripped it off its runners on the car floor. He'd tricked them! The rotten swine like all criminals simply refused to fall into their hastily planned simple little traps, instead he'd gone after the man at the top.

"Let's roll Ed!" Wiggum called to his partner as he started and revved the engine. Wiggum picked up his CB radio from the car dash board and ordered all cars in the ambush squad to follow them to Burns' mansion.

Ed shifted the car into reverse and sped away backwards out of the logging site and onto the road where the car swerved to face the other way and started driving forwards the lights on the roof flashing and the siren whirling. Behind them dozens of other cars followed.

When they arrived at Burns mansion they at first had difficulty getting through the front gate because it was locked tight. Looking through the bars though they could see something was going on in that mansion, they could hear the sound of breaking... well of things breaking and every now and then there was a flash from one of the large windows.

As their car came to a stop Wiggum unbuckled his seat belt, got out of the car and walked up to the speaker grill set into the stone wall next to the gate. He pressed the button to alert someone at the mansion.

"Hello" said a voice from the other side of the connection.

"Madam, we're with the Springfield police and..."

"You have reached Burns' mansion" said the voice again "All our lines are busy, please hold, your call is important to us, in the meantime here's a little music...

Watcha gonna do, watcha gonna do, watcha gonna do when they come for you?

Bad Boys, Bad Boys

Watcha gonna do, watcha gonna do, watcha gonna do when they come for you?

Bad Boys, Bad Boys"

Confusion slowly grew on Wiggums face, funny, he thought, that's almost exactly the same message you get when you try to contact the Springfield Police department, same music too.

As the music played Wiggum felt something move past his leg. As he looked down he saw a bunch of squirrels rushing past him, through the gates and up towards the mansion. He paid them no mind though they weren't important, or were they?

"You are being held in a queue, please hold" said the voice again "or you may prefer to call back later..."

"Yeah!" Someone on the other side suddenly answered.

Wiggum cleared his throat to make his voice sound as official as possible "This is the police, we have a report of a disturbance in Burns mansion, may we come in to look."

"No one's allowed in, not no body, not no how!" the voice said adopting a very high pitched squeaky tone to it like an elf or something.

"Madam, this is Police Chief Clancy Wiggum of..." but the voice interrupted

"You mean Ralph's Police Chief Wiggum?" said the voice in surprise "Well now that a mule of a different colour!" and with that whoever was on the other side hung up. The large steal gates in front of him unlocked with a loud click and slowly started to part.

Springfield's Chief of police returned to the squad car and Ed immediately drove through the open gates followed by all the other squad cars backed up behind him. When they arrived Ed parked the car at the foot of the massive porch of the huge mansion and half the other cars circles around him to set up a block to make escape through the front door impossible.

The massive front door was wide open Wiggum noticed as he and all the other officers exited their vehicles. The sound of smashing and breaking could be heard echoing inside the house as well as muffled screams and protests. "No don't break that it's priceless" or "Give me that back to rotten little rodent!"

From the large open door came a very unusual sight, it looked like a bunch of beavers, maybe because it was a bunch of beavers, appeared from one side of the door and seemed to be carrying on their backs the stuffed remains of a much larger looking species of beaver. Then he saw what looked like a dozens of squirrels nibbling at the expensive looking carpet that lined the floor. On one side of the main hall Wiggum could see a priceless looking painting on the floor propped against the wall. It was set a light and burning away with... what looked like a couple of hedgehogs with marshmallows fitted firmly to each of their many quills had their backs to the fire trying to roast the squishy white snacks. This was like something out of Dr. Dolittle, Wiggum thought, it was bizarre and sounded exactly like _Green Face_.

Wiggum ducked as several birds flew through the door carrying what looked like priceless jewelled eggs in their claws. They flew away retreating into the forest.

As the other cops positioned themselves Wiggum went back into his squad car momentarily and retrieved a megaphone which he raised to his lips.

"OKAY _GREEN FACE"_ he said, the megaphone amplifying his voice "THIS IS THE SPRINGFIELD POLICE DEPARTMENT, WE HAVE YOU COMPLTELY SURROUNDED, COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS UP!"

Bang, went something in the house that caused the ground to shake violently, Wiggum feared a bomb had been set off. In the next moment a great gust of wind was blown through the large oak doors and what looked like a green and red coloured version of the Tazmanian Devil's twirling tornado appeared between the doors and exited the house with a loud whining sound. With the sound of a car breaking hard the twister slowed down revealing the form of the girl version of _Green Face_ at its core then she came to a complete stop facing them.

She regarded them at first with contempt, as if she didn't expect them to be much of a threat, but when dozens of police officers primed their pistols and shot guns and took careful aim at her, her eyes became wide with astonishment and her jaw dropped... and dropped all the way to her knees making the sound of a clanging anvil when it landed.

"_GREEN FACE, _YOU ARE UNDER ARREST!" Wiggum shouted into the megaphone "YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT!"

But at those words _Green Face's _mouth opened to the size of trash can lids and she screamed at the top of her lungs with a high pitched, ear splitting scream, clearly waving her 'right to remain silent.'

When she stopped Wiggum put his fingers in his ears and rotated them in an effort to remove the ringing that now echoed inside them. When he was satisfied he could hear again he picked up his megaphone again and continued to read _Green Face_ her rights.

"ANYTHING YOU SAY CAN AND WILL BE USED AGAINST YOU IN A COURT OF LAW"

"?gnihtemos ro ezirp a teg to gnitcepxe uoy erew tahW !ekoj neddih eht dnuof ev'uoy ,snoitalutargnoC" she said grinning at them. Wiggum hadn't understood a word of that and as he looked at the other police officers around him expecting a translation they all looked as confused as he did. They couldn't use gibberish in a court of law, unless she was going to plead insanity.

"YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO SPEAK TO AN ATTORNEY. IF YOU CANNOT AFFORD AN ATTORNEY, ONE WILL BE APPOINTED TO YOU!" Wiggum then motioned with his hands for a couple of police officers to arrest her, they reluctantly left their barricade and slowly approached her up the stone porch with their revolvers aimed and loaded, another cop drew a pair of hand cuffs from his belt and held them in his free hand.

_Green Face _didn't look concerned or worried anymore in fact she looked like she getting bored with this, a big grin then started to grow on that rubber mask, a grin Wiggum didn't like the look of. He had after all been the first cop to come face to face with _Green Face_ he knew what she\he\it was capable of. As the cop with the hand cuffs knelt down to her level to place the cuffs on her waiting wrists _Green Face_ did not resist, she held out her hands and let the policeman cuff both her wrists together and he pressed the loops down to tighten them. But before he could release his grip on the loops she twisted one of her legs over her other and sent herself into another rapid Taz style spin and with the cop still holding onto her wrists he was caught up in it as well. He had no time to resist and he was forced off his feet into the whirl motion.

"Ring-a-ring-a-roses, a pocket full of posies, a tissue a tissue, we all fall down!" she sang in a very childish and ghostly type of voice that Wiggum had never _Green Face _use before.

The three cops who had climbed the porch with the other cop were slowly advancing towards the twister. Wiggum had no idea what they were going to do, police procedure did not include a scenario for rogue mini tornado attacks. Then Wiggum and everyone around him were taken completely by surprises when from the whirl of colour the police officer caught up in the twister was thrown from it and sped into those cops advancing towards her, forcing them to fall down to the ground and roll over each other down the steps of the porch until they landed in a heap on the floor.

The hostility of this action caused the one of the cops to fire his pointed weapon, an action that spooked the other cops into opening fire on her. Shot gun blasts, revolvers all kinds of weapons discharged and _Green Face _as Wiggum had expected, was taking every single shot. Bullets tore through her body and she didn't scream or flinch as if the feeling of millions of metal projectiles tearing through her small body wasn't even painful.

She didn't appear to be sustaining any damage either, though the bullets passed through her body the wounds quickly healed up leaving no blood or damage at all, it was as if her entire body was made of butter or something. Even her blood red dress was able to somehow fix the holes in its stitching.

The rain of bullets stopped as they all expended their first clips. The entire police force watched her in amazement, she was still standing, still alive after all that, all those guns, all those bullets had done nothing. She crossed her arms over her chest and giggled a little.

"That tickled" she said giggling as if that's all it really did. Then she opened her mouth and raised her right hand to it. From it she started pulling a long chain of what looked like a number of spent bullets from her gullet, ones which hadn't gone straight through her. It was about ten or so inches in length and appeared flexible as she held it, this was the most freaky thing Wiggum had ever seen in his life, it topped anything he'd seen _Green Face_ do the last time he saw her/him/it. She then put the spent bullets around her neck and was wearing them like a necklace.

"Thanks for the souvenir" she said grinning again "Here's a little something in return"

The rest of the squad rapidly began reloading their weapons ready for the order to fire again. Wiggum was going to wait for those police officers who'd just tried to cuff her to get away before he gave the real order to open fire. _Green Face_ was too dangerous to be taken alive, he decided, she'd/he'd/it'll have to be put down but if millions of hot projectiles wouldn't kill her then what could, and worse than that what did she\he\it have in store for them now?

The girl _Green Face_ held up her left hand and as if by magic she flicked up her other arm and a silver cigarette lighter flicked into existence in that hand.

The clicking of the reloading guns ceased telling Wiggum everyone was ready to fire again. But before he gave the order he wanted to give _Green Face_ another chance to come quietly, no one needed to be hurt after all, especially any of them.

He held up the megaphone to his mouth and said. "I'M GOING TO GIVE YOU ONE MORE CHANCE _GREEN FACE_, COME QUIETLY OR WE OPEN FIRE!"

The girl raised the silver lighter above her head and she clicked it, once, twice, three times, each time she clicked it, it sparked and a light went out somewhere and with each click another light died out, the lights in the mansion which still sounded like utter chaos was still ensuring in it went completely dark, the lights on their car's and their flashlights every source of light died out leaving them in almost total darkness, they were blind!

"Hey, that's cheating!" Wiggum whined before he shouted "Hold your fire!" to everyone in case they started firing their guns and hit each other.

"Ouch! Chief you just stood on my foot!" said Lou next to him.

"Lou!" Wiggum said with an edge of panic to his voice, they both knew what _Green Face_ was capable of and now the masked trouble maker had left them blind. "We can't see the target, what are we going to do?"

"You're the police chief!" Lou said.

"Lights!" shouted an echo-y unearthly voice.

A light flashed into life and everyone checked their aim and pointed at where it was coming from. But the beam of light apparently had no source because it appeared to come from miles in the night sky. But the other end of this light shaft was shining down to the ground where stood in the middle of it, surrounded by darkness was _Green Face_. Only she had somehow managed to chance her clothes in their brief moment of blindness. She was in a pretty looking pink dress with a bow in her spiky hair though she still wore that green face mask that clashed with it.

"Camera!" she raised her hand and in her hand she had a microphone which amplified her voice so it bellowed out from an unknown source. What the heck was she doing?

"CAAAAAANNNN... ANYBODYYYYYYYY..." she sang into the microphone, what was she doing? What was her angle? "FIND MEEEEeee... SOMEBODY TOOOOOoooooo..." and she broke into song.

"...LOOOOOOOOOOVE"

She then held that note in her throat and Wiggums brow lowered, confused at what he was witnessing. Was she going to attack them or sing songs by Queen? There were no bangs or loud noises from his fellow officer's guns so he guessed they couldn't understand this either. The next few minutes were filled with many odd things as the girl _Green Face_ continued to sing the rest of the song.

"I WORK HARD!"

"She works hard!" said many smaller squeaky voices as from behind her, folding out like a fan were a large collection of animals, squirrels, beavers, hedgehogs, chipmunks all kinds of rodents. They all spread out in front of _Green Face _and stood up on their hind legs with straight backs and it sounded like they, the animals were providing the backing vocals for this performance, and more so they looked like they were dancing slowly to the music in sync with each other.

"EVERY DAY OF MY LIFE, I WORK 'TILL I ACHE MY BONES AND AT THE END..."

"At the end of the day"

The animals raised their 'arms' and started waving them from side to side and formed a circle around _Green Face_ who spun around just once at a normal speed, she then raised her head as if she was speaking to the sky.

"I TAKE HOME MY HARD EARNED PAY ALL ON MY OWN"

The fury animals arranged themselves into neat lines and started to perform their own different dances. Wiggum just couldn't believe it himself but there were squirrels body popping, hedgehog's moon walking in a circle, beavers spinning rapidly on the top of their heads. It was impossible yet it was happening. _Green Face_ continued to sing her song.

"I GET DOWN ON MY KNEES AND I START TO PREY, 'TILL THE TEARS ROLL DOWN FROM MY EYES, LORD!"

"Find me somebody to love, find me somebody to love, find my somebody to love" the furry little animals stopped dancing and stood completely still as they sang this one line over and over, each time they repeated it their voices got slowly louder and louder, when it was loud enough they all started jumping in time to make a Mexican wave running from left to right. Wiggum knew all this sounded ridicules but that's what they were doing, their voices became even louder and louder and louder until they were all as loud as they could sing, then they stopped repeating the lines and both _Green Face_ and the animals sang.

"CAN ANYBODY FIND MEEEEEeeeee?" The animals remained silenced for this part while she rounded off the performance "SOMBODY TOooooo..." she paused to let that last note hang in the air.

"LOOOOOOVEEEEEE?"

She flung her arms out ending the performance and the last word of the song was held in the air for a few moments before everything became silent again. The masked girl stood there and smiled sweetly, something Wiggum didn't think the masked trouble maker was capable of. She looked like she was awaiting some sort of applause from her police audience, but she didn't get anything but dozens of gun barrels being re-aimed at her and re-cocked. Her face fell.

"Every bodies a critic" she said slowly to herself as she let her arms slowly drop to her sides in disgust, "Okay guys" she said looking down at the animals at her feet "sic 'em!"

Before any of the Springfield Police Force had a chance to fire their weapons the furry animals that had been singing with her leapt forward and began to attack every police officer on the ground.

"You only sing when you're winning!" _Green Face_ sang to herself as the animals started biting and ripping them apart.

Wiggum stood up and tried to get away as quickly as possible, there were only about two dozen animals singing with her but it was as if they were dividing becoming more and more and more as they crawled over each other, and them. Guns fired and went off but none of these creatures appeared to die as the bullets rang out and tore through them, like _Green Face_ they didn't appear to sustain any damage whatsoever.

As if on some silent command more small animals appeared from the doors of Burns mansion, forgetting about trashing the multimillion dollar mansion and instead came to join the battle.

Something smacked into Wiggums cap and broke with a soft crack, dripping over the side was a slimy clear substance followed by a yellow gloop, he wiped it away with his sleeve in case it went into his eyes and blinded him, and he didn't need to be blinded right now. He looked up into the sky to see the source of this.

"What the hel..." his words were cut short as something dropped into his open mouth. He didn't swallow it but stopped him uttering his curse word. He spat it out into his hands, it was round and white, it was an egg? Wiggum looked up again and saw in the sky were dozens of birds flying around above them, dozens of birds that were dropping eggs quickly and rapidly along their flight path over them like bombers on a bombing run.

Wiggum raised his arms above his head to shield himself from the falling egg projectiles that cracked and spurted their contents over the entire force.

Wiggum retreated to the back of the blockade as the furry animals crawled all over them, scratching and biting, but didn't appear to be inflicting any fatal wounds to the other officers.

As Wiggum stumbled backwards he heard a strange sort of whoosh followed by a vibrating type boing noise when you flick a ruler that's half over a desk. His instincts told him to turn and see what it was, and so he did. Standing next to him watching the carnage with her hands on her hips was _Green Face_. She was shorter then Wiggum remembered she only came up to his waist when, when he last met him/her/it, she was a he and he and about the same height as he was.

Wiggum took a few steps back and drew his gun and aimed it firmly at _Green Face_, she did not look impressed or intimidated. "Oh come on!" she said rolling her eyes "Can't you guys take a hint?"

Wiggum cocked the revolver and repaired to fire, he had a feeling it wasn't going to work but maybe if he aimed directly at the head then it might kill 'it', this time. But then a look of mischief cross the girls face. She gently and slowly knelt down and picked up a long broken twig at her feet. She bent it in her hands just enough so the stick bent but did not snap in two. Then she let it return to its usual straight form and started twirling it around and between her the fingers of her right hand. What was she doing?

In the next instant she let it drop into her hand, and she swung it out and pointed the narrower end at him with a strange sort of flourish like someone casting a spell.

"Expelliarmus!" she shouted. Wiggum felt his revolver pulled from his tight grasp as if someone had wrenched it from him. It rose into the air and landed in _Green Face_'s other, waiting hand. She opened the chamber and allowed all the bullets to gently drop from it before snapping it shut.

Wiggum took a step back, he was defenceless now, but as he retreated _Green Face_ did not make a move she did not advance towards him as he backed away, he was on the brink of turning and running when the girl pointed the stick like wand at him again with a flick and said "Accio, belt!"

Wiggum felt a strange sensation as the black belt around his waist unclipped, and was pulled from the loops in his trousers and shot towards the girl who caught it in her other waiting hand. Wiggum suddenly felt very cold from the waist down and with good reason, that belt was the only thing holding his pants up. He knelt down and pulled them back up and now had to hold them there.

_Green Face_ turned to look at the panic mass of cops who were deciding to abandon their posts and retreat as far away as they could, leaving their cars and running back up the drive while others bravely tried to help their fallen comrades.

"Let's not forget the lesson taught to this country in Vietnam" _Green Face_ said grinning broadly again "'War is hell', I know BUT ONLY WHEN YOU'RE LOSING! HAHA!"

When the _Green Face Girl_ was finished laughing she gave Wiggum a wave and said "Bye bye" before swinging her arms and began spinning on her red sandals, rotating so fast she was a blur and with the next moment as if she was fired from a catapult she shot forward, leapt over all of the retreating cops, passed through the metal gate and disappeared into the darkness.

Wiggum turned back to the sea of critters advancing closer and closer towards him, their numbers continuing to swell and with his hands buried deep in his pockets to stop his pants falling down around his ankles he shouted the only thing he could think of in this horrific moment.

"LET'S GET OUT OF HERE!"

* * *

They were gone, it was gone, all of it gone, all his possessions, most of them priceless, all of them irreplaceable, all of them, gone.

Mr. Burns walked slowly over the carpet, of which there was not much left after all the squirrels had eaten it away and what was left of it was a tangled mess with pottery shards mixed in from a priceless vase that now lay in pieces on the floor.

He gazed up at the wall of the main dining area which once held that controversial never before seen painting of the last supper by Leonardo Da Vinci, the one showing a woman at the table, the one the church had banned from public viewing. Burns used it to blackmail the church into giving him a tidy sum of their profit or else he'd publish the real thing and let everyone know _the Da Vinci code_ wasn't total fiction.

But it was now gone, destroyed, ripped to shreds, the world would never know the true origins of Christ and worse than that, Burns wouldn't be able to blackmail the church anymore. It was a disaster.

He had been sitting in the dining area having supper at the time when this all started. The large table was full of food from several different chiefs. He didn't have the stomach to eat all of it, he could barely manage anything the size of a grape fruit a meal but he just liked having his dozens of private chiefs toil away all night on something that was going to be wasted in the end, and often the chief who's food he did taste Burns would claim the food was terrible and fire him before moving on to the next unlucky chief.

Mr. Smithers, his assistant had been there, helping him chew his food by guiding his mouth when he put something in it. This was something he'd taken a liking to when his jaw used to keep dislocating when he opened his mouth too far and Smithers had to guide his jaws when they did. That was until all his highly paid paramedics and doctors arrived to reset it. His jaws were cured now but he just liked inflicting unpleasant jobs on people. He was rich, he was bored, and he wanted to be entertained by the less well of, so sue him. In fact sue him and all his twelve overly paid lawyers would counter sue for every penny you owned.

There had been a knock at the front door, light at first but when no one was answering it kept coming and coming, getting louder and louder as if someone was in desperate trouble. Annoyed Burns orders Smithers to "See who it is, then release the hounds on them"

Smithers then left to see who was at the door. Burns doubted if Smithers would've released the hounds if the situation had been different. He was weak like that, he'd often considered firing him but only Smithers knew how to guide his jaws to help him chew his food.

It was as he sat in the big dining room, a house long table covered with food he didn't intend to eat that he heard a tapping noise from the opposite window. He'd turned, expecting to see that blasted tree again blowing in the wind constantly tapping on his window. Trees, even here he had trees but at least they were 'controlled' unlike how they were in the forest. Tap, tap, tap, he'd have that unruly one cut down.

But the noise wasn't made by a tree branch, tap, tap, tap, tap. Burns' jaw dropped, dislocated and fell further. The tapping was being made by a hand, a skeletal hand attached to a tall man in a dark cloak that cast his face in shadow, in his other hand he held a long, very sharp scythe that glinted a little as if to indicate how sharp it was. It was Death, Death himself, he raised his skeleton hand again and pointed directly at him and a shiver went up Burns' spine.

At first he thought this was a joke and, he pushed his jaw back into place and was going to call for Smithers or someone to release the hounds when, to his disbelief, the black cloaked figure took a step forward and passed through the glass as if it was made of thin air. The glass clung to him as he passed through and then snapped back into its proper place once he was a good distance into the room.

Burns had yelped in surprise, jumped out of his seat and backed away as the figure slowly came closer raising that bone white hand and pointed directly at him again, just one touch from that figure and Burns knew he would drop down dead. In shock Burns tripped over his own feet as he tried to back away and fell to the ground on his back, but this didn't stop him from retreating as he crawled further away from Death on his back until he was pressing himself against the far wall.

Burns had been so frightened he actually felt a pain in his chest, a searing pain that faded then came back, faded then came back, bupbum, bupbum, bupbum, it took him a second to realise the shock of seeing Death had jump started his static heart which was now beating furiously, almost at five beats a minute.

Wait a minute, he remembered something. He wasn't supposed to die yet because he'd made a pact.

"What are you doing here so early?" he shouted as if he was talking to a lazy incompetent worker from his nuclear plant, all the fear had drained from him... most of it... a little... some of it to be replaced by anger "I made a deal with the Prince of Darkness himself, I provide a blood sacrifice on every full moon and I get an extra year of life!"

But the figure hadn't paid any attention to this and kept advancing. It wasn't until Deaths cloak got caught on the arm of his high backed chair did he realise this wasn't the real Death. The cloak slid off a little girl, a girl of no older then say ten years of age who was standing on a pair of long wooden stilts, she was wearing a thick green rubber mask on her face and was holding the elbows of long plastic skeleton arms in her hands, one of which was clamped tightly around the scythe.

"What...?" Burns said taken by surprise "...who the devil are you?"

The girl had leapt off her stilts, landed on the ground and was up close to him before he could blink. He heard a clattering noise as the skeleton arms, stilts and scythe fell to the floor.

"Ever heard of euthanasia?" she'd said, her voice echoed with a ghostly sound "Of course you have. Half the people of this town are willing to offer you it!" She'd said grabbing Burns by the collar of his suit and pulling him close to her face, a classic attempt at intimidation.

"Now listen carefully Gollum!" she'd said "If you haven't been reading the papers or watching the news on TV then listen up, I am what the police call _Green Face_, I am a very dangerous vigilante and I've been fighting against the oppressive rule and destruction of the forest of Springfield and of its inhabitants by the Dark Lord, 'he who must not be named' namely, YOU!" she shouted this last word at him.

Even then Burns admitted something was very odd about this girl, and at the same time something very familiar that he just couldn't put his finger on. Burns had grabbed the girl's arms and tried to push her away but her grip was so tight he couldn't do it, he was a weak man he admitted, he once had a tug of war with a baby over a stuffed bear and lost that challenge as well, but that didn't stop him trying.

"I should be allowed to cut down as many trees as I want!" he insisted angrily, this was a child after all and children could be intimidated easily by shouting at them. But a chill went up his bent spine when he saw the girls red irises start to glow a creepy, menacing shade of crimson. That was when he was certain this was no ordinary girl.

Another shiver ran up his spine from this memory that had happened not too long ago, at first he thought the Prince of Darkness had gone back on his deal and decided to take Burns now. But of course that was wrong because he was still here now, but his things weren't. He slowly walked through the destruction of the living room his footsteps echoing around the empty walls. The chairs stitching had been chewed and the padding ripped out, his old gramophone was mangled and destroyed, the large device that nearly filled the opposite wall that today's youths called a _flat screen plasma TV_ had been ripped from the wall and stolen.

She had called herself _Green Face_ but he assumed _Green Face_ was a man... or was it a boy? Burns had of course heard of _Green Face_, the troublemaker who'd attacked the fat lazy Springfield Police Chief then destroyed a school in Springfield. Burns thought this guy might be his sort of fellow until he'd turned the other cheek and attacked his 'tear down Springfield forest and turn it into a giant car park' plan, now it looked like he –now a she- had turned her attention to him. He frowned as he started replying the memory again.

With little effort she had pushed him away from her and he landed on the ground with little or no damage to his brittle bones.

He looked up at those glowing, crimson, angry eyes, it seemed the brighter they glowed the darker the room he was in became.

"Of course you know..." she said, her brow raising and her mouth grinning with a set of large, white teeth "...this means War!"

The next few moments were a nightmarish whirl. She'd flung out her arms and all the windows and doors flung open by themselves as if by magic, he'd heard doors open all around his mansion and from the open windows in the dining room he saw animals and birds of all different species climbing through flooding the room with chirps and squeaks.

All the animals had lined up and stood on their hind legs like a platoon at attention. _Green Face_ walked slowly towards them and marched up and down their ranks like a general inspecting her miniature troops.

"Okay guys remember, I want a good clean fight, nothing below the belt and..." she turned and looked directly into Burns eyes, her own still glowing "Don't bite until you see the whites of their eyes" then came the last word "CHARGE!" The animals began their attack.

The animals didn't attack him however they just started trashing his mansion, eating his food and destroying his possessions.

Burns sighed as he stepped on another piece of broken pottery that audibly cracked and splintered into even more tiny pieces. He detested his current situation even more when he took another step forward and stepped into something squishy and knew he'd just stepped into a pile of the animals 'business' that they had left behind.

That's what the animals did to him they'd uprooted his stuff and either destroyed it or took it with them leaving behind nothing but their spare fur, waste and the stuff they didn't want, which wasn't much. He never knew a time when he was so depressed in his life, okay he still had all his money in several banks of the world but it couldn't replace the sentimental value of the items he had. Like the skeleton of Adolf Hitler with the bullet hole in the skull which was hanging in the games room where Burns played Risk, now the skeleton had been taken down and munched on and defecated on by squirrels. The flag and decorations that once draped over Hitler's office, ripped to shreds by beavers. The revolver owned by General Custers' -the real one not the fake one in the museum- the one that had been used by Custer when he massacred thousands of peace loving, hippy Indians, stolen.

The clothes of King Henry the VIII of England who murdered two of his wives when they didn't bare him a male heir, gone, the original knife of Jack the Ripper, the last missing link in existence, the one he shot and had stuffed so he had something to act as a door stop, gone. The original intelligence report and plans of the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbour dated several months before the attack, the report that confirmed America chose to ignore and do virtually nothing about the impending attack so they had an excuse to enter World War 2, ripped to shreds.

Even the missing page from the front of the Holy Bible, gone, and it was something else Burns was able to blackmail the church for. It was genuine of course and had only one line written on it but it could've really blown the lid off the entire Christian religion because it read, 'Dear reader, all characters portrayed in this book are entirely fictions and any resemblance to anyone alive or dead is purely coincidental' All of this stuff was sentimental to him and now it was all lost.

He sat down on the foot of the large staircase and held his hands in face. He began to think, think about what he was doing to the forest. He was tearing down trees, stealing them and leaving nothing behind but the waste from the job. It was almost exactly the same as what's happened here, tonight with him, the animals had destroyed and stolen his possessions and left nothing behind but their stinking stale crap and the stuff they didn't want.

"They've taken everything and I've got nothing" Burns said sulkily

"You've still got me sir" said a voice, Smithers, this made Burns all the more depressed as his assistant came over and sat down next to him on the step of the large staircase. Where the heck was he while all this was going on? But Burns felt too depressed to ask.

"Smithers, I don't believe in suicide..." Burns said sighing and slowly he turned towards his assistant a sad hopeful expression in his eyes "...but it might cheer me up if you were to try."

**

* * *

**

**To Be Continued...**

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**Authors notes: **Originally Lisa was going to return to the restarted logging site and destroy it again, but after writing it (I wrote it with chapter 13) I decided it offered nothing new, so I scrapped it recycled it and wrote it so Lisa went after Burns instead.

Lisa singing 'Somebody to Love' by Queen was inspired by the 'Confused **dot** com' advert which was very similar.

The 'Bad Boys' joke had been done in Chapter 11 but in this instance Lisa was using it herself to mock the police force.

I admit the last joke was lifted from the very end of the Simpsons Movie, but I just thought it fitted in really well here.

The song 'Somebody to Love' was written and preformed by Queen, no copyright infringement is intended and the few lyrics that were used were meant in humour.

Hope you enjoyed the chapter.


	16. Schizophrenia

**Anonymous Review replies**

**To the Jokerman**, Hey there Jokerman, sorry but this is the only way I can reply to your review since there was no e-mail address attached to it. Nice to hear your enjoying the story and yeah, I've provided a few little nods to the original Mask comics here and there, however you are mistaken about Lisa's song (which I assume you mean the twisted lullaby from chapter 13 –or 14 if you count the prologue as 1-) it was never in the Mask comic books it was something I wrote for the story.

Hope you enjoy the new Chapter

Cheers

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**Author's notes:** I'd just like to remind the readers that I do not claim that the opinions and thoughts of the characters in any way reflect my own, thank you.

-Enjoy

* * *

**Chapter 15**

**Schizophrenia**

Springfield forest was very dark and silent this night, that was until Lisa showed up jangling the stolen goods she'd swiped from Mr. Burns. She had never felt so pleased with herself in her life as she strutted through the forest like she owned the place, and in her current state of mind she did.

She was pleased because she'd given Burns a taste of his own medicine, now he knew what it felt like to have millions of hairy creatures turn up and trash your home without any thought for the creatures that resided there and as a bonus she even made a bit of a profit out of it because over her right shoulder was a long wooden pole about 40 feet in length with a large red and white poke-a-dotted handkerchief tied in a bulb at the end. From the small gaps where the corners of it were tied together poked the dull edges of an assortment of objects she'd stolen from the 'Gollum double'. Gold trophies, VCR's –that appeared unused- a giant plasma screen TV and a few bars of solid gold that Burns had been using as a footstool, all now resided inside the large handkerchief bulb over her shoulder.

Behind her trailed several small animals all carrying more things on their backs, like the stuffed beaver, an old grandfather clock, and an assortment of other valuable looking antiques. But now they'd stolen the stuff, Lisa had no idea what to do with it. She didn't want to keep the creepy looking antiques that looked like they belonged in the middle ages, nor did she want what was basically a stale beaver that had gone past its sell by date either, nor the outdated VCR's but she wouldn't mind keeping the large plasma screen TV only she knew it would never fit in her room, or any room in their house so reluctantly she decided it would have to go as well.

She didn't concern herself with this problem at the moment, nor did she allow herself to think that she had broken the fourth Commandment 'thou shalt no steal' or that stealing this stuff technically made her a thief and a criminal, she didn't care and why should she? It wasn't as if someone was going to punish her.

As she slowly walked the air mysteriously started to fill with music, music that sounded very mystical. She was on top of the world and she had a song in her heart, a song she was about to sing.

"I was born in the wagon of a travelling show

My Mama used to dance for the money they throw

Papa would do whatever he could"

She stopped and let the wooden pole swing off her right shoulder so it stood perpendicular to the ground, the red handkerchief tied to the end swung without spilling its contents.

"Preach a little gospel

Sell a couple bottles of Dr. Good"

She swung the pole around onto her left shoulder as she continued to walk and sing

"Gypsies, tramps and thieves

We hear it from the people of the town

They call us

Gypsies, tramps and thieves

But every night all the men would come around

And lay their money down"

The music faded, that's as far as Lisa was allowed to go without Cher trying to sue for copyright breaches.

She smiled again at the memories of what she's done tonight, because she'd done more than just rob Mr. Burns, oh no she'd done much more. After her Robin Hood act she and her animal accomplices had returned to the logging site with the intent of driving out the loggers again and caused as much mayhem as possible. If Burns didn't take their little chat seriously then the re-destruction of the logging site would convince him, because after all 'actions speak louder than words'.

It was a completely different workforce there this time, apart from that fat idiot, the boss whom she saw previously when she attacked, the one she remembered was called Derek. He was still wearing that ridicules red plaid shirt and jeans held up by braces, a typical looking lumberjack. The workforce of course like last time tried to resist her but soon they realised she was no push over.

She'd started off by simply appearing and announcing her presence to the fat boss Derek but not to any other person. It was amusing to watch the worried look creep over his face as he looked and in panic point her, only for her to vanish and reappear somewhere out of sight as soon as the other workers turned to look.

The intention of this little trick was to make people think Derek was mad, cracking up, an illusion she carried on with appearing only were Derek could see her then moving away when he tried to get the other workers and security men to look. This had been fun for a while but what was really hilarious to her was how he acted when, while he had his back to her, she'd snuck up close behind him, put her mouth close to his left ear and spoke softly in her spooky ghostly voice.

"Only you can hear my voice!" at which point he tensed up and started to turn white, he yelped out loud and she vanished again before anyone caught sight of her. She spent a few minutes trying to hold back her laughter as Derek made a scene and a complete ass of himself.

After a while Derek's partner or second in command or whatever suggested he go lay down or take a break. Which he did, a quick coffee break then a trip to a small chemical toilet at the very edge of the site. That's when Lisa got another brilliantly mischievous idea, one worthy of Bart Simpson himself. With the powers of Loki at her fingertips she raced through the logging site moving so fast no one was able to even notice her, picked up a tube of quick drying adhesive or super glue, returned to the portable toilet and glued the lock shut. Then she disappeared behind the portable toilet and waited for the perfect opportunity.

Derek sounded stressed from the way he was moaning and muttering "There is no demon girl, there is no demon girl, there is no demon girl" trying to convince himself she wasn't real. Lisa felt a little insulted by that. When he was done with the toilet and... god he'd really stunk the place out! She'd thought as she picked up a clothes peg from nowhere and jammed it firmly on her nose as Derek tried the door but of course it was jammed shut.

"Hey!" he'd shouted as he hammered on the door "It's stuck!"

Lisa pulled herself up to the small grills set in at the very top and with the clothes peg still over her nose blocking out the smell she said in as creepy and bone chilling a voice as she could make. "The doors jammed..." she paused while Derek registered her presence, he fell silent and she continued "...trapping you in an airless, windowless coffin for all eternity!"

Derek screamed and she giggled out loud like a lunatic as he repeatedly rammed his shoulder against the door until it burst open and he fell to the ground and into the wet mud with a loud plop.

"Do NOT go in there!" she said as she finally revealed herself to Derek and everyone else, she placed a gas mask onto her face as she closed the door. "This thing is a biohazard waiting to happen! Good thing you used a portal toilet. Honestly, if that 'thing' ever got into the harbour it'd be a danger to shipping!"

That's when things had turned ugly and the workers advanced on her. That's also when she decided to unleash the big one, the H bomb, the thing that would make sure they never came back and would add a little more to her performance. She used the powers of the Mask to make the trees come to life, though life wasn't the best word for it more like she manipulated their form so they behaved like they were alive and made them creepy looking like the ornaments on Halloween, only with arms and legs like the Ents from 'Lord of the Rings'. Basically she used the trees like puppets and made the forest look like it was haunted.

It worked like a charm, every single worker on the site ran scared from this old Scooby Doo trick especially when the trees tried to reach out and grab them or when the Ents stomped on their machines and trailers and stuff. The workers all ran for their lives especially Derek how had gone a very pale and sickly shade of white.

They'd better not come back because if they did she was only too glad to provide a repeat performance again. She smiled again at the memory, this had been a rich full night of laughs, of fun, of terror, of mischief.

She had now decided what exactly they were going to do with the stolen goods, destroy them. She had no use for them after all and the plasma TV was useless unless she could enlarge her own bedroom so it would fit.

Once they were deep enough into the wood she opened up her pole and handkerchief thing and tipped the Plasma TV and the VCR's, everything onto a pile on the ground, and all the other animals, including rabbits, squirrels, hedgehogs, beavers and even foxes and wolves all piled the loot they were carrying on top of her pile.

She produced the silver lighter again, a representation of the 'Deluminator' from the Harry Potter books down to the last detail. She was just about to light the pile and burn the junk when she hesitated. She reached into the pile and removed the half dozen bars of solid gold she'd stolen and started juggling them in her hands. This stuff could trace the robbery right to her if she kept them and they were discovered she realised, but the part of her that thought this was overshadowed by her greed no doubt in no small part due to the Mask's influence on her.

She pulled open a pocket in her dress that appeared to be far too small for a six gold bars and allowed each and every one to fall inside. Amazingly all six entered the small pocket without so much as making a dent in her dress as the powers of Loki allowed her to warp reality to her will.

She closed and gently patted the pocket as she returned to her original plan, the destruction of evidence. She flipped open the top of the silver lighter device and pointed it at the pile of objects. She clicked it and a massive jet of flame shout out from the end of it like a flamethrower burning the electronic gadgets, junk and all the flammable stuff.

The animals sat there and watched the bright fire light, which was so bright they all produced a pair of sunglasses for themselves to wear and perched them on their noses in front of their eyes, all ridicules but possible, courtesy of the Mask of Loki. When the flames vanished only a small collection of ash was all that remained of their stolen goods.

The last of the small flames vanished and died as Lisa lifted the silver 'de-luminantor' up to her lips and gently blew on it, like it was a gun she'd been firing.

She turned back to her partners in crime. "My friends" she said opening her arms wide so they knew she was addressing all of them. "We have won a massive victory in the name of Mother Nature, now go, go and be free, your homes are safe from the taint of human progress for now and you can all live together in peace at last."

All the animals amazingly burst into applause at this, clapping their paws together in appreciation of what Lisa has done for them, okay it was really Lisa manipulating them to applaud like this, forcing them to perform an action they had no clue how to make but it was still a nice gesture. Lisa of course bowed and curtsied at her adoring fans before sending herself into a spin and vanishing away into the night leaving the animals to get along with each other. Though she failed to realise that as she left them, so did her spell over them. The animals stood there for a moment looking at each other, all different species, some large, some small, some herbivores, others carnivores. The foxes and wolves she had drafted into her group snarled at the promise of an early breakfast as the smaller animals tried to escape. But Lisa did not anticipate or notice this as she left.

Spinning away from her friends Lisa's thoughts now turned to 'what should I do now? What chaos can I cause now? What truth can I fight for?'

Help out the animal shelter? The mayor was threatening to close it down and turn it into an 'Adult Amusement centre' or even the orphanage on east Springfield, which needs money urgently to feed the starving kids –she suddenly regretted her hasty act of destroying all that valuable stuff she'd stolen when she could've given it to the orphanage-, what about the homeless, she could help them.

All those selfless thoughts suddenly became derailed and started to shift towards something more selfish to her. She suddenly remembered being pretty P. at Ned Flanders, the Simpsons' religious neighbour and devout Christian. Usually he'd be the last person she'd go after because, though he was pretty boring and could talk you to sleep, he'd once tried to force Springfield to adopt the bibles creationism version of the beginning of the universe -of which there was no proof- when he found out the town thought the bible version –which he believed in 100%- was a only a myth. The town taking an interest in the bible she was fine with, it was probably good for them, but it was when they'd thrown out Darwin's theory of Evolution –for which there was tones of evidence- on the grounds that it went against creationism and no such animal called _the missing link_ could ever be found. Had they ever seen her Dad... or George W. Bush for that matter? She rested her case. But eventually after watching Homers ape like display the town had agreed to readopt evolution as the way man and the universe was born.

Though she had made her peace with Flanders she was still pretty P. at him for his 'if it goes against the bible then it is wrong and should be utterly abolished' attitude. Evolution went against the creationist belief and for that reason it was wrong? That's as ridicules as saying 'Obama is a bad US leader because he's black!' or that 'Michael Jackson was a child molester because he slept in the same bed as his own kids' or, 'that Amy Winehouse is a well known and successful singer, so she must be pretty!' all thoughts made by narrow minded people with more teeth then brain cells.

In Lisa's mind creationists were just sad, sulking members of the 'God Squad' who detest that science had advanced beyond the bible leaving Christianity in its dust. So they try to manipulate the findings in science to support their half baked theories and preach them to the dull witted and the stupid in an attempt to chain science up like a criminal and bring it back into line with the bible.

This was just one of the many reasons she converted to become a Buddhist, because Christianity just seemed so corrupt to her. Even Reverend Lovejoy was a little money grubber who just stood in front of thousands of people and just dully talked at them and wasn't very much help when people came to him about their problems to confess. All of this convinced her that Christianity had lost the plot and if there was a path to god, then as far as she was concerned Christianity was not the path to him, or indeed her.

As she spun around and around in her own little, fast moving twister, her anger starting to back up in her mind, at this moment she didn't care that all this repressed rage starting to come to the surface was making her a very bad Buddhist, she didn't care, right now she wanted a release for it, she felt like a volcano primed to burst as these memories started to flash before her. She was aware her body was slowly turning a deep shade of red as all this backed up behind her and the effect on her tornado form made her look like a swirling red whirlpool of light.

She hated Bart, she hated Sideshow Bob, she hated Mr. Burns –who didn't-, she hated single minded, ignorant creationists, she hated the mayor, she hated the government, she hated politicians, she hated Matt Smith as Doctor Who, she hated pot noodles, she hated burnt toast, she hated pork chops and lamb chops and any type of meat product from a dead animal.

More memories flooded her cranium, all of Bart's nasty pranks flashed before her eyes, all her misfortunes, all those filthy companies who wouldn't pay attention to her when she preached the environmentalist message. She gritted her teeth. All long forgotten memories suddenly started flashing in front of her.

Was this because she was wearing the Mask? She wondered as another image of Milhouse appeared, why wouldn't he leave her alone? Cherry and Terry, the twins at Springfield Elementary who'd once made fun of her calling her large Lisa because they thought she was fat.

She was going to make them pay, oh boy would she make them pay, starting with those two faced creationists. They wouldn't stop preaching their rubbish and wouldn't pay attention or acknowledge the argument of science just because it conflicted with their views, they out right refused to believe what was true and correct, well she would show them!

'_You're only upset because they don't believe as you do'_ said a voice in her head.

Lisa ignored this voice, what the heck was it anyway? It was the same voice that kept speaking to her, the one that had tried to get her to sit down and calmly study after putting Maggie and Bart to bed. She decided not to answer it, speaking to yourself was the first sign of madness and she wasn't mad! Oh no, it was the rest of the world that was mad! She was the only sane one on the planet and she needed to make the rest of the world as sane as she is, by force if necessary!

'_Isn't that what you claim creationists are doing?'_ It said again '_Bending people to their way of thinking, only in their case it's more subtle.'_

_Shut up!_ She thought as she decided to come to a complete stop as if this would clear her head. She listened intently for that voice to speak again but could hear nothing in her head now, no little voice telling her what to do. Why was it speaking to her now? The first time she'd worn the Mask she never heard that little voice in her head so why was it speaking now?

She listened for a moment, waiting for it to speak but all she could hear was the light rustle of some trees and the gently howl of the wind between the branches. Lisa took a step forward and her foot landed in something mushy and soft. She lifted her foot up and found an old, damp news paper discarded in the forest. She hated litter bugs she thought as she removed the paper from her foot and as she looked around she realised there wasn't just a news paper dumped here. The place was covered with litter, old beer cans, old potato chip packets, old foil food containers. It was a mess!

Why is it people just saw a place of natural beauty as a dumping ground or a giant trash can for their finished snacks and drinks and anything else they're finished with, it made her so angry.

"_Don't do it"_ said that voice in her head again. What the hell was it and who's side was it on? She'd have to ask Mom and Dad to take her to a doctor sometime to see about fixing these weird voices. Mom and Dad! She'd completely forgotten about them! They'd be back soon and if she wasn't in her bed then...

All other thoughts, including that annoying voice were driven from her mind. She had to get back before Mom and Dad found out she was missing, but she'd been out all night surely her parents would've returned the moment they found out the whole garden show was a fake, and when they found her missing from her bedroom they would've alerted the police who probably wouldn't do anything but Lisa would have to answer some very awkward questions from her parents when she returned home, questions she wasn't certain she could invent particularly good lies to. Homer would probably fall for it, he'd fall for anything but Mom wouldn't be so easy to fool.

As she walked she became aware of a small manmade structure in front of her. She came to a stop when she saw it and slowly started creeping towards the tall object and as she entered a clearing she found it was a big, dirty looking, tall plastic box. It was another portable chemical toilet like the kind used at that logging site she'd deviated a few hours ago but this one was half buried in the soil, tilted back at a shallow angle and was very dirty.

_Of course_, she thought, this must've been left over from the last logging site, after she had trashed it. She looked back at the litter and also made the connection that the waste must've come from her destroying the site. Though as she realised she was actually the litterbug who caused all this mess and that she should hate herself she didn't register any form of regret attached to the memory or to her actions, but was sure she would when or if she chose to return to normal.

She was going to pull out a large slingshot from the confines of reality and launch this abandoned chemical heap in front of her point blank at Burns' mansion, just for the fun of it when another idea occurred to her.

She grinned as a possibility occurred to her, one that could get her home quick as a flash but would it work? Well only one way to find out she reasoned as she went up to the chemical toilet, opened the door and stepped inside slamming the door behind her.

For a few moments nothing happened, then door opened again and Lisa stepped out. From the folds of reality she produced a small orange warning light, like the ones on top of emergency vehicles. Her arms stretched out like they were made of elastic and she placed the light on the roof, dead centre of the portable toilets top before her arms retracted back towards her. She then re-entered the portable toilet and was about to slam the door shut again, but hesitated. She turned back and said to no one in particular. "Now, this is going to be one giant stretch of plausibility" then she slammed the door, locked it.

The orange light she'd placed on top began to flash on and off to a weird type of noise, it sounded like a flushing toilet only it changed in pitch becoming louder then softer, louder then softer in time with the orange flashing light and using the Mask to warp the fabric of reality Lisa commanded the dirty portable toilet to not only dematerialise away from this place but to also re-materialise in another location.

* * *

Miles away a bright orange light flashed in mid air singling the arrival of a dirty, plastic, portable chemical toilet which faded into existence just outside the Simpson household next to Santa's Little Helpers dog house. Once it had solidified completely a gurgling noise came from it, like a sink that had just been emptied of water. Lisa unlocked the door, stepped out and closed it behind her and dusted herself down. "Surprisingly roomy" she said, she never expected that to work, what wasn't this Mask capable of?

"Move over, Doctor Who! I've got a portable potty that can cross the vortex!" she said smiling as she spun around to view the portable toilet with an orange lamp on the top and flung her arms out as if she were presenting it to an audience "and I shall call it..." she paused for effect "... the TURDIS."

Grinning at her joke she entered the Simpsons house through the back door and made her way through the TV room, into the living room and looked outside at the drive. Mom and Dad's car was nowhere to be seen, so they hadn't arrived home yet, so she still had some time to make a mock up of herself she can put in her bed. She knew Mom at least checked on them after going out and leaving a babysitter to take care of them to make sure they were okay. So if Lisa wanted to stay out all night she'd have to make some sort of dummy good enough to fool her.

She left the living room and stopped before going up the stairs. Still standing in the dining area snoring softly with a look of serenity about him was Grandpa Simpson. He hadn't moved since she left him hours ago and he was still in a blissful sleep. Grandpa had slept through Sideshow Bob's attack, slept through the Masked baby, through the Masked dog and even slept through the Bob vs. Lisa confrontation. She had the sudden urge to pull out a horn and blow it loudly at him to see if that would wake him, but she resisted it on the grounds that the shock might kill him.

She smiled when she remembered one of Grandpa's rants about how 'the young whipper-snappers of this day and age don't respect authority, they go around painting their names into the walls without any consideration of the elderly. The military and a military national service would straighten them out.' He'd once said. _Yeah right_, thought Lisa, basically he's saying '_take the countries__ antisocial, violent teenager population causing mayhem on the streets… and teach them how to kill people!'_

A flash of light came, passing across the window and Lisa turned towards it, sitting in the driveway with its headlights lit was a purple car with a damaged wheel arch on the right hand side. That was Mom and Dad's car! They were back and she hadn't made a mock up yet, the soft rumble of the engine died and the lights faded away, they were coming.

With lighting fast speed -literal lightning fast speed- Lisa had rushed up the stairs and quickly checked on Bart. He looked like he was asleep and quickly without waking him she removed the belts she'd conjured up to strap him into his bed, evidence after all. She then rushed into her own bedroom and quickly replaced the loose floor board, the carpet and her computer that had acted as the Masks hiding place hours previously. She heard the click of a key in the lock and the gentle creek of the front door opening.

She hadn't forgotten anything had she? She wondered as she clambered into bed and pretended to be asleep. Suddenly she snapped her finger and smacked her own head as a really obvious thing she'd forgotten to fix. She rushed up to the mirror and looked at her reflection. If Mom found her with this face on she'd freak, _nothing for it_, she thought, she'd have to adopt a disguise for this guise. She pulled on her green face and spiky hair so they stretched outwards a little like a rubber band then let the whole thing snap back into place.

In that instant you'd have been forgiven for thinking she'd removed the Mask because her face, eyes and hair had returned to their normal colour and shape, but the Mask was nowhere to be seen because she was still technically wearing it.

She took a second to check the disguise of her guise. She could've made things easier by removing the Mask anyway but she doubted very much once she was back to normal that Lisa/Lisa would allow herself to put it back on again.

Convinced that the disguise could fool everyone she gently climbed back into her bed as she heard footsteps slowly climb the stairs. All she had to do was pretend to be asleep, wait for them to go to bed and then she was free to do whatever she pleased for the rest of the night.

* * *

The car pulled up the drive and came to a stop, the headlights flicked off as Homer and Marge Simpson got out of the battered purple car.

They'd been out all night trying to get to this convention centre where they'd won the best Garden competition or something like that, Marge was too tired to think of what its official name was, and it hardly mattered because the entire competition had been a big fake, a silly joke. Now early in the morning they were arriving back home after a night fraught with mishaps and accidents.

First was when the car started acting up halfway across town, it had started after stopping at a red light that had stayed red for some time before it finally turned green, but as they set off the car was suddenly sluggish. Homer had buried his foot in the accelerator but the battered vehicle refused to get above 30mph and as the engine revved like it was in pain the smell of burning caught their nostrils and Marge told Homer to pull over which he did after a little more nagging.

Homer got out and checked for flat tyres and even popped the hood to look inside, but had stupidly put his hands on the hot engine. He'd screamed and rolled around on the ground blowing on his burnt hand before attempting the problem again with a pair of gloves Marge had found in the glove box. This time Homer opened the radiator and the sudden release of pressure from the boiling water shot out and caught Homer in the face, he'd screamed again.

Eventually Marge convinced Homer to try to phone for a breakdown service but his cell phone battery was flat and Marge didn't have a cell because she spent most of her time in the kitchen within reach of a phone anyway. So Homer had to run, more trot or walk back home to phone for the breakdown service. He'd been gone for an hour or so while she listened to the cars old radio that Homer had bought cheaply off a dealer in a yard sale, cheap because it was faulty, it worked but you could only ever listen to the station 'it' wanted to listen to and even when you tuned it back to your station the thing just flipped back over to its own choice.

When Homer finally returned to the car he'd explained that he'd phoned for the breakdown services, but then he asked her 'not to be afraid' he said as if something serious had happened back at the house, that tension knot dissolved when he explained he thought their home was being haunted by 'Slimer' that ghost from Ghostbusters. Marge had expressed how ridicules this sounded but Homer refused to listen.

They waited for another 30 minutes for the breakdown service to arrive until Homer started to get impatient wanting to be at that party and was worried he was missing out on the buffet. When his patience was at its thinnest he started the car and tried to drive off with the car still in its sluggish condition that struggled to get up to any sort of speed as Homer pressed down fully on the accelerator. Marge could hear the engine revving madly as it inched along the road at 10 mph, and it was as Marge looked over at the speed gage in front of Homer that she noticed something. She reached forward and took the 'hand break' off and the car suddenly shot forward picking up speed rapidly and the revving engine quietened down.

"Hehe" Homer said in triumph not noticing that Marge had released the hand break he'd left on "All you got to do is show these things who's boss." He'd said patting the cars dash affectionately, Marge only lightly moaned at him for his unobservant behaviour. The car had rushed through the night to get to the convention centre and by that time they arrived they were already three hours late.

Marge got the impression something was wrong the moment they pulled into the car park, though Homer just told her she was being a 'worry wart' but it was the fact that the car park was completely deserted and the entire place was closed down and locked up for the night, is what got her suspicions up. She'd wondered if they had come to the right place but Homer was certain this was the correct address as he checked the invitation that, Marge was only now starting to notice, was written on very flimsy looking paper. They'd left the car and walked up to the front door, it was locked. Homer banged and called out for someone to let them in but no one came.

Marges hope of a night out were at that point fading fast, there had been a mistake somewhere she knew it but Homer refused to say 'no' and decided the other guests were hiding like how "some people do on a surprise birthday party" he'd said.

She'd explained to him how ridicules this sounded but he refused to listen to her as they circled the building looking for an entrance that was open.

It was when Homer saw the chain link fence covering the back alley that another accident happened. Homer had attempted to climb it, without Marge's consent, and fell straight back onto the hard ground hands bleeding because he'd failed to notice the top was covered in barbed wire.

After about an hour of this someone did eventually come to open the front doors, by this time it was 4:00am and Homer refused to leave until he got his reward. The man was tall and rather muscular looking and was dressed like a night watchman or security guard.

"About time!" Homer had yelled at the guard "Do you know how long we've been out here?"

The security guard didn't look like he understood why they were there and so Homer showed him the invitation to the party and the promise of a reward, then demanded he be pointed to the nearest buffet table where, no doubt to Marge, he'd make a scene of himself by rapidly eating everything on the entire buffet table. But as the guard looked at the invitation his serious, stone like face cracked into a smile, then he burst out laughing, Homer looked confused.

"Is this some kind of hidden camera show?" said the guard laughing.

"Listen buddy" Homer said aggressively, poking the guard in the chest "We've been out here in the dark and cold for hours, I want my reward!"

"Sir the place is closed" he'd said in a firm voice that still had that hint of amusement "there is no reward and there is no lawn competition being held here and..." he then took the invitation from Homer and felt its flimsy texture in his hands "...this invitation is printed on toilet paper."

Homer's face looked confused and hurt and at first he said nothing as he took this all in, after a full solid minute Homer finally said something "But... but... but... I won a prize" Homer said in a soft moan as humiliation caught up with him.

"I think you've been had" said the guard who handed back the fake invitation. "Now, please leave the premises" he added sternly as he closed and locked up the exterior doors again before they heard him burst out laughing again on the other side.

It was a long, quiet drive back to the house. Marge groaned under her breath as she held up the invitation. If it had not been for the fact it had been printed on toilet paper it would've passed for a perfect invitation, it had a boarder, a cute picture of a happy looking cartoon lawn mower, their names, everything, but it only represented a very cruel trick, a prank. The moment she thought 'prank' her suspicions went straight to Bart but quickly pushed that idea away because Bart was never such an artist and anyway, as she felt the texture of the toilet paper, she realised it wasn't the brand she usually got, this stuff was rougher and more papery while the toilet paper she got from the Kwik-E-Mart was softer and much more springy.

So if Bart didn't send this then who did? She wondered briefly if it was a camera show like _candid camera. _When they turned up at home would they find a camera crew right there and a witty, smartly dressed host all laughing at them?

6:00am now, it had taken them so long to return because Homer had left the hand break on again and was fighting to build up speed through the town but she didn't point this mistake out this time because if a hidden camera show had done this she wanted to put off the humiliation as much as possible.

When they arrived back however there was no camera crew and the house looked pretty well locked up, almost all the lights off and through the window they could see Grandpa Simpson snoring away to himself and... Marge wasn't certain but she could've sworn she saw a long green blur race away from Grandpa and rapidly climb the stairs, but she just put this odd sight down to her own fatigue.

Marge sighed at the memory and that her night out away from the kids had been so stressful for her. But as they were driving home Homer had promised her tomorrow night they'd go out for a night on the town. She wasn't going to get her hopes up however, because they'd probably end up going to Moes for the night, but it would be a night out at least.

Homer opened the front door of the house and they went inside, everything looked normal, completely like they had left it. Grandpa Simpson was standing in the dining room near the long table snoring peacefully and there was no mess, no graffiti by Bart, the house was completely clean. She was even more surprised when she entered the kitchen and found it sparklingly clean, almost blindingly clean, much cleaner then she had left it only hours before.

Homer put a hand out to hold her back "Hold it here Marge" he said in a whisper "We don't want to disturb Slimer" he'd said pointing a shivering finger to the fridge. Against Homers advice she walked over to it and opened its door and found, not a blobby ghost, but a disaster area on the inside. Most of the food was missing, all the shelves had collapsed and a strange pink substance that was probably cranberry sauce was dripping all over it. It was as if all the mess in the house had been concentrated into this one small area.

Marge moaned softly as she closed the fridge, she expected some mess but she didn't expect it to be so concentrated. She checked the sink for dirty dishes, there were none, this was completely out of character for the kids, the house was clean and tidy if you didn't count the devastation in the fridge. Usually she'd come home and it would be as if the place had been turned into a trash dump, but now...

Marge wasn't certain, but as she stood by the sink peering out into the darkness she thought she could just make out the shape of a chemical toilet standing in the backyard next to Santa's Little Helper's dog house. But it was so dark outside she couldn't make it out clearly. She shrugged and decided she must be imagining it, what would a portable toilet be doing in their backyard and why would it have a small light on top of it?

As she continued her inspection of the house she found something else that didn't belong there. In the living room, next to the opening that connected it to the TV room, just sticking in by its point was a long, sharp knife. Were the kids playing with knifes? she gasped as she reached out and plucked it from the wall, it hadn't been in deep but it did look very, very sharp and was in quite a way up the wall, about level with her head. Bart could've thrown it there she guessed.

"Homer!" she said in panic and Homer came running into the room, the buttons on his suit straining to contain the mass of jiggling fat they held at bay, a tired look in his eyes. "I think the kids have been playing with knifes!" she explained.

Homer didn't look concerned at this at all as, like his dad, he suddenly closed his eyes, his head fell back and he dropped to asleep where he stood.

"Homer!" she shouted to wake him up, which he did with a start. "I'm up, I'm up!" he squealed.

"Homie this is serious!" she said trying to get across how dangerous it was if the kids were playing with sharp objects "I found this in the wall" she said holding up the knife, the blade clutched between her thumb and forefinger.

Homer gently plucked it from Marge's hand and slowly took out his thick rimmed glasses and placed them on his nose and moved the knife around examining it closely like he was an expert in this field. "It's not one of ours Marge" he said finally "I've eaten with every fork, every knife, every spoon and soup ladle in this house, I even know how to reverse a stomach pump, and this leads me to conclude me-lady" he said adopting the voice of an academic, something he sometimes seemed to do when he knew what he was talking about –which was a rarity- "that this knife is not one of ours."

"You think our son bought it somewhere?" Marge asked as Homer removed his glasses, put the knife down on the table and shrugged with an "I don't know" type sound coming from his mouth. Then as if this didn't concern him in the slightest he turned around and started climbing the stairs to go to bed.

Marge moaned at Homers lack of interest in his kids safety. She'd have some stern words about this with Bart in the morning she decided as she picked the mystery knife up and went into the kitchen. She removed a box from on top of the fridge that had once been filled with health food and was labelled health food, but inside the box was an assortment of items she'd confiscated from Bart including his slingshot, his water pistol that he fired car urine out of, and a video game box and CD which contained a very violent video game called Grand Theft Scratchy IV.

She placed the knife in the box with the other items, replaced the lid and placed it back on top of the fridge before turning around and followed Homer up the stairs. She'd speak to Bart in the morning about that knife she decided, but now she wanted to get some sleep before she had to wake up half an hour before she went to bed to start her duties as a full time mom again. But before she went to bed she checked on all three of the kids, Bart, Lisa and Maggie to make sure they were alright.

Bart was sleeping peacefully as was Maggie, no cuts from a knife were on them as far as she could see and they were all breathing at least which meant they were alive. She could take comfort that the knife didn't appear to have any blood on it but she wanted to make absolutely sure, so she could go to bed and sleep for the rest of the night.

Out of all three of her kids Lisa looked like she was the odd one out, she didn't look like she was cut or bleeding anywhere but it was the fact that she was sleeping in her clothes and not in her night things, that was curious to Marge.

Satisfied they were all alright Marge left Lisa's room and went to her bedroom where she found Homer, face down on the bed still in his best clothes snoring into his pillow.

* * *

Crap! That was the one thing she'd forgotten to do! She realised when her Mom came into the room. She was so used to changing her clothes so fast with the Mask's powers that she often forgot what she was wearing whether it was practical or not, and in this instance she forgot to change out of her red dress and sandals into her night things. But either way Mom seemed to be fooled as she gently walked out the door and closed it behind her.

Lisa listened as soft footsteps slowly receded away from her bedroom door. Mom had been fooled, completely and utterly. Though she wanted to jump out of bed at this point she decided to wait, wait for the sound, the noise of Mom and Dad's own bedroom door closing so she knew it was safe to move without the risk of being discovered.

The gently noise of a door closing came and Lisa smiled as she kicked off the bed covers, leapt off her bed and landed at the foot of it. She laced her fingers and cracked her knuckles as she again wondered. 'What should I do now?' Having fun with Bart was out of the question now, if she decide to play jokes on him Mom and Dad would obviously hear them. She also couldn't go after Flanders now either because the noise she'd probably make would wake Mom and Dad up as well.

She thought for a moment, what could an eight year old girl do during the night, especially when she had the powers of a god? She could do anything after all but the problem was choice. She oddly felt calmer now after that little bout of anger she vented in the forest a few minutes ago, when she was fuming about corrupt governments, ignorant religious quacks, con men –though was there a difference between the three?-, etc, etc. Well now that she felt better she could find something constructive to do that would involve the destruction of someone's world.

While she waited for her mind to come up with something to do Lisa looked at herself in the mirror adjusting her appearance so it went back to the big green head and crazy red eyes, the guise of the Mask. She also tidied her hair so all the points were evenly spaced and curved a little so they pointed away from the face and showed herself her rows of purl white teeth to make sure they were still shiny enough to blind anyone looking at them. It took Lisa a while however to realise something wasn't right with her reflection. Though she made movements and changes to her appearance and was conscious that they had taken place, her reflection hadn't adopted those changes, nor was her reflection matching the movements she was performing as if she wasn't looking at a reflection at all but a window with someone else standing beyond it, but it had to be a reflection, it was a mirror after all. Her reflection stood there hands on hips a frowning, scolding look on her face.

Something so unusual usually wouldn't bother her since it all stems from the powers of the Mask that she controlled, that was it usually wouldn't bother her apart from one additional factor, she wasn't aware she was allowing it to happen.

She stopped for a moment and regarded her reflection curiously, tilting her head one way then the other. Her reflection did not copy this simple movement. She then raised her left hand and waved it slowly in front of her, again her reflection did not copy the movements, instead it just stood there with that grumpy looking face.

"Must be broken" she said jokingly. There was something odd about her reflection though, she almost couldn't put her finger on it, but when she did it raised more questions for her then it answered.

Her reflection was her own, but it wasn't of 'her' as she was now, it was of how she used to be, Lisa without the Mask. For some reason she was reflecting the image of the real Lisa Simpson in the mirror, no green face, no massive teeth, no red eyes, no unusual hair style –if you could call that punk look usual-, even the reflections clothes were different, they were Lisa's usual attire.

"Gonna have to fix this sometime" Lisa added.

The reflection lips moved even though she herself was not speaking, and she could hear the words that went with the lip movements, but not through her ears as she'd imagined, she heard them in her head.

"_There's nothing wrong with the mirror, it's you"_

Lisa froze for a moment, unsure if she really heard those words. She reached up and lightly knocked three times on her own head as if there was some loose connection this would allow to fall back into place. But it seemed to have no effect, Lisa the original was still standing there a look of dislike in her eyes.

Lisa went up to the mirror and knocked on it as if it would reveal how this trick was done.

"Hey, nice trick you've got there." She said leaning back away from the mirror "can you pull a rabbit out of a hat?"

"_Who are you?"_ The reflection asked accusingly "W_hat are you?"_

If she was imagining this then it was a weird thing to imagine.

"_You're not imagining it"_ said the voice again as if it read her mind, maybe it did, maybe it was her mind.

"Well now, isn't this swell?" Lisa said out loud "nice of you to join the party, in a somewhat ghostly fashion." She guessed that the reflection was, in a sense, the real Lisa Simpson, a ghost of the version of her the Mask bypassed to let the new Lisa Simpson free. Somehow she had found a way of speaking to her through the mirror though how she was doing this she couldn't tell. "Tell me though, how are you doing that? I'd like to stop it, its irritating."

"_Remember when you used to bubble to the surface, when I wasn't wearing the Mask?" _she let the question hang in the air. She fixed her with an accusing look of dislike that Lisa, the one in the Mask, ignored.

"_Well, a door, once open can be stepped through in either direction."_ The reflection said smiling at her cleverness "_and you left the back door open."_

"Oh don't give me this crap it's too early in the morning" Lisa said as she made to turn her back on her reflection. "We'll catch up some other time, I've got people to harass and twist to my way of thinking."

"_There's no way you're a part of me!"_ she heard the reflection cry out.

Lisa turned to regard her reflection again with a look of boredom. "Believe it or not, Lis" she said using Barts shortened name for Lisa "it won't change the fact, I am as much a part of you as the Fox News is the greatest work of fiction of all time." She then rushed up to the mirror and leaned into it to be intimidating, but the Lisa reflection did not look very intimidated however she did take a step back showing a slight hint of fear.

"What exactly were you expecting from your own subconscious?" she asked "A nice, polite, gentle little girl who seeks be bring peace to the world and harmony between fellow humans and nature? Someone who wishes humanity would obtain a great oneness with their environment? Someone who'd want to educate the ignorant masses, when all 'they' wanna do is continue with their cushy, none important, lazy existence?"

For a brief few moments the reflection didn't answer and looked slightly taken aback at this outburst "Umm, Yes" she answered.

"Then you're a bigger idiot then I thought you were" Lisa said sighing "Wake up and smell the stink of your own deluded rubbish, **I'M IT!**" she paused to let that last two words hang in the air. "Like it or not, little Lisa, I'm inside your head, I have always been inside your head" she placed both her index fingers on either side of her temples before pushing them back around the back of her head. "All that repressed anger, all the frustration you've built up over your life and pushed to the back of your head. Bart playing countless pranks on you... on 'us'" she corrected "Grownups who'd never take 'us' seriously because we're just a kid, an eight year old. The big corporations and industries in Springfield patronising 'us' and brushing 'us' aside as if we're insects beneath their notice. How many times have you retreated to your room and let all that anger and rage brew in that little noggin' of yours that I've been calling home?"

The reflection didn't answer, Lisa was aware of how she behaves while wearing the Mask, she was last time so why was this ghost of her old self acting so shocked by what the Mask had made of her?

"The Mask gave all that an escape, and **I** am that escape, **I** am its product." She explained further and when her reflection did not reply she went on. "Now listen, if 'we' want to make a difference to the world, a true difference then we're not going to get it by just talking to those idiots in power, showing them graphs and pie charts and appealing to their morals. The only things they understand is money, the more money they can get the better, its insanity, we have to act! Actions 'shout' much louder than words." She explained.

"_But you've seriously hurt someone!"_ her reflection screamed back at her, irritation growing _"Those policemen were only doing their jobs and you forced those animals to attack, starch and bite them. What if you had killed someone?"_

"Hey, this is war and there are always casualties in war" the Lisa in the mirror looked shocked at what she was saying. "If we want to make progress in our 'war' then sacrifices must be made."

"_But that's what major corporations do! They brush people aside!"_ the reflection implored trying to appeal to some sort of sense of guilt of Lisa's now hypocritical ideas, guilt that an ID was not capable of.

"Progress Lisa, you want the same things I do after all we are the same person, we both want a better, safer world for everyone." Why was she trying to justify her actions to herself? "We're not so different but I just take a more hands on approach to it."

"_Well, you won't ever get your chance to be more' hands on'. At some point the Mask will come off, it only works at night and it must be close to dawn right now!"_ At these words alarm bells suddenly rang in Lisa's head. She was right, she had so much to do in this world, so many people to spread her word to but as soon as dawn came she'd go right back into her little box inside her own head and have to wait for the next time Lisa puts the Mask back on, and by the sound of 'her' it sounded like there wouldn't be a next time.

"You've got a point there spiky!" Lisa said rubbing her green, rubber chin. "But there is a way around it. You see where it's light on one side of the planet" she mimed placing one finger of her right hand on one side of her head, before placing her a finger of her other hand onto the other side of her head, "it's dark on the other, as long as I stay on the dark side of the planet" she tapped at the side of her head she had dubbed the dark side "I can remain in this form FOREVER!"

At this, the real Lisa looked shocked and completely lost for words. Her eyes grew wider as she slowly understood what this meant for her. "But..._! What about me?"_ real Lisa asked pushing her face up against the glass as if she was trying to break out.

"What about you? You're redundant, a dinosaur. The first thing that's going to change in my new world order"

"_Stop it!" _the dinosaur insisted anger evidently rising in her blood, a sight Lisa found amusing and grinned at_ "Stop it right now, there's no way you're a part of me, I would never be so callus, even to myself!" _her reflection insisted pushing herself up against the mirror barrier as if to try to pass through the glass. A mad, crazy gleam came into her eyes as her hands pressed against the glass and looked like they were going to try to throttle the Lisa in the Mask as soon as they broke out.

"Ah, now you see" Lisa said coolly as she leaned in close and pressed her index finger onto the tip of the reflected Lisa's nose "'That'..." she announced "...is me!"

The reflected Lisa's face changed, it slowly started to get a mixture of shock, understanding, comprehension, massive anger and defiance that she somehow managed all at once. She didn't speak, her eyes looked like they were unfocused as what the new Lisa said slowly sank in.

The reflection remained silent for a long time as all this dawned on her but the longer she did the more bored Lisa's in control subconscious got. Finally after having enough of the boredom she turned on her heels and began walking away.

"Well, I've got stuff to do, and frankly talking to yourself is always the first sigh of madness. Have a nice life..." she stopped and turned to grin and smile at the mirror but the ghostly reflection of herself was now gone, replaced by the reflection of the new Lisa, a reflection that mirrored her movements perfectly, 'it' was gone.

"Goodbye, Lisa Simpson" she said as she prepared to open the window, leave her room and retreat away from the rising sun so she could remain in this form forever.

Smack! She felt something slap her face across her right cheek, it was too quick for her to catch but it had impacted very sharply and... and... she felt it. She felt pain, the pain it should've provided had she not been wearing the Mask, but she was wearing the Mask how come she was feeling this? She pushed this question to the back of her head as she turned around to see where the blow had come from.

"Okay! Who's the wise guy?" she shouted looking for the culprit, but she couldn't see anyone.

Thump! Someone just punched her really hard in the face and another jolt of pain rang through her jaw. Why was she feeling this pain when the Mask should protect her from it? She looked around her room to see who had swung that punch, but she could see no one in the room with her at all so where had it come from?

Something odd was going on and she raised her left arm to scratch her head, but her arm did not comply, it remained where it was by her side. Curiously she tried to raise it but it stubbornly refused to move, it just hung limp like it was dead. She looked down at it and noticed the knuckles on that hand were scraped. Something stranger was now happening, her left arm had started shivering and flexing of its own accord and slowly she started to get the sensation of pins and needles in it then she slowly lost all sensation like it dying and was preparing to drop off.

That thought gained less credibility to her when her left arm made a move, it raised itself up in front of her and clenched all its fingers except for her mid and index fingers, which involuntary turned to point directly at her face. She could see where this was going as her odd arm quickly brought those two extended fingers up towards her eyes! She reached up and caught her wrist in a vice like grip before it could poke her eyes out.

What the heck is going on? Why was her arm doing this to her? Despite her strength for some reason her disobedient arm was just as strong as she was, because it was her arm after all. But the struggle to keep her fingers away from her eyes was intensifying and the tips slowly came closer and closer to her eyes. Everything else faded out of focus as her eyes followed the two fingers that were almost within touching distance.

What's it doing? Why is it doing it?

She felt one heave from her rebellious arm and the fingers poked her own eyes sharply. She yelped in pain and pushed her possessed arm away but it was about to circle around for another attack on her eyes. Lisa tried to outsmart it by clamping her hands over them so her two fingers couldn't reach her eyes and instead continuously bounced off her hand.

She couldn't feel anything in her fingers or her entire left arm now, it felt very numb and lifeless yet it seemed to have a life of its own. It halted its assault on her eyes but she couldn't sense what it was about to do next because it felt so detached from her, but she guessed it was waiting for her to remove her good hand from her face and then charge at her eyes again. Lisa found out how wrong she was a few seconds later when a thumping pain in her stomach told her the left hand had clenched into a fist and had swung down punching into her stomach, knocking the wind out of her and forcing her to keel over onto her right side clutching her stomach with her working right arm. How come she was feeling pain? She was still wondering.

"_A door once opened can be crossed in either direction." _Said that voice again.

"You again! Are you doing this to me?" she said out loud to herself coughing while she lay on her side, her arm raising up in the air of its own accord like a snake ready to strike, it spread its fingers and shot down towards her face, towards the Mask! Thinking fast Lisa quickly tried to roll over onto her front, the arm hadn't been expecting this and couldn't get out of the way quick enough as her torso rolled on top of it and pinned it to the ground. It struggled under her weight as it tried to break free and attack her again but it looked like she'd outsmarted it at last, that was until she felt her possessed hand pinch her tightly on her right shoulder causing her to yelp and her body to spasm allowing the arm to get out from under her and sharply punch her in the face for trying to trap it. She quickly got to her feet and prepared to defend herself against her own arm. But it wasn't doing anything now, it just hung in the air and was swinging from left to right like an enchanted snake waiting for its next instruction. "I see you're 'armed' and dangerous!" she added.

"_I thought you said talking to yourself was the first sign of madness?"_ the voice stated and Lisa could just imagine the smirk on its stupid face if it had one.

"I think I went past that phase light years ago" she added "How the heck are you doing this, stop iiIIIIIT!" She screamed as she felt her rogue hand grab a fist full of her hair from the back of her head and pulled back with all it could muster

"I said stop iiiIIIITTT!" Lisa felt the skin on her face begin peeling off, the Mask wasn't coming off but it felt like her skin was stretching away from her head, and it was, revealing the skull underneath through the eye holes in her face.

The hand released her hair and everything fell back into its normal place but the hand then swung down and clamped its fingers around her nose and started pulling on it. Eyes widening Lisa quickly reached up and grabbed her rebel arms wrist to stop it, she knew what it was trying to do, it was trying to remove the Mask. Though the Mask wasn't coming off, her nose was starting to stretch out like it was made of melting rubber and when her possessed fingers did let go of it, the long nose sprang back and it lightly slapped against her own forehead before hanging limply a meter in length.

"_What time is it?"_ she heard the true voice of Lisa Simpson in her head as her nose slowly retracted back to its original shape. Her rogue hand reached up and gripped her crown and forced her to turn her head to look at the clock by her bedside. It was 6:55am, it was practically morning and sun rise would be in about 15 minutes time! But this didn't make sense, the Mask stops working only during the day why was it faulting now?

"_The Mask is still working"_ said that voice in her head _"But dawn is fast approaching"_

Dawn fast approaching? Lisa suddenly remembered the last time she'd wore the Mask, that time she didn't have it on from dusk till dawn. She'd removed it midway through the night, so did the Mask gradually lose its power as dawn slowly marched towards them?

It was odd, but it felt like small trickles of water were running around her brain, over every synapse and nerve, she almost felt light headed and as the precious minutes ticked away counting down till dawn she could feel she was losing herself, losing everything she had made of herself tonight. She had to get out of here and return to the dark side of the planet before her pathetic counterpart took over again.

"No!" she said under her breath, she turned and tried to make a run for it, but as she took a step forward she felt her right leg twist and trip herself up and she fell back to the floor.

"Stop it!" she shouted as her body attempted to wrestle with itself. Her rebelling hand clamped down over her face and started pulling. Lisa tried to send herself into a twister tornado, this broke the rogue hands grip but with everything spinning around she suddenly found she had no direction and kept slamming into things. Try as she might she couldn't direct herself either out the door or through the window. Knowing this was getting her nowhere and time was short she decided to come to a stop.

Lisa continued to struggle against her two none cooperative limbs, all the while through her window she could see the sky slowly start to become brighter as the rising sun approached. But she still had time but how short dawned on her as she felt the barriers, the social limiting factors, the bars, the prison that kept her ID safely in check begin to lower and close again.

"Don't be an idiot, you need me!" she shouted more into her head then verbally.

"_Yes, you're right, I do."_ said the voice again "_You've made me realise you're just another part of me, the part that's angry and annoyed, but you're also the part that has the passion to continue fighting for what I believe in, to not back down in the face of authority. You've made me realise that without you, I wouldn't be me."_

"Stop right there!" she insisted "I don't want to be part of you, I never want to be part of you, I like being free!"

She didn't notice her rogue arm had stopped wrestling with her when she felt a cold chill run through the back of her head, worrying she tried to locate where her rogue arm had gone. As she tried to swivel her head she was sure she'd found it. It was behind her head and was digging its nails into the fold in the Mask!

"_It's time you came home"_ the voice said in triumph, she was winning and Lisa knew it "_it's past your bedtime"_

"No!" she yelled as she used her one working hand to reach up and try to force her rogue arm to let go of her face. "Stop it! I won't go back!" Despite her struggles she could feel the Mask slowly start to peel off away from her head as she fought against it and due to a mixture of this and the effect of the rising sun meant Lisa's animated subconscious was losing the fight.

"No, you can't do this!" she screamed in desperation almost pleading "You can't do this to me! IT'S NOT FAIR!"

Though the Mask was only starting to come off she was starting to feel herself become weaker and weaker and weaker, and less and less like the Mask's version of her.

"This is murder, you're trying to kill me!" She felt colder as what made Lisa, Lisa Simpson started to flood back into her head. The light trickle of water she'd felt rolling over her brain was fast becoming a flood and as more of Lisa flooded back the more trapped and confined she felt. It was as if a prison was forming around her and the more the Mask was pulled away the more of Lisa Simpson came back into her mind the more her own mind state started to change. Her actions and thoughts which were 'stop the rogue arm, protect the Mask, I don't want to go back to the way I was' were starting to slowly change to the order and desires of 'remove the Mask, pull it off, I don't want to be like this anymore'.

_No please stop! _Try as she might to shout out Lisa's Mask persona just couldn't hear it coming from her own mouth as the Mask, the key to her existence outside Lisa's mind, continued to slowly peel away from her head. The one arm she still felt she had control over released her rogue arm, which still clutched tightly onto the Mask, and instead joined in its counterpart's mission to remove it by grabbing the other edge and pulling, she'd lost control of it. She was losing, Lisa's ID couldn't win.

She felt emotions like guilt, compassion and depression all starting to become stronger and stronger, all of them were changing the attitude she had towards her actions tonight, where she had felt great satisfaction she was started to feel regret, sorrow and in some cases horror.

She opened her eyes and could see the sun starting to rise, she was too late she'd lost, there was no way she could win. _No, no, no..._ the part of her the Mask unleashed was saying, but Lisa Simpson was firmly back in the driving seat and felt more in control and like her normal self now as the green rubbery mask slowly started to harden and gain the texture of wood as she continued to pull it off her face. She could still feel her raging subconscious mind struggling for control it could no longer have.

In one final desperate attempt to appeal to Lisa Simpson's compassionate side, her inner self managed to say, rather sulkily and pathetically, full of false but convincing depression, through the hardening Mask lips, "_I thought you were my friend..."_

Then 'it' was gone.

With her inner demons were tucked away back into her subconscious as Lisa won the battle and pulled the Mask free with all her might. She pushed the solid and cold object away from her face but it still clung to portions of her skin and stretched them out as if her ID was still desperately trying to cling to life.

But finally it suddenly let go of her and her skin flopped back onto her face as the infernal thing came away in her hands, back in its inert form and Lisa Simpson, the real Lisa Simpson gasped for breath as if she had been held underwater for a long period of time. Everything that made her Lisa Simpson had completely flooded back into her head, she was back to normal but the sheer effort she used to fight and beat back her inner persona finally took its strain and Lisa Simpson dizzily fell forwards, collapsing into a heap on the floor and passing out, the Mask still clutched firmly in her hand.

* * *

**To Be Continued...**

* * *

**Authors notes:** Lisa Simpson fighting back against her Mask persona was inspired by two sources. The first that's obvious was the Nutty Professor, when the Professor and his alter ego Buddy Love fight each other for dominance over the body. The second source is from the 'Red Dwarf' episode 'Balance of Power' where the ships hologram, Rimmer gets his hologram disks corrupted giving him the arm of another hologram, one that's hostile and attacks him.

In this chapter I wanted to explore a little deeper what goes on in a persons mind while they wear the Mask and what happens when they reach the point when the Mask tries to manipulate the mind of the wearer. In Lisa's case, she had a lot of prepressed rage and anger towards certain events in her life like all Bart's humiliating pranks on her or times when people ignore science in favour of superstition, such as the events in the episode 'the Monkey Suit' or 'Lisa the Skeptic'. The Mask taps into the ID, part of the subconscious which stores memories so the Mask not only allowed Lisa's ID free rule over her actions, it also unleashed all those bad memories to influence her behavior and the longer she remained in the Mask, the more her anger started to drive her out of her mind almost to the point where she'd go after anyone who annoyed her no matter how petty the reason was. Lucky for Springfield then that she managed to remove the Mask before it pushed her too far.

The Simpsons episode referenced in this chapter is called 'the Monkey Suit' and I thought her experiences in that episode would've left a bad taste in her mouth that the Mask would try to use.

Gypsies tramps and thieves – was written and performed by Cher, no copyright infringement is intended and the lyrics used were only used in humour.

I do not claim that the opinions and thoughts expressed by the characters in this story reflect my own in anyway.


	17. 101 ways to destroy the Mask

**Chapter 16**

**101 ways to destroy the Mask**

Lisa gently drifted back into consciousness and thank goodness she felt her normal self again. Her head was pounding from the mental struggle she fought to regain control of her mind and body from the influence of the Mask. As she lay there she registered that she felt very ill and she was shivering as if she had a cold and clutched in her left hand she could feel the solid form of the wooden Mask, ultimate proof it was off her face.

She raised her head and opened her eyes, but her optical nerves were assaulted by the bright light shining through her window. She snapped her eyes closed as pain shot past her brain, she breathed deeply and slowly as she gently opened her eyes and they slowly became accustomed to the light. She hadn't felt this terrible since she caught a cold the time Homer shoved her into the back of a freezer to look for specific flavours of ice-cream. She rolled over onto her back and took a deep breath as the memories of her struggle came back to her.

For some reason, this time while she was wearing the Mask she realised what it must feel like to be her Mask persona while she wasn't wearing the infernal thing. It felt trapped like a caged animal wanting to be let out. As the Mask had started to peel off she remembered a feeling of panic from her subconscious as the animal was slowly trapped back in its cage. If her unconscious felt that way, if it could feel at all, she had to admit she felt a pang of sorrow for it because at the same time Lisa herself knew what it felt like to be trapped and constricted from doing what she wanted to accomplish. The difference was in her case, she was constricted by narrow minded people in power, or people who belittle her because of her age, while her Mask persona felt constricted because of the other parts of Lisa's personality. Though she pitied it, she wasn't feeling so sorry that she would let it free again. Her ID had after all tried to hijack her body and take over her life.

She didn't feel ashamed that there was a monster lurking inside her head, not anymore. Everyone probably has some part of their personality they didn't like. In her case the Mask distilled all her own insecurities and suppressed rage to create, Lisa mark 2, a monster that was teetering on the brink of hurting people for no reason.

She gave a slight chuckle when the thought occurred to her that she had just saved Springfield, even if it was from herself. Though 'she' was a monster, when Lisa had raged at herself for doing this to her, Lisa was ready to throttle the life out of the monster the first chance she got until Lisa 2 cut her down to size simply by saying, 'that' was her, her anger at being treated like she didn't matter her hatred for the creature she became, it was the same part of her that went into creating Lisa 2. That's when Lisa had an epiphany. She realised that this monster was just another part of her overall personality. Probably the parts that let her fight authority without tiring, the part that gave her the passion to fight for what she believed in, now that's a big part of what makes her who she is and it represents what she is proud of in her life. Sure, it also had all the repressed rage and anger from deep inside her head, but that was the point, it was buried deep inside her head where it hardly ever rose its ugly head. Realising this Lisa then came to the conclusion that if this monster was only a part of her overall then there must be another side to her. There must be a good bit somewhere inside her head keeping the ID and subconscious in check. That is what gave her the strength to fight back.

When she found the back door, or rather when that 'part of her brain the Mask bypassed' found the back door –since Lisa was technically the monster at the time- she knew her mind was already fighting back against the unruly part of her mind like it was fighting off an infection. Somehow while cut off from the rest of her working mind her suppressed side was able to think and plan and defeat the monster. She genuinely felt proud of that.

Her suppressed mind was trying to stall her from leaving, to allow the sun to come up and disable the Mask, but when she –in her Masked state of mind- threw the suppressed part a curve ball that shocked it to her core she'd tried to escape before anything else happened. But that's when the suppressed parts of her mind realised the Mask was already sufficiently weak that she could gain control to an extent and start fighting back, and as the sun slowly rose Lisa 2 gradually became weaker and weaker, especially when she started to pull the Mask off. Now it was back where it belonged.

Lisa felt strangely at peace now knowing that though a monster roamed inside her head there was a good bit, its jailer keeping it under control.

She spent about an hour just laying on the floor mulling this over, when she decided it was time to get up, though exhausted she had a job to do. She got up and rubbed her head, her eyelids felt heavy and she felt very tired since she technically didn't get much sleep last night, but at least she no longer felt ill now. She stood up still clutching the Mask firmly in her grip and held it out in front of her and fixed it with a cold look of dislike.

Lisa tried to stifle a scream as something large, solid and heavy landed on her foot with a clank, the pain made her drop the Mask as -whatever it was that landed on her foot- was followed by several more loud clanks as more heavy things fell onto and started piling up at her feet. Shaking with pain but not wanting to scream she hopped up and down madly clenching her teeth, she breathed and wheezed but the pain was so much she just had to scream to release it. Lisa hopped madly over to her bed and picked up her pillow, shoved it to her mouth and screamed as loud as she could into it. It muffled the sound perfectly.

Screaming over she dropped the pillow to the floor and looked at her feet, they had started to turn pink and as she wiggled her toes she felt more pain, she clenched her fists as this new pain sparked around her feet. She limped a little but otherwise she was sure her feet were alright as long as she didn't wiggle her toes, nothing was broken as far as she could tell. Returning to the foot of her bed she found out what had just crushed her feet, her hands rushed up to her mouth to stop a horrified squeal of surprise.

Sitting in a little pile in front of her were six solid, gold bars, gold bars she had stolen when she robbed Mr. Burns' mansion, gold bars she didn't destroy with the rest of the evidence but instead kept them and dropped them into a pocket in her dress, which she now considered odd since there were no pockets in her dress. With the Mask gone the spell had been broken so these gold bars appeared back into existence where they had vanished and rained down on her feet.

This was not good! Imprinted in the solid bars were the signatures of who it belonged to, stamped with the image of C. Montgomery Burns so there would be no doubt who it really belonged to and if anyone found it here, especially her parents or Bart and they tried to sell the bars then someone would recognise the mark and realise they were stolen property and inform the police who would be on them like a ton of bricks.

_Oh, poor choice of words Lisa,_ she thought to herself as her feet continued to ache.

What the heck had she been thinking back then? She had to get rid of this stuff now and fast, she couldn't leave it in here especially when Mom came to do some spring cleaning. Lisa would have to hide them for now, because first she intended to get rid of another irritating little object.

That thing, that stupid Mask has caused her and her family nothing but trouble, she thought as she knelt down and stuck her fingers through the eye holes and lifted it up. Though last time she felt silly blaming it for what her demons had done she now felt she could squarely blame the Mask for everything that's happened to her in the last few weeks, not just what she did tonight or the first time she wore it but the voices in her head distracting her from her school work as well as the nightmares and the momentary smartass remarks her ID had made her say against her will. That stupid smile it had, as if it was laughing at her made her want to physically punch the thing. Wherever Loki, god of mischief was he's probably having a very good laugh at her at this moment.

She decided enough was enough, this time it was the last straw, she was going to destroy this curse once and for all.

She glanced at the clock, 7:45am, mom and dad went to bed at around six and Bart wouldn't get up until nine because today was a Saturday, no school so no reason to get up. This gave her time to go down stairs without anyone noticing, go into the garage and use some of Homers power tools and rip this wooden mask to shreds.

But before that, she had to hide all this gold. Placing the Mask on the bed she heaved a gold bar into her arms, it was incredibly heavy for her small size and she hid it in the only place she could think of, under her bed. It took her five minutes to stack the six gold bars neatly under her bed and hide them among her toys before she returned to the business of the Mask.

Scooping it back up again she opened her bedroom door gently and peered outside, no one was around as far as she could see and her path was clear. She gingerly stepped out still clutching the Mask tightly and gently shut her door behind her.

She quietly made her way across the hall, slowly limping due to her aching toes, the last thing she needed was for someone to wake up and find her here. She especially didn't want Bart to get hold of this thing again, no doubt his inner demons would want revenge on her for what she did to him last night.

She stopped for a moment and stood in the silence before glancing back at the door that lead to Bart's room. She thought about what she did to him and guilt flooded her to her bones. She didn't really want to hurt Bart, just scare him a little, all those pranks and schemes he played on her genuinely hurt her and she wanted him to stop it but he never listened, and at the time what she did seemed the only way to get that message across. But the Mask hijacked that idea and tapped into her mind to bring out all the bad memories she had of him, all those other pranks that she had not repaid him for, like the time he ruined her babysitting career, okay he'd said he was sorry afterwards but that still didn't make up for the fact that he'd ruined it, and part of her still wanted revenge for it. But she took solace in knowing she didn't manage to do half the nasty things she wanted to do to him, and anyway she wasn't that person anymore, but she doubted if Bart would see it that way.

Putting Bart out of her mind for now she quietly walked down the stairs as silent as a mouse, walked past Grandpa who was still standing and snoring in the dining room and entered the kitchen where she saw her Dad! Holding the Mask behind her back she was about to explain why she was up this early, she didn't have an answer right now but she was quickly thinking of one.

"Dad, umm... good morning, umm..." still thinking of an excuse, she lightly chuckled her herself "You're probably wondering why I'm up so early? Well you see it's umm... umm...Dad?" Homer didn't look like he was paying attention as he lurched from side to side on his feet still dressed in a very creased, dark blue suit and shirt, he was in his bare feet slowly munching on something in his mouth that looked like a string of hotdogs from one of the cupboards.

"Dad?" she asked gently but her father did not turn to acknowledge her existence. He looked like a zombie as he stood there, eyes closed, eating the hotdog string. The last one entered his mouth as he continued to chew and Lisa for some reason got the image of a cow in a field gradually and blissfully chewing on grass for hours on end. Then Homer swallowed the whole thing in one go.

He must be sleep walking, she reasoned, a theory that was proven when Homer gently lurched from one side to the other in a strange zombie style walk and just walked straight past her muttering in a very slow voice "Homer... hungry,... must... feed"

He went into a cupboard with very sluggish movements and pulled out a box of cakes that he took with him out of the kitchen. A few seconds later she could hear Homers sluggish footfalls heading back up the stairs.

Lisa exhaled the breath she didn't even know she was holding. All it took was for dad to wake up and see her with Bart's mask, okay 'he' would've done nothing but she was thinking of afterwards when she tried to explain herself to mom, because dad would no doubt go to bed and probably mention Lisa was downstairs doing something and she didn't want to be disturbed while she destroyed this accursed thing.

With dad out of the way she went into a small corridor that led to the garage. There was still pain in her feet from earlier when the gold bars had landed on them and she could feel her small plastic sandals start to tighten as her feet started to swell up. That was the sort of thing you would go see a doctor about, but first she'd have to come up with a good explanation why her feet were swollen like this before talking to mom.

She opened the door to the garage and went inside, she stretched up on her tiptoes which hurt like heck and flipped the light switch and the long neon light above flickered to life. The garage was colder than the rest of the house which was a benefit for her red, swollen feet, it was also dusty and had a very musty odder. Lisa hated it in here because it was always full of spiders and roaches and she, well she didn't exactly hate them she just had a little cringing dislike for anything with more than six legs. She put that thought to the back of her mind however because she had a job to do.

She pulled a stool over to her dads work bench and climbed on top so she had a good view of the work bench. The bench was littered with a variety of objects Homer had made with his tool collection, like the tool wrack itself which held an assortment of tools like wrenches, hammers and screwdrivers but like everything Homer tried to make however it was also very flimsy and badly made with dozens of loose nails that weren't hammered in incorrectly and hooks which were just hanging off ready to drop whatever tool it had on it. As she watched a hook came out of the board and a hammer it held up dropped to the desk with a loud bang.

Lisa gave the badly made thing a pitiful look, most of the time when they were all asleep they didn't know if a loud crash during the night was a burglar in the house or just one of dads constructions falling to bits again.

She placed the Mask face up on the desk and picked up the heavy hammer that had just conveniently fallen from the wrack. She raised it up and planned to strike the dead centre of the Viking mask, the part where logically it would be most weak and most likely to break.

The hammer came down with a mighty bang and the mask instantly vanished from her sight but instantly reappeared again a few nanoseconds later as the thing rammed into Lisa's stomach. She lost her balance on the stool and fell over landing on the cold, solid concrete floor and just managed to avoid banging her head but she did suffer some scrapes and cuts on her elbows. She coughed as she felt the pain in her stomach where she knew she'd get a bruise sometime today.

In her lap the Mask sat smiling up at as it did as if it found her pathetic attempt to smash it amusing. She looped her fingers through the annoying thing's eye holes and lifted it back up again as she stood.

There was a vice like clamp attached to the edge of the desk, used to hold wood in place while it's being cut. Perfect, she thought as she righted the stool and stood back on it again. This time she placed the Mask in the vice upside down and spun the handle so the vice clamp held it tightly and firmly in place. Then she climbed onto the desk, because of her small statue she couldn't reach the small handsaw on the wall with her short arms. After picking out the sharpest tool she could lift with her weak arms she returned to the stool and sat on it. She placed the blade of saw just on top of the metal bar between it and the Masks mouth and began to saw back and forth. She held onto the vice for support as she brought the saw back and forth, back and forth, back and forth across the Mask. After about a minute of this she stopped and breathed heavily for a few moments before removing the blade to view her handy work.

Huh? This was odd, there wasn't a mark on it! No small gash or cut, it wasn't scratched and there wasn't even any sawdust on the ground. But what really made her eyes open was the saw itself, it had no teeth anymore, yet she was sure it had teeth before, but now it just looked like a strip of metal that had been gradually worn down over years of use. Considering that she made a mistake choosing this saw she climbed back up onto the desk and removed another saw, checked to see how sharp the teeth were, then tried the same thing again. She got the same result, the Mask was unharmed and the saw was now like a strip of weathered steal.

The Mask was a material object so it should be possible to break it, she reasoned, but the saws failed to cut through it and the heavy hammer did nothing but propelled it into her stomach. Thinking for a minute she had a look at all the other tools she could use. Hedge trimmers? No too dangerous and she could never reach them where she was, plus it would make too much noise. A circular saw maybe? But she didn't know how to work it and she knew dad wouldn't have kept the instructions which he refused to read, also it would make too much noise and she didn't want to wake anyone up. That's when she spotted a little blue crowbar on the floor next to one of Bart's skate board. That was Bart's special crowbar, the one he nicked named 'blue-y' the one she almost used to destroy a fake angle skeleton. It was perfect for the purpose she thought as she got off the stool picked it up from the floor and returned to her work.

She slipped the Mask out of the vice clamp and placed it back in on its edge and tightened the clamp again as tight as she could make it. The crowbar would give her good leverage to snap the stupid thing in half. She stuck the flat end of the crowbar into its eyehole and pulled down with as much strength as she could muster. She couldn't hear anything, not the sound of ancient wood under stress and about to break as she expected, and the Mask didn't even appear to be bending at all. She tried putting her weight on it but still the Mask refused to bend or break. Then finally and probably foolishly she kicked the stool out from under herself so her full weight was put on the Mask.

Her tip toes just touched the ground and she raised them so the infernal thing felt her full weight, pretty soon the inevitable happened. Something had to give way and when it did the crow bar came down on top of Lisa's head with a smack and she tried again to stifle another scream as it did. She collapsed to the floor in a heap, the crowbar clanging to the floor next to her.

She moaned, reached up and felt where the crowbar had hit, there was no blood but she could feel a lump begin to rise under her hair. She sat up on the cold floor and removed her hands from her head and held them out in front of her to make absolutely sure there was no blood. That was when the amused features of the Mask landed perfectly in her open hands, and still it was completely undamaged.

"D'oh!" she gently muttered her father's curse. The clamp must've been what had finally given up and released the Mask tossing it into the air.

Rage started to flood her, rage because the more she tried to do this thing damage the more injuries she seems to sustain, heavy gold falling on her feet, the thing had smacked into her stomach, she's suffered some scrapes and cuts from falling off the stool and now she's got painful lump rising out of her head and it was all for nothing because this thing just refused to break apart.

Hands shaking with furry she hurled the Mask at the floor and it impacted and bounced along the floor still in one piece, still defiantly refusing to break. Lisa got up, slowly walked over to it and jumped up and came down on it with all her force but like last time three weeks ago that action was futile because the Mask didn't even flex or bend under her full weight, not even a nanometre.

_Why wouldn't it just break? Break, break or at least just make a dent! _She thought angrily at it as she bounced up and down on her heels while she still stood on the Mask but still the thing didn't even flex. She stepped off it and still its shape was unchanged. Not only was it not dented in any way it wasn't even chipped, all she had done to it had left no mark on it whatsoever. But everything had a breaking strength, everything broke at some point but this thing seemed to laugh in the face of that theory. The more it resisted her attempts to destroy it the more angry at it she became and the more she was beginning to consider if the Mask itself was as indestructible as it made its wearer, and that only made her more annoyed with it.

She took a few deep breathes to calm her nerves, she ran her hands through her spiky hair and was reminded of the lump forming on her head as pain shot straight across her brain. She breathed in deeply again, she had to think about this logically she reasoned as she picking the thing up again and inspected it.

Maybe this was why the Mask hadn't been destroy long before it came to Springfield, maybe people had tried to but it resisted everything you could throw at it so you had no choice but to let it continue existing as a whole.

The lump on her head began to throb and burn and she winced as she reached out and touched it again. _Wait a minute, burn?_ That's something she hadn't tried yet. The Mask was made of wood and wood burns, maybe she could burn it and reduce it to ashes. A part of her mind wanted to tell her that normal wood would've broken apart after all the stress she put it through but she ignored it. She had to get rid of this thing before Bart or anyone else found out about it and burning it sounded like a logical thing to do.

Leaving the garage she made her way through the kitchen, through the TV area and into the living room, on one side of it stood a big fireplace with logs ready to be set alight, it was perfect she realised as she limped over to it and placed the Mask on top of the wooden logs and... _how do you usually start a fire like this? _She wondered. Matches? _No_, she told herself,_ matches wouldn't do it, I need an accelerant to get it going quickly._

But then she had a brain wave, she remembered how dad once tried to fire up their barbeque using a can of beer. This was perfect only she didn't know if there was any beer left after Santa's Little Helpers quick turn with the Mask when he destroyed and devoured everything inside the fridge. Nevertheless she returned to the kitchen and opened the fridge. It was a mess that was the only way to describe it, an utter mess, it looked like something Homer made when he was trying to make abstract art. But there was what looked like a single, intact can of Duff beer which she snatched up, her luck was changing.

Returning to the living room she opened the can with the ring and it hissed with the release of pressure as she poured the brown liquid over the logs and the Mask until it was all gone. Tossing the empty can aside she now had to figure out how to start the fire. Matches obviously and she knew exactly where to get them.

She went over to Grandpa who still stood in the dining room snoring away and she gingerly reached into his trouser pockets and slowly took out a small pipe that he smoked tobacco with. Grandpa wasn't allowed to smoke for health reasons but that didn't stop him sneaking away to enjoy a puff on his pipe now and again, he was stubborn and that stubbornness gave Lisa a method to ignite the fire because in his pocket, as well as a wad of tobacco was a box of matches.

Smiling at her cleverness she replaced the pipe and the tobacco in Grandpa's pockets and returned to finally finish her task.

Pushing open the small cardboard box she removed one match from the wad of about a dozen and struck it along the length of the box and the friction match ignited. She held it over the beer soaked wood and hesitated. She looked into the Mask's eyes, all that power, all that energy came from such a pathetic looking, mundane object. Now that she looked at it, it almost felt unreal, as if all that happened to her was just a dream and in some cases she wished it only had been. The match burned close to her fingers forcing her to dropped it onto the alcohol soaked wood, no turning back now.

Lisa took a step back, she never expected the fire to be so ferocious when she lit it but she wasn't burnt or hurt as the small match quickly and rapidly spread its fire to cover both the logs and the Mask in its orange flames.

She took a few more steps back and sat on the couch behind her and watched the flames dance over the Mask as it burnt, it looked like it was working. She continued to watch mesmerised by the sight of it, what looked like steam appeared to be blowing off it as the fire cracked and burned it, it was working.

She suddenly felt a slight itch at the back of her neck and reached behind her neck to scratch it. Her fingers brushed against something wrapped around her neck, it wasn't her pearl necklace she could feel, that was underneath it. She found a double hook sort of clasp on it and the itch was caused by one of the hooks poking her in the back of the neck, as she took it off she realised what it was.

It was a collection of bullets, all mangled and strung together like a necklace. It was the necklace she'd made from the bullets the police tried to shoot her with when she was at Burns' mansion. How come it didn't vanish when the Mask came off? The solution became obvious to her when you thought about it, the Mask didn't conjure these bullets up it only altered their shape, they existed before she put the Mask on so they existed afterwards despite what condition they were in.

She was tempted to throw them in the fire with the Mask, but she didn't for two reasons, one, it wouldn't do anything because they were made of metal and so wouldn't burn and two, she decided to keep them, as a reminder that although she considers herself sweet and considerate, there is a very dark creature inside of her. She left the spent bullets on the couch next to her and turned back to watch the Mask burn.

It was odd, but as she was watching this it was as if this was a funeral for her other self, the version of her the Mask unleashed, because without the Mask 'she' could never again return to cause harm to anyone. It was also very quaint that she'd given the Viking object a Viking type funeral, laying it on a pyre and burning it like a Viking warrior.

She sighed and laid her head on the arm of the couch as she watched the fire, the burning and crackling noise it made as well as the orange glow it had seemed to have a very therapeutic nature to it because she felt much calmer and only now was she realising how tired she was having been up most of the night. She yawned but only a little as her heavy feeling eyelids slowly closed as she listened to burning, crackling fire. It was okay to rest her eyes for a few moments, because in a few moments the Mask would be no more.

And in those next moments Lisa was fast asleep.

* * *

**A few hours later**

TV's Kent Brockman was on the scene at Burns' mansion, he was holding a microphone to his mouth and was speaking to the people in TV land as behind him a man lay on the ground clutching his bleeding nose in pain "Behind me, a man lies on the floor with his nose broken" Kent said, then he leaned in closer to the TV screen before stating "That's what you get for pulling faces in the background while I'm reporting!" as a warning.

_Oh my_, Marge thought as she watched this on the TV from the kitchen, _TV violence has spread to the morning news_.

"On a more news related note" Kent said as the camera pulled to the side to give a view of a large building that Marge recognised as Mr. Burns' mansion "Mr. Burns' private billionaire mansion was robbed last night by the notorious _Green Face._ This is _Green Face's_ first attack on the residence of Springfield since the attack on the logging company, three weeks ago."

A picture of the three faces of _Green Face_ came up on the screen, one was a man, tall with plastic looking brown hair, another a boy of around Bart's age with long black hair which was collected into thick spikes and stuck out at odd angles making his hair look like a jesters hat, and a little girl with blond, pointy hair very similar to Lisa's only the points were curved back so they resembled shark fins. All of them were wearing funny looking green, rubber masks, all had larger eyes then usual and all had cartoon style large teeth. Funny though, Marge thought, seeing the pictures separately she didn't think much of them but with all three of them lined up together like this they now looked vaguely familiar.

"According to eye witnesses" Kent went on "the entire Springfield Police department showed up to arrest the shape shifting snatcher when they were attacked by a large collection of small animals, but not before _Green Face_ preformed a song and dance number with the fury little creatures that she seemed to have some sort of control over"

The screen turned to a very pixelated video of the front of Burn's mansion, along the bottom scrolling along the screen in white letters were the words, 'shot by an amateur photographer using his cell phone camera'. Though the screen was pixeled, the sound was clear enough. The video was of the girl version of _Green Face_ singing with a group of animals to a song by Queen. Despite being a very destructive and obviously disturbed young lady she did have a beautiful singing voice, Marge admitted.

The video cut out and went back to TV's Kent Brockman. "We regret we are currently unable to interview any of the police officers involved as they are all in the hospital being given tetanus shots. But _Green Face _didn't stop there last night. No she then turned up at the logging company that she attacked three weeks ago and scared away the workers again. Again we are able to bring you footage from an amateur photographer."

The picture changed again to show trees with horrible frightening looking faces on them, their branches twisted into vague looking hands as they reached down and tried to grab the workers on the ground who were screaming and running away. Again the words 'shot by an amateur photographer using his cell phone camera' scrolled along the bottom of the screen. "It is the opinion of some workers that whoever could make trees behave like this must have plenty of resources to build animatronic-trees like this" The video then focused on the girl _Green Face_ as she laughed out loud like she was a complete loon. Marge was only glad her own kids didn't behave this way.

"Unfortunately the boss, nicknamed 'Derek the lumberjack' was unable to comment because he is currently back in the mental institution and is in no fit condition to speak to anyone at this time. But as a bonus to environmentalist everywhere _Green Face's_ actions have finally convinced multibillionaire tycoon C. Montgomery Burns to halt his destruction of the Springfield forest on the grounds that he now considers it a waste of his time and money."

At was at this point Marge turned the TV off, the children really shouldn't be watching things like this early in the morning, they get enough violence from that cartoon cat and mouse without seeing it happen in the real world. But Lisa will be so happy to hear her precious forest and the animals in it are all safe now that Mr. Burns has backed down.

With the house spotless due to whatever happened last night there was little for Marge to do this morning except make breakfast and feed Maggie.

When Marge had woken up and went down stairs she'd found Lisa on the sofa next to the fireplace, that was burning and snapping quietly to itself with glowing embers still in the pile of ash. Did Lisa start that fire? Marge moaned under her breath, she'd have to talk to Lisa about fire safety and how dangerous it was to play with matches.

She was going to wake Lisa up, but her motherly instincts stopped her. Lisa looked sound asleep softly snoring to herself. Marge had never known Lisa look so tired in the morning and if she didn't know better she'd have suspect that Lisa had been up all night. In the end Marge decided to leave her alone to sleep for a little longer and saw about breakfast for Bart, Maggie and Grandpa, not Homer though, he wouldn't get up until mid day she knew even though he had to go to work.

She got out Bart's favourite cereal, Krusty-O's and left the milk on the table for him to use along with a bowl and spoon ready for when he decided to come down. With that done she'd prepared Grandpa's food, which was similar to Maggies baby food and probably was but with Grandpa was still snoring away in the dining room from last night and didn't look like he was going to wake up any time soon she'd set it aside on the table and let him sleep as well.

Maggie, who sat in her highchair, was biting down on her pacifier still trying to remove the annoying ache in the tooth. But when she saw her mommy coming with a bowl of her food she started rapidly sucking on it gleefully. Marge gently pulled the pacifier out of her mouth and began feeding her baby the mushy baby food with a small, red, plastic spoon.

Maggie opened her mouth and let Marge gently push the mushy, green stuff into her waiting mouth and she chewed for a little while before swallowing. She was about to feed her another spoonful when Maggie suddenly belched, nothing unusual about that except the belch smelled suspiciously like the ham she had in the fridge last night that had mysteriously disappeared along with half the fridges contents. Marge was going to ask the kids or Grandpa about that, whichever woke up first. A lot of strange things must've happened last night, apart from the house being clean and the fridge being empty there was that knife she'd found sticking out of the wall in the living room with no explanation of how it got there. Also, outside the kitchen window, in the garden next to the dogs doghouse was a plastic portable toilet, like the sort you'd put in a construction site. Marge had gone outside to momentarily inspect it and found it to be covered in dirt and soil. Someone had obviously dumped it here, but who and why and did this have anything to do with all the other strange happenings last night?

Marge didn't know what to think when she walked back inside, and she doesn't know what to think now but she'll ask the kids about it when they get up. And as if right on queue Marge heard noises from upstairs, obviously Bart was up because the foot falls were far too quiet to be Homers, but the way they sounded caught her attention. It was as if Bart was sneaking around not wanting to be heard, what was he up to? She wondered as she heard him gingerly start to come down the stairs one step at a time as if afraid to wake some sleeping beast.

There was a beast down here, the beast of fury. Marge was really going to scold him today for playing with knifes last night. She was about ready to confront him the moment he showed his face through the kitchen door but the moment his head did come through the door all that rage ebbed away at the expression on her sons face, it wasn't smirking or happy as it usually was, it looked white and slightly edgy. He looked left and right into the kitchen before entering and sitting down at the table, none of his usual cheeriness or even a hello. He looked awful like he'd been sick.

"Bart, are you alright?" she asked when he began pouring his Krusty-O's into his cereal bowl.

"Alright, alright?" he said quickly with the jitters "Why shouldn't I be alright, I'm fine" he added quickly clearly nervous. Marge's motherly instincts kicked in as she tried to place that knife she'd found in the living room early this morning as the cause of his behaviour, but no scenario she could think of fitted it unless Lisa had come at him with it but that just wasn't right, Lisa might want Bart to suffer a little but stab him, no.

Marge moaned at Bart's unresponsive reply as another figure entered the room with a slight limp in her gate with the pitter patter of her sandals on the floor. Lisa rubbed her sleepy eyes which still had dark circles underneath and yawning widely. Marge turned to open one of the cupboards and take out Lisa's favourite cereal when Marge heard several noises in rapid succession. First she heard a smashing sound, a slosh, a thump of wood on floor and rapidly running footsteps leading from the kitchen back upstairs. When Marge turned around Bart had vanished from the table, his chair tipped up and cereal was all over the floor along with bits of his smashed cereal bowl.

Barts eyes widened the moment he caught sight of her, the terrified look on his face made Lisa feel even worse then she already did. She frowned as Bart leapt from his chair and ran for it, obviously believing she could turn back into that crazy monster even without the Mask on. That pang of guilt for what the Mask made her do to him brought pain to her heart. She didn't want to do all that stuff to him, okay maybe a little of it, but the Mask pushed her too far. She wanted to speak to him, to say she was sorry for it, that it wasn't her doing it and that the curse that brought out that side of her was no more.

Lisa sighed in relief, the Mask was destroyed, when she'd woken up she inspected the fire, the wooden logs were now just lumps of glowing ash clumps and the Mask appeared to be gone, even the metal bar appeared to have vanished as well. She'd poked at the ash mound with a poker causing the clumps to collapse in on themselves before she was satisfied the curse was gone once and for all.

She wiggled her toes in her sandals, her feet were really swollen now and they ached quite badly, she might have to go to the hospital to get them x-rayed for broken bones, she thought. As she sat down at the table she knew mom wanted to speak to her before she'd even opened her mouth. She suspected she wanted to know why she'd set the fire going and was sleeping on the couch downstairs. She had a good excuse to neither of those questions and she was in no fit state of mind to even think about one. But the question she got was not one she had expected.

"Lisa, do you know why there was a knife stuck in the wall in the living room?"

Knife? In the living room? She thought lazily, what was she talking about? She thought back to the previous night and then she remembered, it was Sideshow Bob's knife, the one he'd tried to kill her with while she was wearing the Mask and the same one she'd flung at him a few moments after. She'd completely forgotten about it in her mischief driven from. That was probably the thing she'd realised she had forgotten before.

"Do you know who did it?" Marge asked her.

_Yeah, I do _said that little voice in her head she had come to associate with her inner self_ It was Sideshow Bob, with the knife, in the living room_ Lisa's lips curled into a slight smile as the depths of her own mind thought this up, she actually thought it was a little funny, but she chose not to use that excuse. She couldn't say it was Sideshow Bob last night trying to kill them, she'd never believe that but what could she say to explain away the knife? Her thoughts turned to _blame it on Bart_ but she dismissed the idea because she wanted to make peace with her brother and blaming him for a knife in a wall was not the best thing to do.

"Lisa?" Marge asked as Lisa slowly lowered her eyelids. It was the only way out of it she could think of without actually answering it. Closing her eyes she pretended to go back to sleep, and in a few minutes, due to her still fatigued state, she was.

* * *

"My, my what a healthy X-ray" said Dr. Hibbert, a cheery sounding black man. He was holding in his hand the X-ray of Police Chief Wiggum's left arm, which both ached and felt very swollen. Wiggum had injured it while trying to escape the fleet of animals that descended upon the police force last night. He'd fallen over because _Green Face_ had taken his belt and when he tried to run, his pants fell down around his ankles and he felt over onto the pavement, that's when it must've happened he reasoned. He checked himself in for an X-Ray the next morning when it started to swell and wouldn't stop throbbing, to make sure nothing was wrong and by the sound of Dr. Hibbert everything was fine.

"Yes sir, this is one of the healthiest X-rays I've ever seen" Dr. Hibbert said as he put down one x-ray and lifted up another "But when we compare this to your X-ray" he said as he slotted it into a clip over a box with a light so they could both see it clearly. "We see a minor break in the humerus or funny bone." Wiggum rubbed his aching arm as Hibbert went on. "I'm afraid that arm will have to go in a cast for the next few weeks." He lightly chuckled to himself for no reason.

"Oh man, damn" Wiggum cursed "Can't you just give me a placebo or something?"

"I sure could" Hibbert said as he turned and went into a cupboard in his clean clinic, picked up a bottle and returned to him. Wiggum was relieved that he didn't have to be in a cast if this thing would make him feel better. Hibbert opened a small bottle and dropped a small tablet into Wiggums hand.

"Okay, so I take this and my arm will get better?" he asked as he popped it in his mouth and swallowed it. Dr. Hibbery chuckled as he usually did.

"No" he said, abruptly cutting off his own laughter "you just asked for one, I never claimed it'd do anything"

"Oh, very funny" Wiggum said rubbing his arm again. Wiggum didn't want to be bound in a cast for the next three weeks. The last time his arm was bound he'd suffered an irritating itch for days that he just couldn't get at. Ever worse was when some wise guy, while he was on a visit to Springfield Elementary school to do a talk about misbehaving in the real world, managed to write the word 'I am a wiener' on it clearly were it could be seen. Wiggum didn't notice this even while he was in front of an entire assembly of pupils lecturing them that crime didn't pay, and at the same time wondering why they were all giggling at him.

"Don't worry" Dr. Hibbert said "We'll have that arm wrapped up like a mummy in no time" he chuckled again and Wiggum sighed as Dr. Hibbert left the room to get someone to bandage and cast his arm.

They had been so close last night to finally nabbing _Green Face_ once and for all, they had the trap and the bait, then suddenly _Green Face_ decided to attack Mr. Burns instead and that threw all the planning out the window.

This guy was tricky, very, very tricky, sometimes he was a guy sometimes he was a girl. But his motivations keep changing, like he's got some kind of multiple personality disorder. Maybe they should get someone to do a criminal profile on this guy understand how he works and how he thinks, then maybe they could predict what his next move would be. That had been Lou's idea, an idea Wiggum had at first pushed aside because he thought given more men and firepower they could bring this guy down, but since that had failed Wiggum was close to swallowing his pride and getting some kind of psychoanalyst to take a look at the case.

The door of the office opened again and Dr. Hibbert stood outside for a moment with a much shorter looking man with black hair and a thin beard, a name tag on his lapel read 'Dr. Nick Riviera'. Dr. Hibbert was holding a clipboard close to his nose before turning back to his college and Wiggum listened to their conversation.

"You know I don't like the look of these charts Dr. Nick" Hibbert said passing the clipboard to his shorter college. Was Dr. Hibbert talking about him, what was wrong about his charts, what was Hibbert not telling him?

"I know what you mean Dr. Hibbert." Dr. Nick said a look of concern on his face "I don't like the look of the charts either. Lady Gaga at number one, who'd have thought it?" Wiggum gave a slight sigh of relief at this misunderstanding as Dr. Nick continued to speak. "Especially after all the operations I did on him"

"'Her' you mean" Hibbert interrupted "Lady Gaga's a girl"

"Whatever you say!" Dr. Nick said cheerily before he turned and left his college. Dr. Hibbert finally entered his office followed by a Nurse who had been out of sight around the other side of the corridor.

"Well now Chief Wiggum" Dr. Hibbert said "Jenny here will cast your arm and I will write my bill" he chuckled again and in no time Wiggum had his arm in a cast and sling. Now walking down the corridor towards the exit Wiggum was constantly thinking _Don't itch, don't itch, don't itch, don't itch, OH NO THERES AN ITCH_. An itch in his arm and he just couldn't scratch it while it was under his cast.

He was so focused on scratching his encased arm he nearly walked into someone leaving another office.

"Oh, excuse me" Wiggum said as he took a step back from the lady. He knew who that was, that tall blue hair was unmistakable as Marge Simpson, former Police Officer of the Springfield police department, she left the police force after she claimed there was too much corruption on the force, and of course she was right. She was also the wife of local repeat offender Homer Simpson, busted on several counts of drink-driving, only one of which turned out to be a false alarm when Homer offered him the last donut in his box.

"Oh! Sorry Chief Wiggum" Marge replied as another figure stepped into view from the door. It looked like one of Ralph's little friends, Lisa, Wiggum thought her name was. She looked very tired, was limping very awkwardly and her feet were bandaged quite tightly.

"And what's happened to little Lisa?" he asked and at the sight of Chief Wiggum Lisa almost looked like she was going to scream in surprise, she jumped back and tried to flatten herself against her mother's legs. Wiggum chuckled. "Don't worry Lisa, I only arrest people who've done bad things" he said in the same reassuring voice he'd speak to Ralph in, but Lisa did not look reassured.

"Something heavy landed on her feet last night" Marge explained, "Nothing serious, just a few bruises and swollen feet. The doctor just said to keep her feet wrapped up and put cold ice packs on it until the swelling goes down."

Wiggum laughed his piggish laugh. "Yeah kids can be accident prone, my Ralphy last night bit his tongue and thought it was going to swell up and block his mouth." Wiggum couldn't understand why Lisa stilled looked uncomfortable around him, and... it was odd but the more he looked at her the more she seemed... familiar somehow.

"What happened to your arm?" Marge then asked right at the moment when something was about to click in Wiggum's head, but now it was gone. "Oh this?" he said rising his cast arm "I broke my arm chasing after that _Green Face_ menace last night, nothing serious but I have to spend the next few weeks in this cast."

Marge did that little moan she usually did when something was on her mind. "Wiggum I hope the news isn't going to glamorise that menace, kids get enough ideas watching those violent cartoons to see someone roughly their age committing such acts in real life."

"Oh, don't you worry Mrs. Simpson" Wiggum said assuredly "Me and my boys are onto _Green Face,_ forensics are combing the area around Burns' mansion, any day now were expecting a breakthrough that will bring him in" he lied, he had to make the public feel safe after all.

He ruffled Lisa's hair, said goodbye to Marge and left the hospital. Only after he got back to his car did he realise he forgot to warn them about Sideshow Bob escaping a few weeks ago. Oh well, he'll tell them the next time he sees them.

* * *

Homer yawned loudly as he lay on the couch in the TV area watching TV. Today was the day, the baseball game to end all baseball games, or in his mind at least. It was the Springfield Isotopes on a rematch with the Shelbyville team what-cha-call-em? They were Springfields greatest rivals and this was it, they had to win this and Homer had to watch.

Ideally for a Saturday he would've slept in until noon, especially after the night he'd had. Lousy Lawn Competition, sending fake invitations out to attract people and make fools of them.

Oh well, at least there was nothing stopping him from watching the game today, except work, and he sorted that out easily. Before the game started he'd called the power plant.

"You have reached the Springfield nuclear plant" a voice had said at the other end "If you are phoning because you think a mistake was made with you electricity bill, go speak to someone who cares. If you are calling about a family member, get off the line, they're busy. If you're calling about something else, please stay on the line, you will be charged for this call." After about fifty minutes someone finally answered.

"Hello" it said.

"This is Homer J. Simpson, I can't come in today because umm..." Homer thought for a moment, he hadn't planned ahead any kind of excuse so he had to think quickly "...I've been hit by a car and I'm in a coma dreaming I'm in 1973" then he slammed the phone down "Whoohoo!" he cheered "I've got the day off!"

To celebrate he reached beyond the phone and grasped the handle of the fridge, which he had moved from its usual spot in the kitchen next to the couch in the TV area to make beer easily accessible and didn't require that little walk to get it. Opening the fridge he took out a cool can of Duff beer and closed the door again. Marge had cleaned out the fridge after whatever the kids did to it last night, -though Homer had insisted that it had been the ghost Slimer-. Then she'd gone out down to the Kwik-E-Mart to restock the now empty fridge, a fridge with no contents in it was a very sad sight in Homers mind. So to make it a less depressing sight he'd filled it full of cans of Duff and brought it here to keep an eye on it in case the mischievous ghost came back for seconds.

He closed the fridge and opened the can and drank from the tasty, sweet liquid on the inside, the only thing that could make beer any better was... he thought for a moment... more beer, he concluded.

As Homer laid back to put his feet up he felt something crackling under his backside and curiously he reached under his backside and pulled out a piece of paper. Oh right, he realised, this was the list of chores Marge wanted him to do around the house while she was out. Clean garage, wash pots in the sink, vacuum downstairs, but the first thing on the top of the list was clean out the fireplace.

Apparently Lisa had started a fire there last night, why, neither of them knew and they couldn't ask her because she was too tired. After breakfast she'd gone back up to her bedroom to sleep off whatever was wrong with her for a while, before she came back down stairs and asked to have her feet seen to because they were swelling up. At least she wasn't blowing on the damn saxa-ma-phone thing again, not while Springfield was playing Shelbyville.

He took another grateful swig of beer as he watched the game, Springfield was doing well he thought, they were gaining a point every minute, or so he thought until he realised he was looking at the clock in the bottom left of the screen. Twenty minutes later came half time.

He stood up and stretched his limbs, he might as well start on these chores he reckoned, before the second half comes on.

He changed his clothes because this was going to be messy work. It took him ten minutes to squeeze into pants that had become a size too small since he last wore them. Then came back down stairs and had another drink of sweet Duff to cool him down after that struggle to get into his tight trousers, which made his legs look very narrow and squeezed his stomach at the waist causing his fat to balloon up above his waist and spill over the top of his trousers. Once the last drop of Duff went down his throat the pants couldn't take the pressure anymore and sprang open and ripped in several places.

"D'oh!" he moaned as he went back upstairs and put on another pair of work pants. Now he was ready to tackle the fire he decided as he walked over to the fireplace in the living room and stopped for a second to regard it as a thought came into his head... How the heck do you clean stuff? He didn't know, he just didn't clean stuff, to him cleaning was as alien to him as the alien in aliens.

He reached in and took a lump of wood from the fire that crumbled to ash in his hands and spread itself out on the carpet.

"Oh uh" he though as he scooped the mound back up and tossed it back into the fire, still leaving a big dirty patch in the carpet.

"And we're back!" said the TV, halftime was over so soon? But he hasn't done anything yet. Panicking he began bouncing from side to side on his heels looking down at the fireplace then back at the TV area where the game was running again. What should he do? Marge asked him to do these things, but the whole reason he stayed at home today was to watch the game.

After a brief moment he came to a decision. He was going to go back and watch the game. After all he was taking Marge out tonight surely that classed as a chore.

* * *

**1:10pm**

Lisa gently dozed on her comfortable bed with a pair of ice packs on her swollen feet. She had slept for most of the day, or more dozed for most of the day, even in the doctor's clink. She had been much too tired to do anything during the morning because she had been out all night, out all night wearing the Mask, sure, but she still felt the fatigue of the night once she'd removed it.

Bart was still avoiding her, probably scared that she'd become that psychopath again if he got too close, even though it was currently day. Didn't he know the Mask only works at night? Possibly not, he only wore it the one time and never tried it on again after that since she stole it from him that morning before he woke up.

Now though she didn't have to worry about the Mask anymore, but she still wanted to apologise to Bart and make him understand it wasn't 'her' in control of herself at the time. How could she explain to an eleven year old boy who couldn't even understand long division that the Mask brings out what's lurking deep inside your head, something that is usually restrained. It hardly mattered because every time she tried to talk to him he'd run off as if she had the plague or something.

It hadn't been all bad today though, she thought because she'd heard on the radio while driving home that Burns had actually given up his mission to destroy the Springfield forest, she'd won, she'd actually managed to save the entire forest single handed. The sad part was that her counterpart locked in her head had been right, her actions did speak louder than Lisa's words.

She'd trashed Burns' mansion injured dozens of police officers and stolen stuff from Burns' mansion, stuff she was foolish enough to bring back with her.

She thought for a moment about all that gold she brought home, what had she been thinking? She couldn't sell it, she couldn't use it, why did she take it? Her mind ran through possible scenario's to get rid of it. Throw it in the river? Bury it in the forest?

Before she asked mom to take her to a doctor she moved and re-hid the gold bars she'd found, this time placing them under the floorboards in that little secret place she'd kept the Mask for all those weeks. It was a much safer place then under her bed where anybody could find them. It had taken her a while with the pain still ringing in her feet, but as soon as they were truly hidden she asked mom to be taken to see a doctor. They'd x-rayed her feet and found no broken bones, just swelling thank goodness. Lisa's explanation for her swollen feet was that while she was kidding around she knocked the TV over and it landed on her feet. She'd said she thought nothing of it at the time until this morning when her feet started to swell up.

That had been a good enough lie to convince mom, but she still kept pressing her about why she lit a fire in the fireplace and why did she find a knife sticking out of the wall in the living room. Lisa's brain was running on empty and hadn't been able to come up with a good enough lie, so she just pretended to be tired again.

Now back home she dozed a little and thought about how she could get rid of that gold permanently, the problem was the stuff was very heavy and she could only manage one at a time in her backpack without falling back onto her back. Why did she have to destroy the Mask so soon? If she could only use it one last time she could've gotten rid of all this stuff?

_NO_, she thought firmly to herself, _no, the Mask was too dangerous and anyway it's gone, gone for good._

* * *

**1:34pm**

Marge came into the house carrying bags of groceries and food in both her arms while trying to balance Maggie on her left. She closed the door behind her using her foot because her hands were full and went into the kitchen to restock the fridge.

After going to the hospital with Lisa Marge intended to go to the Kwik-E-Mart, but first she'd dropped her daughter off at home because it was on the way and she looked like she needed to rest.

The Kwik-E-Mart was ran by an Indian called Apu Nahasapeemapetilon, a friend of the family since the Simpsons often helped him out in troubled times, but despite that he still insisted on charging full price for groceries, $4.50 for milk? $5.25 for carrots? Marge knew there was a recession on but Apu's prices were just ridicules. If it wasn't for the fact Apu was the only store in town that sold tofu, the only meat substitute Lisa would eat being a vegetarian, then she'd probably shop at the Meg-A-Mart across town.

Marge put down the brown paper bags of groceries and sat Maggie down in her high chair before turning to the fridge. But it was gone, there was nothing there except the filthy looking wall behind it and its power cable which snaked away and went into the TV room where she could see the green kitchen appliance just blocking the entrance to the TV area.

Moaning, Marge tried to squeeze past the large green box and found Homer sitting on the couch watching TV.

"Homer!" Marge said attracting his attention

"Yes honey?" Homer said sounding innocent

"Why on earth did you move the fridge in here?" she asked,

"Saves time" Homer said taking a sip of Duff beer he had in his hands, and when Marge gave him the look that said she didn't have the slightest idea what he was talking about he said "Marge the games on in here and the fridge is in there, and I don't want to walk all the way over there for beer. Besides Lisa always said we need to conserve energy." Marge didn't know if Homer was joking or being serious.

Homer opened the fridge revealing all the shelves stacked up with cans of Duff beer. He took one out and opened it up again.

"See" he said as if this proved his argument "Saves time. That's why I moved a toilet in here as well"

Marge gave a little yelp of surprise, on the other side of the couch was that filthy portable toilet from outside. How did he manage to get that in here?

"Homer, put these things back and get 'that'" she pointed at the portable toilet "out of my house" she insisted

"Oh, but Marge" Homer moaned as if he was speaking to his mother, but Marge stood firm. She loved Homer but sometimes he just had to make things so difficult.

Mopping Homer did eventually put the fridge back, but only after a commercial break came on. He pushed it back into place on the far wall, emptied it of beer and went back into the TV area to remove that filthy toilet back outside.

With this done Marge set about unpacking her groceries, completely restocking the fridge after whatever happened last night. She still never got the chance to ask the kids what the heck happened last night because Lisa was so tired she couldn't answer, but her motherly instincts told her she was trying to avoid talking about it, and Bart seemed too frighten to tell her anything, Grandpa, who woke up at 10:00am couldn't remember anything that happened last night, that left only Maggie and she couldn't talk yet.

After packing away the groceries she turned her attention to the sink, it was still full of pots and cups and after she left Homer a list of things to do! Shaking her head she quickly washed them herself. It wasn't just the pots he didn't wash, he didn't vacuum the carpets either, she was a mom so she could tell.

"Homer, I thought I asked you to wash these!" she shouted at him while she was drying the last cup from the sink, but he didn't answer, she shouted again and still he didn't answer.

After putting away the cup in a cupboard Marge went into the TV area, the filthy portable toilet was gone, but only its shell was missing, the toilet part of it was still in there and Homer was sitting on it, pants around his ankles still watching the game.

"Homer!" she shouted

"Hey, do you mind!" Homer shouted back holding a roll of toilet paper in his hands, disgusted Marge instantly left the room her annoyance at Homer rising even further.

He had the strength to move a fridge and a toilet into the TV area so he could watch the game with no interruptions yet he didn't have the strength to push a vacuum around the house or wash pots or...? He didn't even clean out the fireplace she realised as she walked into the living room.

Moaning again Marge turned to Homer who she could see just sitting on the toilet staring blindly at the stupid baseball game. He wasn't going to do it she decided, so in the end she'd have to clean up this mess herself. It wasn't a big job at least, all it needed was the ash sweeping away and the base cleaned.

She returned to the kitchen and picked up a dust pan and brush from a collection of cleaning appliances she kept under the sink and returned to the living room. She began sweeping away all ash and debits into the pan and emptied them into a waiting trash can by her side. She still couldn't understand why Lisa had lit this fire in the first place, especially since she was so against burning fossil fuels and had insisted time and time again that they get a fake looking electric fire –Marge just didn't have the heart to remind her were the electricity for an electric fire actually comes from- so it didn't make sense why she'd light it, unless she didn't, but then why was she down here in front of it?

She cleaned away the last of the ash from the fire and was about to stock it with more logs from a wrack next to the fire when she spotted something, something jet black and stuck behind the metal thing that held the logs in place in the fire. Whatever it was it somehow didn't get burnt with the rest of the wood, it was difficult to see it was even there in its current position, but Marge was a mom and a mom could spot things other's couldn't.

Curiously she reached over and grasped it and gently pulled it out, it was made of wood she could tell, wood that hadn't burned it had a curved shape to it, like the hull of a model boat, but the wood was rough like the bark of a tree. As she pulled it out she saw what it was, it was blackened and covered in soot but there was no mistaking that mischievous looking expression that she remember it quite vividly or that odd metal bar running halfway down its face riveted onto the wood. It was that ancient looking mask Homer bought for Bart for his birthday, what on earth was it doing in the fire?

* * *

**To be continued...**

* * *

**Author's notes:** Though it's never shown in the movie, the Mask cannot be so easily destroyed, if it can be at all.

Though the first Homer part in this chapter was unnecessary, I wanted to momentarily fool the readers into thinking Homer was going to get the Mask again :D


	18. The Night on the Town

**Chapter 17**

**The Night on the Town.**

What on earth was it doing in the fire? Marge pondered as she turned the ancient mask in her hands, its soot covered surface leaving black soot marks on her fingers, it was utterly filthy. Marge never did like this thing when Homer got it for Bart three weeks ago because it looked old, dirty and infested, but she let Bart keep it because he seemed genuinely pleased with it, but then why was it in the fire? She wondered. Did Lisa put it in there or did Bart just get tired of it? He did have a disregard for his own toys at times, but she supposed it was possible that it fell in by accident and through some miracle it hadn't been burnt.

Marge in the end decided to give this back to Bart, if it turns out he didn't want it anymore then she could just throw it out but first she was going to give this thing a very thorough clean.

After finishing with the fireplace Marge took the dust pan, the brush, the trash can and the Mask into the kitchen and stored her cleaning items back under the sink and put the soot covered mask down next to the sink which to her dismay was now riddled with empty beer cans, Marge moaned softly. Lisa had been badgering them for months about recycling used cans instead of just crumpling them up and tossing them into a rubbish bin. After months of their daughters moaning Marge and Homer both agreed to recycle. They never exactly had a shortage of cans since Homer drinks every day of the week but the problem was you had to wash them out before placing them into a bag to be taken down to the recycling plant, otherwise they wouldn't accept them.

Moaning again Marge placed the Mask into the mass of used cans and decided to begin the task of washing and rinsing them out. It wasn't exactly time consuming but Marge just saw these things as rubbish that should go in the trash, not cleaned and taken to a recycling plant, if people were so into recycling then why couldn't they just hire people to clean the stuff out themselves? But she kept this all bottled up because she didn't want to upset Lisa, their little environmentalist.

After washing the cans she placed them directly into a waiting recycling bag rather then put them on the draining board and dry them, that part was unnecessary and probably a very difficult task considering the beer cans shape.

At that moment the pitter patter of plastic sandals was heard on the kitchen floor as Marge continued to wash the cans one by one. Lisa was finally up, the sleepy child now looked much more wakeful then she did this morning. She yawned as she lightly limped into the kitchen on her bandaged feet. She spotted the tin cans on the counter next to the sink and she looked genuinely excited by the sight of them.

"Are those the first cans for the recycling plant?" Lisa asked hopefully quickly limping over to the counter. Though she couldn't see what was on top of it because of her short stature she could probably see a few beer cans on the edge. Marge nodded her agreement, full of half and false excitement.

"They sure are." Marge said as she picked up the last tin can, rinsed it and placed it in the bag with the rest before she decided to pick up and wash the filthy looking mask.

"This is the newest chapter in the life of the Simpsons!" Lisa stated as she turned away just before the Mask came into her field of vision "The Simpsons are slowly becoming a green family."

Marge immersed the Mask in the sink which was full of water and decided to let it soak while she turned back to Lisa. Now that her daughter was awake she had a few questions to ask her.

"Lisa, I really want to talk to you about last night" Marge said firmly and Lisa turned to look at her an almost panicked look in her eyes.

"Sorry, mom I've got things to do today and I really didn't get much sleep last night as me later" she said in rapid succession while trying to turn and walk away, but Marge put a hand on her shoulder and turned her around to face her, it was obvious Lisa wasn't going to tell her what happened unless she used some motherly persuasion.

"Lisa, you'll tell me now!" she said sternly, "Why was the fridge a disaster area, why was there a knife in the living room wall, why did you light a fire after I went to bed and why is Bart scared out of his mind?"

Lisa looked like she was having some kind of internal struggle with herself, like she really did want to tell her everything that happened last night but for some reason couldn't, or wouldn't. She actually looked anxious and frightened herself. This scared Marge more than anything, the fact that Lisa just wouldn't say anything out of what looked like fear.

"Oh Lisa" Marge said adopting a more protective motherly tone "you can tell me." Again Lisa looked like she'd say everything but something was forcing her to keep it all bottled up inside, what could've been so terrible that her daughter wouldn't say anything?

Lisa swallowed and simply said "Just be thankful that last night will 'never' happen again" she said this with such certainty that it only raised more questions in Marge's mind. Before she could stop her Lisa turned and slowly limped away.

Marge moaned at Lisa's uncooperativeness, hopefully when Bart feels like talking he will be more open with her.

Marge turned and went back to the sink to wash that filthy mask. Actually that's something she forgot to ask Lisa, why was this thing in the fire in the first place?

* * *

Lisa climbed the stairs and approached Bart's bedroom door. She had been putting this off all day but now she decided it was time to face him. She could only imagine how he must be feeling after she attacked him like 'she' did.

Gulping she approached the door and knocked lightly three times.

"Bart?" she called, she became very nervous as she spoke "Listen Bart I want to talk to you" she said in a voice which she hoped sounded disarming and harmless. She knew Bart was in there, he had not come out of his bedroom since this morning fearing Lisa would attack him again.

"Bart, look... what I did last night..." she paused "I didn't mean it, it was just the Mask, it does that to you, it messes with your mind and turns you into whatever's deep inside your mind." She stopped and listened, there was no movement she could hear happening beyond that door. "You've worn it, you must've felt the thing playing with you" still no answer. "Well, listen I just came here to say... I'm sorry, sorry for what it made me do to you. If I had been in my right mind I wouldn't have done it. But don't worry, that version of me will never show itself again." She paused again before saying "I've destroyed the Mask, I tossed it into the fire and burnt it, it'll never hurt us again."

She was hoping that statement would at least get a reaction out of him, but still he did not reply. Lisa decided to give her brother more time, time was always a great healer, she thought.

_Unless you have a rash, in which case you're better off with ointment _her mind said, at least that voice in her head had become tamer and more under control but it still came out with the wrong things at the wrong time. Lisa didn't laugh at its joke, instead she sighed and walked away from the door.

Bart opened the door a crack and watched his crazed sister walk away and back into her own room. She didn't fool him, she still had the Mask. She wanted its power all to herself, why else would she keep it from him? She said she'd destroyed it or lost it the last time, it had been a lie before and he knew she was lying again. She still had the Mask and he knew it and she was waiting for the right moment for him to show himself before she put it on and decided to finish the job she started.

He hated Lisa more than usual now, she was a complete psycho, completely nuts, insane. There had been times when Lisa would go completely loopy, but she was more often a danger to herself to anyone else, but now Lisa had gone totally bananas and nearly killed him several times.

Lisa didn't look like she was wearing that mask at the minute, but Bart knew you could disguise that green head, she could be wearing the Mask right now and he'd never know until she pulled a fire axe from her dress and tried to chop him in half like an Itchy and Scratchy cartoon.

He wanted to tell his mom what she'd done to him but he was too afraid while Lisa was around, she'd murder him before he could get the first word out. But very soon his luck looked like it was changing, because coming up the stairs was his mom, he could see her reflection in the pictures on the walls, this was his chance to tell her everything that happened last night.

He opened the door fully and closed it behind him and slowly approached his mom, aware that this might be a trap set up by Lisa to finally get him.

* * *

After washing that stubborn mask Marge had ironed clothes she'd left in the washing machfine and after folding them up in a laundry basket intended to take them back upstairs and sort them out. Before she took them upstairs however she piled some things she wanted to take upstairs on top of those clothes, like extra toilet roll and toothpaste for the upstairs bathroom as well as that wooden Mask.

She slowly carried them upstairs carefully because she had stacked the clothes quite high in the basket and looked like they'd fall over any second. She took them into her bedroom and put the basket down on the bed where she intended to sort the clothes into piles depending on who they belonged to before taking them to the correct rooms. She took the toiletries off the top of the pile and placed them on the bed.

"Mom?" said a voice behind her and she turned to see Bart still in his green pyjamas, a look of caution across his face as he approached.

"Oh Bart, I want to talk to you" Marge said and Bart looked over his shoulder as if afraid of something coming up from behind him. As Marge turned back to give Bart his wooden mask back she knocked into the over stacked clothes pile and the tower of clothes toppled over onto the floor.

"Whoops!" she said as she knelt down to pick up the clothes she had so carefully washed, ironed and folded, which now littered the floor. She picked up every item of clothing from the floor, but where was that wooden mask of Barts? She'd picked up every piece of clothing that had fallen from the basket, the socks, the underwear, the shirts, dresses, etc, but there was no sign of that Mask, where could it have gone?

"Mom, I need to talk to you!" Bart said urgently and Marge following her motherly instincts and left the thing wherever it ended up because it sounded like something was wrong with her baby, she stood back up all thoughts of that wooden mask forgotten.

"What is it Bart?" she asked, was he guilty and wanted to admit he had been playing with knifes last night? It didn't sound like him to apologise like that, that was assuming if he was.

Bart opened his mouth to speak, but the sound of a door opening caught his attention followed by a long creak as it opened. Being a mom, Marge knew each of the doors in this house made a distinctive creaking noise, and that creak sounded like Lisa's bedroom door.

Lisa entered the hall and caught sight of both Bart and Marge. Bart's face went extremely pale and his eyes widened with horror. Quicker then Marge had ever seen Bart move he'd ran away back into his room and slammed the door closed. Why were her kids acting so strange today? First Lisa panics at the sight of Police Chief Wiggum then Bart panics at the sight of Lisa.

The spiky haired Simpson looked blue and disappointed as she looked at Bart's bedroom door before she turned around and re-entered her own bedroom, Marge could see tears welling up in her eyes before her door closed. This was getting out of hand, why were they acting like this?

Marge moaned before she continued sorting and folding the clothes from the basket she had to finish all those chores Homer was supposed to do instead of watching the game, then she had to get ready for the night on the town Homer promised.

She'd managed to twist his arm and make him promise to take her to that new place which opened a few months back down by the harbour, it was simply called 'the Copacabana' and by the reviews of it, it sounded like the best club in town that you didn't have to pay to get inside.

* * *

**4:00pm**

This day couldn't get any worse Wiggum knew, but it was about to get very boring he knew because they had a visitor who sounded very boring.

When Wiggum arrived back at the police station countless police officers offered to sign his cast and he allowed them to except he didn't expect anyone would write what someone had on his arm. Someone had written, 'Get well soon Police Chief **Pig**gum' on the side where it could easily be seen. Then he had to talk to thousands of reporters who were keen on knowing more about this _Green Face_ trouble maker, it was only then he realised something was wrong when one of the reporters actually called him **Pig**gum.

Wiggum had assured them that they are doing all they could to capture this guy and had just drafted in a psychoanalyst to help build up a criminal profile on him. That's when Wiggum knew the rest of the day was about to get very boring. The original psychoanalyst they contacted was a Dr. Marvin Monroe, however he turned out to be unavailable because he was either very unwell or was dead, for some reason they couldn't find out which was true, but either way they needed a replacement.

Instead they had to ask for help from another psychoanalyst who just so happened to be at Shelbyville University at the time to perform a psychology lecture and was only too glad to come in to Springfield to help profile this elusive _Green Face, _though he didn't sound too enthusiastic about it and now that Wiggum had met him he didn't sound very enthusiastic about anything. Dr. Arthur Neuman had travelled a great distance all the way from some place called Edge City so a few miles didn't seem to matter to him, in fact very little seemed to matter to him.

Dr. Neuman was a short man with a low, monotone voice that could send cats to sleep. He also had lazy looking eyes and a larger then average head which had short, thinning hair all over. He looked like a collage professor with his tweed jacket and bowtie and as pair of bottle top glasses. Wiggum just couldn't put his finger on it, but something was odd with his face, like it somehow wasn't on straight or something like that.

Either way Wiggum had showed him to the briefing room where the doctor quickly started to read the case file on _Green Face._ Lou and Eddie were also present since this was their case as well as Wiggums.

"Hmm." Dr. Neuman murmured for the millionth time as he looked at both the case files in his hands and at the spider diagram of information on the board in front of him that related _Green Face_ to places like Springfield Elementary, Burns' mansion and so on. "This is an interesting case Mr. Wiggum"

"Chief Wiggum" Wiggum corrected.

"The way I see it Mr. Wiggum" Neuman continued ignoring the Police Chiefs correction "_Green Face_ looks more like three separate individuals sharing similar green masks." Neuman said in his boring sounding monotone "You say their motives and forms constantly shift, but whenever the person in question appears in the girls form she acts like an environmentalist, when the boy shows up he acts mischievously, and the adult behaves like someone with anger management problems. Three forms with their own unique personalities therefore they are logically three different people so I don't understand why you assumed this was one individual."

"But _Green Face _was capable of shifting his form, I've seen him warp his body and change his appearance completely." Wiggum explained, remembering his first encounter with the green faced freak when he was in the adult male form.

"Well, Mr. Wiggum I theorise this has nothing to do with magic, if you think about it these tricks can easily be placed" he said as he put down the case file on a nearby desk and turned to regard him with those boring looking eyes "Smoke and mirrors and carefully planned magic tricks only give the appearance of magic."

"Well I don't recall seeing any smoky mirrors whenever he's around" Wiggum said peevishly.

"If you could see them then the trick wouldn't have the desired effect" Neuman said clearly not even phased by Wiggums outburst.

"So you're saying it's all magic tricks and smoke and mirrors?" Lou asked as he leaned on the edge of a desk. Neuman just nodded. "What about the animals?" Lou asked "Last night the girl got animals to sing and dance with her, and don't say it was an hallucination because we've got video evidence, how do you explain that?"

"The animals were probably midgets, oh excuse me" Neuman corrected himself "'people of reduced stature' I should say, in costumes. They only appeared small probably because they were further away. It's a well known optical illusion used in the film industry to make larger objects appear smaller or larger than they are."

This little know-it-all was really starting to irritate Wiggum, all he wanted was someone to tell him where _Green Face_ would strike next, not how he was doing all these magic tricks. Tricks that felt very real to him but Dr. Neuman just refused to accept that's what happened. Wiggum voiced his irritation to Neuman who only continued to patronise him further.

"It's understandable you'd be confused" the egghead went on, his voice still in that annoying monotone "Back in Edge City we had a similar case back in 1990's. A green faced man calling himself _the Mask_ convinced the entire police force that he was some kind of supernatural creature capable of bending reality and forcing them to do his will, such as sing and dance in the street. I however worked out he was just a very disturbed individual using simple magic tricks to blind the police force and make them fear him."

"Okay Mr. Smarty Pants" Wiggum said in a challenging tone "How do we catch him? What would be his next move?"

"As I've told you, you're _Green Face_ is not one person but three unique individuals. The male is a violent person with anger management problems, the boy is a mischievous joker who likes causing trouble and the girl appears to be suffering from some kind of inferiority complex that's causing her to lash out at society. Though all three of them are different, they have one thing in common."

"Yeah, and that is?" Wiggum asked

"They all behave like their psyche are incomplete, like they've had their social limiters removed, the parts used that restrain our behaviour and suppress the ID allowing us to adopt an image more acceptable to society." Neuman explained

"How does this help us catch him, or them?" Wiggum asked

"Oh, it doesn't, but it is a fascinating psychological puzzle, and one I might use in my next book." Neuman said as he held up his hand to stop any argument "but if I were you I'd investigate organisations in Springfield big enough to both afford the manpower and resources to pull off such complex magic tricks for these people."

Wiggum sighed and rubbed his eyes with his right hand, Neuman hadn't been there, he didn't know how real these 'simple magic tricks' felt and he wasn't being much of a help to their effort.

"Hey" Lou said getting Wiggums attention "either listen to the man or just Google, 'who done it?' again"

"Okay, okay" Wiggum admitted "I admit Google wasn't the most reliable resource in the police tool box, but we did find that funny video of a demented squirrel on youtube" he chuckled his piggish laugh at the memory of that video.

"Hey Dr. Neuman, suppose we want to catch these guys red handed" Lou asked "Where do you expect them to strike next?" Neuman turned back to the board and looked at the pictures of the three versions of their target.

"The female will probably go after another target where the environment is being threatened" Neuman concluded.

"Hmm." Eddie moaned "Well, that could be anywhere in town"

"The boy appears to have something against education and teachers" that was true, the boy _Green Face_ had humiliated Principle Skinner and nearly destroyed Springfield Elementary. "So I'd suggest lookouts at all places of learning like libraries. And the man appears to like drinking" Neuman raised his hand to his chin as he thought, but Wiggum came up with his own idea.

"So we put a guard on all the Duff trucks and bars in town?" Wiggum concluded

"Exactly" Neuman agreed not showing any hint of being impressed. At last this guy was finally starting to say something useful, Wiggum thought as he turned to his colleges.

"Okay boys, place undercover officers at all places of learning, any place where the environment is under threat and anywhere that severs alcoholic beverages."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, Chief" Lou said hold up his hands to stop Wiggum "We don't have the manpower to cover all those areas."

Wiggum sighed at his colleges stupidity. "Then we take officers off less important cases to make up that man power." He said to Lou as if this was obvious "Like what's Henderson, Hodges and Hawk doing?"

"On the lookout for a several cereal killers, including Sideshow Bob" Eddie said holding up several different case files he'd picked up from the desk behind him where those three officers usually sat.

"Right take them off those cases and put them on this one, I want maximum attention to this case, no green faced freak humiliates me in my town and gets away with it."

"What should I do about the cereal murder cases?" Eddie asked

"Give it to the dog or something; do I have to think of everything?" Wiggum said as he stormed out of the briefing room for a coffee.

Eddie looked down at the case files in his hands, shrugged and just dumped them in front of one of the sniffer hounds which lay near his desk, the dog sniffed at the files then started to chew and eat them.

* * *

**6:45pm**

The phone rang waking Homer up from his sleep, he was on the sofa in the TV area digesting dinner. A dinner that for some reason hadn't featured either Bart or Lisa, and Marge was getting annoyed that the two kids wouldn't come down. Homer wasn't happy seeing food go to waste either so to make her happy he ate not only his dinner but Bart's and Lisa's, despite Lisa's being a vegetarian meal. Now stuffed he'd decided to take a nap so he laid down on the sofa in the TV area and drifted off to sleep. Now with the phone ringing he was jolted back into consciousness.

"Ugh, Umm, I'm up! I'm UP!" he whaled flailing his arms forcing him to roll off the sofa on to the hard floor with a thud "D'oh!" he screamed as he got back up and picked up the phone next to the sofa. This had better be about pork chops, he was dreaming about pork chops _Mmmm, Pork chops._

"Homer?" asked the person on the other side, his voice sounded excited.

"Hey Lenny" Homer answered "I won't be coming to Moe's tonight, me and Marge are off for a night on the town"

"It's not about Moe's Homer, you know Lard Lads donuts" it was more a statement then a question "They've just been shut down by the health committee, again! This time for food poisoning and they're giving out their entire stock of donuts for free, again!"

At the sound of the words donuts Homer started to drool, when he heard the words Free and Donuts in the same sentence his eyes widened, his body shook in excitement and he was drooling so much he could've drowned in his own saliva, in fact he was already chocking on it before he came to his senses.

"Free Donuts!" he managed to say out loud when he felt he could control himself "OMIGOD, OMIGOD, OMIGOD! I'M THERE!" he started to put the phone down, but hesitated and lifted it back up to his ear "Oooh" he moaned "But I promised Marge we would go out to that Copo-whatisit? place tonight"

"You better make up your mind Homer, because in a few hours their entire stock will be gone." What a dilemma, never before had a man faced such a difficult dilemma, either go out, please his wife and get drunk, or save thousands of innocent donuts from being eaten by the unworthy. Homer hopped from one leg to the other glancing down at the phone and towards the kitchen, which was the place he most associated with Marge.

Maybe, if he hurried he could gorge himself on donuts and be back in time to take Marge out, if he hurried. "Hold everyone at bay Lenny, the King of the Donuts is about to arrive!" With that he slammed the phone down, quickly scribbled a note to Marge, picked up his car keys, raced out the front door, climbing into his car, reversed off the drive and sped off into the distance.

* * *

**7:30pm**

Marge applied some more eyeliner to her face and looked at herself in the mirror, perfect, she thought. It wasn't very often you got to put on nice things two nights in a row. She was wearing a black dress which brought out the shape of her figure quiet well and high heeled black shoes which added a couple of inches to her height. She smiled at how lovely she looked as she applied red lipstick to her lips.

She glanced at the clock, they were supposed to go out at eight and it was seven thirty, where was Homer? That was her major concern. She'd gotten his message that he was going out really quick and would be back by seven thirty but still he was not home.

With her makeup applied and looking like the most gorgeous thing in Springfield -at least to her she felt that way- she descended the stairs. She got to the bottom when she realised the babysitters, her sisters Patty and Selma hadn't turned up. They'd agreed to babysit the kids tonight but there was no sign of them, she was sure they were only delayed in traffic, but this was cutting it a little fine. She hurried over to the phone and quickly dialled the number for their apartment across town, if they didn't pick up then it meant they were on their way.

They were both still a little freaked after that troublemaker _Green Face_ attacked them three weeks ago, Marge could only imagine what that guy had done to them but they had seemed un-phased by it these days.

"Yeah" came the rough voice of Patty

"Patty, I thought you and Selma agreed to come babysit the kids tonight?" Marge said a little peevishly.

Patty grunted "Marge, haven't you been watching the news?"

"I know _Green Face_ is back but you promised..." but Patty interrupted her

"No, no, no, I mean what that idiot Homer's done to himself" Patty added and a worried look started to cross over Marge's face.

"What's happened to him?" she asked anxiously

"Turn on the TV, channel six" Patty instructed. Marge reached for the TV remote and flipped the set on.

"...the worst case of mass poisoning!" came Kent Brockmans voice as the picture slowly faded onto the screen, it showed him standing outside Lard Lads donut shop, a hut like building with a fifty foot tall statue of a fat looking boy holding up a large round donut in his left hand high above his head. "Lard Lads donuts recently closed up shop today when health officials deemed their products 'as poisonous as arsenic' with their company about to go bust they announced their closing down sale with the slogan 'Free Donuts, and no we're not joking!' which attracted many 'lard lads' but the poisonous donuts fast infected their consumers, two of who are currently locked in the men's room of the shop with upset stomachs, and several have had to be taken to hospital after consuming way too much of the dangerous dough."

The picture turned to show Homer strapped down to a stretcher still munching on donuts and fighting paramedics who were trying to take them away from him. As he was pushed into the back of an ambulance he suddenly shouted "Huh? Where are you taking me? I can't go to hospital I promised Marge I'd take her out tonight!" the paramedics closed the doors on him, entered the vehicle and drove off sirens blazing. Marge turned the TV off, she couldn't watch anymore.

"What a fat idiot" she heard Patty say through the phone she still had to her ear "I'm glad I'm not married to him" said a quieter rough voice over the phone that could only be Selma who was probably sitting close to Patty which is why Marge could hear her.

"So we don't need to come babysit, with Homer in hospital it looks like you're not going out" Marge slammed the phone down on her sisters. They didn't phone her up to inform her of Homers condition, instead they waiting for her to find out like this, sometimes her sisters could be so insensitive.

She hoped Homer was alright and quickly telephoned the hospital to inquire about her husband. They informed her he was okay and was just sleeping off the stomach pump, he would be able to return home by morning. Thanking them for taking care of her husband she put the phone down and slowly walked back upstairs, a blue look on her face.

She'd spent so much time getting ready, she put all this effort into make herself look as nice as she could and like last night it had all been for nothing.

She went back into her bedroom and looked at herself in her dress mirror, her frowning face made her once gorgeous looking reflection just look, wrong, was the only word she could think to describe it. She didn't blame Homer for this, last night he'd been fooled by the fake invitation as she had, and tonight he was poisoned by donuts, she didn't know who to blame and she didn't really care. All she'd wanted was a night away from the house, she slaves here all day all night with little gratitude from the kids or Homer, she was always stressed but hardly ever showed it. She just wanted a night out every once and a while she just wanted to cut loose and enjoy herself, but it never seems to happen.

She took a step back and was going to sit on the edge of her double bed, suddenly she felt her left heel landed on something which slipped under her weight, forcing her to lose her balance and fall onto the bed kicking her left foot out.

Sitting back up again she looked down at what had caused it, it was just under the edge of her bed almost out of sight, something green. She reached down and felt its wooded texture and she realised immediately what it was, it was that mask of Bart's, the one she lost this morning.

She sighed as she looked at the mischievous expression on its face, it looked like it was enjoying itself while the world around her was so stressful and miserable.

"I never get a night to enjoy myself" she said out loud to it "Instead I've got kids who misbehave and play with knives, I've got a husband who's often insensitive and makes everything so difficult and I've got a couple of sisters who offer no support at all..." she turned the thing over so she was looking inside it. Looking at herself in the dress mirror in front of her she raised the wooden thing to her face, she might as well complete her disappointment for the night by ruining her makeup "...Marge Simpson..." she said "...this is your LIIIYYYYYYYFFFFFFEE!"

Pain shot across her face as the Mask made contact with it. She tried to scream but couldn't because it was as if her voice box and throat had gone into spasm. Her hands still held the Mask to her face and the ancient thing felt like it was melting and moulding itself to her features, the cold wood was becoming a warm rubbery texture. She shut her eyes, the pain was unbearable as what felt like forks of lightning shot over her brain before trickling down the back of her neck and into the rest of her body from the roots of her hair to the tips of her fingers and toes.

Suddenly she flung her arms out and arched her back, all her limbs became still and stiff as what felt like a whirl wind swirled around her and the entire room lit up with a bright light that emanated from her body that continued glow brighter and brighter as Marge Simpson felt the unpleasant sensation she was being electrocuted.

The pain subsided but this odd sensation continued, as she looked up at the ceiling she felt her body begin to lift up from the ground by itself until she was standing on her tip toes. Then she felt as if she had been hit by a great heat wave, the whirl wind stopped and Marge dropped the short distance back to her feet, still standing upright. This was odd, she didn't feel depressed anymore, she didn't feel tired anymore.

"Hey there gorgeous!" she said as she looked at herself in the mirror, several things had changed in the last ten seconds, first was her voice, it wasn't whiny or moan-y as it was a moment ago, it sounded confident and almost seductive. Her clothes had changed, her black dress had become a bright red one with a very low neckline and it hugged her now thinner, curvier body. Her hair was still blue but rather then extending up into the air like it had done it fell down her back and looked so silky and shiny it had the appearance of a waterfall running down her back, splashing onto her narrow shoulders before continuing and stopping halfway down her back. But the most noticeable difference was her face, it was lime green in colour which seemed to bring out her slightly larger, hazel eyes quite well and her nose was a little smaller but in a cute kind of way.

"Oh well, Lisa said this family was slowly becoming green" she grinned as she saw her perfect and a bright, gleaming white.

Her mind tried to question this, but something just pushed those questions aside because they were not important, all that mattered right now to her was her life and what she wanted. As she continued to inspect her new appearance she realised something was missing from it, there was just one little change needed to complete it. Though it was a ludicrous idea somehow she knew it would work, she looked at her profile in the mirror and breathed in deeply through her mouth filling her lungs with air, when she was finished she held it in and though she wasn't exhaling the air was escaping her lungs. Her face didn't show any indication that she thought what was happening was in the least bit odd as her chest slowly started to balloon out until her bosom was large enough to have a noticeable cleavage showing over the neckline of her dress.

She raised her hands behind her back and ran her fingers up into her hair in a very seductive manner as she checked how sexy she looked in the mirror. "Now that's more like it" this new version of her said. She wanted to look her best, she was going out tonight Homer or no Homer, Babysitter or no Babysitter but her motherly instincts were still present, she wanted her kids to be as safe as possible while she was away and with a speed she never expected she was capable of she locked all the kids rooms doors despite them not having locks fitted. If they were locked in their rooms then no one could hurt them and they couldn't hurt each other, usually she wouldn't have thought this but she didn't feel in her right mind anyway so she just discarded any thoughts like that.

She then raced down the stairs and out the front door, she circled the house somehow producing a long chain that she circled around the house once or twice before fixing one end to the other with a pad lock. There was no way anyone was going to break in to hurt the kids now, and if anyone did then she'd murder them! And with the kids locked away in their rooms they couldn't get into any trouble, break anything or bother each other.

Slowly she walked towards the curb and though Marge usually would never do this, she held out one leg and pulled her skirt up a little exposing one of her slender legs. In a second a yellow taxi cab came to a squealing halt in front of her. The driver looked bemused, probably because he had no idea how he just got there.

"Taxi, the Copacabana!" she ordered, and the taxi cab suddenly raced off in the blink of an eye leaving her standing by the curb "Hey, wait for me!" she shouted at it and it quickly reversed back allowing her to enter the back seat.

"How the heck did I get here?" the Taxi driver said in a thick New York accent.

"Step on it" she commanded, at first the taxi driver did nothing as he spied at the masked woman in his rear view mirror. "Come on! Move it! Onward! Alons-y!" she commanded and the Taxi gained a life of its own, it shot forward with no aid from the driver and disappeared into the night.

* * *

**To be continued...**

* * *

**Authors notes:** I think I've tortured you all enough, those who wanted Marge/Mask, well now you've got her ;) :D Hope you like her.

To make things interesting I've decided to make Marge's Mask transformation a little different from the others in that there is no twirling tornado, instead the two Marge's would've just morphed from one to the other.


	19. The Copacabana

**Chapter 18**

**The Copacabana**

The yellow Taxi cab raced down the streets of Springfield its panicking taxi driver unsuccessfully wrestling with the steering wheel in a fighting to regain control of the vehicle which was being control by some unknown force while the woman in the back appeared to remain as cool as a cucumber. The car turned sharply and the drive lost his grip on the steering wheel sending his arms flying.

In the back seat of the taxi Marge Simpson, or whoever or whatever she was now, glanced at a silver handheld mirror she seemed to have conjured up into her left hand all of a sudden. There were many oddities she felt her brain detect, like how come the cab was driving itself, what happened to that wooden mask she placed on her face, how come she now had a lime green head with massive baseball card sized teeth of a white so white they were blinding, why was her hair like this? But as these thoughts surfaced for brief moments they immediately sank back down again and she paid the no mind.

She ran a hand through her shiny, long blue hair which fell down her back. For some reason she preferred it like this now rather than the tall lamppost she used to be, but it probably had something to do with that British singer Amy Winehouse who had a very similar hair style to her old one. Every time she met someone new they all had the ridicules thought that she was a big fan of Winghouse and that irritated her, so the 'new her' had decided to abandon the tall hair style that firemen could use to reach burning buildings in favour of something more... classical.

She tilted the mirror to take in her curvy form it was irresistible in her mind, she was irresistible but there was something missing to her look, something she couldn't quite put her finger on. Then she noticed her neck and ears, they should have earrings of some sort and a necklace. She shifted her gaze to her fingers they also needed jewellery of some sort, without this jewellery she felt flawed, incomplete, un-pretty and imperfect.

"Stop this cab!" she shouted at the cab driver who stilled tried to fight his steering wheel and the car came to a screeching halt and rather conveniently right outside a jewellery shop. "Hey, how convenient!" she said as she opened the back of the taxi cab and stepped out and closed the door before turning back to the cab driver. He looked confused as he fought with both the wheel and the gear stick to get it moving again, but unfortunately for him it wouldn't go unless Marge said so. "Keep the engine running" she said and winking at him.

She turned on the spot and walked towards the front of the jewellery shop, a sign hanging on the inside by a piece of string read 'Sorry, we're Closed'. So nice of them to apologise but this was an emergency in her book. She didn't want to bother the people in charge, wake them up or anything like that so she'll just walk in and help herself, after all in her new state of mind there didn't seem to be anything wrong with that.

She placed her hand on the door handle and smiled as the 'Sorry, we're Closed' sign suddenly flopped off the door and twirled over onto its other side so it read 'Welcome, we are Open' and the door's lock jangled as it opened as if by magic. Of course when she opened the door it immediately set off an alarm bell on the far side of the shop. It was the old fashioned sort, a round red bell and a small hammer continually slamming down on top of it.

On her arm she suddenly found a very small purse that she was aware she didn't have before she came in and had just appeared on her arm, it was only large enough to contain loose change but she showed no surprise whatsoever when she opened it up, reached in and produced a large, wooden mallet. She slammed it down on the alarm bell, the ringing stopped and the thing fell off the wall in a shower of sparks and broken parts.

With the alarm immobilised she turned to look at all the precious jewellers, all the sparkling crystals and glistening diamonds and shiny gold, it was a jewellery store but to her mind it was like Aladdin's cave and her eyes grew to cartoonish proportions a she spied it all. She'll only borrow what she needs she reasoned, no need to get greedy. She waited a few seconds before, as quick as a flash she was racing around the entire shop examining what each item looked like on her, the rings, the necklaces, the bracelets, the ear rings, all of it. She appeared in front of a full length dress mirror every few milliseconds observing each piece of jewellery on her individually before trying different combinations trying to get it just right.

Energetically she went up to a cabinet and opened it up without the key –requiring great strength and resulted in the lock being ripped off- and spied all the lovely gold and ruby incrusted rings in it. Her eyes widened and budged cartoonishly again as she raised her hands, extended her fingers to point down at them and began lowering and raising her fingers so fast they were a blur of motion. When she stopped all the rings were gone from the cabinet and were on her fingers and was packed so full of rings of all shapes and sizes that she could barely move her fingers.

She moved over to another cabinet and... she felt a sling ping from the top of her head. Turning around she saw a few strands of her long blue hair caught in the clasp of the broken cabinet lock. As she watched its shiny, silky blueness slowly faded and it became a little duller. Like everything else that was happening she didn't question it at all as she turned back and began to try on more necklaces in a nearby mirror.

She was like a kid in a candy story, but she had places to be and in the next five minutes, after finding the type of jewellery that went with her dress she decided to put the rest into her 'small' purse for safe keeping, she only intended to borrow these items for the night and she had every intention of returning them... so it was therefore not stealing.

She exited the jewellery store and closed the door again, the moment she let go of the handle the locks moved back into position and the sign swung back to 'Sorry, we're Closed'. She then turned and slowly walked back to her waiting cab, but then she moaned that Marge moan because she now thought the dirty looking, boxy, yellow cab just wasn't enough she decided, it needed more to it, it needed to be flashier more to her needs to make an entrance.

Though what was happening before her eyes was questionable she didn't show it, and the driver who was sitting inside the car looked around in bemusement as his yellow taxi cab was beginning to transform and change shape. It was becoming shorter, and longer with each passing moment, its yellow paint faded to pure white and its windows became tinted black. Slowly the taxi became a stretch limo, perfect! Marge approached it opened the back door and stepped inside closing it behind her.

"Parker!" she said in a very posh sounding English accent.

"Yes mi' lady" came an old husky voice of the driver, who'd also transformed with the car so he was dressed in a limo drivers outfit and spoke like an English butler instead of his rough and rather annoying Brooklyn accent.

"To the Copacabana!" she ordered her voice back in its usual tones.

"Yes, mi' lady" said 'Parker' as the limo left the scene of the jewellery shop.

* * *

Springfield could be a dangerous place at night. Hidden under the cloak of darkness any dangerous criminal could do what they liked in the false confidence that the shadow of the planet would hide their deeds. But the dim light didn't mean there weren't eyes watching and the eyes of the Springfield's finest were on the Copacobanna. Springfield's finest being Chief Wiggum, and officers Lou and Ed, all wearing plain clothes and standing in line to enter the nightclub, eyes peeled for the elusive _Green Face_. These three are usually the only three to stand between the innocent and the guilty, heaven help the innocent.

"What makes you think they'll let us in here Chief?" Lou asked

"Lou, Shh!" Wiggum shushed him "Tonight call me Clancy, not Chief, we're supposed to be undercover"

"Yeah, undercover" Lou said with heavy sarcasm

The three police officers were dressed as casually as they thought would be needed for a nightclub like this. Lou and Ed in smartly dressed grey suits, unfortunately though Chief Wiggum never kept up with current fashions nor did he seem to understand that to go under cover you had to be inconspicuous because he was wearing his old seventies pale blue disco suit with a shirt half open at the neck. This coupled with the cast and sling over his broken left arm made him look like a very unusual sight in a night club.

"Real inconspicuous, Clancy" Lou said now dripping with sarcasm but Wiggum didn't appear to be paying attention, instead abruptly answering Lou's question.

"They'll let us in when we show them our badges" Wiggum said confidently as someone at the front of the line was emitted inside and the people in the line shuffled down a little further down. "Just be on the lookout for anyone with a green head"

"Whoa, whoa Chief" Lou said halting Wiggum's words. "Clancy" the chief of police insisted before Lou went on "You didn't say anything about bringing our badges with us"

The person in front of them was next to be allowed access and Wiggum came over to the tall, long haired, large bouncer. "Oh for crying out loud, at least someone here is resourceful." Wiggum said as he reached into his inside pocket for his badge but his hands curled around nothing, nothing but his side arm hidden under his jacket. He couldn't find his badge anywhere.

"You on the list?" the bouncer asked looking down at his clipboard

"Umm" Wiggum said uncertainly "I am Police Chief Clancy Wiggum" he announced hoping his status would be recognised "Me and the boys are undercover in this establishment"

"Show me your badge" the bouncer countered narrowing his eyes and lowering the clipboard ready for any trouble.

A loud blaring horn caused Wiggum to jump back as a white blur formed in front of them and came to a rapid stop. Now standing by the sidewalk was a long, bright white limousine. The driver of this vehicle exited the driver's side and hurried around to the other side to open the back door. The driver's face looked rough and unshaven, which was a contrast to his perfectly cut, clean suit.

As he opened the back door a woman stepped out, slender legged, curvy body, ample cleavage, long, flowing blue hair, a green face... Wait a minute? A Green Face? She smiled, showing two rows of freakishly large teeth typical of _Green Face_ and like _Green Face_ she lacked any type of ears on the sides of her head.

"Hey Chie... err Clancy" Lou said as he gazed at this figure in astonishment "Do you see what I see?"

She slowly walked towards the entrance to the Copacabana, looked down the line of people waiting to enter the night club some of which were none too happy that she was trying to get in a head of everyone else. She smiled with those large teeth and seductively winked at them all. The effect was astounding, all the eyes of all the men in the line went wide with seductive lust for this sassy girl.

"That must be _Green Face_" Wiggum said as he felt his brain fall under the spell of this fully grown, female version.

"My...how she's grown" Lou said slowly also falling under this green faced womans' spell.

"I...I...I'm sorry" the Bouncer stuttered "Are you on the list?" he asked as the woman walked over to him, making sure to knock her hips in just the right way.

"Am I?" she asked in a voice that oozed seductiveness and she winked at him, the Bouncer seemed to fall into whatever spell she was casting on everyone.

"You are now" he said quickly stepping out of the way allowing her to enter the club.

Maybe it was the cold air or something but suddenly Wiggum snapped out of that trance he was currently in. He shook his head to clear it, it was as if he had been hypnotised. He looked at his two partners who stilled had a glazed expression of lust over their faces. Wiggum snapped his fingers in front of their faces.

"Hey, snap out of it!" he insisted and the two Police Officers blinked and shook their heads a little as if they had just woken up form a dream. "That was _Green Face_! Now's our chance to grab her once and for all."

But as he approached the Bouncer in the monkey suit he still refused to allow him access to the club.

* * *

The nightclub was quite dark and crowded and was much, much more lively then the regulars at Moe's, and if she had to be honest Moe the mole man actually gave her the creeps a little.

While she walked through the club she was aware that she was attracting a bit of attention from the people around her, most of whom looked taken aback then shocked at the sight of her obviously stunned by her because she was after all 'the' most gorgeous creature in the club.

Clubs like this were really alien territory to her, it was a far stretch to the usual dancing clubs of her time, the music was playing far too loud for conversation and it wasn't of any artists she recognised. The people inside were also a little rude and were packed together like battery chickens, but she tried to blend in as much as possible and slowly danced her way towards the bar.

It was odd, but for some reason she couldn't seem to be able to think clearly at all in her current mind state. Thoughts that usually bubbled up to the surface like concerns and other nagging thoughts which influenced her actions didn't appear to phase her or anything. Like she was dancing, but dancing in a way that was not typical of her, she had a lot more movement going on in her hips for a start and her dancing felt much more fluid then her sometimes jerky motions she'd sometimes go through. She was used to slow dancing like when Homer first took her out. She wondered briefly if Homer was alright in a hospital bed getting his stomach pumped but all thoughts of her husband were banished from her mind the instant they were raised. She had trouble thinking about her actions and as a result she could only act on her instincts.

The people seemed to magically clear a space for her when she reached the bar and as she caught her green reflection in the mirror hanging behind the bar she smiled showing the rows of large teeth, everything about her to her mind was perfect. Her hair was perfect, her dress was nice, she was just perfect, period.

"Give me a shot of tequila!" she demanded of the barman, a tall handsome man with long, shoulder length hair, chisel jaw and large muscles. He was gorgeous, so gorgeous her mouth fell open at the sight of him and fell so far it impacted the counter. When he turned to regard her she quickly grabbed her slack jaw and pushed it back up into her skull then ran her fingers through her hair as the barman came to serve her.

"What can I get for you madam?" he asked in a voice that was making Marge's insides melt.

"Yeah" she said trying to leaning on the bar counter to draw the man's maximum attention to her body. "What say you and me play the dating game" Weird, that was unbelievably forward of her and yet it also felt right in her mind.

"Excuse me?" the hunk of a man asked raising an eyebrow.

"You're excused!" she said as she leapt over the counter into the man's arms. "Take me away with you, but be gentle, I'm fragile!" she gave him a passionate kiss on the lips which the man felt like he was fighting against. He then unceremoniously dumped her over the counter and out of sight.

She felt hurt but her heart was still pounding in her chest, her heart felt so inflated it actually made her float upwards back to her feet, she thinks she's in love. In the next instant she was over the counter and by his side again pressing her body into his. "I like people who play hard to get" she said as the man looked back at her clearly unimpressed.

"I'm not playing hard to get madam" he said pushing her away from him "I'm actually gay"

At those words Marge's heart fell like a stone, he was gay, why are all the good looking one's gay?

"Then why were you trying to chat me up you...!" she fumed at him but he just ignored her and moved away to take the order of someone else, and she felt a little insulted by the lack of attention. "No, no wait, wait!" she pleaded somehow managing to step in front of him despite the bar being very narrow. "Okay, look we got off on the wrong foot, I'll make a deal with you..." she said as she wrapped her arms around him again "come back to my place..." she said in a very seductive tone "and I'll cure you."

A hand came sharply across her face as the man slapped her and her mouth weirdly twisted around and around her head, something everyone around the bar seem to take an immediate dislike to as some of them recoiled in disgust. She turned to regard the barman again. "What did I say?" she asked holding out her arms in an innocent manner as her face contracted back to its original gorgeous shape.

She must've rattled someone's cage quite badly because a couple of large men suddenly came around the bar and grabbed her by the arms before she could react and she was gradually dragged away.

"Where's the party boys!" she said as they dragged her out of the bar area. She knew they were going to throw her out but she wasn't ready to leave just yet.

_What's with this music?_ She thought as music blared around her. How could the younger generation like this stuff? She just wasn't feeling anything for it, it was also very bland and boring she detested this music, where's all the stuff from her childhood, all the stuff she grew up with? Some might consider her 'old' for liking the Beetles and the Rolling Stones over whatever stuff there was these days, but to her mind she just had taste, where as 'they' did not. Before she left she intended to give these people a lesson in proper music.

With the two bouncers dragging her by the arms she slyly slipped from their grasp leaving them clutching the arms of a pathetic looking dummy like replica of her. They didn't notice the switch because they continued to drag it away towards the entrance.

Quick as a flash she found the box that held the DJ and all his CD's and songs and stepped inside. The DJ was about to put another of his god-awful songs in the machine when she grabbed his swivel chair by the back and spun it around so fast the guy was just a whirl of motion. Marge picked up the headset and a microphone.

"Okay, all you out there, you wanna hear proper music!" a crash sounded in the box as the DJ and his swivel chair crashed into something but she didn't concern herself with that as she pulled out a black vinyl record from nowhere like a magician and popped it in the CD play and the room fell silent. But the CD player refused to close because its disk drive was much smaller than the radius of the vinyl record. Then the words 'non-compatible format' came across its screen.

"Non-compatible? I'll just give this thing an upgrade" she said as she pulled a very large and heavy hammer from her cleavage, cocked it back and whacked the record inside the player.

The words 'Non-compatible format' vanished, the record started spinning and music began to fill the air. Marge then stepped out of the DJ box with the microphone still in her hands because she intended to sing this song herself.

The people in the crowd watched her with confused looks on their faces, others just watched drunkenly swaying on their feet and a couple even wolf whistled at her as she brought the microphone up to her face and prepared to sing.

"You took a mystery and made me want it

Got a pedestal and put me on it

You made me love you out of feeling nothing

Something that you do"

This was one of her favourite songs, Chain Reaction by Diana Ross, it was a really romantic song and one she remembered hearing while on a date with Homer and everything that night just seemed to spark about him, that was before he got drunk and spent the rest of the night in the bather room with his head down the toilet of course. The version of the song Marge was singing was different to the original, the music had a faster pace because experience told her the generation of today liked music with a fast beat and so she was trying to mimic this. The people however did not appear to appreciate her effort to educate them on music because the bouncers -who didn't seem to like her taking control of the DJ's box- began to advance on her while she continued to sing.

"And I was there and not dancing with anyone

You took a little, then you took me over

You set your mark on stealing my heart away

Crying, trying, anything for you"

* * *

Something was going on inside the night club Wiggum realised; the fast hard beating music had stopped momentarily. He wanted to go inside and take a look but the bouncer on the door refused to admit him because he wouldn't show him his police badge. He made such a pain out of himself the bouncer actually threw him into the damp gutter and was now trying to conceal a very large damp patch on his white trousers.

"I can sort of see why white pants went out of fashion" Lou said to Wiggum's annoyance. Wiggum remembered leaving his ID and badge in his other pants, which were at home and that was way across town, but they needed to be in there now to stop _Green Face_ before she did something too drastic.

Someone came out of the clubs front doors and attracted the bouncers attention, by the look and attire of this other man he was obviously another member of staff and Wiggum caught the first few words of his whispered sentences.

"We've got trouble" he said. The bouncer looked back briefly at the troublesome cop before entering the club with his college.

Springfield's badge-less Police Chief got up and made to follow but stopped short when the doors suddenly flew open and the two bouncers 'bounced' along the floor and rolled across the road head over butt before impacting the wall on the other side of the street, knocking themselves out in the process.

"Okay boys!" Wiggum said to his two colleges "Call for back up, this time _Green Face_ is going down!" He didn't need a badge now, trouble was a foot and duty calls. He reached into his suit and pulled out his revolver and Eddie and Lou did the same as they all entered the night club. Lights danced around in front of their faces and loud fast paced music filled the air.

"This is the SPD, no need to panic" he called to everyone around him "This is just a routine apprehension of a shape shifting lunatic, nothing to be worried about" but he could barely hear himself shout these words over the voice of one woman who's singing voice rang off every wall in the club.

"And I was there and not dancing with anyone"

It sang. Wiggum looked over at a far corner near a DJ booth, and standing just outside it, microphone in her hands was...

"You took a little, then you took me over"

It was _Green Face_, the lady _Green Face_

"You set your mark on stealing my heart away

Crying, trying, anything for you"

She walked onto a stage –which was odd considering there was no stage in this club- holding the microphone to her mouth while she sang. Behind her was a large round wheel with four rockets strapped to the sides which suddenly erupted flames and sparked and the wheel slowly started to rotate.

"I'm in the middle of a chain reaction

You give me all the after midnight action

I wanna get you where I can let you make all that love to me"

Wiggum turned to his colleges. "Why isn't she destroying stuff like last time?" he asked of them. Every other time they'd met _Green Face,_ in fact every time 'it' had reared its green head she'd caused havoc and destruction. This time all she seemed to be doing is singing and dancing to a crowd of people all of whom seem mesmerised by her singing and dancing. Her voice was very expressive and soft but Wiggum fought against it, mind tricks only worked on the weak minded.

"Let's get her!" he said and moved towards her but quickly became aware his colleges weren't following him, instead they stood arms limp, guns at their sides pointing down their eyes captivated by _Green Face's_ singing.

"I'm on a journey for inspiration

To anywhere and there ain't no salvation

I need you to get me near to you

So you can set me free"

Wiggum turned back and snapped his fingers in front of their faces and that seemed to break their trances. Lou and Eddie blinked a few times as they came to their senses.

"Huh? What?" Lou said

"Wake up, you can nap later" Wiggum's ears were beginning to ring with the loud music, to clear them he stuck the mussel of his revolver into his left ear hole and swivelled the barrel to clear the ringing. "You're making us look like a bunch of idiots" he said as he did this.

"You make me tremble when your hand moves lower

You taste a little then you swallow slower

Nature has a way of yielding treasure

Pleasure made for you, oh"

Wiggum pulled the barrel from his ear and motioned for his colleges to follow him but as they turned to intercept _Green Face_ the other civilians in the nightclub suddenly weren't standing still anymore. They all jumped up at different times causing a wave effect which went from one side of the club to the other then broke into a synchronised dance.

"You gotta plan, your future is on the run

Shine a light for the whole world over

You never find your love if you hide away

Crying, dying, all you gotta do is"

Wiggum, Lou and Eddy tried to push their way through the dancing crowd towards _Green Face_ when hands suddenly reached out and grabbed them by their wrists. They all dropped their guns as each of them was pulled towards someone who began dancing with them.

"Get in the middle of a chain reaction

You get a medal when you're lost in action

I wanna get your love all ready for the sweet sensation

Instant radiation"

Eddy was dancing with an attractive looking blond girl, Lou was with an attractive and busty brunet, Wiggum however found himself dancing in the arms of _Green Face_ herself. She held onto him in a dancing position and his feet somehow found their mark, which was unusual because his wife always said he had two left feet.

"You let me hold you for the first explosion

We get a picture of our love in motion

My arms will cover, my lips will smother you

With no more left to say"

Suddenly she took his broken, casted arm and held it tight as she flung him away from her, the cast snapped and broke apart into pieces and Wiggum felt a dagger of pain shoot through his broken arm. He cried out in pain but then the dagger of pain formed into a sort of ache of relief when _Green Face_ pulled him back towards her. Her arms now draped over his neck and his own arms at her waist.

"You let me hold you for the first explosion

Arms will cover you"

He wiggled his fingers and flexed his arm a little. It was fine, his bones were set and his arm healed, but how?

* * *

A little distance away a brightly white van shot through the midnight traffic avoiding other cars and racing through traffic lights. On the side of the van was the logo for channel six news, nothing could stop the media these days.

Inside in the driver's seat sat the passive inexpressive form of Mr. Channel Six himself Kent Brockman. He remained calm as he checked his appearance in the sun visor mirror. This was it, no other news anchor had managed to film the elusive _Green Face_ on the rampage nor get a direct interview with him, her... 'it', but today that would change because they'd got a tip off that _Green Face_ was at the Copacobana club in a new female guise.

He was one freaky guy, first appearing as a man, then an adolescent boy, then a girl now a woman, how could he make his disguises so convincing? That was one of the questions he wanted to ask, others included, where he came from, why he was here? Was he green –in the sense of environmental protection- etc, etc. That was assuming he could get an exclusive interview but Kent could be persistent when the need arose.

The van screeched to a halt right outside the club on the opposite side of the road, loud music could be heard permeating the clubs walls into the surrounding street. Kent Brockman jumped out followed by the camera man from the rear doors.

"Quick, how's my appearance?" he asked as he stood in front of the club a few hundred yards away a microphone in his hands. The camera man gave him a thumbs' up and continued setting up the camera. _Come on hurry up you useless junky!_ Kent thought impatiently to himself.

"Okay were rolling" the cameraman said and Kent quickly composed himself, put on his best neutral face, the news had to be unbiased after all.

"_Green Face_, man, monster, menace? Just a few of the words used to describe this elusive troublemaker as he goes on the rampage in many convincing guises. But tonight we will see his mischievous behaviour first hand. This reporter has received a tip off that _Green Face_ is as we speak, inside the new Copocobana club and no doubt causing havoc." _And he'd better be_ Kent thought to himself _or that caller is so dead_. Kent then started walking slowly towards the clubs entrance the camera following him all the way.

"What manage of destructive misery is this mean and green troublemaker is inflicting on the occupants of this small building we can only gue..."

Before he could finished the word 'Guess' Kent felt the doors which were just behind him swing open and smashed him into the wall besides it. The music inside flooded out along with many cheery looking people all of whom appeared to be whooping and dancing around like a live performance. The camera man was taking steps to capture this, most of them backwards as the people came closer towards him and every second of this bizarre sight was being caught on camera. From the music came a soft female voice, singing loudly.

"And I was there and not dancing with anyone

You took a little, then you took me over"

Whatever was going on Kent had no idea. It was like that amateur video of what happened last night at Burns' mansion, when the girl _Green Face_ sang 'Somebody to love' by Queen, only this time it wasn't animals that danced with her...him...it, it was the people and by the look on their faces they were enjoying themselves and... wait wasn't that Police Chief Wiggum in a ridicules looking disco suit with his partners? And wasn't his arm broken and in a cast this morning?

"You set tour mark on stealing my heart away

"'Crying, dying, all you gotta do is'"

The people sang the last line with the mysterious singer and had arranged themselves into several equally spaced rows. Then they had started making specific dance movements that each line did, followed a micro second later by the next line along from them doing the exact same movements followed by the next row doing the same movements a second later. This continued down the length of this arrangement and gave the affect o fa wave going from one side of this parade to the other. Then, as Kent gently pushed the door away from him it swung open again violently and smashed him in the face as a blue haired, curvy woman in a long sparkling white dress exited the club, swinging her arms out and sang.

"Get in the middle of a chain reaction

You get a medal when you're lost in action

I wanna get your love all ready for the sweet sensation

Instant radiation!"

She slowly walked into the centre of this dancing troop as she sang this, when she reached the dead centre and finished the last line she spun around and sent herself into a whirl like miniature tornado that glowed bright green at its core. Kent had heard descriptions of this 'tornado' sight from witnesses of _Green Face's _previous appearances but he'd never expected or imagined the speed at which this one individual could spin on their heels, it really did look like a tornado.

The next lines were sang by the people around her as she continued to whirl around and around and around.

"Chain reaction, chain reaction,

You get a medal when you're lost in action.

I wanna get your love all ready for the sweet sensation

Instant radiation

Yeeeaaaahhhhh!"

The music came to a climax then stopped as did the whirling form of the woman _Green Face._ She swung her arms out and every man and woman in the dance troop froze in a unique type pose, and after a few moments an eruption of applause roared around the area yet there was no one anywhere as far as Kent could see who could be making that noise. _Green Face_ and her dancers took a low bow to an audience that as far as Kent could tell did not exist.

Mr. Channel Six pushed the door off him again and picked up his microphone which had fallen from his grasp when the door swung open onto him. Where the heck was his camera man he couldn't do a report without someone pointing a camera at him.

Circling around the crowd who were still bowing to the imaginary audience he saw his camera man up against the news van recording the spectacle before him. _Good I could use some extra shots of the crowd to cut to when it goes out_ he thought. The camera man was also getting some unwanted attention from the lead singer herself because she was up close to him and, though he couldn't hear over the thunderous applause, it looked like she was trying to flirt with him.

"I'm ready for my close up now" Kent heard her say to the camera man with a dreamy expression on her face, and a creept-out expression on the camera mans but at least he had the camera pointed at her. Kent checked his appearance in a nearby car's wing mirror, making sure he looked respectable. He noticed one of his cheeks was beginning to sag a little, only a little it wasn't noticeable but he'd have to get that treated with some Botox sometime, otherwise his face would sag like it was made of rubber. Regarding his appearance as acceptable Kent pushed through the crowd and shoved his microphone up to her mouth to get her attention.

"Kent Brockman, channel six news" he announced, the green faced woman looked a little irritated by his presence "Mr. or Mrs. _Green Face_ would you explain why you have this apparent vendetta for..." but the rest of his sentence was cut off when she reached up behind his head and he felt something being gently tugged off the back of his head. When she brought her hand back it looked like a clip you'd use to hold hair in place. This was an odd thing to be attached to the back of his head and he didn't even remember putting it in, but suddenly he felt the folds of his face sag and fold forwards._ What the heck?_

He reached up and felt his face, it was like all the Botox treatments had been reversed in a matter of seconds.

"Go bother someone else Clay Face" she said tossing the clip onto the floor.

* * *

She was having the time of her life! And so were everyone else around her. She'd sang like she'd never sang before and danced like she'd never danced before and got everyone around her to dance with her. True it was due to this odd ability she now had to control people but potato, potARto.

All her life she'd wanted to be a ballerina, to dance and express herself a dream that was crushed when her balance was ruined by her oddly maturing form, or in other words when her bosom's started coming in but one at a time, crazy. Since then she had been used to disappointment and failing to do things but all that had changed in a matter of seconds.

As she turned back to the camera man to start his part in her future dancing career her attention was distracted by a poster on the wall of a video game store down the road. The poster read 'Now In stock, StarRock Games Grand Theft Scratchy IV, Episodes from Scratchy' it read 'Own the expansion pack to one of the most graphically violent games in the world, suitable only for 18 and over. 'But we'll sell it to any parent ignorant of the rating system who'll buy it for their kids realise their mistake, refuse to blame themselves, turn around and focus their outrage on StarRock games and try to ban the game for something they've done because they're lazy parents who want TV and video games to raise their kids for them'. Either way we'll get the money.'

They're releasing a sequel to that horrifically violent game? It was an outrage, Marge's interfering nature tried to get StarRock to ban that game when it first came out but they just kept turning her down and told her it was her own fault for buying it for her son in the first place. But Bart bought the original from that very game store she could see now, one that never followed the regulations of film classification.

She'd have to put a stop to this once and for all! Fire burned in her heart as she swung her arms up and commanded the group of partying people to get up and become a mob, which they did, and some of them had somehow managed to obtain burning torches and pitchforks.

She then directed the mob at the video game store, aware that her pretty face had twisted into a mask of utter rage and her eyes had adopted a blood shot look about them. She had a duty as a mother to see that game whipped from the face of Springfield.

She then commanded of the mob "Destroy it!"

* * *

**To Be Continued...**

* * *

**Authors notes:** The underlying concept I had for Marge's Mask was that Marge is a woman with a great deal of repressed rage and anger and as the mother of the family probably feels the weight of the families problems on her shoulders. She's also a little conscious about showing herself up in public especially if she feels it won't go right. All of these feelings the Mask would remove leaving us with such a wild character who doesn't care what people think of her.

Most of my influences for Marge's Mask are drawn from cartoon characters like Jessica Rabbit and Minerva Mink. In the case of Minerva Mink who always goes gaga over very attractive and bulky guys who don't find her attractive I thought it'd be funny to turn that on its head and the attractive guy to state that he's gay.

The episode where Marge revealed she wanted to be a ballerina was called 'Smoke on the Daughter'

Chain Reaction was originally sung by Diana Ross, no copyright infringement was intended and the lyrics were only used in humour.

Originally Marge was going to sing 'Born this Way' by Lady Gaga, but I changed it at the last minute because Marge is usually very out of touch with popular culture and so probably wouldn't know of it. The song was changed to Chain Reaction thanks to another musical advert by Confused**dot**com car insurance and is a song Marge would more likely know about and like.

The opinions expressed by the characters in this chapter do not reflect my own.

Marge's mob controlling ability at the end comes from the Simpsons Game, where she had exactly the same power.

Hope everyone enjoyed Marge/Mask, she was a tough one to create and write.


	20. Clearing up the Loose Ends

**Chapter 19**

**Clearing up the loose ends**

Something weird had happened last night in Lisa's world, something she couldn't understand. Everything followed a pattern whenever mom and dad went out for the night. First mom would call them all down and introduce them to their babysitter, then ask them not to make trouble for the babysitter, especially Bart, then leave and the house would then get a number of phone calls through the night from mom worrying that they weren't behaving themselves or the babysitter couldn't cope and so on. But weirdly, none of that happened last night.

Mom and dad had just left without saying goodbye or at least she assumed that's what had happened because the next weird thing to happen to Lisa was when she tried to open her own bedroom door at 8 o'clock and found it to be locked, which was weird because her door hand no locking mechanism. At first she'd considered that someone –possibly Bart- had put a chair up against the door handle and wedged it into the floor to lock her inside as revenge for what her alter ego did to him the other night. But that didn't make sense because she could turn the door knob just fine, if a chair was wedged under it the knob would be very stiff, and the door also pushed forward a little but it just refused to open. She'd spent the first few minutes banging on the door to get someone's attention to open it but no dice, there was obviously no one else in the house, or anyone willing to help her. She couldn't get out and as a consequence when she woke up the next morning she was hungry, very thirsty and needed to use the bathroom badly.

Her rumbling stomach had woken her up at 7:00am and not able to take the hunger anymore she tried her bedroom door again, this time it opened no problem, whatever had stopped it before had been lifted.

She had quickly used the bathroom while it was vacant and went down stairs to get a drink of water and a light snack from the fridge. A stick of celery was all she could find but it would do, she was a vegetarian after all.

Making her way back up the stairs back to her bed she heard a loud, throaty hacking noise followed by fast breathing, then the same loud, throaty hacking noise which was followed by what sounded like water pouring into a small body of water.

Curiosity getting the better of her as it always did she followed the noise to its source. It was coming from mom and dad's bedroom. Gently she pushed open the door and spied the bed which had the covers rolled up un-neatly at the foot of the bed, pillows were left askew all over the place and the mattress cover was hanging off on the edge of the bed. Obvious signs that it had been slept in but there was one thing missing from this picture, her parents.

She spied the Homer shaped dent in the mattress where dad usually slept when he wasn't slumped outside Moe's or recovering from a hangover in a police cell, but there was no Homer laying in it, and by the look of the groove it had been vacant all night.

The throaty hacking noise came again. It was coming from the second bathroom attached to her parents room. Slowly she approached the door and there she saw her mom still in her pretty dark blue dress bent over, head down the toilet bowl throwing up obviously after a heavy night out, even from this angle Lisa could tell she looked awful. Her skin was a little pale and she had large bags and dark circles under her eyes. She looked like she had been physically drained.

Lisa's brain registered it but her mind didn't click it until she stepped away from the bathroom door and turned around to face the bed, mom obviously needed to be left alone for a while, it didn't click at first but then it did. Moms dark blue dress was perfect, un-creased or ruffled as if she'd just put it on, something that shouldn't happen when you've been out all night especially when you consider the bed looked like it had been well slept in.

Something else caught Lisa's attention, something on the bed, something that was the wrong colour. On the bed was what appeared to be a small bowl of gold jewellery with glistening rubies and sparkling diamonds. She'd never seen any of this jewellery before and it looked very, very expensive.

With a mixture of curiosity and girly glee at seeing such pretty jewels she reached out for the bowl they were in and slowly started dragging it towards her to get a better look at those pretty looking jewels. But as soon as her fingers had pulled the bowl a few inches towards her she stopped, and her eyes widened in disbelief. It couldn't be could it? Her fingers felt the craggy, wooden texture of this bowl shaped object. It wasn't even a whole bowl, it looked like a bowl but it had one half of it missing, just like... _No... no, please no_, she murmured in her mind.

She took the 'bowl' in both her hands and slowly turned it over. The jewels, rings, necklaces and so on fell from three holes in the underside of this container and as she turned it over to get a good look at the other side all the jewellery fell out and Lisa's eyes widened further. _Oh no, oh god, please... no_ she held in her hands, its vacant eyes looking up at her, its mouth fixed in that mischievous grin, the Mask of Loki.

Her blood ran cold and she felt her heart momentarily leap into her throat before sinking down into the pit of her stomach. How could this be? She destroyed it, she burnt it, she'd even checked the fire place afterward and it had vanished. Her hands began to shake with the shock of finding the Mask back in her possession again completely unharmed, not even singed or blackened and she could feel in her mind that her deeper self was laughing at her gleefully.

Her shock was about to give way to anger, she wanted to just toss this curse out the window at this moment and let it bother someone else for a change. But another throaty, hacking noise diverted her brain from anger to panic. Marge Simpson, her mom must've worn the Mask last night she reasoned.

Lisa looked down at the jewellery on the bed, there was an awful lot of it and she didn't recognise any of it from mom's jewellery collection. Wherever it came from Lisa doubted mom's ID had acquired it by legitimate means. Quickly she scooped up as much of the jewellery as she could back into the Mask, she let her fingers cover the eye holes so she didn't lose any of it through them and when she'd collected all of it she gently tip toed out of her parents room and back to her own before closing the door behind her.

She leaned against it for a while as if something was going to try to break the door down and discover her. She swallowed as she looked down at the Mask, holding the jewellery. How could the stupid thing still exist? She saw it burn.

Lisa crossed over to her bed and tipped the Mask's contents onto her bed, all the jewels and gold glistened in the low light of the dawning sun through her curtains before returning her attention to the Mask.

_What in the name of thermal dynamics do I have to do to get rid of you?_ She mentally shouted at it. According to her chemistry knowledge the wood should've burned when the fire reached its enthalpy of combustion, but then again according to her knowledge of physics the wood should've shattered when the pressure she was putting on it from the crowbar yesterday reached its breaking strength. She still had the lump on top of her head to remind her of that failure.

"I've had enough of you" she said to it directly releasing some of the stress she had building up in her mind "I hate you" the Mask didn't answer back, instead it just continued that stupid grin of its. "I'm going to make sure no one wears you again for a long, long time."

She crossed over to that lose floor board where she hid the Mask the last time, moved the computer, pulled back the carpet and removed the loose floor board before placing the Mask in the narrow space with those stolen bars of gold and replaced the floor board. She stamped on it and pressed her foot onto the board for good measure before replacing the carpet and moving her computer desk on top of it again.

Now she returned to the problem of the jewellery, not only did she have a number of heavy bars of gold to get rid of, she now had to find a way of disposing of this jewellery. A task that was much easier then getting rid of the gold bars. She could place the jewels into a bag and toss them into the river or something like that, no one would ever know where they went or came from.

She picked up her red dress she'd worn yesterday from the back of a chair and wrapped the jewels in it before neatly folding it and placing it under her bed out of sight. She'd have to try to get rid of these things today, the jewellery would be a start.

Lisa crawled back under her bed covered and intended to sleep for at least a few more hours, but found she couldn't. All this excitement had effectively woke her up and getting back to sleep was no easy task so she just dozed.

She felt slightly better though because with the Mask back in its little hiding place there was no chance it would cause any grief or trouble in her life time at least.

* * *

Marge lay in bed with the mother of all hangovers and every one of her limbs ached and felt weak like they had been drained of all energy. She tried to remember what had happened last night, but it was all just a blur as far as she knew and some of it she was sure didn't really happen, how could it? Must've been the drink she reasoned.

She remembered leaving the house after her disappointment when Homer got food poisoning meaning they couldn't go out together. She also vaguely remembered trying on Bart's Mask but after that everything just got really hazy and unreal, dreamlike. She remembered she was determined to enjoy herself, on her own and left the kids at home by themselves. She remembered going to the Copacabana club and going inside and dancing but after that everything just faded out and she woke up in her bed feeling incredibly groggy.

She also had a hazy vision of a shop full of sparkly diamonds, but couldn't place where this went into the sequence of events. She guessed someone must've spiked her drink. That would make sense she guessed. The unusual gaps in her memory, including some of the more bizarre hallucinations could've been caused by something in her drink, it also explained her drained feeling.

She had to force herself to get up earlier this morning and get changed into her usual clothes, go downstairs and prepare the kids breakfast, feed Maggie and start her usual duties of cleaning the house after whatever mischief the kids had been up to last night, because for some reason that she couldn't work out she never made absolutely sure that she hired a babysitter.

But when she came down stairs she was amazed to see the house was exactly as she had left it. There was no mess at all, just like the other night. Why wasn't there any mess? Bart usually caused some but... but then she remembered Bart was behaving very unusually. All the time yesterday he'd locked himself away in his room and refused to come out.

Then she remembered the knife that was stuck in the wall from the other night, the hole from it was still visible in the living room wall and she still never had a chance to ask him about it.

Marge put all these thoughts out of her mind, she was totally exhausted and had no idea what else she did last night. After she finished cleaning up a little, like washing some pots in the sink she went back to bed to sleep off some of her exhaustion.

Her thoughts turned to Homer, she hoped he was alright in hospital having his stomach pumped. Homer hated hospitals not because he ended up in them almost every day of the week, but he detested hospital food, it was the one thing Homer would never eat except for salad, or health food, or vegetables, or fruit, or fruit cake, or... or... or... Marge's trail of thought slowed as her brain ran down and put up the 'do not disturb' sign. Just before she fell asleep she wondered briefly why she couldn't get the song 'Chain Reaction' out of her head.

* * *

The chief of Police sat uncomfortably in the chair with arms a little too narrow for his broad frame and held his police cap in his hands. He was in a big large room that was decorated in a very old, yet modern style. This was the office of the mayor of Springfield, Joe Quimby, a large, round man with side parted, brown hair that was starting to recede back in his later years. He wore a dark blue suit and red tie and he sat behind a large polished, dark wooden desk that served the purpose of making him look important.

Wiggum was in trouble, deep, deep trouble. He'd failed to apprehend _Green Face_ on several occasions and after last night's attack on the Springfield video game store and the robbery of a local jewellery store he was in it neck deep. Not only was the news criticising him after Kent Brockman and his camera man recorded the police chief, Lou and Ed dancing to _Green Face's_ version of 'Chain Reaction' last night and wrecking the video store, they were also convinced he was an attention seeker after his arm which he'd broken two nights ago had miraculously healed itself without any explanation that Wiggum could come up with, except that _Green Face_ had somehow healed it himself, herself, or whatever.

Wiggum remembered quite clearly the singing and dancing and when he, Lou and Ed actually joined in the ransacking of the video store. But he didn't know why he'd joined in that part, it was as if something else was controlling his body. He had nothing against that video store, except maybe for the time they recommend to him Police Academy 7.

"Damn you Wiggum!" Quimby said thumping his clenched fist down on the desk, the mayor spoke in a Boston accent "Can't you idiots catch one green faced lunatic?"

Quimby was upset because he partly owned the Copacabana club and after the stunt _Green Face_ pulled last night half the staff had been arrested for wrecking the video game store across the road.

"There is an election in November and I want this creep locked up and behind bars before election time comes." Quimby said.

"Hey come on!" Wiggum moaned "How am I supposed to catch this guy? You've seen him on the TV, the guy's almost indestructible, he's bullet proof, it's almost like he's magic."

"Wiggum this isn't Harry Potter, there's no such thing as magic!" Wiggum bellowed clenching his fists.

At that odd moment the fireplace behind Wiggum chose that exact moment to suddenly catch fire by itself. Flames erupted from it as a tall man in an emerald green suit and bowler hat emerged from the fire and dusted himself down.

"Ah..." said the man in a very posh sounding English Accent "Is this a bad time?"

"Not now, Fudge!" Quimby snapped fixing the odd man with an angry stare, "I'm having troubles of my own!"

"I'll come back later" The man in the green suit seemed to spot Wiggum's quizzical look. "Don't mind me" he said "I'm a chimney sweep" and with that he stepped back into the fireplace and vanished again in a puff of flame.

"Boy, you wanna get that fireplace looked at" Wiggum said turning back to Quimby and all thoughts of the strange man vanished from his mind.

"Wiggum focus!" Quimby said slamming his fist back down onto the desk again to get his attention "The media are all over the police force and that's a stone's throw from criticising me as mayor. I don't care what tricks this _Green Face_ tries to fool you with, just find him and arrest him!" he said in such a way that made it clear this was the end of the meeting.

"Well don't worry" Wiggum said with confidence getting to his feet and placing his police cap back over his blue hair "We've got a solid lead we recovered from the jewellery store, soon we'll be one step closer to catching the guy."

"You'd better!" the mayor said getting to his feet and slamming the palms of his hands down onto the surface of the polished desk "because as mayor I worry about the poles!"

"I don't know, they seem fine to me they're doing a great job in my bathroom" Wiggum commented

"The election poles you fool, not the Polish immigrants! The only way I'm going to get re-elected again is if the people of Springfield vote Quimby and they won't unless I can con them again into thinking that I have their safety and best interests at heart, because let's face it they are all stupid morons! But this _Green Face_ is bad publicity for me and it'll make conning everyone more difficult, and if I'm going down because of him I'll make sure information gets out about your monthly kickbacks!"

* * *

Kent Brockman looked very odd as he presented the 8 o'clock news but it might just be Lisa's imagination. It looked like his face had actually developed quite a few wrinkles in it since she last saw the news.

Itchy and Scratchy was on the other side and usually at this time she'd be sitting here with Bart watching the latest episode of the mischievous cat and mouse. But Bart still wasn't coming down stairs because he was still frightened of what she became. She had to admit she was beginning to miss Bart, okay he drove her nuts, he was an insensitive, dumb, unthinking, cruel little monster and, if she was honest she liked having him as a brother as she would like having athletes foot, both were useless and irritating but she was still missing him.

Usually she'd not be one to check the news but she was worried, she had this uneasy feeling about what mom had done while in the Mask last night. If Lisa wasn't such a sceptic she might call it a sixth sense, but she was a sceptic so she put it down to paranoia, paranoia that was well founded because after all anyone who wore the Mask couldn't control themselves.

"Tonight's top stories are..." Kent said shuffling the papers in front of him "The night club Copacobana is being sued due to copyright breaches from the owners of another club of the same name in New York. Pioneering X-ray techniques have proven once and for all that George W. Bush has a brain, though a very small one. And on a visit to New York the mayor of London Boris Johnson was mistaken for a Labrador by the local dog catchers. But first, to nights main story, _Green Face..._" she knew it "Man, monster, or a harmless loon? That's what the police force hope to answer in the next few days. Police Chief Clancy Wiggum said in a recent press conference that a major breakthrough has occurred in the case." The picture turned to a view of Police Chief Wiggum behind a podium in city hall. In front of him were dozens of foldaway chairs in which sat dozens of reporters all ready to get the latest scoop.

_What break through?_ Lisa wondered worry starting to creep into her mind _what could they possibly have found?_

"Ladies and gentlemen" Wiggum called for silence "Ladies and Gentlemen please, we have a major break in the case." He said holding up his hands for silence "We recovered a single strand of blue hair from the jewellery store robbery last night, now once our forensic boys down at the lab analyse this strand we can find out once and for all if we should call this guy a he or a she, and we can see if we have a match in our DNA database, any questions?"

"Yeah" said a voice from off screen "Wasn't your arm broken two nights ago?"

"No comment" Wiggum said quickly.

Oh no, oh no, oh no, no, no, no. It was just as Lisa had feared, whatever mom did last night she'd left a trace of herself in the form of a strand of hair, a strand of hair with a tag that will contain Simpson DNA and from the 'Who Shot Mr. Burns' incident she knew that the Simpson DNA profile was in the police database and as soon as they find a match they'll know where to look. In fact just looking at each of the Simpsons family members and comparing them with the images of _Green Face_ was probably enough to get them all arrested.

Kent went on to explain what mom, aka the _adult Female Green Face_, had done last night. Robbed a jewellery store where she lost that hair strand, caused trouble at the Copacabana before destroying a video game store. But Lisa wasn't really listening, she was starting to sweat with worry, her mouth was dry and she was beginning to tremble, she had to fix this, she had to fix this once and for all, somehow.

Lisa jumped off the couch and ran upstairs to her bedroom and quickly shut the door. What was she going to do? Once they made the connection they'd come to the house and start asking questions, maybe even arrest mom and if they did a search of the house then they'd find not only the jewellery but the solid gold bars Lisa herself had stolen under the influence of the Mask.

The Mask! It was dusk outside and soon the stupid lump of wood would become active. In her panicked state of mind she wasn't thinking straight as she pulled the computer desk away from the wall, ripped up the carpet, removed the floor board and retrieved the mischievous artefact.

She could easily dispose of those stolen goods with the help of this thing, it would only take a second or two but would that be all the time her alter ego needed to completely take control of her again?

She stared for a long time into the back of the Mask torn between fear of the police finding out about mom, herself and the incriminating articles, and the fear that her alter ego would take control of her again and who knows what havoc she'd cause.

The Mask started to sparkle and glow but Lisa resisted that hypnotic gleam that makes you put it on because she had a good reason to. But what was she going to do? She needed to get rid of these things before the police came knocking on their door, and more than that, maybe she could break into the police station and cause havoc with the DNA readings, but that would mean wearing the Mask for longer then she'd like.

She began bringing the Mask closer and closer to her face having finally convinced herself of the necessity of this. A bright green glow flowed from the edges of the Mask which brought back the memories of the struggle she'd had with her ID persona the last time. She pushed the wooden thing away from her face and tossed it across the room like it was a savage animal intent on biting her.

She couldn't do it, she knew she wasn't strong enough, the moment she put it on she'll lost herself, there was no way she could control it. But Bart could! Or at least he maintained some form of control as far as she could tell because he acted very similarly under the influence of the Mask to the way he usually acts.

She looked back at her bed that concealed the hidden jewellery, then back at the hole in the floor which hid the golden bars. She had to do this, she had to get rid of them but she couldn't do it by herself.

She quickly walked over to where the Mask had landed and snatched it up, wrenched open the door of her bedroom and went over to Bart's room. She hesitated before opening the door. Bart was still afraid of her or what the Mask made of her so when she appeared in his bed room holding the Mask she didn't know what was going to happen. Would he shrink away in fear or would he pounce on her, ready to rip it from her grasp? Gulping a little in fear herself she gently knocked on the door three times.

"Bart" she called out but no reply came "Bart, can I come in?" still no reply, but she could hear movement from inside somewhere, the sound of feet running away and a light click.

Gently she took the door knob, turned it and opened the door. Lisa gingerly entered the very untidy bedroom and crossed over to the foot of Bart's bed. As far as she could tell there wasn't anyone in the room, so where the heck could he be at this hour? But she was sure she'd heard someone in here though while she was outside.

She checked on the other side of the bed, it was the only other place Bart could hide from her apart from the closet. She slowly approached the closet door and gently opened it and found a large pile of clothes on the floor. A pile that Bart was hiding under, she could tell because his left foot was just showing from under the pile and a red shirt had unmistakable spiked grooves in it from his hair.

"Bart" Lisa said gently and the pile began to shiver. She still couldn't imagine the torment Bart must be feeling after her alter ego's revenge run the other night but she was eager to make her peace with him. "Bart I know you're under there" she said in a low, harmless voice.

"Leave me alone" came a voice from under the pile, Bart's voice.

"Bart I need your help" she said deciding to try to get to the point. She pulled off the shirt that was covering his head so she could look into his frightened eyes. He looked at her like a pathetic child waiting to get smacked for doing nothing at all, a look that made Lisa feel even worse. Then when he saw the Mask in her hands he tried to shrink even further away from her. "Bart, I need you to wear the Mask" she said at last, and when she did Bart stopped shivering in fear but still had a suspicious look about him.

It might've been a very foolish move on her part but she tossed the wooden mask into Bart's lap.

"I can't control what I become when I wear it" Lisa said quickly "and I need it's powers to get rid of something"

Bart looked down at the Mask with wonder in his eyes at first, but then when he returned his gaze to Lisa he was looking accusingly at her obviously unsure whether this was a trick or not.

"Bart please" she pleaded "Mom wore it last night and caused a lot of trouble, the police are onto who _Green Face_ is and if they come here we're all in trouble!"

Bart looked torn between putting the Mask on again and just throwing it back in her face –hopefully not on her face- but there was uncertainty there not a lot but could be enough to stop him putting it on. He just needed a little bit of a push, Lisa decided.

"Fine" she said letting her voice adopt an annoyed tone as she snatched the Mask from Bart's fingers "If you won' help me then I'll have to do this myself" she hoped this bluff would do it because if she hesitated putting the Mask on for a second Bart would know she was insincere about this act, but would it be enough?

Just as the cold wood was about to touch her face the Mask had been wrenched from her fingers by Bart's grasping hands and he rammed it on his own face. Lisa had to shield her eyes the moment it made contact with him because a brightly burst of light erupted around his form and shot out in all directions with a loud bang of a thunder crack followed by one or two quieter thunder cracks.

The Mask had warped itself around Bart's head very quickly, his skeleton lit up from within with another flash and within seconds of putting it on Bart's form twisted into a rapidly rotating tornado which fired out of the closet nearly running Lisa down. The transformation this time appeared to be much quicker then when either of them originally wore the Mask, she guessed it was because those times they'd resisted the hold it tried to take on them while this time Bart probably embraced becoming his alter ego again.

The whirling stopped and standing there, arms flung out wide like a magician completing an impressive magic trick was Bart's Mask alter ego. He grinned his large cartoon grin full of massive white teeth and pushed a large lock of hair away from his eyes, dark, spiky hair with many long points shooting away at odd angles that still looked like a jesters hat when viewed it its entirety.

The larger then normal eyes swivelled in their sockets to look at Lisa, all sense of fear of her was abolished from them along with what else the Mask inhibited in Bart's personality.

"Hey! Remember MEEEEE?" he said chuckling, mimicking how Lisa's alter ego had greeted him the last time.

Lisa gulped and then sighed a little because she knew what was going to come now, something Bart would obviously like to get out of his system. "Okay Bart, let's get this over with."

Suddenly he was standing right next to her uncomfortably close and looked up at the ceiling with an innocent, idle look on his face. "I don't know what you mean" he said unconvincingly.

"You know what I mean, let's just get it over and done with." She braced herself.

"I honestly have no idea what you're talking about, oh sister of mine" he paused but just for a second "but could it possibly be..." _Oh boy here it comes_ she thought and closed her eyes.

What happened next was so fast Lisa nearly didn't understand what had happened. First Bart gave her a wedgie that went over her head and snapped over her chin. When she removed that garment from her face she found a pie about to ram roughly into her face, and it did and it tasted of Sheppard's pie –probably to make a mockery of her vegetarianism she guessed- and as she wiped the meat pie from her face it was then followed by a classical lemon pie that smacked forcefully into her face.

As she wiped the baked confection from her eyes and spat out some crumbs that had gone into her mouth and up her nose she said "Okay..." as she wiped as much as she could off her face "settled?"

"Not by a long shot" Bart said to her with a mischievous evil like gleam in his eyes as he reached into his trouser pockets and pulled out a roll of paper that uncoiled onto the ground, rolled the length of the room and still hadn't completely uncoiled. It was covered with lines and lines and lines of prank ideas. "I've got to finish this list first before I can ever say we're 'even'."

He returned his attention to the list and crossed off two items on the paper with a feather like quill. "Now item number three" he said "Spray Lisa with cat pee!"

This was going to be more difficult then Lisa anticipated, and all the while Bart was making a lot of noise, if mom came up and found them like this then the game was really up. All this just started to mount the level of panic in her brain, she had to convince Bart to cooperate.

"Bart listen, I need you to do something" she tried to say but Bart cut across her as he began filling a large super soaker like water gun with a liquid of a unusual huge and pungent smell. "Maybe I'll listen when we reach item number 34, make Lisa eat bugs through a straw!"

"What the heck's going on up there?" came moms voice.

Lisa didn't know if it was moms voice that made her do what she did next but the mounting panic was quickly giving way to annoyance and anger. She reached out and grabbed Bart's shirt and pulled him so close to her face it was threatening. Their eyes were only inches apart as Lisa hissed through gritted teeth "Listen buster, that thing on your face has caused me enough grief and misery! So either you do this for me, or prey I have mercy when I get a hold of that mask again."

Lisa's outburst had an effect on Bart version 2. His eyes at first looked almost fearful but quickly sank back into their mischievous grin. "Then I'll just have to make sure you don't get the Mask then." He said and tired to pull himself away from her.

"Come here!" Lisa said as she grabbed the lump at the side of Bart's head that was where his ears would've been and began pulling him along like a parent with an unruly child.

"Owwww! Moooomm!" he wasn't calling for their mom, just whining at Lisa like a pathetic sounding kid, probably because he was.

"Don't you mom me" she found herself saying as she pulled Bart by the ear like thing on his head, across the landing and into her bedroom where she let go of him.

"I need you to get rid of these" she said as she ducked under her bed and lifted her other red dress which contained the stolen jewellery, she unwrapped it before crossing over to the hole in the floor and lifted out all the gold bars and dropped them on top of the bed as well, one by one. As Lisa dropped gold bar after gold bar on her bed Bart's eyes widened further, and further and his jaw dropped open and made a clang like a hammer hitting an anvil when it stopped. His irises in his large eyes then formed into green dollar signs when she'd put the last gold brick down.

"I need you to get rid of these gold bars" she said pointing at them "and return this jewellery back to the shop it came from" Bart's eyes deflated back into his head, his jaw retracted into his skull and his irises became black and round again.

"Return them? You should've kept your receipt. What am I, your errand boy?" Bart said crossing his arms over his chest and tilting his head to one side to show he didn't care about her situation one nanometre.

"Listen Bart" she said thinking fast "The gold, you can do whatever you like with it, toss it through someone's front window, drop it on someone's feet, melt it down and force it into people's car exhausts, I don't care just get rid of them"

"That last one's actually a good idea" Bart said as he pulled out that long list of prank ideas from his pocket again, a list that Lisa was unaware Bart had put away, and wrote that one down.

"Just return the jewellery to the jewellery store, it's just a couple of blocks from Moe's, dads usual drinking hole" she explained.

"Hey you're my sister" he said as he came uncomfortably close to her and put his left arm around her shoulders, her body stiffened expecting him to give her another wedgie, but it didn't come. "Of course I'll do this, but what's in it for me?" Lisa had her answer ready. "If you do this for me, then I'll... I'll... I'll let you keep the Mask, I won't try to take it away from you again. You can have it!"

"Why?" Bart asked at once "why let me have it?"

He wasn't going to make this easy for her "Because I can't imagine you getting any worse then you already are!" she nearly screamed at him, why wouldn't he just do it?

There was a long pause and Bart began playing with his dreadlock like spiky hair as if he was considered the proposition but Lisa knew he just enjoyed watching her worry. "Okay" he said finally "return jewels, get rid of gold and I can do whatever I like for the rest of the night?"

"Yes!" Lisa said, but then remembered something else "Just one more thing though" she said hurriedly "The police somehow got a hair sample from mom, they'll test if for DNA and match it to hers. If they do then we'll all be in trouble. I need you to go to the police station and destroy that hair sample and anything relating to its testing."

"Then I can do whatever I want?"

"Yes" Lisa nodded wanting him to just get on with it.

"Okay" Bart said as he stood in front of her, held out his hand in front of his face , hawked back and spat a blob of snot into his palm and held it out to her to shake as a sign of a deal. Lisa shrank away from the mucus covered hand in disgust, what was wrong with a regular handshake? Despite her disgust Lisa reluctantly copied Bart's hand shake preparation with her own hand and clasped his outstretched one. Her insides squirmed at the feeling of Barts and her own snot squelching between their fingers.

With the deal sealed Bart went over to the pile of gold bricks, picked them up rapidly and put them in his jacket pockets which didn't bulge or get larger as he piled them inside, and scooped up all the jewellery from the bed and put that in his jacket as well.

Lisa's window suddenly slid open and Bart ran and leapt over and jumped the ledge while shouting "Watch out Springfield, its morphing time!"

With Bart gone Lisa looked at her hand she'd shook his with in disgust and began wiping away the sticky substance from her hand onto a spare sheet of blank paper from her desk.

"Oh just one more thing!" said Bart's voice as Lisa felt another wedgie being pulled over her head "You know Lis', you've got some pretty strong knickers!" he commented before she heard him shoot off through the window again, and it was only just now that Lisa considered if she had really done the smart thing.

* * *

**To Be Continued...**

* * *

**Authors notes:** The man in the emerald suit coming out of Quimby's fireplace after the mayor stated magic wasn't real is a reference to the beginning of the Harry Potter book the Deathly Hallows, and was just something to add a little more Simpson madness to the situation.

Hope everyone enjoys the new chapter


	21. Guess who's Bad! Who's Bad? I'm Bad!

**Chapter 20**

**Guess who's Bad! Who's Bad? I'm Bad!**

Something felt very odd Marge Simpson admitted, very, very odd.

On the table was a newspaper the _Springfield Times_, the front page read. _Green Face strikes again!_ Nothing very unusual about the paper itself or the headline, it had been the picture that had grabbed her attention the moment it was delivered. It was of an adult female _Green Face_. Marge had heard of kids growing up fast these days but that was ridicules, _Green Face_ had gone from about Lisa's age to about Marge's own age in a day, and that was impossible. But as she thought about it _Green Face_ had also changed gender and age before so who's to say he couldn't become an adult female either, why he'd want to do that Marge didn't know but it said to her that _Green Face_ was a very disturbed individual.

There was a connection forming in her head, but her brain, having had years of practice being a stubborn mother and wife, refused to allow it to complete that connection and tried to block it further out by getting on with some household chores.

Hours later she became concerned with a loud amount of banging coming from above and a lot of commotion, undoubtedly from Bart and Lisa fighting again. A quick shout upstairs from their mother seemed to have calmed them down though.

As she went back to her house work however she was stopped by the door bell ringing. She answered it wondering who would be calling so late at night and was surprised to find Homer standing there very pale skinned swaying on his feet before falling down to the floor in a heap. Behind him was a tall, stern faced looking paramedic who looked like his patience had already been exhausted. Behind him parked at the road side was an ambulance.

"Are you Marge Simpson?" he asked, to which Marge nodded. "We've brought your husband home."

"I thought you were treating him?" Marge asked looking at the obviously intoxicated Homer as he slowly dragged himself along the floor into the house. "And, if you don't mind me asking why did it take so long to send him home?"

"We did treat him, we hooked him up to the stomach pump and pumped his stomach" Marge nodded taking this in "Then when our backs were turned he flipped it into reverse and filled himself almost at bursting point." Marge didn't really want to hear that part. Homer didn't like hospital food but she didn't expect him to go so far not to eat any.

"But he didn't eat that much did he?" Marge said a little embarrassed by her husband's behaviour.

"Mrs. Simpson we used that machine to pump the stomachs of several other people before your husband." Marge would rather have not known that specific detail. "It took us three times as long to pump his stomach again..."

"Okay, I get where this is going" Marge said in a hurry, she was only just recovering from a morning of her head down the toilet herself, she didn't need anything else that'll upset her stomach again. She turned to see Homer laying on the floor unconscious "But what's wrong with him now?"

"A friend of his came in and gave him a few presents, Barney Bumball and he didn't bring grapes." The paramedic said dropping a squashed six pack of beer cans onto the floor still in the plastic wrapping and each printed with the word Duff.

If Marge wasn't so used to being embarrassed by her husband her cheeks would be glowing bright red with embarrassment, but as it was she could only look slightly embarrassed. She apologised to the medic for Homers behaviour and let him get on his way.

Marge turned back to her husband who was now sleeping peacefully on the carpet his mouth slobbering a little as he snored. He'll hibernate until morning now Marge realised and so decided to let him sleep there while she got on with the rest of the house work.

It was as she passed the TV area that she noticed something else odd. She'd turned the TV on earlier because she liked to listen to the news while doing her morning chores. But unfortunately having slept for most of the day she missed the morning programs and the afternoon programs so she was just in time to see the evening news.

The show was 'Channel six news with Kent Brockman' who appeared to have had a reverse face lift or something because his face was really sagging.

_That's odd_ Marge thought, that funny image of Kent had stirred a faint memory in her mind. It was a memory of her putting her hand behind Kent's head, removing a sort of clip and seeing his face drop like it was melting. She was going to push this memory aside as another hallucination when Kent suddenly mentioned the words 'robbed' 'jewellery Store' and 'Copacabana' and more memories seemed to stir in her head. She recalled being at the Copacabana but she also had memories of being at a jewellery store a few hours before. She turned back to watch the rest of the news broadcast.

"..._Green Face,_ now in an adult female form, appeared to have sexual powers to command people what she pleased of them. Not satisfied with robbing a jewellery store she then went on to disturb the public at the Copacabana, and then with the residence of the club under her new powers she commanded them to tear down and destroy a local video store that was soon to release the expansion pack to Springfield's most popular video game Grand Theft Scratchy IV."

Okay, maybe this was just a coincidence that _Green Face_ kinda looks like her and they were both there at the Copacabana at the same time, but a sinking feeling in Marge's stomach was trying to tell her otherwise but she used her stubbornly mother/wife like ways to push it away so it didn't manifest itself into a thought.

"Green Face though caused destruction also entertained as she and her controlled mob sang and danced to her own version of Chain Reaction, a song originally sang by performer Diana Ross."

The picture changed to a view of female _Green Face_ singing and dancing to chain reaction with her mob. The ridicules thought Marge's brain was trying to have was obviously wrong, because she could never sing or dance like that, not that well, not to save her life. But she was curious why she couldn't see the familiar puff of blue hair in the background picture that signified where she was. Maybe she left early, maybe she...

"So far _Green Face _has morphed his form more often than Doctor Who. Viewers may remember the pictures of the four faces of _Green Face_."

A picture came up on the screen showing the adult Female _Green Face_ that looked a little like Marge herself, then that picture switched to the little, child female _Green Face_ that looked a little like Lisa which was followed by the boy _Green Face_ that looked a little like Bart, then the adult male _Green Face_ that looked a lot like Homer but with plastic hair. Seeing them individually she hadn't noticed the resemblance. The next picture had all four of them together.

Her brain was going into denial at first, a mental barrier to stop these thoughts penetrating her brain, but that barrier was slowly starting to crumble when she looked at a picture mounted on top of the TV which showed the whole Simpson family, Bart, Lisa, Homer and herself holding Maggie. Looking between the picture and the TV the four family members looked very even more similar to the four faces of _Green Face_, in fact no they looked a lot similar, so similar they could be the same people.

In her denial to accept what she was thinking she started idly playing with a ring around her wedding ring finger. But the ring she was rubbing was not her wedding ring she realised, her wedding ring was there, tight as a drum, it had never left that finger for years, what she was feeling was a ring just in front of that one and it had a stone set into it. Marge looked down and saw the gold ring with the dark red shining ruby on her wedding ring finger. Okay maybe Homer got her that ring for her birthday, yeah maybe that was it.

_Get real_ said a voice in her head _Homer bought you a bowling ball called 'Homer' for your birthday, remember_.

_What the hell is going on around here? _It wasn't often Marge cursed even in her own mind but something was really wrong here and as she thought harder the memories of last night were getting clearer. She did remember singing and dancing to Chain Reaction, and she remembered _Green Face_ being there. What she wasn't expecting though was to be seeing these events through the eyes of _Green Face_ herself. Singing dancing, ordering the destruction of the video store, it all started flooding back into her mind and it was her doing it all. This was too much, she had to sit down.

Leaving the TV to chatter to itself Marge entered the kitchen, quickly pulled a bottle of wine from the wrack next to the microwave, took a glass out from a cupboard and quickly poured herself a glass of wine. It wasn't brandy but it would be good enough for her.

Taking a swing and swallowing she felt her senses sharpen slightly and her mind cleared of what she was thinking. Except for one image, the earliest image she could remember of that night before the weirdness started. She remembered the wooden mask.

* * *

As the paramedic walked back to his ambulance he was stopped by the form of a small boy who he could swear wasn't there a few moments ago. He leapt back at the sight of Bart Simpson still wearing the Mask who had an expectant look on his face.

"Hey, nice of ya to bring Homer home" he said in that odd sounding voice the Mask seemed to grant him "But tell me, why didn't you do anything cool to him? Like give him a sheep's stomach, sow up his mouth, chop his hands off, hell even give him one of those cool steel claws? You didn't even operate on him properly!"

The paramedic took a step back with a look of horror on his face as he recognised the face. "G-G-G-G _GREEN FACE_!" he screamed pushing past Bart, leaping into his ambulance, starting up the engine and racing off at almost twice the speed limit.

Bart just watched him vanish into the distance a look of disappointment etched onto his face. "I've heard of Dr. Doolittle" he said in a cockney accent "that must be Dr. Doo-bugger-all." For a moment he considered racing after him and causing a little cartoon style mayhem like he sees in cartoons, but the weight of all this gold in his pockets reminded him of the mission he was given, and like all eleven year old boys he was going to treat this mission like a game. If he can get rid of all these objects in less than ten minutes then he wins, if not, well he still wins because it's his game.

Swinging his arms around he forced himself into a rapid spinning tornado before racing off towards town.

This was just incredible, so incredible it was almost indescribable. It was great to be back in the saddle –or back in the Mask-, it felt like he'd just been grated the best freedom anyone could have. The freedom to do whatever you wanted, cause whatever mischief you liked and with the powers to indulge his every whim and desire and to hell with the consequences.

Okay, checklist, he thought mentally, 1 get rid of gold bars, 2 return jewels and 3 go to the police station and stop the forensic tests.

He wanted to question himself, ask _why the hell should I do what Lisa wants?_ But for some reason he found it hard to think about his actions and instead had to just act on his instincts, just like the last time he wore the Mask, and the instincts of Bart Simpson were obvious, cause havoc, have fun and make sure people notice and paid attention, cause if he wasn't getting attention then he wasn't doing his job properly.

As he entered Springfield Square he spied the statue of the town's hero. Jebediah Springfieldand a suitably mischievous thought came into his head. He moved to look at the statues plaque on the base, 'A Noble Spirit Embiggens the Smallest Man' and briefly Bart remembered the time he defaced the statue by cutting off its head. That had really gotten the towns goat then, though he regretted it at the time he was in no capacity to feel bad about what he was about to do now.

Reaching into his deep jacket pockets he pulled out the countless number of stolen gold bars. Though he really wanted to stuff these up car exhausts like Lisa suggested what he was about to do with them now was more amusing to him

He leapt up towards the tall statue on the plinth and sent himself into another rapid spin. Anyone watching would've seen the statue be enveloped by a big green and black blur swirling all around it. When it had stopped Bart was standing at the foot of the 'new' statue. Bart himself was dressed in a white painters robe with multiple multicoloured stains on it, a black bray on his head and a crude short beard scribbled in pencil on his chin. He held up his thumb to the statue as if judging its scale.

The statue still featured Jebediah Springfield, only he was now bent over, wide eyed, mouth open in surprise, possibly a scream as behind him stood a gold statue of Bart's Mask persona grinning madly as he gave Springfield a wedgie.

"Manifico!" Bart proclaimed in a French accent "That really makes the statue come alive. I say it represents the joker in every man, as well as mans unending abuse and torture in the modern day. That and never turn your back on a school bully!"

He turned on his heels and gave a bow to an imaginary crowd for a job well done. Though the crowd was imaginary their applauding could clearly be heard in the real world, because Bart wanted it to be heard, he wanted it to be as real as possible.

Unfortunately his act had gone un-noticed by the populace because there was no populace, the place was deserted. There was one drunken bum in the gutter a little ways off who was clearly looking straight at him in amazement, but that wasn't the sort of person he wanted spreading this news, who would believe him? He was a drunk. Bart was disappointed because the only person to witness this display was no doubt someone who claimed to see Batman and Robin every night.

To make absolutely sure his master piece didn't get miss identified he scrawled over the plague, 'A Noble Spirit, Embiggens the Smallest Man' so they now had the words 'Green Face waz here!' spray painted in green pain across it. It was complete!

Reaching into his pocket Bart pulled out a sheet of paper. "1, get rid of gold bars, check!" he said drawing a little tick next to the words on the paper with a pencil he didn't have a few seconds ago. The next item was 'return jewels'

"Now, onwards!" he proclaimed as his current costume seemed to morph back into his usual jacket and clothes. Twisting his arms around his body he let it rotate around so he became the tornado again, the only way to travel when you have the power to do it all.

He fired off in a particular direction and despite not knowing where on earth this jewellery shop was he was standing outside it the moment he stopped rotating, as if the Mask knew where he wanted to go and then took him there anyway.

The building was dark, the lights were out and it had obviously been left the way Mom had left it the night before. Crisscrossing over the front door were long streams of tape with the words 'Police Line, Do Not Cross' but of course saying 'Do Not Cross' to Bart was like saying 'Come on in and have fun.'

Bart very slickly walked up to the door and had a look of innocents on his face and he whistled idly pretending to be doing nothing. Something he knew was pointless because no one was really watching him anyway.

He banished his look of innocents as he opened up the mail slot in the door and pressed his face up against the narrow opening, and with an odd sensation he felt his body squeeze and pass through it as if it was made of jelly. He had to wiggle his short legs a little before they passed through but he was in. Collecting his liquid form into a puddle on the floor his own shape began to reconstitute itself and reform until he was whole again.

That was a really odd feeling. I_s that how all the crap in dads gut feels when it's being forced out through a tiny hole?_ Bart thought crudely getting to his feet.

Reaching into his pocket he produced the jewels and stuff, but rather then put them all back neatly and tidily he just inverted his hands and let them all scatter onto the floor, hey Lisa only said to return them, nothing about putting them back in the right places.

With that done he turned on his heels and prepared to leave via the front door when...

"FREEZE _GREEN FACE_!" someone shouted and that's what Bart did, he jumped first into a ridicules pose while standing on one leg, arms held halfway in a pose of surprise and turned completely into a transparent statue of ice.

"Huh, what the...?" said the voice. From Barts frozen point of view someone entered his field of vision. It was the round form of Police Chief Wiggum and his other two stooges. Wiggum looked confused and surprised at Bart or _Green Face_ for actually freezing like that and even approached him and tapped lightly on his head with the barrel of his gun.

A hairline crack formed where his gun barrel lightly touched him and in a few seconds the crack had spread all over his ice covered body which then shattered and broke apart, falling to the floor in a pile of ice crystals.

"Was that really _Green Face_?" asked the tall black cop.

"No, I'm Jack Frost!" Bart bubbled through the puddle his melting icy crystal body had formed. "Just thought I'd soak up some of the atmosphere" he quipped, it was a bad quip but he didn't care.

"You don't fool me _Green Face_" Wiggum said confidently pointing his gun down at the pool of water. "Rule number one of investigation. The suspect always returns to the scene of a crime."

"Really?" Bart asked as he allowed his form to condense back up and reform "that explains why so many Australians move back to England" he said with a cockney twang to his voice.

"You're not going to joke your way out of this one funny guy" Wiggum said as the other three cops surrounded him with their guns drawn. "You're coming down town with us."

Bart considered for a moment if he should just play a prank on these losers and beat it before the real police got here. But then a thought came into his head, why bother wasting his powers to get to the police station if these idiots will take him down anyway?

"Okaydocky!" Bart said holding up his hands to show they were now cuffed, despite none of the cops having cuffed his hands. But what seemed to surprise Wiggum more was when, in the blink of an eye the green faced Bart was now in a straight jacket with arms tied behind his back, two thick long chains curling around his arms and shoulders held together with a padlock and a cage like mask over his mouth, the one you use to stop psychopath's biting you. Bart didn't know what it was really called, only that in this instant it just looked kinda cool. Around his ankles were also two ball and chains. "But can I ride in the front?" he added.

* * *

Meanwhile, at Moes

The phone of the grubby bar rang and Moe answered it

"Moe's Tavern" Moe said while he wiped a dirty beer glass with a filthy rag.

"Hello, I'm looking for a Mr. Hardy, first name Iva" said caller.

"One moment I'll check" Moe turned to his other customers "Umm. Is a Mr. Hardy here, Mr. Iva Hardy. Hey everyone listen to me, Iva Hardy here?"

The bar was filled with the roar of laughter and it took Moe a few moments to work out why they were laughing. _Iva Hardy, I have a Hardy_ "Hey wait a minute!"

The caller on the other side had also started laughing out loud.

* * *

"Give me that" Wiggum yelled snatching the CB radio from _Green Face_'s hands. Wiggum had no clue how the boy had gotten a hold of this while sitting in the back seat behind a wire mesh, but somehow he had.

"Listen you" Wiggum heard whoever was on the other side "when I get a hold of you I'm gonna chop you up into tiny pieces and feed you to my gold fish!" wait Wiggum recognised that voice. It was Moe, the owner of a bar a few blocks away. How on earth had _Green Face_ managed to contact a telephone using this? Deciding it was best if he didn't ask about any of this wackiness he put the radio speaker back in its holder.

The ride from the jewellery shop to the police station was anything but uneventful. All the way there _Green Face_ kept hawking back and spitting out a widow which somehow kept opening despite how many times Wiggum closed it again. He had to admit though the mischievous... he didn't know what he was, was quite a good spitter. The boy managed to catch a pedestrian right in the ear while they were driving down the street, he had good aim.

The drive was also annoying because the kid had sunk to mental torture by saying "Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?" over and over again in a verity of ridicules sounding voices. Wiggum tried his best to just ignore this, and eventually the boy seemed to settle down when he realised he wasn't getting the desired reaction. But every now and then when Wiggum peered at the rear view mirror he could swear _Green Face_ was pulling freaky faces at him while he wasn't looking. Wiggum was going to show some leniency towards _Green Face_ because it was him after all who'd somehow magically healed his arm the previous night but the guy was really starting to get on his nerves.

Though _Green Face_ had calmed down to some extent when they arrived the lunacy didn't stop there. When they took his finger prints down at the station they were surprised to find that, despite having nothing on his fingers, his fingers didn't produce finger prints when pressed onto the card but a series of letters, S C R W U, on one hand and A S H O L on the other, read them the right way and Wiggum understood what it was supposed to spell, and even he had to admit it was funny, insulting but funny.

Now they were all sat down in an interview room with _Green Face_ now out of his ridicules straight jacket and other bindings except for the hand cuffs. The boy was sitting behind a desk with Wiggum and Lou on the other side. Wiggum had offered the green boy an attorney to speak on his behalf but the boy refused.

"Come on 'Piggum' get this show on the road, I've got stuff to do" he commented swinging his feet up onto the desk and leaning back in his chair with his hands behind his head looking very relaxed. Since the suspect had refused a lawyer to defend himself Wiggum proceeded with the interview.

He set out a tape recorder, put a fresh tape in it and hit the record button before placing it on the table.

"Police Chief Clancy Wiggum and Officer Lou..."

"What's that for?" _Green Face_ asked disturbing Wiggum's set up for the interview, Wiggum was annoyed and wanted to tell the boy to can it, but at the same time the little guy actually sounded genuinely curious, so Wiggum answered.

"By law we have to record everything that's said and done in an interview." Wiggum explained.

"Really?" the suspect asked "So any noise I make will be recorded onto this machine and used in evidence?"

"Yes" Wiggum answered not liking the boys mischievous grin one bit.

The boy sat up and rubbed his wrists, how did he get those hand cuffs off? He leaned in close to the recording machine and smacked his hands together so they created a loud bang and screamed "OW!".

"What did you do that for?" the boy asked into the tape recorder "You did it didn't you, you did it, you did it, confess!" Wiggum's jaw dropped, the boy was mimicking his voice perfectly and if anyone heard this his police career would be over.

"Attention listeners, this is not me saying these things!" Wiggum tried to say as _Green Face_ gripped his own neck in both his hands and made a choking noise. He squeezed so hard his eyes were actually ballooning out with a slight popping noise from his eye sockets.

"Help me, help me!" _Green Face_ said through his constricted wind pipe "He's choking me, this cops trying to kill me!"

This mad display was interrupted by a light knocking on the door, it opened a moment later and a man walked into the room. It was Dr. Arthur Neuman, the psychologist Wiggum spoke to a few days ago. The chief of Police was sure he was going to have difficulty talking to _Green Face_ so he'd invited the psychotherapist back to try to keep the green boy under control.

"3:30am, Dr. Arthur Neuman has just entered the room" Wiggum announced into the tape recorder.

"Good evening" Neuman said in his slow, boring droll as he took a seat next to_ Green Face_. "You must be _Green Face_, Neuman said taking a seat next to the boy. "I am Dr. Arthur Neuman, Ph.D in psychology and author of the bestselling book 'the Masks we Wear'"

The boy however didn't seem interested in what Dr. Neuman had to say. Instead the spiky haired trouble maker seemed more interested in the man's larger than average head with the thinning hair all around it.

"Wow, you've got a massive head!" the boy commented.

"Yes, I'm glad you noticed" Neuman said with a slight drip of sarcasm in his voice.

"Doesn't that big head cause you problems going through revolving doors?" _Green Face_ then made a movement with his hands and head showing a head being trapped in a door.

"No, it doesn't cause me any problems at all" Neuman answered boringly.

"Yeah, I take your point, a big head doesn't cause the owner a problem, it causes the owners 'mother' a problem" the boy grinned showing his massive white teeth "How did she cope?"

"She coped just fine" Neuman said clearly missing the joke.

"After we're done here I'll take you to a hall of mirrors and show you how you should look" the boy joked but again Neuman didn't seem to get it, but Wiggum could hear Lou struggling to hold back a slight laugh. The boy also looked genuinely confused that his jokes weren't provoking the right reaction out of Neuman.

"Lets get on with this interview shall we?" Neuman suggested.

"I'd rather not governor" the boy said in a cockney accent again "I can't get over how big that head of yours is. On hot days to people follow you around for the shade?" again Neuman didn't seem to bite "Your head is just enormous, you know on a normal sized head, 'that'..." he pointed at Neumans short, thinning hair "...would be a full head of hair!"

This was going to be even more difficult then Wiggum imagined.

* * *

Okay, okay, okay, maybe Bart won't cause much trouble, Lisa considered as she paced the room. Maybe he'll just dispose of the items, steal the hair sample and come back. Lisa thought nervously as she pressed the tips of her fingers together. Or maybe he'll go to the theatre and catch an R rated movie with his new super powers.

Oh no, wait what was Lisa thinking? Bart wouldn't waste this opportunity to cause some trouble and wouldn't care one pico-metre of the consequences, and that was him without the Mask.

Bart had been gone for two hours and in that time Lisa had come to her senses. She'd only given Bart the Mask in desperation but now she really regretted it. Who knew what Bart was doing right now with that curse hugging his face and in all honestly Lisa almost didn't care as long as he got rid of the stolen items. But what if he caused more trouble, what if he lead the police here, what if someone manages to get the Mask off his face? That was a point, as far as she knew Bart didn't know the Mask only worked at night so what if someone sees the un-transformation of _Green Face_ back into Bart Simpson?

To take her mind off it she'd replaced the loose floor board, carpet and computer over the hiding place where she hid the Mask earlier but as soon as she'd finished putting all that stuff back her anxiety came back, she was too anxious to read a book or play the saxophone, meditate or anything like that, she couldn't stop worrying what Bart was doing out there, hopefully nothing illegal. Lisa didn't want to go to prison, she didn't see herself as a jailbird, she wanted to go to Harvard University and get a degree or thirteen, not rotting away in some jail cell with nothing to read but the dreary writings of Daniel Steel.

There came a light tapping from her bedroom door. "Lisa" said a voice, it was mom "Lisa, I want to talk to you, can I come in?"

Lisa didn't really want her to come in, moms had a sixth sense for detecting when something was wrong. The second she steps in here she'd sense that Lisa was keeping something from her and if mom saw her like this she wouldn't stop badgering her about it. But just telling her to go away would make her more suspicious, she'd have to answer.

"Just a minute mom" she called back, as she closed her eyes and tried to compose herself as much as possible, but it wasn't working. Now standing totally still she could feel herself shaking like a leaf.

"Lisa, I want to ask about that mask" Lisa's heart jumped into her throat and threatened to strangle her the moment mom had finished that sentence. Okay, maybe she didn't really remember the Mask's powers and just wanted to know where it went. It was a fickle ideal but she didn't want mom finding out about the Mask of Loki.

Although maybe it was for the best that mom did find out, surely mom would understand the dangers of it and get rid of the thing for them. _But what about the punishments?_ Her brain rang out at her. If mom found out it was her causing all that mayhem on the news a few nights ago frightening away loggers, tearing Burns' mansion apart piece by piece then mom will ground her for weeks.

"Mask, what Mask? I don't know anything about a Mask!" her mouth had automatically said quickly while her brain had those thoughts.

The door handle turned and before Lisa could do anything mom entered her room and had taken notice of Lisa's trembling form.

"Lisa, a lot of weird things have been happening recently" mom said as she crossed the room and sat down on the edge of Lisa's bed and fixed her with a stare that she reserved for when she wanted to get something out of her by acting sympathetically. Lisa however remained standing. "The four versions of _Green Face_, the knife in the living room, Bart's recent fear of you, the empty fridge, the port-a-potty in the back yard. All ever since Homer bought that wooden mask for Bart on his birthday, you wouldn't know anything about that would you?"

Looking into her moms concerned eyes just made her tremble all the more. It was too much, all her worries, all those nasty thoughts of prison she was having; it was just too much for someone of her age to handle. And despite her maturity beyond her years, despite her intelligence and despite how pathetic it may look Lisa did the only thing an eight year old girl would do in a situation like this. She began to cry, she ran up to her mom and hugged her tightly and just burst into tears letting it all pour out of her.

"There, there sweetie" mom said softly patting her on the back as she cried into her moms shoulder "Now, why don't you tell me all about it?"

* * *

"I'm starting to lose patience _Green Face_" Wiggum said trying to filter out as much menace as he could from his voice. It wouldn't come across well when this tape was played back in court, but the boy just wouldn't take this seriously and _Green Face_ had humiliated Wiggum on so many occasions that he was starting to lose patience with this boy version.

"Now, now Mr. Wiggum" said Neuman in his low monotone that threatened to put them all to sleep every time he spoke. "Perhaps reinforcing the boys negative attitude with shouts and bullying is not the best of ideas. I suggest we try to connect with the boy, try to understand what goes on inside his head and try to make his inner child more comfortable and possibly more dossal."

While Neuman said this _Green Face_ was sitting behind him and held up a large painted wooden sign on a wooden stick, Wiggum wasn't even going to question where the heck it had come from. There were no words on the wooden sign, just a picture of a spanner and an arrow pointing at Neuman, in other words 'tool'.

Wiggum actually had to fight back a laugh when he saw this, he may have problems with the boy but the little trouble maker wasn't wrong there.

As soon as Neuman finished his sentence, still oblivious to what had just happened behind his back, the green boy quickly put his hands in his pockets and the wooden sign had just vanished into those pockets as soon as Neuman turned to look at him.

"Now then Mr. _Green Face_, do you have a name I can refer to you by?" Neuman asked.

"Yeah I do" _Green Face_ said leaning back on his chair legs again. "My friends call me Weiner, first name Ey'ma"

"Okay, Ey'ma Weiner" both Lou and Wiggum had to fight back the urge to just laugh and still Neuman didn't seem to even get or notice that a joke had just happened but he did turn to look at them curiously before turning back to the boy. "Why don't you tell me about yourself, where do you come from?" the boy shrugged.

"Well..." the boy said rocking slightly on the chairs back legs "I was born in the wagon of a travelling show" the boy said "My mama used to dance for the money they throw. Papa would go whatever he could..." this sounded vaguely familiar to Wiggum "...teach a little gospel, sell a couple bottles of Dr. Good. Gypsies, tramps and thieves, they hear it from the people of the town, they call us gypsies, tramps and thieves."

That was a song by Cher, Wiggum realised. The boy wasn't singing it, just said it as if he was causally talking.

"But every night the men would come around, and lay their money down" the boy finished.

"I... see" Neuman said, Wiggum couldn't tell if he got the joke or not but at least this time he didn't take the statement seriously. "Tell me a little more about you parents, are they kind to you? Do they care for you? Do they abuse you?"

Suddenly _Green Face_ got to his feet and stood on the chair and pushed his face close to Neuman in a threatening manner, and Neuman showing genuine fear shrank away a little.

"You trying to blame my parents for my behaviour?" he said in anger.

"No, no not at all" Neuman said eyes wider then Wiggum had ever seen them as he held up his hands to show he meant no harm.

"My behaviour is my own, don't blame it on my parents, don't blame it on my dad, don't blame it on my mother!..." was that music Wiggum could hear fading in from the tape recorder speaker? "...don't blame it on my sister, don't blame it on the night!..." Suddenly _Green Face_ pulled back away from Neuman, leapt up onto the table, wrapped one leg over the over and sent himself into a spin, when he emerged he was still dressed the same but had just launched himself into another of his song and dance routines.

"Don't blame it on the sunshine

Don't blame it on the moon light

Don't blame it on the good times

Blame it on the boogie!"

_Green Face_ span on his heels just once this time like a dancer before coming to a stop and flipping his feet up and bending himself forward a little so he was balanced on the tips of his shoes like Michael Jackson.

"Don't you blame it on the Sunshine

Don't blame it on the moon light

Don't blame it on the good times..."

The boy dropped down to the desk, made several trademark Michael Jackson moves with his feet, before moonwalking the length of the table.

Blame it on the boogie!"

This was really going to be more difficult then Wiggum predicted and Neuman looked shocked by this eccentric and unusual behaviour, perhaps at last he understood what the police force had been going through these last few weeks.

Completely failing to get any kind of usable statement from the menace Wiggum then changed tact to how long _Green Face_ will spend in prison for his crimes. He even mentioned that they had a hair sample that would place him at the scene of the jewellery store robbery and that all they had to do was collect a sample of _Green Face_'s DNA for comparison, Wiggum also stated they had a warrant for his DNA sample so there was no use trying to say they didn't.

Lou approached him with a cotton swab to take some cells from the inside of his cheek, it had a small plastic container attached to it to avoid DNA contamination.

"What the hell's that for?" the boy said flicking the plastic part with his index finger.

"It's what the cotton swap is kept in to avoid DNA contamination, if DNA is contaminated then the courts won't accept any of the findings" Lou explained as if to an enthusiastic youngster as he bent down closer to take the cell sample.

"Is that so?" the boy said. Wiggum didn't like that look on his face, it looked as if he'd just got an idea.

"Open wide little guy" Lou said, and indeed the boy did open wide, very wide, so wide that you could fit a bed down that mouth. The boy even went 'Ahhhhh' and as he did this and the smell from his mouth was just horrific, like something had crawled down his throat, died, decomposed, came back to life as a zombie and took a dump in his throat.

"That'll do" Lou said in a faint voice that made him sound like he was only half awake, he hadn't made a move to swab the inside of the boys mouth and was starting to lean backwards "Thank...you..." and the police officer fell back on his chair and collapsed to the floor, overcome by that putrid smell from the boys mouth.

As Lou fell _Green Face_ took the cotton swab from Lou's hand and, despite it not being designed for that, started to brush his teeth with it. When he was done the boy tossed it into a waiting trashcan contaminating the evidence.

"Speaking of DNA" _Green Face_ said getting to his feet "you guys have a forensics lab around here, right?"

"Yeah, out the door, turn right, third left, second right" Wiggum then wondered why he'd just answered that question? He was the police chief, he got to ask the questions.

"Thank you" the boy said in a very irritating tone of superiority as he headed for the door, turned the handle and made to leave.

"Hold it right there _Green Face_" Wiggum said drawing his gun from his holster. He took a step forward, or tried to because as he moved his left foot it stopped and refused to go where it was needed for him to maintain balance. He fell forward onto his stomach, an impact which knocked the wind out of him. It took him a few seconds to roll over, look down at his feet and discover that _Green Face_ had somehow removed the hand cuffs from his own hands and attached them to his ankles.

After unlocking the cuffs with a key Wiggum got up and made to go after the mischievous boy. He opened the door which the boy had left ajar and was about to step into the corridor when something whooshed past him so fast he nearly fell backwards again. He couldn't be sure but he was almost certain he saw _Green Face_ sitting in one of those mop buckets janitors used, the type that were on wheels, and he was driving it like a go-kart along the walls up onto the ceiling before heading straight back towards him knocking the cap off his head as the boy raced above him. Heading, Wiggum guessed, towards the forensics lab. The boy then vanished around a corner and Wiggum follow him calling for the aid of any officers along the way.

As Wiggum rounded the last corner to the lab he was stopped by a wall of bubbles and suds which erupted from the corridor leading to the lab. From that wall of bubbles came the bucket-kart in which sat _Green Face_.

"I didn't do it" the boy said unconcerned that no one would believe him as he raced towards the chief of police.

"Reach for the skies!" Wiggum said pointing his revolver ready to shoot though he knew this pea shooter probably wouldn't do anything to the bullet proof boy. But _Green Face_ did reach for the sky, he held up his arms which stretched upwards and grabbed an overhanging pipe and he quickly lifted himself out of the bucket up towards the ceiling as the bucket careered into Wiggum's legs and sweeping them out from under himself causing him to summersault in the air twice before landing roughly on his backside.

_Green Face_ then let go of the pipe and dropped towards the floor and landed on a pogo stick, Wiggum was getting to the point of taking all this weirdness in his stride now as the boy bounced up over the police chiefs head and bounced the rest of the way down the corridor on his new found transport.

Then from the bubbling foam wall came several of the forensic scientists coughing bubbles and gasping for air before finally collapsing to the floor unconscious. The boy had ruined the lab, shame because that lab was just one day away from retirement.

As Wiggum got to his feet he was joined by Ed and several other officers who had obviously heard the disturbance, they were followed moments later by Lou who still looked a little dazed.

"He's heading for the car park, Chief!" Lou said "Let's go!" but Wiggum held out his arm to stop the officers moving down the corridor.

"Lou" Wiggum said "who's the Chief of Police here?"

After a brief argument the police officers arrived in the parking bay. Most of the bays were empty because most squad cars were out on their night shifts but one or two of them were still in their bays. Was _Green Face_ attempting to steal a squad car?

The car park was eerily quiet as the dozens of police officers filed inside. The boy could be anywhere, literally anywhere, behind one of the columns, under one of the cars, in the cars, in the vent system, under the road, maybe he was the road for all Wiggum knew.

Off into the distance Wiggum could see a shadow being cast from behind one of the support pillars holding the ceiling up. He was there, just behind it the small form of the menace sprouting the thick, spiky hair. The Chief clicked his fingers to attract the attention of the other officers and pointed at the shadowy area where no doubt the boy was.

"Okay _Green Face_, I'm gonna count to three, then I want you to come out" he warned sternly "One…" he looked around the silent shadowy parking bay as he approached, he was expecting _Green Face_ to have made a move by now "Two…" Wiggum's finger tightened on the trigger, ready to fire off a shot. "Three!"

He rounded the corner and pointed his gun at… it was just a mop and bucket, the mop head was casting a shadow similar to _Green Face_'s head.

"Oh, it's just a mop and bucket" Wiggum sighed.

"Correct…" said that child like voice "…and the next object?" it said like a parent encouraging a baby to correctly name something.

When Wiggum heard this voice he fired off a shot in panic, the bullet passed straight through the head of the mop. _Oh no! That poor innocent mop _Wiggum thought sadly _some days you just don't want to be a cop, you know._ The mop suddenly fell over revealing the figure standing behind it, the shape of the mop head had completely and perfectly eclipsed the form of _Green Face _who stood there with a hole in his forehead, a hole that went straight through to the back of his head.

"Oooo, that is gonna hurt tomorrow!" the boy said his eyes swirling to look up at his forehead.

Wiggum didn't show any surprise that the boy wasn't dead, the _Green Face_ had been ran over, shot at, crushed, blown up and so on and still hadn't died. Wiggum just pointed his revolver at the boy and a moment later he was joined in the gun pointing by the other police officers in the parking lot, but the boy just smiled.

"Hey, I've just come up with a new game to play" and in a flash he had zoomed straight past the police officers before they could squeeze off a single shot, that wouldn't have done much good anyway.

Was _Green Face_ trying to escape again? The answer to that question was no, because he had come to a stop and was just standing there, in the middle of the vast space holding himself as if he was in a trance with his head down.

The boys clothes had changed, he now wore a black shirt with dark jeans and a leather jacket and leather boots but what was most noticeable about the clothes was the presence of many shiny, silver buckles which clanged together whenever he made even a little movement.

"Okay _Green Face_" Wiggum said raising his revolver "Get your hands up, and no funny business" and the boy did raise his hands above his head, the buckles making a jingling noise as they rose, but when they were stretched out as far as they would go the boy sent himself into that whacky spin like tornado again.

Wiggum readied himself to fire when the tornado split into two, both of which twirled around each other before further splitting into two, creating two small and two large tornados, and an even smaller one broke off from one of the larger ones. Then suddenly they all came to a stop revealing five people of different ages and genders, all with big green heads and comically large teeth. Wiggum recognized four of them as the four versions of _Green Face_, adult male, with the fat gut and plastic hair, the boy with the crazy jester hat like hair style, the girl with the spiky blond hair and crazy look in her eye, the woman with the long flowing blue hair and eyes that could melt a man's heart -if the rest of the face wasn't so freaky-. But Wiggum had never seen the baby with the big balled green head which sucked menacingly on a pacifier. Somehow _Green Face_ had split himself into five different versions of himself, that's all they needed right now, five of them!

It got worse though because a lot more green headed figures suddenly jumped out from behind the tall pillars around the five and some even dropped from the ceiling seemingly from nowhere. All had big green heads, all had big teeth, some had larger eyes than usual, none had ears and most were balled. What the hell was this, a family reunion? One of them, a tall man with a big green balled head dressed in a bright yellow suit and yellow wide brimmed hat with a long feather in it suddenly wiggled his teeth making an odd yammering noise.

Wiggum and the cops held their ground despite how much they wanted to run. They were now face to face with more _Green Face_s then they'd ever imagined. Where the hell had they all come from?

For a few moments the cops and the _Green Face_s just stared at each other across a small void between them. Wiggums mouth became dry and his brow began to sweat, is fingers trembled on the trigger of his revolver, waiting for the first move.

The boy who appeared to be the leader of this gang, crossed his arms over his chest and continued to stare at them creepily smiling with those large, white teeth.

Suddenly the boy made a move, so fast it produced the sound of a whip cracking, but it wasn't a threatening move. The boy had flung a clenched fist into the air and as if it was a signal music started pouring out from the walls around them, and the static figures began to move, move in sync with the boy in front who, Wiggum had just realized, was dressed in a Michael Jackson costume and the music was from one of his songs. Wiggum wasn't a big fan of Michael Jackson so he honestly couldn't remember what the name of the track was, but that didn't stop the dozens of _Green Face_s dancing to it.

The moves they were making were way too complicated for Wiggum to even describe but when the boy flung his hand up in the air again he began to sing in an odd voice that Wiggum knew wasn't even his but sounded like it was really coming from his mouth.

"Your Butt Is Mine  
Gonna Take You Right  
Just Show Your Face  
In Broad Daylight  
I'm Telling You  
On How I Feel  
Gonna Hurt Your Mind  
Don't Shoot To Kill  
Come On, Come On,  
Lay It On Me All Right..."

All the _Green Face_s suddenly turned to face away from them and craned their necks and shoulders in such a way that it produced a loud clicking noise before spinning around and they started running across the car part towards a wall with an air vent set into it.

"Well They Say The Sky's  
The Limit  
And To Me That's Really True  
But My Friend You Have  
Seen Nothing  
Just Wait 'Til I Get Through . . ."

When they reached the vent the boy reached out and pulled the cover off. Amazingly a large gust blasted from the open vent causing the boys pointy hair to sweep back as he continued to sing.

"Because I'm Bad, I'm Bad-  
Come On  
'Bad Bad-Really, Really Bad'

You know I'm bad, I'm bad

'Really really bad'  
And The Whole World Has To  
Answer Right Now  
Just To Tell You Once Again,  
Who's Bad . . ."

The vent had gradually stopped blowing while _Green Face_ sang at it pretending to be Michael Jackson. What's with all the singing and dancing from these guys anyway? Wiggum wondered.

They stopped dancing for a moment and slowly turned back to face away from the vent before spinning back around again to face the vent quickly and wiping their faces with the back of their hands.

Then they all turned around again ran back a little ways and began to dance again matching moves perfectly to the music video that Wiggum now realized was the song 'Bad', it was so obvious because it was in the title.

"You Know I'm Smooth, I'm  
Bad, You Know It  
'Bad Bad-Really, Really Bad'  
You Know I'm Bad, I'm

Bad Baby

'Bad Bad-Really, Really Bad'  
You Know, You Know, You  
Know It, Come On  
'Bad Bad-Really, Really Bad'

"And The Whole World Has To  
Answer Right Now"  
"Woo!"

The troop broke up and started dancing all over the parking lot, all the officers didn't know who to keep their guns trained on. The boy, the baby, the girls, the adults, the dogs… dogs?

Meanwhile the main _Green Face_, the boy was singing and dancing in the middle of the lot while a bunch were skipping in an eccentric way towards him before spinning around and around like dancers while still moving forwards. Then the boy did a double twirl without becoming the tornado and came to a rapid stop. There was a loud crunching noise and the boys jaw dropped open as if holding back a howl of pain and his eyes inflated in shock as his hands raced down towards his groin having apparently crushed it in that spin.

While the boy fell to the floor the rest of the troop kept dancing, but then the boy swung himself back up again apparently un-phased as if that was something he'd meant to do anyway.

"Just To Tell You Once Again  
You Know I'm Bad, I'm Bad-  
You Know It  
'Bad Bad-Really, Really Bad'

You Know I'm Bad-You  
Know-Hoo!"

Wiggum hand honestly given up trying to describe what was going on anymore, the dancing was utter chaos, some were moonwalking one way, others spinning in another, it was just too complicated to put into words so instead he focused on the boy who was obviously in charge. He was currently doing a strange movement with his legs that gave the illusion he was walking forwards while being stationary, like the moonwalk only he wasn't even moving backwards.

Now the troop had reassembled and were advancing towards Wiggum and the group of cops next to him. The police chief hadn't dared fire a shot or try to interfere because none of them had no idea what to do because for some reason the police manual didn't include arresting a large dancing crowd of super powered lunatics in their procedures, fools! They didn't need police officers they needed the National Guard!

"'Bad Bad-Really, Really Bad'

You Know I'm Bad-I'm Bad-  
You Know It, You Know  
'Bad Bad-Really, Really Bad'

And The Whole World Has To  
Answer Right Now  
Just To Tell You Once Again . . .  
Who's Bad?"

The song finally over all the _Green Face_s frozen in a specific pose, with the boy at the head of the group holding up his fist towards them and staring intently at them as if they were a threat.

Silence again as the band of cops continued to aim their guns at the dozens of _Green Face_s. Wiggum could hear the rattle of many guns because like him they were all trembling with fear.

Then in a blink of an eye and with a whoosh of motion they were gone, all of them, gone every _Green Face_ gone except for the boy who just stood there innocently as if nothing peculiar had happened at all.

"Well it was fun playing with you, but sorry I gotta split!" and _Green Face_ ran, but in which direction Wiggum couldn't tell because it looked like the boy had divided again into four clones of himself that ran in completely opposite directions.

Wiggum and the other officers spent hours scouring the parking lot for the elusive boy, but no luck. _Green Face_ had escaped again.

* * *

Bart laughed like a drain for hours after that as he continued to cause mayhem all over the town. First he'd gone to Luigi's and planted 101 rats in the soup while the owner was describing how all his food was made with only the 'most quality of ingredients', he had said this before lifting the lid on a pizza with rats heads all over it.

Then the masked Bart had then gone to the power plant and freaked out the night staff there by crawling out of a toxic waste barrel glowing bright green with bulging muscles and a really distant look in his eyes which he added for effect. He'd moaned and groaned as he held out his hands and slowly walked like a zombie saying "Must... destroy... mankind!"

He even had fun with some of the road signs all over the town. One he rewrote to say 'Amarillo, this way!' to help Tony Christie find his way, hey he kept asking! Another he wrote said 'Springfield, twinned with hell' and another he rewrote to say 'Help, I'm trapped in a sign making factory!' One road sign he found read 'Park and ride 200 yards' above which he wrote 'Want a hooker?' Bart didn't really understand what he had just written, only that he thought it was funny.

Then as he slowly walked towards his next destination, the bully Nelson's house Bart got the shock of his life when something smacked into him at high speed plastering his form to the front of a speeding vehicle.

Inside the large black car sat four men, three dressed in smart suits and the fourth was a fat person in an orange prison jumpsuit, he didn't manage to get a good look at them though in the darkness.

"Hey, the bugs in this town just keep getting bigger and bigger." A skinny man behind the wheel said in the accent of an Italian mobster as he flipped a stalk on the wheel housing causing the windscreen wipers to start up, pushing at Bart's face distorting it even further. Bart just let his form melt, literally melt away and he seeped under the hood where, through some mystical powers of the Mask, he managed to make the car come to a screeching halt and stall.

"Oh no, come on start, start!" the man behind the wheel said in panic turning the key again and again only to hear a choking engine, the car just refused to start because Bart wouldn't allow it to happen.

"I am not pleased with this current turn of events" said a man in a cool, husky voice who was obviously the leader of this gang. "I did not plan for weeks to get broken out of prison only to get recaptured due to the low quality of American getaway cars."

"Whoa, whoa, boss, maybe I can fix it real fast!" the skinny man opened the car door and jumped out.

"You'd better, or you'll be joining the skunk in the trunk" and from the trunk Bart could hear a loud muffling, struggling noise, these were real gangsters, possibly the Springfield Itallian mafia, COOL!

The skinny man popped the hood, and his eyes widened in amazement because Bart had made the entire engine vanish, you couldn't see anything mechanical on the inside at all. All that was there was Bart holding onto a steel bar which ran from one side of the car to the other and he panted and coughed heavily as if he had run a mile pushing the car along.

"How does Fred Flintstone do this?" Bart said letting his tongue hang out as he panted.

"What? Where..." the man was clearly lost for words and stared in amazement "How did you get here?" he asked, to which the boy just smiled broadly and said. "You'll have to ask my parents, they wouldn't tell me."

Then the boy leapt from the car's engine housing and landed on the grill at the front. Bart recognised this goon as one of Fat Tony's henchmen, a large crime family of the Italian mafia and Bart intended to have a little fun with them. But the moment he leapt into the air to land on the grill he was almost blinded by something off in the distance, and it burnt him, burnt him badly.

Just on the horizon the yellow disk of the sun was slowly creeping into the sky and as it got higher and higher Bart started to feel progressively worse as if he was badly ill. His stomach turned and his face felt like it had bad sunburn on it. He began to reach up to feel his face when it suddenly dropped and drooped down into his hands, which were at the moment down by his stomach. What was happening?

Behind him the engine he'd just made vanish was slowly starting to shimmer back into existence, where it had been before.

Quickly Bart clumsily dropped to the ground and ran for his life into a nearby dark back alley out of sight while he worked out what was going on here.

The tall man looked on in bemusement for a while considering if he should chase after the boy, but his thoughts were interrupted by the sound of police sirens. He slammed the hood down, climbed back into the car which started no problem and was driving off a few moments before a large collection of police squad cars raced past chasing after them their sirens and lights blazing and Bart remained in the shadows feeling more and more fatigued and sick.

He swayed in the ally unable to keep his balance. He opened his eyes and spotted a small fragment of a broken mirror leaning up against the wall. It was small but from it he could see his reflection perfectly.

His face, it looked like it was melting and crusting over at the same time. He reached up and felt the soft rubber start to harden into wood and as he watched his long black hair started to recede back into his head and turn blond again, his clothes began to fade back into his usual blue shorts and red shirt and the green Mask started peeling off from his face.

Why was it doing this? He didn't want to lose these powers he was enjoying himself too much. But he apparently didn't have a choice as he felt the power drain from him like the sewage in the school septic tank after he drilled a few holes in it last week. A whirl wind kicked up around him and after a loud snap followed by an anti climatic hiss the de-transformation was over and Bart was back to his normal self, and no matter how hard he pressed the Mask onto his face it wasn't taking effect again.

"Ah man!" he moaned removing the wooden thing from his face and immediately felt weak as if the Mask had left a void inside him, an empty shell that was completely drained.

Coming to his senses he tucked the Mask under his arm and slowly began walking back home.

It took him about an hour on foot to walk home, much longer then it would've taken to drive by car but then again he guessed that must be what parents were for anyway.

He arrived back home and approached the front door of the family house but suddenly realised it wouldn't be open this early, no one would be up and anyway it would look suspicious if he did enter through the front door. Especially if mom was up already, she usually was at the crack of dawn. So instead he snuck around the back of the house, climbed into his tree house and walk along the branches towards his bedroom window before climbing through it, which he always left unlatched in case of such emergencies like these.

He closed the window behind him and glanced down at the Mask in his hand. He was annoyed at it, why had it stopped working? He wanted to throw it into the garbage in frustration, or try to flush it down the toilet, but as he considered that it might start working again he realised he'd be mad to throw it away, not something so powerful and so much fun, but why had it stopped working?

"It only works at night, Bart" said Lisa who'd managed to open his bedroom door without him noticing. He didn't like that superior tone of hers, one she reserved for when she had an ace up her sleeve.

"and you didn't think to inform me earlier?" Bart said in annoyance, clearly back to his old self after that psycho standing on the threshold of his bedroom nearly killed him a few nights ago. "And I did what you asked, I got rid of that gold and the jewellery and destroyed that police hair thingy."

"You also destroyed the forensics lab" Lisa said with disapproval. "Yeah, it's been all over the news how '_Green Face'_ escaped police custardy and not only stopped the forensic tests to identify him, but also ruined several case trials that were due to put several dangerous criminals behind bars."

"Hey, you said if I got rid of that stuff you'd let me do what I wanted, and I can keep the Mask" Bart said clutching the thing tightly in his hands in case Lisa tried to make a grab for it.

"Only 'I' said you could keep it" Lisa said as another figure entered the room, taller than Lisa with much taller hair. It was mom, what was she doing here? She looked at Bart with a look of half annoyance, half concerned, her eyes then glanced momentarily towards the mask in his hands before looking back into his eyes again. The look on her face told Bart everything he needed to know immediately.

Lisa had broken the golden rule of being a kid, 'don't squeal.'

* * *

**To be continued...**

* * *

**Author's notes:** Which Mask persona was the best? Cast your vote on the poll on my profile page and tell me which Mask persona you thought was the best.

I was in two minds about letting Bart dance to Bad, because I thought 'there's been too much singing and dancing in this story already' but in the end I put it in. But I've promised myself this will be the last one in the story.

'Bad' and 'Blame it on the Boogie', were both songs sung by Michael Jackson, no copyright infringement was intended and the lyrics were just used in humour. Also, R.I.P. Michael Jackson.

The other _Green Face_s that appeared during the Bad dance are all previous people to have worn the Mask from the Simpson family all the way back to Stanley Ipkiss. I like to think the Mask retains a little of the creature it transforms a person into which is why Bart was able to project the other Masks. So those of you who have written your own 'unique Mask' fan fictions can imagine your own versions of the Mask in there as well if you like ;)

I've never read any Daniel Steel but my girlfriend did describe the books as 'dreary rubbish', plus there is an episode which Lisa mentions not liking them somewhere, don't know which episode though.

The road sign gags are actually from an episode of the comedy panel show, 'Mock the Week'

-Hope you all enjoyed the new chapter.


	22. The Deal of Fates

**Chapter 21**

**The Deal of Fates**

The Mask sat in the middle of the kitchen table as the whole Simpson family sat around it. Bart looked like a child who'd had his favourite toy taken away from him. Mom had a look of concern on her face. Maggie just looked on curiously in her high chair having no idea what was going on around her. Dad was just indifferent until he remembered what the thing allowed him to do, only then did he look on it like it was his gateway to gluttony bliss. Lisa however was just glad to get the secret of the Mask off her chest but still looked on the wooden thing with loathing and contempt. That thing had caused this family so much trouble.

Mom had asked for the whole story, what had happened from the beginning, ago Lisa explained about the mysterious appearance of _Green Face_ three weeks ago the night before dad presented Bart with the Mask. How the Mask had fallen into the hands of each of the Simpson family members and what it turned them into. Lisa was almost on the point crying again when she was forced to remembered what the Mask made her do while under its influence. She went on to describe how on the night mom and dad went out to that 'fake party' Sideshow Bob had broken into the house in an attempt to kill both Bart and herself and how both Maggie and Lisa had sent the clown flying away into the night with the powers the Mask imbued its wearer with.

Marge was satisfied with this explanation because it put to rest her fears that Bart was playing with knifes, based on that sharp carving knife she'd found stuck in the living room wall, which was obviously Bobs from that night.

Lisa went into explanation how she tried to destroy the Mask and how it stubbornly refused to break, crack or even suffer a scratch before trying to burn it in the fire place. This then lead to mom's explanation of how she got the Mask and how under its influence stole from the jewellery shop and wrecked a video store. Lisa then explained how she got the Mask back and then enlisted Bart's help to use the Mask to get rid of the stolen stuff and stop forensic tests that would identify _Green Face_ as a member of the Simpson family.

When she'd finished her explanation the family sat in silence for a moment as this sank in. Lisa couldn't imagine what must be running through their heads –actually she could tell what was running through Bart's head easily- Lisa had tried to get across that way lay in the middle of the table was probably the single most dangerous thing on the planet. Suddenly dad broke the silence.

"You mean this thing makes your dreams come true?" dad said excitedly obviously missing the point. Lisa was about to correct him when he cheered, flinging his arms up into the air and getting up out of his seat bellowing 'WOOH HOOO!' before scooping up the Mask in his chubby fingers "All my life I dreamed of being a human garbage disposal and now I can be!" and dad placed the Mask on his face and held it on with his hands, he flinched.

He chuckled like a maniac as he danced around the table spinning clumsily from foot to foot as he did and failed to notice that the Mask wasn't taking effect, and wouldn't while it was currently daytime.

"Homer, it's not..." Mom tried to say but dad cut her off.

"Can't here you Marge, I'm transforming" Homer said as he chuckled manically while spinning around.

"Oh, at last I can eat anything and everything I've always wanted! I won't get full and I won't ever die because I'm wearing the Ma... D'OH!" he screamed when he dizzily spun into the wall and collapsed to the floor on his back, the Mask clattering beside him. He muttered something in a daze under his breath that end in "... wearing the Mask."

The moment the Mask landed on the floor Bart had leapt off his chair and made a dash for it, but Lisa had slipped off her chair and managed to snatch it away before Bart could reach it because she was nearer to it. She held it out of arms reach from him above her own head as Bart tried to wrestle her to the ground for it. But mom plucked the wooden thing from Lisa's hands before Bart could grab it.

"Mom!" Bart whaled.

"Bart, that thing is too dangerous for any of us to wear again" Lisa insisted.

"You're a loon when you wear it!" Bart shot back "and you said I could have it!"

"Well, I say you can't" mom said placing the Mask back in the middle of the table, "we're having a family meeting here, now everyone back in there places and no Mask wearing!"

The Simpsons gathered around the table again each one looking at the Mask with different expressions again. Mom was the first to pipe up with a moan. "Is there no way to put this thing's powers to good use?"

"No, there isn't" Lisa insisted "It doesn't bring dreams to life" she glanced at dad to get the point across "It brings only your inner most desires to life, no matter how dark or deranged they may be."

"You mean like how you tried to feed me to lions?" Bart yelled almost accusingly.

"Exactly" Lisa said starting to lose her patience with her stupid brother "the mind has layers that stop these darker thoughts manifesting themselves into actions. The Mask overrides those layers." Lisa turned to mom "Mom, would you have robbed the jewellery store if you weren't wearing the Mask?" mom of course said no. "Do you think Maggie would've tried to eat the entire contents of the fridge if she wasn't wearing it?" Maggie of course remained silent. "Bart, would you have torn the Police Station apart if you weren't wearing the Mask?" but before he could answer Lisa said with contempt "actually don't bother answering that." She turned to dad "and Dad... what did you do that night anyway?"

"Yeah, well while we're on the subject of yelling at each other!" dad yelled pointing an accusing finger at Lisa "Your stunt with the loggers put a load of regular joes out of work, and you made my boss angry! He was so P. he restocked the vending machines with health food! Way to go, way to ruin lives!"

"Dad, I couldn't control myself!" Lisa insisted. "No one can wearing that thing!"

"I gave the same defence when I was caught drink driving, it didn't help!" dad yelled back.

"You were drink driving?" mom ask suspiciously.

"Ay caramba, will you guys stop being lame!" Bart said leaning forward in his seat "that Mask gives me unlimited power. I can do anything and everything I've always wanted. So what if 'Lame-azoid' Lisa can't control herself, it doesn't mean I can't!"

"You should talk, Bart!" Lisa said "I wanted you to stop forensic tests on moms hair not destroy the lab, do you know how many criminals have been turned loose due to lack of forensic evidence?"

"Details, details!" Bart waved his hand as if to swipe the question away. "You just said stop the tests, you didn't tell me how."

"This Mask is obviously a bad influence on you kids" Marge said as she reached down and picked the Mask up and held it out of everyone's reach. "It's worse than that Grand Theft Scratchy game, so I'm going to put it somewhere were none of you can get your hands on it!"

"MOM!" Bart moaned. But she didn't listen as she quickly started walking away carrying the Mask in her hand. She turned when Bart tried to follow her.

"You stay here!" Marge insisted pointing back at Bart's empty chair for him to sit down again, and pouting Bart did as he was told.

Lisa looked satisfied with the outcome of this family meeting and looked smug, so Bart stuck his tongue out at her. But Lisa didn't care, the Mask was finally gone, mom would make sure of that and the family can finally get back to normal.

* * *

Ah! The smell of a pure, fresh Cuban cigar. He'd been waiting for one of these for months, ever since he was sent to prison. He ran it under his large nose smelling the sweet tobacco before placing it in his mouth and lighting it up. Fat Tony took two great puffs on the cigar and slowly blew out a cloud of thick smoke. It was good to be back on the outside again.

He sat at a small round table in a dimly lit room, the area he was in illuminated by a single light dangling from the ceiling on a wire. HIs henchmen sat around the same table on other chairs.

"I must congratulate you all on a job well done" Fat Tony said in a deep Italian voice as he took another puff on his cigar "I assume you took care of all the loose ends?" he said tapping his cigar so a small clump of ash fell away into the ash tray.

"Y-y-y-y yeah boss" said Louie, a tall skinny man with dark curly hair "we tied up that loose end and dumped him in the river." Fat Tony took another great puff on his cigar.

"Excellent work, and with _Green Face_ causing havoc at the police station it is unlikely they will ever catch me again so soon."

A loud mumbling came from the shadows as one of Tony's trusted cronies dumped a large, brown sack against a large packing crate. It writhed and wriggled as its contents struggled for release.

"I mean to ask Louie" Fat Tony said taking on a slightly curious yet cool tone "Who was that skunk in the trunk back there?"

"Ahh, just some clown we found trying to steal our car a couple of nights ago after we dumped the first... 'problem'"

"Untie him" Fat Tony said as he blew out more smoke up towards the small light bulb dangling overhead. Louie did as instructed and went up to the sack and undid the string around the top and a figure erected himself out of the sack. He had long, bushy hair, a long thin face with a half fearful half murderous look to his eye. He had a rag stuck into his mouth with a gag over that to keep him quiet. Fat Tony recognised this character immediately as Sideshow Bob, the criminal who escaped the prison 3 weeks prior to his own escape.

"Ah, Sideshow Bob" Fat Tony said letting more ash fall from his cigar into the ash tray "remove the gag" he commanded of Louie.

"Why thank you" Bob said as the gag left is mouth and he spat out the rag. All murderous rage appeared to just ebb away but Fat Tony knew all too well that the most murderous can hide their true feelings behind barriers such as charm or cool intellect.

"Please sit" Fat Tony said more of a command then a request when Louie untied his bonds "I must apologise for the way you have been treated Mr. Terwilliger, as you can see my boys can get a little..." he rolled the hand holding the cigar in mid air as he searched for the right word "...'enthusiastic' about their work."

"'Enthusiastic' being tying me up and use me as a punch bag?" Bob said as he sat down opposite Fat Tony and held his left arm which obviously ached. Bob leaned closer and fixed Fat Tony with a look that showed he wouldn't be pushed around. Fat Tony liked that.

"As I said, 'enthusiastic', and you did after all try to steal one of 'my' cars" Fat Tony said fixing the former clown assistant with an equally intense stare. This would-be-murderer had failed several times to kill a little ten year old boy and twice he failed to kill the boys entire family. But there was one crime he was 'almost' successful with, and as that thought crossed Tony's mind a plan started to form in his brain and he smiled a little darkly. "For that I would normally fit a man with concrete shoes and make him sleep with the fishes, but you're lucky you caught me in a good mood today because I intend to grant you a full pardon from such a fate."

"Oh, okay" Bob said with a look like this had been an unexpected outcome, but then fixed him with a look that was both quizzical and accusing "What's the catch?"

"Oh, no catch" Fat Tony said in just the right way to mean 'there is a catch, but there is no catch if you know what I mean' "Only you have to do me a favour in return."

"What kind of 'favour' are we talking about here?" Bob asked.

"Whoa, Boss" it was Louie again who came to stand next to him. Fat Tony did not turn to acknowledge him "This guy failed to murder a ten year old boy dozens of times, I don't think it's a good idea for him to be doing favours for us."

"Then it is a good job you don't do any of the thinking around here." The mafia boss shot back without even glancing at Louie before turning his full attention back to Sideshow Bob.

"I want you to do one thing for me Robert, just one thing and we can call ourselves even" he said as he took another great puff on his cigar. "I want you to use that educated brain of yours to rig the mayoral election, again"

* * *

What mom never seemed to realise is that Bart Simpson does not give up so easily. He spent hours looking for the Mask after mom walked away with it, and so far he's not been having any luck. The first placed he checked was in her purse when she wasn't looking, but it wasn't there. He tried the trash, but after getting dirty he decided it wasn't in there either. He even went into mom's room and looked under the bed, in the bed, in the cupboard, in the joining bathroom, through their draws but the only thing Bart managed to find was a pair of dad's special underpants that were specially made in Taiwan and were seven times the largest pair he'd ever seen.

When that didn't work he decided to try a different method by using Santa's Little Helper as a sniffer dog. He put him on the leash and the dog bounced around excitedly thinking Bart was going to take him for a walk. Bart showed him a crude drawing of the Mask because for some reason in his mind he thought this would be enough for the dog to find it. Santa's Little Helper sniffed at it once then bounced away dragging Bart along, out the front door and a little ways down the street where he stopped to sniff at a lamppost.

"Come on!" Bart commanded of his dog, pulling at the leash to break him away but Santa's Little Helper wouldn't budge until he'd finished his 'business'. After a little while the dog had lead him to the park and into the kids sand pit where, to Bart's disappointment, the dog dug up an old lump of dog poo someone had buried in there.

Returning home a little deflated but not defeated he checked Lisa's room again, especially that little space under the floor boards he now knew about, but all he found was just a few old letters and a diary full of girlish dribble.

Where the heck could mom have put it? It was maddening, the coolest thing he'd ever owned in his life and he lost it just as quickly as he got it just because loony Lisa couldn't control herself. Who was she kidding with that story of hers? She was just jealous that she couldn't control the Mask's powers like he could. He could make the power do whatever he wanted and didn't go completely gaga over it like Lisa did. But now it seemed it was over just as it was getting good. Mom had just hid the Mask too well.

Sighing Bart picked up Lisa's diary from the table and opened it up. It might give him a clue where to look for the Mask but he doubted it. He really just wanted to cheering up a little and reading how Lisa's freakishly nerdish life was so unlike his own was just the right thing to cheer him up.

He flipped through the pages until he found the last entry which was just yesterday morning and Bart started to read.

'Dear Diary

'Oh, why do such unfortunate circumstances cruelly conspire against me?

'I woke up this morning to find a truly terrible sight. I heard a mysterious, almost inhuman noise coming from mom and dad's room and when I opened the door I found mom, intoxicated from a night sampling the darker side of Springfield culture, with her head down the toilet looking deadly white. But that's not the terrible sight I beheld. On the bed I found that bane on the Simpson family, the thing I thought was destroyed and cast to ashes. The Mask was still in one piece. The same mask I had been desperate to destroy the night before, the one I failed to break, smash and rip apart, the one that failed to burn in the fire last night. What will it take to end my torment and banish this curse from our lives?

'I can feel it in my mind, laughing at me, my ID, the darker part of me the Mask unleashes. It was laughing at me, taunting me to put it on again. This stupid Mask has caused way too much trouble in our lives and it's far too dangerous for anyone to own, less it brings out the ugly side of anyone's personality, the selfish sides, the moral-less sides.

Unable to destroy it I decided to hide it under my computer again so at least no one will ever wear it in my life time.'

The colour of the ink used on the paper then changed from black to blue. What was written next must've been written later on.

'I can still feel it, the other version of me, scratching away from inside my own head, fighting for freedom but as long as I don't wear the Mask ever again I'll be safe, I'll be Lisa Simpson again.

'Though I got rid of the curse for good I still feel terrible. Letting that creature loose makes me feel like I've shredded my soul. It made me do things I didn't want to do, I injured and hurt countless people, I endangered animals and twisted them to my –or it's- will, but the one thing I don't think I will able to forgive myself is what I did to Bart.

'Oh what monster lies beneath the surface of us all. I attacked Bart, I injured him and I practically tortured him the night before. I had fought long and hard to stop a number of the more gruesome things I felt 'my other self' wanted to do to him, things that would've seriously injured him, maybe even killed him. But I had little control, I had nothing holding me back, the mental barriers that stopped it weren't there.

'I tried explaining this to Bart earlier this morning but he's too afraid to even listen to me anymore. I don't expect him to understand how the Mask works, how it stops the mental processes that govern your behaviour, that it disables the Ego and Superego that manage the ID's thoughts. I don't expect him to understand because he is almost pure ID anyway because he chooses not to control himself in real life in the first place. How can I explain that the Mask only gives you the illusion of control when it's only a matter of time before it tries to drive you to do something truly against your nature? How can I explain to Bart that while wearing the Mask you have no choice whatsoever in what you do, that you do whatever your ID tells you to, whether you want to or not.

'I just want to be able to speak to Bart, to make him understand, to apologise properly. Tell him that the monster is gone and the Mask, but he just won't listen. What if I've mentally scared him for life? What if he's going to run in terror of me every time he sees me? I don't think I'll be able to live with myself if that is the case.

This page was covered in small blotches were the ink had been soaked by small droplets of water that Bart guessed where his sisters tears.

'Bart I'm truly sorry...'

Bart flipped through the diary to see if anything else was written in it, but there wasn't.

Slowly he closed the diary and put it down on the bed gently. Reading that, reading his sisters diary, it was like reading her personal thoughts and most of them were laughable, but this time it hadn't been as entertaining as he thought it would. It stirred something deep inside him, something he couldn't explain properly. There was a word for it, was it 'guilt' or 'pity'?

He'd assumed she was just a crazed and insane psychopath who abused the Mask's powers to get revenge on him and anyone who upset her. True he did the same thing but he never went as far as to nearly kill someone, just a little humiliation. But it now occurred to Bart what he was reading wasn't any 'lovey dovey' girl talk nor was it fuming anger or hatred towards her brother, nor was it her usual girlish guilt that he enjoyed laughing at. This chapter made him realise how tortured his sister's soul actually was from wearing the Mask, it was the first thing he'd ever read in her diary that really made sense to him, that really hit him over the head and made him understand what Lisa was feeling. She wasn't jealous of him at all, she really did truly hate that mask.

Quietly he put everything back where he found it and moved the desk and everything back into place before he left the room as he'd found it.

Maybe Lisa was right, maybe the Mask was dangerous. If it brought out that monster from her what would it eventually do to him? He didn't want to kill anyone, he couldn't even stand the time he shot and killed a bird so what would he feel if he killed a person? Wherever mom had hid the Mask maybe it was better that it stayed buried there to never be found.

But as that thought left his head he heard something, a faint banging noise, a noise that didn't seem to come from any particular direction, a sound he didn't hear through his ears exactly, it was in his mind and as he listened more carefully he could make out that the banging wasn't banging at all. It was a drumming, a regular drum beat, the sound of war drums.

All thoughts about what he was just thinking vanished as he gazed upwards at the ceiling where a small hatch leading into the attic was clearly visible in the ceiling and dangling from it was the cord to pull it down.

Quickly Bart raced into his room and picked up a chair and placed it in the middle of the corridor. He stood on top of it and tried to reach up to the dangling string above him. It was just out of his reach, he jumped but he still wasn't able to grab the wire and as he landed the chair it wobbled worryingly under his weight. He jumped again, still he missed and the chair wobbled as he landed on it again. He bent his legs down as far as he could go, took a deep breath and with a giant leap he grasped the cord and with his weight on it the hatch swung open.

He dropped much rapidly then he thought as he landed on the chair which tipped over under the impact causing him to fall on top of it in a heap. But his efforts had paid off as the hatch swung down and a long ladder extended down to the floor with a bang.

He waited for a second expecting mom to shout up asking what on earth was going on, but she didn't. The drumming, though in his mind, clearly came from somewhere up the ladder in the dark attic.

Disentangling himself from his chair he climbed the ladder and entered the musty attic, felt for the light switch and pulled on the cord that switched on the attic light. A large space that looked like the room that time forgot. In it was a collection of junk the Simpsons family had collected over their many wacky adventures all contained in thousands of cardboard boxes that in his mind made him think of the warehouse at the end of 'Raiders of the Lost Ark'.

The drumming was even clearer now then it had been before and he could hear what sounded like stamping and shouts and battle cries and horns. For some reason he instinctively knew this noise to be of a battle of some sort, a Viking battle.

He approached the noises 'source'. He couldn't hear it exactly or see it but he somehow knew it was over here somewhere in this mountain of cardboard boxes. Each box was labelled differently with a thick felt tip pen. One read 'Homer's unsold autobiography', another said 'Family photos' 'Bart's baby things' 'Lisa's baby things' 'Homer's baby things' and so on. Up at the top though was a box Bart could sense the noise was coming from. It was unlabelled so he didn't know what was in it but he felt mysteriously drawn towards it.

Carefully balancing himself on top of two stacked boxes he reached out and picked up the box in his hand and tried to lift it off. It was very heavy and so he pulled hard on it. But this caused it to slide back towards him so quickly and with such force he was unprepared for it. It knocked him to the floor landing on his back with the heavy cardboard box landing dully on his belly.

Bart felt his stomach knowing it was going to leave a bruise there tomorrow but his thoughts of pain were distracted by the drumming and the battle cries which made him continue what he was doing. He opened folding sides of the box and the drumming was so loud it was almost crying out at him as he removed the lid and could now clearly see what was inside.

He pulled out a small wooden box only so big and was square. On its front was a strange pattern showing a jungle with pictures of animals in each corner of the box and printed over it in long silver letters was the word 'Jumanji'.

Shrugging Bart tossed it away, it wasn't what he was looking for. Inside the box he also found a small jewelled box with the words 'Pandora's box' written on the side, again Bart shrugged and tossed it away. Then he picked up another item he wasn't looking for. It was a rusted old copper lamp that had a thick layer of dust on it, and again like all the other useless pieces of junk he'd found in there he tossed it away.

This box was full of junk and if Bart was in any other mood he would've just given up and walked away, but that drumming and battle cry was somehow enticing him to continue searching. Moving several other weird looking items out of the way he found what he was looking for right at the bottom. He reached out and touched it and the moment he did the drumming abruptly stopped.

Bart felt the wooden, craggy surface of what he had just found and pulled it free from the pile. He'd found it! He'd actually found it! He held in his hands after literally hours of searching, the Mask.

* * *

"Rig the mayoral election, again?" Bob echoed Fat Tony's words.

"That is what I ask of you" the mafia boss said stubbing his cigar out in the ashtray.

"You do realise I've tried this trick before and that I won't ever get back into the mayor game again because of it" Bob went on.

"From what I hear you nearly got away with it." Fat Tony said

"Yes, if it hadn't been for those meddling kids" Bob muttered, his eyes looked dark for a moment as he recalled what they did to him. Fat Tony knew it all too well however.

"It was your own pride and ego that was your downfall" Fat Tony stated "You boasted about rigging the election, in court when you were accused of rigging the election. Not a smart move on your part."

"Those kids knew I'd give into my pride when they tried to make out that the fat, radio idiot Birch Barlow did it all. HA! He wouldn't know where to start unless you laid a mile long buffet table to it."

"Well, rest assured Terwilliger, I do not intend to put 'you' up for the elections. I have my own candidate in mind for that." Tony said "I just want you to rig the elections so when the time comes my man comes out on top."

Fat Tony could see Bob was considering the offer but had a sense of ambivalence about it. Probably unsure about whether he should trust Fat Tony and whether or not this scheme might backfire again and get him caught and thrown in prison again. Well with all of his schemes he's been caught and thrown in prison so in that respect he had nothing to lose. But maybe Bob needed a little more prompting.

"Now I respect you Robert Terwilliger" Fat Tony said "Out of all the people in prison you're considered one of the craziest and most dangerous by the cops, far above how they thought of me and I can still have a man killed while still on the inside. Rest assured, for your services you will be richly rewarded." Fat Tony stood up and held out his hand to shake Bobs, but Bob didn't immediately grab it "So do we have a deal?" Fat Tony said.

"What if I refuse?" Bob asked with that quizzical and accusing look in his eyes again.

"Hey, if you refuse you refuse" Fat Tony shrugged and withdrew his hand "but keep in mind that you probably won't walk out that door alive if you do, because I hope you're not forgetting that you tried to steal one of 'my' cars."

"Then it seems I have very little choice in the matter" Fat Tony held out his hand again. "Deal?" the Mafia boss asked again

"Deal" Bob said as he took the mafia bosses hand and shook.

* * *

Bart put all the other worthless items back in the box, put it back where he found it and replaced the attic hatch before taking his chair and the Mask back into his room.

He shut the door and jammed his chair under the door knob to stop someone bursting in on him. Then he turned to the Mask and gazed upon it with excitement. What should he do with it tonight?

The mischievous boy had a list of pranks he wanted to do from last night but never got a chance to do them because he was stopped by the rising sun. So the Mask didn't work during the day, so what, he could manage. But as he gazed at the lump of wood a thought crept into his head, it was his conscience again reminding him of something.

'_How can I explain that the Mask only gives you the illusion of control when it's only a matter of time before it tries to drive you to do something truly against your nature?'_ Lisa's diary had said, and Bart had to admit that some of his prank ideas could cause some serious deliberate harm and damage but nothing he would think was fatal.

Bart, absent minded, took a step forward and something crunched under his foot. He took a step back and looked down at what he had stood on. It was the Radioactive man Radiation Mobile he got for his birthday three weeks ago with the action figure of his greatest hero –next to Krusty the clown- Radioactive man sat in the seat, its plastic eyes gazing up at him. Bart had just stepped on the red car and snapped the drivers side door off it. He only had it three weeks so he was pretty bored with it anyway and it was nothing when compared to the Mask.

Wait a minute! A thought popped into his head as he stared into Radioactive man's plastic eyes. Why didn't he think of this before? The Mask gave him super powers, and what lazily written movies have taught him over the years is that with super power comes super responsibility... or something like that. Either way, the mask granted super powers on the wearer, so why not become a super hero?

It was every eleven year old kids dream to be a super hero and now he could be one. He could put the powers of the Mask to good use and prove to Lisa that its powers can be channelled for good, if the right person wears it.

He glanced at the clock on his wall which was in the shape of the face of his other hero, Krusty the Clown, it read 5:00pm. He had three hours until sun down when the Mask became active, and in those three hours Bart would turn _Green Face_ from a mischievous troublemaker into a heroic crime fighter.

* * *

**To be continued...**

* * *

**Author's notes: **The other items Bart takes from the box were, the cursed game Jumanji from Jumanji, Pandora's box from the myth and the lamp from Aladdin. There was no reason to put them in there other than to have a little more randomness like in the series.

The family meeting around the table was based on the scene from 'the Simpsons Game' when the family discuss their new super powers they've been granted by the games maunel.

The drumming that Bart hears is made by the Mask. In the script for the unmade Mask 2, Stanely hears a similar noise from the Mask he has locked up in his closet.

Minor note, I've never read a girls diary before so I don't know what they put into it, but I've tried my best.


	23. Mask Justice

**Chapter 22**

**Mask Justice**

It was 9:30pm when Milhouse got an unexpected call over the two way Krusty-Talky that enabled him to stay in contact with his best friend Bart Simpson. Bart told Milhouse to meet him at Springfield Elementary in the playground. Milhouse tried to explain that he couldn't come out and play tonight because his mom had instructed him to go to bed and stay there until morning. He was grounded for five weeks after she found out he and Bart were out the playing a prank on Principle Skinner two weeks ago. But Bart had been so insistent that they meet up this time that he snuck out through the window catching his sleeve on a lose nail on the way down that left him hanging for a couple of minutes before his shirt ripped and he dropped to the ground a little shaken but not harmed.

When he arrived at Springfield Elementary he had to admit it was a little creepy to see the school at night. It looked spooky like a scene from a horror movie, an idea that felt all the more real because Milhouse held the belief that the teachers actually lived in the school and that they slept in the janitors closet, he believed that because once he heard strange mumbles noises coming from it and saw Mrs. Krabapple and Groundskeeper Willy leaving the small space a few minutes later straightening out and putting certain items of clothing back on as they walked away.

He was scared because after he told Bart his theory his best friend then went on to confide in him a dark secret of the school. The secret that if teachers found anyone trespassing on school premises after dark then the teachers threw them in the mystery meat to be served to kids the next day, and that was the reason it tasted so horrible because it was usually made from deadbeat hobo's. Milhouse didn't want to be thrown into the mystery meat to be eaten later.

He began to shiver in fear of this and expected a monster to jump out and grab him at any moment. Then a hand landed on his shoulder and he screamed at the top of his lungs.

"Hey Milhouse, it's just me!" said Bart's voice. Milhouse panted as he caught his breath but struggled to breath. That fright had triggered off an asthma attack but a quick puff on his inhaler in his pocket fixed his lungs.

Bart was wearing his outdoor jacket, his lucky red cap which was pulled down over his eyes as if he didn't want anyone to see it was him and slung over one shoulder was a backpack that should contain the materials for Bart's next big prank, but tonight it appeared to have very little in it.

"Bart!" Milhouse said his bushy eyebrows descending in annoyance "This had better be good, my mom's taking me to see the gummy bears musical tomorrow and I can't stay out too late tonight." Bart started leading him towards the play area which had a few swing sets, a teeter-totter and a merry-go-round.

"This is going to be better than seeing the... the what?" Bart asked and looked back at Milhouse with a look of 'Did I just hear you say that?' on his face. But Milhouse decided it better not to repeat himself and thankfully Bart didn't dwell on it. He went on with why he'd called him here. He took the rucksack off his shoulders and set it down on the ground and started to unzip it.

"Milhouse, tonight we are going to become super heroes!" he said. At first Milhouse thought he'd miss-heard what Bart said until he continued with his explanation. He reached into the bag and pulled out a dirty looking, green, wooden mask. "I found the Mask, Milhouse."

"That's the Mask? Wow!" Milhouse gazed in wonder at it. That was the Mask that gave its wearer powers according to Bart but it wasn't how Milhouse imagined it. He thought it'd be a rubber looking thing, he didn't expect it to be made out of wood. "Can I wear it?" he asked eagerly holding his hands together tightly almost in prayer at Bart to let him have a go.

"I've got a better idea" Bart said pulling the Mask a little further away from Milhouse. "With the help of this Mask we can turn _Green Face, _and ourselves from an outlaws into a crime fighter!"

"Me? A super hero, wow!" Milhouse said in awe through his thick, red spectacles and launched his mind into a fantasy world where he was the hero of Springfield, people admired him, and girls loved him, especially Lisa. "Who's going to wear it first?" he said hoping it would be him.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, Milhouse, I'm going to wear it and you get to be my sidekick. By day we'll be a couple of school kids, but by night we'll become..." he held the Mask up in the air like a magic talisman in a pose that would've looked impressive had Bart not been eleven years old and the Mask not looked so un-impressive. "..._Bartman_ and _Houseboy_!"

"Bart, I don't know what my mom would say if she found out I was fighting crime at night." But Bart didn't appear to be listening as he gazed up into the Mask and from its inside came a quick, ominous green glow. Slowly Bart began to lower the Mask towards his face.

Milhouse could feel the air around him gradually getting colder and colder. A slight gust started to gently blow from no apparent source and a sizzling, fusing type noise came from the Mask the moment it made contact with Bart's face and Milhouse watched in horror as it began to deform and stretch its form over Bart's head encasing him. The slight gust became a gale when Bart's form, after a sudden crack of bright light, suddenly twisted and started to spin around so fast he formed a miniature tornado.

The swings, the teeter-totter and the merry-go-rounds all began swinging and spinning of their own accord as if pushed by ghosts as the tornado zoomed almost uncontrollably around the area.

Milhouse then started to become aware of music which started to fill the air around him, music that sounded like it belonged to an action type cartoon show yet was like nothing he'd ever heard before. It was a strange sort of fanfare that accompanied Bart's transformation and had their lives been a cartoon then this would've been _Bartmans_ theme.

Suddenly the tornado started coming straight at Milhouse and he held up his hands in front of his face to shield his eyes as it rammed into him sweeping him off his feet and forcing the world around him to spin around faster and faster and faster, but only for a few moments. When he came to a stop he noticed his clothes had changed, he was wearing a strange looking costume. It look pathetic, it looked like his own clothes only his shirt was blue with an H on the breast, he had a yellow cape that only went down to the small of his back and he wore a black eye mask under his glasses that hid his eyes.

Bart's spinning form came to an abrupt halt with the sound of screeching tyres and once he'd stopped everything became still again. Barts own superhero costume looked much cooler then Milhouse thought his looked. Bart's hair, which last time was arranged in thick clumps and resembled a jesters hat, was now curling upwards in the air like a crown or like the hair of an anime character when they powered up. He also wore a black mask over his green rubber mask, only it was a black mask that covered most of his face except for the mouth area. Bart's costume was much darker the Milhouses making him look like a living shadow and it had a long, black cape that reached down to the floor which also made him look much more imposing then his own pathetic looking costume.

"Tonight Houseboy, Bartman Begins!"

* * *

Sideshow Bob had to admit that Fat Tony wasn't a bad employer. He was sort of like how Bob imagined a mafia boss to be, someone who lived in high style, rewarded loyalty and punished disloyalty. Tony even extended the courtesy to take him out to dinner, however his choice of restaurant was not what Bob would call high style, Luigi's Italian restaurant and takeout.

Now Bob was dressed in a finely cut black suit that made him look more respectable despite the palm tree style hair he was still sporting, and he and Fat Tony were boh walked through the door of Luigi's diner flanked on all sides by Fat Tony's henchmen and bodyguards.

The moment they stepped into the restaurant they were approached by a short, Italian with a moustache like two black paintbrushes, his black hair curled out from under his white chiefs' hat.

"Ah! Fat'a Tony!" the Italian welcomed them with open arms "So good'a to see you again! Do you wann'a the usual table?"

"No, no Luigi" Fat Tony said waving away the offer "I'd like a table with two seats, I will be dinning with a friend tonight."

Luigi looked at Sideshow Bob with an almost questioning look before deciding better of asking questions about him.

"Of course, right'a this'a way!" Luigi said leading the pair towards a table and chairs close to the back of the restaurant.

Some might question Fat Tonys' decision to eat out in a public place while they were both men high on the Springfield's most wanted list. But this was the same town that was policed by the three stooges and where a wanted man, after framing a Krusty, attempted murder of a kid and an old woman, could still become the mayor of said town and not be questioned about it. The people of this town were just too stupid to see what was in front of their faces.

"Would'a you like'a the usual?" Luigi asked as they both sat down at the table.

"Yes, bring me the usual, and let my guest here" he gestured towards Bob "have whatever he likes."

From under a white clothe draped over his arm Luigi almost magically produced a red menu and handed it to him. Bob opened it up and glanced at the dishes available but he didn't actually read it, he had more pressing ideas on his mind. "I'll have the special." He said absent minded.

"Oh, good'a choice, sir!" Luigi said excitedly taking the menu from Bob and racing into the kitchen. Bob was certain he heard Luigi shout at the chief "Hey, get me'a bowl of'a crap for the guy with the hair like'a exploding palm tree!" Fat Tony however didn't seem to notice.

"Now, my new friend" said Fat Tony sitting in a very relaxed manner "What shall we talk about?" he said in a way that meant he knew exactly what he wants to talk about.

"We're going to discuss our plans in a public place?" Bob asked.

"I wouldn't worry about being overheard. The last person to listen into my plans ended up in the spaghetti as meatballs." Okay, maybe that was a little too much information, especially since the special Bob had just ordered contained meatballs.

"Where are your cronies?" Bob asked to move the conversation on.

"Let's just say. They are just running a little errand for me."

* * *

"Oh, don't scream and give me all your money woman, or I'm like, gonna totally waste you!" hissed Snake pointing the barrel of his gun at his intended victim.

His victim was an elderly woman of about 30 with long dark brown hair. He didn't know her, which was a bonus because she'd be unable to identify him as Snake the well known mugger and convenience store robber. He'd found this woman walking down this lonely, deserted back alley and decided it would be kind of him to relieve her of a little weight, namely her money.

The woman quaked in fear as she fumbled in her handbag looking for her purse and Snake held his gun firmly at the woman's neck. Snake could vaguely feel that the air around him was getting cooler and cooler and with his attention focused on the woman he failed to notice the mist slowly building around him.

The woman produced her purse and Snake snatched it away with his free hand and started to slowly back away from his victim allowing her to run for her life down the alleyway. Snake turned to run as well in case the fuzz turned up, but he found his left foot stopped short of where he wanted it to go. He immediately lost his balance and fell forwards, the impact made him fire off a shot from his gun along the alley, the noise of which echoed all around him.

Immediately he tried to get up but found that his legs had become caught in something and as he rolled over to see what it was he could see that his shoelaces had somehow been tied together. How the heck did that happen?

As he made to untie his shoes he suddenly felt a slight breeze blow down the now mist filled alley, it was fast becoming a fog and from above a breeze blew as something dark descended from above.

Something dropped from the sky, something large and dark like a shadow. It descended into the mist and landed on its feet, standing as if that long fall had not phased it. It was human shaped, short with long spiked up hair and wore a long cloak which made him look like a shadow in the night, an image that was emphasised by the eerie glow of a street lamp near the mouth of the alley.

Snake immediately brought his gun up to bare directly at the shadow and in fear fired off two shots into the creature. The creature apparently caught the bullets as far as he could tell but did not seem phased, because it began to approach him slowly.

Then Snake realised, it was just a little kid, a little kid wearing a strange looking batman outfit. "Beware evil doer! Beware of _Bartman_!" the boy said grasping the edges of his cape in both hands and spreading it out like a pair of bat wings. Snakes felt a shiver run up his spine, not because of that iconic Batman like image, it was the fact that this boys masked face had two holes cleanly going straight through his head from where he'd shot him, so clean that Snake could see the ominous glow of a street lamp at the end of the alley through them.

Quickly Snaked slipped off one of his shoes rather than waste time trying to untie the tangled laces and quickly got to his feet as the midget Batman came towards him. Snake prepared to sock a punch to the freaky boy, because whoever this boy was he was defiantly not human because as Snakes' fist made sharp contact with the boys jaw Snake heard a snap as _Bartmans_ body stumbled back and... and the force of his punch had made his head bend backwards the wrong way so much it was as if his neck was made of elastic.

_Bartmans_ hands fumbled for his head for a moment checking to see if his head was still there. Reaching back his hands picked up his head and firmly re-attached it to his shoulders while he said, "You know, in moments like this I just lose my head!"

This was totally freaky, so freaky that Snake turned and made to run for it. But the moment his back was turned his legs were suddenly forced together by something long and thin which had become wound around his ankles binding his feet together and in the next moment he was swept off his feet and forced to hang upside down from a line of rope which disappeared into the darkening sky above.

"Why don't you just hang around here for a while? Until the police show up!" the figure grinned showing a set of white, gigantic teeth, and with a gigantic leap _Bartman_ vanished, leaping into the air like a human rocket and vanishing into the night.

* * *

Bart landed on the roof of the building adjacent to the alleyway where he'd just stopped dispensed some justice. Milhouse sat just staring down at the criminal Bart had just tied up as he landed. Milhouse just stared down at the criminal with a look of awe and sickness.

"Hey thanks for the help, chump!" Bart said annoyingly as he joined his so called sidekick on the rooftop.

"Umm..." Milhouse muttered uncertain "you looked like you didn't need my help. Anyway I'm not too good with heights."

"What kind of sidekick are you?" Bart said in a voice that hardly sounded like his own.

"One that doesn't like heights" Milhouse commented

"HA Sidekick?" Bart laughed "you're more like a dipstick."

"Bart, I don't have any super powers like you, I can't fight and I'm not invincible. Maybe if you just let me have a turn with the Mask for a change..."

"Self, self, self, self, self!" Bart mocked as his rubber brow furrowed in annoyance. "Maybe I made a mistake making you my sidekick, maybe I made a mistake making you my friend!"

Milhouse looked almost too shocked to say anything. "You... you mean you don't want to be friends anymore?"

"Hey, what do you know!" Bart said pressing his index finger into Milhouses nose, pushing his glasses further onto his face "Glasses 'do' make you smart!"

"But... but... Bart, we've been friends for years!" Milhouse pleaded.

"Well then that's obviously why I'm so sick of the sight of you!" Bart countered.

"But... but..." Milhouse stuttered as tears welled up in his eyes.

_Oh boy, here come the water works_ Bart thought as Milhouse continue to blubber. "You can make your own way home!" Bart said as he leapt over the side of the building and fell towards the ground before landing in the seat of an open topped black car with spiked back wings that he called the _Bartmobile_. The canopy hissed down over Bart and his car shot forward away into the night.

"But Bart!" Milhouse cried after him "I can't get down!

Stupid Milhouse always getting in his way. Bart... correction _Bartman_ didn't need a side kick, he was a one man army and he could do anything while he wore this mask and though he felt its power he did not once feel that his actions were out of character from his own in any way or form. He was just behaving like he wanted to, as he always does anyway.

Suddenly something tingled in his head, a sort of nagging he couldn't seem to get away from. It was his Bart-sense, it told him when someone was in trouble or in danger.

Quickly Bart swung the Bartmobile around full circle nearly smashing into several other vehicles as it turned and headed straight back in the opposite direction. Bart didn't know how he managed to get this vehicle, he was only aware of its existence when he fell from the roof and landed in it and he didn't even know he wanted it, but Bart was getting to the point of just not questioning the weird logic of the Mask and just went with it.

Suddenly he got a sense that he had reached his destination where a crime was happening and forcefully put on the breaks and the Bartmobile came to a screeching halt outside a convenient store, a signal story shop with the words 'Kwik-E-Mart' in big red letters along to the top.

Parked outside was a large black car, a large black car that Bart recognised. It was the one he stopped last night and stole its engine before being caught out by the sun. It was the one that belonged to Fat Tony and his Mafia! This was it, Bart's shot at big time crime busting, and exactly what _Bartman_ was born to do!

The hatch of the car slid back and _Bartman_ leapt out, the cape billowing out behind him and made his way towards the Kwik-E-Mart doors while staying out of sight. Inside _Bartman_ could see the short, skinny man with curly hair from last night. This stick of a man was flanked by two larger men with muscles bulging under their black suits, they were literally the muscle.

'Stick man' was shouting to the owner of the store, Apu, a tall dark skinned Indian man wore always seemed to be wearing the same green jacket –doesn't he ever change his clothes –come to think of it didn't anyone in this town?—Apu had his hands up in a disarming manner.

"Fat Tony doesn't like it when you don't pay protection, Muslim!" 'Stick man' said.

"I am a Hindu!" Apu shouted back "There is a difference!"

"Whatever" 'Stick-man' said dismissing it with a wave of his hand "When Fat Tony don't get paid, he gets real upset, and when Fat Tony gets upset, I get upset, and when I get upset, Tommy and Jason here get upset, and when they get upset they break things!"

"But I have no money to give you!" Apu pleaded "I have a wife and eight kids to feed, I can't afford protection!"

"Yeah? Then you should've kept it in your trousers!" 'Stick-man' insisted, and the muscle behind him sniggered "Tommy, Jason, wreck the place."

The two large goons clenched their fists and smacked them into their open hands to prove they meant business. They then went over to a shelf and tipped it over easily so its contents fell and spread across the floor before they started stamping on the packets that fell from it.

"Oh, no please!" Apu pleaded "I cannot afford new stock!"

"Then you should've paid your protection money" 'Stick-man' said coolly as his goons continued to wreck the shop.

It was time for Springfield's number one crime fighter to make an entrance Bart decided.

One of the goons went up to the freezer and opened it up with the intention of pulling out the ice cream and frozen foods when... a small ten year old boy suddenly stepped out shivering violently. He was covered in ice and his face looked a bright shade of blue.

"What year is it?" Bart asked trying his best to make it sound like he's just woken from suspended animation.

"Huh?" 'Stick man' said in clear confusion.

"What year is it? I ask" Bart said shivering a little. "I'll tell you" and chose that moment to smile and showed his freaky large teeth that clearly spooked them a little. "It's the year you get your butts kicked!"

A thick cloud of black smoke suddenly erupted around him obscuring him for a second. When the cloud cleared Bart had changed back into his _Bartman_ outfit and his face became lime green again.

"Beware evil doers, of_ Bartman_!" Bart said spreading his cape like before, "This store already has protection!" and Apu, 'Stick-man' and his goons gazed upon him in utter disbelief.

"What do we have here boys? A baby in costume!" 'Stick-man' mocked suddenly not as impressed as the rest of them"Run along kid, or you might get hurt."

The words had no sooner left his mouth then a large, red boxing glove had smashed him sharply in the face. A red boxing glove that sat on an extendable arm _Bartman_ was holding. The skinny man fell back and landed in an open counter freezer and the lid dropped down on top of him.

"Cool off!" Bart quipped as the extendable arm on the boxing glove folded away and appeared to vanish somewhere inside his cloak.

The two goons looked back rather dumbly at their freezing boss in the freezer before turning back to look at _Bartman_. The largest of the three, a real gorilla of a man advanced towards him and reached down and grabbed Bart's shoulders and squeezed them tightly.

In his mind Bart could think of only one thing to do. When the goon squeezed his arm he allowed his head and eyes to balloon out cartoonishly, an act that did not even hurt him but was an act he imagine would hurt Magalia the Gorilla here, especially when _Bartman_ brought his foot sharply into his groin before grabbing his trouser waist line, shouted "LIFT OFF!" and pulling his pants up to his chest and this time the gorilla's eyes really did pop out in pain just before Bartman whacked him over the head with a frozen chicken, and he fell to the ground unconscious.

"You want'a piece of me?" _Bartman_ said in a mock Italian accent to the last of the Mafia goons. Then he grinned broadly just before he grabbed his left arm with his right hand and pulled so hard his arm actually snapped from his shoulder. "You can have this piece!" he said as he tossed the broken arm at him.

The massive goon, who not long ago looked cool and menacing actually looked like he was about to freak out as the arm came at him and its hand clamped him over the mouth as if it were still alive. The goon reached up and forcefully ripped it off his face, but the arm still wriggled with life as it clenched its fist, and raised two fingers and brought them sharply into his eyes. Yelping he let go of the arm to clamp his hand over his eyes in pain. The arm snaked from his hand down to his trousers, reached down the back and pulled his underpants into an over the head wedgie that snapped down over his chin and in his blind panic to remove his underwear from his face, stepped on a can of buzz cola, slipped and fell back and banged his head on the shelf he upturned.

"and that's a knock out!" _Bartman_ cried raising his remaining arm above his head in victory as his missing left arm snaked back into place. "No need to thank me, and no autographs please!"

"What have you done you stupid child?" Apu cried at him in horror. That was odd, shouldn't he be thanking him for saving his store? "Fat Tony will just send more of his Mafia henchmen and this time they will probably hurt me and my family!" Apu was close to tears as he yelled. What a wimp!

"People like you are never satisfied!" Bart stated fixing Apu with a stern look and crossed his arms over his chest. "A heroes work is never done." He said turning and stood in a pose he thought of as pretty impressive, if he had not stood only a few feet tall. "I shall attack this problem at the source." Bart proclaimed as he turned and left the Kwik-E-Mart with determination in his step. It was time for _Bartman_ to attack crime at its source, the source being the Mafia and the person in charge of the mafia. Fat Tony was now his target now all he had to do was find him!

* * *

After a rather disappointing meal from the restaurants chief Fat Tony began to lay out his plans for gaining control of the town to Bob while they drank a little wine. Tony explained who was going to be in charge –someone who turned out to be some weakling loser called Gill- someone Fat Tony could easily control, what Fat Tony intends to do when he's got control, why he's doing it and so on. Mostly stuff Bob wasn't much interested in so he just politely nodded and asked a few why's and how's to make the Mafia boss think he was interested when he really wasn't, that is until Fat Tony made mention of a certain buffoon of a clown.

"Krusty the Clown has been a source of a great deal of joy and a great deal of heart ache in my life" Fat Tony explained but didn't go into detail. "and in this business, heart ache vastly outweighs dealings of joy. So for your services, the clown who put you into so many humiliating positions can be silenced, or if you so wished, you can deal the blows yourselves face to face."

"Vengeance is best served in person" Bob said calmly as he drummed his fingers together, the chance to fire pies at Krusty or fire him out of a cannon and kill him was almost too good an opportunity to pass up, but Bob wanted more, much more "But what about the boy who sent me to prison in the first place?"

"The Simpsons have also been another source of joy and heart ache for me, mostly heart ache though." Fat Tony explained "But if a boy vanishes then there is nothing I could do, as the... as we should say 'mayoral advisor', could do to stop police interventions. But if you want the boy then we can arrange a little 'accident' where you just so happen to be holding the implement that brought about said accident."

"I like it" a slightly mad looking smirk curled at the side of Bob's lips as he sipped the glass of wine, it was terrible, the wine not the plan, it tasted like a diabetic had taken a whizz in it but Bob stopped himself spitting it out so he didn't offend his new 'employer.' Instead he lowered his glass back down to the table because he did not intend to drink any more of the foul liquid.

Slowly the lights dimmed in the restaurant until the entire dining area was in semi darkness. Were the lights on the blink?

"Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls" said a voice that echoed around the room as if on the loud speaker system and spot lights started swirling around the room like at a theatre show. "Tonight! Ay caramba-entertainment limited presents..."

The spot lights converged on a pair of large red curtains, where the heck had they come from? Suddenly they parted revealing a small boy in some kind of Batman outfit. "...'the night Fat Tony gets his ass kicked!"

"What is this some kind of a joke?" Fat Tony said banging his fist on the table.

"No, this is a joke" the boy grinned and everyone was almost blinded by how shiny and white his teeth were, everyone was also amazed at how large they were as well. When the shine was gone he had a microphone in his hand and a brick wall had somehow materialised behind him. "You know if there's one thing I've leant it's the secret to eternal life is honesty and charity... and if you can fake them then you've got it made!" the boy grinned at his own joke showing his dangerously large, white teeth again.

"You know Chief Wiggum said it's a mystery how Fat Tony could escape a maximum security prison. A bigger mystery is how Chief Wiggum can eat less then Homer Simpson –the human garbage disposal- and yet is still a fatter bastard then him!" surprisingly Fat Tony did chuckle at this remark Bob noticed, and... Bob just couldn't put his finger on it but the boy did look vaguely familiar.

"Environmentalist say the sea level will rise in the next ten years, flooding most of America. A disaster yeah, but not bad news for the hillbillies though because after years of inbreeding they finally have a use for their webbed toes!" this time the entire restaurant burst into laughter.

"Hmm. I must congratulate Luigi on this choice of entertainment" Fat Tony commented out loud "and out of gratitude I will let that first jest pass".

"Sorry'a Fat'a Tony" said Luigi who just happened to be standing beside him and heard what he'd said "But despite it'a might anger you and make'a you look like a fool, but we'a do not provided entertainment while you eat'a, except for the same Italian band playing the same songs night after night, over and over again.

That was odd then. If this wasn't planned entertainment then who the hell was up on that stage. Come to think of it, where the hell had that stage come from in the first place?

"Here's a neat trick I learnt from Daffy Duck!" the boy said as his costume somehow morphed into that of a chef with a large white floppy hat and in his hands were a large chicken and a gas can. He opened his mouth wide, and Bob meant wide, so wide it caused a few eyes in the audience to grow wide as they all viewed the odd sight. His mouth opened wider then a trash can lid and he simply dumped the large chicken into his mouth and poured a large amount of gasoline down his gullet and swallowed everything in one. From his pocket he then produced a box of matches, opened it, took one, closed the box and struck it on the side of the box so the match head caught fire. He raised it above his head and opened his mouth wide.

"You know, the only problem with this trick is usually it can only be done once." He positioned it over his mouth "Kind'a like how suicide bombers don't give a repeat performance!" he said before dropping small flame down his gullet, and he snapped his mouth shut.

The next moment there was a muffled explosion as his stomach ballooned out to more than twice the size of his head before reducing back down again, as this happened his cheeks ballooned out to three times the size of his head and when he opened his mouth both Sideshow Bob and Fat Tony had to duck under the table as a jet of flame erupted from the boys mouth and shot over their heads to the sound of screams and gasps from everyone else in the restaurant.

Both of the criminals waited under the table for a few seconds until they were certain the flames had past and raised their heads over the side of the table and found the table cloth singed and burning. The boy belched loudly as he fixed them with a look of obvious insane dislike.

"Great balls of fire!" the boy quipped as with one leap he jumped from the stage and landed on the burning table and glared at Fat Tony. "I bet you haven't been so shocked since you paid to see Godfather 3."

"Boys! Advance on him!" Fat Tony ordered of his body guards who were already on their feet ready to defend their boss. They all drew their pistols, raised them ready to fire, only to realise they didn't have guns in their holsters, but bananas!

This didn't stop the restaurant customers screaming in terror, they obviously thought they were real guns –even though a moment ago they were- and before anything could happen they all jumped out of their seats, turned over chairs and tables as they desperately stampeded out of the restaurant.

The body guards gazed at the bananas in confusion, one scratched his head, another looked into his jacket to try to find where his gun went while the other just remained dumbly confused. The boy suddenly appeared behind them, draped one arm over one goons shoulder while munching on a banana in his other hand that had already been pealed. His hair had somehow re-grown itself into a mop top style.

"Hey, hey, we're the monkeys!" the boy quipped again tossing the empty skin on the floor as one of the larger boy guards turned to grab him. He stepped on it and slipped back, raised his foot and accidentally brought it into the groin of the other body guard, who doubled over in pain.

"What do they call you, the nut cracker?" the boy said rolling his eyes in a very creepy fashion.

The bodyguard got up quickly and slowly began to advance menacingly towards the boy. "Now, hold it, hold it, hold it!" the boy said slowly walking away from the large guy with a panicked look. "Why don't we talk this through?" as soon as that sentence had left his mouth the boy reached behind his back and brought them forward over his head and had somehow got hold of a large mallet that came down onto the bodyguards feet with a crack. The guy screamed loudly and fell backwards in pain rolling onto his back.

"Beware evil doer!" the boy said as his costume clearly morphed back into his batman like outfit "For I am _Bartman_!"

Fat Tony reached into his inner suit pocket and produced a threatening looking flip knife which he held out in front of the boy trying to make him keep his distance but the freaky kid just kept coming. Fat Tony tried to take a step back and immediately fell onto his back when his feet refused to let him retreat back. The mafia boss hit his head on his own chair knocking himself out. Bob looked down at his fallen employer and saw that Fat Tony's shoes were now encased in solid concrete blocks which explained why he'd just fallen over but there was no apparent explanation for why he was suddenly wearing them.

"Hey, I know you" the boy said referring to Bob in a creepy sounding voice with a slight echo to it. "Bigfoot!" and the boy tapped the large mallet in his hand before raising it up again with the obvious intent of bringing it down and crushing Bob's large feet.

Bob's eye's grew wide at the prospect of having his feet crushed again and he leapt back in a nick of time just before the thing impacted his toes.

"Stand still Bigfoot!" the boy said raising his mallet again "and I'll make you a flatfoot!"

Bob just managed to avoid another swing aimed at his feet. The impact had so much intensity to it that it shook the wooden floor and put a large, splintered hole in it. The shaking ground also causing Bob to lose his footing and fall onto his back.

Robert Terwilliger crawled back as fast as he could on his back to keep the boy in his sights, as he began slowly advancing towards him raising the hammer again for another strike. Bob's hand caught against something sharp, he drew his hand back when the sharp object cut his index finger. The object was the blade of Fat Tony's knife which was laying on the floor near him.

Quickly Bob snatched it up and pointed it at the boy and the tiny batman came to a stop when he spied it. Bob didn't give the crazed boy time to react as he thrust the tip of the knife forward towards the boys torso. But the knife was expertly parried by a... a swordfish? Where the heck had that come from?

"En guard!" the boy said holding the tail end of the dead, yet sharp looking swordfish and had somehow changed his clothes in the blink of an eye. He was now dressed in a costume of one of the three Musketeers, with a long, bushy feather sprouting from his large hat. But this change of wardrobe had also revealed the boys face, or a face of sorts.

The boy was wearing a thick, lime green, rubber mask that somehow managed to display all the normal expressions of a real face. He looked a lot like that crazy girl who attacked him a few nights ago and launched him into the air. It was the one the papers were calling _Green Face. _Why he was attacking Fat Tony or Bob himself he had no idea but the boy was apparently intent on running him through with the nose of the swordfish.

"Heads" _Green Face_ proclaimed as he thrust the head of the dead fish forwards and Bob quickly just managed to avoid it by a hair, but a second later he got slapped in the face when the green boy flipped the fish over and the tail end smacked him in the face. "TAILS!" the boy said when it made sharp contact.

Just then with his moment of disorientation the boy leapt and kicked him sharply in the face and Bob fell back with the world swirling around him and his head spinning, the knife falling from his grip. Unable keep sharp focus he looked up at the boy as his small hands reached down to his mouth and roughly pulled his jaw open and Bob had the unpleasant feeling of something being rammed down his throat.

* * *

Bart had him right where he wanted him, Sideshow Bob, the bane on his life, the one who nearly killed him dozens of times in the past. This was his arch nemesis and soon he would be rid of him for good as he rammed a stick of dynamite into the guys mouth and reached into his pocket for another match to light the fuse that will blow Bob to bits.

This didn't seem particularly dangerous, or wrong in his mind. After all Itchy and Scratchy did this all of the time and they came back every weekend. Plus Bart himself has been blown up, flattened and he hasn't died so Bob should be fine. It was strange logic but for some reason it was reasonable to him.

"You know your teeth could do with a little remodelling, I can help you there!" Bart said as he pulled a lighter from his pocket and flicked it to life "But don't worry, *I* won't feel a thing!" and Bart moved to light the fuse. But before the licking flame could catch the wick he stopped, and hesitated as something pricked his mind. What was it called again? A conscience? It was trying to tell him something, something important and in the brief second that he had hesitated he realised what his conscience was trying to tell him. He was about to commit murder.

Wait a minute, what on earth was he doing? This would kill Bob! It'll blow his head off his shoulders, blast him into a million tiny bits. _'Yeah, but it'll be fun to watch'_ said a voice in his head. Yeah, maybe it would if this was a cartoon, but cartoons weren't real and Bart was old enough to know that, now at least. '_But this is your chance to be rid of him, and no one will ever know it was you.'_

Why was he thinking this? He didn't want to be a murderer, he didn't want to seriously injure people. He just wanted to help people -and maybe have a little fun on the side- but this was just going too far. '_What do you mean? I'm having the time of my life! Just-light-the-fuse and we can be rid of Tree head, wide feet, Sideshow Bob.' _Bart suddenly had images in his head, memories that were being flushed in front of his eyes. The image of Sideshow Bob's evil, grinning face as he climbed onto Bart's bed with a carving knife in his hand ready to stab him as Bart backed away. The memory of when Bob hypnotised him into trying to kill Krusty the Clown. It was as if he was trying to convince himself what he was about to do was right.

But those weren't the only images Bart saw. He also saw an image of Bob as a weak pleading man while he was the mayor of Tuscany begging the Simpson family to not tell the residence what he was so he could live a new life in Italy in peace. There was also the time Bob had actually saved Bart's life from being blown up in a hallowed out hydroelectric dam, before he went murderously insane again. Though this didn't quell the fear in Bart's heart it did give him doubts about what he was thinking of doing.

What was going on? It was like a pitched battle going on inside his head, one side of him wanting to do it, the other side yelling at him not to. Bart's body shivered, he had to think but he was struggled to move the lighter away from the fuse as his two minds fought for a decision to this problem. Unable to move his arms he made a decision. He breathed in deeply and quickly blew out the lighter's flame.

Suddenly he gained control of his limbs again and he dropped the lighter and clamped his hands to his temples as his brain tried to think straight as the war continued to battle on his mind. One part wanted him to just get on and do it because for some reason 'it' couldn't see anything wrong in killing someone, and the other part, the part trying to break through, was telling him it was just plain wrong, and in the middle of this struggle was Bart.

'The Mask only grants you the illusion of control' Lisa had wrote in her diary 'eventually it drives you to do something against your morals' with those words rattling around his head he swallowed his pride and admitted something he only now realised was true.

Lisa was right! The Mask had a mind of its own. He wasn't in control of it, he didn't know what was controlling him but Bart knew it wanted him to commit an act that had every brain cell in his head and every shred of what conscience he had screaming at him, telling him to stop. Yet something was trying to push those doubts out of his mind to make him do it, but he wouldn't do it, he wouldn't!

'_What's up with you Bart? You used to be cool!'_ a voice said in his head. But Bart wasn't listening because he was momentarily granted control of his limbs and he wasted no time in reaching up behind his head and dug his nails into the fold at the back of the Mask and pulled on it with all his strength to get it off his head.

'_Bart, no wait! You'll miss me when I'm gone!' _the voice screamed again. Bart felt the green rubber slowly gain the texture of wood and a large whirlwind blew around his form as the Mask left his face and with it the powers it granted. Bart screamed as the thing desperately clung to his cheeks and stretched them out to about arm's length before it finally let go and let his cheeks smack back onto his face. The Mask became solid and still again.

He breathed in and out deeply as his own mind surged back into his brain, he was too much in shock to do anything for a while as he looked around at the devastation. Tables overturned, people unconscious all over the place and Bob laying on his back looking very dazed with his mouth wide open and the stick of dynamite that was in his mouth had vanished.

From the distance Bart could hear clearly the sound of police sirens, someone had called the fuzz! In a panic he looked down at the Mask and thought of all the things Lisa wrote in her diary, all the worrying she had about being found out by the police and in a desperate panic himself he foolishly decided to get rid of it by tossing the Mask behind an upturned table as if that would get rid of it for good.

A minute later a police swat team broke down the door of the restaurant with a crash and raised their heavy semi-automatic every which way in the restaurant, and with a crash of breaking glass more of them crashed in through the windows sending broken shards everywhere. Through the broken door came Chief Wiggum himself followed by his partners Lou and Ed.

"Alright, _Green Face_" Wiggum said, "Come out with your hands up. We have the place completely surrounded, you can't escape!"

But no _Green Face_ came out from hiding and there were very few places for _Green Face_ to hide. But not once did they consider _Green Face_ was hiding in plain sight in the form of Bart Simpson.

"Hey, I think he's escaped Chief" said Lou off the heels of Wiggums last statement and the Chief of Police glared at Lou.

"Yes, thank you Lou" Wiggum said spitefully "The mayor's going to have my badge for breakfast if we don't bring in _Green Face_ this time!"

Bart decided to try to sneak out the back way before the police spotted him, but stopped when he heard Wiggum say "Hey, aren't you Ralph's little friend?" Bart spun around to face the cop, probably not the best thing to do since they're looking for someone who looks a lot like him.

"Yes" Bart said hurriedly "I'm Bart Simpson"

"Yeah, I remember, Ralph went to your eleventh birthday a few weeks ago" Wiggum stated scratching his forehead under his cap, "Man, Ralph really enjoyed that night, he's still talking about it."

"Hey, Chief!" Lou called over to Wiggum interrupting his talk with Ralph's friend.

"What now, Lou?" Wiggum moaned.

"Chief we can still salvage something from this night." Lou said gesturing at the unconscious people "this is Fat Tony and his some of his cronies with Sideshow Bob!"

At first Wiggum looked unsure what Lou had just said. "They both escaped prison in the last few weeks" Wiggum still looked none the wiser "Fat Tony the Mafia boss and Sideshow Bob the lunatic, attempted-murderer" Lou explained and only then did it look like the wheels in Wiggum's head had finally clicked.

* * *

A few minutes later Wiggum had arrested Sideshow Bob, Fat Tony and his cronies and were leading them to a bunch of squad cars and vans parked outside. Wiggum offered Bart a ride back home which he had accepted. It wasn't the first time Bart had sat in the back of Wiggum's squad car but the Chief didn't know that.

But before leaving Bart wanted to retrieve the Mask from where he tossed it away. He didn't intend to keep it though, when he got home he was going to flush it down the toilet and get rid of it.

Bart rounded the upturned table where he'd tossed it and... it was gone! Where did it go? Bart looked around everywhere, up turning more chairs in an attempt to find it. He even went up to Wiggum to ask if anyone had picked up a wooden mask as evidence, but Wiggum said evidence tagging wasn't going to happen until the forensic boys get here, which they weren't yet.

In the end Bart had to give up his search for the cursed mask because when forensics did arrive they wanted him out of the scene. They were now going through the restaurant with a fine tooth comb but Wiggum assured Bart that if anyone found a wooden mask then he would see to it personally that it got back to its rightful owner.

As Bart sat in the back of the squad car watching Springfield go by he decided he didn't really care who else got hold of the Mask now, as long as he never saw it again in his entire life.

* * *

Caught again, caught again after three weeks on the run from the three stooges and he was caught because of a stupid kid in a Halloween mask. The back of Bob's head hurt where it'd sharply impacted the floor –talk about adding injury to insult- and he still felt a little dazed, but his vision was gradually clearing. He knew where he was, he's been here often enough. It was the Springfield Police station and he was gradually being lead into a cell by none other than the pompous Police Chief 'Piggum'.

The cell block contained dozens of other offenders which now included Fat Tony, most of his Mafia gang, Snake and many others, most members of some gang or other with badly spelt tattoos on their bodies.

"Boy, this _Bartman_ really makes our jobs easier" Wiggum said as he pushed Bob into a single cell on his own, closed the door and locked it behind him. "Get used to these bar's Bob, you're going to be staring at them for the rest of your life."

"Oh, that's the same joke you make every time you catch me." Bob complained sighing as his mind continued to gain some focus "and every time I manage to break out somehow" he shouted as Wiggum slowly walked away pompously twirling the keys around the chain in his hand.

Sighing again Bob sat down on the saggy bed that looked that looked like a used condom, and knowing some of the people who've been in here that's probably what it was used as. He ran his fingers over his face and through his big hair. Three weeks of staying out of sight and he's back to square one, well almost, he was in the jail not the penitentiary, yet, unless he can think of something very, very quickly.

Deciding to get comfortable he slipped off his comically large shoes. They had to be large because they had to accommodate his freakishly large feet, but tonight these shoes contained an additional item. Reaching into his right shoe he pulled from it an odd looking wooden mask. He may have been concussed at the time but he could clearly make out the green faced boy pulling the rubber mask off his face and turning into his number one target Bart Simpson, who tossed the thing behind a nearby table.

He must've been concussed because what he'd just witness was unbelievable and impossible. But surely so was everything else the boy did tonight and every other time someone with a green face shows there... well shows their face. This mask was clearly made of wood, so why did it look like rubber on the boys face. He must be concussed.

When the police arrived and with Bart's back turned Bob for some reason had the compulsion to scoop up this mask and hide it on his person, and his shoes were the best place though he worried about getting splinters in his feet.

Why did he pick it up? It was a worthless looking thing that looked like it belonged in a museum or in a theatrical play of some sort. Worst of all the shape of its face reminded him roughly of the shape of Bart's own face. It was because of him, Bart Simpson that he, Sideshow Bob was in this mess yet again he was certain of it, it was because of Bart that he ended up in prison in the first place, it was his fault all his plans had failed, even those rare plans where his intentions were good.

Gazing at the Mask he tried to crush it in his hand, but it refused to yield to the strength of his angry grip.

He calmed down a little and snorted at it and flipped it over to look into it. Looking at it from this end he couldn't see the resemblance to Bart's head at all but he could see a... a... a strange green glow which passed over the inside of it so quickly he almost doubted it had existed. A soothing type of light that wiped almost all the anger from his mind.

Bob's eyes glazed over, he couldn't help staring down into this thing and couldn't seem to stop his limbs bringing the thing closer and closer to his face.

As it came closer he felt that the air around him gradually became colder and colder, and the lights in the cell block started to flicker. He didn't notice this because his attention was so focused entirely on the Mask. Dark clouds were beginning to form out of nowhere all around him, mostly above his head but the strange black mist was slowly descending and closing in around him like a black fist which became slowly tighter and tighter as he brought the Mask closer and closer to his face.

His nose was about to make contact with it when Bob felt it suddenly pull on his face, he lost his grip on it and it rammed itself onto his face.

He screamed loudly with pain as what felt like a thunder storm was shooting through his face and down his back and into every fibre of his body. This mask felt like it was melting and was beginning to spread itself over his face. His screams of agony were only drowned out by the loud flashes and bangs of light as his form was wrapped in a shroud of electrified, black cloud.

* * *

Wiggum was about to close the door to the cell block when there was an almighty crack blasting out from behind him followed by a tremendous bang which produced a pressure wave that nearly carried the chief of police off his feet.

What was that pressure wave? Had someone snuck in some explosives again, Wiggum had told the prisoners it was illegal to bring explosives into the station, but would they listen? No!

He turned and looked back at the row of cells. All the prisoners were gaping at one cell in particular. One that had an ominous green glow coming from it and quite a lot of black mist.

Wiggum approached, carefully drawing his revolver out of instinct and dived to the floor, rolled over and brought himself up into a kneeling stance ready to fire, but then he heard a loud creak from his back. He yelped and fell onto his back which had a sharp twinge in it.

"Ah! I'm getting too fat for this crap!" Wiggum moaned as he squirmed a little on the floor before slowly getting up and retrieving his weapon. He expected the prisoners to be in hysterics because of his clumsy fall, but they all continued to gaze, mouths open in astonishment at the spectacle occurring in the opposite cell.

There was what looked like a column of whirling, black smoke in the cell which emitted loud thunder cracks and jets of lightning that raced all around it. From inside the smoke column Wiggum was certain he could see a tall, thin figure withering around in agony somewhere inside it.

This was the cell he put Sideshow Bob in, so what trick was he up to now? But when the smoke cleared with an almighty blast Sideshow Bob was nowhere to be seen, there was only... _GREEN FACE_! Or another version of him because he'd obviously changed again.

This one was tall, skinny with a thin face and massive feet. His hair was large and bushed out but curled upwards into several long, sharp looking spikes that looked sharp enough to slice someone in half. He was now dressed in a very creepy looking clown outfit with a jacket of miss matching colours and a rubber flower in his lapel. Dressed like that he looked like he was going to audition for Joseph.

The man had the usual _Green Face_ features such as lack of ears, massive eyes –slightly larger and creepier then usual- and large teeth, except this guy's teeth were so large he shouldn't even be able to open his jaws because they were twice the size of baseball cards, yet he managed it because as his large red eyes swivelled to take the chief of police in. _Green Face_ for some reason said just one sentence in a voice so unearthly it chilled Wiggum to his bones though he didn't understand what the statement meant. The sentence was.

"If you thought Lisa was a pain in the ass, WATCH THIS!"

* * *

**To Be Continued...**

* * *

**Authors notes:** I originally wanted Milhouse to get the Mask in this chapter, but his 'Mask' persona just wasn't working out nor was it going anywhere new in this story that hasn't already been done. So in the end I scrapped it and just moved the story on into the next gear.

The characters Bartman and Houseboy actually appeared I think in a few Simpsons comics.

I had planned for Bart to totally lose it at the sight of Sideshow Bob from the start. I reasoned that if Bart's ID saw the person trying to kill him, his ID's gut instinct would be to kill said person because it's part of a persons drive to survive to remove threats.

Originally I wanted Bart to freeze at something that would cripple Bob permanently rather than kill him, but I decided that there would be more of an impact on Bart's young conscience if the act would lead to murder and since he felt bad about killing a Bird in one of the series episodes it was natural he'd stop himself before killing a person.

Also seeing as Bart watches the violent Itchy and Scratchy cartoons I imagined him trying to imitate them in some fashion eventually.

-Hope everyone enjoyed the new chapter


	24. Here's Bobby!

**Chapter 23**

**Here's BOBBY!**

"Freeze, _Green Face_" Wiggum commanded raising his gun to the green menace "I don't know why you've broken in here, but I'm gonna make sure you stay here."

"Ooooh, he is so forceful isn't he?" the green faced, multicoloured coat wearing clown said in a very camp sort of way.

"And what have you done with Sideshow Bob?" Wiggum was sure he'd put Sideshow in this very cell, now he'd just vanished leaving this green faced freak who Wiggum had to admit did have a slight resemblance to Bob "He was just one day away from going back to jail."

"He found a 'get outta jail free card' in his shoe" the maniac said rolling both his eyes in opposite directions to each other, "So I let him out for good behaviour."

"Well this is the end of your loony tunes, freak. You're under arrest" Wiggum holstered his weapon, somehow under the illusion that he had already won.

"I know I am" the freak said as he raised his shirt revealing a straw vest underneath "I'm already under a vest, but I'd rather not be, it itches like hell!"

Wiggum didn't answer back and it took him a moment to click what he meant. 'Under 'arrest'', 'under 'a vest'' ha, Wiggum wasn't known for his sense of humour but that was clever, but he didn't want to show _Green Face_ that so he tried to remain as stern as iron despite the twitch in his mouth trying to make him smile.

"Well, it's been lovely talking" _Green Face_ said lowering his shirt again and began walking away from Wiggum "But I've gotta pick up the kids from school... before their parents do!"

"And how do you expect to get out of here?" Wiggum rattled the bars with his nightstick to show there was no way for the freak to get out.

"Quite simple my good man" the green faced troublemaker said as he walked over to a door, opened it and walked straight through closing it behind him. Wait! A door? Where did that come from?

Wiggum turned around to go through the door out of the cell block but... all he could see were three dull grey walls, now how the heck did _Green Face _do that? Somehow _Green Face_ had switched places with him, Wiggum was now in the cell and _Green Face_ was outside it.

"Hey" _Green Face_ said sticking his head through the door again "I hear they do good bread and water in here" and he cackled before leaving again slamming the door behind him.

This was a strange feeling Robert had to admit. It was as if reality was out of focus somehow, sort of like the disorientation of being drunk without all the stumbling around or the dizziness. This unfocused view of reality meant he didn't see anything he was doing as particularly unusual unless he thought about it.

Now Bob walked down the corridor wondering where on earth the door was to get out. In his dizzying state he instinctively went for a door on his left and pushed it open and was about to step over the threshold when what he saw beyond brought him to a stop just in time, his eyes grew wide at his mistake. He'd just opened the door on the main office which was full of cops. Cops lazing around in their chairs, some with feet on their desks half dozing, others just standing around eating donuts and talking to their colleges. The room fell quiet and every police officer turned to look at the odd figure who'd burst in on them in the rainbow like coat in almost disbelief.

Bob didn't know how long they stood there staring at him for, seconds, minutes? The silence was broken only once, when Bob said "Hi!" and as one almost every single cop in the room drew their weapons from their holsters and shot guns from under their desks and pointed each black mussel at Bob.

_Oh shit_, Bob thought to himself. At first Bob's expression remained the same with a slight expression of shocked surprise on it. But as the dozens of guns pointed at him he broke into a broad smile that seemed to disturb the cops in front of him, if not because his jaws felt like they held a massive pair of dentures.

"Freeze, _Green Face!_" shouted the black cop Bob knew was called Lou.

"Oh, how tragic, my escape is impeded by the combined efforts of the law enforcement and their foul weapons of death." Bob said raising a hand to his face and resting the back of it on his forehead like a Shakespearian actor.

Why was he talking like this? He should be putting his hands up and surrendering but though his mind was telling him to do this his body didn't seem to want to obey.

One of the cops gingerly approached with a set of handcuffs in hand ready to cuff him. Bob wanted to hold out his hands, grumble a little and be cuffed and led by to his cell, but some other part of him seemed to have other ideas. When the cop was within arms distance Bob did something he didn't expect of himself. He grabbed the copper by the scruff of the neck and tossed him over his shoulder and across the room so rapidly he smashed through the window at the other side shattering the glass. It was a window Bob knew for a fact was three stories up.

"Oh, what light through yonder window breaks" Bob said completely unconcerned that he had just killed a man in cold blood.

"MEN!" Lou called raising his pistol again "FIRE AT WILL!"

In that moment Bob looked horrified, fire meant bullets and bullets meant death, and he didn't want to die. He threw up his arms as if to defend himself and said "Whoa, whoa, hold on guys!" he said in his unearthly sounding voice. He wanted to try to appeal to the cops, say that he was surrendering to them but that's not what came out of his mouth "He said fire at 'WILL', NOT ME!"

But that didn't convince them and he felt thousands of bullets slam into his torso, hands, feet, face everywhere. Though the metal tore through his body all he could feel was what felt like millions of fingers poking him all over his body. Was this numbness a sign of death?

The pelting stopped and Bob didn't know if he was dead or not but he was still standing. He glanced down at his body and could see thousands of holes going through him and exiting out his back. He turned and could see millions of bullet holes in the wall behind him were some shots went wide but most had passed straight through him! He looked back up at the coppers and said. "LOOK MA! I'M SWISS CHEESE!"

In a flash of movement he didn't think himself capable of he was suddenly up close and in officer Lou's face who stepped back into a desk behind him in surprise at this guy's speed, and somehow Bob now managed to obtain a pencil in his right hand.

"Hi there!" Bob glanced down at Lou's thin moustache, he pointed at it with the tip of his pencil "Say, is that a tattoo or do you draw it on every morning?" Twirling the pencil around his fingers he let it stop so the rubber end was pointing upwards and roughly scrapped the eraser head over Lou's top lip and amazingly the moustache was rubbed out as if it was just drawn on. Bob then twirl the pencil the other way and quickly scribbled in a big, bushy moustache and a short beard on his face. A beard and moustache that were actually real, or became real once he'd finished them. _How the hell have I managed to do that?_ Bob wondered.

In his moment of confusion the cops had pulled away from Bob, crowding at the back of the room almost quaking in fear as they reloaded their weapons.

"You call them pea shooters guns?" Bob said grinning a lop sided grin before putting his hands deep into his trouser pockets and pulled out a pair of the largest guns you could think of. In fact, no bigger than you could think of, they had several barrels, missile launchers, flame throwers all you could think of. It was a weapon that a kid at the back of class might scribble on a scrap piece of paper.

The cops in shock dropped their guns and rose their hands above their heads in surrender.

"Oh, put your hands down for crying out loud!" Bob shouted at them cocking the hammers back "Let's try and be civilised about this." Slowly and gingerly they obeyed letting their hands drop halfway before Bob proclaimed "Wrong!..."and fired off a round into the floor making all the cops jump and put their hands right back up. "...I didn't say Simon says!"

_Is this a dream or something? How am I doing all these things?_

"Now Simon says... EAT LEAD!" and he pulled the trigger on his guns and all the barrels fired at once, then fired again, and again like machine pistols all firing directly at the coppers who cowered and threw themselves to the ground in fear putting their hands over their heads as if this would protect them from the rain of bullets.

"THIS IS THE LIFE!" Bob cackled. This must be a dream, hence why reality seemed so unfocused and so malleable to him, but at the same time it felt way too real to be a dream.

He let go of the triggers and his guns stopped firing at once. The coppers lay still for a second before they opened their eyes and realised they were all still alive. Behind them the wall had been completely pelted with bullets, except for a specific area that matched the outlines of the trembling cops before they dropped to the ground.

"Whoops, I missed" Bob shrugged in a way to say he meant to miss. What was happening to him? He never had this sense of whimsy before. Okay he went totally nuts when he was into his job as a murderer and a psycho, but making these wise cracks was so unlike him.

The jangle of weapons signalled to Bob that more coppers were entering the office from directly behind him. In a blink of an eye the weapons he had in his hands had vanished as if they never really existed and he bound for the broken window that he had just thrown a cop through a few minutes ago.

He turned just in time to see more police officers, these ones in full riot gear and heavy weapons, obviously here to investigate the gun fire. The moment they spotted Bob they turned their guns towards him.

"Ladies and Gentlemen" Bob bowed graciously "I bid you, a fond farewell!" and before any of them could fire off a shot Bob leapt through the broken window and found himself floating in air. No not floating in air, 'falling' in air!

He looked down just in time to see a filthy looking hobo just under him. One that he smacked right into flattening both the hobo and himself into the pavement with such force Bob felt his body flatten and become plastered to the ground. It took much effort but Bob managed to peal his own head from the pavement still grinning. "You know, these guys always make me feel flat!"

Pealing himself off the pavement took only a few seconds, this was impossible surely? He looked at his arm, it had been flattened to about an inch! Instinctively he knew how to re-inflating his body, he took a deep breath, stuck his thumb in his mouth and blew as hard as he could and his body just popped back into its original shape.

Regain his bearings he looked down at the hobo he'd landed on and... killed "Sorry about that" he said to the hobo's lifeless, scruffy, bearded face. Hanging from around his neck was a sign which covered most of his torso, on which was painted in crude lettering 'Repent, for the END is near!' "Well, you weren't wrong were you!" and Bob cackled like a maniac.

Now standing up again he saw a row of police cars parked just outside the police station. One had the roof smashed in from the falling cop he'd tossed out a few seconds ago. Well it wasn't like him to leave a job half finished. Bob went up to the next car along and rammed his elbow into the driver's side door setting off its alarm and shattering the drivers side window. Bob then moved onto the next car, pulled out a massive mallet the size of an SUV from his pockets –how was he even able to do this?- and smashed it down on the cars bonnet flattening it and the engine inside.

The mallet somehow became a normal sized baseball bat which he used to whack off the door mirrors of the next car before pointing the flat top of the bat at the gas tank and then came a large blast as something fired itself out of its top like it was a gun.

Aiming a baseball bat/gun at the fuel cap of a car would've been the last thing Bob would ever want to do, actually if he did it, it would've been the last thing he'd ever do, but on this occasion when the car blew up into a massive fireball that destroyed the vehicle and flipped the one next to it over onto the roof of the next car along Bob was fine, he was still alive and he wasn't even singed.

"You know it might just be me" he said to himself still having that insane grin on his face "But I get the feeling that something seriously freaky is going on here!"

That's when he saw it. A flash of green from a door mirror he'd knocked off the now dead car. He knelt down and picked the mirror up and stared at his reflection. His face was green! And it was made of rubber! How the heck had... but then he remembered. The moment before all this weirdness started he'd placed that odd wooden mask on his face. The same mask he recalled seeing Bart Simpson pull off his face when the moment before it had been a green rubber one and Bart had been some kind of Batman kid. It must be that mask he was now wearing, somehow it disguised his features with this green rubber as well as giving him large teeth and so forth but most importantly it's made him invulnerable, indestructible and has somehow given him the ability to warp and twist reality to his own will. This was incredible, his mind filled with all the possibilities.

Just at that moment the front doors of the police department flew open and a platoon of cops scrambled out dressed in full swat team riot gear. The moment they saw Bob they started advancing menacingly on the masked mad man, but Bob didn't feel threatened or frightened. Instead he just smiled again -he seemed to like smiling in this form- and began pivoting on the heels of his massive shoes.

"Hello!" he waved cheerily. He didn't want to waste his time with these losers, he's got so much more on his mind he wanted to do, so he did the only thing he could think of at the time.

"Hey, what's that?" he pointed behind them at nothing in particular and amazingly the entire swat team turned to look at what he was pointing at and with them distracted Bob grinned again and waved before placing one foot behind his other and sped away quicker than the human eye. The last words they heard from him were "Catch me if you can!"

* * *

He'd only rounded a corner when Bob realised he was on a very odd and now slow form of transportation, one which went up and down, up and down regularly. It was a pogo stick, out of all the modes of transportation he could've conjured up why did he choose such a primitive version? He didn't know, all he knew was he just thought of it momentarily and here it was at his disposal. It was as if this thing, this mask on his face that made him capable of all this didn't let him conjure what he wanted, more what his subconscious wanted. Either way he didn't care, this was fun!

He bounced around along the street for what felt like hours and he'd gathered quite a few followers in the form of about a dozen police squad cars who followed just a few hundred yards behind him. Their lights flashed but they did not attempt to run him down, nor did the police attempt to get out and arrest him, almost as if they were afraid of angering him. He guessed it was because they had so many deals with _Green Face_ -whoever he really was-, that they were too scared about what he might do to them.

When Bob first heard of _Green Face _he just thought it was someone who used magic tricks to confound the stupid –and in this town there were plenty of them- but if his instincts were correct and _Green Face _was actually just someone wearing this weird Mask, therefore this made Bob _Green Face_, public enemy number one, and he liked it!

He rounded another corner and in this moment his hopping pogo stick came to a stop and he dropped off it in shock because in front of him was something he didn't expect to see. A tank! No three Tanks! No, no not just tanks, it was the army, the national guard, navy seals. His eyes grew wide and his mouth dropped open so much it smashed into the road causing cracks to radiate out from the impact point, and then his eyes popped in utter horror. It was a natural reaction to this situation though he knew deep down that he could not die while he was wearing the Mask, so far he'd been shot full of more holes then a colander and survived a three story drop so he doubted anything like that would kill him, but that didn't stop him feeling scared.

The tanks gun barrels slowly lowered to have Bob directly in their sights and prepared to fire. He expected a command to surrender and to throw his hands up and drop any weapons, but that command never came, not one chance to surrender. Instead the tank directly in front of him fired its shell at him. What Bob did next he didn't even expect himself to do either.

He held out his hands and caught the massive, solid shell in his hands despite it travelling close to the speed of sound. Looked at it momentarily and unimpressed before shoving it straight back down the barrel where it exploded blasting the tank into a ball of flame.

With one of their tanks destroyed it was as if this was the queue for the army to begin firing all their weapons at him, AK47's, grenades, tank shells, sniper bullets all pelted his body but he didn't feel one shred of this metal, fire and brimstone cutting through his body, and he just didn't die.

Suddenly Bob found in his hands a strange looking type of weapon with a hose that snaked around his back to a large tank which was strapped over his shoulders. Instinctively he pressed what he assumed was the trigger and a long lance of flame erupted from the end of his weapon and smothered the soldiers in front of him with fire.

He eased off and let the flames stop momentarily and turned to look at the survivors. He grinned "I know what you're thinking. Where do I get all of this neat stuff!" he wiggled his eye brows at them "Trust me, it was a steal!"

The army obviously realised after their pointless assault that this guy simply wasn't going to die and so they retreated, they were turning around and high tailing it away from him but Bob just followed and continued to blast the retreating army with flames. "I like mine well done!" he shouted as he attempted to douse the soldiers in flames, but the soldiers were now protected by the tanks which made a barrier between Bob and his targets.

Both the tanks came to a stop and re-aimed their mussels at him, but he wasn't threatened at all, and it showed when he said "You call that a tank? Let me show you a real tank."

With lightening speed that you only see in cartoons he'd hooked up a hose -that he conjured up from nothing- to a fire hydrant, dumped the nozzle into the barrel and used a wrench –which he also pulled from nowhere- to turn up the water pressure. Within seconds water was gushing out of every crevice in the tanks structure and it threatened to burst.

The top popped open and three soldiers clambered out as water bubbled up after them. Water that had shark fins swimming in them and as far as Bob knew those were real sharks in there. Well why the hell not?

Bob then had a weird idea. From his trousers he pulled out a massive looking number two pencil with a very sharp tip. He didn't believe for one moment that this would work yet somehow it did. Using the pencil under his arm the size of a bazooka he drew the outline of a massive hole in the ground under the retreating army before shading it in, in a massive black pen he'd managed to pull from his other pocket.

Surely this wouldn't work, but the army did actually fall through a real hole in the ground and vanished from view. After a few moments Bob heard an audible splash, then flipping the pencil the other way he used the eraser end to rub out the large hole but left a small opening just so he could shout down at them a message. "Give my regards to the workers at the sanitation plant!" and finally he rubbed the last part of the hole out and cackled as loud as ever, so much so he just wanted to fall to the ground and roll around in utter hysterics. But that would have to wait as Bob heard the unmistakable clicks of cocked guns coming from behind him.

He turned to see a wall of cops behind him ready to blast him to oblivion. This was really getting old and he was really getting board with this. Bob couldn't help but notice that the coppers were all trembling in fear, their guns weren't held steadily.

"Hi Guys!" he grinned letting his eyes widen creepily before simply saying in a low, yet still audible voice "boo!"

Just seconds later all that was left of them were dozens of guns that had clattered to the pavement as the police scrambled to get away from him. Only one person remained in position, only because he clearly hadn't noticed his men were retreating. It was Piggum, what was with this guy?

"Can't you just go away?" Bob said getting irritated that this balloon of a man, well he was so full of hot air. But then he had a very twisted idea suddenly creep into his head. "No, wait I'll tell you what, let's play a game. You like games don't you?"

"I don't play games with green face criminals, especially not one who cuffs my ankles together and sets animals on me." Bob had no idea what 'Piggum' was talking about but obviously he didn't recognise Bob in this guise, perfect. Bob went on to outline his game.

"If I can relieve you of your revolver then you back down." He grinned, he felt like a kitten about to play with its food before it eats it. "Ready?"

Wiggum cocked his gun ready to fire his revolver when, as fast as lightning Bob flicked his right arm up and found that a long silver revolver had somehow materialised in his right hand and without thinking he squeezed off a shot. Wiggum's revolver leapt out of his hand. The cop snatched back his gun hand and held it in his other as if he'd burnt it. The shot rang out down the street before echoing back as the chief's revolver spun in mid air, and remained in mid air as Bob squeezed off another shot, the bullet impacting the falling revolver sending it up into another arc preventing it from falling to the ground. Again Bob set off four more shots in rapid succession each impacting the revolver causing it to twirl in mid air until Bob unleashed the last shot and the revolver clattered onto the pavement.

Sideshow Bob raised the revolver to his lips and blew the smoking barrel. "I win!"

Wiggum, undeterred by this quickly knelt down to grab his gun, but Bob wasn't going to let Wiggum cheat his way out of his game. Bob quickly lowered the revolver to bear it at Wiggum and cocked the hammer back again.

"HOLD IT!" he shouted and Wiggum froze before he could reach his gun. "Now I know what you're thinking" Bob grinned again "Did I fire six shots or only five?" he said adopting a rough sounding voice of Clint Eastwood "To tell you the truth in all the excitement I've lost count myself. But seeing as this is a point forty-four magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world and could blow your head clean off." He paused for a moment to let the words hang in the air before continuing. "You've gotta ask yourself a question. Do I feel lucky? Well do you punk?"

Wiggum waited a few moments after Bob finished his speech before quickly scooping up his revolver and re-aiming it at Bob. "You fired six shots, I counted them."

"I didn't know you were good at maths 'Piggum'" Bob grinned "and it's true, I did fire six shots..." and Bob pulled the trigger on his forty-four magnum and a loud bang echoed out around the street as another shot fired from it. Wiggum looked like he was in shock and reached up to a bleeding hole in his stomach that was staining his uniform red. His grip slackened on his own gun and it clattered to the floor again as he clutched the bullet hole with both hands.

Wiggum slowly fell onto his back dying of lead poisoning and blood loss. The last thing he saw was the face of _Green Face_ waving the silver magnum close to his button nose giggling like a maniac screeching the end of his last statement "...EXCEPT I RE- FRICKIN' -LOADED! AHAHAHAHAHA!"

* * *

Just another day in the life of Lisa Simpson, nothing out of the ordinary is going to happen today, oh no, nothing weird or unusual. Mom would wake up first and go down stairs to fix breakfast, Bart would make a lot of noise as he got up which would wake Lisa up –If Bart was good for one thing he was good as an alarm clock- and Lisa would get ready for school while Bart played around and be annoying and for once Lisa wasn't dreading his old mischievous self because it meant everything was back to normal. Then after they had both gone to school dad would crawl out from under his covers, have breakfast, moan a little, wallow in his chair watching TV before deciding it'd be a good idea to go to work.

And indeed that's how the day progressed so far. Miss Hover gave back last Fridays homework of which Lisa got a well earned A, naturally. Bart used the new skate board she'd got him for his birthday to perform dangerous stunts in the playground. Nelson beat up Milhouse for his lunch money and on the way home Otto drove down a one way street in the wrong direction to make up lost time. When she'd arrived home Homer was laying passed out on the sofa having drunk himself into unconsciousness. All in all a pretty normal day.

After eating dinner Lisa intended to go upstairs to her room and continue with some long overdue homework. She walked into TV room on her way to her bedroom and she noticed that the TV was on despite no one watching it. She guessed Dad had gotten distracted by dinner and left the thing on. She noted the news was just starting and Kent Brockman was about to give Springfield its top headlines. But Lisa didn't care anymore, she just walked straight past it because now that the Mask was hidden away there was little chance of her hearing the words '_Green Face_ Strikes again' again.

"_Green Face_ strikes again!" said Kent Brockman.

"Huh?" Lisa came to a dead stop before exiting the TV room "Okay, maybe I misheard that."

"Yes, you all heard right, _Green Face_ strikes again!" Kent repeated.

"D'oh!" Lisa grunted and quickly turned back to the TV, surely Bart couldn't have found the Mask again, not so soon. Surely he wasn't so stupid to track it down and use it again?

"That's right, _Green Face_ last night broke the fifth commandment of the ten, one that amusingly is of lower priority then 'Remember the holy Sabbath' and 'thou shall not make idols', the commandment is 'thou shall not kill another man'. _Green Face_ murdered at least five men in cold blood and injured dozens of members of the national guard in a five hour spree that saw Luigi's pizza restaurant upturned, the Springfield Police department utterly wrecked, the courthouse smashed and the set of the Krusty the clown show burned to the ground."

No, no, this must be a copy cat, that was it. Mom had gotten rid of the Mask, it can't have been the cause of this if no one can get to it. It was most probably another bunch of kids who started copying what they've seen '_Green Face'_ do before. Anyway, it didn't sound like Bart to burn the set of his favourite TV show, more likely he'd make the whole world like the Krusty the clown show, and murder? She may have come close to committing it herself with Bart but she remembered Bart not being like that at all in the Mask.

"Eye witnesses describe how the mad troublemaker turned murderer killed Officer Josh McFly by tossing him out of the third story window in the early hours of the morning last night before jumping out himself without a parachute survived the fall. At the same time killing an innocent homeless person, though it was believed this was an accident." Okay, so he survived a fall, it didn't prove anything. "He then went on to injure countless members of the national guard, destroy a tank killing its occupants and finished off by shooting Police Chief Clancy Wiggum at close range before dashing off into the night.

"Wiggum was transported to a nearby hospital where he was pronounced dead." Chief Wiggum dead? Oh no! Ralph must be devastated. "He was then transferred to a better hospital where his condition was upgraded to alive, and is now in a stable condition." Oh thank Buddha he's alive. If Bart was the cause of this then she was gonna kill him herself and screw the Buddhism beliefs. She took a deep breath to try to calm herself down, she didn't really mean that last thought.

Kent was then handed a hand full of papers from someone off the screen. Kent read them briefly before looking back up at the camera again. "I don't know why you're still handing me these papers when everything's on autocue these days." He said to someone off screen before clearing his throat and continuing on. "Ladies and Gentlemen we have just received footage of _Green Face's_ attack on both the Krusty studio and Luigi's Pizza restaurant."

The picture then changed to a black and white image showing a man in a multicoloured coat –or what could be described as one in this black and white image- and long spiked up hair whirling around with half his body swallowed by a whirling tornado while his arms swung a heavy axe around chopping the set to bits.

"This fifth incarnation of _Green Face_ appears to be much more violent than the previous four and by the look on his face, even more vicious then the little female version" Kent said.

Only the Mask could let a person create that tornado effect, but that wasn't Bart wearing it nor was it Homer, Maggie or Mom, and it sure wasn't Lisa.2. Someone else must have the Mask or at least briefly worn it, but how on earth did someone else get a hold of it?

Then the picture changed to another black and white image, this one she recognised immediately and the time and date of the footage which was printed on the bottom right was unmistakable. This had happened last night. The picture was of another Mask wearer performing certain acts on a fake looking stage in Luigi's pizza restaurant.

"Only hours previous _Green Face_ was seen in the boy incarnation as he tore up Luigi's Pizza restaurant" Kent said. It was Bart Simpson in the Mask, and he was in the Mask just last night!

"BART SIMPSON!" Lisa screamed at the top of his lungs. Screw her Buddhism, she was really gonna kill him now. How could he have been so stupid? How could he have found the Mask again? How could he let someone else get their mitts on that thing?

In a fuming fit of rage she marched upstairs stamping on the steps as she went. What was he playing at? Was he handing the Mask around like a toy to everyone he knew like it was a stupid computer game or something?

She literally kicked in Bart's bedroom door and there he was, calmly sat on his bed reading comics and drinking a drink from a cup with a straw.

"Whoa, Lisa" Bart said nearly choking on the straw in his mouth.

"Bart Simpson, where is the Mask?" she screamed at him stamping her feet towards him.

"The... the Mask?" Bart stuttered.

"How could you have been so stupid?" Lisa fumed, she could feel her face turning red with rage. The moment she thought this family had finally gotten rid of that curse Bart had to dig it straight back up again. "You're dead, Bart Simpson! You are 'so' dead!"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa Lisa!" Bart said actually rolling off his bed to stand on the opposite side of it to keep it between him and his sister, but she slowly started marching around it to get to him her eyes filled with so much anger it was just possible they'd ignite into flame.

"Didn't you listen to me when I told you how dangerous that thing is? Don't you get it?" Bart leapt up onto his bed and rolled across it to the other side to keep Lisa away from him.

"Lisa, Lisa, I get it, okay!" he said in a panic "I got it last night, that's why I don't have it anymore!" he said holding up his hands as if to push her away if she came too close to him.

The moment he'd said this Lisa suddenly felt her anger slowly start to ebb away as if someone had pulled the plug on it, but she still felt annoyed with him. "You..." Lisa stopped and her face softened a little. "You get it?"

Bart sighed and looked like he didn't want to elaborate, probably in case she became angry again. Bart had preformed a lot of stupid stunts with that Mask, stunts he didn't see as stupid himself so what had he done to make him suddenly see the light?

"I wore it last night, I admit it, but I'm not happy with what it made me do." Bart explained "I wanted to use it to become a super hero like Batman, Radioactive man or Michael Jackson. But I totally lost it..." Bart's facial expression adopted one Lisa didn't get to see very often on his face. It was Bart looking guilty and depressed, and this time he wasn't faking. It said all Lisa needed to hear, Bart had had an epiphany last night and realised how dangerous the Mask was. It had took him long enough, but Lisa was still curious what exactly he did to make him suddenly have that epiphany, but she didn't press the matter because the look in his eyes told her that whatever it was, it had been enough.

"Bart, I'm sorry, really I am" Lisa said placing a hand on his shoulder, she could sympathise with Bart since she'd had the exact same experience the first time she wore the Mask. "But we can end this once and for all if you just give me the Mask." She held out her hand for it. But then an idea she didn't really want to think of popped into her head, she remembered it being on someone else's face from the TV broadcast but she was hoping it wasn't too much to think Bart had just been passing the Mask around his friends, but stopped when he saw the light and returned home with it. "You still have it right?" she'd rather not have heard the answer she got.

"No, I ah..." Bart rubbed the back of his head in embarrassment "...when I took it off I was kinda freaked and I sort of threw it away."

"You WHAT?" Lisa yelled grabbing his shirt by the scruff of the neck and pulling him closer to her. Bart's expression became fearful again as she hissed at him. "Where is it?" When he didn't answer she began to shake him. "WHERE IS IT?"

"Hey, hey, relax Lis'" How could he act so cool about it? Who knew what untold damage someone wearing that mask might cause. "The police said they'll return it if they find it."

"Where is it?" Lisa shook Bart by the shirt her anger flaring up again.

"Luigi's restaurant" Bart said his voice trembling a little "I threw it behind a table but when I went to look for it, it was gone!"

"You mean you lost it?" Lisa's eyes burned in panic.

At first Bart didn't say anything before muttering "Kinda"

She let go of Bart's shirt, took a few steps back and grabbed her hair, one point of it in each hand and really wanted to pull it out, this was driving her insane!

"Bart!" Lisa yelled again trying to get across how urgent this was "Someone else has the Mask now! Didn't you watch the news? Didn't you think other people other than us can wear the Mask and harness its power?"

"Hey, as long as it stays away from me" Bart said adamantly, so adamantly Lisa could see a little of how she had acted when she wanted the Mask to be as far away from herself as possible. But right now she'd prefer the Mask to be close to her so she knew where it was then be far away with no idea who had it. Lisa really wanted to strangle the life out of Bart at this point. The Mask was dangerous no matter who wore it, who knew what havoc someone would be causing wearing that thing.

Suddenly there came a light knocking on Bart's bedroom door before it began to open. Lisa quickly composed herself so Mom's mom-radar didn't detect anything was wrong. Then a thought occurred to Lisa, she could tell on Bart, make mom realise that Bart had worn the Mask again last night, that he'd stolen it and lost it. But strangely she didn't, probably because she felt Bart had clearly learned his lesson and she didn't really want mom to punish him further. After all she didn't want to be further punished for something she nearly did when she was out of her own control, and anyway knowing mom she probably wouldn't care as long as the Mask remained away from either of them for good.

"Hey Bart, guess what?" mom said holding up an envelope in her hand. "You've got mail."

"Mail? But it's 7pm." Lisa said. The mailman usually comes at eight in the morning – she knew because Santa's Little Helper would bark through the mailbox- so how did they get mail?

"It's just come through the door. It feels like a late Birthday card for my special little guy." She said holding it out towards him.

"Mom, will you quite it!" Bart moaned as he took it from her and shrank away a little as if afraid she'd try to hug him.

"You may be a year older but you'll always be my baby" Lisa giggled at this despite her mind being worried about the Mask. 'Well, he still acts like one' a voice sad in her head. '_Shut up!_' she commanded of it.

After mom left the room Bart quickly ripped open his envelope and pulled out the birthday card. It was a card but it wasn't really a birthday card. The front of it had the cute picture of a red, cartoon car with big eyes were its windscreen would be. Above that were the words 'Congratulations, you're number one!'

Bart looked disappointed for a second, but then his expression brightened to one of mild excitement as he quickly opened up the card –probably expecting to find money in it-. So it came as a surprise to Lisa when Bart's expression altered as it did. As he gazed into his card his look of excitement became a look of utter horror. Yelping he dropped the card and backed away from it as if it was contaminated.

"What's wrong?" Lisa asked as Bart quickly stepped away from the card like it had the plague. What had he seen in there that was so frightening? A quadratic equation?

Curiously Lisa knelt down and picked up the card. On the outside it read 'Congratulations, you're number one'. Then she opened the card and read the message on the inside '...on a very short list of people I'm going to kill!' which was written in gory, dried blood.

Lisa honestly didn't know what to make of the card. It must be fake and it must be just a joke, but who would play such a cruel prank on Bart? Dad didn't have the intelligence nor the imagination, mom just wouldn't and Lisa herself didn't, not even under the influences of the Mask could she recall doing anything like this.

"Did you send me that?" Bart accusingly pointed at her.

"Of course not!" Lisa defended

"Not you, you. The other you!" Bart snapped

"No, no 'she' didn't either" but deep in her own head she vaguely had a thought which sounded like 'I wish I had thought of it'.

"Then who else would want to send me this?" Bart said snatching the card from her and looking back down at the message. He gulped a little as if contemplating what it read. It was strange though, but Lisa recalled a similar incident a while back where someone was sending Bart countless threatening letters written in the writers own blood.

"Good Evening and welcome to 'the Last Few seconds of your Life!" said the voice of a commentator blurting out from Bart's TV. Did someone stand on the remote? Because she was sure Bart's TV wasn't on a moment ago.

The picture showed what looked like a game show with the letters 'The Last Few Seconds of Your Life' written in giant, blue, 3D letters on the far side of the set. The set was also brightly illuminated with dozens of small bulbs screwed into the walls, most of which either illuminating the signs letters edges or illuminate the image of a person at the other end of the set which came into view as the camera smoothly panned across.

"Please welcome your host, Bobby Green Face!" What did he just say? and the light image of this person parted allowing the genuine article to come walking down a set of steps towards the centre of the game set. The guy had a thin face and wore a long patchwork coat of many colours.

"Welcome, to the last few seconds of your life!" that guy really had a freaky sounding voice, and was it just the lighting or did Bobby have a green face... and didn't he look like the guy with the green face from the news broadcast? "I am Bobby Green Face and my contestants tonight are an odd couple. Both equals and yet opposites, one well behaved, one mischievous. One extremely smart, the other as dumb and useless as Verruca cream is to a man with no feet.

"Please welcome, to the last few seconds of their lives? BART AND LISA SIMPSON!" suddenly the green faced man was pressing his face up against the opposite side of the TV like it was a window and he was watching them! "Come on down and get ready to play the game of your lives, for your lives, cause this is your DEATH!"

Both Bart and Lisa screamed at once at the sight of this. Bart snatched up the TV remote from his bed and pressed a button.

The screen went black for a few seconds before a different program came on. It was the Happy Elves, one of Maggies favourite shows and the small green elves were singing a very irritating sounding song. But the show wouldn't be Maggie's favourite anymore if she saw the new character. The guy calling himself Bobby Green Face had appeared out of the corner of the screen, reached into his pocket and pulled out a large mallet that was far too big to fit in there and slammed it down on all the other characters crushing them to a pulp.

His attention then turned back to the Simpson kids "DON'T TOUCH THAT DIAL!" he commanded, but Bart frantically pressed every button on the remote until the screen flipped to another channel. This appeared to be a cookery show and Bobby was still in the picture, only now he was dressed in a chefs outfit!

"Now all we have to do is pour on the milk like so..." he said in a very bad attempt at a French accent as he poured milk onto something just below and off the screen. "...and there we have it..." the screen zoomed out to show what he was making, it was something in a small white bowl with a spoon hanging out of it "...cereal!"

Bart again pressed at the controller frantically until his fingers somehow found the off button and the TV flicked off and showed nothing but blackness. Both Bart and Lisa gave a sigh of relief, which became a yelp of surprise when they heard someone say.

"Do not attempt to adjust your set..." and along the blank screen from left to right was a white line which curled and vibrated in time with this voice. The kids yelped again as Bobby appeared on the screen again despite it being off! "*I* control all that you see and hear!"

In a moments panic Bart raised the remote and flipped the mute button. Bobby continued to talk to them despite that neither of them could hear him and he seemed unaware that he was muted.

"That guy must have the Mask!" Lisa exclaimed.

"But who is he?" Bart asked turning to Lisa with an expectant look as if she had all the answers, and in this instance she did.

"I think I know Bart, it's..." CRACK! Bobby had gotten wise to his muted position and leaned his head back and brought it rapidly forward impacting the screen and causing a long fracture to run along it. He did this again and the crack became wider and with one final push he shattered the screen with his head and... his head actually flopped out through it as if he was just on the other side of a window. He lifted his head and grinned evilly again with shards of glass sticking out of his face at odd angles and there was a murderous glint in this guys large, blood shot eyes. Both Bart and Lisa screamed in terror louder than they had ever screamed in their entire lives.

"HERE'S BOBBY!"

* * *

**To Be Continued...**

* * *

**Authors notes: **Sideshow Bob's Mask is mostly based off the original Mask from the comic books, but I've also incorporated some other elements of characters like the Joker and the original Betelgeuse into his character.

Originally I intended Bob/Mask to commit more than one murder, but I feared this might call for the story to be upgraded to M so I toned it down so Bob only killed four or five people and injured the others.

I decided to just throw in the army in this chapter because I was getting tired of just having the Mask wearer deal with the police all of the time.


	25. The End Game

**Chapter 24**

**The End Game**

Both Bart and Lisa shrank away as this mad man in the Mask crawled through the cracked hole he'd made in the TV as if emerging into the real world from TV land. Bobby as the guy was calling himself dusted himself down with his fingers before clearing his throat and straightening up.

"Never believe what you see on TV!" the skinny man grinned.

"Who... who are you?" Bart asked a quiver in his voice. He was right to be scared, they both were.

"All in good time, my boy!" Bobby said leaning down to his level and putting his arm around his shoulders. "But first we gotta get to know each other, you know move in together get to become real, great, pals!" he bent his arm around Bart's neck so the boy was half gasping in his grip but not choking.

"Bob listen!" Lisa finally piped up. It was a long shot she knew, but she had to try. "That Mask is dangerous, it won't give you what you desire, I'll just rip your soul out and destroy you and everything around you!"

Bobby's grip on Bart's neck relaxed and he straightened up and Bart fell to the floor gasping for breath. He appeared to be considering Lisa's wise words because he held up his right hand to his face and let the elbow of that arm rest in his left hand. "You know, I'm sure what you're saying is a bad thing..." he said rubbing his chin. Then he flung his arms out wide, grinned like a maniac and his eyes ballooned out to twice their usual size. "... BUT I'M JUST NOT SEEING IT!"

Bart flattened himself to the floor and was slowly crawling along to get to the door. A motion that didn't go un-noticed by Bobby because he flattened himself to the floor next to Bart, put his arms around his neck in a half friendly gesture and said. "Where do you think you're going, aye _spike top?_" He then stood up and brought Bart to his feet by his underwear giving him a wedgie. "Why don't you stay, we're going to have some laughs, you like to laugh don't you, you like pranks, you like making other people's lives a misery for your own entertainment? Well guess what? ME TOO!" and he let go of Bart's underwear and let him fall to the floor.

"Bob, don't you see what it's doing to you?" Lisa pleaded at him. Bob turned to regard her with a curious look to his face for a second, but that expression quickly dissolved into another smirk. He pointed at Lisa's stomach and said "You're wearing a lamp shade!" Curiously and stupidly Lisa looked down at where he was pointing and Bobby flicked her nose up the moment she did. "I can't take a gal seriously if she's wearing a lamp shade." He turned back to Bart for a brief second before turning back to Lisa to add "If we were talking about lamp shades... maybe."

There then came a rattle on the door "What's going on in there? What's all that noise?" said moms voice as it carried through the door. Bart was about to speak, to cry for help when Bob's arm stretched, literally stretched as if it was made of rubber over to Bart and clamped his hand over his mouth and brought him towards himself in a tight hold. Lisa also made to shout for help but she got the same treatment and now struggled to even mumble a word.

"Let me oblige!" Bobby whispered to them and cleared his throat. "Nothing mom, we're just playing Grand Theft Scratchy on Xbox" he'd said that using Bart's voice! "Yeah mom, we're just having fun!" and that was Lisa's voice!

"I thought I took that game away from you!" mom said and Lisa could just visualise mom turning the handle to open the door to speak to them directly, and inwardly she was wishing mom would.

"It's the watered down version." Bobby said quickly in Bart's voice "There's no sex references, nor any attractive woman with big knockers on it. Just fun filled family violence and killing." There was a pause, a long pause, a pause longer than any pause Lisa had ever experienced.

"Oh..." was all mom said "At least they've toned that down a little. Okay just turn it down." _No, mom don't go, don't go, open the door, why wasn't she opening the door?_ But Lisa could hear her footsteps slowly walking away.

"Now, where were we?" Bobby asked dropping both Bart and Lisa to the ground. "Ah, yes" he rubbed his hands together gleefully then he reached out and grabbed Bart by the shirt and hoisted him up off the ground so his feet dangled in mid air. "Where are those transmissions you intercepted, what have you done with those plans?"

Bobby then shook his head as if to clear it "No, wait that's Star Wars" he cleared his throat "You wanna have fun don't you? Well so do I? I know the perfect place for us to have fun!" he said this very fast and as he did his eyes became meaner and meaner and his expression creepier and creepier "It's radioactive, it's explosive, it's the place to be, and it's all going to end in a big BANG!"

Just then the door flew open and Lisa's heart leapt. Their savour had arrived with a stern look holding out a packet of potato chips? Her heart fell, it was only Dad.

"Boy, did you have the last packet of potato chips and didn't finish them?" he seemed oblivious to the green faced person standing in front of him. "You know how much I love food and to waste it like this is just sick!"

"Dad!" Bart wailed trying to get Homers attention and bring him back to reality.

"I don't care what you've got to say." Homer said as he placed his hands behind the small of his back with a stern look on his face and started pacing around the room as if nothing unusual was happening. "Nothing's going to stop me in the middle of this speech! You're gonna..." then he seemed to take notice of the green faced man standing in the middle of the room. His eyes widened but the rest of his expression and his body just froze at the sight of him.

"Hi!" Bobby grinned waving at Homer with his free hand.

"Hello" Homer stood and waved still in shock

"How's it going?" Bobby asked almost casually despite his crazed appearance.

"I'm okay thanks" Homer said in a distant voice, it took him a while to ask "You?"

"Oh, I'm fine, fine. Can't complain, how's the kids?"

Dad looked like he didn't know what to say to Bobby's last comment and looked at each of the kids in turn, why wasn't dad doing something, like screaming?

"Dad, he's trying to kill us, do something!" Bart screamed at him. That broken whatever barrier was stopping Homer from moving, then he did do something. He screamed loud at the top of his lungs.

"Something useful!" Lisa cried when Homer stopped screaming.

"Oh, is that the time I really must be off!" Bobby said quickly tucking Bart's form under his arm, opening the window and started to step out before turning back to Lisa with a murderous look to his eyes that she recognised instantly.

"Don't go away Lampshade!" he said to her "Once I'm done with Spiketop you're next!"

"Lisa, Homer help!" Bart cried but it was too late. Bobby had pushed himself away from Bart's room and landed in the backyard both unharmed, so far. Lisa raced up to the window and looked down at Bobby as he leapt the fence easily and skidded into a very battered looking Police Squad car which sat in a back alley behind the house and if Lisa wasn't mistaken it had splattering of blood on it.

Bart was thrown into the back seat and the door slammed shut as Bobby crawled into the drivers side, started up the engine and drove off as fast as the vehicle would go.

Lisa knew who that was, she recognised that murderous look he'd just given her and the fact that he had pretty big shoes was a dead giveaway. All the facts added up, that person was none other than Sideshow Bob.

* * *

This guy was driving like a maniac. He sharply turned left and right causing Bart –who wasn't held down by a seat belt- to constantly roll from one side of the car to the other.

"Having fun back there?" the crazy man shouted as he fought with the wheel, twirling it this way and that which was odd because the car didn't turn the way the wheel was turned as if it didn't really control the car.

Bart was fast regretting ever getting his hands on that stupid mask. If he had not thought of it as a perfect disguise for a night of pranking he'd have just thrown it out or used it as fire wood or something and none of this would be happening.

Bobby sped down the street at 100 miles per hour despite a sign clearly saying 30 and quickly attracted the attention of a couple of police patrol cars from a side street. They started to give chase their sirens blazing, but this did not fill Bart with hope because time and again he'd see someone outwit and overpower the police with the Mask, admittedly most of the time that person had been himself.

"Whoa, look out we've got two on our tail!" Bobby shouted. Suddenly Bobby's car seemed to crash into something, a box balanced and rotating on its tip and it looked like it was made a glass or something like it because all Bart could see was the shards raining down around the sides of the car.

Through the wire mesh divide designed to keep the prisoner in the back from attacking the driver Bart could see a small screen in the dash suddenly start flipping through several images rapidly. A lighting bolt, a banana peel, a red shell, a green shell, and a red mushroom. The images started to slow down their flipping until it halted on a banana peel. This was strangely familiar to Bart, it was like one of his video games.

"Mario and Donkey Kong are closing fast!" Bobby proclaimed "There's only one thing to do!" He reached into the screen like he was reaching into a water tank because the screen rippled as he reached into it and pulled a real banana peel from it. Then he wound down his window "Banana's away!" and tossed it out the window.

Bart looked out the back window, at first nothing happened until the leading squad car ran over the banana peel. It's wheels didn't even touch it yet the car suddenly slowed right down to about zero and started rapidly spinning repeatedly in a 360. It started spinning even faster when the following police car slammed into the back of the spinning car causing it to slamming into the side of a building.

"Hey kid, take the wheel!" Bobby said and... Bart couldn't believe what he was seeing. Bobby ripped the wheel from the dash, opened a small slit in the wire mesh and handed it to him. Bart was all for a good joke like that but in real life this was just nuts!

With Bart holding the wheel, which didn't seem to operate the car anyway even when it was attached to the steering column, Bobby unclipped his seat belt and crawled out his window onto the roof. Bart looked out the rear window in time to see a massive looking potato launch itself from the top of the car and slam into the pursuing police car bringing it to a complete stop in moments.

Bobby then swung himself back into the driver's side seat and fastened his safety belt. "NOW THAT'S WHAT I CALL A POTATO GUN!" he chuckled.

"Where are you taking me?" Bart finally asked throwing the useless wheel to the floor.

"You'll find out soon" Bobby said as the car took another sharp turn and the Springfield Nuclear Power plant came into clear view.

"Our destination" Bobby said "Oh by the way, duck!" he called and Bart did as he was told as the car crashed through the plants entrance barrier arm cutting the roof and windows off it leaving a twisted mess of tangled metal. Bart sat up again in the roofless car as did Bobby. The green guy slammed on the breaks forcing Bart to slam into the back of the front seat, but thankfully not with so much force that it injured him in any way.

He barely had time to compose himself when Bobby reached in, grabbed him and lifted him from the car in one hand.

"This is the perfect place to play my game, and we won't be disturbed because no one in the whole of Springfield will ever think of looking for us here!"

* * *

"They're at the Nuclear Plant!" Lisa stated as she sat in the passenger side of Homer's car racing down the street following the trail of destruction.

"Okay" Homer said clearly uninterested as Lisa elaborated how she knew.

"Bob said that he was going to take Bart somewhere 'Radioactive' and he would 'go out with a big bang'"

"Uhuh" Homer mumbled as he drove.

"Bob's going to kill Bart by blowing up the nuclear plant, but that'll destroy Springfield as well" Lisa said trying to get this across.

Lisa had calmed Homer down long enough to get across to him that it was important they drive to the nuclear plant. Homer was at first resistant "Go into work when I'm not supposed to work, I don't know that sounds like work" he'd said but Lisa bargained with him and promised not to play her saxophone when this year's Super Bowl was on. Homer had cheered and agreed to take her to the plan. She kind of felt bad because she neglected to remind him that this year's Super Bowl had already passed two months ago.

They'd been stopped by Mom on the way down asking where they were going at this hour, but Lisa batted the question out of the way by saying it was a father-daughter activity. The activity being 'going to the nuclear plant on Homer's nights shift' despite Homer not being on a night shift, but she seemed to swallow it.

Lisa didn't tell mom about Bob and the Mask because she didn't want to worry her. If anything mom would probably just phone the police and Lisa knew from personal experience they couldn't stop anyone wearing that Mask, that and she did try to phone the police the moment Bob left the house but they wouldn't take her seriously, probably because of her age again. She then got Dad to call them up but they hung up on him in seconds. Lisa asked him why they'd done that and Dad had said "Well I was a little drunk a few nights ago..." enough said as far as Lisa was concerned.

So now they were speeding towards the nuclear plant following the trail of destruction that would no doubt lead them to it. They'd past a crashed police car and another with a giant potato crushing its front before driving into the nuclear plant car park. Homer had forgotten his pass to open the barrier and there was a top of a Police car sitting in front of the entrance blocking the way in, and made it look like a police car had sunk into the road. So Homer tried to outsmart it by driving through the plants exit. Unfortunately this had a fatal flaw because he didn't notice the tyre spikes sticking out of the road and all the cars tyres popped in one go causing the car to come to a complete stop.

Lisa opened the car and rushed out. She spotted the topless police squad car Bart had been bungled into parked right next to an open fire exit to the main building where Bob had obviously gone through. Homer following at her heels, he didn't have to because there was nothing he could do against the powers of the Mask. Lisa also realised that she couldn't do much against the powers of the Mask either, but she felt partly responsible for letting Bob get a hold of it –she knew Bart was mostly to blame for it- and she honestly did not have a clue what she was going to do to get that curse off that maniac.

* * *

Bobby had tied Bart up to a chair using ropes he'd magically conjured from his sleeves and coiled them around him until he could not move. Bart tried to struggle and use some sort of escape trick like that magic guy used on that show where he revealed how magic tricks worked. But this trick was far too well done because Bart could not move an inch and the more he struggled the more his bonds seem to tighten.

"You see, Bart" Bobby said the name with a measure of loathing and disgust as he operated some of the controls on a large console on the far side of the room, which was also filled with countless other control panels and consoles that Bart couldn't imagine the function of but Bobby seemed to understand it because his hands were flying over the controls almost like a pianist.

The console he was using sat behind a glass window which showed something that looked like one or two Olympic sized swimming pool set side by side each other with large cubes submerged into it. As Bobby operated the controls the very top sections of those cubes sliced themselves off and started to raise up, with it were dozens of strange, green glowing rods which came from a dozen holes in the lower half of the cubes. "When these cadmium control rods ascend far enough from the reactor core, it will allow the core to enter a chain reaction that will set off nuclear fusion at an uncontrolled rate and that will..."

"Boring!" Bart proclaimed suddenly finding a sense of cool about the situation.

"...that will..." Bobby started again after Bart's interruption "... cause the Uranium-235 atoms to split into two new atoms, releasing an enormous amount of energy but will also eject two neutrons into the next Uranium 235 atom and that will split releasing more energy and another two neutrons, and so on and so on, releasing energy each time until..."

"Still bored" Bart proclaimed again. Bart never once thought it strange that he was mocking his captor when Bobby had the real intent of killing him. The masked man had clearly had enough as he magically produced a roll of duct tape and slapped a patch over Bart's prattling mouth.

"... until the chain reaction reaches critical mass and results in an atomic explosion that will wipe out the whole of Springfield in one go!" Bobby chuckled, lightly at first but slowly became darker and darker until it sounded so dark it was almost familiar. He walked back towards the viewing window, the control rods which rose further and further from the water began to cause the boxes to glow brighter and brighter. He then turned to face Bart a crazed look in those crimson eyes "...and you, my boy, will have a front row seat to the biggest bang Springfield will ever see!"

He turned, and as he did so his multicoloured jacket faded into a smart looking business suit and tie which he adjusted, the suit and tie unfortunately clashed with his green rubber face but he didn't seem to care.

"I must prepare to make my speech to the residence of Springfield and inform them that they are all about to die in a thermal nuclear explosion." He said calmly and casually as if he'd just said he was thinking of going to Burger King for lunch. Suddenly he turned to Bart and asked "What do you think of this red tie? Too doomsday do you think?"

He didn't wait for Bart to answer him, instead he turned on his heels and walked straight back towards the large console and adjusted more controls. That's when Bart saw from a side door the unmistakable star fish shaped hair doo of his sister and the glint of light reflecting off the top of Homer's balled head.

"Now, how long should I give Springfield to panic before the end?" Bobby said not turning to face him, he rubbed his hands together so fast in his intense excitement that they started burning red hot. "Let's say 13 minutes? Yeah, a good number, an unlucky number, Friday the 13th, baker's dozen, its perfect!"

'Warning, reactor overload! Warning reactor overload!' said a female computer like voice with urgency clear in it 'Recommend reactor shut down. Plant will go critical in 13 minutes.'

With Bobby looking the other way Lisa and Homer came out of their hiding place and tiptoed over to Bart, but part of the way there Homer broke off from Lisa's path, picked up a loose pipe that was leaning against a wall and advanced on Bobby. Lisa hissed a whisper "Dad no!" but Homer didn't pay attention as he slowly crept up towards Bob holding the pipe above him like a weapon.

Lisa hurriedly went over to Bart, shushed him by placing her index finger up to her lips without making the noise that might alert Bobby –as if he really needed telling- and started to undo Bart's bindings. But Bart could feel she was having difficulty undoing them. _Come on Lis'. You're smart, if anyone can work out how to undo these then it's you._

'Warning, reactor overload. Plant will go critical in 12 minutes.'

Snap! Bart's pounding heart nearly missed a beat at that sound and Lisa stopped working on his bonds. Homer, as he'd slowly crept up towards Bob had stepped on what looked like a little twig left in the middle of the floor, what was that even doing there? Thankfully Bobby didn't seem to have noticed, he was too mesmerised by the raising control rods. Homer took another step forward and raised the metal pipe above his head ready to swing it down onto Bob's head. But then Homer slipped up, literally.

As his foot landed he fell backwards as a single roller-skate conveniently materialised right where his foot was due to land. Homer fell on his back with a thud and as he fell he lost his grip on the pipe, it flew out of his hands and then comically chose to land right on his head causing him to emit a loud "D'oh!"

"It seems I have more guests!" Bobby said whirling on Homer as if he'd known he was there the whole time. Bobby stepped on the front of Homer's shoes and somehow that brought Homer back up to a standing position as if he was as stiff as a board. Bobby then held out one hand away from Homer and a bat ejected from his sleeve "Why don't you take a seat!" and with one great swing Bobby swung the bat into Homer's stomach, he grunted as the force it caused him to fly backwards towards Bart and Lisa.

A four legged chair chose that moment to conveniently slide across the room and stop right next to Bart's own chair in time to catch Homer as he slammed into it. It did not fall or collapse under his weight or momentum. As he landed ropes snaked out of nowhere and wrapped around Homer's fat form like a dozen snakes and a duct tape patch slammed down over his mouth.

"I just hit a Homer Run, get it?" Bobby chucked at his own twisted joke and tossed the bat over his shoulder where it mysteriously faded away after it landed on the ground. "Homer Simpson, you were always good for a laugh!"

'Warning, reactor overload. Plant will go critical in 11 minutes.'

* * *

Lisa remained hidden behind Bart's chair, it was a feeble hiding place but so far Bobby didn't seem to notice her. That illusion was broken when something wrapped itself around her arms and legs, ropes which forced her into a straight backed chair as more ropes snaked out and wrapped themselves around her stomach and chest holding her firmly in place and a duct tape patch was smacked forcefully over her mouth. The chair then 'walked' on all four of its legs to sit itself next to Barts so Bobby could clearly see all three of them.

"Sorry to leave you all tied up like this!" Bobby said smiling that creepy smile "But I have a town to terrorize!"

Bobby moved to one side of the room which mysteriously now had what looked like half a TV studio conveniently placed in there. There was a camera, a large desk with a chair and behind the desk were the words _GF News_ in big green letters behind it. Bobby approached the desk and sat down, picking up a pile of papers from the desk and shuffled them quietly and coolly as if he had nothing to concern him whatsoever.

'Warning, reactor overload. Plant will go critical in 10 minutes.'

Suddenly Bobby cleared his throat and peered directly into the camera that was operated by no one yet appeared to be working of its own accord.

"People of Springfield, please attend carefully because the message that follows is vital to each and every one of you. I don't really know how to break this to you." He pulled a white handkerchief from his jacket pocket and wiped his rubber looking face that appeared to be sweating as if the next sentence he was going to utter was really going to break his heart to say. "But the bottom line is that in less than ten minutes you are all going to die" he let the words hang for a second. "Yes, that's right 'die!'"

The camera suddenly turned to face the window with the nuclear reactor beyond about to go critical "as you can see I have seized control of the local nuclear plant and have set the plant to explode in... how long would you say darling?" he said as the camera panned to look back at him.

'Warning, reactor overload. Plant will go critical in 9 minutes.'

"Thank you, darling." Bobby said "You have less than nine minutes to attempt to pack your things and get out of Springfield, but I doubt you'd have the time. I shall enjoy watching you all scurry around like pack animals, but don't worry it will all be over soon."

He looked like he was going to sign off but decided to add one last thing. "Oh and before any of you idiots think you are brave enough to try to play the hero please keep in mind that..." the camera panned to take in Bart, Homer and Lisa all tied up and gagged "...I have a number of hostages. If I see so much as a cop set foot in this structure then I will not be held responsible for my actions." He added darkly. Bobby stepped from his chair to stand in front of them and the camera and waved cheerily to his audience "Have a nice death" he smiled "Before we let you get back to America's Funniest Home Video's lets first see what the local weather will be like, Barbara how's it looking?"

The camera panned around again to Bobby, who had managed to move around the camera quickly without being seen and change both his clothes and gender. He was now cross dressed in a red, tight fitting woman's business suit and long, curly, blond hair. The cross dressed Bobby was standing in front of a wall with a map of Springfield on it.

"Well, Bobby as we can see tonight we're going to have clear skies, there won't be a cloud in the sky" he said in a very bad attempt at a woman's voice.

'Warning, reactor overload. Plant will go critical in 8 minutes.'

"Except maybe..." he... she... it... added "...A mushroom cloud!" and she cackled loudly and insanely for ten whole seconds before calmly down and adding "have a nice day." And the camera fell and became inactive.

Bobby swirled around in the familiar tornado and emerged back in his original form with his long multicoloured jacket. He now had a microphone in his hand and he approached the three Simpsons with an air of a TV show host. "Well Simpsons, you have but one life line left." He said as his face adopted an evil glint to it "That's contacting your government to see if they will accept my demands."

'Warning, reactor overload. Plant will go critical in 7 minutes.'

"Hmm. Not much time left" Bobby said idly to himself "Let's watch some TV!" and from his pockets he produced a rather large TV set and set it down in front of the Simpsons and turned it on before coming to stand between Bart and Lisa and gazed at that TV with an expectant look.

On the screen was Kent Brockman clearly trying to keep his cool under the circumstances. "Ladies and gentlemen, we have just heard from an unconfirmed source that the Springfield nuclear plant is about to go critical in about seven minutes. The explosion is going to kill everything and everyone." From somewhere off screen there came the noise of panic and destruction from the news crew. "The only other piece of news is the mystery of why on earth I'm sitting here still reporting to you doomed idiots when I can take the News helicopter and leave all you drunken asses to your doom."

Suddenly a figure came into the picture with Kent. It was Bobby! Lisa looked to her right where Bobby should be but he was gone!

"You want a really good reason?" he said to Brockman as an almighty bang could be heard off screen and a large piece of ceiling tile fell and slammed onto Brockman's desk followed by the tail wing of a helicopter with the letter six clearly printed on it. "That good enough for you?" and with that Bobby zoomed off and reappeared at Bart's side just seconds later. The TV screen then fizzled out to be replaced by a white screen showing a picture of Bobby viciously severing an electrical wire with his teeth, under that picture was the caption "We are currently experiencing technical difficulties."

'Warning, reactor overload. Plant will go critical in 6 minutes.'

Suddenly Bobby passed their line of sight now holding a telephone up to his left ear that didn't appear to be connected to anything because the cord was cut halfway down, yet he was clearly talking to someone on the other end.

"Hello, Joe Quimby" he said "What do you think of my performance, a little too much perhaps?"

"Now you listen here you green faced lunatic" Lisa heard the mayor say over the phone "This government and this town does 'not' negotiate with terrorists."

'Warning, reactor overload. Plant will go critical in 5 minutes.' as the computer said this loud warning sirens started bellowing out of every corner of the room.

There was silence on the other side of the line for a moment before Quimby spoke again "Okay, name your demands and they're yours."

"I only want one thing from the people of Springfield" Bobby said before shouting down the line "I WANT YOU ALL DO DIE HORRIBLY!" and he slammed the phone down on the console and the handheld phone shattered into a million pieces. He cackled like a loon again holding his hands up to the air and proclaiming. "Nothing in the world can stop me now AHAHAHAHA!" his eyes were filled with clear insanity "Soon my criminal record will be wiped clean from all computers in Springfield and I can start this world on a clean slate, soon I will be rid on the bane of my life for good, soon every bug eyed, yellow skinned character in this town will be obliterated once and for all. Soon, I... Robert Underdunk Terwilliger, Sideshow Bob will be free at long last, AHAHAHAAAHAHAA!" and he cackled like an utter loon.

'Warning, reactor overload. Plant will go critical in 4 minutes.'

This was her last chance, Lisa had formed a plan in her head. It was a feeble one and it wasn't likely to work but Bob had fallen for simpler tricks in the past. Her plan sounded insane and it started off in an insane manner because she started to giggle, giggle under her duct tape gag. A giggle of ridicule aimed at Bobby.

"What?" Bobby asked forcefully as she just continued to giggle and giggle. Lisa had a brief glance at Bart, though he couldn't speak she knew he probably thought she'd cracked up and totally lost it.

Clearly infuriated by this Bobby stamped over to Lisa, grabbed her duct tape gag and ripped it off with such force Lisa thought her lips might've been ripped off. But despite this pain she forced herself to continue to giggle, because this all rested on how well she could pull this off.

"You're not Sideshow Bob" she said forcing herself to drain all the fear from her voice and look Bobby in the eyes.

"What?" he bellowed, his inhuman sounding, echoing voice gave that word even more outrage then Bob was giving them. "Of course I'm Sideshow Bob."

"You're not Sideshow Bob" Lisa giggled again "Sideshow Bob would never have been able to break into the Springfield Nuclear plant. He wouldn't have the intelligence to even sneak past the guards with a kid in his arms or know how to work the controls to raise the cadmium control rods."

"But I tell you I am Sideshow Bob!" Bobby said looming over Lisa in a threatening manner, but Lisa forced her fear aside. She had to control it, her plan hinged on how well she could act this part.

"Sideshow Bob has tried to kill Bart and myself and our family and the entire population of Springfield countless times. But in all those times Sideshow Bob has always come up with an original way of attempting it despite failing. Using a nuclear bomb to kill an entire town, holding us hostage so on one will come and stop you. Cleaver and sinister maybe, but Bob's done it all before. I can say one thing about Bob and that is he never gives a repeat performance, he's an original."

Bobby was now leaning over Lisa with hate burning in his eyes. He tipped her chair back and peered into her eyes so intently that it would've burnt her to a crisp.

"I AM Sideshow Bob!" Bobby proclaimed again gripping her wrists so tightly it was difficult to stop herself yelping. "What other person would want Bart dead so badly?"

"Well let's see, there's Principle Skinner, Groundskeeper Willy, Comic Book Guy after he left a finger print smudged on a number one issue of the Green Lantern, there's also Mr. Burns and Smithers who'll want Bart dead for so many things." Lisa said continuing to rattle off a list of names, though half of the names she said were just made up it seemed to have the right effect.

Bobby set Lisa's chair down, released he wrists which were starting to go numb and turned to Bart, he reached out and ripped the duct tape gag from Bart's mouth.

"You know I'm Sideshow Bob don't you?" Bart hesitated unsure of what to do. "Umm..." If Lisa could've stamped on his foot she would have, as it was she could only move her feet a little so it was just over the front of his left shoe and she pressed down hard and gave Bart a sideways look to get him to play along.

"I'm not so sure" Bart said finding some form of cool in this situation. "You could be Sideshow Bob..."

'Warning, reactor overload. Plant will go critical in 3 minutes.' They didn't have much time.

"...But I'd put my money on Skinner. He was pretty P. when I put Viagra in his coffee." He chuckled "I've never seen him so mad when he pulled me into his office the next day. I didn't know what it was until he told me, and it was strong stuff, he said he couldn't remove his shorts until after midnight!"

"I AM Sideshow Bob!" Bobby proclaimed again. It appeared to be working as he took a step back fuming over his two greatest enemies not knowing who he was. His pride was always Sideshows greatest weakness.

"No Bart" Lisa said adding more fuel to the fire "I bet its Bumblebee man"

"I am Sideshow Fricken' Bob!" Bobby shouted, the room actually shook with the force of his voice and his irises looked like they were about to burst into flames.

"Prove it!" both Bart and Lisa shouted together.

"You want proof?" Bobby yelled coming closer to them his eyes still ablaze in anger "You want proof? Watch closely" he said as he raised his hands behind his head "I'll give you little bastards proof!"

Bobby pulled on the edges of the Mask and it started to peel away from his face and it folded itself up into wooden crevasses. A strong gale blew from his body as a whirl wind surrounded his form stripping him of his multicoloured coat which became a dusty looking tattered suit and tie.

'Warning, reactor overload. Plant will go critical in 2 minutes.'

His hair fell and became curly. Bobby's angry looking face began to harden and crust over into green painted wood and the expression morphed back into the mischievous looking expression the inert wooden form of the Mask had. It let go of Bob's face with a snap and the gale stopped leaving Sideshow Bob powerless.

"Is this proof enough for you?" he fumed holding the wooden mask in his left hand and pointing to his face with his right.

"Plenty!" Lisa shouted in triumph because Bob had made one critical error. Without the powers of the Mask of Loki he was not only powerless and vulnerable, but whatever he'd conjured up using the Mask's powers had vanished the moment he removed it. So the camera, the studio looking area, all that vanished, but most importantly so had Bart, Lisa and Homer's rope bonds and gags because Bob had conjured them up using the powers of the Mask.

With Bob leaning over them Lisa kicked out trying to catch the Mask with her foot, but her kick went wide and caught Bob straight in the groin. Bob bent over heavily exhaling in pain as Bart administered a kick of his own aimed at Bob's belly. This missed as well but instead hit the Mask clean on its chin forcing it from Bob's grasp.

'Warning, reactor overload. Plant will go critical in 60 seconds.'

Bart leapt up off the chair to give chase to the Mask as it flew and spun like a Frisbee through the air, but Bob reached out and grabbed Bart's ankle causing him to fall forward onto all fours. Homer also got up, but when he saw the way Bob had grabbed Bart's neck and started squeezing in a mad rage Homer decided to break up the fight, mostly because he said Bob was "doing it all wrong" that left Lisa to run past the three of them and chase after the Mask as it whirled further and further away from them, it didn't appear to be dropping and almost looked like it was hovering while twirling in the air.

'Warning, reactor overload. Plant will go critical in 50 seconds.'

Suddenly the Mask fell, impacted the floor and bounced through an open door into the reactor room and Lisa put as much effort as she could into her short legs to catch the Mask up before it fell into the reactor pool. Perhaps it would keep Bob from getting at it again but there was a few very good reasons why it was best if it didn't fall into the reactor.

'Warning, reactor overload. Plant will go critical in 40 seconds.'

One, Lisa didn't know what would happen if it did. It had seemed fairly indestructible with all the other destructive methods she threw at it but with all that power locked inside such a small object it might cause an explosion big enough to rip the planet in two if the reactor managed to release that energy. Second, she didn't know how to operate the consoles to stop the reactor going critical and the Mask might be their only chance of stopping it with only 40 seconds left.

'Warning, reactor overload. Plant will go critical in 30 seconds.'

The Mask impacted the floor again and started sliding along it towards the cooling pool. She was close to it but not close enough, it was going to fall in. But in one final desperate attempt Lisa dived at the Mask as it teetered on the edge of the pool. She fell onto the smooth floor and slid fast across it using her feet to gradually slow herself down. If she fell into the reactor she'd probably be killed in seconds, if she didn't catch the Mask then she'd be dead in seconds anyway. Her hands reached out, her fingers desperately trying to grasp the Mask.

'Warning, reactor overload. Plant will go critical in 25 seconds.'

The Mask started falling, it fell over the edge. But Lisa came to a halt just before her torso started to cross over the point of no return and her hands loosely caught the Mask in her grasp. The craggy feeling wood was a welcome feeling to her, she had it back again.

'20 seconds.' The warning continued. Though she now had the Mask that didn't leave much time.

Lisa pushed herself away from the pool edge and rolled over onto her back. She gazed up at the Mask, its mischievous features peering down at her. She really didn't want to do this, but she had no choice. She gulped.

"Listen" she said addressing the inert wood but was really addressing the thing it would turn her into "I know we've had our differences but my... 'our' family is in danger and so is our town."

'15 seconds.'

"I don't care what you make me do anymore, I don't care if you won't let me have control again, I don't care if I remain as you forever. Just please!" tears started welling up in her eyes because she knew if she put it on she might never be herself, she might never be Lisa Simpson ever again, but if she didn't then soon there wouldn't be a Lisa Simpson at all, nor a Simpson family, nor a Springfield. She sniffed "Please..." she repeated through her sobs "just save everyone."

She turned the Mask over so she was facing the inside of it and could see the ominous green glow trying to trick her into putting it on. But this time she didn't need tricking because she fully intended to put it on again.

She lowered the Mask to her face. Everything was in slow motion at this moment, the second that ticked by felt like hours. She gulped because there was a doubt in her mind that 'she' her other self simply would not cooperate. But surely there was some shred of decency in that other persona of hers, wasn't there? Lisa couldn't decide, but it was too late now, she was already committed to what she was about to do.

'10 seconds'

She shut her eyes as she felt the Masks cold surface touch her face and the following warmth as it started to fuse to her skin. It began wrapping her head as if it was giving her a 'welcome back' kind of hug and just before the change started a twisted sounding voice from deep within her mind said one phrase coolly and confidently.

"_It's show time"_

* * *

**To Be Continued...**

* * *

**Authors notes: **I've taken some artistic licence with the construction of a power plant. In reality the core would never be left in such an exposed space and would be sealed inside a giant concrete dome to contain the energy released. So please don't rely on this chapter to help you with your exams :D ;).

Originally I was going to have Marge and Maggie in the control room with the rest of the Simpsons, but it was proving far too difficult to write Marge or Maggie into the story at this stage and they just felt pretty useless when considering what was going on around them, so I decided to leave them out and let it focus mainly on Homer, Lisa and Bart.

-Hope you all enjoyed the new chapter.


	26. The Final Kick

**Anonymous Review replies since (09/08/2011)**

**CoolKid13:** Thanks for the reviews mate. I might release what I've written about Milhouse's Mask later on, or alternatively I might recycle it into something else. ;)

**[Unnamed]** Yeah, I noticed in the comic books and the cartoons that the objects the Mask produces don't always vanish into thin air once the Mask is removed, but I think it's more interesting if they do and it kind of make's sense since the clothes and everything else a Mask wearer wears also vanishes once its removed. Anyway hope you enjoy the newest chapter and I hope it doesn't disapoint.

* * *

**Chapter 25**

**The Final Kick**

While Lisa chased after the Mask Bart, Homer and Bob continued to fight each other. Bob reached out and tried to pull on Homer's hair, or what's left of it, and ended up pulling out the two strands he'd combed over.

"My hair, my hair!" Homer screamed letting go of Bob's shirt, "OH I'm a freak!"

Desperately Bob tried to get Bart off him, the boy had grabbed hold of both his legs in a desperate bid to stop him chasing after the Mask.

'10 seconds' said the warning computer and loud warning klaxons sounded. 10 seconds until the reactor blew? They were doomed.

There came an almighty bang followed by a crash of thunder and lightning from an open doorway where Lisa had chased the Mask. Oh no, she didn't? She didn't! She did because the familiar whirling sister twister burst through the door sparking and glowing, jets of lightning blasted out from the core of it.

This transformation distracted Bob, Bart and Homer from their fight and they just stared dumbly at the transforming Lisa.

'9' said the computer as the transformation came to a halt revealing Lisa, the other Lisa with the usual blood red dress, rubber green face, blond hair that curled back like shark fins, large teeth and creepy looking, lunatic, red eyes.

"Guess who's back!" she grinned showing her two rows of freakishly massive, white teeth.

'8'

"Lisa?" Bart said in shock, "Lisa!" Homer asked even more shocked and a little worried. Bart didn't know why Homer looked worried, Lisa hadn't tried to kill him yet.

'7'

"That's my name!" she said rolling her eyes in a crazy fashion.

'6'

"Sorry, can't stop, I've got to save my town and family" slowly she slid one of her feet behind her and then as quick as a flash she was a blur of motion going straight through the exit.

* * *

Less than six seconds to save everything? Plenty of time! That didn't concern her at the moment, what did was that she was back in the saddle, back in the driving seat. Oh how she'd missed this, the power she could wield at her finger tips and nothing to stop her using them, no ego, no super Ego to tell her what to and not to do, just the pure ID. She felt like she'd been set free from a prison like how the Genie must've felt at the end of Aladdin when he was set free from the lamp, she knew exactly how that felt. She had what she wanted, she had existence.

Within seconds she was in sector 7G where Homer operated as safety inspector, very badly she might add judging by the state of the corridors with green goo seeping out of all the pipes and the rats the size of big cats.

'5'

She came to a stop when she was inside Homer's work station. She had less than 5 seconds in the real world but with the powers of Loki she was slowing her perception of time, so 5 seconds became considerably longer, giving her plenty of time to flip through the console manual very quickly so she understood how it worked. She found some very curious reading material tucked between the pages of the manual. One minute she was reading about nuclear fission and the dangers of a radioactive meltdown when she was suddenly reading about how to make the perfect cupcake. Looking back Homer had tucked several issues of the Big Bake monthly between the pages of the manual which did nothing but hinder her quick learning.

'4' she heard the computer say as she finished the final chapter, slammed the book shut and went up to the console and began operating the controls to lower the control rods and vent the excess steam and inject cold water into the system to cool it down. But as she operated the controls they didn't appear to respond in the way she expected or wanted.

She flipped a dial which should raise the control rods and a small light should appear above the console to show that this was happening, but the light wasn't coming on. What was wrong now?

Quickly she dropped to the floor and ripped open a panel in the base of the machine, she didn't have time to find a screwdriver so she really did rip the panel off with her own fingers as easily as if it was made of cardboard. She nearly yelped when an avalanche of pastry, cakes, pies, buns and so on, fell right on top of her. Digging herself out she realised that Homer had filled the console with cakes. What a fat bastard!

Quickly she reached into the console and removed all the cakes she could find as fast as she could. Her mouth dropped to the floor and her eyes blew out with the sound of a whirling alarm. The console had no innards! All the circuits, all the electronics had been stripped from it to make room for all the pastry and baked confections.

'3'

This was not good, and that was an understatement. Still if the plant explodes she'd be alright, wearing the Mask she could easily survive this, but strangely she still felt motivated to stop it, she didn't understand why when she could do whatever she pleased, whenever she pleased and simply not care –she didn't have the capacity to care- yet for some reason she did.

Quickly she thought of what she could do now. The reactor works by lowering and raising control rods into the reactor core, well if she couldn't lower the control rods, then raise the reactor core!

"NEW PLAN!" she proclaimed and raced off back to the reactor and zoomed past Bob, Bart and Homer who from her point of view were moving incredibly, incredibly slowly, around the same speed as the average KFC staff.

She wanted to do something mischievous, like put a safe directly above Bart and Bob and watch it slowly drop on top of them but when the computer uttered that only 2 seconds remained she rushed past them into the reactor and dived into the water pool not even bothering to alter her attire to suit her environment. The water was very warm, so warm it would hard boil an average person in a microsecond, yet to her it just felt like a moderately warm pool.

When she broke the surface she flipped her hair back deliberately mimicking a scene from the Little Mermaid and waved at the frozen Bob, Homer and Bart shouting "Come on in, the water's lovely" and giggled a little manically before diving straight down again. She was on a mission after all.

"Okay, lets save the fricken' Universe" she said despite having her lungs full of water. She landed on the surface of the tank and said "Okay, where is it? The reactor cores not the fricken' universe." she explained, who she was explaining to she had no idea.

Slowly she walked towards one of the giant control cubes. Reaching behind her back she managed to pluck out a pair of large looking car jacks from the folds of reality. She placed one each under either one of the cores and pumped them as hard as her short stature could do aided by the powers of Loki, which incidentally made her very fast.

The platform raised up and made contact with the reactor core which was held in place by dozens of steel girders', well not for much longer. They broke away as easily as if they were made of paper and rapidly rose up to meet the control rods, slotting themselves into place perfectly, though this now meant everyone corner of the power plant was being zapped by a radiation leak, but looking at the state of the plant what else was new?

'1'

That was two cores down another four to go, but now she didn't have time to waste jacking them up as well. Car jacks cost money after all and she only had two to spare. Instead a third idea came into her mind. Why didn't she think of this one before? The reactor would go critical only if the cores had a critical mass, if the mass was cut down then you don't have critical mass therefore no atomic explosion.

Out of the folds of reality she produced a massive axe and mallet and began chopping and cutting at the large cubes at lightning speed, she only had nano seconds left. First she cut the cubes in half, then cut them in half and cut them in half and so on and so on. She didn't know what constituted a critical mass for Uranium but if she could prevent the neutrons causing further chain reactions then there would be no explosion.

She stopped and panted madly and didn't seem to mind she was breathing radioactive dust from the water as she did. She'd done all she could, this idea made sense at least to her but whether or not it worked in the real world, well she was about to find out.

'0' said the computer and Lisa shut her eyes and jammed her fingers in hear ears, this was going to be loud '... have a nice day.' Then there was nothing. Just nothing. After that last announcement an atomic explosion was obviously supposed to occur but it did not. She opened her eyes and saw that the glowing material she'd cut up was fading to a dirt black and the raised cores above were also settling down to a faint green glow. She did it! She stopped an atomic explosion! She'd saved this stupid town and her family and with 1 second to spare. Beat that 007!

* * *

'Nuclear meltdown averted, all systems returning to normal'

Bob had finally gained the upper hand and had Bart's neck in a lock with his left arm preventing the boy from moving while in his right hand he held a sharp knife which he pointed so the tip poked into Bart's gut.

Bart felt his face drain of colour when he realised he was possibly just seconds from being gutted like a fish.

"Get back or the kid's dog food" Bob said to Homer who slowly backed away holding up his hands.

"Now, now Bob lets think about this" Homer said slowly as if that would help Bob understand what he was about to say next "Now you could kill the boy and me and escape and no one will ever know it was you, everyone will think it was Bobby Green Face" This was supposed to be a reason for Bob not to stab Bart? "But think about it. Really think about it, because not killing us might be the greatest mistake of your life."

"Oh, I quite agree" Bob said and Bart felt the knife nip at his skin and a small amount of blood seeped out and stained his shirt. He thought he was going to die there and then when suddenly something burst through the solid wall spewing dust everywhere. It was the whirling sister twister!

Bart didn't know which he preferred right now, death by Bob or death by Loony Lisa.

"Knock, knock" Lisa said when she came to a sudden halt. "That's one nuclear reactor made safe and one town saved. But I'm going to have to bill you for the dress, radioactive isotopes are murder to get out." Her dark eyes then gazing at both Bob and Bart though Bart didn't know which of them that piercing evil gaze was for.

"Lisa... Honey?" Homer asked staring at the green headed Lisa in astonishment.

"Don't Homer, the Mask's driven her insane!" Bart yelled. Though a part of him wanted to see it most of him didn't want Lisa to attack or hurt dad.

"He's right, I'm insane, I'm so insane!" she rolled her eyes again like a nut to emphasise this. "I'm capable of saying and doing things the original Lisa would never do. In which case dad..." She wheeled on him "I would like to take this unique opportunity to tell you that you are the most pig headed, ignorant, slobby gas bag with a tank ass that's classified as one of the few human features visible from space!"

Homer was shocked into speechlessness, he remained perfectly still looking into the eyes of his possessed daughter. His face showed that he did look very hurt. "Lisa, Honey, you don't mean that right? Right?" he asked like a desperate child wanting recognition.

"As much as Hilter didn't mean to start a war" Lisa commented batting Homer away like nothing before wheeled back to Bob and Bart "Ahhh! That's cleared the air" she said giving them both that loony look again.

"Anyway, that's my side of the agreement done with." she said slapping her hands together for a job well done "Now then Bobby, you like knives right?" Reaching behind her back she brought her hands forward to show she now had a pair of giant, sharp knifes the size of surf boards. She grinned evilly at them both again. "I think the phrase you're looking for rhymes with 'Clucking Bell'!"

Bart felt Bob's grip on his neck tighten and the knife tip in his hand pressed even more firmly into his stomach.

"You think you can get to me before I fillet your brother?" Bob said twisting the knife a little to let the glint it cast catch Lisa's eye. Lisa did not look impressed nor did she look the slightest bit concerned, the only thing she looked was bored.

"Is that supposed to intimidate me?" she asked letting her eyes look at one large knife in her one hand then the other knife in her other hand before returning back to view Bob.

"Give me the Mask or Bart is dead meat" Bob said

"HA! What makes you think I care what happens to Bart? He's been a bane on my life since I was born." she swung the knifes away so the blunt, higher edges rested on her shoulders and she relaxed herself as if she was just going to sit back and watch something on TV. "Do what you want."

"Lisa!" Bart cried, didn't she have any conscience? Any soul, any compassion, any pity?

"Very well" said Bob's smooth voice and Bart felt the knife tip slowly start to pierce his skin and he clenched his eyes tight together and pathetically screamed for "mummy!"

"STOOOOP!" screamed a voice that bellowed out and echoed all around the room like a command from god.

Was Bart hearing things or did Looney Lisa just shout for Bob to stop? Bart opened his eyes to see Looney Lisa –the giant knifes had now vanished- looking at both Bob and Bart eyes wide and mouth open as if she was fearful. Was she?

* * *

What the heck was happening? The New and Improved Lisa wondered to herself. Bart was just about to get his guts ripped out, she should be happy about that because finally Bart will be gone from her life and she wouldn't have had to lift a finger or do it herself, so why was she shouting for them to stop?

Bart's fearful eyes were filled with as much confusion as Lisa felt in her head. There was something, some part of her, something still in her mind preventing her, no, outright refusing to just let her sit back and watch this gruesome spectacle. Was she feeling guilt? Pitty? Mercy? She didn't know the meaning of those words... Well actually she did but that was beside the point. She'd never felt any of these emotions before while wearing the Mask so why is she feeling them now?

She felt her brow lower and her eyes grow, her smiling mouth shrank into a serious frown and she could almost feel her eyes burn with red hot anger.

"LET – HIM – GO!" she said slowly now facing Sideshow Bob who looked unsure of this turn of events but Bob himself held the trump card, he had Bart so close to death that if she tried anything, to move anywhere then Bart was dead.

"GIVE – ME – THE MASK-" Bob said equally slowly and pushed the knife in a little making Bart yelp "or Bart is dead. Get my point?"

Gazing into Bart's fearful eyes and Bob's crazed expression just made Lisa even more confused. She'd beaten Bart, tortured Bart, even scared Bart half to death, but not one of her revenge plans she now realised involved Bart dying at the end of it –not intentionally at least- was this the limit she'd really go to in order to get revenge?

It was wired into the brains software to prevent physical harm, or in this case death, from befalling close relations and to try to save them. This must be the software that was only now becoming active in her mind. That's it! She didn't want Bart to die, just suffer a little for his crimes against her. Now she was confused, part of her didn't want Bart to die while the other really wanted to see him squirm under the knife which might result in him dying and that was the thing she didn't want at all.

Her fists clenched tightly and her body began to tremble with hate. She may not want to kill Bart or anyone else but right now she seriously considered making an acceptation for Bob.

"Give me the Mask and I will spare Bart's life" Y_eah right, and as soon as you put it back on we're both dead_, she thought. "Which will it be? The Mask, or your brother's life?"

This was too much, too much conflict, too much confusion, she couldn't seem to make up her mind what she wanted. An image was suddenly conjured up in her mind showed Bart dead on the floor with his guts hanging out, it was too much for her to take in, the waves of guilt, sadness and grief she was feeling was just too much, she couldn't control it, sort it, handle it. Lisa the pure ID just didn't have the capacity to cope or understand these feelings.

She felt her cartoonish features soften, her angry eyes became sad and she didn't think it was possibly but tears were starting to stream from her crimson eyes over the green rubber. She reached up with both hands and felt her rubber textured cheeks with her finger tips, and then she made her decision.

"Okay" she said in a voice that had lost all its unearthly vibrations to it, a voice that sounded a lot like her real voice "Okay, you win. I'll... I'll take off the Mask" she reached behind her head and dug her fingers into the fold of the Mask and started to part it. She realised this meant surrendering to the original Lisa Simpson and spending the rest of her life being governed by her Ego and Superego, locked away in the subconscious of a wimpy do-gooder. All this time she wanted nothing more than existence, to touch, to see and feel, and she'd abused the powers of this magic artefact to inflict pain and misery on Bart, but when it came down to a choice between her own existence in this form and Bart's life it was paradoxical that she would choose this option which was technically suicide. "Just don't hurt Bart" she added, and she pulled.

After a crack of thunder and a great gale of wind the Mask peeled off Lisa's face. Curiously though this time the wooden thing did not put up any resistance as it detached itself from her face and snapped back into its own inert wooden form. Lisa panted and gasped for breath. She didn't expect to be back to her old self so quickly if at all ever again.

Bob gripped Bart tighter in his head lock and held out his right hand with the knife loosely held in it and waited to receive the Mask again.

"Now, the Mask" he said gazing into Lisa's eyes.

"Don't give it to him, Lis-" Bart said but Bob tightened his grip around his neck even further.

Looking at the Mask, its mischievous face smiling up at her as it waited for its next wearer, she slowly started walking closer towards Bart and Bob.

"The Mask!" Bob said impatiently "Give it to me!" he commanded.

"No" Lisa said simply and her eyes snapped back up to meet Bobs, who looked a little unsettled by the look she was giving him. In the next few seconds Lisa had used the indestructible Mask to knock Bob's knife held hand wide and catapulted herself forward with the Mask held out in front of her, its face still facing her and its inside facing her brother's head "I'll let Bart 'Give it to you'"

She rammed the Mask fully onto Bart's face and instantly she watched its edges stretch out like four tentacles very quickly, encasing Bart's head like a clawed hand.

Lisa pulled herself away from him, but Bob didn't have time enough to react because as soon as the tentacles joined together behind his head there was a brilliant flash of light which produced a great gust of wind as Bart's form was forced to twirl into the tornado, a transformation that pulled Bob into the twister with Bart. Bob screamed as he was sucked back into yet another vortex.

The transformation stopped and Bart emerged as his original Mask self. He held Bob in a dancing pose with Bob leaning back in Bart's arms as he leant over him, a romantic look in his eyes.

"Oh you're so dominating" he chuckled "Has anybody told you for someone with large feet you move very well" and Bart laughed again before dropping Bob painfully to the floor. Stepping over him Bart threw up his arms and shouted. "BJS is back in DA HOUSE!"

Slowly Bob started crawling away from them and Bart didn't seem to notice as he was too busy giving Homer a radioactive nuggy.

"Bart, Sideshow Bob's getting away!" Lisa called and in that instant Bart was standing next to her making her jump, she still wasn't used to that.

Bart seemed unconcerned about Bob as he reached into his trouser pockets and pulled out a length of paper again and gazed at his prank list. "All in good time, sis" Bart said peering at the paper "We've fallen behind on our prank list. Let's see we were up to here, number 8, drop a spider down Lisa's dress."

Lisa shrank away a little when Bart reached into his trouser pockets again and pulled from it a live wriggling spider just as Bob made his exit out the door.

"Bart, if Bob get's away he's just going to come back for us again and again" Lisa shouted more desperate to avoid this prank then stop Sideshow Bob. Bart seemed to consider these words for a moment and rubbed his rubber chin with his free hand.

"You make a convincing argument." He said at last, then he grinned a little unsettlingly "and this party wouldn't be a party without a clown to torture."

Bart leaned so far back the laws of physics say he should fall down, yet he didn't, it was a cartoonish pose to indicate when a character was about to zoom off. But Bart hesitated, straightened up and glanced at the wriggling spider still in his hands.

"Here, look after this for me would ya?" he said, quickly opening the front of Lisa's dress and dropping the spider down it. Lisa screamed in disgust as Bart finally catapulted himself out the door after Sideshow while cackling like an utter loon.

* * *

He did it again, how could he have fallen for the same trick twice? Bob wondered as he ran as fast as his legs could carry him away from this insanity. He'd had unlimited power, the ability to shape reality to his will and he threw it all away because no one believed he was Sideshow Bob. Only now did he realise this was a trick to get him to take it off. Fat Tony was right, one of Sideshow Bob's weaknesses was his pride.

Passing a row of windows he looked down into the nuclear plants car park and could see the battered police squad car he'd stolen the night before. If he could get to it he could escape, after all 'those that fight then run away will live to fight another day' and he wasn't going to try to kill any of the Simpsons, not while they were in that mask.

Dozens of flickering blue and red lights suddenly appeared on the horizon followed by the distant whine of sirens. It was the police! Bob wasn't intending to go back to jail, to stay in one spot where any munchkin wearing the Mask could get him. He'd get down to his stolen squad car and take the exit off the plant before the shooting started.

Bob's heart suddenly skipped a beat when he felt something leap onto his back and short arms snake around his neck but not so tight that it was a stranglehold.

"Where do you think you're going?" said the unearthly voice of Bart Simpson in the Mask. "Somebody around here promised me some laughs, and you're gonna give me them!"

Bob yelled in panic and swung himself this way and that trying to dislodge the kid but he held on too tightly.

Bart gripped the collar of Bob's creased suit in both hands and leapt off his back at the same time ripping Bob's clothes from his body like it was one all one piece of clothing. Bob was panicked to find himself in a clown outfit and he now had a helmet rammed onto his head so hard it covered his eyes momentarily until he managed to remove it. Bob's eyes widened as he saw the massive item Bart pulled from inside his red jacket. It was a massive cannon with yellow and red painted patterns on it.

Bart grinned manically at him and said "I think you can see where this is going."

Sideshow didn't have time to react as he was hoisted up and into the mussel of the cannon, it tilted upwards so it pointed directly through the window. Bob heard the unmistakable hiss of a fuse just being lit and...

"It's probably a bad time to ask, Bob" Bart said "but you are wearing a helmet, right?"

If Bob had time to answer he still wouldn't have. He was fired face first through the window of the three storey building, raised up in an arc and began to rapidly descend to the ground towards the arriving police cars.

He honestly thought he was going to die there and then until someone got in his way. Lou and Ed had just stepped out of their squad cars and with several officers in toe were advancing towards the power plant when Bob slammed right into them knocking all of them to the ground, and somehow producing the sound of bowling pins being knocked over as he did it.

Bob landed on the solid concrete a little bruised but otherwise okay.

"Is everyone okay?" Lou asked getting back to his feet.

"Hey Lou, you're not gonna believe who this is!" said another cop. Bob had finally decided he'd had enough, he couldn't take another encounter with that crazed masked Bart again.

Bob quickly got to his knees and grabbed Lou's shirt with manic fear "Take me away, lock me in solitary" he said trying to pull Lou a little down to his level "just keep that maniac away from me!"

This might not turn out so bad Bob considered, because Bart was wearing the Mask they'd think he was_ Green Face_ and maybe, just maybe they could do for him what he's failed to do so many times. Kill Bart Simpson.

* * *

Lisa had only just managed to remove the spider from her dress when Bart Simpson suddenly zoomed back into the room, bowing low like a performer just finishing off a neat trick.

"Thank you, thank you, you're too kind" he said straightening up "And for my next trick, I'm gonna make Lisa eat bugs through a straw!"

"Oh no" Lisa mumbled to herself as Bart reached into his pockets again and produced a jar full of creepy crawling insects and a very narrow straw.

"I saw them do this on survivor once!" Bart said grinning like a loon.

"Boy!" Homer said sternly finally piping up after all the madness he'd seen, utter madness that oddly didn't seem to phase him at all, and nor had Lisa's previous comments which he had apparently forgotten. "No one's going to force anyone to eat bugs on my watch!"

"Really?" Bart said suddenly producing in his hands as if by magic a steaming pizza with all the toppings, garlic, pepperoni, cheese, all kinds of peppers and odd looking brown things. "Want a pizza?"

When dad saw that pizza his drool reflex went into overdrive and he threatened to drown himself in his own drool. Without hesitation he dived at the pizza and began wolfing it down.

Bart was suddenly next to Lisa again and he winked at her "It has all the trimmings, tasty soft crust, tomato sauce, with all the finest spices and toppings you could think of. Including a lot of 'escargot'." Bart said the last word slowly.

"Escargot? You mean snails?" Lisa realised.

Homer stopped stuffing himself for a second and turned to them. Lisa thought Homer would have a look of utter disgust on his face. But he glanced back down at the tasty pizza, shrugged and his eating reflex kicked right back in.

"Now who's eating bugs?" Bart wiggled his brow at her.

"Snails aren't bugs, Bart, they're gastropods" Lisa corrected

"You have to kill the moment don't you?" Bart said a little annoyed "He's gonna have a lot of 'gas' from that anyway. I laced the pizza with madras sauce."

Suddenly it registered to Lisa, Bart was standing right next to her. She waited for just the right moment when he was facing her and she quickly reached behind his head with both hands, dug her nails into the fold in the back of the Mask and pulled with all her strength and it quickly peeled off Bart's face with a few flashes and bangs. Just before it disconnected from his face and became completely inert again Lisa saw it stick its tongue out at her before it snapped off Bart's head and returned to its original wooden form.

Yes! She had it, she had the Mask back and this time she was going to make sure it never fell into the wrong hands, or anyone else's again. She was over the moon, she felt as if her fears had melted away like ice bergs, she had a feeling nothing was going to go wrong now.

"OKAY, _GREEN FACE_ WE KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE!" said a distant voice amplified by a mega phone. "THIS IS THE SPD, COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS UP AND DROP ALL YOUR WEAPONS, INCLUDING ANY SLINGSHOTS, BATS OR PIES YOU MAY BE CARRYING OR WE COME IN THERE AND START SHOOTING."

"You think they'd be grateful after I handed them Sideshow Bob" Bart said dusting his arms down rubbing his sore looking cheeks after the Mask had stretched them to try to stay connected to him.

"You did what?" Lisa yelled "Bart, what if he tells the police about this Mask? What if he's put two and two together and found out 'we' were _Green Face_ the whole time?"

"Who'd believe him?" Bart shrugged.

"After everything the police have seen us do, do you think they'll be sceptical about a mask that grants its wearer the powers they've seen countless times over?" Lisa argued.

They both gazed down at the Mask in Lisa's hands, the curse that had caused this family so much trouble over the past few weeks and it was still causing trouble for them even when it's not even being worn. "There's only one way out of this" Lisa finally concluded looking at Bart "_Green Face_ is going to have to be seen to die." Lisa looked directly at Bart and held out the Mask towards him but Bart suddenly took a massive step away from her.

"Whoa, whoa, there's no way I'm putting that curse back on my face!" Bart said holding up his hands and spreading his fingers to make it clear he didn't want it.

"I don't want to wear it again!" Lisa insisted holding the Mask out for Bart to take it, but again he refused. "You have more control over it then I do."

"I'm not putting it on" Bart insisted straight back pushing it back towards her.

"Do you really want me to wear it after what I nearly did to you last time?" Lisa said holding it right back out again. But it became obvious that neither of them wanted to put the Mask on again.

"Hey, where's my Pizza?" Homer moaned wriggling his fingers through thin air. The pizza had been made with the Mask and now that it wasn't being worn again the pizza just vanished but Lisa wasn't in the mood to explain that to him right now. Wait a minute!

Lisa and Bart suddenly turned to each other and appeared to have the same idea. Homer didn't cause much trouble in his mask form, all he really wanted to do was just eat and eat and eat. Lisa saw Bart smile a little to show that they indeed were having the exact same idea.

"Oh Dad" they both said turning towards him, the Mask in hand.

* * *

With Sideshow Bob taken into custardy and locked in a squad car Officer Lou, in full riot gear and gun in hand, started to advance towards the main entrance of the nuclear plant flanked by several other officers in full riot gear.

With Wiggum in hospital Lou was put in charge of the investigation and arrest of_ Green Face_ who had become such a problem that the mayor had ordered that _Green Face_ be taken by any means necessary. Dead or alive, preferably dead.

Lou however had apprehension and cold fear rising from the pit of his stomach. He knew all too well that the pea shooters they were carrying had absolutely no effect on _Green Face_ but their superiors just would not listen. '_Green Face_ is a man and a man can be killed' they said. Well they hadn't seen _Green Face_'s invulnerability first hand.

A massive bang and a crash came from three stories up and a whirling twister like object fell to the ground and landed in front of them, unmistakably _Green Face_ and Lou prepared to take a beating from him since he...she... it had recently turned so violent.

The twirling figure came to a stop, but it was not who Lou expected or the form that he expected at least. This_ Green Face _Lou recognized as the first one, a fat man with the usual green head, no ears, red eyes, but he had brown plastic like hair on top of his head and was wearing the clothes of a rock and roll star with a black leather jacket with silver studs in it.

The chubby _Green Face_ was also stuffing his face with pies and cakes and chocolate that he held in his hands.

At the sight of him Lou and all the officers with him drew their guns and aimed them squarely at the gluttonous guy who didn't look very concerned, he just shrugged and said through a mouthful of cake "Hey, there's enough for everyone."

Lou wasn't going to even give him a chance, not after what he saw him do to his fellow officers at the police station last night.

"FIRE AT WILL, AND I MEAN THE GREEN GUY!" he added to stop_ Green Face_ making that same 'I'm not Will' quip again.

"Hey, wait a minute" _Green Face_ said almost in outrage dropping all his cakes and pies "I'm the only one who hasn't done a song and dance routine yet!" reaching into his pocket he produced a red, plastic kazoo, he pressed it up to his lips and blew through it.

"I'm going to dedicate this song to a very special friend of mine, who tragically died recently when he was pulled under the wheels of a bus. He was a good man and he'd want me to sing this song for him." He blew on his kazoo again and started to sing.

"OHHHH… The wheels on the bus go round and round

"Round and round

"Round and round….

But _Green Face_ never got to even start his inappropriate song as countless bullets started pelting him from all directions and with each impacted it sounded like he tried to yell the word "D'oh" it was probably supposed to be a longer word for something, a curse word Lou guessed and _Green Face_ just didn't have any time to finish it.

The shooting stopped momentarily as Lou called in for grenades to be thrown in with a simple signal flick of his hand. _Green Face_ stood there with dozens of holes going straight through him with no sign of him dropping.

"Now that wasn't very nice"_ Green Face_ said as a couple of grenades landed at his feet. Bending down he picked them up and Lou was certain he could hear him mutter "Mmmmmm, unstable, high explosive shaped like a pineapple" and he drooled a little before devouring the two bombs in one go.

There was a loud bang from somewhere inside his gut and his belly shook and expanded a great deal. "Ohhh!" _Green Face_ moaned clenching his stomach "I think I've got heart burn!" there then came another echoing explosion from his stomach and his gut ballooned out so much Lou thought it was going to pop, and after a little "Uh, oh" from _Green Face_ that's exactly what happened.

His stomach actually ripped open and the green troublemaker vanished in a cloud of fire and the last thing Lou heard _Green Face_ utter was "I regret nothing!"

Smoke fell on all of them clouding their vision. Lou tried to wave it away but it was just too think to see anything through it. He coughed and was ready to fire his revolver if he even caught the slightest glint of _Green Face_ anywhere.

But as the smoke and fire cleared _Green Face_ was gone, just gone, vanished. All that appeared to be left in the fat mans place was a bubbling pool of red goop that seemed to writhe and swirl as if something was trying to come out of it.

Lou cautiously approached and nearly yelped when he saw _Green Face_'s face suddenly pop up through the slime, it looked like it was writhing in agony as it tried to reassemble itself and yet couldn't. Then it looked as if it had given up fighting, its mouth muttered what looked like a silent drawn out 'No!' before the face shape sank back into the red puddle and all became still.

Lou pointed his gun down at the puddle expecting some kind of trick, expecting it to come back together like in the Terminator, because _Green Face's_ apparent end had been similar to the destruction of the T-1000 at the end of the second Terminator movie. But nothing happened, after five minutes nothing emerged from the puddle, nothing weird happened next, no dramatic reappearance at all, all that happened was the red puddle slowly evaporated into nothing, leaving no trace at all.

_Green Face_ was dead, as far as he knew and he hoped it was true. For the rest of the night _Green Face_ didn't show up anywhere else, usually the mischief lasted from night till dawn but there were no other reports of a green faced anything anywhere. The rest of the night was just normal and the rest of this case was just routine as Lou and his fellow officers rescued the Simpson kids and threw Sideshow Bob into a padded cell because he wouldn't stop screaming.

"_Green Face_ isn't dead! _Green Face_ was just a magic mask. Lisa, Bart and their family, they are all _Green Face!"_ clearly he was just as insane as before.

* * *

The police had been kind enough to give Bart and Lisa a lift back to the house in a squad car after some emergency crews decontaminated them for radiation, they had been in a nuclear power plant after all, and the technicians were confused why Lisa out of the two of them had the most radiation on her and was still alive, but after decontamination they let them go.

The entire town was in an uproar because of the nuclear threat that had now passed. The place was in utter chaos, streets were blocked, street gangs were waging war with each other and the cops, fires had broken out all over the place. It was a vision of hell and it was all because of that stupid mask.

When they arrived home Bart and Lisa immediately rushed upstairs, past mom who wanted answers to questions like "Where were you at this hour?" "Where's Homer?" and "Why were you brought back in police cars." Lisa wondered if she had not see the TV broadcast earlier that alerted the entire town, but apparently she hadn't for whatever reason.

They both ran into Bart's room and shut the door behind them because they didn't want mom to see what was going on. There they found Homer still wearing the Mask laying on Bart's bed as they had arranged with him before letting him put the Mask on again. It was a brilliant idea to make Homer make _Green Face_ appear to die because Homer could be easily controlled with a simple promise, the promise of food and so far it had worked a treat, as far as the police knew _Green Face_ was dead.

Homer had a bucket of fried chicken in one hand and a remote control in the other for a massive plasma screen TV on Bart's desk that was not there before.

"COOL!" Bart said at the TV that appeared to be showing some kind of wrestling type show. But Lisa wasn't interested in what was on TV. She approached Homer and held out her hand.

"Dad" she said stretching her fingers out to receive the thing Homer knew she wanted.

"Where's my giant cake?" Homer asked between bites on a chicken leg.

"You get it when you take the Mask off" she waved her fingers upwards a little "Come on, off with it and we'll throw in a tank of beer." She lied.

"BEER!" Homer yelled excitedly. He reached behind his head and pulled off the Mask so quickly it ripped off all Homer's stubble from his face leaving it bare and his head looking very awkward. He quickly passed the thing to Lisa and a large collection of short beard hair fell out and scattered onto the floor. Homer now clapped excitedly.

"Cake? Oh boy , oh boy and beer!" Homer clapped again.

"Dad there wasn't any cake" Lisa confessed putting the Mask behind her back to stop dad getting at it again.

"No cake? But you promised" Homer said his eyes drooping childishly in a way that made Lisa feel sorry for him.

"We just haven't got it yet" Bart interjected "But if you raise our allowance we might get it quicker."

"Done and done!" Homer said reaching into his pants, pulling out his wallet and giving Bart a handful of green bills.

Homer then left them both alone in Bart's room with the Mask of Loki. They both peered at its mischievous look and its ominous glow that attracted so many unwary and unwise and tricking them into putting it on. But it didn't work on Bart and Lisa anymore because they were all too familiar with it.

Then Bart uttered the one question Lisa herself was considering. "Okay, what are we going to do with it?"

* * *

**Epilogue**

The sun rose on a beautiful new day in Springfield, a perfectly normal day or as normal as you could get in this crazy world that Bart and Lisa lived in, but it was much less crazy now without someone wearing the Mask every night.

School was full of chatter that _Green Face_ had been killed and completely obliterated by the police, discussions were still going on even weeks after the nuclear incident. Some whispered that he was still alive because they never found a body, just a mass of goo. But to both Bart and Lisa _Green Face_ was dead and this time he was going to stay dead.

Bart and Milhouse were friends again after Bart's little outburst against his friend the night he lost the Mask and Lisa's grades were coming back up to scratch now that she didn't have to worry about the stupid thing because it was safely tucked away under the floor boards in her bedroom again.

Lisa studied hard and Bart pranked even harder until the time came one day to go home on the bus. Dinner was quiet and mom had never mentioned or asked anything about the Simpsons involvement in the death of _Green Face_ a few weeks ago. Lisa guessed dad might've explained everything to mom, but knowing dad he probably didn't.

An hour later when Lisa and Bart carried a large, empty trunk down from the attic mom seemed to understand what they were up to without even asking and just turned away to let them get on with it. Lisa had asked where Bart had managed to find an empty trunk in the attic but he just said 'it was full of Homer's crap' which meant it was not empty when he found it. Lisa later found out it used to contain dads record collection made from the more brittle wax rather than the more sturdy and impact resistant vinyl, a fact they later had to conceal to stop Homer getting mad at them.

The news from Kent Brockman that night was all good. The Krusty the clown set had been rebuilt, Sideshow Bob was finally back inside prison and thrown into a padded cell, and Police Chief Wiggum had made a full recovery and was expected to be out of hospital in a few days. Plus Kent briefly mentioned there was some danger alert because unexploded dynamite from the collapse of the Springfield Beaver dam a few months ago was still being found all over the banks of the Springfield river.

All in all the day wasn't just normal, it was good.

A couple of hours after dinner both Bart and Lisa left the house on their bikes, Lisa had a back pack strapped to her back and trailing behind Bart's bike was a little red wagon with the large trunk in it.

They pedalled until they arrived at an old, stone bridge overlooking Springfield river. No one was around, not at this hour at least which means no one was going to witness what they were about to do.

Bart unlocked the pad lock on the truck using an old looking key, removed the lock and opened the trunk. Bart had filled it with Homer's old tools, tools which never got used except to build crappy furniture that fell apart the moment you looked at it. So it wasn't as if they were throwing away anything useful and they needed something heavy to weigh the case down anyway.

Lisa unzipped her pink backpack and pulled out the Mask. This was it, they were finally going to be rid of it for good. She handed it to Bart who parted the mass of spanners and screwdrivers and placed the wooden mask into the trunk before covering it with the tools. They both had one final gaze at the mischievous thing before they shut the case and clamped it closed. Bart then replaced the small padlock onto the case and clipped that shut as well.

Together they heaved the heavy, rattling case onto the side of the bridge and prepared to shove it off.

Lisa hesitated pushing it though. Strangely this felt a little like murder to her. After all their misadventures with that cursed mask for some reason her mind was looking upon it as a living thing. It was a crazy thought since the only life it had was the one given to it by a person's inner most desires, no matter how mad they may be, but it was more than that. Lisa had a greater respect now for her 'Mask' self because she'd done what was probably the most human thing you could do, sacrifice yourself to save another and in this case she gave up her own existence rather than let Bart die and throwing away the Mask was like condemning her to death.

This was crazy, why was she thinking like this? She was her ID to an extent. Lisa 2.0 may have become a character in herself but that character is a part of her own character. She wasn't dead, she just had barriers to tell her when she was doing wrong allowing Lisa's judgement to decide what was worth listening to and what was worth ignoring. Though this made logical sense it still didn't stop her feeling pity for the thing in the trunk.

"Shouldn't we say something?" Lisa asked her brother.

"Okay" Bart said turning to the case and looked as if he was about to say a prayer or something by clasping his hands together, but he simply said "Good riddance!" and placed his hands back on the case and tried to push with all his might but it didn't budge an inch. Lisa sighed and placed her hands on the case along with Barts'.

One, two, three and they pushed as much as their weak bodies could until the case slipped off the edge of the bridge and fell into the river with a splash. Quickly standing on top of the red wagon to give them extra height both Bart and Lisa watched the case float briefly a little ways down the river before disappearing into the bubbling depths.

It was finally gone, gone for good. Lisa doubted anyone would find it again, at least not in their lifetimes. The Springfield river was so polluted if anyone went swimming or even diving into it then their life expectancy was very low and for once Lisa wished that Springfield never decided to go green and clean up the river.

They both watched the bubbles from the sunken trunk rise to the surface for a few minutes expecting the thing to pop up again like Harry Houdini escaping from an impossible trap. But soon the waters became calm, a slightly radioactive green but calm.

The sun was setting and Bart and Lisa had to get back home before dark or they would face a greater danger then losing their minds to a Norse artefact. Their mother.

"I'm glad that's over" Bart said as they peddled back home together.

"I just hope it is Bart" Lisa said. That Mask was like a bad penny, it always seem to turn up somewhere and end up in someone else's hands but surely this time it'll remain hidden and won't bother anybody for a long, long time.

Lisa didn't want to mention it, but Homer bought Bart that Mask for a birthday present a few weeks ago from a freaky shop near Moes' that she never got to check out, what was worrying was that it was Lisa's birthday in a few months. She just prayed that Homer wouldn't buy her any presents from that very same shop or they were probably going to go through another mad misadventure just like this one.

* * *

**Later that night...**

The silent night and the slight green glow of the polluted Springfield river and the stillness of the air gave no indication of what was about to happen. The Mask had barely been sitting on the riverbed for more than five hours surrounded by slowly corroding tools condemned to remain until someone foolish dug it up again.

However the Mask didn't have to wait long because of where it had landed. Right on top of an unexploded stick of dynamite, one of the dozens that had failed to go off the day the Springfield beaver damn collapsed washing its remains into the river and ironically releasing the Mask from its previous prison.

Dynamite of course was an explosive but it shouldn't go off when wet, but mysteriously this one did spontaneously.

A jet of water spewed out from the river causing a quick radioactive rain to fall close to the bank and a loud bang echoed through the nearby forest but was practically unheard in nearby Springfield.

Scared and burnt bits of the truck surfaced a few seconds later floating with the flow of the river following it to wherever it led. Then it surfaced, the cursed Mask of Loki bobbing up and down in the river its presence hardly noticeable as it followed the rivers current back into Springfield, under countless bridges which had some people late out at night peering over the side down at it but none foolish enough to go after it, because it was after all to them just a piece of junk.

The Mask went straight through Springfield and slowly floated away from the small town. It'd move on, it always did. It would find another wearer, it always did. Someone foolish enough to think they can control the raw power of their own inner demons, and the Mask knew there were plenty of people like that around.

With the lights of Springfield vanishing into the distance the Mask floated past a sign, a big billboard with the words 'You are now leaving Springfield', but a few weeks ago Bart while in the Mask had spray painted an extra two words underneath the sign.

It now read 'You are now leaving Springfield. WELL DONE!'

* * *

**THE END**

* * *

**...of 'Things to do in Springfield when wearing the Mask'**

**But the Mask will return...**

* * *

**Authors notes****:** I just had to bring Homer's Mask back just one more time to see if I could get him to work better.

Though this is the end of 'Things to do in Springfield when wearing the Mask' I am considering writing a sequel where the Mask is worn by many other Simpsons characters. However I want to get my other Mask stories and some other stories finished/started off first before I write it.

I'm also thinking of writing this as part of a series of Simpsons crossovers with other movie/TV franchises.

**Special thanks to...**

Omnitrix1

OnyxSteelGray1213

TylerFG

The MB

GlaringEyes

DLSF

Maetch

CoolKid13

and to anyone I may have forgotten.

For all the great reviews that motivated me to continue writing and eventually finishing this story.

**Very special thanks to**

Matt Groening, for creating the Simpsons

Mike Richardson, for creating the Mask

'**Things to do in Springfield when wearing the Mask'**

Was written by

TimeLordParadox

(A.K.A.) Ross Pickering.

This story should NOT appear anywhere on the internet apart from FanFiction*net.

Hope you enjoyed the story and any future stories I may write.

Cheers

-TimeLordParadox


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